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[perl5.git] / Porting / epigraphs.pod
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3=head1 NAME
4
0e6b8110 5perlepigraphs - list of Perl release epigraphs
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6
7=head1 DESCRIPTION
8
0e6b8110 9Many Perl release announcements included an I<epigraph>, a short excerpt
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10from a literary or other creative work, chosen by the pumpking or release
11manager. This file assembles the known list of epigraph for posterity,
12and also links to the release announcements in mailing list archives.
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14I<Note>: these have also been referred to as <epigrams>, but the
15definition of I<epigraph> is closer to the way they have been used.
16Consult your favorite dictionary for details.
17
18=head1 EPIGRAPHS
4363636d 19
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20=head2 v5.20.1-RC2 - Lorenzo da Ponte, Così fan tutte
21
22L<Announced on 2014-09-07 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg219446.html>
23
24 GUGLIELMO:
25 Oh God, I feel that this foot of mine
26 is reluctant to come before her.
27
28 FERRANDO:
29 My trembling lip
30 can utter no word.
31
32 DON ALFONSO:
33 The hero displays his manliness
34 in the most terrible moments.
35
36 FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA:
37 Now that we have heard the news,
38 you have the lesser duty:
39 Take heart, and plunge your swords
40 into both our hearts.
41
42 FERRANDO, GUGLIELMO:
43 My idol, blame fate
44 that I must abandon you.
45
46 DORABELLA: Ah no, you shall not leave...
47 FIORDILIGI: No, cruel one, you shall not go...
48 DORABELLA: First I want to tear out my heart.
49 FIORDILIGI: First I want to die at your feet.
50 FERRANDO (softly to Don Alfonso): What do you say to that?
51 GUGLIELMO (softly to Don Alfonso): You realise?
52 DON ALFONSO (softly): Steady, friend, finem lauda.
53
54 ALL:
55 Thus destiny defrauds
56 the hopes of mortals.
57 Ah, among so many misfortunes,
58 who can ever love life?
59
60 -- Lorenzo da Ponte, /Così fan tutte/,
61 trans. William Weaver
62
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63=head2 v5.20.1-RC1 - Lorenzo da Ponte, Così fan tutte
64
65L<Announced on 2014-08-25 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/08/msg218975.html>
66
67 DON ALFONSO:
68 I'd like to speak, but I haven't the heart:
69 my lip stammers.
70 My voice cannot emerge,
71 but remains in my throat.
72 What will you do? What shall I do?
73 Oh what a great catastrophe!
74 There can be nothing worse.
75 I feel pity for you and for them.
76
77 FIORDILIGI: Heavens! For mercy's sake, Signor Alfonso, don't make us
78 die.
79 DON ALFONSO: My children, you must arm yourselves with constancy.
80 DORABELLA: Ye Gods! What evil has occurred? What horrible event? Is my
81 love dead, perhaps?
82 FIORDILIGI: Is mine dead?
83 DON ALFONSO: They are not dead, but they are not far from it.
84 DORABELLA: Wounded?
85 DON ALFONSO: No.
86 FIORDILIGI: Ill?
87 DON ALFONSO: Nor that.
88 FIORDILIGI: What, then?
89 DON ALFONSO: A royal command summons them to the field of battle.
90 FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA: Alas, what do I hear? And they will leave?
91 DON ALFONSO: Immediately.
92 DORABELLA: And there is no way of preventing it?
93 DON ALFONSO: There is none.
94 FIORDILIGI: And not even a single farewell...
95 DON ALFONSO: The unhappy men haven't the courage to see you; but if
96 you wish it, they are ready...
97 DORABELLA: Where are they?
98 DON ALFONSO: Come in, friends.
99
100 -- Lorenzo da Ponte, /Così fan tutte/,
101 trans. William Weaver
102
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103=head2 v5.21.3 - Robert Service, The Men that Don't Fit In
104
105L<Announced on 2014-08-20 by Peter Martini|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/08/msg218826.html>
106
107 If they just went straight they might go far,
108 They are strong and brave and true;
109 But they're always tired of the things that are,
110 And they want the strange and new.
111 They say: "Could I find my proper groove,
112 What a deep mark I would make!"
113 So they chop and change, and each fresh move
114 Is only a fresh mistake.
115
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116=head2 v5.21.2 - Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin, Charlie Duke, Final minutes of communication of the first manned moon landing, July 20, 1969.
117
118L<Announced on 2014-07-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/07/msg217937.html>
119
120 Armstrong: Okay. Here's a...Looks like a good area here.
121 Aldrin: I got the shadow out there.
122 Aldrin: 250, down at 2 1/2, 19 forward.
123 Aldrin: Altitude, velocity lights.
124 Aldrin: 3 1/2 down, 220 feet, 13 forward.
125 Aldrin: 11 forward. Coming down nicely.
126 Armstrong: Gonna be right over that crater.
127 Aldrin: 200 feet, 4 1/2 down.
128 Aldrin: 5 1/2 down.
129 Armstrong: I got a good spot [garbled].
130 Aldrin: 160 feet, 6 1/2 down.
131 Aldrin: 5 1/2 down, 9 forward. You're looking good.
132 Aldrin: 120 feet.
133 Aldrin: 100 feet, 3 1/2 down, 9 forward. Five percent. Quantity light.
134 Aldrin: Okay. 75 feet. And it's looking good. Down a half, 6 forward.
135 Duke: 60 seconds.
136 Aldrin: Light's on.
137 Aldrin: 60 feet, down 2 1/2. 2 forward. 2 forward. That's good.
138 Aldrin: 40 feet, down 2 1/2. Picking up some dust.
139 Aldrin: 30 feet, 2 1/2 down. [Garbled] shadow.
140 Aldrin: 4 forward. 4 forward. Drifting to the right a little. 20 feet,
141 down a half.
142 Duke: 30 seconds.
143 Aldrin: Drifting forward just a little bit; that's good.
144 Aldrin: Contact Light.
145 Armstrong: Shutdown.
146 Aldrin: Okay. Engine Stop.
147 Aldrin: ACA out of Detent.
148 Armstrong: Out of Detent. Auto.
149 Aldrin: Mode Control, both Auto. Descent Engine Command Override, Off.
150 Engine Arm, Off. 413 is in.
151 Duke: We copy you down, Eagle.
152 Armstrong: Engine arm is off.
153 Armstrong: Houston, Tranquility Base here. The Eagle has landed.
154 Duke: Roger, Twan...[correcting himself] Tranquility. We copy you on
155 the ground. You got a bunch of guys about to turn blue.
156 We're breathing again. Thanks a lot.
157 Aldrin: Thank you.
158
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159=head2 v5.21.1 - Robert Jordan, The Crossroads of Twilights, Book 10 of the Wheel of Time
160
161L<Announced on 2014-06-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/06/msg217030.html>
162
163 We rode on the winds of the rising storm,
164 We ran to the sounds of the thunder.
165 We danced among the lightning bolts,
166 and tore the world asunder.
167
168 -- Anonymous fragment of a poem believed
169 written near the end of the previous Age,
c5aea195 170 known by some as the Third Age.
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171 Sometimes attributed to the Dragon
172 Reborn.
173
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174=head2 v5.21.0 - Friedrich von Schiller, The Song of the Bell
175
176L<Announced on 2014-05-27 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/05/msg215826.html>
177
178 Walled in fast within the earth
179 Stands the form burnt out of clay.
180 This must be the bell’s great birth!
181 Fellows, lend a hand to-day.
182 Sweat must trickle now
183 From the burning brow,
184 Till the work its master honour.
185 Blessing comes from Heaven’s Donor.
186
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187=head2 v5.20.0 - William Shakespeare, Sonnet 18
188
189L<Announced on 2014-05-27 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/05/msg215815.html>
190
191 But thy eternal summer shall not fade,
192 Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st;
193 Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
194 When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st:
195 So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
196 So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.
197
198 -- William Shakespeare, Sonnet 18
199
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200=head2 v5.20.0-RC1 - Lindsey Buckingham, "Second Hand News"
201
202L<Announced on 2014-05-17 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/05/msg215479.html>
203
204 When times go bad
205 when times go rough
206 Won't you lay me down in tall grass
207 And let me do my stuff
208
209 -- Lindsey Buckingham, "Second Hand News"
210
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211=head2 v5.19.11 - Lautréamont, Les Chants de Maldoror
212
213L<Announced on 2014-04-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/04/msg214580.html>
214
215O rigorous mathematics, I have not forgotten you since your wise lessons,
216sweeter than honey, filtered into my heart like a refreshing wave.
217Instinctively, from the cradle, I had longed to drink from your source, older
218than the sun, and I continue to tread the sacred sanctuary of your solemn
219temple, I, the most faithful of your devotees. There was a vagueness in my
220mind, something thick as smoke; but I managed to mount the steps which lead to
221your altar, and you drove away this dark veil, as the wind blows the
222draught-board. You replaced it with excessive coldness, consummate prudence and
223implacable logic. With the aid of your fortifying milk, my intellect developed
224rapidly and took on immense proportions amid the ravishing lucidity which you
225bestow as a gift on all those who sincerely love you. Arithmetic! Algebra!
226Geometry! Awe-inspiring trinity! Luminous triangle! He who has not known you
227is a fool!
228
229 -- Isidore-Lucien Ducasse [as "Comte de Lautréamont"],
230 /Les Chants de Maldoror/, trans. Paul Knight
231
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232=head2 v5.19.10 - John Chadwick, The Decipherment of Linear B
233
234L<Announced on 2014-03-20 by Aaron Crane|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/03/msg213851.html>
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235
236The urge to discover secrets is deeply ingrained in human nature; even
237the least curious mind is roused by the promise of sharing knowledge
238withheld from others. Some are fortunate enough to find a job which
239consists in the solution of mysteries, whether it be the physicist who
240tracks down a hitherto unknown nuclear particle or the policeman who
241detects a criminal. But most of us are driven to sublimate this urge
242by the solving of artificial puzzles devised for our entertainment.
243
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244=head2 v5.19.9 - R. A. MacAvoy, Tea with the Black Dragon
245
246L<Announced on 2014-02-20 by Tony Cook|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/02/msg213047.html>
247
248Old hands. The smell of rain--the smell of Ch'an. Quiet words in
249rough Cantonese. "I am not to be your master. Your master has to be
250stronger than you are--has to tell you you are a fool and make you
251know it. And make you feel content in being a fool. How could I do
252that for you? I'm old. You are too strong for me; you are full of
253chi." The old man has paused then, huddled against the wind while
254clouds thickened above them.
255
256"I will tell you this, Long," he continued, "Before you find yourself
257you will lose your chi. Also you will leave behind you all pride of
258body, pride of mind. You will be reduced. Like me." The old man
259closed his eyes, and rain began to beat against his gray, crew-cut
260hair. He pulled his coat closer. Suddenly his eyes snapped open and
261he looked Long in the face.
262
263"You must leave China. Go across the ocean. There you will meet your
264master." He set down his teacup with a palsied hand. His voice rose,
265grew fierce.
266
267"I tell you this, most honored and impressive visitor. You are a
268fool, yes, but you will find the very thing you seek. You will find
269truth!"
270
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271=head2 v5.19.8 - Joseph Heller, Catch-22
272
273L<Announced on 2014-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/01/msg211729.html>
274
275“I used to get a big kick out of saving people’s lives. Now I wonder what the
276hell’s the point, since they all have to die anyway.”
277
278“Oh, there’s a point, all right,” Dunbar assured him.
279
280“Is there? What is the point?”
281
282“The point is to keep them from dying for as long as you can.”
283
284“Yeah, but what’s the point, since they all have to die anyway?”
285
286“The trick is not to think about that.”
287
288“Never mind the trick. What the hell’s the point?”
289
290Dunbar pondered in silence for a few moments. “Who the hell knows?”
291
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292=head2 v5.19.7 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Slaughterhouse-Five"
293
294L<Announced on 2013-12-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/12/msg210882.html>
295
296=over
297
298 And somewhere in there was springtime. The corpse mines were closed
299 down. The soldiers all left to fight the Russians. In the suburbs,
300 the women and children dug rifle pits. Billy and the rest of his group
301 were locked up in the stable in the suburbs. And then, one morning,
302 they got up to discover that the door was unlocked. World War Two in
303 Europe was over.
304
305 Billy and the rest wandered out onto the shady street. The trees were
306 leafing out. There was nothing going on out there, no traffic of any
307 kind. There was only one vehicle, an abandoned wagon drawn by two
308 horses. The wagon was green and coffin-shaped.
309
310 Birds were talking.
311
312 One bird said to Billy Pilgrim, "Pee-tee-weet?"
313
314=back
315
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316=head2 v5.19.6 - Monty Python's Flying Circus, "Spam"
317
318L<Announced on 2013-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/11/msg210043.html>
319
320=over
321
322 Interior: cheap cafe. All the customers are Vikings. Mr and Mrs Bun enter downwards (on wires).
323
324 Mr. Bun: Morning.
325 Waitress: Morning.
326 Mr. Bun: What have you got, then?
327 Waitress: Well there's egg and bacon; egg, sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg, bacon and spam;
328 egg, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam;
329 spam, spam, spam, egg and spam; spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam;
330 or lobster thermidor aux crevettes, with a mornay sauce garnished with truffle pate, brandy and a fried
331 egg on top and spam
332 Mrs. Bun: Have you got anything without spam in it?
333 Waitress: Well, there's spam, egg, sausage and spam. That's not got MUCH spam in it.
334 Mrs. Bun: I don't want ANY spam.
335 Mr. Bun: Why can't she have egg, bacon, spam and sausage?
336 Mrs. Bun: That's got spam in it!
337 Mr. Bun: Not as much as spam, egg, sausage and spam.
338 Mrs. Bun: Look, could I have egg, bacon, spam and sausage, without the spam.
339 Waitress: Uuuuuuggggh!
340 Mrs. Bun: What d'you mean, uugggh! I don't like spam.
341 Vikings: (singing) Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam ... spam, spam, spam, spam ... lovely spam, wonderful spam ...
342
343 (Brief shot of a Viking ship)
344
345 Waitress: Shut up. Shut up! Shut up! You can't have egg, bacon, spam and sausage without the spam.
346 Mrs. Bun: Why not?
347 Waitress: No, it wouldn't be egg, bacon, spam and sausage, would it?
348 Mrs. Bun: I don't like spam!
349
350=back
351
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352=head2 v5.19.5 - Charles Baudelaire, "The Flowers of Evil", 51. The Cat
353
354L<Announced on 2013-10-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/10/msg208752.html>
355
356=over
357
358 I
359
360 A cat is strolling through my mind
361 Acting as though he owned the place,
362 A lovely cat -- strong, charming, sweet.
363 When he meows, one scarcely hears,
364
365 So tender and discreet his tone;
366 But whether he should growl or purr
367 His voice is always rich and deep.
368 That is the secret of his charm.
369
370 This purling voice that filters down
371 Into my darkest depths of soul
372 Fulfils me like a balanced verse,
373 Delights me as a potion would.
374
375 It puts to sleep the cruellest ills
376 And keeps a rein on ecstasies --
377 Without the need for any words
378 It can pronounce the longest phrase.
379
380 Oh no, there is no bow that draws
381 Across my heart, fine instrument,
382 And makes to sing so royally
383 The strongest and the purest chord,
384
385 More than your voice, mysterious cat,
386 Exotic cat, seraphic cat,
387 In whom all is, angelically,
388 As subtle as harmonious.
389
390 II
391
392 From his soft fur, golden and brown,
393 Goes out so sweet a scent, one night
394 I might have been embalmed in it
395 By giving him one little pet.
396
397 He is my household's guardian soul;
398 He judges, he presides, inspires
399 All matters in hos royal realm;
400 Might he be fairy? or a god?
401
402 When my eyes, to this cat I love
403 Drawn as by a magnet's force,
404 Turn tamely back from that appeal,
405 And when I look within myself,
406
407 I notice with astonishment
408 The fire of his opal eyes,
409 Clear beacons glowing, living jewels,
410 Taking my measure, steadily.
411
412 -- Charles Baudelaire, /The Flowers of Evil, 51. The Cat/,
413 trans. James McGowan
414
415=back
416
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417=head2 v5.19.4 - Washington Irving, "The Widow and Her Son"
418
419L<Announced on 2013-09-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/09/msg207969.html>
420
421=over
422
423There is something in sickness that breaks down the pride of manhood;
424that softens the heart and brings it back to the feelings of infancy.
425Who that has languished, even in advanced life, in sickness and
426despondency — who that has pined on a weary bed in the neglect and
427loneliness of a foreign land — but has thought on the mother "that
428looked on his childhood," that smoothed his pillow and administered to
429his helplessness. — Oh! there is an enduring tenderness in the love
430of a mother to her son that transcends all other affections of the
431heart. It is neither to be chilled by selfishness — nor daunted by
432danger — nor weakened by worthlessness — nor stifled by ingratitude.
433She will sacrifice every comfort to his convenience — she will
434surrender every pleasure to his enjoyment — she will glory in his fame
435and exult in his prosperity. And if misfortune overtake him he will
436be the dearer to her from misfortune — and if disgrace settle upon his
437name, she will still love and cherish him in spite of his disgrace —
438and if all the world beside cast him off, she will be all the world to
439him.
440
441=back
442
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443=head2 v5.19.3 - Andrew Hodges, "Alan Turing: The Enigma"
444
445L<Announced on 2013-08-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/08/msg206318.html>
446
447=over
448
449E.M. Forster, outdoing the King's heresy with grand bravura, had
450written in 1938 that if he were faced with the choice between
451betraying his country and betraying his friends, he hoped he would
452have the courage to betray his country. He would always put the
453personal above the political. But for Alan Turing, unlike Forster, or
454Wittgenstein, or G.H. Hardy, it was more than a theoretical question.
455For him not only had the personal become the political, but the
456political was the personal. He had chosen and promised for himself in
457working for the government. The choice for him therefore was that
458between betraying one part of himself and betraying another part. And
459however much he wavered between these alternatives, there was a solid
460logic to the mind of security, one that could not be expected to take
461an interest in notions of freedom and development. He had no rights
462to such things, as he would have had to admit. He might have
463outwitted the Home Guard, but when it came to questions that mattered,
464there was no doubt that he had placed himself under military law.
465There was a war on; there was always a war on now.
466
467=back
468
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469=head2 v5.19.2 - Fred Brooks, "The Mythical Man-Month"
470
471L<Announced on 2013-07-22 by Aristotle Pagaltzis|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/07/msg204905.html>
472
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473=over
474
475The magic of myth and legend has come true in our time. One types the
476correct incantation on a keyboard, and a display screen comes to life,
477showing things that never were nor could be. [...] Not all is delight,
478however [...] One must perform perfectly. The computer resembles the
479magic of legend in this respect, too. If one character, one pause, of
480the incantation is not strictly in proper form, the magic doesn't work.
481
482=back
0b0ed28b 483
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484=head2 v5.19.1 - William Shakespeare, "A Midsummer Night's Dream"
485
703078b2 486L<Announced on 2013-06-21 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/06/msg203449.html>
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487
488 Over hill, over dale,
489 Thorough bush, thorough briar,
490 Over park, over pale,
491 Thorough flood, thorough fire,
492 I do wander everywhere,
493 Swifter than the moon's sphere;
494 And I serve the fairy queen,
495 To dew her orbs upon the green.
496 The cowslips tall her pensioners be;
497 In their gold coats, spots you see;
498 Those be rubies, fairy favours,
499 In their freckles live our savours.
500 I must go seek some dew-drops here,
501 And hang a perl in every cowslip's ear.
502 Farewell, thou lob of spirits, I'll be gone;
503 My queen and all her elves come here anon!
504
5f42d1f2 505=head2 v5.19.0 - Batman, of the Joker, in "The Dark Knight Returns"
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506
507L<Announced on 2013-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201980.html>
508
509 From the beginning, I knew…
510 …that there was nothing wrong with you…
511 …that I can't fix…
512 …with my hands…
513
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514=head2 v5.18.2 - Miss Manners
515
516L<Announced on 2014-01-06 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/01/msg211224.html>
517
518One of the major mistakes people make is that they think manners are
519only the expression of happy ideas. There's a whole range of behavior
520that can be expressed in a mannerly way. That's what civilization is all
521about – doing it in a mannerly and not an antagonistic way. One of the
522places we went wrong was the naturalistic Rousseauean movement of the
523Sixties in which people said, "Why can't you just say what's on your
524mind?" In civilization there have to be some restraints. If we followed
525every impulse, we'd be killing one another.
526
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527=head2 v5.18.1 - Chuck Moore
528
529L<Announced on 2013-08-12 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/08/msg205897.html>
530
531The operating system is another concept that is curious. Operating
532systems are dauntingly complex and totally unnecessary. It’s a brilliant
533thing that Bill Gates has done in selling the world on the notion of
534operating systems. It’s probably the greatest con game the world has
535ever seen.
536
537An operating system does absolutely nothing for you. As long as you had
538something — a subroutine called disk driver, a subroutine called some
539kind of communication support, in the modern world, it doesn’t do
540anything else. In fact, Windows spends a lot of time with overlays and
541disk management all stuff like that which are irrelevant. You’ve got
542gigabyte disks; you’ve got megabyte RAMs. The world has changed in a way
543that renders the operating system unnecessary.
544
545=head2 v5.18.1-RC1 - Chuck Moore
546
547L<Announced on 2013-08-02 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/08/msg205445.html>
548
549Compilers are probably the worst code ever written. They are written by
550someone who has never written a compiler before and will never do so
551again. The more elaborate the language, the more complex, bug-ridden,
552and unusable is the compiler. But a simple compiler for a simple
553language is an essential tool—if only for documentation.
554
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555=head2 v5.18.0 - Yevgeny Zamyatin
556
557L<Announced on 2013-05-18 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201940.html>
558
559It is an error to divide people into the living and the dead: there are people
560who are dead-alive, and people who are alive-alive. The dead-alive also write,
561walk, speak, act. But they make no mistakes; only machines make no mistakes,
562and they produce only dead things. The alive-alive are constantly in error, in
563search, in questions, in torment.
564
565=head2 v5.18.0-RC4 - Joseph Heller, Catch-22
566
567L<Announced on 2013-04-16 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201889.html>
568
569Clevinger was dead. That was the basic flaw in his philosophy.
570
571=head2 v5.18.0-RC3 - Tom Waits, "The Ocean Doesn't Want Me"
572
573L<Announced on 2013-04-14 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201823.html>
574
575 I'd love to go drowning
576 And to stay and to stay
577 But the ocean doesn't want me today
578 I'll go in up to here
579 It can't possibly hurt
580 All they will find is my beer
581 And my shirt
582
583=head2 v5.18.0-RC2 - Tom Waits, "Earth Died Screaming"
584
585L<Announced on 2013-05-12 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201723.html>
586
587 And the great day of wrath has come
588 And here's mud in your big red eye
589 The poker's in the fire
590 And the locusts take the sky
591 And the earth died screaming
592 While I lay dreaming of you
593
594=head2 v5.18.0-RC1 - Tom Waits, "What's He Building in There?"
595
596L<Announced on 2013-05-11 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201651.html>
597
598 What's he building in there?
599
600 We have a right to know…
601
602=head2 v5.17.11 - Nigel Tufnel, This is Spın̈al Tap
603
604L<Announced on 2013-04-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/04/msg201056.html>
605
606It's very special because, if you can see, the numbers all go to…
607eleven! Look, right across the board: eleven, eleven, eleven, eleven!
608
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609=head2 v5.17.10 - Vernor Vinge, A Fire Upon The Deep
610
611L<Announced on 2013-03-22 by Max Maischein|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-03/msg00908.html>
612
613The archive informed the automation. Data structures were built, recipes
614followed. A local network was built, faster than anything on Straum, but surely
615safe. Nodes were added, modified by other recipes. The archive was a friendly
616place, with hierarchies of translation keys that led them along. Straum itself
617would be famous for this.
618
619Six months passed. A year.
620
621The omniscient view. Not self-aware really. Self-awareness is much over-rated.
622Most automation works far better as a part of a whole, and even if human-
623powerful, it does not need to self-know.
624
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625=head2 v5.16.3 - Devo, Freedom of Choice
626
627L<Announced on 2013-03-11 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-03/msg00414.html>
628
629 A victim of collision on the open sea
630 Nobody ever said that life was free
631 Sink, swim, go down with the ship
632 But use your freedom of choice
633
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634=head2 v5.14.4 - Arthur C. Clarke, The Nine Billion Names of God
635
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636L<Announced on 2013-03-11 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-03/msg00393.html>
637
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638He began to sing, but gave it up after a while. This vast arena of
639mountains, gleaming like whitely hooded ghosts on every side, did not
640encourage such ebullience. Presently George glanced at his watch.
641
642'Should be there in an hour,' he called back over his shoulder to
643Chuck. Then he added, in an afterthought: 'Wonder if the computer's
644finished its run. It was due about now.'
645
646Chuck didn't reply, so George swung round in his saddle. He could just
8af848c0 647see Chuck's face, a white oval turned towards the sky.
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648
649'Look,' whispered Chuck, and George lifted his eyes to heaven. (There
650is always a last time for everything.)
651
652Overhead, without any fuss, the stars were going out.
653
654
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655=head2 v5.17.9 - Douglas Adams, The Hitch-Hikers Guide to the Galaxy
656
657L<Announced on 2013-02-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-02/msg01146.html>
658
659Vogon poetry is of course, the third worst in the universe.
660The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a
661recitation by their poet master Grunthos the Flatulent of
662his poem 'Ode To A Small Lump of Green Putty I Found In My
663Armpit One Midsummer Morning' four of his audience died
664of internal haemorrhaging and the president of the
665Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one
666of his own legs off. Grunthos is reported to have been
667'disappointed' by the poem's reception, and was about to
668embark on a reading of his twelve-book epic entitled
669'My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles' when his own major intestine,
670in a desperate attempt to save life and civilisation,
671leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain.
672
673The very worst poetry of all perished along with its creator
674Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Greenbridge, Essex, England,
675in the destruction of the planet Earth.
676
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677=head2 v5.17.8 - Iain Pears, An Instance of the Fingerpost
678
679L<Announced on 2013-01-20 by Aaron Crane|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-01/msg00518.html>
680
681I must here declare myself as someone who does not for a moment subscribe to
682the general view that a willingness to perform oneself is detrimental to the
683dignity of experimental philosophy. There is, after all, a clear distinction
684between labour carried out for financial reward, and that done for the
685improvement of mankind: to put it another way, Lower as a philosopher was
686fully my equal even if he fell away when he became the practising physician.
687I think ridiculous of certain professors of anatomy, who find it beneath
688them to pick up the knife themselves, but merely comment while hired hands
689do the cutting. Sylvius would never have dreamt of sitting on a dais reading
b86ac955 690from an authority while others cut — when he taught, the knife was
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AC
691in his hand and the blood spattered his coat. Boyle also did not scruple to
692perform his own experiments and, on one occasion in my presence, even showed
693himself willing to anatomise a rat with his very own hands. Nor was he less
694a gentleman when he had finished. Indeed, in my opinion, his stature was all
695the greater, for in Boyle wealth, humility and curiosity mingled, and the
696world is richer for it.
697
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698=head2 v5.17.7 - R. Scott Bakker, The Darkness That Comes Before
699
700L<Announced on 2012-12-18 by Dave Rolsky|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-12/msg00679.html>
701
702No thought.
703 The boy extinguished. Only a place.
704 This place.
705 Motionless, the Pragma sat facing him, the bare soles of his feet flat against each other, his dark frock scored by the shadows of deep folds, his eyes as empty as the child they watched.
706 A place without breath or sound. A place of sight alone. A place without before or after . . . almost.
707 For the first lances of sunlight careered over the glacier, as ponderous as great tree limbs in the wind. Shadows hardened and light gleamed across the Pragma’s ancient skull.
708 The old man’s left hand forsook his right sleeve, bearing a watery knife. And like a rope in water, his arm pitched outward, fingertips trailing across the blade as the knife swung languidly into the air, the sun skating and the dark shrine plunging across its mirror back . . .
709 And the place where Kellhus had once existed extended an open hand—the blond hairs like luminous filaments against tanned skin—and grasped the knife from stunned space.
710 The slap of pommel against palm triggered the collapse of place into little boy. The pale stench of his body. Breath, sound, and lurching thoughts.
711 I have been legion . . .
712 In his periphery, he could see the spike of the sun ease from the mountain. He felt drunk with exhaustion. In the recoil of his trance, it seemed all he could hear were the twigs arching and bobbing in the wind, pulled by leaves like a million sails no bigger than his hand. Cause everywhere, but amid countless minute happenings—diffuse, useless.
713 Now I understand.
714
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715=head2 v5.17.6 - Kurt Vonnegut, The Sirens of Titan
716
717L<Announced on 2012-11-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-11/msg00760.html>
718
719Beatrice, looking like a gypsy queen, smoldered at the foot of a statue
720of a young physical student. At first glance, the laboratory-gowned
721scientist seemed to be a perfect servant of nothing but truth. At first
722glance, one was convinced that nothing but truth could please him as he
723beamed at his test tube. At first glance, one thought that he was as
724much above the beastly concerns of mankind as the harmoniums in the
725caves of Mercury. There, at first glance, was a young man without
726vanity, without lust — and one accepted at its face value the title Salo
727had engraved on the statue, "Discovery of Atomic Power."
728
87af396a
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729=head2 v5.12.5 - William Shakespeare, Measure for Measure
730
731Announced on 2012-11-10 by Dominic Hargreaves
732
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733 Music oft hath such a charm
734 To make bad good, and good provoke to harm.
87af396a 735
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736=head2 v5.16.2 - Stanislaw Lem, The Cyberiad, Trurl's Machine
737
738L<Announced on 2012-11-01 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-11/msg00017.html>
739
740Once upon a time Trurl the constructor built an eight-story thinking
741machine. When it was finished, he gave it a coat of white paint,
742trimmed the edges in lavender, stepped back, squinted, then added a
743little curlicue on the front and, where one might imagine the forehead
744to be, a few pale orange polkadots. Extremely pleased with himself,
e4a5e942 745he whistled an air and, as is always done on such occasions, asked it
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746the ritual question of how much is two plus two.
747
748The machine stirred. Its tubes began to glow, its coils warmed up,
749current coursed through all its circuits like a waterfall,
750transformers hummed and throbbed, there was a clanging, and a
751chugging, and such an ungodly racket that Trurl began to think of
752adding a special mentation muffler. Meanwhile the machine labored on,
753as if it had been given the most difficult problem in the Universe to
754solve; the ground shook, the sand slid underfoot from the vibration,
755valves popped like champagne corks, the relays nearly gave way under
756the strain. At last, when Trurl had grown extremely impatient, the
757machine ground to a halt and said in a voice like thunder: SEVEN!
758
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759=head2 v5.17.5 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky"
760
bc9f67ba 761L<Announced on 2012-10-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-10/msg01007.html>
6720b7ff
FR
762
763Neither of them noticed the pair of polka-dotted knickers hiding
764behind the ventilation duct overhead, listening patiently and
765recording everything.
766
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FR
767=head2 v5.17.4 - Roald Dahl, "Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf"
768
769L<Announced on 2012-09-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-09/msg01226.html>
770
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771 The small girl smiles. One eyelid flickers.
772 She whips a pistol from her knickers.
773 She aims it at the creature's head,
774 And bang bang bang, she shoots him dead.
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776 A few weeks later, in the wood,
777 I came across Miss Riding Hood.
778 But what a change! No cloak of red,
779 No silly hood upon her head.
780 She said, "Hello, and do please note
781 My lovely furry wolfskin coat."
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783=head2 v5.17.3 - Kris Ta-belle, "Smoked Perl Onion Soup"
784
785L<Announced on 2012-08-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/08/msg190775.html>
786
787Preparation:
788
789Cut 16 Perl Onions into quarters and put them in a grill smoker rack
790or a perforated pan over a BBQ using hickory wood chips or Special
791Blend Smoker Bisquettes. Smoke them for an hour and remove once they
792look golden brown.
793Let them cool and put them in the fridge (or freezer) until you are
794ready to create the soup.
795
796Ingredients:
797
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798 16 diced, pre-smoked, Perl Onions
799 3 tbsp butter
800 1/4 cup olive oil
801 2 small garlic cloves, finely minced
802 1 tsp salt
803 1 tsp sugar
804 black pepper to taste
805 1 cup red wine
806 1/4 cup all purpose flour
807 6 cups of beef or vegetable stock
808 1 cup of thick cream (milk can be used as a substitute)
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809
810Method:
811
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812 Melt the butter in a pan and then add olive oil.
813 Heat and add the onions to caramelize over a medium-high heat for up
814 to half an hour.
815 Add the garlic, turn down the heat and cook for a further 5 minutes.
816 Add the salt, pepper and sugar.
817 Now add the red wine and reduce to a jam like consistency.
818 Add the flour, stir well and add the stock a cup at a time.
819 Simmer for 30 minutes, add the cream and heat to almost boiling.
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820
821Enjoy.
822
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TC
823=head2 v5.17.2 - Terry Pratchet, "The Colour of Magic"
824
3d76f962 825L<Announced on 2012-07-21 by TonyC|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/07/msg189828.html>
d7846122
TC
826
827‘I knew it,’ said Rincewind. ‘We're in a strong magical field.’
828
829Twoflower and Hrun looked around the little hollow where they had made
830their noonday halt. Then they looked at each other.
831
832The horses were quietly cropping the rich grass by the stream. Yellow
833butterflies skittered among the bushes. There was a smell of thyme
834and a buzzing of bees. The wild pigs on the spit sizzled gently.
835
836Hrun shrugged and went back to oiling his biceps. They gleamed.
837
838‘Looks alright to me,’ he said.
839
840‘Try tossing a coin,’ said Rincewind.
841
842‘What?’
843
844‘Go on. Toss a coin.’
845
846‘Hokay,’ said Hrun. 'If that gives you any pleasure.’ He reached into
847his pouch and withdrew a handful of loose change plundered from a
848dozen realms. With some care he selected a Zchloty leaden
849quarter-iotum and balanced it on a purple thumbnail.
850
851‘You call,’ he said. ‘Heads or—’ he inspected the obverse with
852an air of intense concentration, ‘some sort of a fish with legs.’
853
854‘When it's in the air,’ said Rincewind. Hrun grinned and flicked his thumb.
855
856The iotum rose, spinning.
857
858‘Edge,’ said Rincewind, without looking at it.
859
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860=head2 v5.17.1 - Rand Miller, "Myst: The Book of Ti'ana"
861
862L<Announced on 2012-06-20 by doy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/06/msg188354.html>
863
864On their return from Ko'ah, Aitrus had shown her the Book, patiently
865taking her through page after page, and showing her how such an Age was
866"made." She had seen at once the differences between this archaic form
867and the ordinary written speech of the D'ni, noting how it was not
868merely more elaborate but more specific: a language of precise yet
869subtle descriptive power. Yet seeing was one thing, believing another.
870Given all the evidence, her rational mind still fought against accepting
871it.
872
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873=head2 v5.17.0 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky"
874
f51b9d59 875L<Announced on 2012-05-26 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/05/msg187214.html>
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Z
876
877`Welcome, comrades!' Burya opened his arms toward the soldier.
878`Yes it is true! With help from our allies of the Festival, the iron
879hand of the reactionary junta is about to be overthrown for all time!
880The new economy is being born; the marginal cost of production has
881been abolished, and from now on, if any item is produced once, it can
882be replicated infinitely. From each according to his imagination,
883to each according to his needs! Join us or better still, bring your
884fellow soldiers and workers to join us!'
885
886There was a sharp bang from the roof of the Corn Exchange, right at the
887climax of his impromptu speech; heads turned in alarm. Something had
888broken inside the spork factory and a stream of rainbow-hued plastic
889implements fountained toward the sky and clattered to the cobblestones
890on every side, like a harbinger of the postindustrial society to come.
891Workers and peasants alike stared in open-mouthed bewilderment at this
892astounding display of productivity, then bent to scrabble in the muck
893for the brightly colored sporks of revolution. A volley of shots rang
894out and Burya Rubenstein raised his hands, grinning wildly, to accept
895the salute of the soldiers from the Skull Hill garrison.
896
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897=head2 v5.16.1 - Emerald Rose - Never Split The Party
898
899L<Announced on 2012-08-08 by Ricardo
900Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-08/msg00307.html>
901
902 Don't you know? You never split the party
903 Clerics in the back to keep those fighters hale and hearty
904 The wizard in the middle, where he can shed some light
905 And you never let that damn thief out of sight…
906
907 -- Emerald Rose, Never Split The Party
908
909=head2 v5.16.1 RC1 - Tom Moldvay - Dungeons & Dragons
910
911L<Announced on 2012-08-03 by Ricardo
912Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-08/msg00157.html>
913
914I was busy rescuing the captured maiden when the dragon showed up.
915Fifty feed of scaled terror glared down at us with smoldering red eyes.
916Tendrils of smoke drifted out from between fangs larger than daggers.
917The dragon blocked the only exit from the cave.
918
919
920
921I unwrapped the sword which the mysterious cleric had given me. The
922sword was golden-tinted steel. Its hilt was set with a rainbow
923collection of precious gems. I shouted my battle cry and charged
924
925My charge caught the dragon by surprise. Its titanic jaws snapped shut
926inches from my face. I swung the golden sword with both arms. The
927swordblade bit into the dragon's neck and continued through to the other
928side. With an earth-shaking crash, the dragon dropped dead at my feet.
929The magic sword had saved my life and ended the reign of the
930dragon-tyrant. The countryside was freed and I could return as a hero.
931
932 -- Tom Moldvay, Foreward to the Dungeons & Dragons Basic Rulebook
933
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934=head2 v5.16.0 - W.H. Auden - September 1, 1939
935
936L<Announced on 2012-05-20 by Ricardo
937Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-05/msg00728.html>
938
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939 All I have is a voice
940 To undo the folded lie,
941 The romantic lie in the brain
942 Of the sensual man-in-the-street
943 And the lie of Authority
944 Whose buildings grope the sky:
945 There is no such thing as the State
946 And no one exists alone;
947 Hunger allows no choice
948 To the citizen or the police;
949 We must love one another or die.
950
951 -- W.H. Auden, September 1, 1939
4c4c16b2 952
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953=head2 v5.15.9 - Bob Dylan - Blowin' In The Wind
954
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A
955L<Announced on 2012-03-20 by
956Abigail|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/184824>
957
958 How many roads must a man walk down
959 Before you call him a man?
960 Yes, 'n' how many seas must a white dove sail
961 Before she sleeps in the sand?
962 Yes, 'n' how many times must the cannonballs fly
963 Before they're forever banned?
964 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
965 The answer is blowin' in the wind
966
967 How many years can a mountain exist
968 Before it's washed to the sea?
969 Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
970 Before they're allowed to be free?
971 Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head
972 Pretending he just doesn't see?
973 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
974 The answer is blowin' in the wind
975
976 How many times must a man look up
977 Before he can see the sky?
978 Yes, 'n' how many ears must one man have
979 Before he can hear people cry?
980 Yes, 'n' how many deaths will it take till he knows
981 That too many people have died?
982 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
983 The answer is blowin' in the wind
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984
985 -- Bob Dylan, Spring 1962
986
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987=head2 v5.15.8 - The KLF - The Manual-How To Have A Number One The Easy Way
988
989L<Announced on 2012-02-20 by Max
990Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/02/msg183919.html>
991
992 "Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
993 Doctor Who, in the Tardis
994 Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
995 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who
996 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who"
997
998Gibberish of course, but every lad in the country under a certain
999age related instinctively to what it was about. The ones slightly
1000older needed a couple of pints inside them to clear away the mind
1001debris left by the passing years before it made sense. As for
1002girls and our chorus, we think they must have seen it as pure crap.
1003A fact that must have limited to zero our chances of staying at The
1004Top for more than one week.
1005
1006Stock, Aitkin and Waterman, however, are kings of writing chorus
1007lyrics that go straight to the emotional heart of the 7" single
1008buying girls in this country. Their most successful records will kick
1009into the chorus with a line which encapsulates the entire emotional
1010meaning of the song. This will obviously be used as the title. As
1011soon as Rick Astley hit the first line of the chorus on his debut
1012single it was all over - the Number One position was guaranteed:
1013
1014 "I'm never going to give you up"
1015
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1016=head2 v5.15.7 - Penelope Lively, The Voyage of QV66
1017
1018L<Announced on 2012-01-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams
1019|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/01/msg182230.html>
1020
1021"Laboratories," announced Henry. "Kindly don't touch anything."
1022
1023He led us into a long low brick shed. Outside there was a
1024notice on a piece of board, crudely printed in red paint,
1025which said GRATE SIENCE DISCOVERYS DONE HERE SSSH! BRING YOUR
1026OWN BUKKIT NO PINCHING ANYWUN ELSE'S EXPERRYMENTS CANTEEN OPEN
1027ALL DAY CHIMPS ONLY.
1028
1029There were a lot of large black monkeys inside, all intently
1030busy on what they were doing. Some of them were pouring stuff
1031out of bottles into buckets and carefully stirring the ensuing
1032mixture; others were at work with glass tubes and jars, blowing
1033and measuring and mixing; others were crouched over long benches
1034with tools and heaps of bits and pieces of metal, cutting and
1035bending and constructing. There was a great deal of noise and
1036chatter. Every now and then one of them would give a whoop of
1037excitement and all the others would gather round and jump up and
1038down cheering and applauding.
1039
1040"Chimps," said Henry. "They're awfully clever."
1041
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1042=head2 v5.15.6 - Ursula K. Leguin, A Wizard of Earthsea
1043
489db6ed
DR
1044L<Announced on 2011-12-20 by Dave
1045Rolsky|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/12/msg180962.html>
b0d358f0
DR
1046
1047Ged had thought that as the prentice of a great mage he would enter at once
1048into the mystery and mastery of power. He would understand the language of the
1049beasts and the speech of the leaves of the forest, he thought, and sway the
1050winds with his word, and learn to change himself into any shape he
1051wished. Maybe he and his master would run together as stags, or fly to Re Albi
1052over the mountain on the wings of eagles.
1053
1054But it was not so at all. They wandered, first down into the Vale and then
1055gradually south and westward around the mountain, given lodging in little
1056villages or spending the night out in the wilderness, like poor
1057journeyman-sorcerers, or tinkers, or beggars. They entered no mysterious
1058domain. Nothing happened. The mage's oaken staff that Ged had watched at first
1059with eager dread was nothing but a stout staff to walk with. Three days went
1060by and four days went by and still Ogion had not spoken a single charm in
1061Ged's hearing, and had not taught him a single name or rune or spell.
1062
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1063=head2 v5.15.5 - Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman
1064
1065L<Announced on 2011-11-20 by Steve
1066Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/11/msg179588.html>
1067
1068This day - is a day of the greatest solemnity! Spain has a king. He has
1069been found. I am that king. Only this very day did I learn of it. I
1070confess, it came to me suddenly in a flash of lightning. I don't understand
1071how I could have thought and imagined that I was a titular councillor. How
1072could such a wild notion enter my head? It's a good thing no one thought of
1073putting me in an insane asylum. Now everything is laid open before me. Now
1074I see everything as on the palm of my hand. And before, I don't understand,
1075before everything around me was in some sort of fog. And all this happens, I
1076think, because people imagine that the human brain is in the head. Not at
1077all: it is brought by a wind from the direction of the Caspian Sea. First
1078off, I announced to Mavra who I am. When she heard that the king of Spain
1079was standing before her, she clasped her hands and nearly died of fright.
1080The stupid woman had never seen a king of Spain before. However, I
1081endeavoured to calm her down and assured her in gracious words of my
1082benevolence and that I was not at all angry that she sometimes polished my
1083boots poorly. They're benighted folk. It's impossible to tell them about
1084lofty matters. She got frightened because she's convinced that all kings of
1085Spain are like Philip II. But I explained to her that there was no
1086resemblance between me and Philip II, and that I didn't have a single
1087Capuchin . . . I didn't go to the office . . . To hell with it! No friends,
1088you won't lure me there now; I'm not going to copy your vile papers!
1089
1090 -- Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman,
1091 trans. Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky
1092
1542e678
FR
1093=head2 v5.15.4 - Steve Jobs
1094
1095L<Announced on 2011-10-20 by Florian
1096Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/10/msg178412.html>
1097
1098A lot of people in our industry haven't had very diverse experiences. So they
1099don't have enough dots to connect, and they end up with very linear solutions
1100without a broad perspective on the problem. The broader one's understanding of
1101the human experience, the better design we will have.
1102
413f5093
DH
1103=head2 v5.14.3 - William Shakespeare, As You Like It
1104
0bce251c 1105L<Announced on 2012-10-12 by Dominic Hargreaves|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/10/msg194057.html>
413f5093
DH
1106
1107 The poor world is almost six thousand years old, and in all
1108 this time there was not any man died in his own person,
1109 videlicit, in a love-cause. Troilus had his brains dashed
1110 out with a Grecian club; yet he did what he could to die
1111 before, and he is one of the patterns of love. Leander, he
1112 would have lived many a fair year, though Hero had turned
1113 nun, if it had not been for a hot midsummer night; for, good
1114 youth, he went but forth to wash him in the Hellespont and
1115 being taken with the cramp was drowned and the foolish
1116 coroners of that age found it was 'Hero of Sestos.' But these
1117 are all lies: men have died from time to time and worms have
1118 eaten them, but not for love.
1119
1120 -- As You Like It, William Shakespeare
1121
c684cf36 1122=head2 v5.14.2 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
21677d22
FR
1123
1124L<Announced on 2011-09-26 by Florian
1125Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177618.html>
1126
1127
1128It's not so much that people don't value the programs after they have them--they
1129do value them. But they're not the sort of thing that would ever catch on if
1130they had to overcome the marketing barrier. (I don't yet know if perl will
1131catch on at all--I'm worried enough about it that I specifically included an
1132awk-to-perl translator just to help it catch on.) Maybe it's all just an
1133inferiority complex. Or maybe I don't like to be mercenary.
1134
1135So I guess I'd say that the reason some software comes free is that the
1136mechanism for selling it is missing, either from the work environment, or from
1137the heart of the programmer.
1138
1139
607b15aa
SL
1140=head2 v5.15.3 - Oscar Wilde, All Art is Quite Useless
1141
ca420de3
SL
1142L<Announced on 2011-09-20 by Stevan
1143Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177427.html>
1144
607b15aa
SL
1145 All art is at once surface and symbol. Those who go beneath
1146 the surface do so at their peril. Those who read the symbol
1147 do so at their peril.
1148
1149 It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors.
1150 Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the
1151 work is new, complex, and vital. When critics disagree, the
1152 artist is in accord with himself.
1153
1154 We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as
1155 he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless
1156 thing is that one admires it intensely.
1157
1158 All art is quite useless.
1159
1160 -- Oscar Wilde, From the preface to The Picture of Dorian Gray
1161
1162
bfb65171
RS
1163=head2 v5.15.2 - Rainer Maria Rilke, The Third Duina Elegy
1164
1165L<Announced on 2011-08-20 by Ricardo
1166Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-08/msg00694.html>
1167
5814c912
RS
1168 True, it is strange to live no more on earth,
1169 no longer follow the folkways scarecely learned;
1170 not to give roses and other especially auspicious
1171 things the significance of a human future;
1172 to be no more what one was in infinitely anxious hands,
1173 and to put aside even one's name, like a broken plaything.
1174 Strange, to wish wishes no longer. Strange, to see
1175 all that was related fluttering so loosely in space.
1176 And being dead is hard, full of catching-up,
1177 so that finally one feels a little eternity.–
1178 But the living all make the mistake of too sharp discrimination.
1179 Often angels (it's said) don't know if they move
1180 among the quick or the dead. The eternal current
1181 hurtles all ages along with it forever
1182 through both realms and drowns their voices in both.
bfb65171
RS
1183
1184 -- Rainer Maria Rilke, Duino, The First Elegy
1185 trans., C. F. MacIntyre
1186
1889cb12
Z
1187=head2 v5.15.1 - Greg Egan, "Permutation City"
1188
2ccefb8a 1189L<Announced on 2011-07-20 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/07/msg175014.html>
1889cb12
Z
1190
1191Carter held out a hand towards the middle of the room. `See that
1192fountain?' A ten-metre-wide marble wedding cake, topped with a
1193winged cherub wrestling a serpent, duly appeared. Water cascaded
1194down from a gushing wound in the cherub's neck. Carter said, `It's
1195being computed by redundancies in the sketch of the city. I can
1196extract the results, because I know exactly where to look for them --
1197but nobody else would have a hope in hell of picking them out.'
1198
1199Peer walked up to the fountain. Even as he approached, he noticed
1200that the spray was intangible; when he dipped his hand in the water
1201around the base he felt nothing, and the motion he made with his
1202fingers left the foaming surface unchanged. They were spying on
1203the calculations, not interacting with them; the fountain was a
1204closed system.
1205
1206Carter said, `In your case, of course, nobody will need to know
1207the results. Except you -- and you'll know them because you'll
1208/be/ them.'
1209
452ead5e
DG
1210=head2 v5.15.0 - Neil Gaiman, "The Graveyard Book"
1211
1212L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173748.html>
1213
1214 If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all
1215 you will have gained.
1216
b3c5102d
LB
1217=head2 v5.12.4 - William Schwenck Gilbert, "Trial By Jury"
1218
1219L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173725.html>
1220
5814c912
RS
1221 You cannot eat breakfast all day,
1222 Nor is it the act of a sinner,
1223 When breakfast is taken away,
1224 To turn his attention to dinner;
1225 And it's not in the range of belief,
1226 To look upon him as a glutton,
1227 Who, when he is tired of beef,
1228 Determines to tackle the mutton.
1229 Ah! But this I am willing to say,
1230 If it will appease her sorrow,
1231 I'll marry this lady today,
1232 And I'll marry the other tomorrow!
b3c5102d 1233
c684cf36 1234=head2 v5.14.1 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
901b3fdb
LB
1235
1236L<Announced on 2011-06-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173650.html>
1237
1238At this point I'm no longer working for a company that makes me sign
1239my life away, but by now I'm in the habit. Besides, I still harbor
1240the deep-down suspicion that nobody would pay money for what I write,
1241since most of it just helps you do something better that you could
1242already do some other way. How much money would you personally pay
1243to upgrade from readnews to rn? How much money would you pay for
1244the patch program? As for warp, it's a mere game. And anything you
1245can do with perl you can eventually do with an amazing and totally
1246unreadable conglomeration of awk, sed, sh and C.
1247
1248=head2 v5.12.4-RC2 - James Russell Lowell, "Eleanor makes macaroons"
1249
1250L<Announced on 2011-06-15 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173609.html>
1251
5814c912
RS
1252 Now for sugar, -- nay, our plan
1253 Tolerates no work of man.
1254 Hurry, then, ye golden bees;
1255 Fetch your clearest honey, please,
1256 Garnered on a Yorkshire moor,
1257 While the last larks sing and soar,
1258 From the heather-blossoms sweet
1259 Where sea-breeze and sunshine meet,
1260 And the Augusts mask as Junes, --
1261 Eleanor makes macaroons!
901b3fdb 1262
7fdfa5b9
LB
1263=head2 v5.12.4-RC1 - Ogden Nash, "The Clean Plater"
1264
1265L<Announced on 2011-06-08 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173352.html>
1266
5814c912
RS
1267 Pheasant is pleasant, of course,
1268 And terrapin, too, is tasty,
1269 Lobster I freely endorse,
1270 In pate or patty or pasty.
1271 But there's nothing the matter with butter,
1272 And nothing the matter with jam,
1273 And the warmest greetings I utter
1274 To the ham and the yam and the clam.
1275 For they're food,
1276 All food,
1277 And I think very fondly of food.
1278 Through I'm broody at times
1279 When bothered by rhymes,
1280 I brood
1281 On food.
7fdfa5b9 1282
c684cf36 1283=head2 v5.14.0 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
8b55b028
ZA
1284
1285L<Announced on 2011-05-14 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172326.html>
1286
1287At the start of any project, I'm programming primarily to please
1288myself. (The two chief virtues in a programmer are laziness and
1289impatience.) After a while somebody looks over my shoulder and says,
1290"That's neat. It'd be neater if it did such-and-so." So the thing
1291gets neater. Pretty soon (a year or two) I have an rn, a warp, a patch,
1292or a perl. One of these years I'll have a metaconfig.
1293
1294I then say to myself, "I don't want my life's work to die when this
1295computer is scrapped, so I should let some other people use this. If I
1296ask my company to sell this, it'll never see the light of day, and nobody
1297would pay much for it anyway. If I sell it myself, I'll be in trouble with
1298my company, to whom I signed my life away when I was hired. If I give it
1299away, I can pretend it was worthless in the first place, so my company
1300won't care. In any event, it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission."
1301
1302So a freely distributable program is born.
1303
1304=head2 v5.14.0-RC3 - American Airlines Gate Agent, last call
1305
1306L<Announced on 2011-05-11 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172282.html>
1307
1308This is the last call for flight 1697 with service to Chicago and
1309continuing service to San Francisco. All passengers should already be
1310aboard. If you aren't aboard at this time, you will be denied boarding
1311and your bags will be offloaded.
1312
1313=head2 v5.14.0-RC2 - Greg Grandin, Fordlandia, "the Rise and Fall of Henry Ford's Forgotten Jungle City"
1314
1315L<Announced on 2011-05-04 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg171879.html>
1316
1317Over the course of nearly two decades, Ford would spend tens of millions
1318of dollars founding not one but, after the plantation was defastated
1319by leaf blight, two American towns, complete with central squares,
1320sidewalks, indoor plumbing, hospitals, manicured lawns, movie theaters,
1321swimming pools, golf courses, and, of course, Model Ts and As rolling
1322down their paved streets.
1323
1324Back in America, newspapers kept up their drumbeat celebration, only
1325obliquely referencing reports that things were not progressing as the
1326company had hoped. But there was one note of skepticism. In late 1928,
1327the Washington Post ran an editorial that read in its entirety: "Ford will
1328govern a rubber plantation in Brazil larger than North Carolina. This is
1329the first time he has applied quantity production methods to trouble"
1330
1331=head2 v5.14.0-RC1 - Bill Bryson, "In a Sunburned Country"
1332
1333L<Announced on 2011-04-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/04/msg171253.html>
1334
1335But then Australia is such a difficult country to keep track of. On
1336my first visit, some years ago, I passed the time on the long flight
1337reading a history of Australian politics in the twentieth century,
1338wherein I encountered the startling fact that in 1967 the prime minister,
1339Harold Holt, was strolling along a beach in Victoria when he plunged into
1340the surf and vanished. No trace of the poor man was ever seen again.
b86ac955 1341This seemed doubly astounding to me—first that Australia could
8b55b028
ZA
1342just I<lose> a prime minister (I mean, come on) and second that news of
1343this had never reached me.
1344
04496198
FR
1345=head2 v5.13.11 - Walt Whitman, L<Leaves of Grass|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leaves_of_Grass>
1346
1347L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-03/msg00560.html>
1348
1349 When the full-grown poet came,
1350 Out spake pleased Nature (the round impassive globe, with all its
1351 shows of day and night,) saying, He is mine;
1352 But out spake too the Soul of man, proud, jealous and unreconciled,
1353 Nay he is mine alone;
1354 --Then the full-grown poet stood between the two, and took each
1355 by the hand;
c2a00619
KW
1356 And to-day and ever so stands, as blender, uniter, tightly
1357 holding hands,
04496198
FR
1358 Which he will never release until he reconciles the two,
1359 And wholly and joyously blends them.
1360
c7bed260 1361=head2 v5.13.10 - Egill Skalla-Grímsson, L<Egils saga Skalla-Grímssonar|http://www.heimskringla.no/wiki/Egils_saga_Skalla-Gr%C3%ADmssonar>
f1e17f6f 1362
fbc70a9e 1363L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Ævar Arnfjörð Bjarmason|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/02/msg169340.html>
30688243 1364
806849f8
FR
1365 Skalat maðr rúnar rísta,
1366 nema ráða vel kunni.
1367 Þat verðr mörgum manni,
1368 es of myrkvan staf villisk.
1369 Sák á telgðu talkni
1370 tíu launstafi ristna.
1371 Þat hefr lauka lindi
f1e17f6f 1372 langs ofrtrega fengit.
30688243 1373
79af17bd
AB
1374=head2 v5.13.9 - John F Kennedy, L<Inaugural Address January 20, 1961|http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/John_F._Kennedy%27s_Inaugural_Address>
1375
1376L<Announced on 2011-01-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168335.html>
1377
1378In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been
1379granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I
1380do not shrink from this responsibility -- I welcome it. I do not believe
1381that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other
1382generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this
1383endeavor will light our country and all who serve it. And the glow from
1384that fire can truly light the world.
1385
1386And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you;
1387ask what you can do for your country.
1388
1389My fellow citizens of the world, ask not what America will do for you,
1390but what together we can do for the freedom of man.
1391
1392Finally, whether you are citizens of America or citizens of the world,
1393ask of us here the same high standards of strength and sacrifice which
1394we ask of you. With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history
1395the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth to lead the land we love,
1396asking His blessing and His help, but knowing that here on earth God's
1397work must truly be our own.
1398
94521723
Z
1399=head2 v5.13.8 - Roger Williams, L<"The Fifth Gift"|http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/8/19/21304/8493>
1400
2831a86c
ZA
1401L<Announced on 2010-12-19 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/12/msg167271.html>
1402
94521723
Z
1403The aliens called the box a "matter generator," but we'd be more inclined
1404to call it a matter duplicator. By connecting switches and potentiometers
1405between the copper posts it was possible to make the box mark off two
1406cubic rectangular areas of volume. Make a certain contact, and these
1407areas would be isolated within perfectly reflective fields. They could
1408be expanded or contracted by altering resistances between other posts.
1409As I worked out the user interface I built a little control panel for
1410the device. It was actually a clever way for the aliens to do things;
1411instead of trying to build controls we could use, they built us an
1412interface we could attach to controls that made sense to us. It could
1413also be automated.
1414
1415Once you had made the contact that established the shielded volumes,
1416if you made another certain contact the contents of the first volume
1417were copied to the second. The machine copied metal, plastic, steel,
1418and diamond with equal ease. Copies of copies of copies of copies were
1419indistinguishable from the originals at any magnification, even using
1420techniques like X-ray crystallography.
1421
6b1649d0
CBW
1422=head2 v5.13.7 - Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski, 'The Matrix'
1423
2831a86c
ZA
1424L<Announced on 2010-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/11/msg166162.html>
1425
6b1649d0
CBW
1426[Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one]
1427
5814c912 1428 Neo: Whoa. Deja vu.
6b1649d0
CBW
1429
1430[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
1431
5814c912
RS
1432 Trinity: What did you just say?
1433 Neo: Nothing. Just had a little deja vu.
1434 Trinity: What did you see?
1435 Cypher: What happened?
89550e55
RS
1436 Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just
1437 like it.
5814c912
RS
1438 Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat?
1439 Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure.
1440 Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
1441 Neo: What is it?
89550e55
RS
1442 Trinity: A deja vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when
1443 they change something.
6b1649d0 1444
54cc2c9a
TM
1445=head2 v5.13.6 - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore"
1446
2831a86c
ZA
1447L<Announced on 2010-10-20 by Tatsuhiko Miyagawa|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/10/msg165183.html>
1448
54cc2c9a
TM
1449The boy called Crow softly rests a hand on my shoulder, and with that
1450he storm vanishes.
1451
1452"From now on -- no matter what -- you've got to be the world's toughest
1453fifteen-year-old. That's the only way you're going to survive. And in order
1454to do that, you've got to figure out what it means to be tough. You following
1455me?"
1456
1457I keep my eyes closed and don't reply. I just want to sink off into sleep
1458like this, his hand on my shoulder. I hear the faint flutter of wings.
1459
1460"You're going to be the world's toughest fifteen-year-old," Crow whispers
1461as I try to fall asleep. Like he was carving the words in a deep blue tattoo
1462on my heart.
1463
1464(Translated from Japanese by Philip Gabriel)
1465
f6c56125
SH
1466=head2 v5.13.5 - Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, "The Room in the Dragon Volant"
1467
2831a86c
ZA
1468L<Announced on 2010-09-19 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg164238.html>
1469
f6c56125
SH
1470Candle in hand I stepped in. I do not know whether the quality of
1471air, long undisturbed, is peculiar; to me it has always seemed so, and
1472the damp smell of the old masonry hung in this atmosphere. My candle
1473faintly lighted the bare stone wall that enclosed the stair, the foot
1474of which I could not see. Down I went, and a few turns brought me to
1475the stone floor. Here was another door, of the simple, old, oak kind,
1476deep sunk in the thickness of the wall. The large end of the key
1477fitted this. The lock was stiff; I set the candle down upon the
1478stair, and applied both hands; it turned with difficulty, and as it
1479revolved, uttered a shriek that alarmed me for my secret.
1480
1481For some minutes I did not move. In a little time, however, I took
1482courage, and opened the door. The night-air floating in puffed out
1483the candle. There was a thicket of holly and underwood, as dense as a
1484jungle, close about the door. I should have been in pitch-darkness,
1485were it not that through the topmost leaves there twinkled, here and
1486there, a glimmer of moonshine.
1487
1488Softly, lest any one should have opened his window at the sound of the
1489rusty bolt, I struggled through this till I gained a view of the open
1490grounds. Here I found that the brushwood spread a good way up the
1491park, uniting with the wood that approached the little temple I have
806849f8 1492described.
f6c56125 1493
fdea69f9
FR
1494=head2 v5.13.4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1495
2831a86c
ZA
1496L<Announced on 2010-08-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163150.html>
1497
fdea69f9
FR
1498`How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought Alice;
1499`I might as well be at school at once.' However, she got up, and began to repeat
1500it, but her head was so full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what
1501she was saying, and the words came very queer indeed:--
1502
1503 "'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare,
1504 "You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair."
1505 As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose
1506 Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.'
1507
1508
1509`That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' said the Gryphon.
1510
1511`Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it sounds uncommon
1512nonsense.'
1513
1514Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if
1515anything would ever happen in a natural way again.
1516
1517`I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle.
1518
1519`She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with the next verse.'
1520
1521`But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How could he turn them out
1522with his nose, you know?'
1523
1524`It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was dreadfully puzzled by
1525the whole thing, and longed to change the subject.
1526
0feeb912
DG
1527=head2 v5.13.3 - Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, "Good Omens"
1528
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ZA
1529L<Announced on 2010-07-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/07/msg162230.html>
1530
0feeb912
DG
1531Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading towards
1532Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would
1533notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth,
1534for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his
1535sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint.
1536
1537Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was
1538dammned if he wasn't going to finish it in the Bentley as well.
1539Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of
1540motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage
1541Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn't have been able to tell
1542that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it
1543had ever even been a car.
1544
1545There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have
1546been black, where it wasn't a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but
1547this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of
1548flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult
1549re-entry.
1550
1551There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the
1552metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still
1553somhow riding an inch above the road surface this didn't seem to
1554make an awful lot of difference to the suspension.
1555
1556It should have fallen apart miles back.
1557
3c55f444
MT
1558=head2 v5.13.2 - Iain M Banks, "Use of Weapons"
1559
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ZA
1560L<Announced on 2010-06-22 by Matt S Trout|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/06/msg161112.html>
1561
51caa79e
DG
1562We deal in the moral equivalent of black holes, where the normal laws -
1563the rules of right and wrong that people imagine apply everywhere else
1564in the universe - break down; beyond those metaphysical event-horizons,
3c55f444
MT
1565there exist ... special circumstances.
1566
1567=head2 v5.13.1 - Miguel de Unamuno, "The Sepulchre of Don Quixote"
d069c093 1568
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1569L<Announced on 2010-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160275.html>
1570
d069c093
RS
1571And if anyone shall come to you and say that he knows how to construct
1572bridges and that perhaps a time will come when you will wish to avail
1573yourself of his science in order to cross over a river, out with him! Out
1574with the engineer! Rivers will be crossed by wading or swimming them, even
1575if half the crusaders drown themselves. Let the engineer go off and build
1576bridges somewhere else, where they are badly wanted. For those who go in
1577quest of the sepulchre, faith is bridge enough.
1578
c7bed260
Z
1579=head2 v5.13.0 - Jules Verne, "A Journey to the Centre of the Earth"
1580
1581L<Announced on 2010-04-20 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg159275.html>
1582
1583The heat still remained at quite a supportable degree. With an
1584involuntary shudder, I reflected on what the heat must have been
1585when the volcano of Sneffels was pouring its smoke, flames, and
1586streams of boiling lava -- all of which must have come up by the
1587road we were now following. I could imagine the torrents of hot
1588seething stone darting on, bubbling up with accompaniments of
1589smoke, steam, and sulphurous stench!
1590
1591"Only to think of the consequences," I mused, "if the old
1592volcano were once more to set to work."
1593
1594=head2 v5.12.3 - Howard W. Campbell, Jr., "Reflections on Not Participating in Current Events"
1595
1596L<Announced on 2011-01-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168368.html>
1597
1598 I saw a huge steam roller,
1599 It blotted out the sun.
1600 The people all lay down, lay down;
1601 They did not try to run.
1602 My love and I, we looked amazed
1603 Upon the gory mystery.
1604 'Lie down, lie down!' the people cried.
1605 'The great machine is history!'
1606 My love and I, we ran away,
1607 The engine did not find us.
1608 We ran up to a mountain top,
1609 Left history far behind us.
1610 Perhaps we should have stayed and died,
1611 But somehow we don't think so.
1612 We went to see where history'd been,
1613 And my, the dead did stink so.
1614
1615=head2 v5.12.2 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
1616
1617L<Announced on 2010-09-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg163852.html>
1618
1619CPUs. Cayce Pollard Units. That's what Damien calls the clothing
1620she wears. CPUs are either black, white, or gray, and ideally
1621seem to have come into this world without human intervention.
1622
1623What people take for relentless minimalism is a side effect
1624of too much exposure to the reactor-cores of fashion. This
1625has resulted in a remorseless paring-down of what she can and
1626will wear. She is, literally, allergic to fashion. She can
1627only tolerate things that could have been worn, to a general
1628lack of comment, during any year between 1945 and 2000. She's a
1629design-free zone, a one-woman school of and whose very austerity
1630periodically threatens to spawn its own cult.
1631
1632=head2 v5.12.2-RC1 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
1633
1634L<Announced on 2010-08-31 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163670.html>
1635
1636The front page opens, familiar as a friend's living room. A frame-grab
1637from #48 serves as backdrop, dim and almost monochrome, no characters in
1638view. This is one of the sequences that generate comparisons with
1639Tarkovsky. She only knows Tarkovsky from stills, really, though she did
1640once fall asleep during a screening of The Stalker, going under on an
1641endless pan, the camera aimed straight down, in close-up, at a puddle on
1642a ruined mosaic floor. But she is not one of those who think that much
1643will be gained by analysis of the maker's imagined influences. The cult
1644of the footage is rife with subcults, claiming every possible influence.
1645Truffaut, Peckinpah -- The Peckinpah people, among the least likely, are
1646still waiting for the guns to be drawn.
1647
4363636d
DG
1648=head2 v5.12.1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
1649
2831a86c
ZA
1650L<Announced on 2010-05-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160109.html>
1651
4363636d
DG
1652"Now suppose," chortled Dr. Breed, enjoying himself, "that there were
1653many possible ways in which water could crystallize, could freeze.
d517a16a
Z
1654Suppose that the sort of ice we skate upon and put into highballs --
1655what we might call ice-one -- is only one of several types of ice.
4363636d
DG
1656Suppose water always froze as ice-one on Earth because it had never
1657had a seed to teach it how to form ice-two, ice-three, ice-four
1658...? And suppose," he rapped on his desk with his old hand again,
d517a16a
Z
1659"that there were one form, which we will call ice-nine -- a crystal as
1660hard as this desk -- with a melting point of, let us say, one-hundred
4363636d
DG
1661degrees Fahrenheit, or, better still, a melting point of one-hundred-
1662and-thirty degrees."
1663
4363636d
DG
1664=head2 v5.12.1-RC2 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
1665
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ZA
1666L<Announced on 2010-05-13 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160066.html>
1667
4363636d
DG
1668San Lorenzo was fifty miles long and twenty miles wide, I learned from
1669the supplement to the New York Sunday Times. Its population was four
1670hundred, fifty thousand souls, "...all fiercely dedicated to the ideals
1671of the Free World."
1672
1673Its highest point, Mount McCabe, was eleven thousand feet above sea
1674level. Its capital was Bolivar, "...a strikingly modern city built on a
1675harbor capable of sheltering the entire United States Navy." The principal
1676exports were sugar, coffee, bananas, indigo, and handcrafted novelties.
1677
2831a86c
ZA
1678=head2 v5.12.1-RC1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
1679
1680L<Announced on 2010-05-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg159971.html>
4363636d 1681
4363636d
DG
1682Which brings me to the Bokononist concept of a wampeter. A wampeter is
1683the pivot of a karass. No karass is without a wampeter, Bokonon tells us,
1684just as no wheel is without a hub. Anything can be a wampeter: a tree,
1685a rock, an animal, an idea, a book, a melody, the Holy Grail. Whatever
1686it is, the members of its karass revolve about it in the majestic chaos
1687of a spiral nebula. The orbits of the members of a karass about their
1688common wampeter are spiritual orbits, naturally. It is souls and not
1689bodies that revolve. As Bokonon invites us to sing:
1690
1691 Around and around and around we spin,
1692 With feet of lead and wings of tin . . .
1693
4363636d
DG
1694=head2 v5.12.0 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1695
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ZA
1696L<Announced on 2010-04-12 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158820.html>
1697
4363636d
DG
1698'Please would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, for she was
1699not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, 'why
1700your cat grins like that?'
1701
1702'It's a Cheshire cat,' said the Duchess, 'and that's why. Pig!'
1703
1704She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite
1705jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby,
1706and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:--
1707
1708'I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know
1709that cats COULD grin.'
1710
1711'They all can,' said the Duchess; 'and most of 'em do.'
1712
4363636d
DG
1713=head2 v5.12.0-RC5 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1714
2831a86c
ZA
1715L<Announced on 2010-04-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158720.html>
1716
4363636d
DG
1717'Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly; 'some of the words
1718have got altered.'
1719
1720'It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar decidedly, and
1721there was silence for some minutes.
1722
4363636d
DG
1723=head2 v5.12.0-RC4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1724
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ZA
1725L<Announced on 2010-04-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158567.html>
1726
4363636d
DG
1727'It was much pleasanter at home,' thought poor Alice, 'when one wasn't
1728always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and
1729rabbits. I almost wish I hadn't gone down that rabbit-hole--and yet--and
1730yet--it's rather curious, you know, this sort of life! I do wonder what
1731can have happened to me! When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that
1732kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one!
1733
4363636d
DG
1734=head2 v5.12.0-RC3 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1735
2831a86c
ZA
1736L<Announced on 2010-04-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158346.html>
1737
4363636d
DG
1738At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them,
1739called out, 'Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL soon make you
1740dry enough!' They all sat down at once, in a large ring, with the Mouse
1741in the middle. Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt
1742sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon.
1743
1744'Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, 'are you all ready? This
1745is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! "William
1746the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was soon submitted
1747to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of late much
1748accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of
d517a16a 1749Mercia and Northumbria --"'
4363636d 1750
2831a86c 1751=head2 v5.12.0-RC2 - no announcement
4363636d 1752
2831a86c 1753Available on CPAN since 2010-04-01.
4363636d 1754
3e340399 1755=head2 v5.12.0-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
4363636d 1756
2831a86c
ZA
1757L<Announced on 2010-03-29 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg158060.html>
1758
4363636d
DG
1759So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the
1760hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of
1761making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and
1762picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran
1763close by her.
1764
1765There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice think it so
1766VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, 'Oh dear! Oh
1767dear! I shall be late!' (when she thought it over afterwards, it
1768occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this, but at the time
1769it all seemed quite natural); but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH
1770OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on,
1771Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had
1772never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to
1773take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the field
1774after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large
1775rabbit-hole under the hedge.
1776
1777In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how
1778in the world she was to get out again.
1779
0e6b8110 1780=head2 v5.12.0-RC0 - no epigraph
4363636d 1781
2831a86c 1782L<Announced on 2020-03-21 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg157761.html>
4363636d 1783
3e340399 1784=head2 v5.11.5 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "Christabel"
4363636d 1785
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ZA
1786L<Announced on 2010-02-21 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/02/msg156957.html>
1787
4363636d
DG
1788 A little child, a limber elf,
1789 Singing, dancing to itself,
1790 A fairy thing with red round cheeks,
1791 That always finds, and never seeks,
1792 Makes such a vision to the sight
1793 As fills a father's eyes with light;
1794 And pleasures flow in so thick and fast
1795 Upon his heart, that he at last
1796 Must needs express his love's excess
1797 With words of unmeant bitterness.
1798 Perhaps 'tis pretty to force together
1799 Thoughts so all unlike each other;
1800 To mutter and mock a broken charm,
1801 To dally with wrong that does no harm.
1802 Perhaps 'tis tender too and pretty
1803 At each wild word to feel within
1804 A sweet recoil of love and pity.
1805 And what, if in a world of sin
1806 (O sorrow and shame should this be true!)
1807 Such giddiness of heart and brain
1808 Comes seldom save from rage and pain,
1809 So talks as it's most used to do.
1810
4363636d
DG
1811=head2 v5.11.4 - Fyodor Dostoevsky, "Crime and Punishment"
1812
2831a86c
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1813L<Announced on 2010-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/01/msg155848.html>
1814
4363636d
DG
1815And you don't suppose that I went into it headlong like a fool? I went
1816into it like a wise man, and that was just my destruction. And you
1817mustn't suppose that I didn't know, for instance, that if I began to
1818question myself whether I had the right to gain power -- I certainly
1819hadn't the right -- or that if I asked myself whether a human being is a
1820louse it proved that it wasn't so for me, though it might be for a man
1821who would go straight to his goal without asking questions.... If I
1822worried myself all those days, wondering whether Napoleon would have
1823done it or not, I felt clearly of course that I wasn't Napoleon.
1824
4363636d
DG
1825=head2 v5.11.3 - Mark Twain, "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer"
1826
2831a86c
ZA
1827L<Announced on 2009-12-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/12/msg154838.html>
1828
4363636d 1829"Say -- I'm going in a swimming, I am. Don't you wish you could? But of
d517a16a 1830course you'd druther work -- wouldn't you? Course you would!"
4363636d
DG
1831
1832Tom contemplated the boy a bit, and said: "What do you call work?"
1833
1834"Why ain't that work?"
1835
1836Tom resumed his whitewashing, and answered carelessly: "Well, maybe it
1837is, and maybe it aint. All I know, is, it suits Tom Sawyer."
1838
1839"Oh come, now, you don't mean to let on that you like it?"
1840
1841The brush continued to move. "Like it? Well I don't see why I oughtn't
1842to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?"
1843
1844That put the thing in a new light. Ben stopped nibbling his apple. Tom
1845swept his brush daintily back and forth -- stepped back to note the effect
1846-- added a touch here and there-criticised the effect again -- Ben
1847watching every move and getting more and more interested, more and more
1848absorbed. Presently he said: "Say, Tom, let me whitewash a little."
1849
4363636d
DG
1850=head2 v5.11.2 - Michael Marshall Smith, "Only Forward"
1851
f0ccce9b 1852L<Announced on 2009-11-20 by Léon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/11/msg153646.html>
2831a86c 1853
4363636d
DG
1854The streets were pretty quiet, which was nice. They're always quiet here
1855at that time: you have to be wearing a black jacket to be out on the
1856streets between seven and nine in the evening, and not many people in
1857the area have black jackets. It's just one of those things. I currently
1858live in Colour Neighbourhood, which is for people who are heavily into
1859colour. All the streets and buildings are set for instant colourmatch:
1860as you walk down the road they change hue to offset whatever you're
1861wearing. When the streets are busy it's kind of intense, and anyone
1862prone to epileptic seizures isn't allowed to live in the Neighbourhood,
1863however much they're into colour.
1864
4363636d
DG
1865=head2 v5.11.1 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
1866
2831a86c
ZA
1867L<Announced on 2009-10-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg152360.html>
1868
4363636d
DG
1869Milo had been caught red-handed in the act of plundering his countrymen,
1870and, as a result, his stock had never been higher. He proved good as his
1871word when a rawboned major from Minnesota curled his lip in rebellious
1872disavowal and demanded his share of the syndicate Milo kept saying
1873everybody owned. Milo met the challenge by writing the words "A Share"
1874on the nearest scrap of paper and handing it away with a virtuous disdain
1875that won the envy and admiration of almost everyone who knew him. His
1876glory was at a peak, and Colonel Cathcart, who knew and admired his
b10ee209 1877war record, was astonished by the deferential humility with which Milo
4363636d
DG
1878presented himself at Group Headquarters and made his fantastic appeal
1879for more hazardous assignment.
1880
4363636d
DG
1881=head2 v5.11.0 - Mikhail Bulgakov, "The Master and Margarita"
1882
2831a86c
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1883L<Announced on 2009-10-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg151376.html>
1884
4363636d
DG
1885Whispers of an "evil power" were heard in lines at dairy shops, in
1886streetcars, stores, arguments, kitchens, suburban and long-distance
1887trains, at stations large and small, in dachas and on beaches. Needless
1888to say, truly mature and cultured people did not tell these stories
1889about an evil power's visit to the capital. In fact, they even made fun
1890of them and tried to talk sense into those who told them. Nevertheless,
1891facts are facts, as they say, and cannot simply be dismissed without
1892explanation: somebody had visited the capital. The charred cinders of
1893Griboyedov alone, and many other things besides, confirmed it. Cultured
1894people shared the point of view of the investigating team: it was the
1895work of a gang of hypnotists and ventriloquists magnificently skilled in
1896their art.
1897
4363636d
DG
1898=head2 v5.10.1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1899
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1900L<Announced on 2009-09-23 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150172.html>
1901
4363636d
DG
1902'Briefly, sir, I am the Permanent Under-Secretary of State, known as
1903the Permanent Secretary. Woolley here is your Principal Private
1904Secretary. I, too, have a Principal Private Secretary, and he is the
1905Principal Private Secretary to the Permanent Secretary. Directly
1906responsible to me are ten Deputy Secretaries, eighty-seven Under
1907Secretaries and two hundred and nineteen Assistant Secretaries.
1908Directly responsible to the Principal Private Secretaries are plain
1909Private Secretaries. The Prime Minister will be appointing two
1910Parliamentary Under-Secretaries and you will be appointing your own
1911Parliamentary Private Secretary.'
1912
1913'Can they all type?' I joked.
1914
1915'None of us can type, Minister,' replied Sir Humphrey smoothly. 'Mrs
1916McKay types - she is your Secretary.'
1917
1918I couldn't tell whether or not he was joking. 'What a pity,' I said.
1919'We could have opened an agency.'
1920
1921Sir Humphrey and Bernard laughed. 'Very droll, sir,' said Sir
1922Humphrey. 'Most amusing, sir,' said Bernard. Were they genuinely
1923amused at my wit, or just being rather patronising? 'I suppose they
1924all say that, do they?' I ventured.
1925
1926Sir Humphrey reassured me on that. 'Certainly not, Minister,' he
1927replied. 'Not quite all.'
1928
0e6b8110 1929=head2 v5.10.1-RC2 - no epigraph
4363636d 1930
2831a86c 1931L<Announced on 2009-08-18 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150015.html>
3e340399 1932
0e6b8110 1933=head2 v5.10.1-RC1 - no epigraph
4363636d 1934
2831a86c 1935L<Announced on 2009-08-06 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg149498.html>
3e340399 1936
c7bed260 1937=head2 v5.10.0 - Laurence Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
4363636d 1938
c7bed260
Z
1939L<Announced on 2007-12-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/12/msg131636.html>
1940
1941He would often declare, in speaking his thoughts upon the subject, that
1942he did not conceive how the greatest family in England could stand it
1943out against an uninterrupted succession of six or seven short
1944noses.--And for the contrary reason, he would generally add, That it
1945must be one of the greatest problems in civil life, where the same
1946number of long and jolly noses, following one another in a direct line,
1947did not raise and hoist it up into the best vacancies in the kingdom.
1948
1949=head2 v5.10.0-RC2 - no epigraph
1950
1951L<Announced on 2007-11-25 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130978.html>
1952
1953=head2 v5.10.0-RC1 - no epigraph
1954
1955L<Announced on 2007-11-17 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130653.html>
1956
1957=head2 v5.9.5 - no announcement
1958
1959L<Pre-announced on 2007-07-07 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/07/msg126358.html>,
1960available on CPAN with same date, but never actually announced.
1961
1962=head2 v5.9.4 - no epigraph
1963
1964L<Announced on 2006-08-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/08/msg115782.html>
1965
1966=head2 v5.9.3 - no epigraph
1967
1968L<Announced on 2006-01-28 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg109086.html>
1969
1970=head2 v5.9.2 - Thomas Pynchon, "V"
1971
1972L<Announced on 2005-04-01 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20050401150702.2b4a70d5@grubert.mandrakesoft.com>
1973
1974This word flip was weird. Every recording date of McClintic's he'd
1975gotten into the habit of talking electricity with the audio men and
1976technicians of the studio. McClintic once couldn't have cared less
1977about electricity, but now it seemed if that was helping him reach a
1978bigger audience, some digging, some who would never dig, but all
1979paying and those royalties keeping the Triumph in gas and McClintic
1980in J. Press suits, then McClintic ought to be grateful to
1981electricity, ought maybe to learn a little more about it. So he'd
1982picked up some here and there, and one day last summer he got around
1983to talking stochastic music and digital computers with one
1984technician. Out of the conversation had come Set/Reset, which was
1985getting to be a signature for the group. He had found out from this
1986sound man about a two-triode circuit called a flip-flop, which when
1987it turned on could be one of two ways, depending on which tube was
1988conducting and which was cut off: set or reset, flip or flop.
1989
1990"And that," the man said, "can be yes or no, or one or zero. And
1991that is what you might call one of the basic units, or specialized
1992`cells' in a big `electronic brain.' "
1993
1994"Crazy," said McClintic, having lost him back there someplace. But
1995one thing that did occur to him was if a computer's brain could go
1996flip or flop, why so could a musician's. As long as you were flop,
1997everything was cool. But where did the trigger-pulse come from to
1998make you flip?
1999
2000=head2 v5.9.1 - Tom Stoppard, "Arcadia"
2001
2002L<Announced on 2004-03-16 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/8587d77c565f2d43>
2003
2004Aren't you supposed to have a pony?
2005
2006=head2 v5.9.0 - Doris Lessing, "Martha Quest"
2007
2008L<Announced on 2003-10-27 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/63a8c34385de82a1>
2009
2010What of October, that ambiguous month
4363636d 2011
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2012=head2 v5.8.9 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
2013
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2014L<Announced on 2008-12-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/12/msg142571.html>
2015
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2016Frank and I, unlike the civil servants, were still puzzled that such a
2017proposal as the Europass could even be seriously under consideration by
2018the FCO. We can both see clearly that it is wonderful ammunition for the
2019anti-Europeans. I asked Humphrey if the Foreign Office doesn't realise
2020how damaging this would be to the European ideal?
2021
2022'I'm sure they do, Minister, he said. That's why they support it.'
2023
2024This was even more puzzling, since I'd always been under the impression
2025that the FO is pro-Europe. 'Is it or isn't it?' I asked Humphrey.
2026
2027'Yes and no,' he replied of course, 'if you'll pardon the
2028expression. The Foreign Office is pro-Europe because it is really
2029anti-Europe. In fact the Civil Service was united in its desire to make
2030sure the Common Market didn't work. That's why we went into it.'
2031
2032This sounded like a riddle to me. I asked him to explain further. And
2033basically his argument was as follows: Britain has had the same foreign
2034policy objective for at least the last five hundred years - to create a
2035disunited Europe. In that cause we have fought with the Dutch against
2036the Spanish, with the Germans against the French, with the French and
2037Italians against the Germans, and with the French against the Italians
2038and Germans. [The Dutch rebellion against Phillip II of Spain, the
2039Napoleonic Wars, the First World War, and the Second World War - Ed.]
2040
2041In other words, divide and rule. And the Foreign Office can see no
2042reason to change when it has worked so well until now.
2043
2044I was aware of this, naturally, but I regarded it as ancient history.
2045Humphrey thinks that it is, in fact, current policy. It was necessary
2046for us to break up the EEC, he explained, so we had to get inside. We
2047had previously tried to break it up from the outside, but that didn't
2048work. [A reference to our futile and short-lived involvement in EFTA,
2049the European Free Trade Association, founded in 1960 and which the UK
2050left in 1972 - Ed.] Now that we're in, we are able to make a complete
2051pig's breakfast out of it. We've now set the Germans against the French,
2052the French against the Italians, the Italians against the Dutch... and
2053the Foreign office is terribly happy. It's just like old time.
2054
2055I was staggered by all of this. I thought that the all of us who are
2056publicly pro-European believed in the European ideal. I said this to Sir
2057Humphrey, and he simply chuckled.
2058
2059So I asked him: if we don't believe in the European Ideal, why are we
2060pushing to increase the membership?
2061
2062'Same reason,' came the reply. 'It's just like the United Nations. The
2063more members it has, the more arguments you can stir up, and the more
2064futile and impotent it becomes.'
2065
2066This all strikes me as the most appalling cynicism, and I said so.
2067
2068Sir Humphrey agreed completely. 'Yes Minister. We call it
2069diplomacy. It's what made Britain great, you know.'
2070
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2071=head2 v5.8.9-RC2 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
2072
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2073L<Announced on 2008-12-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg142422.html>
2074
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2075There was silence in the office. I didn't know what we were going to do
2076about the four hundred new people supervising our economy drive or the
2077four hundred new people for the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office, or
2078anything! I simply sat and waited and hoped that my head would stop
2079thumping and that some idea would be suggested by someone sometime soon.
2080
2081Sir Humphrey obliged. 'Minister... if we were to end the economy drive
2082and close the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office we could issue an immediate
2083press announcement that you had axed eight hundred jobs.' He had
2084obviously thought this out carefully in advance, for at this moment he
2085produced a slim folder from under his arm. 'If you'd like to approve
2086this draft...'
2087
2088I couldn't believe the impertinence of the suggestion. Axed eight
2089hundred jobs? 'But no one was ever doing these jobs,' I pointed out
2090incredulously. 'No one's been appointed yet.'
2091
2092'Even greater economy,' he replied instantly. 'We've saved eight hundred
2093redundancy payments as well.'
2094
2095'But...' I attempted to explain '... that's just phony. It's dishonest,
2096it's juggling with figures, it's pulling the wool over people's eyes.'
2097
2098'A government press release, in fact.' said Humphrey.
2099
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2100=head2 v5.8.9-RC1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
2101
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2102L<Announced on 2008-11-10 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg141515.html>
2103
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2104A jumbo jet touched down, with BURANDAN AIRWAYS written on the side. I
2105was hugely impressed. British Airways are having to pawn their Concordes,
2106and here is this little tiny African state with its own airline, jumbo
2107jets and all.
2108
2109I asked Bernard how many planes Burandan Airways had. 'None,' he said.
2110
2111I told him not to be silly and use his eyes. 'No Minister, it belongs to
2112Freddie Laker,' he said. 'They chartered it last week and repainted it
2113specially.' Apparently most of the Have-Nots (I mean, LDCs) do this - at
2114the opening of the UN General Assembly the runways of Kennedy Airport are
2115jam-packed with phoney flag-carriers. 'In fact,' said Bernard with a sly
2116grin, 'there was one 747 that belonged to nine different African airlines
2117in a month. They called it the mumbo-jumbo.'
2118
2119While we watched nothing much happening on the TV except the mumbo-jumbo
2120taxiing around Prestwick and the Queen looking a bit chilly, Bernard gave
2121me the next day's schedule and explained that I was booked on the night
2122sleeper from King's Cross to Edinburgh because I had to vote in a
2123three-line whip at the House tonight and would have to miss the last
2124plane. Then the commentator, in that special hushed BBC voice used for any
2125occasion with which Royalty is connected, announced reverentially that we
2126were about to catch our first glimpse of President Selim.
2127
2128And out of the plane stepped Charlie. My old friend Charlie Umtali. We
2129were at LSE together. Not Selim Mohammed at all, but Charlie.
2130
2131Bernard asked me if I were sure. Silly question. How could you forget a
2132name like Charlie Umtali?
2133
2134I sent Bernard for Sir Humphrey, who was delighted to hear that we now
2135know something about our official visitor.
2136
2137Bernard's official brief said nothing. Amazing! Amazing how little the FCO
2138has been able to find out. Perhaps they were hoping it would all be on the
2139car radio. All the brief says is that Colonel Selim Mohammed had converted
2140to Islam some years ago, they didn't know his original name, and therefore
2141knew little of his background.
2142
2143I was able to tell Humphrey and Bernard /all/ about his background.
2144Charlie was a red-hot political economist, I informed them. Got the top
2145first. Wiped the floor with everyone.
2146
2147Bernard seemed relieved. 'Well that's all right then.'
2148
2149'Why?' I enquired.
2150
2151'I think Bernard means,' said Sir Humphrey helpfully, 'that he'll know how
2152to behave if he was at an English University. Even if it was the LSE.' I
2153never know whether or not Humphrey is insulting me intentionally.
2154
2155Humphrey was concerned about Charlie's political colour. 'When you said
2156that he was red-hot, were you speaking politically?'
2157
2158In a way I was. 'The thing about Charlie is that you never quite know
2159where you are with him. He's the sort of chap who follows you into a
2160revolving door and comes out in front.'
2161
2162'No deeply held convictions?' asked Sir Humphrey.
2163
2164'No. The only thing Charlie was committed too was Charlie.'
2165
2166'Ah, I see. A politician, Minister.'
2167
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2168=head2 v5.8.8 - Joe Raposo, "Bein' Green"
2169
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2170L<Announced on 2006-02-01 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/28caf52e41ebe723>
2171
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2172 It's not that easy bein' green
2173 Having to spend each day the color of the leaves
4363636d 2174 When I think it could be nicer being red or yellow or gold
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2175 Or something much more colorful like that
2176
2177 It's not easy bein' green
4363636d 2178 It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things
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2179 And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're
2180 Not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water
2181 Or stars in the sky
2182
2183 But green's the color of Spring
2184 And green can be cool and friendly-like
2185 And green can be big like an ocean
2186 Or important like a mountain
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2187 Or tall like a tree
2188
2189 When green is all there is to be
2190 It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why?
2191 Wonder I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful
2192 And I think it's what I want to be
2193
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2194=head2 v5.8.8-RC1 - Cosgrove Hall Productions, "Dangermouse"
2195
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2196L<Announced on 2006-01-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/d231fc554af8cc51>
2197
2198Greenback: And the world is mine, all mine. Muhahahahaha. See to it!
51caa79e 2199
2831a86c 2200Stiletto: Si, Barone. Subito, Barone.
4363636d 2201
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2202=head2 v5.8.7 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
2203
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2204L<Announced on 2005-05-31 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9a545704a0062f16>
2205
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2206And now, imagine the triumphant procession: Peter at the head; after him the
2207hunters leading the wolf; and winding up the procession, grandfather and the
2208cat.
2209
2210Grandfather shook his head discontentedly: "Well, and if Peter hadn't caught
51caa79e 2211the wolf? What then?"
4363636d 2212
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2213=head2 v5.8.7-RC1 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
2214
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2215L<Announced on 2005-05-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/05/msg100711.html>
2216
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2217And now this is how things stood: The cat was sitting on one branch. The
2218bird on another, not too close to the cat. And the wolf walked round and
2219round the tree, looking at them with greedy eyes.
2220
2221In the meantime, Peter, without the slightest fear, stood behind the
2222gate, watching all that was going on. He ran home,got a strong rope and
2223climbed up the high stone wall.
2224
2225One of the branches of the tree, around which the wolf was walking,
2226stretched out over the wall.
2227
2228Grabbing hold of the branch, Peter lightly climbed over on to the tree.
2229Peter said to the bird: "Fly down and circle round the wolf's head, only
2230take care that he doesn't catch you!".
2231
2232The bird almost touched the wolf's head with its wings, while the wolf
2233snapped angrily at him from this side and that.
2234
2235How that bird teased the wolf, how that wolf wanted to catch him! But
51caa79e 2236the bird was clever and the wolf simply couldn't do anything about it.
4363636d 2237
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2238=head2 v5.8.6 - A. A. Milne, "The House at Pooh Corner"
2239
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2240L<Announced on 2004-11-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20041128000836.GA304@Bagpuss.unfortu.net>
2241
4363636d 2242"Hallo, Pooh," said Piglet, giving a jump of surprise. "I knew it was
51caa79e 2243you."
4363636d 2244
51caa79e 2245"So did I,", said Pooh. "What are you doing?"
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2246
2247"I'm planting a haycorn, Pooh, so that it can grow up into an oak-tree,
2248and have lots of haycorns just outside the front door instead of having
51caa79e 2249to walk miles and miles, do you see, Pooh?"
4363636d 2250
51caa79e 2251"Supposing it doesn't?" said Pooh.
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2252
2253"It will, because Christopher Robin says it will, so that's why I'm
2254planting it."
2255
2256"Well," aid Pooh, "if I plant a honeycomb outside my house, then it will
51caa79e 2257grow up into a beehive."
4363636d 2258
51caa79e 2259Piglet wasn't quite sure about this.
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2260
2261"Or a /piece/ of a honeycomb," said Pooh, "so as not to waste too much.
2262Only then I might only get a piece of a beehive, and it might be the
51caa79e 2263wrong piece, where the bees were buzzing and not hunnying. Bother"
4363636d 2264
51caa79e 2265Piglet agreed that that would be rather bothering.
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DG
2266
2267"Besides, Pooh, it's a very difficult thing, planting unless you know
2268how to do it," he said; and he put the acorn in the hole he had made,
51caa79e 2269and covered it up with earth, and jumped on it.
4363636d 2270
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2271=head2 v5.8.6-RC1 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie the Pooh"
2272
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2273L<Announced on 2004-11-11 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/11/msg95786.html>
2274
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2275"Hallo!" said Piglet, "whare are /you/ doing?"
2276
2277"Hunting," said Pooh.
2278
2279"Hunting what?"
2280
2281"Tracking something," said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously.
2282
2283"Tracking what?" said Piglet, coming closer.
2284
2285"That's just what I ask myself, I ask myself, What?"
2286
2287"What do you think you'll answer?"
2288
2289"I shall have to wait until I catch up with it," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
2290"Now, look there." He pointed to the ground in front of him. "What do
2291you see there?"
2292
2293"Track," said Piglet. "Paw-marks." He gave a little squeak of
2294excitement. "Oh, Pooh!" Do you think it's a--a--a Woozle?"
2295
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2296=head2 v5.8.5 - wikipedia, "Yew"
2297
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2298L<Announced on 2004-07-19 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/68340e2e4c39222c>
2299
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2300Yews are relatively slow growing trees, widely used in landscaping and
2301ornamental horticulture. They have flat, dark-green needles, reddish
2302bark, and bear seeds with red arils, which are eaten by thrushes,
2303waxwings and other birds, dispersing the hard seeds undamaged in their
2304droppings. Yew wood is reddish brown (with white sapwood), and very
2305hard. It was traditionally used to make bows, especially the English
2306longbow.
2307
2308In England, the Common Yew (Taxus baccata, also known as English Yew) is
2309often found in churchyards. It is sometimes suggested that these are
2310placed there as a symbol of long life or trees of death, and some are
2311likely to be over 3,000 years old. It is also suggested that yew trees
2312may have a pre-Christian association with old pagan holy sites, and the
2313Christian church found it expedient to use and take over existing sites.
2314Another explanation is that the poisonous berries and foliage discourage
2315farmers and drovers from letting their animals wander into the burial
2316grounds. The yew tree is a frequent symbol in the Christian poetry of
51caa79e 2317T.S. Eliot, especially his Four Quartets.
4363636d 2318
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2319=head2 v5.8.5-RC2 - wikipedia, "Beech"
2320
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2321L<Announced on 2004-07-09 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/f92175725af7a5ad>
2322
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2323Beeches are trees of the Genus Fagus, family Fagaceae, including about
2324ten species in Europe, Asia, and North America. The leaves are entire or
2325sparsely toothed. The fruit is a small, sharply-angled nut, borne in
2326pairs in spiny husks. The beech most commonly grown as an ornamental or
2327shade tree is the European beech (Fagus sylvatica).
2328
2329The southern beeches belong to a different but related genus,
2330Nothofagus. They are found in Australia, New Zealand, New Guinea, New
51caa79e 2331Caledonia and South America.
4363636d 2332
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2333=head2 v5.8.5-RC1 - wikipedia, "Pedunculate Oak" (abridged)
2334
38183302 2335L<Announced on 2004-07-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/ca6ce4a7ed9f219c?pli=1>
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2337The Pedunculate Oak is called the Common Oak in Britain, and is also
2338often called the English Oak in other English speaking countries It is a
2339large deciduous tree to 25-35m tall (exceptionally to 40m), with lobed
2340and sessile (stalk-less) leaves. Flowering takes place in early to mid
2341spring, and their fruit, called "acorns", ripen by autumn of the same
2342year. The acorns are pedunculate (having a peduncle or acorn-stalk) and
2343may occur singly, or several acorns may occur on a stalk.
2344
2345It forms a long-lived tree, with a large widespreading head of rugged
2346branches. While it may naturally live to an age of a few centuries, many
2347of the oldest trees are pollarded or coppiced, both pruning techniques
2348that extend the tree's potential lifespan, if not its health.
2349
2350Within its native range it is valued for its importance to insects and
2351other wildlife. Numerous insects live on the leaves, buds, and in the
2352acorns. The acorns form a valuable food resource for several small
2353mammals and some birds, notably Jays Garrulus glandarius.
2354
2355It is planted for forestry, and produces a long-lasting and durable
51caa79e 2356heartwood, much in demand for interior and furniture work.
4363636d 2357
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2358=head2 v5.8.4 - T. S. Eliot, "The Old Gumbie Cat"
2359
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2360L<Announced on 2004-04-22 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/c7333acf03ef4015>
2361
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2362 I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots;
2363 The curtain-cord she likes to wind, and tie it into sailor-knots.
2364 She sits upon the window-sill, or anything that's smooth and flat:
2365 She sits and sits and sits and sits -- and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat!
2366
2367 But when the day's hustle and bustle is done,
2368 Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun.
2369 She thinks that the cockroaches just need employment
2370 To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment.
2371 So she's formed, from that a lot of disorderly louts,
2372 A troop of well-disciplined helpful boy-scouts,
2373 With a purpose in life and a good deed to do--
2374 And she's even created a Beetles' Tattoo.
2375
4363636d
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2376 So for Old Gumbie Cats let us now give three cheers --
2377 On whom well-ordered households depend, it appears.
2378
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2379
2380=head2 v5.8.4-RC2 - T. S. Eliot, "Macavity: The Mystery Cat"
2381
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2382L<Announced on 2004-04-16 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/84f6fdd73cc56a1b>
2383
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2384 Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw --
2385 For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
2386 He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
2387 For when they reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
2388
2389 Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
2390 He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
2391 His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
2392 And when you reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
2393 You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air --
2394 But I tell you once and once again, /Macavity's not there/!
2395
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2396=head2 v5.8.4-RC1 - T. S. Eliot, "Skimbleshanks: The Railway Cat"
2397
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2398L<Announced on 2004-04-05 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e500353440769ebf>
2399
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2400 There's a whisper down the line at 11.39
2401 When the Night Mail's ready to depart,
2402 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble has he gone to hunt the thimble?
2403 We must find him of the train can't start.'
2404 All the guards and all the porters and the stationmaster's daughters
2405 They are searching high and low,
2406 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble for unless he's very nimble
2407 Then the Night Mail just can't go'
2408 At 11.42 then the signal's overdue
2409 And the passengers are frantic to a man--
2410 Then Skimble will appear and he'll saunter to the rear:
2411 He's been busy in the luggage van!
2412 He gives one flash of his glass-green eyes
c5fb089a 2413 And the signal goes 'All Clear!'
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2414 And we're off at last of the northern part
2415 Of the Northern Hemisphere!
2416
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2417=head2 v5.8.3 - Arthur William Edgar O'Shaugnessy, "Ode"
2418
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2419L<Announced on 2004-01-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/968fb8d71e23af69>
2420
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2421 We are the music makers,
2422 And we are the dreamers of dreams,
2423 Wandering by lonely sea-breakers,
2424 And sitting by desolate streams; --
2425 World-losers and world-forsakers,
2426 On whom the pale moon gleams:
2427 Yet we are the movers and shakers
2428 Of the world for ever, it seems.
4363636d 2429
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2430=head2 v5.8.3-RC1 - Irving Berlin, "Let's Face the Music and Dance"
2431
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2432L<Announced on 2004-01-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/5ced50bebcd11c96>
2433
4363636d
DG
2434 There may be trouble ahead,
2435 But while there's music and moonlight,
2436 And love and romance,
2437 Let's face the music and dance.
2438
2439 Before the fiddlers have fled,
2440 Before they ask us to pay the bill,
2441 And while we still have that chance,
2442 Let's face the music and dance.
2443
2444 Soon, we'll be without the moon,
2445 Humming a different tune, and then,
2446
2447 There may be teardrops to shed,
2448 So while there's music and moonlight,
2449 And love and romance,
2450 Let's face the music and dance.
2451
4363636d
DG
2452=head2 v5.8.2 - Walt Whitman, "Passage to India"
2453
2831a86c
ZA
2454L<Announced on 2003-11-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/4714574f93967673>
2455
4363636d
DG
2456 Passage, immediate passage! the blood burns in my veins!
2457 Away O soul! hoist instantly the anchor!
2458 Cut the hawsers - hall out - shake out every sail!
2459 Have we not stood here like trees in the ground long enough?
2460 Have we not grovel'd here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes?
2461 Have we not darken'd and dazed ourselves with books long enough?
2462
4363636d
DG
2463 Sail forth - steer for the deep waters only,
2464 Reckless O soul, exploring, I with the and thou with me,
2465 For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go,
2466 And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all.
2467
2468 O my brave soul!
2469 O farther farther sail!
2470 O daring job, but safe! are they not all the seas of God?
2471 O farther, farther, farther sail!
2472
4363636d
DG
2473=head2 v5.8.2-RC2 - Eric Idle/John Du Prez, "Accountancy Shanty"
2474
2831a86c
ZA
2475L<Announced on 2003-11-03 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/7669de5804b792f6>
2476
4363636d
DG
2477 It's fun to charter an accountant
2478 And sail the wide accountan-cy,
2479 To find, explore the funds offshore
2480 And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy.
2481
4363636d
DG
2482=head2 v5.8.2-RC1 - Edward Lear, "The Jumblies"
2483
2831a86c
ZA
2484L<Announced on 2003-10-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83680ef3bbf7378d>
2485
4363636d
DG
2486 They went to sea in a Sieve, they did,
2487 In a Sieve they went to sea:
2488 In spite of all their friends could say,
2489 On a winter's morn, on a stormy day,
2490 In a Sieve they went to sea!
2491 And when the Sieve turned round and round,
2492 And everyone cried, "You'll all be drowned!"
2493 They cried aloud, "Our Sieve ain't big,
2494 But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig!
2495 In a Sieve we'll go to sea!"
2496
2497 Far and few, far and few,
2498 Are the lands where the Jumblies live;
2499 Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
2500 And they went to sea in a Sieve.
2501
2831a86c
ZA
2502=head2 v5.8.1 - epigraph same as v5.7.1
2503
2504L<Announced on 2003-09-25 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82678.html>
2505
2506=head2 v5.8.1-RC5 - Terry Pratchett, "Lords and Ladies"
2507
2508L<Announced on 2003-09-22 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82476.html>
2509
2510No matter what she did with her hair it took about
2511three minutes for it to tangle itself up again,
2512like a garden hosepipe in a shed [Footnote: Which,
2513no matter how carefully coiled, will always uncoil
2514overnight and tie the lawnmower to the bicycles].
2515
2516=head2 v5.8.1-RC4 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
2517
2518L<Announced on 2003-08-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/08/msg79184.html>
2519
2520Grand Viziers were /always/ scheming megalomaniacs.
2521It was probably in the job description: "Are you a
2522devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good,
2523then you can be my most trusted minister."
2524
2525=head2 v5.8.1-RC3 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
2526
2527L<Announced on 2003-07-30 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg79048.html>
2528
2529Lord Hong had a mind like a knife, although possibly
2530a knife with a curved blade.
2531
2532=head2 v5.8.1-RC2 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
2533
2534L<Announced on 2003-07-11 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78102.html>
2535
2536Many an ancient lord's last words had been, "You can't kill
2537me because I've got magic aaargh."
2538
2539=head2 v5.8.1-RC1 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
2540
2541L<Announced on 2003-07-10 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78009.html>
2542
2543Cohen was familiar with city gates. He'd broken down a number
2544in his time, by battering ram, siege gun, and on one occasion
2545with his head.
2546
2547But the gates of Hunghung were pretty damn good gates. They
2548weren't like the gates of Ankh-Morpork, which were usually wide
2549open to attract the spending customer and whose concession to
2550defense was the sign "Thank You For Not Attacking Our City.
2551Bonum Diem." These things were big and made of metal and there
2552was a guardhouse and a squad of unhelpful men in black armor.
2553
2831a86c
ZA
2554=head2 v5.8.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
2555
2556L<Announced on 2002-07-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63720.html>
2557
2558There was the faint sound of footsteps.
2559"Chap with a whip got as far as the big sharp spikes last week,"
2560said the low priest.
2561There was a sound like the flushing of a very old dry lavatory.
2562The footsteps stopped. The High Priest smiled to himself.
2563"Right," he said. "See your two pebbles and raise you two pebbles."
2564The low priest threw down his cards. "Double Onion," he said.
2565The High Priest looked down suspiciously.
2566The low priest consulted a scrap of paper. "That's three hundred
2567thousand, nine hundred and sixty-four pebbles you owe me," he said.
2568There was the sound of footsteps. The priests exchanged glances.
2569"Haven't had one for poisoned-dart alley for quite some time,"
2570said the High Priest.
2571"Five says he makes it", said the low priest. "You're on."
2572There was a faint clatter of metal points on stone.
2573"It's a shame to take your pebbles."
2574There were footsteps again.
2575
2576=head2 v5.8.0-RC3 - no epigraph
2577
2578L<Announced on 2002-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63234.html>
2579
2580=head2 v5.8.0-RC2 - no epigraph
2581
2582L<Announced on 2002-06-21 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg62013.html>
2583
2584=head2 v5.8.0-RC1 - no epigraph
2585
2586L<Announced on 2002-06-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg60317.html>
2587
2588=head2 v5.7.3 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
2589
2590L<Announced on 2002-03-04 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/03/msg53652.html>
2591
2592Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong.
2593No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always
2594got there first, and is waiting for it.
2595
2596=head2 v5.7.2 - Terry Pratchett, "Small Gods"
2597
2598L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/07/msg40370.html>
2599
2600His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools --
2601the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans -- and summed up
2602all three of them in his famous phrase, "You can't trust any
2603bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing
2604you can do about it, so let's have a drink."
2605
2606=head2 v5.7.1 - Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic"
2607
2608L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33851.html>
4363636d 2609
4363636d
DG
2610"What happens next?" asked Twoflower.
2611
2612Hrun screwed a finger in his ear and inspected it absently.
2613
2614"Oh,", he said, "I expect in a minute the door will be
2615flung back and I'll be dragged off to some sort of temple
2616arena where I'll fight maybe a couple of giant spiders
2617and an eight-foot slave from the jungles of Klatch and then
2618I'll rescue some kind of a princess from the altar and then
2619I'll kill off a few guards or whatever and then this girl
2620will show me the secret passage out of the place and we'll
2621liberate a couple of horses and escape with the treasure."
2622Hrun leaned his head back on his hands and looked at the
2623ceiling, whistling tunelessly.
2624
2625"All that?" said Twoflower.
2626
2627"Usually."
2628
c7bed260
Z
2629=head2 v5.7.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Moving Pictures"
2630
2631L<Announced on 2000-09-02 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/09/msg17730.html>
2632
2633The Librarian had seen many weird things in his time,
2634but that had to be the 57th strangest.
2635[footnote: he had a tidy mind]
2636
2637=head2 v5.6.2 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
2638
2639L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/deb8cb9ad918716f>
2640
2641When great or unexpected events fall out upon the stage of this
2642sublunary word--the mind of man, which is an inquisitive kind of
2643a substance, naturally takes a flight, behind the scenes, to see
2644what is the cause and first spring of them--The search was not
2645long in this instance.
2646
2647=head2 v5.6.2-RC1 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
2648
2649L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e3d4acc7a8dd3ce5>
2650
2651"Pray, my dear", quoth my mother, "have you not forgot to wind up the clock?"
2652
2831a86c 2653=head2 v5.6.1 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", Riddles in the Dark
4363636d 2654
2831a86c 2655L<Announced on 2001-04-08 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33823.html>
4363636d 2656
2831a86c
ZA
2657`What have I got in my pocket?' he said aloud. He was talking to
2658himself, but Gollum thought it was a riddle, and he was frightfully
2659upset.
4363636d 2660
2831a86c
ZA
2661`Not fair! not fair!' he hissed. `It isn't fair, my precious, is it,
2662to ask us what it's got in its nassty little pocketses?'
4363636d 2663
2831a86c
ZA
2664Bilbo seeing what had happened and having nothing better to ask
2665stuck to his question, `What have I got in my pocket?' he said
2666louder.
4363636d 2667
2831a86c
ZA
2668`S-s-s-s-s,' hissed Gollum. `It must give us three guesseses,
2669my precious, three guesseses.'
4363636d 2670
2831a86c 2671=head2 v5.6.1-foolish - no epigraph
4363636d 2672
2831a86c 2673L<Announced on 2001-08-04 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33421.html>
3e340399 2674
2831a86c 2675=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL3 - I can't find the announcement
4363636d 2676
a4b0381d
MS
2677No announcement available.
2678
2831a86c 2679=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL2 - no epigraph
4363636d 2680
2831a86c 2681L<Announced on 2001-01-31 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/01/msg29934.html>
4363636d 2682
2831a86c 2683=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL1 - no epigraph
4363636d 2684
2831a86c 2685L<Announced on 2000-12-18 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/12/msg27738.html>
4363636d 2686
2831a86c 2687=head2 v5.6.0 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", The Last Stage
a4b0381d 2688
2831a86c
ZA
2689L<Announced on 2000-03-23 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10341.html>
2690
2691 The dragon is withered,
2692 His bones are now crumbled;
2693 His armour is shivered,
2694 His splendour is humbled!
2695 Though sword shall be rusted,
2696 And throne and crown perish
2697 With strength that men trusted
2698 And wealth that they cherish,
2699 Here grass is still growing,
2700 And leaves are a yet swinging,
2701 The white water flowing,
2702 And elves are yet singing
2703 Come! Tra-la-la-lally!
2704 Come back to the valley.
2705
2831a86c
ZA
2706=head2 v5.6.0-RC3 - no epigraph
2707
2708L<Announced on 2000-03-22 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10140.html>
4363636d 2709
c7bed260
Z
2710=head2 v5.005_05-RC1 - no epigraph
2711
2712L<Announced on 2009-02-16 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/02/msg144227.html>
2713
2714=head2 v5.005_04 - no epigraph
2715
2716L<Announced on 2004-03-01 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6c240ad0b189cb47>
2717
2718=head2 v5.005_04-RC2 - Rudyard Kipling, "The Jungle Book"
2719
2720L<Announced on 2004-02-19 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83e5421124a7b49d>
2721
2722The monkeys called the place their city, and pretended to despise
2723the Jungle-People because they lived in the forest. And yet they
2724never knew what the buildings were made for nor how to use
2725them. They would sit in circles on the hall of the king's council
2726chamber, and scratch for fleas and pretend to be men; or they would
2727run in and out of the roofless houses and collect pieces of plaster
2728and old bricks in a corner, and forget where they had hidden them,
2729and fight and cry in scuffling crowds, and then break off to play up
2730and down the terraces of the king's garden, where they would shake
2731the rose trees and the oranges in sport to see the fruit and flowers
2732fall.
2733
2734=head2 v5.005_04-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
2735
2736L<Announced on 2004-02-05 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6aaeb6ec699bd116>
2737
2738Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had
2739plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to wonder what was
2740going to happen next. First, she tried to look down and make out what
2741she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything; then she looked
2742at the sides of the well, and noticed that they were filled with
2743cupboards and book-shelves; here and there she saw maps and pictures
2744hung upon pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves as she
2745passed; it was labelled 'ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great
2746disappointment it was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear
2747of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as
2748she fell past it.
2749
2750=head2 v1.0_16 - Johan Vromans, extemporarily
2751
2752L<Announced on 2003-12-18 by Richard Clamp|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9281dc6194d15940>
2753
4363636d
DG
2754=head1 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
2755
0e6b8110 2756This document was originally compiled based on a list of epigraphs
4363636d
DG
2757on L<Perl Monks|http://perlmonks.org> titled
2758L<Recent Perl Release Announcement|http://perlmonks.org/?node_id=372406>
2759by ysth.
2760
2761=cut
3e340399 2762
4363636d 2763# vim:tw=72: