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f1e17f6f AB |
1 | =encoding utf8 |
2 | ||
4363636d DG |
3 | =head1 NAME |
4 | ||
0e6b8110 | 5 | perlepigraphs - list of Perl release epigraphs |
4363636d DG |
6 | |
7 | =head1 DESCRIPTION | |
8 | ||
0e6b8110 | 9 | Many Perl release announcements included an I<epigraph>, a short excerpt |
2831a86c ZA |
10 | from a literary or other creative work, chosen by the pumpking or release |
11 | manager. This file assembles the known list of epigraph for posterity, | |
12 | and also links to the release announcements in mailing list archives. | |
4363636d | 13 | |
0e6b8110 DG |
14 | I<Note>: these have also been referred to as <epigrams>, but the |
15 | definition of I<epigraph> is closer to the way they have been used. | |
16 | Consult your favorite dictionary for details. | |
17 | ||
18 | =head1 EPIGRAPHS | |
4363636d | 19 | |
d7846122 TC |
20 | =head2 v5.17.2 - Terry Pratchet, "The Colour of Magic" |
21 | ||
22 | L<Announced on 2012-06-21 by TonyC|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/07/msg189828.html> | |
23 | ||
24 | ‘I knew it,’ said Rincewind. ‘We're in a strong magical field.’ | |
25 | ||
26 | Twoflower and Hrun looked around the little hollow where they had made | |
27 | their noonday halt. Then they looked at each other. | |
28 | ||
29 | The horses were quietly cropping the rich grass by the stream. Yellow | |
30 | butterflies skittered among the bushes. There was a smell of thyme | |
31 | and a buzzing of bees. The wild pigs on the spit sizzled gently. | |
32 | ||
33 | Hrun shrugged and went back to oiling his biceps. They gleamed. | |
34 | ||
35 | ‘Looks alright to me,’ he said. | |
36 | ||
37 | ‘Try tossing a coin,’ said Rincewind. | |
38 | ||
39 | ‘What?’ | |
40 | ||
41 | ‘Go on. Toss a coin.’ | |
42 | ||
43 | ‘Hokay,’ said Hrun. 'If that gives you any pleasure.’ He reached into | |
44 | his pouch and withdrew a handful of loose change plundered from a | |
45 | dozen realms. With some care he selected a Zchloty leaden | |
46 | quarter-iotum and balanced it on a purple thumbnail. | |
47 | ||
48 | ‘You call,’ he said. ‘Heads or—’ he inspected the obverse with | |
49 | an air of intense concentration, ‘some sort of a fish with legs.’ | |
50 | ||
51 | ‘When it's in the air,’ said Rincewind. Hrun grinned and flicked his thumb. | |
52 | ||
53 | The iotum rose, spinning. | |
54 | ||
55 | ‘Edge,’ said Rincewind, without looking at it. | |
56 | ||
322e634c JL |
57 | =head2 v5.17.1 - Rand Miller, "Myst: The Book of Ti'ana" |
58 | ||
59 | L<Announced on 2012-06-20 by doy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/06/msg188354.html> | |
60 | ||
61 | On their return from Ko'ah, Aitrus had shown her the Book, patiently | |
62 | taking her through page after page, and showing her how such an Age was | |
63 | "made." She had seen at once the differences between this archaic form | |
64 | and the ordinary written speech of the D'ni, noting how it was not | |
65 | merely more elaborate but more specific: a language of precise yet | |
66 | subtle descriptive power. Yet seeing was one thing, believing another. | |
67 | Given all the evidence, her rational mind still fought against accepting | |
68 | it. | |
69 | ||
dd15390c Z |
70 | =head2 v5.17.0 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky" |
71 | ||
f51b9d59 | 72 | L<Announced on 2012-05-26 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/05/msg187214.html> |
dd15390c Z |
73 | |
74 | `Welcome, comrades!' Burya opened his arms toward the soldier. | |
75 | `Yes it is true! With help from our allies of the Festival, the iron | |
76 | hand of the reactionary junta is about to be overthrown for all time! | |
77 | The new economy is being born; the marginal cost of production has | |
78 | been abolished, and from now on, if any item is produced once, it can | |
79 | be replicated infinitely. From each according to his imagination, | |
80 | to each according to his needs! Join us or better still, bring your | |
81 | fellow soldiers and workers to join us!' | |
82 | ||
83 | There was a sharp bang from the roof of the Corn Exchange, right at the | |
84 | climax of his impromptu speech; heads turned in alarm. Something had | |
85 | broken inside the spork factory and a stream of rainbow-hued plastic | |
86 | implements fountained toward the sky and clattered to the cobblestones | |
87 | on every side, like a harbinger of the postindustrial society to come. | |
88 | Workers and peasants alike stared in open-mouthed bewilderment at this | |
89 | astounding display of productivity, then bent to scrabble in the muck | |
90 | for the brightly colored sporks of revolution. A volley of shots rang | |
91 | out and Burya Rubenstein raised his hands, grinning wildly, to accept | |
92 | the salute of the soldiers from the Skull Hill garrison. | |
93 | ||
a210cc89 RS |
94 | =head2 v5.16.1 - Emerald Rose - Never Split The Party |
95 | ||
96 | L<Announced on 2012-08-08 by Ricardo | |
97 | Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-08/msg00307.html> | |
98 | ||
99 | Don't you know? You never split the party | |
100 | Clerics in the back to keep those fighters hale and hearty | |
101 | The wizard in the middle, where he can shed some light | |
102 | And you never let that damn thief out of sight… | |
103 | ||
104 | -- Emerald Rose, Never Split The Party | |
105 | ||
106 | =head2 v5.16.1 RC1 - Tom Moldvay - Dungeons & Dragons | |
107 | ||
108 | L<Announced on 2012-08-03 by Ricardo | |
109 | Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-08/msg00157.html> | |
110 | ||
111 | I was busy rescuing the captured maiden when the dragon showed up. | |
112 | Fifty feed of scaled terror glared down at us with smoldering red eyes. | |
113 | Tendrils of smoke drifted out from between fangs larger than daggers. | |
114 | The dragon blocked the only exit from the cave. | |
115 | ||
116 | ⋮ | |
117 | ||
118 | I unwrapped the sword which the mysterious cleric had given me. The | |
119 | sword was golden-tinted steel. Its hilt was set with a rainbow | |
120 | collection of precious gems. I shouted my battle cry and charged | |
121 | ||
122 | My charge caught the dragon by surprise. Its titanic jaws snapped shut | |
123 | inches from my face. I swung the golden sword with both arms. The | |
124 | swordblade bit into the dragon's neck and continued through to the other | |
125 | side. With an earth-shaking crash, the dragon dropped dead at my feet. | |
126 | The magic sword had saved my life and ended the reign of the | |
127 | dragon-tyrant. The countryside was freed and I could return as a hero. | |
128 | ||
129 | -- Tom Moldvay, Foreward to the Dungeons & Dragons Basic Rulebook | |
130 | ||
4c4c16b2 RS |
131 | =head2 v5.16.0 - W.H. Auden - September 1, 1939 |
132 | ||
133 | L<Announced on 2012-05-20 by Ricardo | |
134 | Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-05/msg00728.html> | |
135 | ||
a210cc89 RS |
136 | All I have is a voice |
137 | To undo the folded lie, | |
138 | The romantic lie in the brain | |
139 | Of the sensual man-in-the-street | |
140 | And the lie of Authority | |
141 | Whose buildings grope the sky: | |
142 | There is no such thing as the State | |
143 | And no one exists alone; | |
144 | Hunger allows no choice | |
145 | To the citizen or the police; | |
146 | We must love one another or die. | |
147 | ||
148 | -- W.H. Auden, September 1, 1939 | |
4c4c16b2 | 149 | |
54fdd2d6 A |
150 | =head2 v5.15.9 - Bob Dylan - Blowin' In The Wind |
151 | ||
a97faa3d A |
152 | L<Announced on 2012-03-20 by |
153 | Abigail|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/184824> | |
154 | ||
155 | How many roads must a man walk down | |
156 | Before you call him a man? | |
157 | Yes, 'n' how many seas must a white dove sail | |
158 | Before she sleeps in the sand? | |
159 | Yes, 'n' how many times must the cannonballs fly | |
160 | Before they're forever banned? | |
161 | The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind | |
162 | The answer is blowin' in the wind | |
163 | ||
164 | How many years can a mountain exist | |
165 | Before it's washed to the sea? | |
166 | Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist | |
167 | Before they're allowed to be free? | |
168 | Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head | |
169 | Pretending he just doesn't see? | |
170 | The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind | |
171 | The answer is blowin' in the wind | |
172 | ||
173 | How many times must a man look up | |
174 | Before he can see the sky? | |
175 | Yes, 'n' how many ears must one man have | |
176 | Before he can hear people cry? | |
177 | Yes, 'n' how many deaths will it take till he knows | |
178 | That too many people have died? | |
179 | The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind | |
180 | The answer is blowin' in the wind | |
54fdd2d6 A |
181 | |
182 | -- Bob Dylan, Spring 1962 | |
183 | ||
1f9d7ff5 MM |
184 | =head2 v5.15.8 - The KLF - The Manual-How To Have A Number One The Easy Way |
185 | ||
186 | L<Announced on 2012-02-20 by Max | |
187 | Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/02/msg183919.html> | |
188 | ||
189 | "Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who | |
190 | Doctor Who, in the Tardis | |
191 | Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who | |
192 | Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who | |
193 | Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who" | |
194 | ||
195 | Gibberish of course, but every lad in the country under a certain | |
196 | age related instinctively to what it was about. The ones slightly | |
197 | older needed a couple of pints inside them to clear away the mind | |
198 | debris left by the passing years before it made sense. As for | |
199 | girls and our chorus, we think they must have seen it as pure crap. | |
200 | A fact that must have limited to zero our chances of staying at The | |
201 | Top for more than one week. | |
202 | ||
203 | Stock, Aitkin and Waterman, however, are kings of writing chorus | |
204 | lyrics that go straight to the emotional heart of the 7" single | |
205 | buying girls in this country. Their most successful records will kick | |
206 | into the chorus with a line which encapsulates the entire emotional | |
207 | meaning of the song. This will obviously be used as the title. As | |
208 | soon as Rick Astley hit the first line of the chorus on his debut | |
209 | single it was all over - the Number One position was guaranteed: | |
210 | ||
211 | "I'm never going to give you up" | |
212 | ||
cf6bc744 CBW |
213 | =head2 v5.15.7 - Penelope Lively, The Voyage of QV66 |
214 | ||
215 | L<Announced on 2012-01-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams | |
216 | |http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/01/msg182230.html> | |
217 | ||
218 | "Laboratories," announced Henry. "Kindly don't touch anything." | |
219 | ||
220 | He led us into a long low brick shed. Outside there was a | |
221 | notice on a piece of board, crudely printed in red paint, | |
222 | which said GRATE SIENCE DISCOVERYS DONE HERE SSSH! BRING YOUR | |
223 | OWN BUKKIT NO PINCHING ANYWUN ELSE'S EXPERRYMENTS CANTEEN OPEN | |
224 | ALL DAY CHIMPS ONLY. | |
225 | ||
226 | There were a lot of large black monkeys inside, all intently | |
227 | busy on what they were doing. Some of them were pouring stuff | |
228 | out of bottles into buckets and carefully stirring the ensuing | |
229 | mixture; others were at work with glass tubes and jars, blowing | |
230 | and measuring and mixing; others were crouched over long benches | |
231 | with tools and heaps of bits and pieces of metal, cutting and | |
232 | bending and constructing. There was a great deal of noise and | |
233 | chatter. Every now and then one of them would give a whoop of | |
234 | excitement and all the others would gather round and jump up and | |
235 | down cheering and applauding. | |
236 | ||
237 | "Chimps," said Henry. "They're awfully clever." | |
238 | ||
b0d358f0 DR |
239 | =head2 v5.15.6 - Ursula K. Leguin, A Wizard of Earthsea |
240 | ||
489db6ed DR |
241 | L<Announced on 2011-12-20 by Dave |
242 | Rolsky|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/12/msg180962.html> | |
b0d358f0 DR |
243 | |
244 | Ged had thought that as the prentice of a great mage he would enter at once | |
245 | into the mystery and mastery of power. He would understand the language of the | |
246 | beasts and the speech of the leaves of the forest, he thought, and sway the | |
247 | winds with his word, and learn to change himself into any shape he | |
248 | wished. Maybe he and his master would run together as stags, or fly to Re Albi | |
249 | over the mountain on the wings of eagles. | |
250 | ||
251 | But it was not so at all. They wandered, first down into the Vale and then | |
252 | gradually south and westward around the mountain, given lodging in little | |
253 | villages or spending the night out in the wilderness, like poor | |
254 | journeyman-sorcerers, or tinkers, or beggars. They entered no mysterious | |
255 | domain. Nothing happened. The mage's oaken staff that Ged had watched at first | |
256 | with eager dread was nothing but a stout staff to walk with. Three days went | |
257 | by and four days went by and still Ogion had not spoken a single charm in | |
258 | Ged's hearing, and had not taught him a single name or rune or spell. | |
259 | ||
d0fc7727 SH |
260 | =head2 v5.15.5 - Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman |
261 | ||
262 | L<Announced on 2011-11-20 by Steve | |
263 | Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/11/msg179588.html> | |
264 | ||
265 | This day - is a day of the greatest solemnity! Spain has a king. He has | |
266 | been found. I am that king. Only this very day did I learn of it. I | |
267 | confess, it came to me suddenly in a flash of lightning. I don't understand | |
268 | how I could have thought and imagined that I was a titular councillor. How | |
269 | could such a wild notion enter my head? It's a good thing no one thought of | |
270 | putting me in an insane asylum. Now everything is laid open before me. Now | |
271 | I see everything as on the palm of my hand. And before, I don't understand, | |
272 | before everything around me was in some sort of fog. And all this happens, I | |
273 | think, because people imagine that the human brain is in the head. Not at | |
274 | all: it is brought by a wind from the direction of the Caspian Sea. First | |
275 | off, I announced to Mavra who I am. When she heard that the king of Spain | |
276 | was standing before her, she clasped her hands and nearly died of fright. | |
277 | The stupid woman had never seen a king of Spain before. However, I | |
278 | endeavoured to calm her down and assured her in gracious words of my | |
279 | benevolence and that I was not at all angry that she sometimes polished my | |
280 | boots poorly. They're benighted folk. It's impossible to tell them about | |
281 | lofty matters. She got frightened because she's convinced that all kings of | |
282 | Spain are like Philip II. But I explained to her that there was no | |
283 | resemblance between me and Philip II, and that I didn't have a single | |
284 | Capuchin . . . I didn't go to the office . . . To hell with it! No friends, | |
285 | you won't lure me there now; I'm not going to copy your vile papers! | |
286 | ||
287 | -- Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman, | |
288 | trans. Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky | |
289 | ||
1542e678 FR |
290 | =head2 v5.15.4 - Steve Jobs |
291 | ||
292 | L<Announced on 2011-10-20 by Florian | |
293 | Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/10/msg178412.html> | |
294 | ||
295 | A lot of people in our industry haven't had very diverse experiences. So they | |
296 | don't have enough dots to connect, and they end up with very linear solutions | |
297 | without a broad perspective on the problem. The broader one's understanding of | |
298 | the human experience, the better design we will have. | |
299 | ||
c684cf36 | 300 | =head2 v5.14.2 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >> |
21677d22 FR |
301 | |
302 | L<Announced on 2011-09-26 by Florian | |
303 | Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177618.html> | |
304 | ||
305 | ||
306 | It's not so much that people don't value the programs after they have them--they | |
307 | do value them. But they're not the sort of thing that would ever catch on if | |
308 | they had to overcome the marketing barrier. (I don't yet know if perl will | |
309 | catch on at all--I'm worried enough about it that I specifically included an | |
310 | awk-to-perl translator just to help it catch on.) Maybe it's all just an | |
311 | inferiority complex. Or maybe I don't like to be mercenary. | |
312 | ||
313 | So I guess I'd say that the reason some software comes free is that the | |
314 | mechanism for selling it is missing, either from the work environment, or from | |
315 | the heart of the programmer. | |
316 | ||
317 | ||
607b15aa SL |
318 | =head2 v5.15.3 - Oscar Wilde, All Art is Quite Useless |
319 | ||
ca420de3 SL |
320 | L<Announced on 2011-09-20 by Stevan |
321 | Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177427.html> | |
322 | ||
607b15aa SL |
323 | All art is at once surface and symbol. Those who go beneath |
324 | the surface do so at their peril. Those who read the symbol | |
325 | do so at their peril. | |
326 | ||
327 | It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors. | |
328 | Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the | |
329 | work is new, complex, and vital. When critics disagree, the | |
330 | artist is in accord with himself. | |
331 | ||
332 | We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as | |
333 | he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless | |
334 | thing is that one admires it intensely. | |
335 | ||
336 | All art is quite useless. | |
337 | ||
338 | -- Oscar Wilde, From the preface to The Picture of Dorian Gray | |
339 | ||
340 | ||
bfb65171 RS |
341 | =head2 v5.15.2 - Rainer Maria Rilke, The Third Duina Elegy |
342 | ||
343 | L<Announced on 2011-08-20 by Ricardo | |
344 | Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-08/msg00694.html> | |
345 | ||
346 | True, it is strange to live no more on earth, | |
347 | no longer follow the folkways scarecely learned; | |
348 | not to give roses and other especially auspicious | |
349 | things the significance of a human future; | |
350 | to be no more what one was in infinitely anxious hands, | |
351 | and to put aside even one's name, like a broken plaything. | |
352 | Strange, to wish wishes no longer. Strange, to see | |
353 | all that was related fluttering so loosely in space. | |
354 | And being dead is hard, full of catching-up, | |
355 | so that finally one feels a little eternity.– | |
356 | But the living all make the mistake of too sharp discrimination. | |
357 | Often angels (it's said) don't know if they move | |
358 | among the quick or the dead. The eternal current | |
359 | hurtles all ages along with it forever | |
360 | through both realms and drowns their voices in both. | |
361 | ||
362 | -- Rainer Maria Rilke, Duino, The First Elegy | |
363 | trans., C. F. MacIntyre | |
364 | ||
1889cb12 Z |
365 | =head2 v5.15.1 - Greg Egan, "Permutation City" |
366 | ||
2ccefb8a | 367 | L<Announced on 2011-07-20 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/07/msg175014.html> |
1889cb12 Z |
368 | |
369 | Carter held out a hand towards the middle of the room. `See that | |
370 | fountain?' A ten-metre-wide marble wedding cake, topped with a | |
371 | winged cherub wrestling a serpent, duly appeared. Water cascaded | |
372 | down from a gushing wound in the cherub's neck. Carter said, `It's | |
373 | being computed by redundancies in the sketch of the city. I can | |
374 | extract the results, because I know exactly where to look for them -- | |
375 | but nobody else would have a hope in hell of picking them out.' | |
376 | ||
377 | Peer walked up to the fountain. Even as he approached, he noticed | |
378 | that the spray was intangible; when he dipped his hand in the water | |
379 | around the base he felt nothing, and the motion he made with his | |
380 | fingers left the foaming surface unchanged. They were spying on | |
381 | the calculations, not interacting with them; the fountain was a | |
382 | closed system. | |
383 | ||
384 | Carter said, `In your case, of course, nobody will need to know | |
385 | the results. Except you -- and you'll know them because you'll | |
386 | /be/ them.' | |
387 | ||
452ead5e DG |
388 | =head2 v5.15.0 - Neil Gaiman, "The Graveyard Book" |
389 | ||
390 | L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173748.html> | |
391 | ||
392 | If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all | |
393 | you will have gained. | |
394 | ||
b3c5102d LB |
395 | =head2 v5.12.4 - William Schwenck Gilbert, "Trial By Jury" |
396 | ||
397 | L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173725.html> | |
398 | ||
399 | You cannot eat breakfast all day, | |
400 | Nor is it the act of a sinner, | |
401 | When breakfast is taken away, | |
402 | To turn his attention to dinner; | |
403 | And it's not in the range of belief, | |
404 | To look upon him as a glutton, | |
405 | Who, when he is tired of beef, | |
406 | Determines to tackle the mutton. | |
407 | Ah! But this I am willing to say, | |
408 | If it will appease her sorrow, | |
409 | I'll marry this lady today, | |
410 | And I'll marry the other tomorrow! | |
411 | ||
c684cf36 | 412 | =head2 v5.14.1 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >> |
901b3fdb LB |
413 | |
414 | L<Announced on 2011-06-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173650.html> | |
415 | ||
416 | At this point I'm no longer working for a company that makes me sign | |
417 | my life away, but by now I'm in the habit. Besides, I still harbor | |
418 | the deep-down suspicion that nobody would pay money for what I write, | |
419 | since most of it just helps you do something better that you could | |
420 | already do some other way. How much money would you personally pay | |
421 | to upgrade from readnews to rn? How much money would you pay for | |
422 | the patch program? As for warp, it's a mere game. And anything you | |
423 | can do with perl you can eventually do with an amazing and totally | |
424 | unreadable conglomeration of awk, sed, sh and C. | |
425 | ||
426 | =head2 v5.12.4-RC2 - James Russell Lowell, "Eleanor makes macaroons" | |
427 | ||
428 | L<Announced on 2011-06-15 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173609.html> | |
429 | ||
430 | Now for sugar, -- nay, our plan | |
431 | Tolerates no work of man. | |
432 | Hurry, then, ye golden bees; | |
433 | Fetch your clearest honey, please, | |
434 | Garnered on a Yorkshire moor, | |
435 | While the last larks sing and soar, | |
436 | From the heather-blossoms sweet | |
437 | Where sea-breeze and sunshine meet, | |
438 | And the Augusts mask as Junes, -- | |
439 | Eleanor makes macaroons! | |
440 | ||
7fdfa5b9 LB |
441 | =head2 v5.12.4-RC1 - Ogden Nash, "The Clean Plater" |
442 | ||
443 | L<Announced on 2011-06-08 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173352.html> | |
444 | ||
445 | Pheasant is pleasant, of course, | |
446 | And terrapin, too, is tasty, | |
447 | Lobster I freely endorse, | |
448 | In pate or patty or pasty. | |
449 | But there's nothing the matter with butter, | |
450 | And nothing the matter with jam, | |
451 | And the warmest greetings I utter | |
452 | To the ham and the yam and the clam. | |
453 | For they're food, | |
454 | All food, | |
455 | And I think very fondly of food. | |
456 | Through I'm broody at times | |
457 | When bothered by rhymes, | |
458 | I brood | |
459 | On food. | |
460 | ||
c684cf36 | 461 | =head2 v5.14.0 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >> |
8b55b028 ZA |
462 | |
463 | L<Announced on 2011-05-14 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172326.html> | |
464 | ||
465 | At the start of any project, I'm programming primarily to please | |
466 | myself. (The two chief virtues in a programmer are laziness and | |
467 | impatience.) After a while somebody looks over my shoulder and says, | |
468 | "That's neat. It'd be neater if it did such-and-so." So the thing | |
469 | gets neater. Pretty soon (a year or two) I have an rn, a warp, a patch, | |
470 | or a perl. One of these years I'll have a metaconfig. | |
471 | ||
472 | I then say to myself, "I don't want my life's work to die when this | |
473 | computer is scrapped, so I should let some other people use this. If I | |
474 | ask my company to sell this, it'll never see the light of day, and nobody | |
475 | would pay much for it anyway. If I sell it myself, I'll be in trouble with | |
476 | my company, to whom I signed my life away when I was hired. If I give it | |
477 | away, I can pretend it was worthless in the first place, so my company | |
478 | won't care. In any event, it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission." | |
479 | ||
480 | So a freely distributable program is born. | |
481 | ||
482 | =head2 v5.14.0-RC3 - American Airlines Gate Agent, last call | |
483 | ||
484 | L<Announced on 2011-05-11 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172282.html> | |
485 | ||
486 | This is the last call for flight 1697 with service to Chicago and | |
487 | continuing service to San Francisco. All passengers should already be | |
488 | aboard. If you aren't aboard at this time, you will be denied boarding | |
489 | and your bags will be offloaded. | |
490 | ||
491 | =head2 v5.14.0-RC2 - Greg Grandin, Fordlandia, "the Rise and Fall of Henry Ford's Forgotten Jungle City" | |
492 | ||
493 | L<Announced on 2011-05-04 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg171879.html> | |
494 | ||
495 | Over the course of nearly two decades, Ford would spend tens of millions | |
496 | of dollars founding not one but, after the plantation was defastated | |
497 | by leaf blight, two American towns, complete with central squares, | |
498 | sidewalks, indoor plumbing, hospitals, manicured lawns, movie theaters, | |
499 | swimming pools, golf courses, and, of course, Model Ts and As rolling | |
500 | down their paved streets. | |
501 | ||
502 | Back in America, newspapers kept up their drumbeat celebration, only | |
503 | obliquely referencing reports that things were not progressing as the | |
504 | company had hoped. But there was one note of skepticism. In late 1928, | |
505 | the Washington Post ran an editorial that read in its entirety: "Ford will | |
506 | govern a rubber plantation in Brazil larger than North Carolina. This is | |
507 | the first time he has applied quantity production methods to trouble" | |
508 | ||
509 | =head2 v5.14.0-RC1 - Bill Bryson, "In a Sunburned Country" | |
510 | ||
511 | L<Announced on 2011-04-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/04/msg171253.html> | |
512 | ||
513 | But then Australia is such a difficult country to keep track of. On | |
514 | my first visit, some years ago, I passed the time on the long flight | |
515 | reading a history of Australian politics in the twentieth century, | |
516 | wherein I encountered the startling fact that in 1967 the prime minister, | |
517 | Harold Holt, was strolling along a beach in Victoria when he plunged into | |
518 | the surf and vanished. No trace of the poor man was ever seen again. | |
519 | This seemed doubly astounding to meE<0x2014>first that Australia could | |
520 | just I<lose> a prime minister (I mean, come on) and second that news of | |
521 | this had never reached me. | |
522 | ||
04496198 FR |
523 | =head2 v5.13.11 - Walt Whitman, L<Leaves of Grass|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leaves_of_Grass> |
524 | ||
525 | L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-03/msg00560.html> | |
526 | ||
527 | When the full-grown poet came, | |
528 | Out spake pleased Nature (the round impassive globe, with all its | |
529 | shows of day and night,) saying, He is mine; | |
530 | But out spake too the Soul of man, proud, jealous and unreconciled, | |
531 | Nay he is mine alone; | |
532 | --Then the full-grown poet stood between the two, and took each | |
533 | by the hand; | |
534 | And to-day and ever so stands, as blender, uniter, tightly holding hands, | |
535 | Which he will never release until he reconciles the two, | |
536 | And wholly and joyously blends them. | |
537 | ||
c7bed260 | 538 | =head2 v5.13.10 - Egill Skalla-Grímsson, L<Egils saga Skalla-Grímssonar|http://www.heimskringla.no/wiki/Egils_saga_Skalla-Gr%C3%ADmssonar> |
f1e17f6f | 539 | |
fbc70a9e | 540 | L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Ævar Arnfjörð Bjarmason|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/02/msg169340.html> |
30688243 | 541 | |
806849f8 FR |
542 | Skalat maðr rúnar rísta, |
543 | nema ráða vel kunni. | |
544 | Þat verðr mörgum manni, | |
545 | es of myrkvan staf villisk. | |
546 | Sák á telgðu talkni | |
547 | tíu launstafi ristna. | |
548 | Þat hefr lauka lindi | |
f1e17f6f | 549 | langs ofrtrega fengit. |
30688243 | 550 | |
79af17bd AB |
551 | =head2 v5.13.9 - John F Kennedy, L<Inaugural Address January 20, 1961|http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/John_F._Kennedy%27s_Inaugural_Address> |
552 | ||
553 | L<Announced on 2011-01-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168335.html> | |
554 | ||
555 | In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been | |
556 | granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I | |
557 | do not shrink from this responsibility -- I welcome it. I do not believe | |
558 | that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other | |
559 | generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this | |
560 | endeavor will light our country and all who serve it. And the glow from | |
561 | that fire can truly light the world. | |
562 | ||
563 | And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you; | |
564 | ask what you can do for your country. | |
565 | ||
566 | My fellow citizens of the world, ask not what America will do for you, | |
567 | but what together we can do for the freedom of man. | |
568 | ||
569 | Finally, whether you are citizens of America or citizens of the world, | |
570 | ask of us here the same high standards of strength and sacrifice which | |
571 | we ask of you. With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history | |
572 | the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth to lead the land we love, | |
573 | asking His blessing and His help, but knowing that here on earth God's | |
574 | work must truly be our own. | |
575 | ||
94521723 Z |
576 | =head2 v5.13.8 - Roger Williams, L<"The Fifth Gift"|http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/8/19/21304/8493> |
577 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
578 | L<Announced on 2010-12-19 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/12/msg167271.html> |
579 | ||
94521723 Z |
580 | The aliens called the box a "matter generator," but we'd be more inclined |
581 | to call it a matter duplicator. By connecting switches and potentiometers | |
582 | between the copper posts it was possible to make the box mark off two | |
583 | cubic rectangular areas of volume. Make a certain contact, and these | |
584 | areas would be isolated within perfectly reflective fields. They could | |
585 | be expanded or contracted by altering resistances between other posts. | |
586 | As I worked out the user interface I built a little control panel for | |
587 | the device. It was actually a clever way for the aliens to do things; | |
588 | instead of trying to build controls we could use, they built us an | |
589 | interface we could attach to controls that made sense to us. It could | |
590 | also be automated. | |
591 | ||
592 | Once you had made the contact that established the shielded volumes, | |
593 | if you made another certain contact the contents of the first volume | |
594 | were copied to the second. The machine copied metal, plastic, steel, | |
595 | and diamond with equal ease. Copies of copies of copies of copies were | |
596 | indistinguishable from the originals at any magnification, even using | |
597 | techniques like X-ray crystallography. | |
598 | ||
6b1649d0 CBW |
599 | =head2 v5.13.7 - Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski, 'The Matrix' |
600 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
601 | L<Announced on 2010-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/11/msg166162.html> |
602 | ||
6b1649d0 CBW |
603 | [Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one] |
604 | ||
605 | Neo: Whoa. Deja vu. | |
606 | ||
607 | [Everyone freezes right in their tracks] | |
608 | ||
609 | Trinity: What did you just say? | |
610 | Neo: Nothing. Just had a little deja vu. | |
611 | Trinity: What did you see? | |
612 | Cypher: What happened? | |
613 | Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just like it. | |
614 | Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat? | |
615 | Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure. | |
616 | Morpheus: Switch! Apoc! | |
617 | Neo: What is it? | |
618 | Trinity: A deja vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when they change something. | |
619 | ||
54cc2c9a TM |
620 | =head2 v5.13.6 - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore" |
621 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
622 | L<Announced on 2010-10-20 by Tatsuhiko Miyagawa|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/10/msg165183.html> |
623 | ||
54cc2c9a TM |
624 | The boy called Crow softly rests a hand on my shoulder, and with that |
625 | he storm vanishes. | |
626 | ||
627 | "From now on -- no matter what -- you've got to be the world's toughest | |
628 | fifteen-year-old. That's the only way you're going to survive. And in order | |
629 | to do that, you've got to figure out what it means to be tough. You following | |
630 | me?" | |
631 | ||
632 | I keep my eyes closed and don't reply. I just want to sink off into sleep | |
633 | like this, his hand on my shoulder. I hear the faint flutter of wings. | |
634 | ||
635 | "You're going to be the world's toughest fifteen-year-old," Crow whispers | |
636 | as I try to fall asleep. Like he was carving the words in a deep blue tattoo | |
637 | on my heart. | |
638 | ||
639 | (Translated from Japanese by Philip Gabriel) | |
640 | ||
f6c56125 SH |
641 | =head2 v5.13.5 - Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, "The Room in the Dragon Volant" |
642 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
643 | L<Announced on 2010-09-19 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg164238.html> |
644 | ||
f6c56125 SH |
645 | Candle in hand I stepped in. I do not know whether the quality of |
646 | air, long undisturbed, is peculiar; to me it has always seemed so, and | |
647 | the damp smell of the old masonry hung in this atmosphere. My candle | |
648 | faintly lighted the bare stone wall that enclosed the stair, the foot | |
649 | of which I could not see. Down I went, and a few turns brought me to | |
650 | the stone floor. Here was another door, of the simple, old, oak kind, | |
651 | deep sunk in the thickness of the wall. The large end of the key | |
652 | fitted this. The lock was stiff; I set the candle down upon the | |
653 | stair, and applied both hands; it turned with difficulty, and as it | |
654 | revolved, uttered a shriek that alarmed me for my secret. | |
655 | ||
656 | For some minutes I did not move. In a little time, however, I took | |
657 | courage, and opened the door. The night-air floating in puffed out | |
658 | the candle. There was a thicket of holly and underwood, as dense as a | |
659 | jungle, close about the door. I should have been in pitch-darkness, | |
660 | were it not that through the topmost leaves there twinkled, here and | |
661 | there, a glimmer of moonshine. | |
662 | ||
663 | Softly, lest any one should have opened his window at the sound of the | |
664 | rusty bolt, I struggled through this till I gained a view of the open | |
665 | grounds. Here I found that the brushwood spread a good way up the | |
666 | park, uniting with the wood that approached the little temple I have | |
806849f8 | 667 | described. |
f6c56125 | 668 | |
fdea69f9 FR |
669 | =head2 v5.13.4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
670 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
671 | L<Announced on 2010-08-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163150.html> |
672 | ||
fdea69f9 FR |
673 | `How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought Alice; |
674 | `I might as well be at school at once.' However, she got up, and began to repeat | |
675 | it, but her head was so full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what | |
676 | she was saying, and the words came very queer indeed:-- | |
677 | ||
678 | "'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare, | |
679 | "You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair." | |
680 | As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose | |
681 | Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.' | |
682 | ||
683 | ||
684 | `That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' said the Gryphon. | |
685 | ||
686 | `Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it sounds uncommon | |
687 | nonsense.' | |
688 | ||
689 | Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if | |
690 | anything would ever happen in a natural way again. | |
691 | ||
692 | `I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle. | |
693 | ||
694 | `She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with the next verse.' | |
695 | ||
696 | `But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How could he turn them out | |
697 | with his nose, you know?' | |
698 | ||
699 | `It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was dreadfully puzzled by | |
700 | the whole thing, and longed to change the subject. | |
701 | ||
0feeb912 DG |
702 | =head2 v5.13.3 - Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, "Good Omens" |
703 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
704 | L<Announced on 2010-07-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/07/msg162230.html> |
705 | ||
0feeb912 DG |
706 | Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading towards |
707 | Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would | |
708 | notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth, | |
709 | for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his | |
710 | sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint. | |
711 | ||
712 | Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was | |
713 | dammned if he wasn't going to finish it in the Bentley as well. | |
714 | Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of | |
715 | motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage | |
716 | Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn't have been able to tell | |
717 | that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it | |
718 | had ever even been a car. | |
719 | ||
720 | There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have | |
721 | been black, where it wasn't a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but | |
722 | this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of | |
723 | flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult | |
724 | re-entry. | |
725 | ||
726 | There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the | |
727 | metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still | |
728 | somhow riding an inch above the road surface this didn't seem to | |
729 | make an awful lot of difference to the suspension. | |
730 | ||
731 | It should have fallen apart miles back. | |
732 | ||
3c55f444 MT |
733 | =head2 v5.13.2 - Iain M Banks, "Use of Weapons" |
734 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
735 | L<Announced on 2010-06-22 by Matt S Trout|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/06/msg161112.html> |
736 | ||
51caa79e DG |
737 | We deal in the moral equivalent of black holes, where the normal laws - |
738 | the rules of right and wrong that people imagine apply everywhere else | |
739 | in the universe - break down; beyond those metaphysical event-horizons, | |
3c55f444 MT |
740 | there exist ... special circumstances. |
741 | ||
742 | =head2 v5.13.1 - Miguel de Unamuno, "The Sepulchre of Don Quixote" | |
d069c093 | 743 | |
2831a86c ZA |
744 | L<Announced on 2010-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160275.html> |
745 | ||
d069c093 RS |
746 | And if anyone shall come to you and say that he knows how to construct |
747 | bridges and that perhaps a time will come when you will wish to avail | |
748 | yourself of his science in order to cross over a river, out with him! Out | |
749 | with the engineer! Rivers will be crossed by wading or swimming them, even | |
750 | if half the crusaders drown themselves. Let the engineer go off and build | |
751 | bridges somewhere else, where they are badly wanted. For those who go in | |
752 | quest of the sepulchre, faith is bridge enough. | |
753 | ||
c7bed260 Z |
754 | =head2 v5.13.0 - Jules Verne, "A Journey to the Centre of the Earth" |
755 | ||
756 | L<Announced on 2010-04-20 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg159275.html> | |
757 | ||
758 | The heat still remained at quite a supportable degree. With an | |
759 | involuntary shudder, I reflected on what the heat must have been | |
760 | when the volcano of Sneffels was pouring its smoke, flames, and | |
761 | streams of boiling lava -- all of which must have come up by the | |
762 | road we were now following. I could imagine the torrents of hot | |
763 | seething stone darting on, bubbling up with accompaniments of | |
764 | smoke, steam, and sulphurous stench! | |
765 | ||
766 | "Only to think of the consequences," I mused, "if the old | |
767 | volcano were once more to set to work." | |
768 | ||
769 | =head2 v5.12.3 - Howard W. Campbell, Jr., "Reflections on Not Participating in Current Events" | |
770 | ||
771 | L<Announced on 2011-01-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168368.html> | |
772 | ||
773 | I saw a huge steam roller, | |
774 | It blotted out the sun. | |
775 | The people all lay down, lay down; | |
776 | They did not try to run. | |
777 | My love and I, we looked amazed | |
778 | Upon the gory mystery. | |
779 | 'Lie down, lie down!' the people cried. | |
780 | 'The great machine is history!' | |
781 | My love and I, we ran away, | |
782 | The engine did not find us. | |
783 | We ran up to a mountain top, | |
784 | Left history far behind us. | |
785 | Perhaps we should have stayed and died, | |
786 | But somehow we don't think so. | |
787 | We went to see where history'd been, | |
788 | And my, the dead did stink so. | |
789 | ||
790 | =head2 v5.12.2 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition" | |
791 | ||
792 | L<Announced on 2010-09-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg163852.html> | |
793 | ||
794 | CPUs. Cayce Pollard Units. That's what Damien calls the clothing | |
795 | she wears. CPUs are either black, white, or gray, and ideally | |
796 | seem to have come into this world without human intervention. | |
797 | ||
798 | What people take for relentless minimalism is a side effect | |
799 | of too much exposure to the reactor-cores of fashion. This | |
800 | has resulted in a remorseless paring-down of what she can and | |
801 | will wear. She is, literally, allergic to fashion. She can | |
802 | only tolerate things that could have been worn, to a general | |
803 | lack of comment, during any year between 1945 and 2000. She's a | |
804 | design-free zone, a one-woman school of and whose very austerity | |
805 | periodically threatens to spawn its own cult. | |
806 | ||
807 | =head2 v5.12.2-RC1 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition" | |
808 | ||
809 | L<Announced on 2010-08-31 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163670.html> | |
810 | ||
811 | The front page opens, familiar as a friend's living room. A frame-grab | |
812 | from #48 serves as backdrop, dim and almost monochrome, no characters in | |
813 | view. This is one of the sequences that generate comparisons with | |
814 | Tarkovsky. She only knows Tarkovsky from stills, really, though she did | |
815 | once fall asleep during a screening of The Stalker, going under on an | |
816 | endless pan, the camera aimed straight down, in close-up, at a puddle on | |
817 | a ruined mosaic floor. But she is not one of those who think that much | |
818 | will be gained by analysis of the maker's imagined influences. The cult | |
819 | of the footage is rife with subcults, claiming every possible influence. | |
820 | Truffaut, Peckinpah -- The Peckinpah people, among the least likely, are | |
821 | still waiting for the guns to be drawn. | |
822 | ||
4363636d DG |
823 | =head2 v5.12.1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle" |
824 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
825 | L<Announced on 2010-05-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160109.html> |
826 | ||
4363636d DG |
827 | "Now suppose," chortled Dr. Breed, enjoying himself, "that there were |
828 | many possible ways in which water could crystallize, could freeze. | |
d517a16a Z |
829 | Suppose that the sort of ice we skate upon and put into highballs -- |
830 | what we might call ice-one -- is only one of several types of ice. | |
4363636d DG |
831 | Suppose water always froze as ice-one on Earth because it had never |
832 | had a seed to teach it how to form ice-two, ice-three, ice-four | |
833 | ...? And suppose," he rapped on his desk with his old hand again, | |
d517a16a Z |
834 | "that there were one form, which we will call ice-nine -- a crystal as |
835 | hard as this desk -- with a melting point of, let us say, one-hundred | |
4363636d DG |
836 | degrees Fahrenheit, or, better still, a melting point of one-hundred- |
837 | and-thirty degrees." | |
838 | ||
4363636d DG |
839 | =head2 v5.12.1-RC2 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle" |
840 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
841 | L<Announced on 2010-05-13 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160066.html> |
842 | ||
4363636d DG |
843 | San Lorenzo was fifty miles long and twenty miles wide, I learned from |
844 | the supplement to the New York Sunday Times. Its population was four | |
845 | hundred, fifty thousand souls, "...all fiercely dedicated to the ideals | |
846 | of the Free World." | |
847 | ||
848 | Its highest point, Mount McCabe, was eleven thousand feet above sea | |
849 | level. Its capital was Bolivar, "...a strikingly modern city built on a | |
850 | harbor capable of sheltering the entire United States Navy." The principal | |
851 | exports were sugar, coffee, bananas, indigo, and handcrafted novelties. | |
852 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
853 | =head2 v5.12.1-RC1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle" |
854 | ||
855 | L<Announced on 2010-05-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg159971.html> | |
4363636d | 856 | |
4363636d DG |
857 | Which brings me to the Bokononist concept of a wampeter. A wampeter is |
858 | the pivot of a karass. No karass is without a wampeter, Bokonon tells us, | |
859 | just as no wheel is without a hub. Anything can be a wampeter: a tree, | |
860 | a rock, an animal, an idea, a book, a melody, the Holy Grail. Whatever | |
861 | it is, the members of its karass revolve about it in the majestic chaos | |
862 | of a spiral nebula. The orbits of the members of a karass about their | |
863 | common wampeter are spiritual orbits, naturally. It is souls and not | |
864 | bodies that revolve. As Bokonon invites us to sing: | |
865 | ||
866 | Around and around and around we spin, | |
867 | With feet of lead and wings of tin . . . | |
868 | ||
4363636d DG |
869 | =head2 v5.12.0 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
870 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
871 | L<Announced on 2010-04-12 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158820.html> |
872 | ||
4363636d DG |
873 | 'Please would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, for she was |
874 | not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, 'why | |
875 | your cat grins like that?' | |
876 | ||
877 | 'It's a Cheshire cat,' said the Duchess, 'and that's why. Pig!' | |
878 | ||
879 | She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite | |
880 | jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby, | |
881 | and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:-- | |
882 | ||
883 | 'I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know | |
884 | that cats COULD grin.' | |
885 | ||
886 | 'They all can,' said the Duchess; 'and most of 'em do.' | |
887 | ||
4363636d DG |
888 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC5 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
889 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
890 | L<Announced on 2010-04-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158720.html> |
891 | ||
4363636d DG |
892 | 'Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly; 'some of the words |
893 | have got altered.' | |
894 | ||
895 | 'It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar decidedly, and | |
896 | there was silence for some minutes. | |
897 | ||
4363636d DG |
898 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
899 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
900 | L<Announced on 2010-04-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158567.html> |
901 | ||
4363636d DG |
902 | 'It was much pleasanter at home,' thought poor Alice, 'when one wasn't |
903 | always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and | |
904 | rabbits. I almost wish I hadn't gone down that rabbit-hole--and yet--and | |
905 | yet--it's rather curious, you know, this sort of life! I do wonder what | |
906 | can have happened to me! When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that | |
907 | kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one! | |
908 | ||
4363636d DG |
909 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC3 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
910 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
911 | L<Announced on 2010-04-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158346.html> |
912 | ||
4363636d DG |
913 | At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them, |
914 | called out, 'Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL soon make you | |
915 | dry enough!' They all sat down at once, in a large ring, with the Mouse | |
916 | in the middle. Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt | |
917 | sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon. | |
918 | ||
919 | 'Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, 'are you all ready? This | |
920 | is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! "William | |
921 | the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was soon submitted | |
922 | to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of late much | |
923 | accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of | |
d517a16a | 924 | Mercia and Northumbria --"' |
4363636d | 925 | |
2831a86c | 926 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC2 - no announcement |
4363636d | 927 | |
2831a86c | 928 | Available on CPAN since 2010-04-01. |
4363636d | 929 | |
3e340399 | 930 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" |
4363636d | 931 | |
2831a86c ZA |
932 | L<Announced on 2010-03-29 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg158060.html> |
933 | ||
4363636d DG |
934 | So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the |
935 | hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of | |
936 | making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and | |
937 | picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran | |
938 | close by her. | |
939 | ||
940 | There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice think it so | |
941 | VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, 'Oh dear! Oh | |
942 | dear! I shall be late!' (when she thought it over afterwards, it | |
943 | occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this, but at the time | |
944 | it all seemed quite natural); but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH | |
945 | OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on, | |
946 | Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had | |
947 | never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to | |
948 | take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the field | |
949 | after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large | |
950 | rabbit-hole under the hedge. | |
951 | ||
952 | In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how | |
953 | in the world she was to get out again. | |
954 | ||
0e6b8110 | 955 | =head2 v5.12.0-RC0 - no epigraph |
4363636d | 956 | |
2831a86c | 957 | L<Announced on 2020-03-21 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg157761.html> |
4363636d | 958 | |
3e340399 | 959 | =head2 v5.11.5 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "Christabel" |
4363636d | 960 | |
2831a86c ZA |
961 | L<Announced on 2010-02-21 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/02/msg156957.html> |
962 | ||
4363636d DG |
963 | A little child, a limber elf, |
964 | Singing, dancing to itself, | |
965 | A fairy thing with red round cheeks, | |
966 | That always finds, and never seeks, | |
967 | Makes such a vision to the sight | |
968 | As fills a father's eyes with light; | |
969 | And pleasures flow in so thick and fast | |
970 | Upon his heart, that he at last | |
971 | Must needs express his love's excess | |
972 | With words of unmeant bitterness. | |
973 | Perhaps 'tis pretty to force together | |
974 | Thoughts so all unlike each other; | |
975 | To mutter and mock a broken charm, | |
976 | To dally with wrong that does no harm. | |
977 | Perhaps 'tis tender too and pretty | |
978 | At each wild word to feel within | |
979 | A sweet recoil of love and pity. | |
980 | And what, if in a world of sin | |
981 | (O sorrow and shame should this be true!) | |
982 | Such giddiness of heart and brain | |
983 | Comes seldom save from rage and pain, | |
984 | So talks as it's most used to do. | |
985 | ||
4363636d DG |
986 | =head2 v5.11.4 - Fyodor Dostoevsky, "Crime and Punishment" |
987 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
988 | L<Announced on 2010-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/01/msg155848.html> |
989 | ||
4363636d DG |
990 | And you don't suppose that I went into it headlong like a fool? I went |
991 | into it like a wise man, and that was just my destruction. And you | |
992 | mustn't suppose that I didn't know, for instance, that if I began to | |
993 | question myself whether I had the right to gain power -- I certainly | |
994 | hadn't the right -- or that if I asked myself whether a human being is a | |
995 | louse it proved that it wasn't so for me, though it might be for a man | |
996 | who would go straight to his goal without asking questions.... If I | |
997 | worried myself all those days, wondering whether Napoleon would have | |
998 | done it or not, I felt clearly of course that I wasn't Napoleon. | |
999 | ||
4363636d DG |
1000 | =head2 v5.11.3 - Mark Twain, "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer" |
1001 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1002 | L<Announced on 2009-12-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/12/msg154838.html> |
1003 | ||
4363636d | 1004 | "Say -- I'm going in a swimming, I am. Don't you wish you could? But of |
d517a16a | 1005 | course you'd druther work -- wouldn't you? Course you would!" |
4363636d DG |
1006 | |
1007 | Tom contemplated the boy a bit, and said: "What do you call work?" | |
1008 | ||
1009 | "Why ain't that work?" | |
1010 | ||
1011 | Tom resumed his whitewashing, and answered carelessly: "Well, maybe it | |
1012 | is, and maybe it aint. All I know, is, it suits Tom Sawyer." | |
1013 | ||
1014 | "Oh come, now, you don't mean to let on that you like it?" | |
1015 | ||
1016 | The brush continued to move. "Like it? Well I don't see why I oughtn't | |
1017 | to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?" | |
1018 | ||
1019 | That put the thing in a new light. Ben stopped nibbling his apple. Tom | |
1020 | swept his brush daintily back and forth -- stepped back to note the effect | |
1021 | -- added a touch here and there-criticised the effect again -- Ben | |
1022 | watching every move and getting more and more interested, more and more | |
1023 | absorbed. Presently he said: "Say, Tom, let me whitewash a little." | |
1024 | ||
4363636d DG |
1025 | =head2 v5.11.2 - Michael Marshall Smith, "Only Forward" |
1026 | ||
f0ccce9b | 1027 | L<Announced on 2009-11-20 by Léon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/11/msg153646.html> |
2831a86c | 1028 | |
4363636d DG |
1029 | The streets were pretty quiet, which was nice. They're always quiet here |
1030 | at that time: you have to be wearing a black jacket to be out on the | |
1031 | streets between seven and nine in the evening, and not many people in | |
1032 | the area have black jackets. It's just one of those things. I currently | |
1033 | live in Colour Neighbourhood, which is for people who are heavily into | |
1034 | colour. All the streets and buildings are set for instant colourmatch: | |
1035 | as you walk down the road they change hue to offset whatever you're | |
1036 | wearing. When the streets are busy it's kind of intense, and anyone | |
1037 | prone to epileptic seizures isn't allowed to live in the Neighbourhood, | |
1038 | however much they're into colour. | |
1039 | ||
4363636d DG |
1040 | =head2 v5.11.1 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22" |
1041 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1042 | L<Announced on 2009-10-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg152360.html> |
1043 | ||
4363636d DG |
1044 | Milo had been caught red-handed in the act of plundering his countrymen, |
1045 | and, as a result, his stock had never been higher. He proved good as his | |
1046 | word when a rawboned major from Minnesota curled his lip in rebellious | |
1047 | disavowal and demanded his share of the syndicate Milo kept saying | |
1048 | everybody owned. Milo met the challenge by writing the words "A Share" | |
1049 | on the nearest scrap of paper and handing it away with a virtuous disdain | |
1050 | that won the envy and admiration of almost everyone who knew him. His | |
1051 | glory was at a peak, and Colonel Cathcart, who knew and admired his | |
1052 | war record, was astonished by the deferential humility with which Mil | |
1053 | presented himself at Group Headquarters and made his fantastic appeal | |
1054 | for more hazardous assignment. | |
1055 | ||
4363636d DG |
1056 | =head2 v5.11.0 - Mikhail Bulgakov, "The Master and Margarita" |
1057 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1058 | L<Announced on 2009-10-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg151376.html> |
1059 | ||
4363636d DG |
1060 | Whispers of an "evil power" were heard in lines at dairy shops, in |
1061 | streetcars, stores, arguments, kitchens, suburban and long-distance | |
1062 | trains, at stations large and small, in dachas and on beaches. Needless | |
1063 | to say, truly mature and cultured people did not tell these stories | |
1064 | about an evil power's visit to the capital. In fact, they even made fun | |
1065 | of them and tried to talk sense into those who told them. Nevertheless, | |
1066 | facts are facts, as they say, and cannot simply be dismissed without | |
1067 | explanation: somebody had visited the capital. The charred cinders of | |
1068 | Griboyedov alone, and many other things besides, confirmed it. Cultured | |
1069 | people shared the point of view of the investigating team: it was the | |
1070 | work of a gang of hypnotists and ventriloquists magnificently skilled in | |
1071 | their art. | |
1072 | ||
4363636d DG |
1073 | =head2 v5.10.1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister" |
1074 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1075 | L<Announced on 2009-09-23 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150172.html> |
1076 | ||
4363636d DG |
1077 | 'Briefly, sir, I am the Permanent Under-Secretary of State, known as |
1078 | the Permanent Secretary. Woolley here is your Principal Private | |
1079 | Secretary. I, too, have a Principal Private Secretary, and he is the | |
1080 | Principal Private Secretary to the Permanent Secretary. Directly | |
1081 | responsible to me are ten Deputy Secretaries, eighty-seven Under | |
1082 | Secretaries and two hundred and nineteen Assistant Secretaries. | |
1083 | Directly responsible to the Principal Private Secretaries are plain | |
1084 | Private Secretaries. The Prime Minister will be appointing two | |
1085 | Parliamentary Under-Secretaries and you will be appointing your own | |
1086 | Parliamentary Private Secretary.' | |
1087 | ||
1088 | 'Can they all type?' I joked. | |
1089 | ||
1090 | 'None of us can type, Minister,' replied Sir Humphrey smoothly. 'Mrs | |
1091 | McKay types - she is your Secretary.' | |
1092 | ||
1093 | I couldn't tell whether or not he was joking. 'What a pity,' I said. | |
1094 | 'We could have opened an agency.' | |
1095 | ||
1096 | Sir Humphrey and Bernard laughed. 'Very droll, sir,' said Sir | |
1097 | Humphrey. 'Most amusing, sir,' said Bernard. Were they genuinely | |
1098 | amused at my wit, or just being rather patronising? 'I suppose they | |
1099 | all say that, do they?' I ventured. | |
1100 | ||
1101 | Sir Humphrey reassured me on that. 'Certainly not, Minister,' he | |
1102 | replied. 'Not quite all.' | |
1103 | ||
0e6b8110 | 1104 | =head2 v5.10.1-RC2 - no epigraph |
4363636d | 1105 | |
2831a86c | 1106 | L<Announced on 2009-08-18 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150015.html> |
3e340399 | 1107 | |
0e6b8110 | 1108 | =head2 v5.10.1-RC1 - no epigraph |
4363636d | 1109 | |
2831a86c | 1110 | L<Announced on 2009-08-06 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg149498.html> |
3e340399 | 1111 | |
c7bed260 | 1112 | =head2 v5.10.0 - Laurence Sterne, "Tristram Shandy" |
4363636d | 1113 | |
c7bed260 Z |
1114 | L<Announced on 2007-12-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/12/msg131636.html> |
1115 | ||
1116 | He would often declare, in speaking his thoughts upon the subject, that | |
1117 | he did not conceive how the greatest family in England could stand it | |
1118 | out against an uninterrupted succession of six or seven short | |
1119 | noses.--And for the contrary reason, he would generally add, That it | |
1120 | must be one of the greatest problems in civil life, where the same | |
1121 | number of long and jolly noses, following one another in a direct line, | |
1122 | did not raise and hoist it up into the best vacancies in the kingdom. | |
1123 | ||
1124 | =head2 v5.10.0-RC2 - no epigraph | |
1125 | ||
1126 | L<Announced on 2007-11-25 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130978.html> | |
1127 | ||
1128 | =head2 v5.10.0-RC1 - no epigraph | |
1129 | ||
1130 | L<Announced on 2007-11-17 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130653.html> | |
1131 | ||
1132 | =head2 v5.9.5 - no announcement | |
1133 | ||
1134 | L<Pre-announced on 2007-07-07 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/07/msg126358.html>, | |
1135 | available on CPAN with same date, but never actually announced. | |
1136 | ||
1137 | =head2 v5.9.4 - no epigraph | |
1138 | ||
1139 | L<Announced on 2006-08-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/08/msg115782.html> | |
1140 | ||
1141 | =head2 v5.9.3 - no epigraph | |
1142 | ||
1143 | L<Announced on 2006-01-28 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg109086.html> | |
1144 | ||
1145 | =head2 v5.9.2 - Thomas Pynchon, "V" | |
1146 | ||
1147 | L<Announced on 2005-04-01 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20050401150702.2b4a70d5@grubert.mandrakesoft.com> | |
1148 | ||
1149 | This word flip was weird. Every recording date of McClintic's he'd | |
1150 | gotten into the habit of talking electricity with the audio men and | |
1151 | technicians of the studio. McClintic once couldn't have cared less | |
1152 | about electricity, but now it seemed if that was helping him reach a | |
1153 | bigger audience, some digging, some who would never dig, but all | |
1154 | paying and those royalties keeping the Triumph in gas and McClintic | |
1155 | in J. Press suits, then McClintic ought to be grateful to | |
1156 | electricity, ought maybe to learn a little more about it. So he'd | |
1157 | picked up some here and there, and one day last summer he got around | |
1158 | to talking stochastic music and digital computers with one | |
1159 | technician. Out of the conversation had come Set/Reset, which was | |
1160 | getting to be a signature for the group. He had found out from this | |
1161 | sound man about a two-triode circuit called a flip-flop, which when | |
1162 | it turned on could be one of two ways, depending on which tube was | |
1163 | conducting and which was cut off: set or reset, flip or flop. | |
1164 | ||
1165 | "And that," the man said, "can be yes or no, or one or zero. And | |
1166 | that is what you might call one of the basic units, or specialized | |
1167 | `cells' in a big `electronic brain.' " | |
1168 | ||
1169 | "Crazy," said McClintic, having lost him back there someplace. But | |
1170 | one thing that did occur to him was if a computer's brain could go | |
1171 | flip or flop, why so could a musician's. As long as you were flop, | |
1172 | everything was cool. But where did the trigger-pulse come from to | |
1173 | make you flip? | |
1174 | ||
1175 | =head2 v5.9.1 - Tom Stoppard, "Arcadia" | |
1176 | ||
1177 | L<Announced on 2004-03-16 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/8587d77c565f2d43> | |
1178 | ||
1179 | Aren't you supposed to have a pony? | |
1180 | ||
1181 | =head2 v5.9.0 - Doris Lessing, "Martha Quest" | |
1182 | ||
1183 | L<Announced on 2003-10-27 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/63a8c34385de82a1> | |
1184 | ||
1185 | What of October, that ambiguous month | |
4363636d | 1186 | |
4363636d DG |
1187 | =head2 v5.8.9 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister" |
1188 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1189 | L<Announced on 2008-12-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/12/msg142571.html> |
1190 | ||
4363636d DG |
1191 | Frank and I, unlike the civil servants, were still puzzled that such a |
1192 | proposal as the Europass could even be seriously under consideration by | |
1193 | the FCO. We can both see clearly that it is wonderful ammunition for the | |
1194 | anti-Europeans. I asked Humphrey if the Foreign Office doesn't realise | |
1195 | how damaging this would be to the European ideal? | |
1196 | ||
1197 | 'I'm sure they do, Minister, he said. That's why they support it.' | |
1198 | ||
1199 | This was even more puzzling, since I'd always been under the impression | |
1200 | that the FO is pro-Europe. 'Is it or isn't it?' I asked Humphrey. | |
1201 | ||
1202 | 'Yes and no,' he replied of course, 'if you'll pardon the | |
1203 | expression. The Foreign Office is pro-Europe because it is really | |
1204 | anti-Europe. In fact the Civil Service was united in its desire to make | |
1205 | sure the Common Market didn't work. That's why we went into it.' | |
1206 | ||
1207 | This sounded like a riddle to me. I asked him to explain further. And | |
1208 | basically his argument was as follows: Britain has had the same foreign | |
1209 | policy objective for at least the last five hundred years - to create a | |
1210 | disunited Europe. In that cause we have fought with the Dutch against | |
1211 | the Spanish, with the Germans against the French, with the French and | |
1212 | Italians against the Germans, and with the French against the Italians | |
1213 | and Germans. [The Dutch rebellion against Phillip II of Spain, the | |
1214 | Napoleonic Wars, the First World War, and the Second World War - Ed.] | |
1215 | ||
1216 | In other words, divide and rule. And the Foreign Office can see no | |
1217 | reason to change when it has worked so well until now. | |
1218 | ||
1219 | I was aware of this, naturally, but I regarded it as ancient history. | |
1220 | Humphrey thinks that it is, in fact, current policy. It was necessary | |
1221 | for us to break up the EEC, he explained, so we had to get inside. We | |
1222 | had previously tried to break it up from the outside, but that didn't | |
1223 | work. [A reference to our futile and short-lived involvement in EFTA, | |
1224 | the European Free Trade Association, founded in 1960 and which the UK | |
1225 | left in 1972 - Ed.] Now that we're in, we are able to make a complete | |
1226 | pig's breakfast out of it. We've now set the Germans against the French, | |
1227 | the French against the Italians, the Italians against the Dutch... and | |
1228 | the Foreign office is terribly happy. It's just like old time. | |
1229 | ||
1230 | I was staggered by all of this. I thought that the all of us who are | |
1231 | publicly pro-European believed in the European ideal. I said this to Sir | |
1232 | Humphrey, and he simply chuckled. | |
1233 | ||
1234 | So I asked him: if we don't believe in the European Ideal, why are we | |
1235 | pushing to increase the membership? | |
1236 | ||
1237 | 'Same reason,' came the reply. 'It's just like the United Nations. The | |
1238 | more members it has, the more arguments you can stir up, and the more | |
1239 | futile and impotent it becomes.' | |
1240 | ||
1241 | This all strikes me as the most appalling cynicism, and I said so. | |
1242 | ||
1243 | Sir Humphrey agreed completely. 'Yes Minister. We call it | |
1244 | diplomacy. It's what made Britain great, you know.' | |
1245 | ||
4363636d DG |
1246 | =head2 v5.8.9-RC2 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister" |
1247 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1248 | L<Announced on 2008-12-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg142422.html> |
1249 | ||
4363636d DG |
1250 | There was silence in the office. I didn't know what we were going to do |
1251 | about the four hundred new people supervising our economy drive or the | |
1252 | four hundred new people for the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office, or | |
1253 | anything! I simply sat and waited and hoped that my head would stop | |
1254 | thumping and that some idea would be suggested by someone sometime soon. | |
1255 | ||
1256 | Sir Humphrey obliged. 'Minister... if we were to end the economy drive | |
1257 | and close the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office we could issue an immediate | |
1258 | press announcement that you had axed eight hundred jobs.' He had | |
1259 | obviously thought this out carefully in advance, for at this moment he | |
1260 | produced a slim folder from under his arm. 'If you'd like to approve | |
1261 | this draft...' | |
1262 | ||
1263 | I couldn't believe the impertinence of the suggestion. Axed eight | |
1264 | hundred jobs? 'But no one was ever doing these jobs,' I pointed out | |
1265 | incredulously. 'No one's been appointed yet.' | |
1266 | ||
1267 | 'Even greater economy,' he replied instantly. 'We've saved eight hundred | |
1268 | redundancy payments as well.' | |
1269 | ||
1270 | 'But...' I attempted to explain '... that's just phony. It's dishonest, | |
1271 | it's juggling with figures, it's pulling the wool over people's eyes.' | |
1272 | ||
1273 | 'A government press release, in fact.' said Humphrey. | |
1274 | ||
4363636d DG |
1275 | =head2 v5.8.9-RC1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister" |
1276 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1277 | L<Announced on 2008-11-10 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg141515.html> |
1278 | ||
4363636d DG |
1279 | A jumbo jet touched down, with BURANDAN AIRWAYS written on the side. I |
1280 | was hugely impressed. British Airways are having to pawn their Concordes, | |
1281 | and here is this little tiny African state with its own airline, jumbo | |
1282 | jets and all. | |
1283 | ||
1284 | I asked Bernard how many planes Burandan Airways had. 'None,' he said. | |
1285 | ||
1286 | I told him not to be silly and use his eyes. 'No Minister, it belongs to | |
1287 | Freddie Laker,' he said. 'They chartered it last week and repainted it | |
1288 | specially.' Apparently most of the Have-Nots (I mean, LDCs) do this - at | |
1289 | the opening of the UN General Assembly the runways of Kennedy Airport are | |
1290 | jam-packed with phoney flag-carriers. 'In fact,' said Bernard with a sly | |
1291 | grin, 'there was one 747 that belonged to nine different African airlines | |
1292 | in a month. They called it the mumbo-jumbo.' | |
1293 | ||
1294 | While we watched nothing much happening on the TV except the mumbo-jumbo | |
1295 | taxiing around Prestwick and the Queen looking a bit chilly, Bernard gave | |
1296 | me the next day's schedule and explained that I was booked on the night | |
1297 | sleeper from King's Cross to Edinburgh because I had to vote in a | |
1298 | three-line whip at the House tonight and would have to miss the last | |
1299 | plane. Then the commentator, in that special hushed BBC voice used for any | |
1300 | occasion with which Royalty is connected, announced reverentially that we | |
1301 | were about to catch our first glimpse of President Selim. | |
1302 | ||
1303 | And out of the plane stepped Charlie. My old friend Charlie Umtali. We | |
1304 | were at LSE together. Not Selim Mohammed at all, but Charlie. | |
1305 | ||
1306 | Bernard asked me if I were sure. Silly question. How could you forget a | |
1307 | name like Charlie Umtali? | |
1308 | ||
1309 | I sent Bernard for Sir Humphrey, who was delighted to hear that we now | |
1310 | know something about our official visitor. | |
1311 | ||
1312 | Bernard's official brief said nothing. Amazing! Amazing how little the FCO | |
1313 | has been able to find out. Perhaps they were hoping it would all be on the | |
1314 | car radio. All the brief says is that Colonel Selim Mohammed had converted | |
1315 | to Islam some years ago, they didn't know his original name, and therefore | |
1316 | knew little of his background. | |
1317 | ||
1318 | I was able to tell Humphrey and Bernard /all/ about his background. | |
1319 | Charlie was a red-hot political economist, I informed them. Got the top | |
1320 | first. Wiped the floor with everyone. | |
1321 | ||
1322 | Bernard seemed relieved. 'Well that's all right then.' | |
1323 | ||
1324 | 'Why?' I enquired. | |
1325 | ||
1326 | 'I think Bernard means,' said Sir Humphrey helpfully, 'that he'll know how | |
1327 | to behave if he was at an English University. Even if it was the LSE.' I | |
1328 | never know whether or not Humphrey is insulting me intentionally. | |
1329 | ||
1330 | Humphrey was concerned about Charlie's political colour. 'When you said | |
1331 | that he was red-hot, were you speaking politically?' | |
1332 | ||
1333 | In a way I was. 'The thing about Charlie is that you never quite know | |
1334 | where you are with him. He's the sort of chap who follows you into a | |
1335 | revolving door and comes out in front.' | |
1336 | ||
1337 | 'No deeply held convictions?' asked Sir Humphrey. | |
1338 | ||
1339 | 'No. The only thing Charlie was committed too was Charlie.' | |
1340 | ||
1341 | 'Ah, I see. A politician, Minister.' | |
1342 | ||
4363636d DG |
1343 | =head2 v5.8.8 - Joe Raposo, "Bein' Green" |
1344 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1345 | L<Announced on 2006-02-01 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/28caf52e41ebe723> |
1346 | ||
51caa79e DG |
1347 | It's not that easy bein' green |
1348 | Having to spend each day the color of the leaves | |
4363636d | 1349 | When I think it could be nicer being red or yellow or gold |
51caa79e DG |
1350 | Or something much more colorful like that |
1351 | ||
1352 | It's not easy bein' green | |
4363636d | 1353 | It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things |
51caa79e DG |
1354 | And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're |
1355 | Not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water | |
1356 | Or stars in the sky | |
1357 | ||
1358 | But green's the color of Spring | |
1359 | And green can be cool and friendly-like | |
1360 | And green can be big like an ocean | |
1361 | Or important like a mountain | |
4363636d DG |
1362 | Or tall like a tree |
1363 | ||
1364 | When green is all there is to be | |
1365 | It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why? | |
1366 | Wonder I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful | |
1367 | And I think it's what I want to be | |
1368 | ||
4363636d DG |
1369 | =head2 v5.8.8-RC1 - Cosgrove Hall Productions, "Dangermouse" |
1370 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1371 | L<Announced on 2006-01-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/d231fc554af8cc51> |
1372 | ||
1373 | Greenback: And the world is mine, all mine. Muhahahahaha. See to it! | |
51caa79e | 1374 | |
2831a86c | 1375 | Stiletto: Si, Barone. Subito, Barone. |
4363636d | 1376 | |
4363636d DG |
1377 | =head2 v5.8.7 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf" |
1378 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1379 | L<Announced on 2005-05-31 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9a545704a0062f16> |
1380 | ||
4363636d DG |
1381 | And now, imagine the triumphant procession: Peter at the head; after him the |
1382 | hunters leading the wolf; and winding up the procession, grandfather and the | |
1383 | cat. | |
1384 | ||
1385 | Grandfather shook his head discontentedly: "Well, and if Peter hadn't caught | |
51caa79e | 1386 | the wolf? What then?" |
4363636d | 1387 | |
4363636d DG |
1388 | =head2 v5.8.7-RC1 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf" |
1389 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1390 | L<Announced on 2005-05-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/05/msg100711.html> |
1391 | ||
4363636d DG |
1392 | And now this is how things stood: The cat was sitting on one branch. The |
1393 | bird on another, not too close to the cat. And the wolf walked round and | |
1394 | round the tree, looking at them with greedy eyes. | |
1395 | ||
1396 | In the meantime, Peter, without the slightest fear, stood behind the | |
1397 | gate, watching all that was going on. He ran home,got a strong rope and | |
1398 | climbed up the high stone wall. | |
1399 | ||
1400 | One of the branches of the tree, around which the wolf was walking, | |
1401 | stretched out over the wall. | |
1402 | ||
1403 | Grabbing hold of the branch, Peter lightly climbed over on to the tree. | |
1404 | Peter said to the bird: "Fly down and circle round the wolf's head, only | |
1405 | take care that he doesn't catch you!". | |
1406 | ||
1407 | The bird almost touched the wolf's head with its wings, while the wolf | |
1408 | snapped angrily at him from this side and that. | |
1409 | ||
1410 | How that bird teased the wolf, how that wolf wanted to catch him! But | |
51caa79e | 1411 | the bird was clever and the wolf simply couldn't do anything about it. |
4363636d | 1412 | |
4363636d DG |
1413 | =head2 v5.8.6 - A. A. Milne, "The House at Pooh Corner" |
1414 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1415 | L<Announced on 2004-11-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20041128000836.GA304@Bagpuss.unfortu.net> |
1416 | ||
4363636d | 1417 | "Hallo, Pooh," said Piglet, giving a jump of surprise. "I knew it was |
51caa79e | 1418 | you." |
4363636d | 1419 | |
51caa79e | 1420 | "So did I,", said Pooh. "What are you doing?" |
4363636d DG |
1421 | |
1422 | "I'm planting a haycorn, Pooh, so that it can grow up into an oak-tree, | |
1423 | and have lots of haycorns just outside the front door instead of having | |
51caa79e | 1424 | to walk miles and miles, do you see, Pooh?" |
4363636d | 1425 | |
51caa79e | 1426 | "Supposing it doesn't?" said Pooh. |
4363636d DG |
1427 | |
1428 | "It will, because Christopher Robin says it will, so that's why I'm | |
1429 | planting it." | |
1430 | ||
1431 | "Well," aid Pooh, "if I plant a honeycomb outside my house, then it will | |
51caa79e | 1432 | grow up into a beehive." |
4363636d | 1433 | |
51caa79e | 1434 | Piglet wasn't quite sure about this. |
4363636d DG |
1435 | |
1436 | "Or a /piece/ of a honeycomb," said Pooh, "so as not to waste too much. | |
1437 | Only then I might only get a piece of a beehive, and it might be the | |
51caa79e | 1438 | wrong piece, where the bees were buzzing and not hunnying. Bother" |
4363636d | 1439 | |
51caa79e | 1440 | Piglet agreed that that would be rather bothering. |
4363636d DG |
1441 | |
1442 | "Besides, Pooh, it's a very difficult thing, planting unless you know | |
1443 | how to do it," he said; and he put the acorn in the hole he had made, | |
51caa79e | 1444 | and covered it up with earth, and jumped on it. |
4363636d | 1445 | |
4363636d DG |
1446 | =head2 v5.8.6-RC1 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie the Pooh" |
1447 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1448 | L<Announced on 2004-11-11 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/11/msg95786.html> |
1449 | ||
4363636d DG |
1450 | "Hallo!" said Piglet, "whare are /you/ doing?" |
1451 | ||
1452 | "Hunting," said Pooh. | |
1453 | ||
1454 | "Hunting what?" | |
1455 | ||
1456 | "Tracking something," said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously. | |
1457 | ||
1458 | "Tracking what?" said Piglet, coming closer. | |
1459 | ||
1460 | "That's just what I ask myself, I ask myself, What?" | |
1461 | ||
1462 | "What do you think you'll answer?" | |
1463 | ||
1464 | "I shall have to wait until I catch up with it," said Winnie-the-Pooh. | |
1465 | "Now, look there." He pointed to the ground in front of him. "What do | |
1466 | you see there?" | |
1467 | ||
1468 | "Track," said Piglet. "Paw-marks." He gave a little squeak of | |
1469 | excitement. "Oh, Pooh!" Do you think it's a--a--a Woozle?" | |
1470 | ||
4363636d DG |
1471 | =head2 v5.8.5 - wikipedia, "Yew" |
1472 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1473 | L<Announced on 2004-07-19 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/68340e2e4c39222c> |
1474 | ||
4363636d DG |
1475 | Yews are relatively slow growing trees, widely used in landscaping and |
1476 | ornamental horticulture. They have flat, dark-green needles, reddish | |
1477 | bark, and bear seeds with red arils, which are eaten by thrushes, | |
1478 | waxwings and other birds, dispersing the hard seeds undamaged in their | |
1479 | droppings. Yew wood is reddish brown (with white sapwood), and very | |
1480 | hard. It was traditionally used to make bows, especially the English | |
1481 | longbow. | |
1482 | ||
1483 | In England, the Common Yew (Taxus baccata, also known as English Yew) is | |
1484 | often found in churchyards. It is sometimes suggested that these are | |
1485 | placed there as a symbol of long life or trees of death, and some are | |
1486 | likely to be over 3,000 years old. It is also suggested that yew trees | |
1487 | may have a pre-Christian association with old pagan holy sites, and the | |
1488 | Christian church found it expedient to use and take over existing sites. | |
1489 | Another explanation is that the poisonous berries and foliage discourage | |
1490 | farmers and drovers from letting their animals wander into the burial | |
1491 | grounds. The yew tree is a frequent symbol in the Christian poetry of | |
51caa79e | 1492 | T.S. Eliot, especially his Four Quartets. |
4363636d | 1493 | |
4363636d DG |
1494 | =head2 v5.8.5-RC2 - wikipedia, "Beech" |
1495 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1496 | L<Announced on 2004-07-09 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/f92175725af7a5ad> |
1497 | ||
4363636d DG |
1498 | Beeches are trees of the Genus Fagus, family Fagaceae, including about |
1499 | ten species in Europe, Asia, and North America. The leaves are entire or | |
1500 | sparsely toothed. The fruit is a small, sharply-angled nut, borne in | |
1501 | pairs in spiny husks. The beech most commonly grown as an ornamental or | |
1502 | shade tree is the European beech (Fagus sylvatica). | |
1503 | ||
1504 | The southern beeches belong to a different but related genus, | |
1505 | Nothofagus. They are found in Australia, New Zealand, New Guinea, New | |
51caa79e | 1506 | Caledonia and South America. |
4363636d | 1507 | |
4363636d DG |
1508 | =head2 v5.8.5-RC1 - wikipedia, "Pedunculate Oak" (abridged) |
1509 | ||
38183302 | 1510 | L<Announced on 2004-07-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/ca6ce4a7ed9f219c?pli=1> |
2831a86c | 1511 | |
4363636d DG |
1512 | The Pedunculate Oak is called the Common Oak in Britain, and is also |
1513 | often called the English Oak in other English speaking countries It is a | |
1514 | large deciduous tree to 25-35m tall (exceptionally to 40m), with lobed | |
1515 | and sessile (stalk-less) leaves. Flowering takes place in early to mid | |
1516 | spring, and their fruit, called "acorns", ripen by autumn of the same | |
1517 | year. The acorns are pedunculate (having a peduncle or acorn-stalk) and | |
1518 | may occur singly, or several acorns may occur on a stalk. | |
1519 | ||
1520 | It forms a long-lived tree, with a large widespreading head of rugged | |
1521 | branches. While it may naturally live to an age of a few centuries, many | |
1522 | of the oldest trees are pollarded or coppiced, both pruning techniques | |
1523 | that extend the tree's potential lifespan, if not its health. | |
1524 | ||
1525 | Within its native range it is valued for its importance to insects and | |
1526 | other wildlife. Numerous insects live on the leaves, buds, and in the | |
1527 | acorns. The acorns form a valuable food resource for several small | |
1528 | mammals and some birds, notably Jays Garrulus glandarius. | |
1529 | ||
1530 | It is planted for forestry, and produces a long-lasting and durable | |
51caa79e | 1531 | heartwood, much in demand for interior and furniture work. |
4363636d | 1532 | |
4363636d DG |
1533 | =head2 v5.8.4 - T. S. Eliot, "The Old Gumbie Cat" |
1534 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1535 | L<Announced on 2004-04-22 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/c7333acf03ef4015> |
1536 | ||
4363636d DG |
1537 | I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots; |
1538 | The curtain-cord she likes to wind, and tie it into sailor-knots. | |
1539 | She sits upon the window-sill, or anything that's smooth and flat: | |
1540 | She sits and sits and sits and sits -- and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat! | |
1541 | ||
1542 | But when the day's hustle and bustle is done, | |
1543 | Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun. | |
1544 | She thinks that the cockroaches just need employment | |
1545 | To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment. | |
1546 | So she's formed, from that a lot of disorderly louts, | |
1547 | A troop of well-disciplined helpful boy-scouts, | |
1548 | With a purpose in life and a good deed to do-- | |
1549 | And she's even created a Beetles' Tattoo. | |
1550 | ||
4363636d DG |
1551 | So for Old Gumbie Cats let us now give three cheers -- |
1552 | On whom well-ordered households depend, it appears. | |
1553 | ||
4363636d DG |
1554 | |
1555 | =head2 v5.8.4-RC2 - T. S. Eliot, "Macavity: The Mystery Cat" | |
1556 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1557 | L<Announced on 2004-04-16 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/84f6fdd73cc56a1b> |
1558 | ||
4363636d DG |
1559 | Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw -- |
1560 | For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law. | |
1561 | He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair: | |
1562 | For when they reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/! | |
1563 | ||
1564 | Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity, | |
1565 | He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity. | |
1566 | His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare, | |
1567 | And when you reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/! | |
1568 | You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air -- | |
1569 | But I tell you once and once again, /Macavity's not there/! | |
1570 | ||
4363636d DG |
1571 | =head2 v5.8.4-RC1 - T. S. Eliot, "Skimbleshanks: The Railway Cat" |
1572 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1573 | L<Announced on 2004-04-05 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e500353440769ebf> |
1574 | ||
4363636d DG |
1575 | There's a whisper down the line at 11.39 |
1576 | When the Night Mail's ready to depart, | |
1577 | Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble has he gone to hunt the thimble? | |
1578 | We must find him of the train can't start.' | |
1579 | All the guards and all the porters and the stationmaster's daughters | |
1580 | They are searching high and low, | |
1581 | Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble for unless he's very nimble | |
1582 | Then the Night Mail just can't go' | |
1583 | At 11.42 then the signal's overdue | |
1584 | And the passengers are frantic to a man-- | |
1585 | Then Skimble will appear and he'll saunter to the rear: | |
1586 | He's been busy in the luggage van! | |
1587 | He gives one flash of his glass-green eyes | |
1588 | And the the signal goes 'All Clear!' | |
1589 | And we're off at last of the northern part | |
1590 | Of the Northern Hemisphere! | |
1591 | ||
4363636d DG |
1592 | =head2 v5.8.3 - Arthur William Edgar O'Shaugnessy, "Ode" |
1593 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1594 | L<Announced on 2004-01-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/968fb8d71e23af69> |
1595 | ||
51caa79e DG |
1596 | We are the music makers, |
1597 | And we are the dreamers of dreams, | |
1598 | Wandering by lonely sea-breakers, | |
1599 | And sitting by desolate streams; -- | |
1600 | World-losers and world-forsakers, | |
1601 | On whom the pale moon gleams: | |
1602 | Yet we are the movers and shakers | |
1603 | Of the world for ever, it seems. | |
4363636d | 1604 | |
4363636d DG |
1605 | =head2 v5.8.3-RC1 - Irving Berlin, "Let's Face the Music and Dance" |
1606 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1607 | L<Announced on 2004-01-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/5ced50bebcd11c96> |
1608 | ||
4363636d DG |
1609 | There may be trouble ahead, |
1610 | But while there's music and moonlight, | |
1611 | And love and romance, | |
1612 | Let's face the music and dance. | |
1613 | ||
1614 | Before the fiddlers have fled, | |
1615 | Before they ask us to pay the bill, | |
1616 | And while we still have that chance, | |
1617 | Let's face the music and dance. | |
1618 | ||
1619 | Soon, we'll be without the moon, | |
1620 | Humming a different tune, and then, | |
1621 | ||
1622 | There may be teardrops to shed, | |
1623 | So while there's music and moonlight, | |
1624 | And love and romance, | |
1625 | Let's face the music and dance. | |
1626 | ||
4363636d DG |
1627 | =head2 v5.8.2 - Walt Whitman, "Passage to India" |
1628 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1629 | L<Announced on 2003-11-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/4714574f93967673> |
1630 | ||
4363636d DG |
1631 | Passage, immediate passage! the blood burns in my veins! |
1632 | Away O soul! hoist instantly the anchor! | |
1633 | Cut the hawsers - hall out - shake out every sail! | |
1634 | Have we not stood here like trees in the ground long enough? | |
1635 | Have we not grovel'd here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes? | |
1636 | Have we not darken'd and dazed ourselves with books long enough? | |
1637 | ||
4363636d DG |
1638 | Sail forth - steer for the deep waters only, |
1639 | Reckless O soul, exploring, I with the and thou with me, | |
1640 | For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go, | |
1641 | And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all. | |
1642 | ||
1643 | O my brave soul! | |
1644 | O farther farther sail! | |
1645 | O daring job, but safe! are they not all the seas of God? | |
1646 | O farther, farther, farther sail! | |
1647 | ||
4363636d DG |
1648 | =head2 v5.8.2-RC2 - Eric Idle/John Du Prez, "Accountancy Shanty" |
1649 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1650 | L<Announced on 2003-11-03 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/7669de5804b792f6> |
1651 | ||
4363636d DG |
1652 | It's fun to charter an accountant |
1653 | And sail the wide accountan-cy, | |
1654 | To find, explore the funds offshore | |
1655 | And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy. | |
1656 | ||
4363636d DG |
1657 | =head2 v5.8.2-RC1 - Edward Lear, "The Jumblies" |
1658 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1659 | L<Announced on 2003-10-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83680ef3bbf7378d> |
1660 | ||
4363636d DG |
1661 | They went to sea in a Sieve, they did, |
1662 | In a Sieve they went to sea: | |
1663 | In spite of all their friends could say, | |
1664 | On a winter's morn, on a stormy day, | |
1665 | In a Sieve they went to sea! | |
1666 | And when the Sieve turned round and round, | |
1667 | And everyone cried, "You'll all be drowned!" | |
1668 | They cried aloud, "Our Sieve ain't big, | |
1669 | But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig! | |
1670 | In a Sieve we'll go to sea!" | |
1671 | ||
1672 | Far and few, far and few, | |
1673 | Are the lands where the Jumblies live; | |
1674 | Their heads are green, and their hands are blue, | |
1675 | And they went to sea in a Sieve. | |
1676 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1677 | =head2 v5.8.1 - epigraph same as v5.7.1 |
1678 | ||
1679 | L<Announced on 2003-09-25 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82678.html> | |
1680 | ||
1681 | =head2 v5.8.1-RC5 - Terry Pratchett, "Lords and Ladies" | |
1682 | ||
1683 | L<Announced on 2003-09-22 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82476.html> | |
1684 | ||
1685 | No matter what she did with her hair it took about | |
1686 | three minutes for it to tangle itself up again, | |
1687 | like a garden hosepipe in a shed [Footnote: Which, | |
1688 | no matter how carefully coiled, will always uncoil | |
1689 | overnight and tie the lawnmower to the bicycles]. | |
1690 | ||
1691 | =head2 v5.8.1-RC4 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times" | |
1692 | ||
1693 | L<Announced on 2003-08-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/08/msg79184.html> | |
1694 | ||
1695 | Grand Viziers were /always/ scheming megalomaniacs. | |
1696 | It was probably in the job description: "Are you a | |
1697 | devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good, | |
1698 | then you can be my most trusted minister." | |
1699 | ||
1700 | =head2 v5.8.1-RC3 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times" | |
1701 | ||
1702 | L<Announced on 2003-07-30 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg79048.html> | |
1703 | ||
1704 | Lord Hong had a mind like a knife, although possibly | |
1705 | a knife with a curved blade. | |
1706 | ||
1707 | =head2 v5.8.1-RC2 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times" | |
1708 | ||
1709 | L<Announced on 2003-07-11 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78102.html> | |
1710 | ||
1711 | Many an ancient lord's last words had been, "You can't kill | |
1712 | me because I've got magic aaargh." | |
1713 | ||
1714 | =head2 v5.8.1-RC1 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times" | |
1715 | ||
1716 | L<Announced on 2003-07-10 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78009.html> | |
1717 | ||
1718 | Cohen was familiar with city gates. He'd broken down a number | |
1719 | in his time, by battering ram, siege gun, and on one occasion | |
1720 | with his head. | |
1721 | ||
1722 | But the gates of Hunghung were pretty damn good gates. They | |
1723 | weren't like the gates of Ankh-Morpork, which were usually wide | |
1724 | open to attract the spending customer and whose concession to | |
1725 | defense was the sign "Thank You For Not Attacking Our City. | |
1726 | Bonum Diem." These things were big and made of metal and there | |
1727 | was a guardhouse and a squad of unhelpful men in black armor. | |
1728 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1729 | =head2 v5.8.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man" |
1730 | ||
1731 | L<Announced on 2002-07-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63720.html> | |
1732 | ||
1733 | There was the faint sound of footsteps. | |
1734 | "Chap with a whip got as far as the big sharp spikes last week," | |
1735 | said the low priest. | |
1736 | There was a sound like the flushing of a very old dry lavatory. | |
1737 | The footsteps stopped. The High Priest smiled to himself. | |
1738 | "Right," he said. "See your two pebbles and raise you two pebbles." | |
1739 | The low priest threw down his cards. "Double Onion," he said. | |
1740 | The High Priest looked down suspiciously. | |
1741 | The low priest consulted a scrap of paper. "That's three hundred | |
1742 | thousand, nine hundred and sixty-four pebbles you owe me," he said. | |
1743 | There was the sound of footsteps. The priests exchanged glances. | |
1744 | "Haven't had one for poisoned-dart alley for quite some time," | |
1745 | said the High Priest. | |
1746 | "Five says he makes it", said the low priest. "You're on." | |
1747 | There was a faint clatter of metal points on stone. | |
1748 | "It's a shame to take your pebbles." | |
1749 | There were footsteps again. | |
1750 | ||
1751 | =head2 v5.8.0-RC3 - no epigraph | |
1752 | ||
1753 | L<Announced on 2002-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63234.html> | |
1754 | ||
1755 | =head2 v5.8.0-RC2 - no epigraph | |
1756 | ||
1757 | L<Announced on 2002-06-21 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg62013.html> | |
1758 | ||
1759 | =head2 v5.8.0-RC1 - no epigraph | |
1760 | ||
1761 | L<Announced on 2002-06-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg60317.html> | |
1762 | ||
1763 | =head2 v5.7.3 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man" | |
1764 | ||
1765 | L<Announced on 2002-03-04 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/03/msg53652.html> | |
1766 | ||
1767 | Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. | |
1768 | No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always | |
1769 | got there first, and is waiting for it. | |
1770 | ||
1771 | =head2 v5.7.2 - Terry Pratchett, "Small Gods" | |
1772 | ||
1773 | L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/07/msg40370.html> | |
1774 | ||
1775 | His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools -- | |
1776 | the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans -- and summed up | |
1777 | all three of them in his famous phrase, "You can't trust any | |
1778 | bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing | |
1779 | you can do about it, so let's have a drink." | |
1780 | ||
1781 | =head2 v5.7.1 - Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic" | |
1782 | ||
1783 | L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33851.html> | |
4363636d | 1784 | |
4363636d DG |
1785 | "What happens next?" asked Twoflower. |
1786 | ||
1787 | Hrun screwed a finger in his ear and inspected it absently. | |
1788 | ||
1789 | "Oh,", he said, "I expect in a minute the door will be | |
1790 | flung back and I'll be dragged off to some sort of temple | |
1791 | arena where I'll fight maybe a couple of giant spiders | |
1792 | and an eight-foot slave from the jungles of Klatch and then | |
1793 | I'll rescue some kind of a princess from the altar and then | |
1794 | I'll kill off a few guards or whatever and then this girl | |
1795 | will show me the secret passage out of the place and we'll | |
1796 | liberate a couple of horses and escape with the treasure." | |
1797 | Hrun leaned his head back on his hands and looked at the | |
1798 | ceiling, whistling tunelessly. | |
1799 | ||
1800 | "All that?" said Twoflower. | |
1801 | ||
1802 | "Usually." | |
1803 | ||
c7bed260 Z |
1804 | =head2 v5.7.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Moving Pictures" |
1805 | ||
1806 | L<Announced on 2000-09-02 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/09/msg17730.html> | |
1807 | ||
1808 | The Librarian had seen many weird things in his time, | |
1809 | but that had to be the 57th strangest. | |
1810 | [footnote: he had a tidy mind] | |
1811 | ||
1812 | =head2 v5.6.2 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy" | |
1813 | ||
1814 | L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/deb8cb9ad918716f> | |
1815 | ||
1816 | When great or unexpected events fall out upon the stage of this | |
1817 | sublunary word--the mind of man, which is an inquisitive kind of | |
1818 | a substance, naturally takes a flight, behind the scenes, to see | |
1819 | what is the cause and first spring of them--The search was not | |
1820 | long in this instance. | |
1821 | ||
1822 | =head2 v5.6.2-RC1 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy" | |
1823 | ||
1824 | L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e3d4acc7a8dd3ce5> | |
1825 | ||
1826 | "Pray, my dear", quoth my mother, "have you not forgot to wind up the clock?" | |
1827 | ||
2831a86c | 1828 | =head2 v5.6.1 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", Riddles in the Dark |
4363636d | 1829 | |
2831a86c | 1830 | L<Announced on 2001-04-08 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33823.html> |
4363636d | 1831 | |
2831a86c ZA |
1832 | `What have I got in my pocket?' he said aloud. He was talking to |
1833 | himself, but Gollum thought it was a riddle, and he was frightfully | |
1834 | upset. | |
4363636d | 1835 | |
2831a86c ZA |
1836 | `Not fair! not fair!' he hissed. `It isn't fair, my precious, is it, |
1837 | to ask us what it's got in its nassty little pocketses?' | |
4363636d | 1838 | |
2831a86c ZA |
1839 | Bilbo seeing what had happened and having nothing better to ask |
1840 | stuck to his question, `What have I got in my pocket?' he said | |
1841 | louder. | |
4363636d | 1842 | |
2831a86c ZA |
1843 | `S-s-s-s-s,' hissed Gollum. `It must give us three guesseses, |
1844 | my precious, three guesseses.' | |
4363636d | 1845 | |
2831a86c | 1846 | =head2 v5.6.1-foolish - no epigraph |
4363636d | 1847 | |
2831a86c | 1848 | L<Announced on 2001-08-04 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33421.html> |
3e340399 | 1849 | |
2831a86c | 1850 | =head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL3 - I can't find the announcement |
4363636d | 1851 | |
a4b0381d MS |
1852 | No announcement available. |
1853 | ||
2831a86c | 1854 | =head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL2 - no epigraph |
4363636d | 1855 | |
2831a86c | 1856 | L<Announced on 2001-01-31 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/01/msg29934.html> |
4363636d | 1857 | |
2831a86c | 1858 | =head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL1 - no epigraph |
4363636d | 1859 | |
2831a86c | 1860 | L<Announced on 2000-12-18 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/12/msg27738.html> |
4363636d | 1861 | |
2831a86c | 1862 | =head2 v5.6.0 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", The Last Stage |
a4b0381d | 1863 | |
2831a86c ZA |
1864 | L<Announced on 2000-03-23 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10341.html> |
1865 | ||
1866 | The dragon is withered, | |
1867 | His bones are now crumbled; | |
1868 | His armour is shivered, | |
1869 | His splendour is humbled! | |
1870 | Though sword shall be rusted, | |
1871 | And throne and crown perish | |
1872 | With strength that men trusted | |
1873 | And wealth that they cherish, | |
1874 | Here grass is still growing, | |
1875 | And leaves are a yet swinging, | |
1876 | The white water flowing, | |
1877 | And elves are yet singing | |
1878 | Come! Tra-la-la-lally! | |
1879 | Come back to the valley. | |
1880 | ||
2831a86c ZA |
1881 | =head2 v5.6.0-RC3 - no epigraph |
1882 | ||
1883 | L<Announced on 2000-03-22 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10140.html> | |
4363636d | 1884 | |
c7bed260 Z |
1885 | =head2 v5.005_05-RC1 - no epigraph |
1886 | ||
1887 | L<Announced on 2009-02-16 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/02/msg144227.html> | |
1888 | ||
1889 | =head2 v5.005_04 - no epigraph | |
1890 | ||
1891 | L<Announced on 2004-03-01 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6c240ad0b189cb47> | |
1892 | ||
1893 | =head2 v5.005_04-RC2 - Rudyard Kipling, "The Jungle Book" | |
1894 | ||
1895 | L<Announced on 2004-02-19 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83e5421124a7b49d> | |
1896 | ||
1897 | The monkeys called the place their city, and pretended to despise | |
1898 | the Jungle-People because they lived in the forest. And yet they | |
1899 | never knew what the buildings were made for nor how to use | |
1900 | them. They would sit in circles on the hall of the king's council | |
1901 | chamber, and scratch for fleas and pretend to be men; or they would | |
1902 | run in and out of the roofless houses and collect pieces of plaster | |
1903 | and old bricks in a corner, and forget where they had hidden them, | |
1904 | and fight and cry in scuffling crowds, and then break off to play up | |
1905 | and down the terraces of the king's garden, where they would shake | |
1906 | the rose trees and the oranges in sport to see the fruit and flowers | |
1907 | fall. | |
1908 | ||
1909 | =head2 v5.005_04-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" | |
1910 | ||
1911 | L<Announced on 2004-02-05 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6aaeb6ec699bd116> | |
1912 | ||
1913 | Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had | |
1914 | plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to wonder what was | |
1915 | going to happen next. First, she tried to look down and make out what | |
1916 | she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything; then she looked | |
1917 | at the sides of the well, and noticed that they were filled with | |
1918 | cupboards and book-shelves; here and there she saw maps and pictures | |
1919 | hung upon pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves as she | |
1920 | passed; it was labelled 'ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great | |
1921 | disappointment it was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear | |
1922 | of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as | |
1923 | she fell past it. | |
1924 | ||
1925 | =head2 v1.0_16 - Johan Vromans, extemporarily | |
1926 | ||
1927 | L<Announced on 2003-12-18 by Richard Clamp|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9281dc6194d15940> | |
1928 | ||
4363636d DG |
1929 | =head1 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS |
1930 | ||
0e6b8110 | 1931 | This document was originally compiled based on a list of epigraphs |
4363636d DG |
1932 | on L<Perl Monks|http://perlmonks.org> titled |
1933 | L<Recent Perl Release Announcement|http://perlmonks.org/?node_id=372406> | |
1934 | by ysth. | |
1935 | ||
1936 | =cut | |
3e340399 | 1937 | |
4363636d | 1938 | # vim:tw=72: |