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3=head1 NAME
4
0e6b8110 5perlepigraphs - list of Perl release epigraphs
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6
7=head1 DESCRIPTION
8
0e6b8110 9Many Perl release announcements included an I<epigraph>, a short excerpt
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10from a literary or other creative work, chosen by the pumpking or release
11manager. This file assembles the known list of epigraph for posterity,
12and also links to the release announcements in mailing list archives.
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14I<Note>: these have also been referred to as <epigrams>, but the
15definition of I<epigraph> is closer to the way they have been used.
16Consult your favorite dictionary for details.
17
18=head1 EPIGRAPHS
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20=head2 v5.18.0 - Yevgeny Zamyatin
21
22L<Announced on 2013-05-18 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201940.html>
23
24It is an error to divide people into the living and the dead: there are people
25who are dead-alive, and people who are alive-alive. The dead-alive also write,
26walk, speak, act. But they make no mistakes; only machines make no mistakes,
27and they produce only dead things. The alive-alive are constantly in error, in
28search, in questions, in torment.
29
30=head2 v5.18.0-RC4 - Joseph Heller, Catch-22
31
32L<Announced on 2013-04-16 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201889.html>
33
34Clevinger was dead. That was the basic flaw in his philosophy.
35
36=head2 v5.18.0-RC3 - Tom Waits, "The Ocean Doesn't Want Me"
37
38L<Announced on 2013-04-14 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201823.html>
39
40 I'd love to go drowning
41 And to stay and to stay
42 But the ocean doesn't want me today
43 I'll go in up to here
44 It can't possibly hurt
45 All they will find is my beer
46 And my shirt
47
48=head2 v5.18.0-RC2 - Tom Waits, "Earth Died Screaming"
49
50L<Announced on 2013-05-12 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201723.html>
51
52 And the great day of wrath has come
53 And here's mud in your big red eye
54 The poker's in the fire
55 And the locusts take the sky
56 And the earth died screaming
57 While I lay dreaming of you
58
59=head2 v5.18.0-RC1 - Tom Waits, "What's He Building in There?"
60
61L<Announced on 2013-05-11 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201651.html>
62
63 What's he building in there?
64
65 We have a right to know…
66
67=head2 v5.17.11 - Nigel Tufnel, This is Spın̈al Tap
68
69L<Announced on 2013-04-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/04/msg201056.html>
70
71It's very special because, if you can see, the numbers all go to…
72eleven! Look, right across the board: eleven, eleven, eleven, eleven!
73
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74=head2 v5.17.10 - Vernor Vinge, A Fire Upon The Deep
75
76L<Announced on 2013-03-22 by Max Maischein|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-03/msg00908.html>
77
78The archive informed the automation. Data structures were built, recipes
79followed. A local network was built, faster than anything on Straum, but surely
80safe. Nodes were added, modified by other recipes. The archive was a friendly
81place, with hierarchies of translation keys that led them along. Straum itself
82would be famous for this.
83
84Six months passed. A year.
85
86The omniscient view. Not self-aware really. Self-awareness is much over-rated.
87Most automation works far better as a part of a whole, and even if human-
88powerful, it does not need to self-know.
89
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90=head2 v5.16.3 - Devo, Freedom of Choice
91
92L<Announced on 2013-03-11 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-03/msg00414.html>
93
94 A victim of collision on the open sea
95 Nobody ever said that life was free
96 Sink, swim, go down with the ship
97 But use your freedom of choice
98
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99=head2 v5.14.4 - Arthur C. Clarke, The Nine Billion Names of God
100
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101L<Announced on 2013-03-11 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-03/msg00393.html>
102
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103He began to sing, but gave it up after a while. This vast arena of
104mountains, gleaming like whitely hooded ghosts on every side, did not
105encourage such ebullience. Presently George glanced at his watch.
106
107'Should be there in an hour,' he called back over his shoulder to
108Chuck. Then he added, in an afterthought: 'Wonder if the computer's
109finished its run. It was due about now.'
110
111Chuck didn't reply, so George swung round in his saddle. He could just
8af848c0 112see Chuck's face, a white oval turned towards the sky.
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113
114'Look,' whispered Chuck, and George lifted his eyes to heaven. (There
115is always a last time for everything.)
116
117Overhead, without any fuss, the stars were going out.
118
119
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120=head2 v5.17.9 - Douglas Adams, The Hitch-Hikers Guide to the Galaxy
121
122L<Announced on 2013-02-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-02/msg01146.html>
123
124Vogon poetry is of course, the third worst in the universe.
125The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a
126recitation by their poet master Grunthos the Flatulent of
127his poem 'Ode To A Small Lump of Green Putty I Found In My
128Armpit One Midsummer Morning' four of his audience died
129of internal haemorrhaging and the president of the
130Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one
131of his own legs off. Grunthos is reported to have been
132'disappointed' by the poem's reception, and was about to
133embark on a reading of his twelve-book epic entitled
134'My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles' when his own major intestine,
135in a desperate attempt to save life and civilisation,
136leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain.
137
138The very worst poetry of all perished along with its creator
139Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Greenbridge, Essex, England,
140in the destruction of the planet Earth.
141
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142=head2 v5.17.8 - Iain Pears, An Instance of the Fingerpost
143
144L<Announced on 2013-01-20 by Aaron Crane|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-01/msg00518.html>
145
146I must here declare myself as someone who does not for a moment subscribe to
147the general view that a willingness to perform oneself is detrimental to the
148dignity of experimental philosophy. There is, after all, a clear distinction
149between labour carried out for financial reward, and that done for the
150improvement of mankind: to put it another way, Lower as a philosopher was
151fully my equal even if he fell away when he became the practising physician.
152I think ridiculous of certain professors of anatomy, who find it beneath
153them to pick up the knife themselves, but merely comment while hired hands
154do the cutting. Sylvius would never have dreamt of sitting on a dais reading
155from an authority while others cut E<0x2014> when he taught, the knife was
156in his hand and the blood spattered his coat. Boyle also did not scruple to
157perform his own experiments and, on one occasion in my presence, even showed
158himself willing to anatomise a rat with his very own hands. Nor was he less
159a gentleman when he had finished. Indeed, in my opinion, his stature was all
160the greater, for in Boyle wealth, humility and curiosity mingled, and the
161world is richer for it.
162
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163=head2 v5.17.7 - R. Scott Bakker, The Darkness That Comes Before
164
165L<Announced on 2012-12-18 by Dave Rolsky|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-12/msg00679.html>
166
167No thought.
168 The boy extinguished. Only a place.
169 This place.
170 Motionless, the Pragma sat facing him, the bare soles of his feet flat against each other, his dark frock scored by the shadows of deep folds, his eyes as empty as the child they watched.
171 A place without breath or sound. A place of sight alone. A place without before or after . . . almost.
172 For the first lances of sunlight careered over the glacier, as ponderous as great tree limbs in the wind. Shadows hardened and light gleamed across the Pragma’s ancient skull.
173 The old man’s left hand forsook his right sleeve, bearing a watery knife. And like a rope in water, his arm pitched outward, fingertips trailing across the blade as the knife swung languidly into the air, the sun skating and the dark shrine plunging across its mirror back . . .
174 And the place where Kellhus had once existed extended an open hand—the blond hairs like luminous filaments against tanned skin—and grasped the knife from stunned space.
175 The slap of pommel against palm triggered the collapse of place into little boy. The pale stench of his body. Breath, sound, and lurching thoughts.
176 I have been legion . . .
177 In his periphery, he could see the spike of the sun ease from the mountain. He felt drunk with exhaustion. In the recoil of his trance, it seemed all he could hear were the twigs arching and bobbing in the wind, pulled by leaves like a million sails no bigger than his hand. Cause everywhere, but amid countless minute happenings—diffuse, useless.
178 Now I understand.
179
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180=head2 v5.17.6 - Kurt Vonnegut, The Sirens of Titan
181
182L<Announced on 2012-11-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-11/msg00760.html>
183
184Beatrice, looking like a gypsy queen, smoldered at the foot of a statue
185of a young physical student. At first glance, the laboratory-gowned
186scientist seemed to be a perfect servant of nothing but truth. At first
187glance, one was convinced that nothing but truth could please him as he
188beamed at his test tube. At first glance, one thought that he was as
189much above the beastly concerns of mankind as the harmoniums in the
190caves of Mercury. There, at first glance, was a young man without
191vanity, without lust — and one accepted at its face value the title Salo
192had engraved on the statue, "Discovery of Atomic Power."
193
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194=head2 v5.12.5 - William Shakespeare, Measure for Measure
195
196Announced on 2012-11-10 by Dominic Hargreaves
197
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198 Music oft hath such a charm
199 To make bad good, and good provoke to harm.
87af396a 200
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201=head2 v5.16.2 - Stanislaw Lem, The Cyberiad, Trurl's Machine
202
203L<Announced on 2012-11-01 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-11/msg00017.html>
204
205Once upon a time Trurl the constructor built an eight-story thinking
206machine. When it was finished, he gave it a coat of white paint,
207trimmed the edges in lavender, stepped back, squinted, then added a
208little curlicue on the front and, where one might imagine the forehead
209to be, a few pale orange polkadots. Extremely pleased with himself,
e4a5e942 210he whistled an air and, as is always done on such occasions, asked it
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211the ritual question of how much is two plus two.
212
213The machine stirred. Its tubes began to glow, its coils warmed up,
214current coursed through all its circuits like a waterfall,
215transformers hummed and throbbed, there was a clanging, and a
216chugging, and such an ungodly racket that Trurl began to think of
217adding a special mentation muffler. Meanwhile the machine labored on,
218as if it had been given the most difficult problem in the Universe to
219solve; the ground shook, the sand slid underfoot from the vibration,
220valves popped like champagne corks, the relays nearly gave way under
221the strain. At last, when Trurl had grown extremely impatient, the
222machine ground to a halt and said in a voice like thunder: SEVEN!
223
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224=head2 v5.17.5 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky"
225
bc9f67ba 226L<Announced on 2012-10-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-10/msg01007.html>
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227
228Neither of them noticed the pair of polka-dotted knickers hiding
229behind the ventilation duct overhead, listening patiently and
230recording everything.
231
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232=head2 v5.17.4 - Roald Dahl, "Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf"
233
234L<Announced on 2012-09-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-09/msg01226.html>
235
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236 The small girl smiles. One eyelid flickers.
237 She whips a pistol from her knickers.
238 She aims it at the creature's head,
239 And bang bang bang, she shoots him dead.
e6a2c28f 240
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241 A few weeks later, in the wood,
242 I came across Miss Riding Hood.
243 But what a change! No cloak of red,
244 No silly hood upon her head.
245 She said, "Hello, and do please note
246 My lovely furry wolfskin coat."
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248=head2 v5.17.3 - Kris Ta-belle, "Smoked Perl Onion Soup"
249
250L<Announced on 2012-08-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/08/msg190775.html>
251
252Preparation:
253
254Cut 16 Perl Onions into quarters and put them in a grill smoker rack
255or a perforated pan over a BBQ using hickory wood chips or Special
256Blend Smoker Bisquettes. Smoke them for an hour and remove once they
257look golden brown.
258Let them cool and put them in the fridge (or freezer) until you are
259ready to create the soup.
260
261Ingredients:
262
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263 16 diced, pre-smoked, Perl Onions
264 3 tbsp butter
265 1/4 cup olive oil
266 2 small garlic cloves, finely minced
267 1 tsp salt
268 1 tsp sugar
269 black pepper to taste
270 1 cup red wine
271 1/4 cup all purpose flour
272 6 cups of beef or vegetable stock
273 1 cup of thick cream (milk can be used as a substitute)
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274
275Method:
276
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277 Melt the butter in a pan and then add olive oil.
278 Heat and add the onions to caramelize over a medium-high heat for up
279 to half an hour.
280 Add the garlic, turn down the heat and cook for a further 5 minutes.
281 Add the salt, pepper and sugar.
282 Now add the red wine and reduce to a jam like consistency.
283 Add the flour, stir well and add the stock a cup at a time.
284 Simmer for 30 minutes, add the cream and heat to almost boiling.
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285
286Enjoy.
287
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288=head2 v5.17.2 - Terry Pratchet, "The Colour of Magic"
289
3d76f962 290L<Announced on 2012-07-21 by TonyC|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/07/msg189828.html>
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291
292‘I knew it,’ said Rincewind. ‘We're in a strong magical field.’
293
294Twoflower and Hrun looked around the little hollow where they had made
295their noonday halt. Then they looked at each other.
296
297The horses were quietly cropping the rich grass by the stream. Yellow
298butterflies skittered among the bushes. There was a smell of thyme
299and a buzzing of bees. The wild pigs on the spit sizzled gently.
300
301Hrun shrugged and went back to oiling his biceps. They gleamed.
302
303‘Looks alright to me,’ he said.
304
305‘Try tossing a coin,’ said Rincewind.
306
307‘What?’
308
309‘Go on. Toss a coin.’
310
311‘Hokay,’ said Hrun. 'If that gives you any pleasure.’ He reached into
312his pouch and withdrew a handful of loose change plundered from a
313dozen realms. With some care he selected a Zchloty leaden
314quarter-iotum and balanced it on a purple thumbnail.
315
316‘You call,’ he said. ‘Heads or—’ he inspected the obverse with
317an air of intense concentration, ‘some sort of a fish with legs.’
318
319‘When it's in the air,’ said Rincewind. Hrun grinned and flicked his thumb.
320
321The iotum rose, spinning.
322
323‘Edge,’ said Rincewind, without looking at it.
324
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325=head2 v5.17.1 - Rand Miller, "Myst: The Book of Ti'ana"
326
327L<Announced on 2012-06-20 by doy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/06/msg188354.html>
328
329On their return from Ko'ah, Aitrus had shown her the Book, patiently
330taking her through page after page, and showing her how such an Age was
331"made." She had seen at once the differences between this archaic form
332and the ordinary written speech of the D'ni, noting how it was not
333merely more elaborate but more specific: a language of precise yet
334subtle descriptive power. Yet seeing was one thing, believing another.
335Given all the evidence, her rational mind still fought against accepting
336it.
337
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338=head2 v5.17.0 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky"
339
f51b9d59 340L<Announced on 2012-05-26 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/05/msg187214.html>
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341
342`Welcome, comrades!' Burya opened his arms toward the soldier.
343`Yes it is true! With help from our allies of the Festival, the iron
344hand of the reactionary junta is about to be overthrown for all time!
345The new economy is being born; the marginal cost of production has
346been abolished, and from now on, if any item is produced once, it can
347be replicated infinitely. From each according to his imagination,
348to each according to his needs! Join us or better still, bring your
349fellow soldiers and workers to join us!'
350
351There was a sharp bang from the roof of the Corn Exchange, right at the
352climax of his impromptu speech; heads turned in alarm. Something had
353broken inside the spork factory and a stream of rainbow-hued plastic
354implements fountained toward the sky and clattered to the cobblestones
355on every side, like a harbinger of the postindustrial society to come.
356Workers and peasants alike stared in open-mouthed bewilderment at this
357astounding display of productivity, then bent to scrabble in the muck
358for the brightly colored sporks of revolution. A volley of shots rang
359out and Burya Rubenstein raised his hands, grinning wildly, to accept
360the salute of the soldiers from the Skull Hill garrison.
361
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362=head2 v5.16.1 - Emerald Rose - Never Split The Party
363
364L<Announced on 2012-08-08 by Ricardo
365Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-08/msg00307.html>
366
367 Don't you know? You never split the party
368 Clerics in the back to keep those fighters hale and hearty
369 The wizard in the middle, where he can shed some light
370 And you never let that damn thief out of sight…
371
372 -- Emerald Rose, Never Split The Party
373
374=head2 v5.16.1 RC1 - Tom Moldvay - Dungeons & Dragons
375
376L<Announced on 2012-08-03 by Ricardo
377Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-08/msg00157.html>
378
379I was busy rescuing the captured maiden when the dragon showed up.
380Fifty feed of scaled terror glared down at us with smoldering red eyes.
381Tendrils of smoke drifted out from between fangs larger than daggers.
382The dragon blocked the only exit from the cave.
383
384
385
386I unwrapped the sword which the mysterious cleric had given me. The
387sword was golden-tinted steel. Its hilt was set with a rainbow
388collection of precious gems. I shouted my battle cry and charged
389
390My charge caught the dragon by surprise. Its titanic jaws snapped shut
391inches from my face. I swung the golden sword with both arms. The
392swordblade bit into the dragon's neck and continued through to the other
393side. With an earth-shaking crash, the dragon dropped dead at my feet.
394The magic sword had saved my life and ended the reign of the
395dragon-tyrant. The countryside was freed and I could return as a hero.
396
397 -- Tom Moldvay, Foreward to the Dungeons & Dragons Basic Rulebook
398
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399=head2 v5.16.0 - W.H. Auden - September 1, 1939
400
401L<Announced on 2012-05-20 by Ricardo
402Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-05/msg00728.html>
403
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404 All I have is a voice
405 To undo the folded lie,
406 The romantic lie in the brain
407 Of the sensual man-in-the-street
408 And the lie of Authority
409 Whose buildings grope the sky:
410 There is no such thing as the State
411 And no one exists alone;
412 Hunger allows no choice
413 To the citizen or the police;
414 We must love one another or die.
415
416 -- W.H. Auden, September 1, 1939
4c4c16b2 417
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418=head2 v5.15.9 - Bob Dylan - Blowin' In The Wind
419
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420L<Announced on 2012-03-20 by
421Abigail|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/184824>
422
423 How many roads must a man walk down
424 Before you call him a man?
425 Yes, 'n' how many seas must a white dove sail
426 Before she sleeps in the sand?
427 Yes, 'n' how many times must the cannonballs fly
428 Before they're forever banned?
429 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
430 The answer is blowin' in the wind
431
432 How many years can a mountain exist
433 Before it's washed to the sea?
434 Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
435 Before they're allowed to be free?
436 Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head
437 Pretending he just doesn't see?
438 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
439 The answer is blowin' in the wind
440
441 How many times must a man look up
442 Before he can see the sky?
443 Yes, 'n' how many ears must one man have
444 Before he can hear people cry?
445 Yes, 'n' how many deaths will it take till he knows
446 That too many people have died?
447 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
448 The answer is blowin' in the wind
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449
450 -- Bob Dylan, Spring 1962
451
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452=head2 v5.15.8 - The KLF - The Manual-How To Have A Number One The Easy Way
453
454L<Announced on 2012-02-20 by Max
455Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/02/msg183919.html>
456
457 "Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
458 Doctor Who, in the Tardis
459 Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
460 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who
461 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who"
462
463Gibberish of course, but every lad in the country under a certain
464age related instinctively to what it was about. The ones slightly
465older needed a couple of pints inside them to clear away the mind
466debris left by the passing years before it made sense. As for
467girls and our chorus, we think they must have seen it as pure crap.
468A fact that must have limited to zero our chances of staying at The
469Top for more than one week.
470
471Stock, Aitkin and Waterman, however, are kings of writing chorus
472lyrics that go straight to the emotional heart of the 7" single
473buying girls in this country. Their most successful records will kick
474into the chorus with a line which encapsulates the entire emotional
475meaning of the song. This will obviously be used as the title. As
476soon as Rick Astley hit the first line of the chorus on his debut
477single it was all over - the Number One position was guaranteed:
478
479 "I'm never going to give you up"
480
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481=head2 v5.15.7 - Penelope Lively, The Voyage of QV66
482
483L<Announced on 2012-01-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams
484|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/01/msg182230.html>
485
486"Laboratories," announced Henry. "Kindly don't touch anything."
487
488He led us into a long low brick shed. Outside there was a
489notice on a piece of board, crudely printed in red paint,
490which said GRATE SIENCE DISCOVERYS DONE HERE SSSH! BRING YOUR
491OWN BUKKIT NO PINCHING ANYWUN ELSE'S EXPERRYMENTS CANTEEN OPEN
492ALL DAY CHIMPS ONLY.
493
494There were a lot of large black monkeys inside, all intently
495busy on what they were doing. Some of them were pouring stuff
496out of bottles into buckets and carefully stirring the ensuing
497mixture; others were at work with glass tubes and jars, blowing
498and measuring and mixing; others were crouched over long benches
499with tools and heaps of bits and pieces of metal, cutting and
500bending and constructing. There was a great deal of noise and
501chatter. Every now and then one of them would give a whoop of
502excitement and all the others would gather round and jump up and
503down cheering and applauding.
504
505"Chimps," said Henry. "They're awfully clever."
506
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507=head2 v5.15.6 - Ursula K. Leguin, A Wizard of Earthsea
508
489db6ed
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509L<Announced on 2011-12-20 by Dave
510Rolsky|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/12/msg180962.html>
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511
512Ged had thought that as the prentice of a great mage he would enter at once
513into the mystery and mastery of power. He would understand the language of the
514beasts and the speech of the leaves of the forest, he thought, and sway the
515winds with his word, and learn to change himself into any shape he
516wished. Maybe he and his master would run together as stags, or fly to Re Albi
517over the mountain on the wings of eagles.
518
519But it was not so at all. They wandered, first down into the Vale and then
520gradually south and westward around the mountain, given lodging in little
521villages or spending the night out in the wilderness, like poor
522journeyman-sorcerers, or tinkers, or beggars. They entered no mysterious
523domain. Nothing happened. The mage's oaken staff that Ged had watched at first
524with eager dread was nothing but a stout staff to walk with. Three days went
525by and four days went by and still Ogion had not spoken a single charm in
526Ged's hearing, and had not taught him a single name or rune or spell.
527
d0fc7727
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528=head2 v5.15.5 - Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman
529
530L<Announced on 2011-11-20 by Steve
531Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/11/msg179588.html>
532
533This day - is a day of the greatest solemnity! Spain has a king. He has
534been found. I am that king. Only this very day did I learn of it. I
535confess, it came to me suddenly in a flash of lightning. I don't understand
536how I could have thought and imagined that I was a titular councillor. How
537could such a wild notion enter my head? It's a good thing no one thought of
538putting me in an insane asylum. Now everything is laid open before me. Now
539I see everything as on the palm of my hand. And before, I don't understand,
540before everything around me was in some sort of fog. And all this happens, I
541think, because people imagine that the human brain is in the head. Not at
542all: it is brought by a wind from the direction of the Caspian Sea. First
543off, I announced to Mavra who I am. When she heard that the king of Spain
544was standing before her, she clasped her hands and nearly died of fright.
545The stupid woman had never seen a king of Spain before. However, I
546endeavoured to calm her down and assured her in gracious words of my
547benevolence and that I was not at all angry that she sometimes polished my
548boots poorly. They're benighted folk. It's impossible to tell them about
549lofty matters. She got frightened because she's convinced that all kings of
550Spain are like Philip II. But I explained to her that there was no
551resemblance between me and Philip II, and that I didn't have a single
552Capuchin . . . I didn't go to the office . . . To hell with it! No friends,
553you won't lure me there now; I'm not going to copy your vile papers!
554
555 -- Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman,
556 trans. Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky
557
1542e678
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558=head2 v5.15.4 - Steve Jobs
559
560L<Announced on 2011-10-20 by Florian
561Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/10/msg178412.html>
562
563A lot of people in our industry haven't had very diverse experiences. So they
564don't have enough dots to connect, and they end up with very linear solutions
565without a broad perspective on the problem. The broader one's understanding of
566the human experience, the better design we will have.
567
413f5093
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568=head2 v5.14.3 - William Shakespeare, As You Like It
569
0bce251c 570L<Announced on 2012-10-12 by Dominic Hargreaves|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/10/msg194057.html>
413f5093
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571
572 The poor world is almost six thousand years old, and in all
573 this time there was not any man died in his own person,
574 videlicit, in a love-cause. Troilus had his brains dashed
575 out with a Grecian club; yet he did what he could to die
576 before, and he is one of the patterns of love. Leander, he
577 would have lived many a fair year, though Hero had turned
578 nun, if it had not been for a hot midsummer night; for, good
579 youth, he went but forth to wash him in the Hellespont and
580 being taken with the cramp was drowned and the foolish
581 coroners of that age found it was 'Hero of Sestos.' But these
582 are all lies: men have died from time to time and worms have
583 eaten them, but not for love.
584
585 -- As You Like It, William Shakespeare
586
c684cf36 587=head2 v5.14.2 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
21677d22
FR
588
589L<Announced on 2011-09-26 by Florian
590Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177618.html>
591
592
593It's not so much that people don't value the programs after they have them--they
594do value them. But they're not the sort of thing that would ever catch on if
595they had to overcome the marketing barrier. (I don't yet know if perl will
596catch on at all--I'm worried enough about it that I specifically included an
597awk-to-perl translator just to help it catch on.) Maybe it's all just an
598inferiority complex. Or maybe I don't like to be mercenary.
599
600So I guess I'd say that the reason some software comes free is that the
601mechanism for selling it is missing, either from the work environment, or from
602the heart of the programmer.
603
604
607b15aa
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605=head2 v5.15.3 - Oscar Wilde, All Art is Quite Useless
606
ca420de3
SL
607L<Announced on 2011-09-20 by Stevan
608Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177427.html>
609
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610 All art is at once surface and symbol. Those who go beneath
611 the surface do so at their peril. Those who read the symbol
612 do so at their peril.
613
614 It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors.
615 Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the
616 work is new, complex, and vital. When critics disagree, the
617 artist is in accord with himself.
618
619 We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as
620 he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless
621 thing is that one admires it intensely.
622
623 All art is quite useless.
624
625 -- Oscar Wilde, From the preface to The Picture of Dorian Gray
626
627
bfb65171
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628=head2 v5.15.2 - Rainer Maria Rilke, The Third Duina Elegy
629
630L<Announced on 2011-08-20 by Ricardo
631Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-08/msg00694.html>
632
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633 True, it is strange to live no more on earth,
634 no longer follow the folkways scarecely learned;
635 not to give roses and other especially auspicious
636 things the significance of a human future;
637 to be no more what one was in infinitely anxious hands,
638 and to put aside even one's name, like a broken plaything.
639 Strange, to wish wishes no longer. Strange, to see
640 all that was related fluttering so loosely in space.
641 And being dead is hard, full of catching-up,
642 so that finally one feels a little eternity.–
643 But the living all make the mistake of too sharp discrimination.
644 Often angels (it's said) don't know if they move
645 among the quick or the dead. The eternal current
646 hurtles all ages along with it forever
647 through both realms and drowns their voices in both.
bfb65171
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648
649 -- Rainer Maria Rilke, Duino, The First Elegy
650 trans., C. F. MacIntyre
651
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652=head2 v5.15.1 - Greg Egan, "Permutation City"
653
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655
656Carter held out a hand towards the middle of the room. `See that
657fountain?' A ten-metre-wide marble wedding cake, topped with a
658winged cherub wrestling a serpent, duly appeared. Water cascaded
659down from a gushing wound in the cherub's neck. Carter said, `It's
660being computed by redundancies in the sketch of the city. I can
661extract the results, because I know exactly where to look for them --
662but nobody else would have a hope in hell of picking them out.'
663
664Peer walked up to the fountain. Even as he approached, he noticed
665that the spray was intangible; when he dipped his hand in the water
666around the base he felt nothing, and the motion he made with his
667fingers left the foaming surface unchanged. They were spying on
668the calculations, not interacting with them; the fountain was a
669closed system.
670
671Carter said, `In your case, of course, nobody will need to know
672the results. Except you -- and you'll know them because you'll
673/be/ them.'
674
452ead5e
DG
675=head2 v5.15.0 - Neil Gaiman, "The Graveyard Book"
676
677L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173748.html>
678
679 If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all
680 you will have gained.
681
b3c5102d
LB
682=head2 v5.12.4 - William Schwenck Gilbert, "Trial By Jury"
683
684L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173725.html>
685
5814c912
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686 You cannot eat breakfast all day,
687 Nor is it the act of a sinner,
688 When breakfast is taken away,
689 To turn his attention to dinner;
690 And it's not in the range of belief,
691 To look upon him as a glutton,
692 Who, when he is tired of beef,
693 Determines to tackle the mutton.
694 Ah! But this I am willing to say,
695 If it will appease her sorrow,
696 I'll marry this lady today,
697 And I'll marry the other tomorrow!
b3c5102d 698
c684cf36 699=head2 v5.14.1 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
901b3fdb
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700
701L<Announced on 2011-06-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173650.html>
702
703At this point I'm no longer working for a company that makes me sign
704my life away, but by now I'm in the habit. Besides, I still harbor
705the deep-down suspicion that nobody would pay money for what I write,
706since most of it just helps you do something better that you could
707already do some other way. How much money would you personally pay
708to upgrade from readnews to rn? How much money would you pay for
709the patch program? As for warp, it's a mere game. And anything you
710can do with perl you can eventually do with an amazing and totally
711unreadable conglomeration of awk, sed, sh and C.
712
713=head2 v5.12.4-RC2 - James Russell Lowell, "Eleanor makes macaroons"
714
715L<Announced on 2011-06-15 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173609.html>
716
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717 Now for sugar, -- nay, our plan
718 Tolerates no work of man.
719 Hurry, then, ye golden bees;
720 Fetch your clearest honey, please,
721 Garnered on a Yorkshire moor,
722 While the last larks sing and soar,
723 From the heather-blossoms sweet
724 Where sea-breeze and sunshine meet,
725 And the Augusts mask as Junes, --
726 Eleanor makes macaroons!
901b3fdb 727
7fdfa5b9
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728=head2 v5.12.4-RC1 - Ogden Nash, "The Clean Plater"
729
730L<Announced on 2011-06-08 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173352.html>
731
5814c912
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732 Pheasant is pleasant, of course,
733 And terrapin, too, is tasty,
734 Lobster I freely endorse,
735 In pate or patty or pasty.
736 But there's nothing the matter with butter,
737 And nothing the matter with jam,
738 And the warmest greetings I utter
739 To the ham and the yam and the clam.
740 For they're food,
741 All food,
742 And I think very fondly of food.
743 Through I'm broody at times
744 When bothered by rhymes,
745 I brood
746 On food.
7fdfa5b9 747
c684cf36 748=head2 v5.14.0 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
8b55b028
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749
750L<Announced on 2011-05-14 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172326.html>
751
752At the start of any project, I'm programming primarily to please
753myself. (The two chief virtues in a programmer are laziness and
754impatience.) After a while somebody looks over my shoulder and says,
755"That's neat. It'd be neater if it did such-and-so." So the thing
756gets neater. Pretty soon (a year or two) I have an rn, a warp, a patch,
757or a perl. One of these years I'll have a metaconfig.
758
759I then say to myself, "I don't want my life's work to die when this
760computer is scrapped, so I should let some other people use this. If I
761ask my company to sell this, it'll never see the light of day, and nobody
762would pay much for it anyway. If I sell it myself, I'll be in trouble with
763my company, to whom I signed my life away when I was hired. If I give it
764away, I can pretend it was worthless in the first place, so my company
765won't care. In any event, it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission."
766
767So a freely distributable program is born.
768
769=head2 v5.14.0-RC3 - American Airlines Gate Agent, last call
770
771L<Announced on 2011-05-11 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172282.html>
772
773This is the last call for flight 1697 with service to Chicago and
774continuing service to San Francisco. All passengers should already be
775aboard. If you aren't aboard at this time, you will be denied boarding
776and your bags will be offloaded.
777
778=head2 v5.14.0-RC2 - Greg Grandin, Fordlandia, "the Rise and Fall of Henry Ford's Forgotten Jungle City"
779
780L<Announced on 2011-05-04 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg171879.html>
781
782Over the course of nearly two decades, Ford would spend tens of millions
783of dollars founding not one but, after the plantation was defastated
784by leaf blight, two American towns, complete with central squares,
785sidewalks, indoor plumbing, hospitals, manicured lawns, movie theaters,
786swimming pools, golf courses, and, of course, Model Ts and As rolling
787down their paved streets.
788
789Back in America, newspapers kept up their drumbeat celebration, only
790obliquely referencing reports that things were not progressing as the
791company had hoped. But there was one note of skepticism. In late 1928,
792the Washington Post ran an editorial that read in its entirety: "Ford will
793govern a rubber plantation in Brazil larger than North Carolina. This is
794the first time he has applied quantity production methods to trouble"
795
796=head2 v5.14.0-RC1 - Bill Bryson, "In a Sunburned Country"
797
798L<Announced on 2011-04-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/04/msg171253.html>
799
800But then Australia is such a difficult country to keep track of. On
801my first visit, some years ago, I passed the time on the long flight
802reading a history of Australian politics in the twentieth century,
803wherein I encountered the startling fact that in 1967 the prime minister,
804Harold Holt, was strolling along a beach in Victoria when he plunged into
805the surf and vanished. No trace of the poor man was ever seen again.
806This seemed doubly astounding to meE<0x2014>first that Australia could
807just I<lose> a prime minister (I mean, come on) and second that news of
808this had never reached me.
809
04496198
FR
810=head2 v5.13.11 - Walt Whitman, L<Leaves of Grass|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leaves_of_Grass>
811
812L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-03/msg00560.html>
813
814 When the full-grown poet came,
815 Out spake pleased Nature (the round impassive globe, with all its
816 shows of day and night,) saying, He is mine;
817 But out spake too the Soul of man, proud, jealous and unreconciled,
818 Nay he is mine alone;
819 --Then the full-grown poet stood between the two, and took each
820 by the hand;
821 And to-day and ever so stands, as blender, uniter, tightly holding hands,
822 Which he will never release until he reconciles the two,
823 And wholly and joyously blends them.
824
c7bed260 825=head2 v5.13.10 - Egill Skalla-Grímsson, L<Egils saga Skalla-Grímssonar|http://www.heimskringla.no/wiki/Egils_saga_Skalla-Gr%C3%ADmssonar>
f1e17f6f 826
fbc70a9e 827L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Ævar Arnfjörð Bjarmason|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/02/msg169340.html>
30688243 828
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829 Skalat maðr rúnar rísta,
830 nema ráða vel kunni.
831 Þat verðr mörgum manni,
832 es of myrkvan staf villisk.
833 Sák á telgðu talkni
834 tíu launstafi ristna.
835 Þat hefr lauka lindi
f1e17f6f 836 langs ofrtrega fengit.
30688243 837
79af17bd
AB
838=head2 v5.13.9 - John F Kennedy, L<Inaugural Address January 20, 1961|http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/John_F._Kennedy%27s_Inaugural_Address>
839
840L<Announced on 2011-01-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168335.html>
841
842In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been
843granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I
844do not shrink from this responsibility -- I welcome it. I do not believe
845that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other
846generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this
847endeavor will light our country and all who serve it. And the glow from
848that fire can truly light the world.
849
850And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you;
851ask what you can do for your country.
852
853My fellow citizens of the world, ask not what America will do for you,
854but what together we can do for the freedom of man.
855
856Finally, whether you are citizens of America or citizens of the world,
857ask of us here the same high standards of strength and sacrifice which
858we ask of you. With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history
859the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth to lead the land we love,
860asking His blessing and His help, but knowing that here on earth God's
861work must truly be our own.
862
94521723
Z
863=head2 v5.13.8 - Roger Williams, L<"The Fifth Gift"|http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/8/19/21304/8493>
864
2831a86c
ZA
865L<Announced on 2010-12-19 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/12/msg167271.html>
866
94521723
Z
867The aliens called the box a "matter generator," but we'd be more inclined
868to call it a matter duplicator. By connecting switches and potentiometers
869between the copper posts it was possible to make the box mark off two
870cubic rectangular areas of volume. Make a certain contact, and these
871areas would be isolated within perfectly reflective fields. They could
872be expanded or contracted by altering resistances between other posts.
873As I worked out the user interface I built a little control panel for
874the device. It was actually a clever way for the aliens to do things;
875instead of trying to build controls we could use, they built us an
876interface we could attach to controls that made sense to us. It could
877also be automated.
878
879Once you had made the contact that established the shielded volumes,
880if you made another certain contact the contents of the first volume
881were copied to the second. The machine copied metal, plastic, steel,
882and diamond with equal ease. Copies of copies of copies of copies were
883indistinguishable from the originals at any magnification, even using
884techniques like X-ray crystallography.
885
6b1649d0
CBW
886=head2 v5.13.7 - Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski, 'The Matrix'
887
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888L<Announced on 2010-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/11/msg166162.html>
889
6b1649d0
CBW
890[Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one]
891
5814c912 892 Neo: Whoa. Deja vu.
6b1649d0
CBW
893
894[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
895
5814c912
RS
896 Trinity: What did you just say?
897 Neo: Nothing. Just had a little deja vu.
898 Trinity: What did you see?
899 Cypher: What happened?
89550e55
RS
900 Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just
901 like it.
5814c912
RS
902 Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat?
903 Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure.
904 Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
905 Neo: What is it?
89550e55
RS
906 Trinity: A deja vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when
907 they change something.
6b1649d0 908
54cc2c9a
TM
909=head2 v5.13.6 - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore"
910
2831a86c
ZA
911L<Announced on 2010-10-20 by Tatsuhiko Miyagawa|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/10/msg165183.html>
912
54cc2c9a
TM
913The boy called Crow softly rests a hand on my shoulder, and with that
914he storm vanishes.
915
916"From now on -- no matter what -- you've got to be the world's toughest
917fifteen-year-old. That's the only way you're going to survive. And in order
918to do that, you've got to figure out what it means to be tough. You following
919me?"
920
921I keep my eyes closed and don't reply. I just want to sink off into sleep
922like this, his hand on my shoulder. I hear the faint flutter of wings.
923
924"You're going to be the world's toughest fifteen-year-old," Crow whispers
925as I try to fall asleep. Like he was carving the words in a deep blue tattoo
926on my heart.
927
928(Translated from Japanese by Philip Gabriel)
929
f6c56125
SH
930=head2 v5.13.5 - Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, "The Room in the Dragon Volant"
931
2831a86c
ZA
932L<Announced on 2010-09-19 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg164238.html>
933
f6c56125
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934Candle in hand I stepped in. I do not know whether the quality of
935air, long undisturbed, is peculiar; to me it has always seemed so, and
936the damp smell of the old masonry hung in this atmosphere. My candle
937faintly lighted the bare stone wall that enclosed the stair, the foot
938of which I could not see. Down I went, and a few turns brought me to
939the stone floor. Here was another door, of the simple, old, oak kind,
940deep sunk in the thickness of the wall. The large end of the key
941fitted this. The lock was stiff; I set the candle down upon the
942stair, and applied both hands; it turned with difficulty, and as it
943revolved, uttered a shriek that alarmed me for my secret.
944
945For some minutes I did not move. In a little time, however, I took
946courage, and opened the door. The night-air floating in puffed out
947the candle. There was a thicket of holly and underwood, as dense as a
948jungle, close about the door. I should have been in pitch-darkness,
949were it not that through the topmost leaves there twinkled, here and
950there, a glimmer of moonshine.
951
952Softly, lest any one should have opened his window at the sound of the
953rusty bolt, I struggled through this till I gained a view of the open
954grounds. Here I found that the brushwood spread a good way up the
955park, uniting with the wood that approached the little temple I have
806849f8 956described.
f6c56125 957
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958=head2 v5.13.4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
959
2831a86c
ZA
960L<Announced on 2010-08-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163150.html>
961
fdea69f9
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962`How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought Alice;
963`I might as well be at school at once.' However, she got up, and began to repeat
964it, but her head was so full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what
965she was saying, and the words came very queer indeed:--
966
967 "'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare,
968 "You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair."
969 As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose
970 Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.'
971
972
973`That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' said the Gryphon.
974
975`Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it sounds uncommon
976nonsense.'
977
978Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if
979anything would ever happen in a natural way again.
980
981`I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle.
982
983`She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with the next verse.'
984
985`But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How could he turn them out
986with his nose, you know?'
987
988`It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was dreadfully puzzled by
989the whole thing, and longed to change the subject.
990
0feeb912
DG
991=head2 v5.13.3 - Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, "Good Omens"
992
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993L<Announced on 2010-07-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/07/msg162230.html>
994
0feeb912
DG
995Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading towards
996Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would
997notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth,
998for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his
999sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint.
1000
1001Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was
1002dammned if he wasn't going to finish it in the Bentley as well.
1003Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of
1004motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage
1005Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn't have been able to tell
1006that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it
1007had ever even been a car.
1008
1009There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have
1010been black, where it wasn't a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but
1011this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of
1012flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult
1013re-entry.
1014
1015There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the
1016metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still
1017somhow riding an inch above the road surface this didn't seem to
1018make an awful lot of difference to the suspension.
1019
1020It should have fallen apart miles back.
1021
3c55f444
MT
1022=head2 v5.13.2 - Iain M Banks, "Use of Weapons"
1023
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ZA
1024L<Announced on 2010-06-22 by Matt S Trout|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/06/msg161112.html>
1025
51caa79e
DG
1026We deal in the moral equivalent of black holes, where the normal laws -
1027the rules of right and wrong that people imagine apply everywhere else
1028in the universe - break down; beyond those metaphysical event-horizons,
3c55f444
MT
1029there exist ... special circumstances.
1030
1031=head2 v5.13.1 - Miguel de Unamuno, "The Sepulchre of Don Quixote"
d069c093 1032
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1033L<Announced on 2010-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160275.html>
1034
d069c093
RS
1035And if anyone shall come to you and say that he knows how to construct
1036bridges and that perhaps a time will come when you will wish to avail
1037yourself of his science in order to cross over a river, out with him! Out
1038with the engineer! Rivers will be crossed by wading or swimming them, even
1039if half the crusaders drown themselves. Let the engineer go off and build
1040bridges somewhere else, where they are badly wanted. For those who go in
1041quest of the sepulchre, faith is bridge enough.
1042
c7bed260
Z
1043=head2 v5.13.0 - Jules Verne, "A Journey to the Centre of the Earth"
1044
1045L<Announced on 2010-04-20 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg159275.html>
1046
1047The heat still remained at quite a supportable degree. With an
1048involuntary shudder, I reflected on what the heat must have been
1049when the volcano of Sneffels was pouring its smoke, flames, and
1050streams of boiling lava -- all of which must have come up by the
1051road we were now following. I could imagine the torrents of hot
1052seething stone darting on, bubbling up with accompaniments of
1053smoke, steam, and sulphurous stench!
1054
1055"Only to think of the consequences," I mused, "if the old
1056volcano were once more to set to work."
1057
1058=head2 v5.12.3 - Howard W. Campbell, Jr., "Reflections on Not Participating in Current Events"
1059
1060L<Announced on 2011-01-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168368.html>
1061
1062 I saw a huge steam roller,
1063 It blotted out the sun.
1064 The people all lay down, lay down;
1065 They did not try to run.
1066 My love and I, we looked amazed
1067 Upon the gory mystery.
1068 'Lie down, lie down!' the people cried.
1069 'The great machine is history!'
1070 My love and I, we ran away,
1071 The engine did not find us.
1072 We ran up to a mountain top,
1073 Left history far behind us.
1074 Perhaps we should have stayed and died,
1075 But somehow we don't think so.
1076 We went to see where history'd been,
1077 And my, the dead did stink so.
1078
1079=head2 v5.12.2 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
1080
1081L<Announced on 2010-09-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg163852.html>
1082
1083CPUs. Cayce Pollard Units. That's what Damien calls the clothing
1084she wears. CPUs are either black, white, or gray, and ideally
1085seem to have come into this world without human intervention.
1086
1087What people take for relentless minimalism is a side effect
1088of too much exposure to the reactor-cores of fashion. This
1089has resulted in a remorseless paring-down of what she can and
1090will wear. She is, literally, allergic to fashion. She can
1091only tolerate things that could have been worn, to a general
1092lack of comment, during any year between 1945 and 2000. She's a
1093design-free zone, a one-woman school of and whose very austerity
1094periodically threatens to spawn its own cult.
1095
1096=head2 v5.12.2-RC1 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
1097
1098L<Announced on 2010-08-31 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163670.html>
1099
1100The front page opens, familiar as a friend's living room. A frame-grab
1101from #48 serves as backdrop, dim and almost monochrome, no characters in
1102view. This is one of the sequences that generate comparisons with
1103Tarkovsky. She only knows Tarkovsky from stills, really, though she did
1104once fall asleep during a screening of The Stalker, going under on an
1105endless pan, the camera aimed straight down, in close-up, at a puddle on
1106a ruined mosaic floor. But she is not one of those who think that much
1107will be gained by analysis of the maker's imagined influences. The cult
1108of the footage is rife with subcults, claiming every possible influence.
1109Truffaut, Peckinpah -- The Peckinpah people, among the least likely, are
1110still waiting for the guns to be drawn.
1111
4363636d
DG
1112=head2 v5.12.1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
1113
2831a86c
ZA
1114L<Announced on 2010-05-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160109.html>
1115
4363636d
DG
1116"Now suppose," chortled Dr. Breed, enjoying himself, "that there were
1117many possible ways in which water could crystallize, could freeze.
d517a16a
Z
1118Suppose that the sort of ice we skate upon and put into highballs --
1119what we might call ice-one -- is only one of several types of ice.
4363636d
DG
1120Suppose water always froze as ice-one on Earth because it had never
1121had a seed to teach it how to form ice-two, ice-three, ice-four
1122...? And suppose," he rapped on his desk with his old hand again,
d517a16a
Z
1123"that there were one form, which we will call ice-nine -- a crystal as
1124hard as this desk -- with a melting point of, let us say, one-hundred
4363636d
DG
1125degrees Fahrenheit, or, better still, a melting point of one-hundred-
1126and-thirty degrees."
1127
4363636d
DG
1128=head2 v5.12.1-RC2 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
1129
2831a86c
ZA
1130L<Announced on 2010-05-13 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160066.html>
1131
4363636d
DG
1132San Lorenzo was fifty miles long and twenty miles wide, I learned from
1133the supplement to the New York Sunday Times. Its population was four
1134hundred, fifty thousand souls, "...all fiercely dedicated to the ideals
1135of the Free World."
1136
1137Its highest point, Mount McCabe, was eleven thousand feet above sea
1138level. Its capital was Bolivar, "...a strikingly modern city built on a
1139harbor capable of sheltering the entire United States Navy." The principal
1140exports were sugar, coffee, bananas, indigo, and handcrafted novelties.
1141
2831a86c
ZA
1142=head2 v5.12.1-RC1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
1143
1144L<Announced on 2010-05-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg159971.html>
4363636d 1145
4363636d
DG
1146Which brings me to the Bokononist concept of a wampeter. A wampeter is
1147the pivot of a karass. No karass is without a wampeter, Bokonon tells us,
1148just as no wheel is without a hub. Anything can be a wampeter: a tree,
1149a rock, an animal, an idea, a book, a melody, the Holy Grail. Whatever
1150it is, the members of its karass revolve about it in the majestic chaos
1151of a spiral nebula. The orbits of the members of a karass about their
1152common wampeter are spiritual orbits, naturally. It is souls and not
1153bodies that revolve. As Bokonon invites us to sing:
1154
1155 Around and around and around we spin,
1156 With feet of lead and wings of tin . . .
1157
4363636d
DG
1158=head2 v5.12.0 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1159
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ZA
1160L<Announced on 2010-04-12 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158820.html>
1161
4363636d
DG
1162'Please would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, for she was
1163not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, 'why
1164your cat grins like that?'
1165
1166'It's a Cheshire cat,' said the Duchess, 'and that's why. Pig!'
1167
1168She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite
1169jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby,
1170and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:--
1171
1172'I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know
1173that cats COULD grin.'
1174
1175'They all can,' said the Duchess; 'and most of 'em do.'
1176
4363636d
DG
1177=head2 v5.12.0-RC5 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1178
2831a86c
ZA
1179L<Announced on 2010-04-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158720.html>
1180
4363636d
DG
1181'Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly; 'some of the words
1182have got altered.'
1183
1184'It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar decidedly, and
1185there was silence for some minutes.
1186
4363636d
DG
1187=head2 v5.12.0-RC4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1188
2831a86c
ZA
1189L<Announced on 2010-04-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158567.html>
1190
4363636d
DG
1191'It was much pleasanter at home,' thought poor Alice, 'when one wasn't
1192always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and
1193rabbits. I almost wish I hadn't gone down that rabbit-hole--and yet--and
1194yet--it's rather curious, you know, this sort of life! I do wonder what
1195can have happened to me! When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that
1196kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one!
1197
4363636d
DG
1198=head2 v5.12.0-RC3 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1199
2831a86c
ZA
1200L<Announced on 2010-04-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158346.html>
1201
4363636d
DG
1202At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them,
1203called out, 'Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL soon make you
1204dry enough!' They all sat down at once, in a large ring, with the Mouse
1205in the middle. Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt
1206sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon.
1207
1208'Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, 'are you all ready? This
1209is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! "William
1210the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was soon submitted
1211to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of late much
1212accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of
d517a16a 1213Mercia and Northumbria --"'
4363636d 1214
2831a86c 1215=head2 v5.12.0-RC2 - no announcement
4363636d 1216
2831a86c 1217Available on CPAN since 2010-04-01.
4363636d 1218
3e340399 1219=head2 v5.12.0-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
4363636d 1220
2831a86c
ZA
1221L<Announced on 2010-03-29 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg158060.html>
1222
4363636d
DG
1223So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the
1224hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of
1225making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and
1226picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran
1227close by her.
1228
1229There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice think it so
1230VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, 'Oh dear! Oh
1231dear! I shall be late!' (when she thought it over afterwards, it
1232occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this, but at the time
1233it all seemed quite natural); but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH
1234OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on,
1235Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had
1236never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to
1237take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the field
1238after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large
1239rabbit-hole under the hedge.
1240
1241In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how
1242in the world she was to get out again.
1243
0e6b8110 1244=head2 v5.12.0-RC0 - no epigraph
4363636d 1245
2831a86c 1246L<Announced on 2020-03-21 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg157761.html>
4363636d 1247
3e340399 1248=head2 v5.11.5 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "Christabel"
4363636d 1249
2831a86c
ZA
1250L<Announced on 2010-02-21 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/02/msg156957.html>
1251
4363636d
DG
1252 A little child, a limber elf,
1253 Singing, dancing to itself,
1254 A fairy thing with red round cheeks,
1255 That always finds, and never seeks,
1256 Makes such a vision to the sight
1257 As fills a father's eyes with light;
1258 And pleasures flow in so thick and fast
1259 Upon his heart, that he at last
1260 Must needs express his love's excess
1261 With words of unmeant bitterness.
1262 Perhaps 'tis pretty to force together
1263 Thoughts so all unlike each other;
1264 To mutter and mock a broken charm,
1265 To dally with wrong that does no harm.
1266 Perhaps 'tis tender too and pretty
1267 At each wild word to feel within
1268 A sweet recoil of love and pity.
1269 And what, if in a world of sin
1270 (O sorrow and shame should this be true!)
1271 Such giddiness of heart and brain
1272 Comes seldom save from rage and pain,
1273 So talks as it's most used to do.
1274
4363636d
DG
1275=head2 v5.11.4 - Fyodor Dostoevsky, "Crime and Punishment"
1276
2831a86c
ZA
1277L<Announced on 2010-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/01/msg155848.html>
1278
4363636d
DG
1279And you don't suppose that I went into it headlong like a fool? I went
1280into it like a wise man, and that was just my destruction. And you
1281mustn't suppose that I didn't know, for instance, that if I began to
1282question myself whether I had the right to gain power -- I certainly
1283hadn't the right -- or that if I asked myself whether a human being is a
1284louse it proved that it wasn't so for me, though it might be for a man
1285who would go straight to his goal without asking questions.... If I
1286worried myself all those days, wondering whether Napoleon would have
1287done it or not, I felt clearly of course that I wasn't Napoleon.
1288
4363636d
DG
1289=head2 v5.11.3 - Mark Twain, "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer"
1290
2831a86c
ZA
1291L<Announced on 2009-12-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/12/msg154838.html>
1292
4363636d 1293"Say -- I'm going in a swimming, I am. Don't you wish you could? But of
d517a16a 1294course you'd druther work -- wouldn't you? Course you would!"
4363636d
DG
1295
1296Tom contemplated the boy a bit, and said: "What do you call work?"
1297
1298"Why ain't that work?"
1299
1300Tom resumed his whitewashing, and answered carelessly: "Well, maybe it
1301is, and maybe it aint. All I know, is, it suits Tom Sawyer."
1302
1303"Oh come, now, you don't mean to let on that you like it?"
1304
1305The brush continued to move. "Like it? Well I don't see why I oughtn't
1306to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?"
1307
1308That put the thing in a new light. Ben stopped nibbling his apple. Tom
1309swept his brush daintily back and forth -- stepped back to note the effect
1310-- added a touch here and there-criticised the effect again -- Ben
1311watching every move and getting more and more interested, more and more
1312absorbed. Presently he said: "Say, Tom, let me whitewash a little."
1313
4363636d
DG
1314=head2 v5.11.2 - Michael Marshall Smith, "Only Forward"
1315
f0ccce9b 1316L<Announced on 2009-11-20 by Léon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/11/msg153646.html>
2831a86c 1317
4363636d
DG
1318The streets were pretty quiet, which was nice. They're always quiet here
1319at that time: you have to be wearing a black jacket to be out on the
1320streets between seven and nine in the evening, and not many people in
1321the area have black jackets. It's just one of those things. I currently
1322live in Colour Neighbourhood, which is for people who are heavily into
1323colour. All the streets and buildings are set for instant colourmatch:
1324as you walk down the road they change hue to offset whatever you're
1325wearing. When the streets are busy it's kind of intense, and anyone
1326prone to epileptic seizures isn't allowed to live in the Neighbourhood,
1327however much they're into colour.
1328
4363636d
DG
1329=head2 v5.11.1 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
1330
2831a86c
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1331L<Announced on 2009-10-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg152360.html>
1332
4363636d
DG
1333Milo had been caught red-handed in the act of plundering his countrymen,
1334and, as a result, his stock had never been higher. He proved good as his
1335word when a rawboned major from Minnesota curled his lip in rebellious
1336disavowal and demanded his share of the syndicate Milo kept saying
1337everybody owned. Milo met the challenge by writing the words "A Share"
1338on the nearest scrap of paper and handing it away with a virtuous disdain
1339that won the envy and admiration of almost everyone who knew him. His
1340glory was at a peak, and Colonel Cathcart, who knew and admired his
1341war record, was astonished by the deferential humility with which Mil
1342presented himself at Group Headquarters and made his fantastic appeal
1343for more hazardous assignment.
1344
4363636d
DG
1345=head2 v5.11.0 - Mikhail Bulgakov, "The Master and Margarita"
1346
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1347L<Announced on 2009-10-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg151376.html>
1348
4363636d
DG
1349Whispers of an "evil power" were heard in lines at dairy shops, in
1350streetcars, stores, arguments, kitchens, suburban and long-distance
1351trains, at stations large and small, in dachas and on beaches. Needless
1352to say, truly mature and cultured people did not tell these stories
1353about an evil power's visit to the capital. In fact, they even made fun
1354of them and tried to talk sense into those who told them. Nevertheless,
1355facts are facts, as they say, and cannot simply be dismissed without
1356explanation: somebody had visited the capital. The charred cinders of
1357Griboyedov alone, and many other things besides, confirmed it. Cultured
1358people shared the point of view of the investigating team: it was the
1359work of a gang of hypnotists and ventriloquists magnificently skilled in
1360their art.
1361
4363636d
DG
1362=head2 v5.10.1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1363
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1364L<Announced on 2009-09-23 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150172.html>
1365
4363636d
DG
1366'Briefly, sir, I am the Permanent Under-Secretary of State, known as
1367the Permanent Secretary. Woolley here is your Principal Private
1368Secretary. I, too, have a Principal Private Secretary, and he is the
1369Principal Private Secretary to the Permanent Secretary. Directly
1370responsible to me are ten Deputy Secretaries, eighty-seven Under
1371Secretaries and two hundred and nineteen Assistant Secretaries.
1372Directly responsible to the Principal Private Secretaries are plain
1373Private Secretaries. The Prime Minister will be appointing two
1374Parliamentary Under-Secretaries and you will be appointing your own
1375Parliamentary Private Secretary.'
1376
1377'Can they all type?' I joked.
1378
1379'None of us can type, Minister,' replied Sir Humphrey smoothly. 'Mrs
1380McKay types - she is your Secretary.'
1381
1382I couldn't tell whether or not he was joking. 'What a pity,' I said.
1383'We could have opened an agency.'
1384
1385Sir Humphrey and Bernard laughed. 'Very droll, sir,' said Sir
1386Humphrey. 'Most amusing, sir,' said Bernard. Were they genuinely
1387amused at my wit, or just being rather patronising? 'I suppose they
1388all say that, do they?' I ventured.
1389
1390Sir Humphrey reassured me on that. 'Certainly not, Minister,' he
1391replied. 'Not quite all.'
1392
0e6b8110 1393=head2 v5.10.1-RC2 - no epigraph
4363636d 1394
2831a86c 1395L<Announced on 2009-08-18 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150015.html>
3e340399 1396
0e6b8110 1397=head2 v5.10.1-RC1 - no epigraph
4363636d 1398
2831a86c 1399L<Announced on 2009-08-06 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg149498.html>
3e340399 1400
c7bed260 1401=head2 v5.10.0 - Laurence Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
4363636d 1402
c7bed260
Z
1403L<Announced on 2007-12-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/12/msg131636.html>
1404
1405He would often declare, in speaking his thoughts upon the subject, that
1406he did not conceive how the greatest family in England could stand it
1407out against an uninterrupted succession of six or seven short
1408noses.--And for the contrary reason, he would generally add, That it
1409must be one of the greatest problems in civil life, where the same
1410number of long and jolly noses, following one another in a direct line,
1411did not raise and hoist it up into the best vacancies in the kingdom.
1412
1413=head2 v5.10.0-RC2 - no epigraph
1414
1415L<Announced on 2007-11-25 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130978.html>
1416
1417=head2 v5.10.0-RC1 - no epigraph
1418
1419L<Announced on 2007-11-17 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130653.html>
1420
1421=head2 v5.9.5 - no announcement
1422
1423L<Pre-announced on 2007-07-07 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/07/msg126358.html>,
1424available on CPAN with same date, but never actually announced.
1425
1426=head2 v5.9.4 - no epigraph
1427
1428L<Announced on 2006-08-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/08/msg115782.html>
1429
1430=head2 v5.9.3 - no epigraph
1431
1432L<Announced on 2006-01-28 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg109086.html>
1433
1434=head2 v5.9.2 - Thomas Pynchon, "V"
1435
1436L<Announced on 2005-04-01 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20050401150702.2b4a70d5@grubert.mandrakesoft.com>
1437
1438This word flip was weird. Every recording date of McClintic's he'd
1439gotten into the habit of talking electricity with the audio men and
1440technicians of the studio. McClintic once couldn't have cared less
1441about electricity, but now it seemed if that was helping him reach a
1442bigger audience, some digging, some who would never dig, but all
1443paying and those royalties keeping the Triumph in gas and McClintic
1444in J. Press suits, then McClintic ought to be grateful to
1445electricity, ought maybe to learn a little more about it. So he'd
1446picked up some here and there, and one day last summer he got around
1447to talking stochastic music and digital computers with one
1448technician. Out of the conversation had come Set/Reset, which was
1449getting to be a signature for the group. He had found out from this
1450sound man about a two-triode circuit called a flip-flop, which when
1451it turned on could be one of two ways, depending on which tube was
1452conducting and which was cut off: set or reset, flip or flop.
1453
1454"And that," the man said, "can be yes or no, or one or zero. And
1455that is what you might call one of the basic units, or specialized
1456`cells' in a big `electronic brain.' "
1457
1458"Crazy," said McClintic, having lost him back there someplace. But
1459one thing that did occur to him was if a computer's brain could go
1460flip or flop, why so could a musician's. As long as you were flop,
1461everything was cool. But where did the trigger-pulse come from to
1462make you flip?
1463
1464=head2 v5.9.1 - Tom Stoppard, "Arcadia"
1465
1466L<Announced on 2004-03-16 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/8587d77c565f2d43>
1467
1468Aren't you supposed to have a pony?
1469
1470=head2 v5.9.0 - Doris Lessing, "Martha Quest"
1471
1472L<Announced on 2003-10-27 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/63a8c34385de82a1>
1473
1474What of October, that ambiguous month
4363636d 1475
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1476=head2 v5.8.9 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1477
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1478L<Announced on 2008-12-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/12/msg142571.html>
1479
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1480Frank and I, unlike the civil servants, were still puzzled that such a
1481proposal as the Europass could even be seriously under consideration by
1482the FCO. We can both see clearly that it is wonderful ammunition for the
1483anti-Europeans. I asked Humphrey if the Foreign Office doesn't realise
1484how damaging this would be to the European ideal?
1485
1486'I'm sure they do, Minister, he said. That's why they support it.'
1487
1488This was even more puzzling, since I'd always been under the impression
1489that the FO is pro-Europe. 'Is it or isn't it?' I asked Humphrey.
1490
1491'Yes and no,' he replied of course, 'if you'll pardon the
1492expression. The Foreign Office is pro-Europe because it is really
1493anti-Europe. In fact the Civil Service was united in its desire to make
1494sure the Common Market didn't work. That's why we went into it.'
1495
1496This sounded like a riddle to me. I asked him to explain further. And
1497basically his argument was as follows: Britain has had the same foreign
1498policy objective for at least the last five hundred years - to create a
1499disunited Europe. In that cause we have fought with the Dutch against
1500the Spanish, with the Germans against the French, with the French and
1501Italians against the Germans, and with the French against the Italians
1502and Germans. [The Dutch rebellion against Phillip II of Spain, the
1503Napoleonic Wars, the First World War, and the Second World War - Ed.]
1504
1505In other words, divide and rule. And the Foreign Office can see no
1506reason to change when it has worked so well until now.
1507
1508I was aware of this, naturally, but I regarded it as ancient history.
1509Humphrey thinks that it is, in fact, current policy. It was necessary
1510for us to break up the EEC, he explained, so we had to get inside. We
1511had previously tried to break it up from the outside, but that didn't
1512work. [A reference to our futile and short-lived involvement in EFTA,
1513the European Free Trade Association, founded in 1960 and which the UK
1514left in 1972 - Ed.] Now that we're in, we are able to make a complete
1515pig's breakfast out of it. We've now set the Germans against the French,
1516the French against the Italians, the Italians against the Dutch... and
1517the Foreign office is terribly happy. It's just like old time.
1518
1519I was staggered by all of this. I thought that the all of us who are
1520publicly pro-European believed in the European ideal. I said this to Sir
1521Humphrey, and he simply chuckled.
1522
1523So I asked him: if we don't believe in the European Ideal, why are we
1524pushing to increase the membership?
1525
1526'Same reason,' came the reply. 'It's just like the United Nations. The
1527more members it has, the more arguments you can stir up, and the more
1528futile and impotent it becomes.'
1529
1530This all strikes me as the most appalling cynicism, and I said so.
1531
1532Sir Humphrey agreed completely. 'Yes Minister. We call it
1533diplomacy. It's what made Britain great, you know.'
1534
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1535=head2 v5.8.9-RC2 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1536
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1538
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1539There was silence in the office. I didn't know what we were going to do
1540about the four hundred new people supervising our economy drive or the
1541four hundred new people for the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office, or
1542anything! I simply sat and waited and hoped that my head would stop
1543thumping and that some idea would be suggested by someone sometime soon.
1544
1545Sir Humphrey obliged. 'Minister... if we were to end the economy drive
1546and close the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office we could issue an immediate
1547press announcement that you had axed eight hundred jobs.' He had
1548obviously thought this out carefully in advance, for at this moment he
1549produced a slim folder from under his arm. 'If you'd like to approve
1550this draft...'
1551
1552I couldn't believe the impertinence of the suggestion. Axed eight
1553hundred jobs? 'But no one was ever doing these jobs,' I pointed out
1554incredulously. 'No one's been appointed yet.'
1555
1556'Even greater economy,' he replied instantly. 'We've saved eight hundred
1557redundancy payments as well.'
1558
1559'But...' I attempted to explain '... that's just phony. It's dishonest,
1560it's juggling with figures, it's pulling the wool over people's eyes.'
1561
1562'A government press release, in fact.' said Humphrey.
1563
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1564=head2 v5.8.9-RC1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1565
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1566L<Announced on 2008-11-10 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg141515.html>
1567
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1568A jumbo jet touched down, with BURANDAN AIRWAYS written on the side. I
1569was hugely impressed. British Airways are having to pawn their Concordes,
1570and here is this little tiny African state with its own airline, jumbo
1571jets and all.
1572
1573I asked Bernard how many planes Burandan Airways had. 'None,' he said.
1574
1575I told him not to be silly and use his eyes. 'No Minister, it belongs to
1576Freddie Laker,' he said. 'They chartered it last week and repainted it
1577specially.' Apparently most of the Have-Nots (I mean, LDCs) do this - at
1578the opening of the UN General Assembly the runways of Kennedy Airport are
1579jam-packed with phoney flag-carriers. 'In fact,' said Bernard with a sly
1580grin, 'there was one 747 that belonged to nine different African airlines
1581in a month. They called it the mumbo-jumbo.'
1582
1583While we watched nothing much happening on the TV except the mumbo-jumbo
1584taxiing around Prestwick and the Queen looking a bit chilly, Bernard gave
1585me the next day's schedule and explained that I was booked on the night
1586sleeper from King's Cross to Edinburgh because I had to vote in a
1587three-line whip at the House tonight and would have to miss the last
1588plane. Then the commentator, in that special hushed BBC voice used for any
1589occasion with which Royalty is connected, announced reverentially that we
1590were about to catch our first glimpse of President Selim.
1591
1592And out of the plane stepped Charlie. My old friend Charlie Umtali. We
1593were at LSE together. Not Selim Mohammed at all, but Charlie.
1594
1595Bernard asked me if I were sure. Silly question. How could you forget a
1596name like Charlie Umtali?
1597
1598I sent Bernard for Sir Humphrey, who was delighted to hear that we now
1599know something about our official visitor.
1600
1601Bernard's official brief said nothing. Amazing! Amazing how little the FCO
1602has been able to find out. Perhaps they were hoping it would all be on the
1603car radio. All the brief says is that Colonel Selim Mohammed had converted
1604to Islam some years ago, they didn't know his original name, and therefore
1605knew little of his background.
1606
1607I was able to tell Humphrey and Bernard /all/ about his background.
1608Charlie was a red-hot political economist, I informed them. Got the top
1609first. Wiped the floor with everyone.
1610
1611Bernard seemed relieved. 'Well that's all right then.'
1612
1613'Why?' I enquired.
1614
1615'I think Bernard means,' said Sir Humphrey helpfully, 'that he'll know how
1616to behave if he was at an English University. Even if it was the LSE.' I
1617never know whether or not Humphrey is insulting me intentionally.
1618
1619Humphrey was concerned about Charlie's political colour. 'When you said
1620that he was red-hot, were you speaking politically?'
1621
1622In a way I was. 'The thing about Charlie is that you never quite know
1623where you are with him. He's the sort of chap who follows you into a
1624revolving door and comes out in front.'
1625
1626'No deeply held convictions?' asked Sir Humphrey.
1627
1628'No. The only thing Charlie was committed too was Charlie.'
1629
1630'Ah, I see. A politician, Minister.'
1631
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1632=head2 v5.8.8 - Joe Raposo, "Bein' Green"
1633
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1634L<Announced on 2006-02-01 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/28caf52e41ebe723>
1635
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1636 It's not that easy bein' green
1637 Having to spend each day the color of the leaves
4363636d 1638 When I think it could be nicer being red or yellow or gold
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DG
1639 Or something much more colorful like that
1640
1641 It's not easy bein' green
4363636d 1642 It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things
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DG
1643 And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're
1644 Not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water
1645 Or stars in the sky
1646
1647 But green's the color of Spring
1648 And green can be cool and friendly-like
1649 And green can be big like an ocean
1650 Or important like a mountain
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DG
1651 Or tall like a tree
1652
1653 When green is all there is to be
1654 It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why?
1655 Wonder I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful
1656 And I think it's what I want to be
1657
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1658=head2 v5.8.8-RC1 - Cosgrove Hall Productions, "Dangermouse"
1659
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1660L<Announced on 2006-01-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/d231fc554af8cc51>
1661
1662Greenback: And the world is mine, all mine. Muhahahahaha. See to it!
51caa79e 1663
2831a86c 1664Stiletto: Si, Barone. Subito, Barone.
4363636d 1665
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1666=head2 v5.8.7 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
1667
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1668L<Announced on 2005-05-31 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9a545704a0062f16>
1669
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1670And now, imagine the triumphant procession: Peter at the head; after him the
1671hunters leading the wolf; and winding up the procession, grandfather and the
1672cat.
1673
1674Grandfather shook his head discontentedly: "Well, and if Peter hadn't caught
51caa79e 1675the wolf? What then?"
4363636d 1676
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1677=head2 v5.8.7-RC1 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
1678
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1679L<Announced on 2005-05-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/05/msg100711.html>
1680
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1681And now this is how things stood: The cat was sitting on one branch. The
1682bird on another, not too close to the cat. And the wolf walked round and
1683round the tree, looking at them with greedy eyes.
1684
1685In the meantime, Peter, without the slightest fear, stood behind the
1686gate, watching all that was going on. He ran home,got a strong rope and
1687climbed up the high stone wall.
1688
1689One of the branches of the tree, around which the wolf was walking,
1690stretched out over the wall.
1691
1692Grabbing hold of the branch, Peter lightly climbed over on to the tree.
1693Peter said to the bird: "Fly down and circle round the wolf's head, only
1694take care that he doesn't catch you!".
1695
1696The bird almost touched the wolf's head with its wings, while the wolf
1697snapped angrily at him from this side and that.
1698
1699How that bird teased the wolf, how that wolf wanted to catch him! But
51caa79e 1700the bird was clever and the wolf simply couldn't do anything about it.
4363636d 1701
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1702=head2 v5.8.6 - A. A. Milne, "The House at Pooh Corner"
1703
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1704L<Announced on 2004-11-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20041128000836.GA304@Bagpuss.unfortu.net>
1705
4363636d 1706"Hallo, Pooh," said Piglet, giving a jump of surprise. "I knew it was
51caa79e 1707you."
4363636d 1708
51caa79e 1709"So did I,", said Pooh. "What are you doing?"
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DG
1710
1711"I'm planting a haycorn, Pooh, so that it can grow up into an oak-tree,
1712and have lots of haycorns just outside the front door instead of having
51caa79e 1713to walk miles and miles, do you see, Pooh?"
4363636d 1714
51caa79e 1715"Supposing it doesn't?" said Pooh.
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DG
1716
1717"It will, because Christopher Robin says it will, so that's why I'm
1718planting it."
1719
1720"Well," aid Pooh, "if I plant a honeycomb outside my house, then it will
51caa79e 1721grow up into a beehive."
4363636d 1722
51caa79e 1723Piglet wasn't quite sure about this.
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DG
1724
1725"Or a /piece/ of a honeycomb," said Pooh, "so as not to waste too much.
1726Only then I might only get a piece of a beehive, and it might be the
51caa79e 1727wrong piece, where the bees were buzzing and not hunnying. Bother"
4363636d 1728
51caa79e 1729Piglet agreed that that would be rather bothering.
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DG
1730
1731"Besides, Pooh, it's a very difficult thing, planting unless you know
1732how to do it," he said; and he put the acorn in the hole he had made,
51caa79e 1733and covered it up with earth, and jumped on it.
4363636d 1734
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1735=head2 v5.8.6-RC1 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie the Pooh"
1736
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1737L<Announced on 2004-11-11 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/11/msg95786.html>
1738
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1739"Hallo!" said Piglet, "whare are /you/ doing?"
1740
1741"Hunting," said Pooh.
1742
1743"Hunting what?"
1744
1745"Tracking something," said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously.
1746
1747"Tracking what?" said Piglet, coming closer.
1748
1749"That's just what I ask myself, I ask myself, What?"
1750
1751"What do you think you'll answer?"
1752
1753"I shall have to wait until I catch up with it," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
1754"Now, look there." He pointed to the ground in front of him. "What do
1755you see there?"
1756
1757"Track," said Piglet. "Paw-marks." He gave a little squeak of
1758excitement. "Oh, Pooh!" Do you think it's a--a--a Woozle?"
1759
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1760=head2 v5.8.5 - wikipedia, "Yew"
1761
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1762L<Announced on 2004-07-19 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/68340e2e4c39222c>
1763
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1764Yews are relatively slow growing trees, widely used in landscaping and
1765ornamental horticulture. They have flat, dark-green needles, reddish
1766bark, and bear seeds with red arils, which are eaten by thrushes,
1767waxwings and other birds, dispersing the hard seeds undamaged in their
1768droppings. Yew wood is reddish brown (with white sapwood), and very
1769hard. It was traditionally used to make bows, especially the English
1770longbow.
1771
1772In England, the Common Yew (Taxus baccata, also known as English Yew) is
1773often found in churchyards. It is sometimes suggested that these are
1774placed there as a symbol of long life or trees of death, and some are
1775likely to be over 3,000 years old. It is also suggested that yew trees
1776may have a pre-Christian association with old pagan holy sites, and the
1777Christian church found it expedient to use and take over existing sites.
1778Another explanation is that the poisonous berries and foliage discourage
1779farmers and drovers from letting their animals wander into the burial
1780grounds. The yew tree is a frequent symbol in the Christian poetry of
51caa79e 1781T.S. Eliot, especially his Four Quartets.
4363636d 1782
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1783=head2 v5.8.5-RC2 - wikipedia, "Beech"
1784
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1785L<Announced on 2004-07-09 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/f92175725af7a5ad>
1786
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1787Beeches are trees of the Genus Fagus, family Fagaceae, including about
1788ten species in Europe, Asia, and North America. The leaves are entire or
1789sparsely toothed. The fruit is a small, sharply-angled nut, borne in
1790pairs in spiny husks. The beech most commonly grown as an ornamental or
1791shade tree is the European beech (Fagus sylvatica).
1792
1793The southern beeches belong to a different but related genus,
1794Nothofagus. They are found in Australia, New Zealand, New Guinea, New
51caa79e 1795Caledonia and South America.
4363636d 1796
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1797=head2 v5.8.5-RC1 - wikipedia, "Pedunculate Oak" (abridged)
1798
38183302 1799L<Announced on 2004-07-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/ca6ce4a7ed9f219c?pli=1>
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1801The Pedunculate Oak is called the Common Oak in Britain, and is also
1802often called the English Oak in other English speaking countries It is a
1803large deciduous tree to 25-35m tall (exceptionally to 40m), with lobed
1804and sessile (stalk-less) leaves. Flowering takes place in early to mid
1805spring, and their fruit, called "acorns", ripen by autumn of the same
1806year. The acorns are pedunculate (having a peduncle or acorn-stalk) and
1807may occur singly, or several acorns may occur on a stalk.
1808
1809It forms a long-lived tree, with a large widespreading head of rugged
1810branches. While it may naturally live to an age of a few centuries, many
1811of the oldest trees are pollarded or coppiced, both pruning techniques
1812that extend the tree's potential lifespan, if not its health.
1813
1814Within its native range it is valued for its importance to insects and
1815other wildlife. Numerous insects live on the leaves, buds, and in the
1816acorns. The acorns form a valuable food resource for several small
1817mammals and some birds, notably Jays Garrulus glandarius.
1818
1819It is planted for forestry, and produces a long-lasting and durable
51caa79e 1820heartwood, much in demand for interior and furniture work.
4363636d 1821
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1822=head2 v5.8.4 - T. S. Eliot, "The Old Gumbie Cat"
1823
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1824L<Announced on 2004-04-22 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/c7333acf03ef4015>
1825
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1826 I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots;
1827 The curtain-cord she likes to wind, and tie it into sailor-knots.
1828 She sits upon the window-sill, or anything that's smooth and flat:
1829 She sits and sits and sits and sits -- and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat!
1830
1831 But when the day's hustle and bustle is done,
1832 Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun.
1833 She thinks that the cockroaches just need employment
1834 To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment.
1835 So she's formed, from that a lot of disorderly louts,
1836 A troop of well-disciplined helpful boy-scouts,
1837 With a purpose in life and a good deed to do--
1838 And she's even created a Beetles' Tattoo.
1839
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1840 So for Old Gumbie Cats let us now give three cheers --
1841 On whom well-ordered households depend, it appears.
1842
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1843
1844=head2 v5.8.4-RC2 - T. S. Eliot, "Macavity: The Mystery Cat"
1845
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1846L<Announced on 2004-04-16 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/84f6fdd73cc56a1b>
1847
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1848 Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw --
1849 For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
1850 He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
1851 For when they reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
1852
1853 Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
1854 He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
1855 His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
1856 And when you reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
1857 You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air --
1858 But I tell you once and once again, /Macavity's not there/!
1859
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1860=head2 v5.8.4-RC1 - T. S. Eliot, "Skimbleshanks: The Railway Cat"
1861
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1862L<Announced on 2004-04-05 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e500353440769ebf>
1863
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1864 There's a whisper down the line at 11.39
1865 When the Night Mail's ready to depart,
1866 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble has he gone to hunt the thimble?
1867 We must find him of the train can't start.'
1868 All the guards and all the porters and the stationmaster's daughters
1869 They are searching high and low,
1870 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble for unless he's very nimble
1871 Then the Night Mail just can't go'
1872 At 11.42 then the signal's overdue
1873 And the passengers are frantic to a man--
1874 Then Skimble will appear and he'll saunter to the rear:
1875 He's been busy in the luggage van!
1876 He gives one flash of his glass-green eyes
c5fb089a 1877 And the signal goes 'All Clear!'
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1878 And we're off at last of the northern part
1879 Of the Northern Hemisphere!
1880
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1881=head2 v5.8.3 - Arthur William Edgar O'Shaugnessy, "Ode"
1882
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1883L<Announced on 2004-01-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/968fb8d71e23af69>
1884
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1885 We are the music makers,
1886 And we are the dreamers of dreams,
1887 Wandering by lonely sea-breakers,
1888 And sitting by desolate streams; --
1889 World-losers and world-forsakers,
1890 On whom the pale moon gleams:
1891 Yet we are the movers and shakers
1892 Of the world for ever, it seems.
4363636d 1893
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1894=head2 v5.8.3-RC1 - Irving Berlin, "Let's Face the Music and Dance"
1895
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1896L<Announced on 2004-01-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/5ced50bebcd11c96>
1897
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1898 There may be trouble ahead,
1899 But while there's music and moonlight,
1900 And love and romance,
1901 Let's face the music and dance.
1902
1903 Before the fiddlers have fled,
1904 Before they ask us to pay the bill,
1905 And while we still have that chance,
1906 Let's face the music and dance.
1907
1908 Soon, we'll be without the moon,
1909 Humming a different tune, and then,
1910
1911 There may be teardrops to shed,
1912 So while there's music and moonlight,
1913 And love and romance,
1914 Let's face the music and dance.
1915
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1916=head2 v5.8.2 - Walt Whitman, "Passage to India"
1917
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1918L<Announced on 2003-11-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/4714574f93967673>
1919
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1920 Passage, immediate passage! the blood burns in my veins!
1921 Away O soul! hoist instantly the anchor!
1922 Cut the hawsers - hall out - shake out every sail!
1923 Have we not stood here like trees in the ground long enough?
1924 Have we not grovel'd here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes?
1925 Have we not darken'd and dazed ourselves with books long enough?
1926
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1927 Sail forth - steer for the deep waters only,
1928 Reckless O soul, exploring, I with the and thou with me,
1929 For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go,
1930 And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all.
1931
1932 O my brave soul!
1933 O farther farther sail!
1934 O daring job, but safe! are they not all the seas of God?
1935 O farther, farther, farther sail!
1936
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1937=head2 v5.8.2-RC2 - Eric Idle/John Du Prez, "Accountancy Shanty"
1938
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1939L<Announced on 2003-11-03 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/7669de5804b792f6>
1940
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1941 It's fun to charter an accountant
1942 And sail the wide accountan-cy,
1943 To find, explore the funds offshore
1944 And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy.
1945
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1946=head2 v5.8.2-RC1 - Edward Lear, "The Jumblies"
1947
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1948L<Announced on 2003-10-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83680ef3bbf7378d>
1949
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1950 They went to sea in a Sieve, they did,
1951 In a Sieve they went to sea:
1952 In spite of all their friends could say,
1953 On a winter's morn, on a stormy day,
1954 In a Sieve they went to sea!
1955 And when the Sieve turned round and round,
1956 And everyone cried, "You'll all be drowned!"
1957 They cried aloud, "Our Sieve ain't big,
1958 But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig!
1959 In a Sieve we'll go to sea!"
1960
1961 Far and few, far and few,
1962 Are the lands where the Jumblies live;
1963 Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
1964 And they went to sea in a Sieve.
1965
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1966=head2 v5.8.1 - epigraph same as v5.7.1
1967
1968L<Announced on 2003-09-25 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82678.html>
1969
1970=head2 v5.8.1-RC5 - Terry Pratchett, "Lords and Ladies"
1971
1972L<Announced on 2003-09-22 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82476.html>
1973
1974No matter what she did with her hair it took about
1975three minutes for it to tangle itself up again,
1976like a garden hosepipe in a shed [Footnote: Which,
1977no matter how carefully coiled, will always uncoil
1978overnight and tie the lawnmower to the bicycles].
1979
1980=head2 v5.8.1-RC4 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1981
1982L<Announced on 2003-08-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/08/msg79184.html>
1983
1984Grand Viziers were /always/ scheming megalomaniacs.
1985It was probably in the job description: "Are you a
1986devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good,
1987then you can be my most trusted minister."
1988
1989=head2 v5.8.1-RC3 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1990
1991L<Announced on 2003-07-30 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg79048.html>
1992
1993Lord Hong had a mind like a knife, although possibly
1994a knife with a curved blade.
1995
1996=head2 v5.8.1-RC2 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1997
1998L<Announced on 2003-07-11 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78102.html>
1999
2000Many an ancient lord's last words had been, "You can't kill
2001me because I've got magic aaargh."
2002
2003=head2 v5.8.1-RC1 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
2004
2005L<Announced on 2003-07-10 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78009.html>
2006
2007Cohen was familiar with city gates. He'd broken down a number
2008in his time, by battering ram, siege gun, and on one occasion
2009with his head.
2010
2011But the gates of Hunghung were pretty damn good gates. They
2012weren't like the gates of Ankh-Morpork, which were usually wide
2013open to attract the spending customer and whose concession to
2014defense was the sign "Thank You For Not Attacking Our City.
2015Bonum Diem." These things were big and made of metal and there
2016was a guardhouse and a squad of unhelpful men in black armor.
2017
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2018=head2 v5.8.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
2019
2020L<Announced on 2002-07-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63720.html>
2021
2022There was the faint sound of footsteps.
2023"Chap with a whip got as far as the big sharp spikes last week,"
2024said the low priest.
2025There was a sound like the flushing of a very old dry lavatory.
2026The footsteps stopped. The High Priest smiled to himself.
2027"Right," he said. "See your two pebbles and raise you two pebbles."
2028The low priest threw down his cards. "Double Onion," he said.
2029The High Priest looked down suspiciously.
2030The low priest consulted a scrap of paper. "That's three hundred
2031thousand, nine hundred and sixty-four pebbles you owe me," he said.
2032There was the sound of footsteps. The priests exchanged glances.
2033"Haven't had one for poisoned-dart alley for quite some time,"
2034said the High Priest.
2035"Five says he makes it", said the low priest. "You're on."
2036There was a faint clatter of metal points on stone.
2037"It's a shame to take your pebbles."
2038There were footsteps again.
2039
2040=head2 v5.8.0-RC3 - no epigraph
2041
2042L<Announced on 2002-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63234.html>
2043
2044=head2 v5.8.0-RC2 - no epigraph
2045
2046L<Announced on 2002-06-21 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg62013.html>
2047
2048=head2 v5.8.0-RC1 - no epigraph
2049
2050L<Announced on 2002-06-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg60317.html>
2051
2052=head2 v5.7.3 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
2053
2054L<Announced on 2002-03-04 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/03/msg53652.html>
2055
2056Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong.
2057No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always
2058got there first, and is waiting for it.
2059
2060=head2 v5.7.2 - Terry Pratchett, "Small Gods"
2061
2062L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/07/msg40370.html>
2063
2064His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools --
2065the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans -- and summed up
2066all three of them in his famous phrase, "You can't trust any
2067bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing
2068you can do about it, so let's have a drink."
2069
2070=head2 v5.7.1 - Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic"
2071
2072L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33851.html>
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DG
2074"What happens next?" asked Twoflower.
2075
2076Hrun screwed a finger in his ear and inspected it absently.
2077
2078"Oh,", he said, "I expect in a minute the door will be
2079flung back and I'll be dragged off to some sort of temple
2080arena where I'll fight maybe a couple of giant spiders
2081and an eight-foot slave from the jungles of Klatch and then
2082I'll rescue some kind of a princess from the altar and then
2083I'll kill off a few guards or whatever and then this girl
2084will show me the secret passage out of the place and we'll
2085liberate a couple of horses and escape with the treasure."
2086Hrun leaned his head back on his hands and looked at the
2087ceiling, whistling tunelessly.
2088
2089"All that?" said Twoflower.
2090
2091"Usually."
2092
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2093=head2 v5.7.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Moving Pictures"
2094
2095L<Announced on 2000-09-02 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/09/msg17730.html>
2096
2097The Librarian had seen many weird things in his time,
2098but that had to be the 57th strangest.
2099[footnote: he had a tidy mind]
2100
2101=head2 v5.6.2 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
2102
2103L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/deb8cb9ad918716f>
2104
2105When great or unexpected events fall out upon the stage of this
2106sublunary word--the mind of man, which is an inquisitive kind of
2107a substance, naturally takes a flight, behind the scenes, to see
2108what is the cause and first spring of them--The search was not
2109long in this instance.
2110
2111=head2 v5.6.2-RC1 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
2112
2113L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e3d4acc7a8dd3ce5>
2114
2115"Pray, my dear", quoth my mother, "have you not forgot to wind up the clock?"
2116
2831a86c 2117=head2 v5.6.1 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", Riddles in the Dark
4363636d 2118
2831a86c 2119L<Announced on 2001-04-08 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33823.html>
4363636d 2120
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2121`What have I got in my pocket?' he said aloud. He was talking to
2122himself, but Gollum thought it was a riddle, and he was frightfully
2123upset.
4363636d 2124
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2125`Not fair! not fair!' he hissed. `It isn't fair, my precious, is it,
2126to ask us what it's got in its nassty little pocketses?'
4363636d 2127
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2128Bilbo seeing what had happened and having nothing better to ask
2129stuck to his question, `What have I got in my pocket?' he said
2130louder.
4363636d 2131
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2132`S-s-s-s-s,' hissed Gollum. `It must give us three guesseses,
2133my precious, three guesseses.'
4363636d 2134
2831a86c 2135=head2 v5.6.1-foolish - no epigraph
4363636d 2136
2831a86c 2137L<Announced on 2001-08-04 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33421.html>
3e340399 2138
2831a86c 2139=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL3 - I can't find the announcement
4363636d 2140
a4b0381d
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2141No announcement available.
2142
2831a86c 2143=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL2 - no epigraph
4363636d 2144
2831a86c 2145L<Announced on 2001-01-31 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/01/msg29934.html>
4363636d 2146
2831a86c 2147=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL1 - no epigraph
4363636d 2148
2831a86c 2149L<Announced on 2000-12-18 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/12/msg27738.html>
4363636d 2150
2831a86c 2151=head2 v5.6.0 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", The Last Stage
a4b0381d 2152
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2153L<Announced on 2000-03-23 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10341.html>
2154
2155 The dragon is withered,
2156 His bones are now crumbled;
2157 His armour is shivered,
2158 His splendour is humbled!
2159 Though sword shall be rusted,
2160 And throne and crown perish
2161 With strength that men trusted
2162 And wealth that they cherish,
2163 Here grass is still growing,
2164 And leaves are a yet swinging,
2165 The white water flowing,
2166 And elves are yet singing
2167 Come! Tra-la-la-lally!
2168 Come back to the valley.
2169
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2170=head2 v5.6.0-RC3 - no epigraph
2171
2172L<Announced on 2000-03-22 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10140.html>
4363636d 2173
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2174=head2 v5.005_05-RC1 - no epigraph
2175
2176L<Announced on 2009-02-16 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/02/msg144227.html>
2177
2178=head2 v5.005_04 - no epigraph
2179
2180L<Announced on 2004-03-01 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6c240ad0b189cb47>
2181
2182=head2 v5.005_04-RC2 - Rudyard Kipling, "The Jungle Book"
2183
2184L<Announced on 2004-02-19 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83e5421124a7b49d>
2185
2186The monkeys called the place their city, and pretended to despise
2187the Jungle-People because they lived in the forest. And yet they
2188never knew what the buildings were made for nor how to use
2189them. They would sit in circles on the hall of the king's council
2190chamber, and scratch for fleas and pretend to be men; or they would
2191run in and out of the roofless houses and collect pieces of plaster
2192and old bricks in a corner, and forget where they had hidden them,
2193and fight and cry in scuffling crowds, and then break off to play up
2194and down the terraces of the king's garden, where they would shake
2195the rose trees and the oranges in sport to see the fruit and flowers
2196fall.
2197
2198=head2 v5.005_04-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
2199
2200L<Announced on 2004-02-05 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6aaeb6ec699bd116>
2201
2202Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had
2203plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to wonder what was
2204going to happen next. First, she tried to look down and make out what
2205she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything; then she looked
2206at the sides of the well, and noticed that they were filled with
2207cupboards and book-shelves; here and there she saw maps and pictures
2208hung upon pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves as she
2209passed; it was labelled 'ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great
2210disappointment it was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear
2211of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as
2212she fell past it.
2213
2214=head2 v1.0_16 - Johan Vromans, extemporarily
2215
2216L<Announced on 2003-12-18 by Richard Clamp|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9281dc6194d15940>
2217
4363636d
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2218=head1 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
2219
0e6b8110 2220This document was originally compiled based on a list of epigraphs
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2221on L<Perl Monks|http://perlmonks.org> titled
2222L<Recent Perl Release Announcement|http://perlmonks.org/?node_id=372406>
2223by ysth.
2224
2225=cut
3e340399 2226
4363636d 2227# vim:tw=72: