3 perlepigraphs - list of Perl release epigraphs
7 Many Perl release announcements included an I<epigraph>, a short excerpt
8 from a literary or other creative work, chosen by the pumpking or release
9 manager. This file assembles the known list of epigraph for posterity,
10 and also links to the release announcements in mailing list archives.
12 I<Note>: these have also been referred to as <epigrams>, but the
13 definition of I<epigraph> is closer to the way they have been used.
14 Consult your favorite dictionary for details.
18 =head2 v5.13.8 - Roger Williams, L<"The Fifth Gift"|http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/8/19/21304/8493>
20 L<Announced on 2010-12-19 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/12/msg167271.html>
22 The aliens called the box a "matter generator," but we'd be more inclined
23 to call it a matter duplicator. By connecting switches and potentiometers
24 between the copper posts it was possible to make the box mark off two
25 cubic rectangular areas of volume. Make a certain contact, and these
26 areas would be isolated within perfectly reflective fields. They could
27 be expanded or contracted by altering resistances between other posts.
28 As I worked out the user interface I built a little control panel for
29 the device. It was actually a clever way for the aliens to do things;
30 instead of trying to build controls we could use, they built us an
31 interface we could attach to controls that made sense to us. It could
34 Once you had made the contact that established the shielded volumes,
35 if you made another certain contact the contents of the first volume
36 were copied to the second. The machine copied metal, plastic, steel,
37 and diamond with equal ease. Copies of copies of copies of copies were
38 indistinguishable from the originals at any magnification, even using
39 techniques like X-ray crystallography.
41 =head2 v5.13.7 - Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski, 'The Matrix'
43 L<Announced on 2010-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/11/msg166162.html>
45 [Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one]
49 [Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
51 Trinity: What did you just say?
52 Neo: Nothing. Just had a little deja vu.
53 Trinity: What did you see?
54 Cypher: What happened?
55 Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just like it.
56 Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat?
57 Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure.
58 Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
60 Trinity: A deja vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when they change something.
62 =head2 v5.13.6 - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore"
64 L<Announced on 2010-10-20 by Tatsuhiko Miyagawa|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/10/msg165183.html>
66 The boy called Crow softly rests a hand on my shoulder, and with that
69 "From now on -- no matter what -- you've got to be the world's toughest
70 fifteen-year-old. That's the only way you're going to survive. And in order
71 to do that, you've got to figure out what it means to be tough. You following
74 I keep my eyes closed and don't reply. I just want to sink off into sleep
75 like this, his hand on my shoulder. I hear the faint flutter of wings.
77 "You're going to be the world's toughest fifteen-year-old," Crow whispers
78 as I try to fall asleep. Like he was carving the words in a deep blue tattoo
81 (Translated from Japanese by Philip Gabriel)
83 =head2 v5.13.5 - Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, "The Room in the Dragon Volant"
85 L<Announced on 2010-09-19 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg164238.html>
87 Candle in hand I stepped in. I do not know whether the quality of
88 air, long undisturbed, is peculiar; to me it has always seemed so, and
89 the damp smell of the old masonry hung in this atmosphere. My candle
90 faintly lighted the bare stone wall that enclosed the stair, the foot
91 of which I could not see. Down I went, and a few turns brought me to
92 the stone floor. Here was another door, of the simple, old, oak kind,
93 deep sunk in the thickness of the wall. The large end of the key
94 fitted this. The lock was stiff; I set the candle down upon the
95 stair, and applied both hands; it turned with difficulty, and as it
96 revolved, uttered a shriek that alarmed me for my secret.
98 For some minutes I did not move. In a little time, however, I took
99 courage, and opened the door. The night-air floating in puffed out
100 the candle. There was a thicket of holly and underwood, as dense as a
101 jungle, close about the door. I should have been in pitch-darkness,
102 were it not that through the topmost leaves there twinkled, here and
103 there, a glimmer of moonshine.
105 Softly, lest any one should have opened his window at the sound of the
106 rusty bolt, I struggled through this till I gained a view of the open
107 grounds. Here I found that the brushwood spread a good way up the
108 park, uniting with the wood that approached the little temple I have
111 =head2 v5.12.3 - Howard W. Campbell, Jr., "Reflections on Not Participating in Current Events"
113 L<Announced on 2011-01-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168368.html>
115 I saw a huge steam roller,
116 It blotted out the sun.
117 The people all lay down, lay down;
118 They did not try to run.
119 My love and I, we looked amazed
120 Upon the gory mystery.
121 'Lie down, lie down!' the people cried.
122 'The great machine is history!'
123 My love and I, we ran away,
124 The engine did not find us.
125 We ran up to a mountain top,
126 Left history far behind us.
127 Perhaps we should have stayed and died,
128 But somehow we don't think so.
129 We went to see where history'd been,
130 And my, the dead did stink so.
132 =head2 v5.12.2 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
134 L<Announced on 2919-09-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg163852.html>
136 CPUs. Cayce Pollard Units. That's what Damien calls the clothing
137 she wears. CPUs are either black, white, or gray, and ideally
138 seem to have come into this world without human intervention.
140 What people take for relentless minimalism is a side effect
141 of too much exposure to the reactor-cores of fashion. This
142 has resulted in a remorseless paring-down of what she can and
143 will wear. She is, literally, allergic to fashion. She can
144 only tolerate things that could have been worn, to a general
145 lack of comment, during any year between 1945 and 2000. She's a
146 design-free zone, a one-woman school of and whose very austerity
147 periodically threatens to spawn its own cult.
149 =head2 v5.12.2-RC1 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
151 L<Announced on 2010-08-31 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163670.html>
153 The front page opens, familiar as a friend's living room. A frame-grab
154 from #48 serves as backdrop, dim and almost monochrome, no characters in
155 view. This is one of the sequences that generate comparisons with
156 Tarkovsky. She only knows Tarkovsky from stills, really, though she did
157 once fall asleep during a screening of The Stalker, going under on an
158 endless pan, the camera aimed straight down, in close-up, at a puddle on
159 a ruined mosaic floor. But she is not one of those who think that much
160 will be gained by analysis of the maker's imagined influences. The cult
161 of the footage is rife with subcults, claiming every possible influence.
162 Truffaut, Peckinpah -- The Peckinpah people, among the least likely, are
163 still waiting for the guns to be drawn.
165 =head2 v5.13.4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
167 L<Announced on 2010-08-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163150.html>
169 `How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought Alice;
170 `I might as well be at school at once.' However, she got up, and began to repeat
171 it, but her head was so full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what
172 she was saying, and the words came very queer indeed:--
174 "'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare,
175 "You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair."
176 As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose
177 Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.'
180 `That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' said the Gryphon.
182 `Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it sounds uncommon
185 Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if
186 anything would ever happen in a natural way again.
188 `I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle.
190 `She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with the next verse.'
192 `But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How could he turn them out
193 with his nose, you know?'
195 `It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was dreadfully puzzled by
196 the whole thing, and longed to change the subject.
198 =head2 v5.13.3 - Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, "Good Omens"
200 L<Announced on 2010-07-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/07/msg162230.html>
202 Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading towards
203 Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would
204 notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth,
205 for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his
206 sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint.
208 Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was
209 dammned if he wasn't going to finish it in the Bentley as well.
210 Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of
211 motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage
212 Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn't have been able to tell
213 that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it
214 had ever even been a car.
216 There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have
217 been black, where it wasn't a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but
218 this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of
219 flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult
222 There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the
223 metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still
224 somhow riding an inch above the road surface this didn't seem to
225 make an awful lot of difference to the suspension.
227 It should have fallen apart miles back.
229 =head2 v5.13.2 - Iain M Banks, "Use of Weapons"
231 L<Announced on 2010-06-22 by Matt S Trout|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/06/msg161112.html>
233 We deal in the moral equivalent of black holes, where the normal laws -
234 the rules of right and wrong that people imagine apply everywhere else
235 in the universe - break down; beyond those metaphysical event-horizons,
236 there exist ... special circumstances.
238 =head2 v5.13.1 - Miguel de Unamuno, "The Sepulchre of Don Quixote"
240 L<Announced on 2010-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160275.html>
242 And if anyone shall come to you and say that he knows how to construct
243 bridges and that perhaps a time will come when you will wish to avail
244 yourself of his science in order to cross over a river, out with him! Out
245 with the engineer! Rivers will be crossed by wading or swimming them, even
246 if half the crusaders drown themselves. Let the engineer go off and build
247 bridges somewhere else, where they are badly wanted. For those who go in
248 quest of the sepulchre, faith is bridge enough.
250 =head2 v5.12.1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
252 L<Announced on 2010-05-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160109.html>
254 "Now suppose," chortled Dr. Breed, enjoying himself, "that there were
255 many possible ways in which water could crystallize, could freeze.
256 Suppose that the sort of ice we skate upon and put into highballs --
257 what we might call ice-one -- is only one of several types of ice.
258 Suppose water always froze as ice-one on Earth because it had never
259 had a seed to teach it how to form ice-two, ice-three, ice-four
260 ...? And suppose," he rapped on his desk with his old hand again,
261 "that there were one form, which we will call ice-nine -- a crystal as
262 hard as this desk -- with a melting point of, let us say, one-hundred
263 degrees Fahrenheit, or, better still, a melting point of one-hundred-
266 =head2 v5.12.1-RC2 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
268 L<Announced on 2010-05-13 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160066.html>
270 San Lorenzo was fifty miles long and twenty miles wide, I learned from
271 the supplement to the New York Sunday Times. Its population was four
272 hundred, fifty thousand souls, "...all fiercely dedicated to the ideals
275 Its highest point, Mount McCabe, was eleven thousand feet above sea
276 level. Its capital was Bolivar, "...a strikingly modern city built on a
277 harbor capable of sheltering the entire United States Navy." The principal
278 exports were sugar, coffee, bananas, indigo, and handcrafted novelties.
280 =head2 v5.12.1-RC1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
282 L<Announced on 2010-05-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg159971.html>
284 Which brings me to the Bokononist concept of a wampeter. A wampeter is
285 the pivot of a karass. No karass is without a wampeter, Bokonon tells us,
286 just as no wheel is without a hub. Anything can be a wampeter: a tree,
287 a rock, an animal, an idea, a book, a melody, the Holy Grail. Whatever
288 it is, the members of its karass revolve about it in the majestic chaos
289 of a spiral nebula. The orbits of the members of a karass about their
290 common wampeter are spiritual orbits, naturally. It is souls and not
291 bodies that revolve. As Bokonon invites us to sing:
293 Around and around and around we spin,
294 With feet of lead and wings of tin . . .
296 =head2 v5.13.0 - Jules Verne, "A Journey to the Centre of the Earth"
298 L<Announced on 2010-04-20 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg159275.html>
300 The heat still remained at quite a supportable degree. With an
301 involuntary shudder, I reflected on what the heat must have been
302 when the volcano of Sneffels was pouring its smoke, flames, and
303 streams of boiling lava -- all of which must have come up by the
304 road we were now following. I could imagine the torrents of hot
305 seething stone darting on, bubbling up with accompaniments of
306 smoke, steam, and sulphurous stench!
308 "Only to think of the consequences," I mused, "if the old
309 volcano were once more to set to work."
311 =head2 v5.12.0 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
313 L<Announced on 2010-04-12 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158820.html>
315 'Please would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, for she was
316 not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, 'why
317 your cat grins like that?'
319 'It's a Cheshire cat,' said the Duchess, 'and that's why. Pig!'
321 She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite
322 jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby,
323 and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:--
325 'I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know
326 that cats COULD grin.'
328 'They all can,' said the Duchess; 'and most of 'em do.'
330 =head2 v5.12.0-RC5 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
332 L<Announced on 2010-04-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158720.html>
334 'Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly; 'some of the words
337 'It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar decidedly, and
338 there was silence for some minutes.
340 =head2 v5.12.0-RC4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
342 L<Announced on 2010-04-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158567.html>
344 'It was much pleasanter at home,' thought poor Alice, 'when one wasn't
345 always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and
346 rabbits. I almost wish I hadn't gone down that rabbit-hole--and yet--and
347 yet--it's rather curious, you know, this sort of life! I do wonder what
348 can have happened to me! When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that
349 kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one!
351 =head2 v5.12.0-RC3 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
353 L<Announced on 2010-04-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158346.html>
355 At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them,
356 called out, 'Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL soon make you
357 dry enough!' They all sat down at once, in a large ring, with the Mouse
358 in the middle. Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt
359 sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon.
361 'Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, 'are you all ready? This
362 is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! "William
363 the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was soon submitted
364 to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of late much
365 accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of
366 Mercia and Northumbria --"'
368 =head2 v5.12.0-RC2 - no announcement
370 Available on CPAN since 2010-04-01.
372 =head2 v5.12.0-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
374 L<Announced on 2010-03-29 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg158060.html>
376 So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the
377 hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of
378 making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and
379 picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran
382 There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice think it so
383 VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, 'Oh dear! Oh
384 dear! I shall be late!' (when she thought it over afterwards, it
385 occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this, but at the time
386 it all seemed quite natural); but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH
387 OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on,
388 Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had
389 never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to
390 take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the field
391 after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large
392 rabbit-hole under the hedge.
394 In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how
395 in the world she was to get out again.
397 =head2 v5.12.0-RC0 - no epigraph
399 L<Announced on 2020-03-21 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg157761.html>
401 =head2 v5.11.5 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "Christabel"
403 L<Announced on 2010-02-21 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/02/msg156957.html>
405 A little child, a limber elf,
406 Singing, dancing to itself,
407 A fairy thing with red round cheeks,
408 That always finds, and never seeks,
409 Makes such a vision to the sight
410 As fills a father's eyes with light;
411 And pleasures flow in so thick and fast
412 Upon his heart, that he at last
413 Must needs express his love's excess
414 With words of unmeant bitterness.
415 Perhaps 'tis pretty to force together
416 Thoughts so all unlike each other;
417 To mutter and mock a broken charm,
418 To dally with wrong that does no harm.
419 Perhaps 'tis tender too and pretty
420 At each wild word to feel within
421 A sweet recoil of love and pity.
422 And what, if in a world of sin
423 (O sorrow and shame should this be true!)
424 Such giddiness of heart and brain
425 Comes seldom save from rage and pain,
426 So talks as it's most used to do.
428 =head2 v5.11.4 - Fyodor Dostoevsky, "Crime and Punishment"
430 L<Announced on 2010-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/01/msg155848.html>
432 And you don't suppose that I went into it headlong like a fool? I went
433 into it like a wise man, and that was just my destruction. And you
434 mustn't suppose that I didn't know, for instance, that if I began to
435 question myself whether I had the right to gain power -- I certainly
436 hadn't the right -- or that if I asked myself whether a human being is a
437 louse it proved that it wasn't so for me, though it might be for a man
438 who would go straight to his goal without asking questions.... If I
439 worried myself all those days, wondering whether Napoleon would have
440 done it or not, I felt clearly of course that I wasn't Napoleon.
442 =head2 v5.11.3 - Mark Twain, "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer"
444 L<Announced on 2009-12-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/12/msg154838.html>
446 "Say -- I'm going in a swimming, I am. Don't you wish you could? But of
447 course you'd druther work -- wouldn't you? Course you would!"
449 Tom contemplated the boy a bit, and said: "What do you call work?"
451 "Why ain't that work?"
453 Tom resumed his whitewashing, and answered carelessly: "Well, maybe it
454 is, and maybe it aint. All I know, is, it suits Tom Sawyer."
456 "Oh come, now, you don't mean to let on that you like it?"
458 The brush continued to move. "Like it? Well I don't see why I oughtn't
459 to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?"
461 That put the thing in a new light. Ben stopped nibbling his apple. Tom
462 swept his brush daintily back and forth -- stepped back to note the effect
463 -- added a touch here and there-criticised the effect again -- Ben
464 watching every move and getting more and more interested, more and more
465 absorbed. Presently he said: "Say, Tom, let me whitewash a little."
467 =head2 v5.11.2 - Michael Marshall Smith, "Only Forward"
469 L<Announced on 2009-11-20 by |http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/11/msg153646.html>
471 The streets were pretty quiet, which was nice. They're always quiet here
472 at that time: you have to be wearing a black jacket to be out on the
473 streets between seven and nine in the evening, and not many people in
474 the area have black jackets. It's just one of those things. I currently
475 live in Colour Neighbourhood, which is for people who are heavily into
476 colour. All the streets and buildings are set for instant colourmatch:
477 as you walk down the road they change hue to offset whatever you're
478 wearing. When the streets are busy it's kind of intense, and anyone
479 prone to epileptic seizures isn't allowed to live in the Neighbourhood,
480 however much they're into colour.
482 =head2 v5.11.1 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
484 L<Announced on 2009-10-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg152360.html>
486 Milo had been caught red-handed in the act of plundering his countrymen,
487 and, as a result, his stock had never been higher. He proved good as his
488 word when a rawboned major from Minnesota curled his lip in rebellious
489 disavowal and demanded his share of the syndicate Milo kept saying
490 everybody owned. Milo met the challenge by writing the words "A Share"
491 on the nearest scrap of paper and handing it away with a virtuous disdain
492 that won the envy and admiration of almost everyone who knew him. His
493 glory was at a peak, and Colonel Cathcart, who knew and admired his
494 war record, was astonished by the deferential humility with which Mil
495 presented himself at Group Headquarters and made his fantastic appeal
496 for more hazardous assignment.
498 =head2 v5.11.0 - Mikhail Bulgakov, "The Master and Margarita"
500 L<Announced on 2009-10-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg151376.html>
502 Whispers of an "evil power" were heard in lines at dairy shops, in
503 streetcars, stores, arguments, kitchens, suburban and long-distance
504 trains, at stations large and small, in dachas and on beaches. Needless
505 to say, truly mature and cultured people did not tell these stories
506 about an evil power's visit to the capital. In fact, they even made fun
507 of them and tried to talk sense into those who told them. Nevertheless,
508 facts are facts, as they say, and cannot simply be dismissed without
509 explanation: somebody had visited the capital. The charred cinders of
510 Griboyedov alone, and many other things besides, confirmed it. Cultured
511 people shared the point of view of the investigating team: it was the
512 work of a gang of hypnotists and ventriloquists magnificently skilled in
515 =head2 v5.10.1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
517 L<Announced on 2009-09-23 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150172.html>
519 'Briefly, sir, I am the Permanent Under-Secretary of State, known as
520 the Permanent Secretary. Woolley here is your Principal Private
521 Secretary. I, too, have a Principal Private Secretary, and he is the
522 Principal Private Secretary to the Permanent Secretary. Directly
523 responsible to me are ten Deputy Secretaries, eighty-seven Under
524 Secretaries and two hundred and nineteen Assistant Secretaries.
525 Directly responsible to the Principal Private Secretaries are plain
526 Private Secretaries. The Prime Minister will be appointing two
527 Parliamentary Under-Secretaries and you will be appointing your own
528 Parliamentary Private Secretary.'
530 'Can they all type?' I joked.
532 'None of us can type, Minister,' replied Sir Humphrey smoothly. 'Mrs
533 McKay types - she is your Secretary.'
535 I couldn't tell whether or not he was joking. 'What a pity,' I said.
536 'We could have opened an agency.'
538 Sir Humphrey and Bernard laughed. 'Very droll, sir,' said Sir
539 Humphrey. 'Most amusing, sir,' said Bernard. Were they genuinely
540 amused at my wit, or just being rather patronising? 'I suppose they
541 all say that, do they?' I ventured.
543 Sir Humphrey reassured me on that. 'Certainly not, Minister,' he
544 replied. 'Not quite all.'
546 =head2 v5.10.1-RC2 - no epigraph
548 L<Announced on 2009-08-18 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150015.html>
550 =head2 v5.10.1-RC1 - no epigraph
552 L<Announced on 2009-08-06 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg149498.html>
554 =head2 5.005_05-RC1 - no epigraph
556 L<Announced on 2009-02-16 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/02/msg144227.html>
558 =head2 v5.8.9 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
560 L<Announced on 2008-12-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/12/msg142571.html>
562 Frank and I, unlike the civil servants, were still puzzled that such a
563 proposal as the Europass could even be seriously under consideration by
564 the FCO. We can both see clearly that it is wonderful ammunition for the
565 anti-Europeans. I asked Humphrey if the Foreign Office doesn't realise
566 how damaging this would be to the European ideal?
568 'I'm sure they do, Minister, he said. That's why they support it.'
570 This was even more puzzling, since I'd always been under the impression
571 that the FO is pro-Europe. 'Is it or isn't it?' I asked Humphrey.
573 'Yes and no,' he replied of course, 'if you'll pardon the
574 expression. The Foreign Office is pro-Europe because it is really
575 anti-Europe. In fact the Civil Service was united in its desire to make
576 sure the Common Market didn't work. That's why we went into it.'
578 This sounded like a riddle to me. I asked him to explain further. And
579 basically his argument was as follows: Britain has had the same foreign
580 policy objective for at least the last five hundred years - to create a
581 disunited Europe. In that cause we have fought with the Dutch against
582 the Spanish, with the Germans against the French, with the French and
583 Italians against the Germans, and with the French against the Italians
584 and Germans. [The Dutch rebellion against Phillip II of Spain, the
585 Napoleonic Wars, the First World War, and the Second World War - Ed.]
587 In other words, divide and rule. And the Foreign Office can see no
588 reason to change when it has worked so well until now.
590 I was aware of this, naturally, but I regarded it as ancient history.
591 Humphrey thinks that it is, in fact, current policy. It was necessary
592 for us to break up the EEC, he explained, so we had to get inside. We
593 had previously tried to break it up from the outside, but that didn't
594 work. [A reference to our futile and short-lived involvement in EFTA,
595 the European Free Trade Association, founded in 1960 and which the UK
596 left in 1972 - Ed.] Now that we're in, we are able to make a complete
597 pig's breakfast out of it. We've now set the Germans against the French,
598 the French against the Italians, the Italians against the Dutch... and
599 the Foreign office is terribly happy. It's just like old time.
601 I was staggered by all of this. I thought that the all of us who are
602 publicly pro-European believed in the European ideal. I said this to Sir
603 Humphrey, and he simply chuckled.
605 So I asked him: if we don't believe in the European Ideal, why are we
606 pushing to increase the membership?
608 'Same reason,' came the reply. 'It's just like the United Nations. The
609 more members it has, the more arguments you can stir up, and the more
610 futile and impotent it becomes.'
612 This all strikes me as the most appalling cynicism, and I said so.
614 Sir Humphrey agreed completely. 'Yes Minister. We call it
615 diplomacy. It's what made Britain great, you know.'
617 =head2 v5.8.9-RC2 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
619 L<Announced on 2008-12-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg142422.html>
621 There was silence in the office. I didn't know what we were going to do
622 about the four hundred new people supervising our economy drive or the
623 four hundred new people for the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office, or
624 anything! I simply sat and waited and hoped that my head would stop
625 thumping and that some idea would be suggested by someone sometime soon.
627 Sir Humphrey obliged. 'Minister... if we were to end the economy drive
628 and close the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office we could issue an immediate
629 press announcement that you had axed eight hundred jobs.' He had
630 obviously thought this out carefully in advance, for at this moment he
631 produced a slim folder from under his arm. 'If you'd like to approve
634 I couldn't believe the impertinence of the suggestion. Axed eight
635 hundred jobs? 'But no one was ever doing these jobs,' I pointed out
636 incredulously. 'No one's been appointed yet.'
638 'Even greater economy,' he replied instantly. 'We've saved eight hundred
639 redundancy payments as well.'
641 'But...' I attempted to explain '... that's just phony. It's dishonest,
642 it's juggling with figures, it's pulling the wool over people's eyes.'
644 'A government press release, in fact.' said Humphrey.
646 =head2 v5.8.9-RC1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
648 L<Announced on 2008-11-10 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg141515.html>
650 A jumbo jet touched down, with BURANDAN AIRWAYS written on the side. I
651 was hugely impressed. British Airways are having to pawn their Concordes,
652 and here is this little tiny African state with its own airline, jumbo
655 I asked Bernard how many planes Burandan Airways had. 'None,' he said.
657 I told him not to be silly and use his eyes. 'No Minister, it belongs to
658 Freddie Laker,' he said. 'They chartered it last week and repainted it
659 specially.' Apparently most of the Have-Nots (I mean, LDCs) do this - at
660 the opening of the UN General Assembly the runways of Kennedy Airport are
661 jam-packed with phoney flag-carriers. 'In fact,' said Bernard with a sly
662 grin, 'there was one 747 that belonged to nine different African airlines
663 in a month. They called it the mumbo-jumbo.'
665 While we watched nothing much happening on the TV except the mumbo-jumbo
666 taxiing around Prestwick and the Queen looking a bit chilly, Bernard gave
667 me the next day's schedule and explained that I was booked on the night
668 sleeper from King's Cross to Edinburgh because I had to vote in a
669 three-line whip at the House tonight and would have to miss the last
670 plane. Then the commentator, in that special hushed BBC voice used for any
671 occasion with which Royalty is connected, announced reverentially that we
672 were about to catch our first glimpse of President Selim.
674 And out of the plane stepped Charlie. My old friend Charlie Umtali. We
675 were at LSE together. Not Selim Mohammed at all, but Charlie.
677 Bernard asked me if I were sure. Silly question. How could you forget a
678 name like Charlie Umtali?
680 I sent Bernard for Sir Humphrey, who was delighted to hear that we now
681 know something about our official visitor.
683 Bernard's official brief said nothing. Amazing! Amazing how little the FCO
684 has been able to find out. Perhaps they were hoping it would all be on the
685 car radio. All the brief says is that Colonel Selim Mohammed had converted
686 to Islam some years ago, they didn't know his original name, and therefore
687 knew little of his background.
689 I was able to tell Humphrey and Bernard /all/ about his background.
690 Charlie was a red-hot political economist, I informed them. Got the top
691 first. Wiped the floor with everyone.
693 Bernard seemed relieved. 'Well that's all right then.'
697 'I think Bernard means,' said Sir Humphrey helpfully, 'that he'll know how
698 to behave if he was at an English University. Even if it was the LSE.' I
699 never know whether or not Humphrey is insulting me intentionally.
701 Humphrey was concerned about Charlie's political colour. 'When you said
702 that he was red-hot, were you speaking politically?'
704 In a way I was. 'The thing about Charlie is that you never quite know
705 where you are with him. He's the sort of chap who follows you into a
706 revolving door and comes out in front.'
708 'No deeply held convictions?' asked Sir Humphrey.
710 'No. The only thing Charlie was committed too was Charlie.'
712 'Ah, I see. A politician, Minister.'
714 =head2 v5.10.0 - Laurence Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
716 L<Announced on 2007-12-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/12/msg131636.html>
718 He would often declare, in speaking his thoughts upon the subject, that
719 he did not conceive how the greatest family in England could stand it
720 out against an uninterrupted succession of six or seven short
721 noses.--And for the contrary reason, he would generally add, That it
722 must be one of the greatest problems in civil life, where the same
723 number of long and jolly noses, following one another in a direct line,
724 did not raise and hoist it up into the best vacancies in the kingdom.
726 =head2 v5.10.0-RC2 - no epigraph
728 L<Announced on 2007-11-25 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130978.html>
730 =head2 v5.10.0-RC1 - no epigraph
732 L<Announced on 2007-11-17 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130653.html>
734 =head2 v5.9.5 - no announcement
736 L<Pre-announced on 2007-07-07 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/07/msg126358.html>,
737 available on CPAN with same date, but never actually announced.
739 =head2 v5.9.4 - no epigraph
741 L<Announced on 2006-08-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/08/msg115782.html>
743 =head2 v5.8.8 - Joe Raposo, "Bein' Green"
745 L<Announced on 2006-02-01 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/28caf52e41ebe723>
747 It's not that easy bein' green
748 Having to spend each day the color of the leaves
749 When I think it could be nicer being red or yellow or gold
750 Or something much more colorful like that
752 It's not easy bein' green
753 It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things
754 And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're
755 Not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water
758 But green's the color of Spring
759 And green can be cool and friendly-like
760 And green can be big like an ocean
761 Or important like a mountain
764 When green is all there is to be
765 It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why?
766 Wonder I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful
767 And I think it's what I want to be
769 =head2 v5.9.3 - no epigraph
771 L<Announced on 2006-01-28 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg109086.html>
773 =head2 v5.8.8-RC1 - Cosgrove Hall Productions, "Dangermouse"
775 L<Announced on 2006-01-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/d231fc554af8cc51>
777 Greenback: And the world is mine, all mine. Muhahahahaha. See to it!
779 Stiletto: Si, Barone. Subito, Barone.
781 =head2 v5.8.7 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
783 L<Announced on 2005-05-31 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9a545704a0062f16>
785 And now, imagine the triumphant procession: Peter at the head; after him the
786 hunters leading the wolf; and winding up the procession, grandfather and the
789 Grandfather shook his head discontentedly: "Well, and if Peter hadn't caught
790 the wolf? What then?"
792 =head2 v5.8.7-RC1 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
794 L<Announced on 2005-05-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/05/msg100711.html>
796 And now this is how things stood: The cat was sitting on one branch. The
797 bird on another, not too close to the cat. And the wolf walked round and
798 round the tree, looking at them with greedy eyes.
800 In the meantime, Peter, without the slightest fear, stood behind the
801 gate, watching all that was going on. He ran home,got a strong rope and
802 climbed up the high stone wall.
804 One of the branches of the tree, around which the wolf was walking,
805 stretched out over the wall.
807 Grabbing hold of the branch, Peter lightly climbed over on to the tree.
808 Peter said to the bird: "Fly down and circle round the wolf's head, only
809 take care that he doesn't catch you!".
811 The bird almost touched the wolf's head with its wings, while the wolf
812 snapped angrily at him from this side and that.
814 How that bird teased the wolf, how that wolf wanted to catch him! But
815 the bird was clever and the wolf simply couldn't do anything about it.
817 =head2 v5.9.2 - Thomas Pynchon, "V"
819 L<Announced on 2005-04-01 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20050401150702.2b4a70d5@grubert.mandrakesoft.com>
821 This word flip was weird. Every recording date of McClintic's he'd
822 gotten into the habit of talking electricity with the audio men and
823 technicians of the studio. McClintic once couldn't have cared less
824 about electricity, but now it seemed if that was helping him reach a
825 bigger audience, some digging, some who would never dig, but all
826 paying and those royalties keeping the Triumph in gas and McClintic
827 in J. Press suits, then McClintic ought to be grateful to
828 electricity, ought maybe to learn a little more about it. So he'd
829 picked up some here and there, and one day last summer he got around
830 to talking stochastic music and digital computers with one
831 technician. Out of the conversation had come Set/Reset, which was
832 getting to be a signature for the group. He had found out from this
833 sound man about a two-triode circuit called a flip-flop, which when
834 it turned on could be one of two ways, depending on which tube was
835 conducting and which was cut off: set or reset, flip or flop.
837 "And that," the man said, "can be yes or no, or one or zero. And
838 that is what you might call one of the basic units, or specialized
839 `cells' in a big `electronic brain.' "
841 "Crazy," said McClintic, having lost him back there someplace. But
842 one thing that did occur to him was if a computer's brain could go
843 flip or flop, why so could a musician's. As long as you were flop,
844 everything was cool. But where did the trigger-pulse come from to
847 =head2 v5.8.6 - A. A. Milne, "The House at Pooh Corner"
849 L<Announced on 2004-11-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20041128000836.GA304@Bagpuss.unfortu.net>
851 "Hallo, Pooh," said Piglet, giving a jump of surprise. "I knew it was
854 "So did I,", said Pooh. "What are you doing?"
856 "I'm planting a haycorn, Pooh, so that it can grow up into an oak-tree,
857 and have lots of haycorns just outside the front door instead of having
858 to walk miles and miles, do you see, Pooh?"
860 "Supposing it doesn't?" said Pooh.
862 "It will, because Christopher Robin says it will, so that's why I'm
865 "Well," aid Pooh, "if I plant a honeycomb outside my house, then it will
866 grow up into a beehive."
868 Piglet wasn't quite sure about this.
870 "Or a /piece/ of a honeycomb," said Pooh, "so as not to waste too much.
871 Only then I might only get a piece of a beehive, and it might be the
872 wrong piece, where the bees were buzzing and not hunnying. Bother"
874 Piglet agreed that that would be rather bothering.
876 "Besides, Pooh, it's a very difficult thing, planting unless you know
877 how to do it," he said; and he put the acorn in the hole he had made,
878 and covered it up with earth, and jumped on it.
880 =head2 v5.8.6-RC1 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie the Pooh"
882 L<Announced on 2004-11-11 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/11/msg95786.html>
884 "Hallo!" said Piglet, "whare are /you/ doing?"
886 "Hunting," said Pooh.
890 "Tracking something," said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously.
892 "Tracking what?" said Piglet, coming closer.
894 "That's just what I ask myself, I ask myself, What?"
896 "What do you think you'll answer?"
898 "I shall have to wait until I catch up with it," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
899 "Now, look there." He pointed to the ground in front of him. "What do
902 "Track," said Piglet. "Paw-marks." He gave a little squeak of
903 excitement. "Oh, Pooh!" Do you think it's a--a--a Woozle?"
905 =head2 v5.8.5 - wikipedia, "Yew"
907 L<Announced on 2004-07-19 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/68340e2e4c39222c>
909 Yews are relatively slow growing trees, widely used in landscaping and
910 ornamental horticulture. They have flat, dark-green needles, reddish
911 bark, and bear seeds with red arils, which are eaten by thrushes,
912 waxwings and other birds, dispersing the hard seeds undamaged in their
913 droppings. Yew wood is reddish brown (with white sapwood), and very
914 hard. It was traditionally used to make bows, especially the English
917 In England, the Common Yew (Taxus baccata, also known as English Yew) is
918 often found in churchyards. It is sometimes suggested that these are
919 placed there as a symbol of long life or trees of death, and some are
920 likely to be over 3,000 years old. It is also suggested that yew trees
921 may have a pre-Christian association with old pagan holy sites, and the
922 Christian church found it expedient to use and take over existing sites.
923 Another explanation is that the poisonous berries and foliage discourage
924 farmers and drovers from letting their animals wander into the burial
925 grounds. The yew tree is a frequent symbol in the Christian poetry of
926 T.S. Eliot, especially his Four Quartets.
928 =head2 v5.8.5-RC2 - wikipedia, "Beech"
930 L<Announced on 2004-07-09 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/f92175725af7a5ad>
932 Beeches are trees of the Genus Fagus, family Fagaceae, including about
933 ten species in Europe, Asia, and North America. The leaves are entire or
934 sparsely toothed. The fruit is a small, sharply-angled nut, borne in
935 pairs in spiny husks. The beech most commonly grown as an ornamental or
936 shade tree is the European beech (Fagus sylvatica).
938 The southern beeches belong to a different but related genus,
939 Nothofagus. They are found in Australia, New Zealand, New Guinea, New
940 Caledonia and South America.
942 =head2 v5.8.5-RC1 - wikipedia, "Pedunculate Oak" (abridged)
944 L<Announced on 2004-07-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/ca6ce4a7ed9f219c?pli=1>
946 The Pedunculate Oak is called the Common Oak in Britain, and is also
947 often called the English Oak in other English speaking countries It is a
948 large deciduous tree to 25-35m tall (exceptionally to 40m), with lobed
949 and sessile (stalk-less) leaves. Flowering takes place in early to mid
950 spring, and their fruit, called "acorns", ripen by autumn of the same
951 year. The acorns are pedunculate (having a peduncle or acorn-stalk) and
952 may occur singly, or several acorns may occur on a stalk.
954 It forms a long-lived tree, with a large widespreading head of rugged
955 branches. While it may naturally live to an age of a few centuries, many
956 of the oldest trees are pollarded or coppiced, both pruning techniques
957 that extend the tree's potential lifespan, if not its health.
959 Within its native range it is valued for its importance to insects and
960 other wildlife. Numerous insects live on the leaves, buds, and in the
961 acorns. The acorns form a valuable food resource for several small
962 mammals and some birds, notably Jays Garrulus glandarius.
964 It is planted for forestry, and produces a long-lasting and durable
965 heartwood, much in demand for interior and furniture work.
967 =head2 v5.8.4 - T. S. Eliot, "The Old Gumbie Cat"
969 L<Announced on 2004-04-22 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/c7333acf03ef4015>
971 I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots;
972 The curtain-cord she likes to wind, and tie it into sailor-knots.
973 She sits upon the window-sill, or anything that's smooth and flat:
974 She sits and sits and sits and sits -- and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat!
976 But when the day's hustle and bustle is done,
977 Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun.
978 She thinks that the cockroaches just need employment
979 To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment.
980 So she's formed, from that a lot of disorderly louts,
981 A troop of well-disciplined helpful boy-scouts,
982 With a purpose in life and a good deed to do--
983 And she's even created a Beetles' Tattoo.
985 So for Old Gumbie Cats let us now give three cheers --
986 On whom well-ordered households depend, it appears.
989 =head2 v5.8.4-RC2 - T. S. Eliot, "Macavity: The Mystery Cat"
991 L<Announced on 2004-04-16 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/84f6fdd73cc56a1b>
993 Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw --
994 For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
995 He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
996 For when they reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
998 Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
999 He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
1000 His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
1001 And when you reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
1002 You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air --
1003 But I tell you once and once again, /Macavity's not there/!
1005 =head2 v5.8.4-RC1 - T. S. Eliot, "Skimbleshanks: The Railway Cat"
1007 L<Announced on 2004-04-05 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e500353440769ebf>
1009 There's a whisper down the line at 11.39
1010 When the Night Mail's ready to depart,
1011 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble has he gone to hunt the thimble?
1012 We must find him of the train can't start.'
1013 All the guards and all the porters and the stationmaster's daughters
1014 They are searching high and low,
1015 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble for unless he's very nimble
1016 Then the Night Mail just can't go'
1017 At 11.42 then the signal's overdue
1018 And the passengers are frantic to a man--
1019 Then Skimble will appear and he'll saunter to the rear:
1020 He's been busy in the luggage van!
1021 He gives one flash of his glass-green eyes
1022 And the the signal goes 'All Clear!'
1023 And we're off at last of the northern part
1024 Of the Northern Hemisphere!
1026 =head2 v5.9.1 - Tom Stoppard, "Arcadia"
1028 L<Announced on 2004-03-16 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/8587d77c565f2d43>
1030 Aren't you supposed to have a pony?
1032 =head2 5.005_04 - no epigraph
1034 L<Announced on 2004-03-01 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6c240ad0b189cb47>
1036 =head2 5.005_04-RC2 - Rudyard Kipling, "The Jungle Book"
1038 L<Announced on 2004-02-19 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83e5421124a7b49d>
1040 The monkeys called the place their city, and pretended to despise
1041 the Jungle-People because they lived in the forest. And yet they
1042 never knew what the buildings were made for nor how to use
1043 them. They would sit in circles on the hall of the king's council
1044 chamber, and scratch for fleas and pretend to be men; or they would
1045 run in and out of the roofless houses and collect pieces of plaster
1046 and old bricks in a corner, and forget where they had hidden them,
1047 and fight and cry in scuffling crowds, and then break off to play up
1048 and down the terraces of the king's garden, where they would shake
1049 the rose trees and the oranges in sport to see the fruit and flowers
1052 =head2 5.005_04-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1054 L<Announced on 2004-02-05 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6aaeb6ec699bd116>
1056 Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had
1057 plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to wonder what was
1058 going to happen next. First, she tried to look down and make out what
1059 she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything; then she looked
1060 at the sides of the well, and noticed that they were filled with
1061 cupboards and book-shelves; here and there she saw maps and pictures
1062 hung upon pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves as she
1063 passed; it was labelled 'ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great
1064 disappointment it was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear
1065 of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as
1068 =head2 v5.8.3 - Arthur William Edgar O'Shaugnessy, "Ode"
1070 L<Announced on 2004-01-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/968fb8d71e23af69>
1072 We are the music makers,
1073 And we are the dreamers of dreams,
1074 Wandering by lonely sea-breakers,
1075 And sitting by desolate streams; --
1076 World-losers and world-forsakers,
1077 On whom the pale moon gleams:
1078 Yet we are the movers and shakers
1079 Of the world for ever, it seems.
1081 =head2 v5.8.3-RC1 - Irving Berlin, "Let's Face the Music and Dance"
1083 L<Announced on 2004-01-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/5ced50bebcd11c96>
1085 There may be trouble ahead,
1086 But while there's music and moonlight,
1087 And love and romance,
1088 Let's face the music and dance.
1090 Before the fiddlers have fled,
1091 Before they ask us to pay the bill,
1092 And while we still have that chance,
1093 Let's face the music and dance.
1095 Soon, we'll be without the moon,
1096 Humming a different tune, and then,
1098 There may be teardrops to shed,
1099 So while there's music and moonlight,
1100 And love and romance,
1101 Let's face the music and dance.
1103 =head2 v1.0_16 - Johan Vromans, extemporarily
1105 L<Announced on 2003-12-18 by Richard Clamp|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9281dc6194d15940>
1107 =head2 v5.6.2 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
1109 L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/deb8cb9ad918716f>
1111 When great or unexpected events fall out upon the stage of this
1112 sublunary word--the mind of man, which is an inquisitive kind of
1113 a substance, naturally takes a flight, behind the scenes, to see
1114 what is the cause and first spring of them--The search was not
1115 long in this instance.
1117 =head2 v5.6.2-RC1 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
1119 L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e3d4acc7a8dd3ce5>
1121 "Pray, my dear", quoth my mother, "have you not forgot to wind up the clock?"
1123 =head2 v5.8.2 - Walt Whitman, "Passage to India"
1125 L<Announced on 2003-11-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/4714574f93967673>
1127 Passage, immediate passage! the blood burns in my veins!
1128 Away O soul! hoist instantly the anchor!
1129 Cut the hawsers - hall out - shake out every sail!
1130 Have we not stood here like trees in the ground long enough?
1131 Have we not grovel'd here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes?
1132 Have we not darken'd and dazed ourselves with books long enough?
1134 Sail forth - steer for the deep waters only,
1135 Reckless O soul, exploring, I with the and thou with me,
1136 For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go,
1137 And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all.
1140 O farther farther sail!
1141 O daring job, but safe! are they not all the seas of God?
1142 O farther, farther, farther sail!
1144 =head2 v5.8.2-RC2 - Eric Idle/John Du Prez, "Accountancy Shanty"
1146 L<Announced on 2003-11-03 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/7669de5804b792f6>
1148 It's fun to charter an accountant
1149 And sail the wide accountan-cy,
1150 To find, explore the funds offshore
1151 And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy.
1153 =head2 v5.8.2-RC1 - Edward Lear, "The Jumblies"
1155 L<Announced on 2003-10-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83680ef3bbf7378d>
1157 They went to sea in a Sieve, they did,
1158 In a Sieve they went to sea:
1159 In spite of all their friends could say,
1160 On a winter's morn, on a stormy day,
1161 In a Sieve they went to sea!
1162 And when the Sieve turned round and round,
1163 And everyone cried, "You'll all be drowned!"
1164 They cried aloud, "Our Sieve ain't big,
1165 But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig!
1166 In a Sieve we'll go to sea!"
1168 Far and few, far and few,
1169 Are the lands where the Jumblies live;
1170 Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
1171 And they went to sea in a Sieve.
1173 =head2 v5.9.0 - Doris Lessing, "Martha Quest"
1175 L<Announced on 2003-10-27 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/63a8c34385de82a1>
1177 What of October, that ambiguous month
1179 =head2 v5.8.1 - epigraph same as v5.7.1
1181 L<Announced on 2003-09-25 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82678.html>
1183 =head2 v5.8.1-RC5 - Terry Pratchett, "Lords and Ladies"
1185 L<Announced on 2003-09-22 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82476.html>
1187 No matter what she did with her hair it took about
1188 three minutes for it to tangle itself up again,
1189 like a garden hosepipe in a shed [Footnote: Which,
1190 no matter how carefully coiled, will always uncoil
1191 overnight and tie the lawnmower to the bicycles].
1193 =head2 v5.8.1-RC4 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1195 L<Announced on 2003-08-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/08/msg79184.html>
1197 Grand Viziers were /always/ scheming megalomaniacs.
1198 It was probably in the job description: "Are you a
1199 devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good,
1200 then you can be my most trusted minister."
1202 =head2 v5.8.1-RC3 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1204 L<Announced on 2003-07-30 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg79048.html>
1206 Lord Hong had a mind like a knife, although possibly
1207 a knife with a curved blade.
1209 =head2 v5.8.1-RC2 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1211 L<Announced on 2003-07-11 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78102.html>
1213 Many an ancient lord's last words had been, "You can't kill
1214 me because I've got magic aaargh."
1216 =head2 v5.8.1-RC1 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1218 L<Announced on 2003-07-10 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78009.html>
1220 Cohen was familiar with city gates. He'd broken down a number
1221 in his time, by battering ram, siege gun, and on one occasion
1224 But the gates of Hunghung were pretty damn good gates. They
1225 weren't like the gates of Ankh-Morpork, which were usually wide
1226 open to attract the spending customer and whose concession to
1227 defense was the sign "Thank You For Not Attacking Our City.
1228 Bonum Diem." These things were big and made of metal and there
1229 was a guardhouse and a squad of unhelpful men in black armor.
1231 =head2 v5.6.2 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
1233 L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/deb8cb9ad918716f>
1235 When great or unexpected events fall out upon the stage of this
1236 sublunary word--the mind of man, which is an inquisitive kind of
1237 a substance, naturally takes a flight, behind the scenes, to see
1238 what is the cause and first spring of them--The search was not
1239 long in this instance.
1241 =head2 v5.6.2-RC1 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
1243 L<Announced on 2003-11-08 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e3d4acc7a8dd3ce5>
1245 "Pray, my dear", quoth my mother, "have you not forgot to wind up the clock?"
1247 =head2 v5.8.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
1249 L<Announced on 2002-07-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63720.html>
1251 There was the faint sound of footsteps.
1252 "Chap with a whip got as far as the big sharp spikes last week,"
1253 said the low priest.
1254 There was a sound like the flushing of a very old dry lavatory.
1255 The footsteps stopped. The High Priest smiled to himself.
1256 "Right," he said. "See your two pebbles and raise you two pebbles."
1257 The low priest threw down his cards. "Double Onion," he said.
1258 The High Priest looked down suspiciously.
1259 The low priest consulted a scrap of paper. "That's three hundred
1260 thousand, nine hundred and sixty-four pebbles you owe me," he said.
1261 There was the sound of footsteps. The priests exchanged glances.
1262 "Haven't had one for poisoned-dart alley for quite some time,"
1263 said the High Priest.
1264 "Five says he makes it", said the low priest. "You're on."
1265 There was a faint clatter of metal points on stone.
1266 "It's a shame to take your pebbles."
1267 There were footsteps again.
1269 =head2 v5.8.0-RC3 - no epigraph
1271 L<Announced on 2002-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63234.html>
1273 =head2 v5.8.0-RC2 - no epigraph
1275 L<Announced on 2002-06-21 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg62013.html>
1277 =head2 v5.8.0-RC1 - no epigraph
1279 L<Announced on 2002-06-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg60317.html>
1281 =head2 v5.7.3 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
1283 L<Announced on 2002-03-04 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/03/msg53652.html>
1285 Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong.
1286 No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always
1287 got there first, and is waiting for it.
1289 =head2 v5.7.2 - Terry Pratchett, "Small Gods"
1291 L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/07/msg40370.html>
1293 His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools --
1294 the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans -- and summed up
1295 all three of them in his famous phrase, "You can't trust any
1296 bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing
1297 you can do about it, so let's have a drink."
1299 =head2 v5.7.1 - Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic"
1301 L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33851.html>
1303 "What happens next?" asked Twoflower.
1305 Hrun screwed a finger in his ear and inspected it absently.
1307 "Oh,", he said, "I expect in a minute the door will be
1308 flung back and I'll be dragged off to some sort of temple
1309 arena where I'll fight maybe a couple of giant spiders
1310 and an eight-foot slave from the jungles of Klatch and then
1311 I'll rescue some kind of a princess from the altar and then
1312 I'll kill off a few guards or whatever and then this girl
1313 will show me the secret passage out of the place and we'll
1314 liberate a couple of horses and escape with the treasure."
1315 Hrun leaned his head back on his hands and looked at the
1316 ceiling, whistling tunelessly.
1318 "All that?" said Twoflower.
1322 =head2 v5.6.1 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", Riddles in the Dark
1324 L<Announced on 2001-04-08 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33823.html>
1326 `What have I got in my pocket?' he said aloud. He was talking to
1327 himself, but Gollum thought it was a riddle, and he was frightfully
1330 `Not fair! not fair!' he hissed. `It isn't fair, my precious, is it,
1331 to ask us what it's got in its nassty little pocketses?'
1333 Bilbo seeing what had happened and having nothing better to ask
1334 stuck to his question, `What have I got in my pocket?' he said
1337 `S-s-s-s-s,' hissed Gollum. `It must give us three guesseses,
1338 my precious, three guesseses.'
1340 =head2 v5.6.1-foolish - no epigraph
1342 L<Announced on 2001-08-04 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33421.html>
1344 =head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL3 - I can't find the announcement
1346 No announcement available.
1348 =head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL2 - no epigraph
1350 L<Announced on 2001-01-31 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/01/msg29934.html>
1352 =head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL1 - no epigraph
1354 L<Announced on 2000-12-18 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/12/msg27738.html>
1356 =head2 v5.7.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Moving Pictures"
1358 L<Announced on 2000-09-02 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/09/msg17730.html>
1360 The Librarian had seen many weird things in his time,
1361 but that had to be the 57th strangest.
1362 [footnote: he had a tidy mind]
1364 =head2 v5.6.0 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", The Last Stage
1366 L<Announced on 2000-03-23 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10341.html>
1368 The dragon is withered,
1369 His bones are now crumbled;
1370 His armour is shivered,
1371 His splendour is humbled!
1372 Though sword shall be rusted,
1373 And throne and crown perish
1374 With strength that men trusted
1375 And wealth that they cherish,
1376 Here grass is still growing,
1377 And leaves are a yet swinging,
1378 The white water flowing,
1379 And elves are yet singing
1380 Come! Tra-la-la-lally!
1381 Come back to the valley.
1384 =head2 v5.6.0-RC3 - no epigraph
1386 L<Announced on 2000-03-22 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10140.html>
1388 =head1 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
1390 This document was originally compiled based on a list of epigraphs
1391 on L<Perl Monks|http://perlmonks.org> titled
1392 L<Recent Perl Release Announcement|http://perlmonks.org/?node_id=372406>