| 1 | =encoding utf8 |
| 2 | |
| 3 | =head1 NAME |
| 4 | |
| 5 | perlepigraphs - list of Perl release epigraphs |
| 6 | |
| 7 | =head1 DESCRIPTION |
| 8 | |
| 9 | Many Perl release announcements included an I<epigraph>, a short excerpt |
| 10 | from a literary or other creative work, chosen by the pumpking or release |
| 11 | manager. This file assembles the known list of epigraph for posterity, |
| 12 | and also links to the release announcements in mailing list archives. |
| 13 | |
| 14 | I<Note>: these have also been referred to as <epigrams>, but the |
| 15 | definition of I<epigraph> is closer to the way they have been used. |
| 16 | Consult your favorite dictionary for details. |
| 17 | |
| 18 | =head1 EPIGRAPHS |
| 19 | |
| 20 | =head2 v5.15.0 - Neil Gaiman, "The Graveyard Book" |
| 21 | |
| 22 | L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173748.html> |
| 23 | |
| 24 | If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all |
| 25 | you will have gained. |
| 26 | |
| 27 | =head2 v5.12.4 - William Schwenck Gilbert, "Trial By Jury" |
| 28 | |
| 29 | L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173725.html> |
| 30 | |
| 31 | You cannot eat breakfast all day, |
| 32 | Nor is it the act of a sinner, |
| 33 | When breakfast is taken away, |
| 34 | To turn his attention to dinner; |
| 35 | And it's not in the range of belief, |
| 36 | To look upon him as a glutton, |
| 37 | Who, when he is tired of beef, |
| 38 | Determines to tackle the mutton. |
| 39 | Ah! But this I am willing to say, |
| 40 | If it will appease her sorrow, |
| 41 | I'll marry this lady today, |
| 42 | And I'll marry the other tomorrow! |
| 43 | |
| 44 | =head2 v5.14.1 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> | http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >> |
| 45 | |
| 46 | L<Announced on 2011-06-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173650.html> |
| 47 | |
| 48 | At this point I'm no longer working for a company that makes me sign |
| 49 | my life away, but by now I'm in the habit. Besides, I still harbor |
| 50 | the deep-down suspicion that nobody would pay money for what I write, |
| 51 | since most of it just helps you do something better that you could |
| 52 | already do some other way. How much money would you personally pay |
| 53 | to upgrade from readnews to rn? How much money would you pay for |
| 54 | the patch program? As for warp, it's a mere game. And anything you |
| 55 | can do with perl you can eventually do with an amazing and totally |
| 56 | unreadable conglomeration of awk, sed, sh and C. |
| 57 | |
| 58 | =head2 v5.12.4-RC2 - James Russell Lowell, "Eleanor makes macaroons" |
| 59 | |
| 60 | L<Announced on 2011-06-15 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173609.html> |
| 61 | |
| 62 | Now for sugar, -- nay, our plan |
| 63 | Tolerates no work of man. |
| 64 | Hurry, then, ye golden bees; |
| 65 | Fetch your clearest honey, please, |
| 66 | Garnered on a Yorkshire moor, |
| 67 | While the last larks sing and soar, |
| 68 | From the heather-blossoms sweet |
| 69 | Where sea-breeze and sunshine meet, |
| 70 | And the Augusts mask as Junes, -- |
| 71 | Eleanor makes macaroons! |
| 72 | |
| 73 | =head2 v5.12.4-RC1 - Ogden Nash, "The Clean Plater" |
| 74 | |
| 75 | L<Announced on 2011-06-08 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173352.html> |
| 76 | |
| 77 | Pheasant is pleasant, of course, |
| 78 | And terrapin, too, is tasty, |
| 79 | Lobster I freely endorse, |
| 80 | In pate or patty or pasty. |
| 81 | But there's nothing the matter with butter, |
| 82 | And nothing the matter with jam, |
| 83 | And the warmest greetings I utter |
| 84 | To the ham and the yam and the clam. |
| 85 | For they're food, |
| 86 | All food, |
| 87 | And I think very fondly of food. |
| 88 | Through I'm broody at times |
| 89 | When bothered by rhymes, |
| 90 | I brood |
| 91 | On food. |
| 92 | |
| 93 | =head2 v5.14.0 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> | http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >> |
| 94 | |
| 95 | L<Announced on 2011-05-14 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172326.html> |
| 96 | |
| 97 | At the start of any project, I'm programming primarily to please |
| 98 | myself. (The two chief virtues in a programmer are laziness and |
| 99 | impatience.) After a while somebody looks over my shoulder and says, |
| 100 | "That's neat. It'd be neater if it did such-and-so." So the thing |
| 101 | gets neater. Pretty soon (a year or two) I have an rn, a warp, a patch, |
| 102 | or a perl. One of these years I'll have a metaconfig. |
| 103 | |
| 104 | I then say to myself, "I don't want my life's work to die when this |
| 105 | computer is scrapped, so I should let some other people use this. If I |
| 106 | ask my company to sell this, it'll never see the light of day, and nobody |
| 107 | would pay much for it anyway. If I sell it myself, I'll be in trouble with |
| 108 | my company, to whom I signed my life away when I was hired. If I give it |
| 109 | away, I can pretend it was worthless in the first place, so my company |
| 110 | won't care. In any event, it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission." |
| 111 | |
| 112 | So a freely distributable program is born. |
| 113 | |
| 114 | =head2 v5.14.0-RC3 - American Airlines Gate Agent, last call |
| 115 | |
| 116 | L<Announced on 2011-05-11 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172282.html> |
| 117 | |
| 118 | This is the last call for flight 1697 with service to Chicago and |
| 119 | continuing service to San Francisco. All passengers should already be |
| 120 | aboard. If you aren't aboard at this time, you will be denied boarding |
| 121 | and your bags will be offloaded. |
| 122 | |
| 123 | =head2 v5.14.0-RC2 - Greg Grandin, Fordlandia, "the Rise and Fall of Henry Ford's Forgotten Jungle City" |
| 124 | |
| 125 | L<Announced on 2011-05-04 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg171879.html> |
| 126 | |
| 127 | Over the course of nearly two decades, Ford would spend tens of millions |
| 128 | of dollars founding not one but, after the plantation was defastated |
| 129 | by leaf blight, two American towns, complete with central squares, |
| 130 | sidewalks, indoor plumbing, hospitals, manicured lawns, movie theaters, |
| 131 | swimming pools, golf courses, and, of course, Model Ts and As rolling |
| 132 | down their paved streets. |
| 133 | |
| 134 | Back in America, newspapers kept up their drumbeat celebration, only |
| 135 | obliquely referencing reports that things were not progressing as the |
| 136 | company had hoped. But there was one note of skepticism. In late 1928, |
| 137 | the Washington Post ran an editorial that read in its entirety: "Ford will |
| 138 | govern a rubber plantation in Brazil larger than North Carolina. This is |
| 139 | the first time he has applied quantity production methods to trouble" |
| 140 | |
| 141 | =head2 v5.14.0-RC1 - Bill Bryson, "In a Sunburned Country" |
| 142 | |
| 143 | L<Announced on 2011-04-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/04/msg171253.html> |
| 144 | |
| 145 | But then Australia is such a difficult country to keep track of. On |
| 146 | my first visit, some years ago, I passed the time on the long flight |
| 147 | reading a history of Australian politics in the twentieth century, |
| 148 | wherein I encountered the startling fact that in 1967 the prime minister, |
| 149 | Harold Holt, was strolling along a beach in Victoria when he plunged into |
| 150 | the surf and vanished. No trace of the poor man was ever seen again. |
| 151 | This seemed doubly astounding to meE<0x2014>first that Australia could |
| 152 | just I<lose> a prime minister (I mean, come on) and second that news of |
| 153 | this had never reached me. |
| 154 | |
| 155 | =head2 v5.13.11 - Walt Whitman, L<Leaves of Grass|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leaves_of_Grass> |
| 156 | |
| 157 | L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-03/msg00560.html> |
| 158 | |
| 159 | When the full-grown poet came, |
| 160 | Out spake pleased Nature (the round impassive globe, with all its |
| 161 | shows of day and night,) saying, He is mine; |
| 162 | But out spake too the Soul of man, proud, jealous and unreconciled, |
| 163 | Nay he is mine alone; |
| 164 | --Then the full-grown poet stood between the two, and took each |
| 165 | by the hand; |
| 166 | And to-day and ever so stands, as blender, uniter, tightly holding hands, |
| 167 | Which he will never release until he reconciles the two, |
| 168 | And wholly and joyously blends them. |
| 169 | |
| 170 | =head2 v5.13.10 - Egill Skalla-Grímsson, L<Egils saga Skalla-Grímssonar|http://www.heimskringla.no/wiki/Egils_saga_Skalla-Gr%C3%ADmssonar> |
| 171 | |
| 172 | L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Ævar Arnfjörð Bjarmason|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/02/msg169340.html> |
| 173 | |
| 174 | Skalat maðr rúnar rísta, |
| 175 | nema ráða vel kunni. |
| 176 | Þat verðr mörgum manni, |
| 177 | es of myrkvan staf villisk. |
| 178 | Sák á telgðu talkni |
| 179 | tíu launstafi ristna. |
| 180 | Þat hefr lauka lindi |
| 181 | langs ofrtrega fengit. |
| 182 | |
| 183 | =head2 v5.13.9 - John F Kennedy, L<Inaugural Address January 20, 1961|http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/John_F._Kennedy%27s_Inaugural_Address> |
| 184 | |
| 185 | L<Announced on 2011-01-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168335.html> |
| 186 | |
| 187 | In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been |
| 188 | granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I |
| 189 | do not shrink from this responsibility -- I welcome it. I do not believe |
| 190 | that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other |
| 191 | generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this |
| 192 | endeavor will light our country and all who serve it. And the glow from |
| 193 | that fire can truly light the world. |
| 194 | |
| 195 | And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you; |
| 196 | ask what you can do for your country. |
| 197 | |
| 198 | My fellow citizens of the world, ask not what America will do for you, |
| 199 | but what together we can do for the freedom of man. |
| 200 | |
| 201 | Finally, whether you are citizens of America or citizens of the world, |
| 202 | ask of us here the same high standards of strength and sacrifice which |
| 203 | we ask of you. With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history |
| 204 | the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth to lead the land we love, |
| 205 | asking His blessing and His help, but knowing that here on earth God's |
| 206 | work must truly be our own. |
| 207 | |
| 208 | =head2 v5.13.8 - Roger Williams, L<"The Fifth Gift"|http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/8/19/21304/8493> |
| 209 | |
| 210 | L<Announced on 2010-12-19 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/12/msg167271.html> |
| 211 | |
| 212 | The aliens called the box a "matter generator," but we'd be more inclined |
| 213 | to call it a matter duplicator. By connecting switches and potentiometers |
| 214 | between the copper posts it was possible to make the box mark off two |
| 215 | cubic rectangular areas of volume. Make a certain contact, and these |
| 216 | areas would be isolated within perfectly reflective fields. They could |
| 217 | be expanded or contracted by altering resistances between other posts. |
| 218 | As I worked out the user interface I built a little control panel for |
| 219 | the device. It was actually a clever way for the aliens to do things; |
| 220 | instead of trying to build controls we could use, they built us an |
| 221 | interface we could attach to controls that made sense to us. It could |
| 222 | also be automated. |
| 223 | |
| 224 | Once you had made the contact that established the shielded volumes, |
| 225 | if you made another certain contact the contents of the first volume |
| 226 | were copied to the second. The machine copied metal, plastic, steel, |
| 227 | and diamond with equal ease. Copies of copies of copies of copies were |
| 228 | indistinguishable from the originals at any magnification, even using |
| 229 | techniques like X-ray crystallography. |
| 230 | |
| 231 | =head2 v5.13.7 - Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski, 'The Matrix' |
| 232 | |
| 233 | L<Announced on 2010-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/11/msg166162.html> |
| 234 | |
| 235 | [Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one] |
| 236 | |
| 237 | Neo: Whoa. Deja vu. |
| 238 | |
| 239 | [Everyone freezes right in their tracks] |
| 240 | |
| 241 | Trinity: What did you just say? |
| 242 | Neo: Nothing. Just had a little deja vu. |
| 243 | Trinity: What did you see? |
| 244 | Cypher: What happened? |
| 245 | Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just like it. |
| 246 | Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat? |
| 247 | Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure. |
| 248 | Morpheus: Switch! Apoc! |
| 249 | Neo: What is it? |
| 250 | Trinity: A deja vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when they change something. |
| 251 | |
| 252 | =head2 v5.13.6 - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore" |
| 253 | |
| 254 | L<Announced on 2010-10-20 by Tatsuhiko Miyagawa|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/10/msg165183.html> |
| 255 | |
| 256 | The boy called Crow softly rests a hand on my shoulder, and with that |
| 257 | he storm vanishes. |
| 258 | |
| 259 | "From now on -- no matter what -- you've got to be the world's toughest |
| 260 | fifteen-year-old. That's the only way you're going to survive. And in order |
| 261 | to do that, you've got to figure out what it means to be tough. You following |
| 262 | me?" |
| 263 | |
| 264 | I keep my eyes closed and don't reply. I just want to sink off into sleep |
| 265 | like this, his hand on my shoulder. I hear the faint flutter of wings. |
| 266 | |
| 267 | "You're going to be the world's toughest fifteen-year-old," Crow whispers |
| 268 | as I try to fall asleep. Like he was carving the words in a deep blue tattoo |
| 269 | on my heart. |
| 270 | |
| 271 | (Translated from Japanese by Philip Gabriel) |
| 272 | |
| 273 | =head2 v5.13.5 - Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, "The Room in the Dragon Volant" |
| 274 | |
| 275 | L<Announced on 2010-09-19 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg164238.html> |
| 276 | |
| 277 | Candle in hand I stepped in. I do not know whether the quality of |
| 278 | air, long undisturbed, is peculiar; to me it has always seemed so, and |
| 279 | the damp smell of the old masonry hung in this atmosphere. My candle |
| 280 | faintly lighted the bare stone wall that enclosed the stair, the foot |
| 281 | of which I could not see. Down I went, and a few turns brought me to |
| 282 | the stone floor. Here was another door, of the simple, old, oak kind, |
| 283 | deep sunk in the thickness of the wall. The large end of the key |
| 284 | fitted this. The lock was stiff; I set the candle down upon the |
| 285 | stair, and applied both hands; it turned with difficulty, and as it |
| 286 | revolved, uttered a shriek that alarmed me for my secret. |
| 287 | |
| 288 | For some minutes I did not move. In a little time, however, I took |
| 289 | courage, and opened the door. The night-air floating in puffed out |
| 290 | the candle. There was a thicket of holly and underwood, as dense as a |
| 291 | jungle, close about the door. I should have been in pitch-darkness, |
| 292 | were it not that through the topmost leaves there twinkled, here and |
| 293 | there, a glimmer of moonshine. |
| 294 | |
| 295 | Softly, lest any one should have opened his window at the sound of the |
| 296 | rusty bolt, I struggled through this till I gained a view of the open |
| 297 | grounds. Here I found that the brushwood spread a good way up the |
| 298 | park, uniting with the wood that approached the little temple I have |
| 299 | described. |
| 300 | |
| 301 | =head2 v5.13.4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
| 302 | |
| 303 | L<Announced on 2010-08-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163150.html> |
| 304 | |
| 305 | `How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought Alice; |
| 306 | `I might as well be at school at once.' However, she got up, and began to repeat |
| 307 | it, but her head was so full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what |
| 308 | she was saying, and the words came very queer indeed:-- |
| 309 | |
| 310 | "'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare, |
| 311 | "You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair." |
| 312 | As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose |
| 313 | Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.' |
| 314 | |
| 315 | |
| 316 | `That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' said the Gryphon. |
| 317 | |
| 318 | `Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it sounds uncommon |
| 319 | nonsense.' |
| 320 | |
| 321 | Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if |
| 322 | anything would ever happen in a natural way again. |
| 323 | |
| 324 | `I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle. |
| 325 | |
| 326 | `She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with the next verse.' |
| 327 | |
| 328 | `But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How could he turn them out |
| 329 | with his nose, you know?' |
| 330 | |
| 331 | `It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was dreadfully puzzled by |
| 332 | the whole thing, and longed to change the subject. |
| 333 | |
| 334 | =head2 v5.13.3 - Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, "Good Omens" |
| 335 | |
| 336 | L<Announced on 2010-07-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/07/msg162230.html> |
| 337 | |
| 338 | Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading towards |
| 339 | Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would |
| 340 | notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth, |
| 341 | for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his |
| 342 | sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint. |
| 343 | |
| 344 | Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was |
| 345 | dammned if he wasn't going to finish it in the Bentley as well. |
| 346 | Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of |
| 347 | motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage |
| 348 | Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn't have been able to tell |
| 349 | that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it |
| 350 | had ever even been a car. |
| 351 | |
| 352 | There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have |
| 353 | been black, where it wasn't a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but |
| 354 | this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of |
| 355 | flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult |
| 356 | re-entry. |
| 357 | |
| 358 | There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the |
| 359 | metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still |
| 360 | somhow riding an inch above the road surface this didn't seem to |
| 361 | make an awful lot of difference to the suspension. |
| 362 | |
| 363 | It should have fallen apart miles back. |
| 364 | |
| 365 | =head2 v5.13.2 - Iain M Banks, "Use of Weapons" |
| 366 | |
| 367 | L<Announced on 2010-06-22 by Matt S Trout|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/06/msg161112.html> |
| 368 | |
| 369 | We deal in the moral equivalent of black holes, where the normal laws - |
| 370 | the rules of right and wrong that people imagine apply everywhere else |
| 371 | in the universe - break down; beyond those metaphysical event-horizons, |
| 372 | there exist ... special circumstances. |
| 373 | |
| 374 | =head2 v5.13.1 - Miguel de Unamuno, "The Sepulchre of Don Quixote" |
| 375 | |
| 376 | L<Announced on 2010-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160275.html> |
| 377 | |
| 378 | And if anyone shall come to you and say that he knows how to construct |
| 379 | bridges and that perhaps a time will come when you will wish to avail |
| 380 | yourself of his science in order to cross over a river, out with him! Out |
| 381 | with the engineer! Rivers will be crossed by wading or swimming them, even |
| 382 | if half the crusaders drown themselves. Let the engineer go off and build |
| 383 | bridges somewhere else, where they are badly wanted. For those who go in |
| 384 | quest of the sepulchre, faith is bridge enough. |
| 385 | |
| 386 | =head2 v5.13.0 - Jules Verne, "A Journey to the Centre of the Earth" |
| 387 | |
| 388 | L<Announced on 2010-04-20 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg159275.html> |
| 389 | |
| 390 | The heat still remained at quite a supportable degree. With an |
| 391 | involuntary shudder, I reflected on what the heat must have been |
| 392 | when the volcano of Sneffels was pouring its smoke, flames, and |
| 393 | streams of boiling lava -- all of which must have come up by the |
| 394 | road we were now following. I could imagine the torrents of hot |
| 395 | seething stone darting on, bubbling up with accompaniments of |
| 396 | smoke, steam, and sulphurous stench! |
| 397 | |
| 398 | "Only to think of the consequences," I mused, "if the old |
| 399 | volcano were once more to set to work." |
| 400 | |
| 401 | =head2 v5.12.3 - Howard W. Campbell, Jr., "Reflections on Not Participating in Current Events" |
| 402 | |
| 403 | L<Announced on 2011-01-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168368.html> |
| 404 | |
| 405 | I saw a huge steam roller, |
| 406 | It blotted out the sun. |
| 407 | The people all lay down, lay down; |
| 408 | They did not try to run. |
| 409 | My love and I, we looked amazed |
| 410 | Upon the gory mystery. |
| 411 | 'Lie down, lie down!' the people cried. |
| 412 | 'The great machine is history!' |
| 413 | My love and I, we ran away, |
| 414 | The engine did not find us. |
| 415 | We ran up to a mountain top, |
| 416 | Left history far behind us. |
| 417 | Perhaps we should have stayed and died, |
| 418 | But somehow we don't think so. |
| 419 | We went to see where history'd been, |
| 420 | And my, the dead did stink so. |
| 421 | |
| 422 | =head2 v5.12.2 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition" |
| 423 | |
| 424 | L<Announced on 2010-09-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg163852.html> |
| 425 | |
| 426 | CPUs. Cayce Pollard Units. That's what Damien calls the clothing |
| 427 | she wears. CPUs are either black, white, or gray, and ideally |
| 428 | seem to have come into this world without human intervention. |
| 429 | |
| 430 | What people take for relentless minimalism is a side effect |
| 431 | of too much exposure to the reactor-cores of fashion. This |
| 432 | has resulted in a remorseless paring-down of what she can and |
| 433 | will wear. She is, literally, allergic to fashion. She can |
| 434 | only tolerate things that could have been worn, to a general |
| 435 | lack of comment, during any year between 1945 and 2000. She's a |
| 436 | design-free zone, a one-woman school of and whose very austerity |
| 437 | periodically threatens to spawn its own cult. |
| 438 | |
| 439 | =head2 v5.12.2-RC1 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition" |
| 440 | |
| 441 | L<Announced on 2010-08-31 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163670.html> |
| 442 | |
| 443 | The front page opens, familiar as a friend's living room. A frame-grab |
| 444 | from #48 serves as backdrop, dim and almost monochrome, no characters in |
| 445 | view. This is one of the sequences that generate comparisons with |
| 446 | Tarkovsky. She only knows Tarkovsky from stills, really, though she did |
| 447 | once fall asleep during a screening of The Stalker, going under on an |
| 448 | endless pan, the camera aimed straight down, in close-up, at a puddle on |
| 449 | a ruined mosaic floor. But she is not one of those who think that much |
| 450 | will be gained by analysis of the maker's imagined influences. The cult |
| 451 | of the footage is rife with subcults, claiming every possible influence. |
| 452 | Truffaut, Peckinpah -- The Peckinpah people, among the least likely, are |
| 453 | still waiting for the guns to be drawn. |
| 454 | |
| 455 | =head2 v5.12.1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle" |
| 456 | |
| 457 | L<Announced on 2010-05-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160109.html> |
| 458 | |
| 459 | "Now suppose," chortled Dr. Breed, enjoying himself, "that there were |
| 460 | many possible ways in which water could crystallize, could freeze. |
| 461 | Suppose that the sort of ice we skate upon and put into highballs -- |
| 462 | what we might call ice-one -- is only one of several types of ice. |
| 463 | Suppose water always froze as ice-one on Earth because it had never |
| 464 | had a seed to teach it how to form ice-two, ice-three, ice-four |
| 465 | ...? And suppose," he rapped on his desk with his old hand again, |
| 466 | "that there were one form, which we will call ice-nine -- a crystal as |
| 467 | hard as this desk -- with a melting point of, let us say, one-hundred |
| 468 | degrees Fahrenheit, or, better still, a melting point of one-hundred- |
| 469 | and-thirty degrees." |
| 470 | |
| 471 | =head2 v5.12.1-RC2 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle" |
| 472 | |
| 473 | L<Announced on 2010-05-13 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160066.html> |
| 474 | |
| 475 | San Lorenzo was fifty miles long and twenty miles wide, I learned from |
| 476 | the supplement to the New York Sunday Times. Its population was four |
| 477 | hundred, fifty thousand souls, "...all fiercely dedicated to the ideals |
| 478 | of the Free World." |
| 479 | |
| 480 | Its highest point, Mount McCabe, was eleven thousand feet above sea |
| 481 | level. Its capital was Bolivar, "...a strikingly modern city built on a |
| 482 | harbor capable of sheltering the entire United States Navy." The principal |
| 483 | exports were sugar, coffee, bananas, indigo, and handcrafted novelties. |
| 484 | |
| 485 | =head2 v5.12.1-RC1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle" |
| 486 | |
| 487 | L<Announced on 2010-05-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg159971.html> |
| 488 | |
| 489 | Which brings me to the Bokononist concept of a wampeter. A wampeter is |
| 490 | the pivot of a karass. No karass is without a wampeter, Bokonon tells us, |
| 491 | just as no wheel is without a hub. Anything can be a wampeter: a tree, |
| 492 | a rock, an animal, an idea, a book, a melody, the Holy Grail. Whatever |
| 493 | it is, the members of its karass revolve about it in the majestic chaos |
| 494 | of a spiral nebula. The orbits of the members of a karass about their |
| 495 | common wampeter are spiritual orbits, naturally. It is souls and not |
| 496 | bodies that revolve. As Bokonon invites us to sing: |
| 497 | |
| 498 | Around and around and around we spin, |
| 499 | With feet of lead and wings of tin . . . |
| 500 | |
| 501 | =head2 v5.12.0 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
| 502 | |
| 503 | L<Announced on 2010-04-12 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158820.html> |
| 504 | |
| 505 | 'Please would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, for she was |
| 506 | not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, 'why |
| 507 | your cat grins like that?' |
| 508 | |
| 509 | 'It's a Cheshire cat,' said the Duchess, 'and that's why. Pig!' |
| 510 | |
| 511 | She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite |
| 512 | jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby, |
| 513 | and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:-- |
| 514 | |
| 515 | 'I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know |
| 516 | that cats COULD grin.' |
| 517 | |
| 518 | 'They all can,' said the Duchess; 'and most of 'em do.' |
| 519 | |
| 520 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC5 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
| 521 | |
| 522 | L<Announced on 2010-04-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158720.html> |
| 523 | |
| 524 | 'Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly; 'some of the words |
| 525 | have got altered.' |
| 526 | |
| 527 | 'It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar decidedly, and |
| 528 | there was silence for some minutes. |
| 529 | |
| 530 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
| 531 | |
| 532 | L<Announced on 2010-04-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158567.html> |
| 533 | |
| 534 | 'It was much pleasanter at home,' thought poor Alice, 'when one wasn't |
| 535 | always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and |
| 536 | rabbits. I almost wish I hadn't gone down that rabbit-hole--and yet--and |
| 537 | yet--it's rather curious, you know, this sort of life! I do wonder what |
| 538 | can have happened to me! When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that |
| 539 | kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one! |
| 540 | |
| 541 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC3 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
| 542 | |
| 543 | L<Announced on 2010-04-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158346.html> |
| 544 | |
| 545 | At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them, |
| 546 | called out, 'Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL soon make you |
| 547 | dry enough!' They all sat down at once, in a large ring, with the Mouse |
| 548 | in the middle. Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt |
| 549 | sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon. |
| 550 | |
| 551 | 'Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, 'are you all ready? This |
| 552 | is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! "William |
| 553 | the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was soon submitted |
| 554 | to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of late much |
| 555 | accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of |
| 556 | Mercia and Northumbria --"' |
| 557 | |
| 558 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC2 - no announcement |
| 559 | |
| 560 | Available on CPAN since 2010-04-01. |
| 561 | |
| 562 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
| 563 | |
| 564 | L<Announced on 2010-03-29 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg158060.html> |
| 565 | |
| 566 | So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the |
| 567 | hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of |
| 568 | making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and |
| 569 | picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran |
| 570 | close by her. |
| 571 | |
| 572 | There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice think it so |
| 573 | VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, 'Oh dear! Oh |
| 574 | dear! I shall be late!' (when she thought it over afterwards, it |
| 575 | occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this, but at the time |
| 576 | it all seemed quite natural); but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH |
| 577 | OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on, |
| 578 | Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had |
| 579 | never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to |
| 580 | take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the field |
| 581 | after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large |
| 582 | rabbit-hole under the hedge. |
| 583 | |
| 584 | In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how |
| 585 | in the world she was to get out again. |
| 586 | |
| 587 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC0 - no epigraph |
| 588 | |
| 589 | L<Announced on 2020-03-21 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg157761.html> |
| 590 | |
| 591 | =head2 v5.11.5 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "Christabel" |
| 592 | |
| 593 | L<Announced on 2010-02-21 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/02/msg156957.html> |
| 594 | |
| 595 | A little child, a limber elf, |
| 596 | Singing, dancing to itself, |
| 597 | A fairy thing with red round cheeks, |
| 598 | That always finds, and never seeks, |
| 599 | Makes such a vision to the sight |
| 600 | As fills a father's eyes with light; |
| 601 | And pleasures flow in so thick and fast |
| 602 | Upon his heart, that he at last |
| 603 | Must needs express his love's excess |
| 604 | With words of unmeant bitterness. |
| 605 | Perhaps 'tis pretty to force together |
| 606 | Thoughts so all unlike each other; |
| 607 | To mutter and mock a broken charm, |
| 608 | To dally with wrong that does no harm. |
| 609 | Perhaps 'tis tender too and pretty |
| 610 | At each wild word to feel within |
| 611 | A sweet recoil of love and pity. |
| 612 | And what, if in a world of sin |
| 613 | (O sorrow and shame should this be true!) |
| 614 | Such giddiness of heart and brain |
| 615 | Comes seldom save from rage and pain, |
| 616 | So talks as it's most used to do. |
| 617 | |
| 618 | =head2 v5.11.4 - Fyodor Dostoevsky, "Crime and Punishment" |
| 619 | |
| 620 | L<Announced on 2010-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/01/msg155848.html> |
| 621 | |
| 622 | And you don't suppose that I went into it headlong like a fool? I went |
| 623 | into it like a wise man, and that was just my destruction. And you |
| 624 | mustn't suppose that I didn't know, for instance, that if I began to |
| 625 | question myself whether I had the right to gain power -- I certainly |
| 626 | hadn't the right -- or that if I asked myself whether a human being is a |
| 627 | louse it proved that it wasn't so for me, though it might be for a man |
| 628 | who would go straight to his goal without asking questions.... If I |
| 629 | worried myself all those days, wondering whether Napoleon would have |
| 630 | done it or not, I felt clearly of course that I wasn't Napoleon. |
| 631 | |
| 632 | =head2 v5.11.3 - Mark Twain, "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer" |
| 633 | |
| 634 | L<Announced on 2009-12-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/12/msg154838.html> |
| 635 | |
| 636 | "Say -- I'm going in a swimming, I am. Don't you wish you could? But of |
| 637 | course you'd druther work -- wouldn't you? Course you would!" |
| 638 | |
| 639 | Tom contemplated the boy a bit, and said: "What do you call work?" |
| 640 | |
| 641 | "Why ain't that work?" |
| 642 | |
| 643 | Tom resumed his whitewashing, and answered carelessly: "Well, maybe it |
| 644 | is, and maybe it aint. All I know, is, it suits Tom Sawyer." |
| 645 | |
| 646 | "Oh come, now, you don't mean to let on that you like it?" |
| 647 | |
| 648 | The brush continued to move. "Like it? Well I don't see why I oughtn't |
| 649 | to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?" |
| 650 | |
| 651 | That put the thing in a new light. Ben stopped nibbling his apple. Tom |
| 652 | swept his brush daintily back and forth -- stepped back to note the effect |
| 653 | -- added a touch here and there-criticised the effect again -- Ben |
| 654 | watching every move and getting more and more interested, more and more |
| 655 | absorbed. Presently he said: "Say, Tom, let me whitewash a little." |
| 656 | |
| 657 | =head2 v5.11.2 - Michael Marshall Smith, "Only Forward" |
| 658 | |
| 659 | L<Announced on 2009-11-20 by |http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/11/msg153646.html> |
| 660 | |
| 661 | The streets were pretty quiet, which was nice. They're always quiet here |
| 662 | at that time: you have to be wearing a black jacket to be out on the |
| 663 | streets between seven and nine in the evening, and not many people in |
| 664 | the area have black jackets. It's just one of those things. I currently |
| 665 | live in Colour Neighbourhood, which is for people who are heavily into |
| 666 | colour. All the streets and buildings are set for instant colourmatch: |
| 667 | as you walk down the road they change hue to offset whatever you're |
| 668 | wearing. When the streets are busy it's kind of intense, and anyone |
| 669 | prone to epileptic seizures isn't allowed to live in the Neighbourhood, |
| 670 | however much they're into colour. |
| 671 | |
| 672 | =head2 v5.11.1 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22" |
| 673 | |
| 674 | L<Announced on 2009-10-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg152360.html> |
| 675 | |
| 676 | Milo had been caught red-handed in the act of plundering his countrymen, |
| 677 | and, as a result, his stock had never been higher. He proved good as his |
| 678 | word when a rawboned major from Minnesota curled his lip in rebellious |
| 679 | disavowal and demanded his share of the syndicate Milo kept saying |
| 680 | everybody owned. Milo met the challenge by writing the words "A Share" |
| 681 | on the nearest scrap of paper and handing it away with a virtuous disdain |
| 682 | that won the envy and admiration of almost everyone who knew him. His |
| 683 | glory was at a peak, and Colonel Cathcart, who knew and admired his |
| 684 | war record, was astonished by the deferential humility with which Mil |
| 685 | presented himself at Group Headquarters and made his fantastic appeal |
| 686 | for more hazardous assignment. |
| 687 | |
| 688 | =head2 v5.11.0 - Mikhail Bulgakov, "The Master and Margarita" |
| 689 | |
| 690 | L<Announced on 2009-10-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg151376.html> |
| 691 | |
| 692 | Whispers of an "evil power" were heard in lines at dairy shops, in |
| 693 | streetcars, stores, arguments, kitchens, suburban and long-distance |
| 694 | trains, at stations large and small, in dachas and on beaches. Needless |
| 695 | to say, truly mature and cultured people did not tell these stories |
| 696 | about an evil power's visit to the capital. In fact, they even made fun |
| 697 | of them and tried to talk sense into those who told them. Nevertheless, |
| 698 | facts are facts, as they say, and cannot simply be dismissed without |
| 699 | explanation: somebody had visited the capital. The charred cinders of |
| 700 | Griboyedov alone, and many other things besides, confirmed it. Cultured |
| 701 | people shared the point of view of the investigating team: it was the |
| 702 | work of a gang of hypnotists and ventriloquists magnificently skilled in |
| 703 | their art. |
| 704 | |
| 705 | =head2 v5.10.1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister" |
| 706 | |
| 707 | L<Announced on 2009-09-23 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150172.html> |
| 708 | |
| 709 | 'Briefly, sir, I am the Permanent Under-Secretary of State, known as |
| 710 | the Permanent Secretary. Woolley here is your Principal Private |
| 711 | Secretary. I, too, have a Principal Private Secretary, and he is the |
| 712 | Principal Private Secretary to the Permanent Secretary. Directly |
| 713 | responsible to me are ten Deputy Secretaries, eighty-seven Under |
| 714 | Secretaries and two hundred and nineteen Assistant Secretaries. |
| 715 | Directly responsible to the Principal Private Secretaries are plain |
| 716 | Private Secretaries. The Prime Minister will be appointing two |
| 717 | Parliamentary Under-Secretaries and you will be appointing your own |
| 718 | Parliamentary Private Secretary.' |
| 719 | |
| 720 | 'Can they all type?' I joked. |
| 721 | |
| 722 | 'None of us can type, Minister,' replied Sir Humphrey smoothly. 'Mrs |
| 723 | McKay types - she is your Secretary.' |
| 724 | |
| 725 | I couldn't tell whether or not he was joking. 'What a pity,' I said. |
| 726 | 'We could have opened an agency.' |
| 727 | |
| 728 | Sir Humphrey and Bernard laughed. 'Very droll, sir,' said Sir |
| 729 | Humphrey. 'Most amusing, sir,' said Bernard. Were they genuinely |
| 730 | amused at my wit, or just being rather patronising? 'I suppose they |
| 731 | all say that, do they?' I ventured. |
| 732 | |
| 733 | Sir Humphrey reassured me on that. 'Certainly not, Minister,' he |
| 734 | replied. 'Not quite all.' |
| 735 | |
| 736 | =head2 v5.10.1-RC2 - no epigraph |
| 737 | |
| 738 | L<Announced on 2009-08-18 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150015.html> |
| 739 | |
| 740 | =head2 v5.10.1-RC1 - no epigraph |
| 741 | |
| 742 | L<Announced on 2009-08-06 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg149498.html> |
| 743 | |
| 744 | =head2 v5.10.0 - Laurence Sterne, "Tristram Shandy" |
| 745 | |
| 746 | L<Announced on 2007-12-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/12/msg131636.html> |
| 747 | |
| 748 | He would often declare, in speaking his thoughts upon the subject, that |
| 749 | he did not conceive how the greatest family in England could stand it |
| 750 | out against an uninterrupted succession of six or seven short |
| 751 | noses.--And for the contrary reason, he would generally add, That it |
| 752 | must be one of the greatest problems in civil life, where the same |
| 753 | number of long and jolly noses, following one another in a direct line, |
| 754 | did not raise and hoist it up into the best vacancies in the kingdom. |
| 755 | |
| 756 | =head2 v5.10.0-RC2 - no epigraph |
| 757 | |
| 758 | L<Announced on 2007-11-25 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130978.html> |
| 759 | |
| 760 | =head2 v5.10.0-RC1 - no epigraph |
| 761 | |
| 762 | L<Announced on 2007-11-17 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130653.html> |
| 763 | |
| 764 | =head2 v5.9.5 - no announcement |
| 765 | |
| 766 | L<Pre-announced on 2007-07-07 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/07/msg126358.html>, |
| 767 | available on CPAN with same date, but never actually announced. |
| 768 | |
| 769 | =head2 v5.9.4 - no epigraph |
| 770 | |
| 771 | L<Announced on 2006-08-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/08/msg115782.html> |
| 772 | |
| 773 | =head2 v5.9.3 - no epigraph |
| 774 | |
| 775 | L<Announced on 2006-01-28 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg109086.html> |
| 776 | |
| 777 | =head2 v5.9.2 - Thomas Pynchon, "V" |
| 778 | |
| 779 | L<Announced on 2005-04-01 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20050401150702.2b4a70d5@grubert.mandrakesoft.com> |
| 780 | |
| 781 | This word flip was weird. Every recording date of McClintic's he'd |
| 782 | gotten into the habit of talking electricity with the audio men and |
| 783 | technicians of the studio. McClintic once couldn't have cared less |
| 784 | about electricity, but now it seemed if that was helping him reach a |
| 785 | bigger audience, some digging, some who would never dig, but all |
| 786 | paying and those royalties keeping the Triumph in gas and McClintic |
| 787 | in J. Press suits, then McClintic ought to be grateful to |
| 788 | electricity, ought maybe to learn a little more about it. So he'd |
| 789 | picked up some here and there, and one day last summer he got around |
| 790 | to talking stochastic music and digital computers with one |
| 791 | technician. Out of the conversation had come Set/Reset, which was |
| 792 | getting to be a signature for the group. He had found out from this |
| 793 | sound man about a two-triode circuit called a flip-flop, which when |
| 794 | it turned on could be one of two ways, depending on which tube was |
| 795 | conducting and which was cut off: set or reset, flip or flop. |
| 796 | |
| 797 | "And that," the man said, "can be yes or no, or one or zero. And |
| 798 | that is what you might call one of the basic units, or specialized |
| 799 | `cells' in a big `electronic brain.' " |
| 800 | |
| 801 | "Crazy," said McClintic, having lost him back there someplace. But |
| 802 | one thing that did occur to him was if a computer's brain could go |
| 803 | flip or flop, why so could a musician's. As long as you were flop, |
| 804 | everything was cool. But where did the trigger-pulse come from to |
| 805 | make you flip? |
| 806 | |
| 807 | =head2 v5.9.1 - Tom Stoppard, "Arcadia" |
| 808 | |
| 809 | L<Announced on 2004-03-16 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/8587d77c565f2d43> |
| 810 | |
| 811 | Aren't you supposed to have a pony? |
| 812 | |
| 813 | =head2 v5.9.0 - Doris Lessing, "Martha Quest" |
| 814 | |
| 815 | L<Announced on 2003-10-27 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/63a8c34385de82a1> |
| 816 | |
| 817 | What of October, that ambiguous month |
| 818 | |
| 819 | =head2 v5.8.9 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister" |
| 820 | |
| 821 | L<Announced on 2008-12-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/12/msg142571.html> |
| 822 | |
| 823 | Frank and I, unlike the civil servants, were still puzzled that such a |
| 824 | proposal as the Europass could even be seriously under consideration by |
| 825 | the FCO. We can both see clearly that it is wonderful ammunition for the |
| 826 | anti-Europeans. I asked Humphrey if the Foreign Office doesn't realise |
| 827 | how damaging this would be to the European ideal? |
| 828 | |
| 829 | 'I'm sure they do, Minister, he said. That's why they support it.' |
| 830 | |
| 831 | This was even more puzzling, since I'd always been under the impression |
| 832 | that the FO is pro-Europe. 'Is it or isn't it?' I asked Humphrey. |
| 833 | |
| 834 | 'Yes and no,' he replied of course, 'if you'll pardon the |
| 835 | expression. The Foreign Office is pro-Europe because it is really |
| 836 | anti-Europe. In fact the Civil Service was united in its desire to make |
| 837 | sure the Common Market didn't work. That's why we went into it.' |
| 838 | |
| 839 | This sounded like a riddle to me. I asked him to explain further. And |
| 840 | basically his argument was as follows: Britain has had the same foreign |
| 841 | policy objective for at least the last five hundred years - to create a |
| 842 | disunited Europe. In that cause we have fought with the Dutch against |
| 843 | the Spanish, with the Germans against the French, with the French and |
| 844 | Italians against the Germans, and with the French against the Italians |
| 845 | and Germans. [The Dutch rebellion against Phillip II of Spain, the |
| 846 | Napoleonic Wars, the First World War, and the Second World War - Ed.] |
| 847 | |
| 848 | In other words, divide and rule. And the Foreign Office can see no |
| 849 | reason to change when it has worked so well until now. |
| 850 | |
| 851 | I was aware of this, naturally, but I regarded it as ancient history. |
| 852 | Humphrey thinks that it is, in fact, current policy. It was necessary |
| 853 | for us to break up the EEC, he explained, so we had to get inside. We |
| 854 | had previously tried to break it up from the outside, but that didn't |
| 855 | work. [A reference to our futile and short-lived involvement in EFTA, |
| 856 | the European Free Trade Association, founded in 1960 and which the UK |
| 857 | left in 1972 - Ed.] Now that we're in, we are able to make a complete |
| 858 | pig's breakfast out of it. We've now set the Germans against the French, |
| 859 | the French against the Italians, the Italians against the Dutch... and |
| 860 | the Foreign office is terribly happy. It's just like old time. |
| 861 | |
| 862 | I was staggered by all of this. I thought that the all of us who are |
| 863 | publicly pro-European believed in the European ideal. I said this to Sir |
| 864 | Humphrey, and he simply chuckled. |
| 865 | |
| 866 | So I asked him: if we don't believe in the European Ideal, why are we |
| 867 | pushing to increase the membership? |
| 868 | |
| 869 | 'Same reason,' came the reply. 'It's just like the United Nations. The |
| 870 | more members it has, the more arguments you can stir up, and the more |
| 871 | futile and impotent it becomes.' |
| 872 | |
| 873 | This all strikes me as the most appalling cynicism, and I said so. |
| 874 | |
| 875 | Sir Humphrey agreed completely. 'Yes Minister. We call it |
| 876 | diplomacy. It's what made Britain great, you know.' |
| 877 | |
| 878 | =head2 v5.8.9-RC2 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister" |
| 879 | |
| 880 | L<Announced on 2008-12-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg142422.html> |
| 881 | |
| 882 | There was silence in the office. I didn't know what we were going to do |
| 883 | about the four hundred new people supervising our economy drive or the |
| 884 | four hundred new people for the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office, or |
| 885 | anything! I simply sat and waited and hoped that my head would stop |
| 886 | thumping and that some idea would be suggested by someone sometime soon. |
| 887 | |
| 888 | Sir Humphrey obliged. 'Minister... if we were to end the economy drive |
| 889 | and close the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office we could issue an immediate |
| 890 | press announcement that you had axed eight hundred jobs.' He had |
| 891 | obviously thought this out carefully in advance, for at this moment he |
| 892 | produced a slim folder from under his arm. 'If you'd like to approve |
| 893 | this draft...' |
| 894 | |
| 895 | I couldn't believe the impertinence of the suggestion. Axed eight |
| 896 | hundred jobs? 'But no one was ever doing these jobs,' I pointed out |
| 897 | incredulously. 'No one's been appointed yet.' |
| 898 | |
| 899 | 'Even greater economy,' he replied instantly. 'We've saved eight hundred |
| 900 | redundancy payments as well.' |
| 901 | |
| 902 | 'But...' I attempted to explain '... that's just phony. It's dishonest, |
| 903 | it's juggling with figures, it's pulling the wool over people's eyes.' |
| 904 | |
| 905 | 'A government press release, in fact.' said Humphrey. |
| 906 | |
| 907 | =head2 v5.8.9-RC1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister" |
| 908 | |
| 909 | L<Announced on 2008-11-10 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg141515.html> |
| 910 | |
| 911 | A jumbo jet touched down, with BURANDAN AIRWAYS written on the side. I |
| 912 | was hugely impressed. British Airways are having to pawn their Concordes, |
| 913 | and here is this little tiny African state with its own airline, jumbo |
| 914 | jets and all. |
| 915 | |
| 916 | I asked Bernard how many planes Burandan Airways had. 'None,' he said. |
| 917 | |
| 918 | I told him not to be silly and use his eyes. 'No Minister, it belongs to |
| 919 | Freddie Laker,' he said. 'They chartered it last week and repainted it |
| 920 | specially.' Apparently most of the Have-Nots (I mean, LDCs) do this - at |
| 921 | the opening of the UN General Assembly the runways of Kennedy Airport are |
| 922 | jam-packed with phoney flag-carriers. 'In fact,' said Bernard with a sly |
| 923 | grin, 'there was one 747 that belonged to nine different African airlines |
| 924 | in a month. They called it the mumbo-jumbo.' |
| 925 | |
| 926 | While we watched nothing much happening on the TV except the mumbo-jumbo |
| 927 | taxiing around Prestwick and the Queen looking a bit chilly, Bernard gave |
| 928 | me the next day's schedule and explained that I was booked on the night |
| 929 | sleeper from King's Cross to Edinburgh because I had to vote in a |
| 930 | three-line whip at the House tonight and would have to miss the last |
| 931 | plane. Then the commentator, in that special hushed BBC voice used for any |
| 932 | occasion with which Royalty is connected, announced reverentially that we |
| 933 | were about to catch our first glimpse of President Selim. |
| 934 | |
| 935 | And out of the plane stepped Charlie. My old friend Charlie Umtali. We |
| 936 | were at LSE together. Not Selim Mohammed at all, but Charlie. |
| 937 | |
| 938 | Bernard asked me if I were sure. Silly question. How could you forget a |
| 939 | name like Charlie Umtali? |
| 940 | |
| 941 | I sent Bernard for Sir Humphrey, who was delighted to hear that we now |
| 942 | know something about our official visitor. |
| 943 | |
| 944 | Bernard's official brief said nothing. Amazing! Amazing how little the FCO |
| 945 | has been able to find out. Perhaps they were hoping it would all be on the |
| 946 | car radio. All the brief says is that Colonel Selim Mohammed had converted |
| 947 | to Islam some years ago, they didn't know his original name, and therefore |
| 948 | knew little of his background. |
| 949 | |
| 950 | I was able to tell Humphrey and Bernard /all/ about his background. |
| 951 | Charlie was a red-hot political economist, I informed them. Got the top |
| 952 | first. Wiped the floor with everyone. |
| 953 | |
| 954 | Bernard seemed relieved. 'Well that's all right then.' |
| 955 | |
| 956 | 'Why?' I enquired. |
| 957 | |
| 958 | 'I think Bernard means,' said Sir Humphrey helpfully, 'that he'll know how |
| 959 | to behave if he was at an English University. Even if it was the LSE.' I |
| 960 | never know whether or not Humphrey is insulting me intentionally. |
| 961 | |
| 962 | Humphrey was concerned about Charlie's political colour. 'When you said |
| 963 | that he was red-hot, were you speaking politically?' |
| 964 | |
| 965 | In a way I was. 'The thing about Charlie is that you never quite know |
| 966 | where you are with him. He's the sort of chap who follows you into a |
| 967 | revolving door and comes out in front.' |
| 968 | |
| 969 | 'No deeply held convictions?' asked Sir Humphrey. |
| 970 | |
| 971 | 'No. The only thing Charlie was committed too was Charlie.' |
| 972 | |
| 973 | 'Ah, I see. A politician, Minister.' |
| 974 | |
| 975 | =head2 v5.8.8 - Joe Raposo, "Bein' Green" |
| 976 | |
| 977 | L<Announced on 2006-02-01 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/28caf52e41ebe723> |
| 978 | |
| 979 | It's not that easy bein' green |
| 980 | Having to spend each day the color of the leaves |
| 981 | When I think it could be nicer being red or yellow or gold |
| 982 | Or something much more colorful like that |
| 983 | |
| 984 | It's not easy bein' green |
| 985 | It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things |
| 986 | And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're |
| 987 | Not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water |
| 988 | Or stars in the sky |
| 989 | |
| 990 | But green's the color of Spring |
| 991 | And green can be cool and friendly-like |
| 992 | And green can be big like an ocean |
| 993 | Or important like a mountain |
| 994 | Or tall like a tree |
| 995 | |
| 996 | When green is all there is to be |
| 997 | It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why? |
| 998 | Wonder I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful |
| 999 | And I think it's what I want to be |
| 1000 | |
| 1001 | =head2 v5.8.8-RC1 - Cosgrove Hall Productions, "Dangermouse" |
| 1002 | |
| 1003 | L<Announced on 2006-01-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/d231fc554af8cc51> |
| 1004 | |
| 1005 | Greenback: And the world is mine, all mine. Muhahahahaha. See to it! |
| 1006 | |
| 1007 | Stiletto: Si, Barone. Subito, Barone. |
| 1008 | |
| 1009 | =head2 v5.8.7 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf" |
| 1010 | |
| 1011 | L<Announced on 2005-05-31 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9a545704a0062f16> |
| 1012 | |
| 1013 | And now, imagine the triumphant procession: Peter at the head; after him the |
| 1014 | hunters leading the wolf; and winding up the procession, grandfather and the |
| 1015 | cat. |
| 1016 | |
| 1017 | Grandfather shook his head discontentedly: "Well, and if Peter hadn't caught |
| 1018 | the wolf? What then?" |
| 1019 | |
| 1020 | =head2 v5.8.7-RC1 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf" |
| 1021 | |
| 1022 | L<Announced on 2005-05-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/05/msg100711.html> |
| 1023 | |
| 1024 | And now this is how things stood: The cat was sitting on one branch. The |
| 1025 | bird on another, not too close to the cat. And the wolf walked round and |
| 1026 | round the tree, looking at them with greedy eyes. |
| 1027 | |
| 1028 | In the meantime, Peter, without the slightest fear, stood behind the |
| 1029 | gate, watching all that was going on. He ran home,got a strong rope and |
| 1030 | climbed up the high stone wall. |
| 1031 | |
| 1032 | One of the branches of the tree, around which the wolf was walking, |
| 1033 | stretched out over the wall. |
| 1034 | |
| 1035 | Grabbing hold of the branch, Peter lightly climbed over on to the tree. |
| 1036 | Peter said to the bird: "Fly down and circle round the wolf's head, only |
| 1037 | take care that he doesn't catch you!". |
| 1038 | |
| 1039 | The bird almost touched the wolf's head with its wings, while the wolf |
| 1040 | snapped angrily at him from this side and that. |
| 1041 | |
| 1042 | How that bird teased the wolf, how that wolf wanted to catch him! But |
| 1043 | the bird was clever and the wolf simply couldn't do anything about it. |
| 1044 | |
| 1045 | =head2 v5.8.6 - A. A. Milne, "The House at Pooh Corner" |
| 1046 | |
| 1047 | L<Announced on 2004-11-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20041128000836.GA304@Bagpuss.unfortu.net> |
| 1048 | |
| 1049 | "Hallo, Pooh," said Piglet, giving a jump of surprise. "I knew it was |
| 1050 | you." |
| 1051 | |
| 1052 | "So did I,", said Pooh. "What are you doing?" |
| 1053 | |
| 1054 | "I'm planting a haycorn, Pooh, so that it can grow up into an oak-tree, |
| 1055 | and have lots of haycorns just outside the front door instead of having |
| 1056 | to walk miles and miles, do you see, Pooh?" |
| 1057 | |
| 1058 | "Supposing it doesn't?" said Pooh. |
| 1059 | |
| 1060 | "It will, because Christopher Robin says it will, so that's why I'm |
| 1061 | planting it." |
| 1062 | |
| 1063 | "Well," aid Pooh, "if I plant a honeycomb outside my house, then it will |
| 1064 | grow up into a beehive." |
| 1065 | |
| 1066 | Piglet wasn't quite sure about this. |
| 1067 | |
| 1068 | "Or a /piece/ of a honeycomb," said Pooh, "so as not to waste too much. |
| 1069 | Only then I might only get a piece of a beehive, and it might be the |
| 1070 | wrong piece, where the bees were buzzing and not hunnying. Bother" |
| 1071 | |
| 1072 | Piglet agreed that that would be rather bothering. |
| 1073 | |
| 1074 | "Besides, Pooh, it's a very difficult thing, planting unless you know |
| 1075 | how to do it," he said; and he put the acorn in the hole he had made, |
| 1076 | and covered it up with earth, and jumped on it. |
| 1077 | |
| 1078 | =head2 v5.8.6-RC1 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie the Pooh" |
| 1079 | |
| 1080 | L<Announced on 2004-11-11 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/11/msg95786.html> |
| 1081 | |
| 1082 | "Hallo!" said Piglet, "whare are /you/ doing?" |
| 1083 | |
| 1084 | "Hunting," said Pooh. |
| 1085 | |
| 1086 | "Hunting what?" |
| 1087 | |
| 1088 | "Tracking something," said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously. |
| 1089 | |
| 1090 | "Tracking what?" said Piglet, coming closer. |
| 1091 | |
| 1092 | "That's just what I ask myself, I ask myself, What?" |
| 1093 | |
| 1094 | "What do you think you'll answer?" |
| 1095 | |
| 1096 | "I shall have to wait until I catch up with it," said Winnie-the-Pooh. |
| 1097 | "Now, look there." He pointed to the ground in front of him. "What do |
| 1098 | you see there?" |
| 1099 | |
| 1100 | "Track," said Piglet. "Paw-marks." He gave a little squeak of |
| 1101 | excitement. "Oh, Pooh!" Do you think it's a--a--a Woozle?" |
| 1102 | |
| 1103 | =head2 v5.8.5 - wikipedia, "Yew" |
| 1104 | |
| 1105 | L<Announced on 2004-07-19 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/68340e2e4c39222c> |
| 1106 | |
| 1107 | Yews are relatively slow growing trees, widely used in landscaping and |
| 1108 | ornamental horticulture. They have flat, dark-green needles, reddish |
| 1109 | bark, and bear seeds with red arils, which are eaten by thrushes, |
| 1110 | waxwings and other birds, dispersing the hard seeds undamaged in their |
| 1111 | droppings. Yew wood is reddish brown (with white sapwood), and very |
| 1112 | hard. It was traditionally used to make bows, especially the English |
| 1113 | longbow. |
| 1114 | |
| 1115 | In England, the Common Yew (Taxus baccata, also known as English Yew) is |
| 1116 | often found in churchyards. It is sometimes suggested that these are |
| 1117 | placed there as a symbol of long life or trees of death, and some are |
| 1118 | likely to be over 3,000 years old. It is also suggested that yew trees |
| 1119 | may have a pre-Christian association with old pagan holy sites, and the |
| 1120 | Christian church found it expedient to use and take over existing sites. |
| 1121 | Another explanation is that the poisonous berries and foliage discourage |
| 1122 | farmers and drovers from letting their animals wander into the burial |
| 1123 | grounds. The yew tree is a frequent symbol in the Christian poetry of |
| 1124 | T.S. Eliot, especially his Four Quartets. |
| 1125 | |
| 1126 | =head2 v5.8.5-RC2 - wikipedia, "Beech" |
| 1127 | |
| 1128 | L<Announced on 2004-07-09 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/f92175725af7a5ad> |
| 1129 | |
| 1130 | Beeches are trees of the Genus Fagus, family Fagaceae, including about |
| 1131 | ten species in Europe, Asia, and North America. The leaves are entire or |
| 1132 | sparsely toothed. The fruit is a small, sharply-angled nut, borne in |
| 1133 | pairs in spiny husks. The beech most commonly grown as an ornamental or |
| 1134 | shade tree is the European beech (Fagus sylvatica). |
| 1135 | |
| 1136 | The southern beeches belong to a different but related genus, |
| 1137 | Nothofagus. They are found in Australia, New Zealand, New Guinea, New |
| 1138 | Caledonia and South America. |
| 1139 | |
| 1140 | =head2 v5.8.5-RC1 - wikipedia, "Pedunculate Oak" (abridged) |
| 1141 | |
| 1142 | L<Announced on 2004-07-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/ca6ce4a7ed9f219c?pli=1> |
| 1143 | |
| 1144 | The Pedunculate Oak is called the Common Oak in Britain, and is also |
| 1145 | often called the English Oak in other English speaking countries It is a |
| 1146 | large deciduous tree to 25-35m tall (exceptionally to 40m), with lobed |
| 1147 | and sessile (stalk-less) leaves. Flowering takes place in early to mid |
| 1148 | spring, and their fruit, called "acorns", ripen by autumn of the same |
| 1149 | year. The acorns are pedunculate (having a peduncle or acorn-stalk) and |
| 1150 | may occur singly, or several acorns may occur on a stalk. |
| 1151 | |
| 1152 | It forms a long-lived tree, with a large widespreading head of rugged |
| 1153 | branches. While it may naturally live to an age of a few centuries, many |
| 1154 | of the oldest trees are pollarded or coppiced, both pruning techniques |
| 1155 | that extend the tree's potential lifespan, if not its health. |
| 1156 | |
| 1157 | Within its native range it is valued for its importance to insects and |
| 1158 | other wildlife. Numerous insects live on the leaves, buds, and in the |
| 1159 | acorns. The acorns form a valuable food resource for several small |
| 1160 | mammals and some birds, notably Jays Garrulus glandarius. |
| 1161 | |
| 1162 | It is planted for forestry, and produces a long-lasting and durable |
| 1163 | heartwood, much in demand for interior and furniture work. |
| 1164 | |
| 1165 | =head2 v5.8.4 - T. S. Eliot, "The Old Gumbie Cat" |
| 1166 | |
| 1167 | L<Announced on 2004-04-22 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/c7333acf03ef4015> |
| 1168 | |
| 1169 | I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots; |
| 1170 | The curtain-cord she likes to wind, and tie it into sailor-knots. |
| 1171 | She sits upon the window-sill, or anything that's smooth and flat: |
| 1172 | She sits and sits and sits and sits -- and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat! |
| 1173 | |
| 1174 | But when the day's hustle and bustle is done, |
| 1175 | Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun. |
| 1176 | She thinks that the cockroaches just need employment |
| 1177 | To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment. |
| 1178 | So she's formed, from that a lot of disorderly louts, |
| 1179 | A troop of well-disciplined helpful boy-scouts, |
| 1180 | With a purpose in life and a good deed to do-- |
| 1181 | And she's even created a Beetles' Tattoo. |
| 1182 | |
| 1183 | So for Old Gumbie Cats let us now give three cheers -- |
| 1184 | On whom well-ordered households depend, it appears. |
| 1185 | |
| 1186 | |
| 1187 | =head2 v5.8.4-RC2 - T. S. Eliot, "Macavity: The Mystery Cat" |
| 1188 | |
| 1189 | L<Announced on 2004-04-16 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/84f6fdd73cc56a1b> |
| 1190 | |
| 1191 | Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw -- |
| 1192 | For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law. |
| 1193 | He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair: |
| 1194 | For when they reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/! |
| 1195 | |
| 1196 | Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity, |
| 1197 | He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity. |
| 1198 | His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare, |
| 1199 | And when you reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/! |
| 1200 | You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air -- |
| 1201 | But I tell you once and once again, /Macavity's not there/! |
| 1202 | |
| 1203 | =head2 v5.8.4-RC1 - T. S. Eliot, "Skimbleshanks: The Railway Cat" |
| 1204 | |
| 1205 | L<Announced on 2004-04-05 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e500353440769ebf> |
| 1206 | |
| 1207 | There's a whisper down the line at 11.39 |
| 1208 | When the Night Mail's ready to depart, |
| 1209 | Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble has he gone to hunt the thimble? |
| 1210 | We must find him of the train can't start.' |
| 1211 | All the guards and all the porters and the stationmaster's daughters |
| 1212 | They are searching high and low, |
| 1213 | Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble for unless he's very nimble |
| 1214 | Then the Night Mail just can't go' |
| 1215 | At 11.42 then the signal's overdue |
| 1216 | And the passengers are frantic to a man-- |
| 1217 | Then Skimble will appear and he'll saunter to the rear: |
| 1218 | He's been busy in the luggage van! |
| 1219 | He gives one flash of his glass-green eyes |
| 1220 | And the the signal goes 'All Clear!' |
| 1221 | And we're off at last of the northern part |
| 1222 | Of the Northern Hemisphere! |
| 1223 | |
| 1224 | =head2 v5.8.3 - Arthur William Edgar O'Shaugnessy, "Ode" |
| 1225 | |
| 1226 | L<Announced on 2004-01-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/968fb8d71e23af69> |
| 1227 | |
| 1228 | We are the music makers, |
| 1229 | And we are the dreamers of dreams, |
| 1230 | Wandering by lonely sea-breakers, |
| 1231 | And sitting by desolate streams; -- |
| 1232 | World-losers and world-forsakers, |
| 1233 | On whom the pale moon gleams: |
| 1234 | Yet we are the movers and shakers |
| 1235 | Of the world for ever, it seems. |
| 1236 | |
| 1237 | =head2 v5.8.3-RC1 - Irving Berlin, "Let's Face the Music and Dance" |
| 1238 | |
| 1239 | L<Announced on 2004-01-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/5ced50bebcd11c96> |
| 1240 | |
| 1241 | There may be trouble ahead, |
| 1242 | But while there's music and moonlight, |
| 1243 | And love and romance, |
| 1244 | Let's face the music and dance. |
| 1245 | |
| 1246 | Before the fiddlers have fled, |
| 1247 | Before they ask us to pay the bill, |
| 1248 | And while we still have that chance, |
| 1249 | Let's face the music and dance. |
| 1250 | |
| 1251 | Soon, we'll be without the moon, |
| 1252 | Humming a different tune, and then, |
| 1253 | |
| 1254 | There may be teardrops to shed, |
| 1255 | So while there's music and moonlight, |
| 1256 | And love and romance, |
| 1257 | Let's face the music and dance. |
| 1258 | |
| 1259 | =head2 v5.8.2 - Walt Whitman, "Passage to India" |
| 1260 | |
| 1261 | L<Announced on 2003-11-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/4714574f93967673> |
| 1262 | |
| 1263 | Passage, immediate passage! the blood burns in my veins! |
| 1264 | Away O soul! hoist instantly the anchor! |
| 1265 | Cut the hawsers - hall out - shake out every sail! |
| 1266 | Have we not stood here like trees in the ground long enough? |
| 1267 | Have we not grovel'd here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes? |
| 1268 | Have we not darken'd and dazed ourselves with books long enough? |
| 1269 | |
| 1270 | Sail forth - steer for the deep waters only, |
| 1271 | Reckless O soul, exploring, I with the and thou with me, |
| 1272 | For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go, |
| 1273 | And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all. |
| 1274 | |
| 1275 | O my brave soul! |
| 1276 | O farther farther sail! |
| 1277 | O daring job, but safe! are they not all the seas of God? |
| 1278 | O farther, farther, farther sail! |
| 1279 | |
| 1280 | =head2 v5.8.2-RC2 - Eric Idle/John Du Prez, "Accountancy Shanty" |
| 1281 | |
| 1282 | L<Announced on 2003-11-03 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/7669de5804b792f6> |
| 1283 | |
| 1284 | It's fun to charter an accountant |
| 1285 | And sail the wide accountan-cy, |
| 1286 | To find, explore the funds offshore |
| 1287 | And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy. |
| 1288 | |
| 1289 | =head2 v5.8.2-RC1 - Edward Lear, "The Jumblies" |
| 1290 | |
| 1291 | L<Announced on 2003-10-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83680ef3bbf7378d> |
| 1292 | |
| 1293 | They went to sea in a Sieve, they did, |
| 1294 | In a Sieve they went to sea: |
| 1295 | In spite of all their friends could say, |
| 1296 | On a winter's morn, on a stormy day, |
| 1297 | In a Sieve they went to sea! |
| 1298 | And when the Sieve turned round and round, |
| 1299 | And everyone cried, "You'll all be drowned!" |
| 1300 | They cried aloud, "Our Sieve ain't big, |
| 1301 | But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig! |
| 1302 | In a Sieve we'll go to sea!" |
| 1303 | |
| 1304 | Far and few, far and few, |
| 1305 | Are the lands where the Jumblies live; |
| 1306 | Their heads are green, and their hands are blue, |
| 1307 | And they went to sea in a Sieve. |
| 1308 | |
| 1309 | =head2 v5.8.1 - epigraph same as v5.7.1 |
| 1310 | |
| 1311 | L<Announced on 2003-09-25 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82678.html> |
| 1312 | |
| 1313 | =head2 v5.8.1-RC5 - Terry Pratchett, "Lords and Ladies" |
| 1314 | |
| 1315 | L<Announced on 2003-09-22 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82476.html> |
| 1316 | |
| 1317 | No matter what she did with her hair it took about |
| 1318 | three minutes for it to tangle itself up again, |
| 1319 | like a garden hosepipe in a shed [Footnote: Which, |
| 1320 | no matter how carefully coiled, will always uncoil |
| 1321 | overnight and tie the lawnmower to the bicycles]. |
| 1322 | |
| 1323 | =head2 v5.8.1-RC4 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times" |
| 1324 | |
| 1325 | L<Announced on 2003-08-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/08/msg79184.html> |
| 1326 | |
| 1327 | Grand Viziers were /always/ scheming megalomaniacs. |
| 1328 | It was probably in the job description: "Are you a |
| 1329 | devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good, |
| 1330 | then you can be my most trusted minister." |
| 1331 | |
| 1332 | =head2 v5.8.1-RC3 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times" |
| 1333 | |
| 1334 | L<Announced on 2003-07-30 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg79048.html> |
| 1335 | |
| 1336 | Lord Hong had a mind like a knife, although possibly |
| 1337 | a knife with a curved blade. |
| 1338 | |
| 1339 | =head2 v5.8.1-RC2 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times" |
| 1340 | |
| 1341 | L<Announced on 2003-07-11 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78102.html> |
| 1342 | |
| 1343 | Many an ancient lord's last words had been, "You can't kill |
| 1344 | me because I've got magic aaargh." |
| 1345 | |
| 1346 | =head2 v5.8.1-RC1 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times" |
| 1347 | |
| 1348 | L<Announced on 2003-07-10 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78009.html> |
| 1349 | |
| 1350 | Cohen was familiar with city gates. He'd broken down a number |
| 1351 | in his time, by battering ram, siege gun, and on one occasion |
| 1352 | with his head. |
| 1353 | |
| 1354 | But the gates of Hunghung were pretty damn good gates. They |
| 1355 | weren't like the gates of Ankh-Morpork, which were usually wide |
| 1356 | open to attract the spending customer and whose concession to |
| 1357 | defense was the sign "Thank You For Not Attacking Our City. |
| 1358 | Bonum Diem." These things were big and made of metal and there |
| 1359 | was a guardhouse and a squad of unhelpful men in black armor. |
| 1360 | |
| 1361 | =head2 v5.8.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man" |
| 1362 | |
| 1363 | L<Announced on 2002-07-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63720.html> |
| 1364 | |
| 1365 | There was the faint sound of footsteps. |
| 1366 | "Chap with a whip got as far as the big sharp spikes last week," |
| 1367 | said the low priest. |
| 1368 | There was a sound like the flushing of a very old dry lavatory. |
| 1369 | The footsteps stopped. The High Priest smiled to himself. |
| 1370 | "Right," he said. "See your two pebbles and raise you two pebbles." |
| 1371 | The low priest threw down his cards. "Double Onion," he said. |
| 1372 | The High Priest looked down suspiciously. |
| 1373 | The low priest consulted a scrap of paper. "That's three hundred |
| 1374 | thousand, nine hundred and sixty-four pebbles you owe me," he said. |
| 1375 | There was the sound of footsteps. The priests exchanged glances. |
| 1376 | "Haven't had one for poisoned-dart alley for quite some time," |
| 1377 | said the High Priest. |
| 1378 | "Five says he makes it", said the low priest. "You're on." |
| 1379 | There was a faint clatter of metal points on stone. |
| 1380 | "It's a shame to take your pebbles." |
| 1381 | There were footsteps again. |
| 1382 | |
| 1383 | =head2 v5.8.0-RC3 - no epigraph |
| 1384 | |
| 1385 | L<Announced on 2002-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63234.html> |
| 1386 | |
| 1387 | =head2 v5.8.0-RC2 - no epigraph |
| 1388 | |
| 1389 | L<Announced on 2002-06-21 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg62013.html> |
| 1390 | |
| 1391 | =head2 v5.8.0-RC1 - no epigraph |
| 1392 | |
| 1393 | L<Announced on 2002-06-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg60317.html> |
| 1394 | |
| 1395 | =head2 v5.7.3 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man" |
| 1396 | |
| 1397 | L<Announced on 2002-03-04 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/03/msg53652.html> |
| 1398 | |
| 1399 | Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. |
| 1400 | No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always |
| 1401 | got there first, and is waiting for it. |
| 1402 | |
| 1403 | =head2 v5.7.2 - Terry Pratchett, "Small Gods" |
| 1404 | |
| 1405 | L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/07/msg40370.html> |
| 1406 | |
| 1407 | His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools -- |
| 1408 | the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans -- and summed up |
| 1409 | all three of them in his famous phrase, "You can't trust any |
| 1410 | bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing |
| 1411 | you can do about it, so let's have a drink." |
| 1412 | |
| 1413 | =head2 v5.7.1 - Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic" |
| 1414 | |
| 1415 | L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33851.html> |
| 1416 | |
| 1417 | "What happens next?" asked Twoflower. |
| 1418 | |
| 1419 | Hrun screwed a finger in his ear and inspected it absently. |
| 1420 | |
| 1421 | "Oh,", he said, "I expect in a minute the door will be |
| 1422 | flung back and I'll be dragged off to some sort of temple |
| 1423 | arena where I'll fight maybe a couple of giant spiders |
| 1424 | and an eight-foot slave from the jungles of Klatch and then |
| 1425 | I'll rescue some kind of a princess from the altar and then |
| 1426 | I'll kill off a few guards or whatever and then this girl |
| 1427 | will show me the secret passage out of the place and we'll |
| 1428 | liberate a couple of horses and escape with the treasure." |
| 1429 | Hrun leaned his head back on his hands and looked at the |
| 1430 | ceiling, whistling tunelessly. |
| 1431 | |
| 1432 | "All that?" said Twoflower. |
| 1433 | |
| 1434 | "Usually." |
| 1435 | |
| 1436 | =head2 v5.7.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Moving Pictures" |
| 1437 | |
| 1438 | L<Announced on 2000-09-02 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/09/msg17730.html> |
| 1439 | |
| 1440 | The Librarian had seen many weird things in his time, |
| 1441 | but that had to be the 57th strangest. |
| 1442 | [footnote: he had a tidy mind] |
| 1443 | |
| 1444 | =head2 v5.6.2 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy" |
| 1445 | |
| 1446 | L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/deb8cb9ad918716f> |
| 1447 | |
| 1448 | When great or unexpected events fall out upon the stage of this |
| 1449 | sublunary word--the mind of man, which is an inquisitive kind of |
| 1450 | a substance, naturally takes a flight, behind the scenes, to see |
| 1451 | what is the cause and first spring of them--The search was not |
| 1452 | long in this instance. |
| 1453 | |
| 1454 | =head2 v5.6.2-RC1 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy" |
| 1455 | |
| 1456 | L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e3d4acc7a8dd3ce5> |
| 1457 | |
| 1458 | "Pray, my dear", quoth my mother, "have you not forgot to wind up the clock?" |
| 1459 | |
| 1460 | =head2 v5.6.1 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", Riddles in the Dark |
| 1461 | |
| 1462 | L<Announced on 2001-04-08 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33823.html> |
| 1463 | |
| 1464 | `What have I got in my pocket?' he said aloud. He was talking to |
| 1465 | himself, but Gollum thought it was a riddle, and he was frightfully |
| 1466 | upset. |
| 1467 | |
| 1468 | `Not fair! not fair!' he hissed. `It isn't fair, my precious, is it, |
| 1469 | to ask us what it's got in its nassty little pocketses?' |
| 1470 | |
| 1471 | Bilbo seeing what had happened and having nothing better to ask |
| 1472 | stuck to his question, `What have I got in my pocket?' he said |
| 1473 | louder. |
| 1474 | |
| 1475 | `S-s-s-s-s,' hissed Gollum. `It must give us three guesseses, |
| 1476 | my precious, three guesseses.' |
| 1477 | |
| 1478 | =head2 v5.6.1-foolish - no epigraph |
| 1479 | |
| 1480 | L<Announced on 2001-08-04 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33421.html> |
| 1481 | |
| 1482 | =head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL3 - I can't find the announcement |
| 1483 | |
| 1484 | No announcement available. |
| 1485 | |
| 1486 | =head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL2 - no epigraph |
| 1487 | |
| 1488 | L<Announced on 2001-01-31 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/01/msg29934.html> |
| 1489 | |
| 1490 | =head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL1 - no epigraph |
| 1491 | |
| 1492 | L<Announced on 2000-12-18 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/12/msg27738.html> |
| 1493 | |
| 1494 | =head2 v5.6.0 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", The Last Stage |
| 1495 | |
| 1496 | L<Announced on 2000-03-23 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10341.html> |
| 1497 | |
| 1498 | The dragon is withered, |
| 1499 | His bones are now crumbled; |
| 1500 | His armour is shivered, |
| 1501 | His splendour is humbled! |
| 1502 | Though sword shall be rusted, |
| 1503 | And throne and crown perish |
| 1504 | With strength that men trusted |
| 1505 | And wealth that they cherish, |
| 1506 | Here grass is still growing, |
| 1507 | And leaves are a yet swinging, |
| 1508 | The white water flowing, |
| 1509 | And elves are yet singing |
| 1510 | Come! Tra-la-la-lally! |
| 1511 | Come back to the valley. |
| 1512 | |
| 1513 | =head2 v5.6.0-RC3 - no epigraph |
| 1514 | |
| 1515 | L<Announced on 2000-03-22 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10140.html> |
| 1516 | |
| 1517 | =head2 v5.005_05-RC1 - no epigraph |
| 1518 | |
| 1519 | L<Announced on 2009-02-16 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/02/msg144227.html> |
| 1520 | |
| 1521 | =head2 v5.005_04 - no epigraph |
| 1522 | |
| 1523 | L<Announced on 2004-03-01 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6c240ad0b189cb47> |
| 1524 | |
| 1525 | =head2 v5.005_04-RC2 - Rudyard Kipling, "The Jungle Book" |
| 1526 | |
| 1527 | L<Announced on 2004-02-19 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83e5421124a7b49d> |
| 1528 | |
| 1529 | The monkeys called the place their city, and pretended to despise |
| 1530 | the Jungle-People because they lived in the forest. And yet they |
| 1531 | never knew what the buildings were made for nor how to use |
| 1532 | them. They would sit in circles on the hall of the king's council |
| 1533 | chamber, and scratch for fleas and pretend to be men; or they would |
| 1534 | run in and out of the roofless houses and collect pieces of plaster |
| 1535 | and old bricks in a corner, and forget where they had hidden them, |
| 1536 | and fight and cry in scuffling crowds, and then break off to play up |
| 1537 | and down the terraces of the king's garden, where they would shake |
| 1538 | the rose trees and the oranges in sport to see the fruit and flowers |
| 1539 | fall. |
| 1540 | |
| 1541 | =head2 v5.005_04-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
| 1542 | |
| 1543 | L<Announced on 2004-02-05 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6aaeb6ec699bd116> |
| 1544 | |
| 1545 | Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had |
| 1546 | plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to wonder what was |
| 1547 | going to happen next. First, she tried to look down and make out what |
| 1548 | she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything; then she looked |
| 1549 | at the sides of the well, and noticed that they were filled with |
| 1550 | cupboards and book-shelves; here and there she saw maps and pictures |
| 1551 | hung upon pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves as she |
| 1552 | passed; it was labelled 'ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great |
| 1553 | disappointment it was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear |
| 1554 | of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as |
| 1555 | she fell past it. |
| 1556 | |
| 1557 | =head2 v1.0_16 - Johan Vromans, extemporarily |
| 1558 | |
| 1559 | L<Announced on 2003-12-18 by Richard Clamp|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9281dc6194d15940> |
| 1560 | |
| 1561 | =head1 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS |
| 1562 | |
| 1563 | This document was originally compiled based on a list of epigraphs |
| 1564 | on L<Perl Monks|http://perlmonks.org> titled |
| 1565 | L<Recent Perl Release Announcement|http://perlmonks.org/?node_id=372406> |
| 1566 | by ysth. |
| 1567 | |
| 1568 | =cut |
| 1569 | |
| 1570 | # vim:tw=72: |