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[perl5.git] / Porting / epigraphs.pod
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3=head1 NAME
4
0e6b8110 5perlepigraphs - list of Perl release epigraphs
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6
7=head1 DESCRIPTION
8
0e6b8110 9Many Perl release announcements included an I<epigraph>, a short excerpt
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10from a literary or other creative work, chosen by the pumpking or release
11manager. This file assembles the known list of epigraph for posterity,
12and also links to the release announcements in mailing list archives.
4363636d 13
de6a5728 14I<Note>: these have also been referred to as I<epigrams>, but the
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15definition of I<epigraph> is closer to the way they have been used.
16Consult your favorite dictionary for details.
17
18=head1 EPIGRAPHS
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20=head2 v5.26.0-RC2 - Richard Condon, The Manchurian Candidate
21
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22L<Announced on 2017-05-23 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/05/msg244511.html>
23
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24 Amateur psychiatric prognosis can be fascinating when there is
25 absolutely nothing else to do.
26
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27=head2 v5.26.0-RC1 - Thomas Paine, Common Sense
28
29L<Announced on 2017-05-11 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/05/msg244337.html>
30
31 A long habit of not thinking a thing WRONG, gives it a superficial
32 appearance of being RIGHT, and raises at first a formidable outcry in
33 defense of custom. But the tumult soon subsides. Time makes more
34 converts than reason.
35
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36=head2 v5.25.12 - Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five
37
78d5fac0 38L<Announced on 2017-04-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/04/msg244146.html>
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39
40 I have told my sons that they are not under any circumstances to take
41 part in massacres, and that the news of massacres of enemies is not
42 to fill them with satisfaction or glee.
43
44 I have also told them not to work for companies which make massacre
45 machinery, and to express contempt for people who think we need
46 machinery like that.
47
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48=head2 v5.25.11 - Daniel Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow
49
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50L<Announced on 2017-03-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/03/msg243624.html>
51
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52 Subjective confidence in a judgment is not a reasoned evaluation of
53 the probability that this judgment is correct. Confidence is a
54 feeling, which reflects the coherence of the information and the
55 cognitive ease of processing it. It is wise to take admissions of
56 uncertainty seriously, but declarations of high confidence mainly
57 tell you that an individual has constructed a coherent story in his
58 mind, not necessarily that the story is true.
59
fd4b847f 60=head2 v5.25.10 - Erich Fried, 1968
61
62L<Announced on 2017-02-20 by Renee Bäcker|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/02/msg243173.html>
63
64 He who wants the world to remain as it is
65 doesn't want it to remain.
66
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67=head2 v5.25.9 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie-the-Pooh", 1926
68
69L<Announced on 2017-01-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/01/msg242405.html>
70
71 Pooh always liked a little something at eleven o'clock in the
72 morning, and he was very glad to see Rabbit getting out the plates
73 and mugs; and when Rabbit said, "Honey or condensed milk with
74 your bread?" he was so excited that he said, "Both," and then,
75 so as not to seem greedy, he added, "But don't bother about the
76 bread, please."
77
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78=head2 v5.25.8 - Langston Hughes, So long
79
7e3e9d6d 80L<Announced on 2016-12-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/12/msg241739.html>
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81
82 So long
83 is in the song
84 and it's in the way you're gone
85 but it's like a foreign language
86 in my mind
87 and maybe was I blind
88 I could not see
89 and would not know
90 you're gone so long
91 so long.
92
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93=head2 v5.25.7 - J.R.R. Tolkien, "The Silmarillion"
94
95L<Announced on 2016-11-20 by Chad 'Exodist' Granum|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/11/msg241120.html>
96
97 Of Beren and Lúthien
98
99 Among the tales of sorrow and of ruin that come down to us from the darkness of
100 those days there are yet some in which amid weeping there is joy and under the
101 shadow of death light that endures. And of these histories most fair still in
102 the ears of the Elves is the tale of Beren and Lúthien. Of their lives was made
103 the Lay of Leithian, Release from Bondage, which is the longest save one of the
104 songs concerning the world of old; but here is told in fewer words and without
105 song.
106
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107=head2 v5.25.6 - Alan Warner, "The Sopranos"
108
109L<Announced on 2016-10-10 by Aaron Crane|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/10/msg240406.html>
110
111 I'm up on all the pop trivia, says the guy with the stud in his tongue.
112 Are you?
113 Yes. Do you know who he lead singer of Echo and the Bunnymen is?
114 Let me guess, is he called Echo?
115 Good guess but no, anyway when they played Glastonbury it was so
116 muddy he had two roadies to hold up a binliner on each of his legs so
117 they wouldn't get covered in mud.
118 That's what being rich and famous is all about, having someone
119 else hold up your binliners on each leg when you're wandering across
120 a sea of shite.
121 Do you know what Sammy Davis Junior said being black and famous in
122 America meant?
123 No.
124 He said being black and famous in America meant he could be
125 refused entry to exclusive clubs and restaurants that other people
126 could only ever dream of going to. Do you know Michael Stipe likes to
127 send his remote control toy cars onto stage while his support band are
128 playing to freak them out?
129 Who's Michael Stipe?
130 You're not really a pop trivia person, are you, Kylah?
131 No, I'm not, Stephen.
132
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133=head2 v5.25.5 - Philip K. Dick, VALIS
134
135L<Announced on 2016-09-20 by Stevan Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/09/msg239887.html>
136
137 We hypostatize information into objects. Rearrangement of objects is
138 change in the content of the information; the message has changed.
139 This is a language which we have lost the ability to read. We ourselves
140 are a part of this language; changes in us are changes in the content
141 of the information. We ourselves are information-rich; information
142 enters us, is processed and is then projected outward once more, now
143 in an altered form. We are not aware that we are doing this, that in
144 fact this is all we are doing
145
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146=head2 v5.25.4 - Terry Pratchett, "Truckers"
147
148L<Announced on 2016-08-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/08/msg239191.html>
149
150 Concerning Nomes and Time
151
152 Nomes are small. On the whole, small creatures don't live for a long
153 time. But perhaps they do live fast.
154
155 Let me explain.
156
157 One of the shortest-lived creatures on the planet Earth is the adult
158 common mayfly. It lasts for one day. The longest-living things are
159 bristlecone pine trees, at 4,700 years and still counting.
160
161 This may seem tough on the mayflies. But the important thing is not
162 how long your life is, but how long it seems.
163
164 To a mayfly, a single hour may last as long as a century. Perhaps
165 old mayflies sit around complaining about how life this minute isn't a
166 patch on the good old minutes of long ago, when the world was
167 young and the sun seemed so much brighter and larvae showed you a
168 bit of respect. Whereas the trees, which are not famous to their
169 quick reactions, may just have time to notice the way the sky keeps
170 flickering before the dry rot and woodworm set in.
171
172 It's all a sort of relativity. The faster you live, the more time
173 stretches out. To a nome, a year lasts as long as ten years does to a
174 human. Remember it. Don't let it concern you. They don't. They don't
175 even know.
176
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177=head2 v5.25.3 - Edward Lear, ed. Vivien Noakes, "The Complete Nonsense and Other Verse": The Dong with a Luminous Nose
178
179L<Announced on 2016-07-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/07/msg238158.html>
180
181 When awful darkness and silence reign
182 Over the great Gromboolian plain,
183 Through the long, long wintry nights; -
184 When the angry breakers roar
185 As they beat on the rocky shore; -
186 When Storm-clouds brood on the towering heights
187 Of the Hills of the Chankly Bore: -
188
189 Then, through the vast and gloomy dark,
190 There moves what seems a fiery spark,
191 A lonely spark with silvery rays
192 Piercing the coal-black night, -
193 A Meteor strange and bright: -
194 Hither and thither the vision strays,
195 A single lurid light.
196
197 Slowly it wanders, - pauses, - creeps, -
198 Anon it sparkles, - flashes and leaps;
199 And ever as onward it gleaming goes
200 A light on the Bong-tree stems it throws.
201 And those who watch at that midnight hour
202 From Hall or Terrace, or lofty Tower,
203 Cry, as the wild light passes along, -
204 'The Dong! - the Dong!
205 The wandering Dong through the forest goes!
206 The Dong! the Dong!
207 The Dong with a luminous Nose!'
208
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209=head2 v5.25.2 - Dan le Sac Vs Scroobius Pip "Waiting For The Beat To Kick In"
210
211L<Announced on 2016-06-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/06/msg237274.html>
212
213 Waiting for the beat to kick in
214 But it never does
215 Waiting for my feet to grow wings
216 That lift me above
217 All of these tiresome things
218 That we know and love
219 Waiting for the beat to kick in
220 But it never does
221
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222=head2 v5.25.1 - Eli Pariser, "The Filter Bubble"
223
5f602b3b 224L<Announced on 2016-05-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/05/msg236566.html>
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225
226Imagine that you're a smart high school student on the low end of the social
227totem pole. You're alienated from adult authority, but unlike many teenagers,
228you're also alienated from the power structures of your peers -- an existence
229that can feel lonely and peripheral. Systems and equations are intuitive, but
230people aren't -- social signals are confusing and messy, difficult to interpret.
231
232Then you discover code. You may be powerless at the lunch table, but code
233gives you power over an infinitely malleable world and opens the door to a
234symbolic system that's perfectly clear and ordered. The jostling for position
235and status fades away. The nagging parental voices disappear. There's just a
236clean, white page for you to fill, an opportunity to build a better place, a
237home, from the ground up.
238
239No wonder you're a geek.
240
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241=head2 v5.25.0 - Robert Frost, "The Trial by Existence"
242
243L<Announced on 2016-05-09 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/05/msg236244.html>
244
245 Even the bravest that are slain
246 Shall not dissemble their surprise
247 On waking to find valor reign,
248 Even as on earth, in paradise;
249 And where they sought without the sword
250 Wide fields of asphodel fore’er,
251 To find that the utmost reward
252 Of daring should be still to dare.
253
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254=head2 v5.24.1 - Charles Dodgson [as "Lewis Carroll"], "The Hunting of the Snark", Fit 4: The Hunting
255
256L<Announced on 2017-01-14 by Steve Hay|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/01/msg242259.html>
257
258 The Bellman looked uffish, and wrinkled his brow.
259 'If only you'd spoken before!
260 It's excessively awkward to mention it now,
261 With the Snark, so to speak, at the door!
262
263 'We should all of us grieve, as you well may believe,
264 If you never were met with again -
265 But surely, my man, when the voyage began,
266 You might have suggested it then?
267
268 'It's excessively awkward to mention it now -
269 As I think I've already remarked.'
270 And the man they called 'Hi!' replied, with a sigh,
271 'I informed you the day we embarked.
272
273 'You may charge me with murder - or want of sense -
274 (We are all of us weak at times):
275 But the slightest approach to a false pretence
276 Was never among my crimes!
277
278 'I said it in Hebrew - I said it in Dutch -
279 I said it in German and Greek:
280 But I wholly forgot (and it vexes me much)
281 That English is what you speak!'
282
283 ''Tis a pitiful tale,' said the Bellman, whose face
284 Had grown longer at every word:
285 'But, now that you've stated the whole of your case,
286 More debate would be simply absurd.
287
288 'The rest of my speech' (he exclaimed to his men)
289 'You shall hear when I've leisure to speak it.
290 But the Snark is at hand, let me tell you again!
291 'Tis your glorious duty to seek it!
292
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293=head2 v5.24.1-RC5 - John Milton, ed. Gordon Campbell, "Paradise Regained", Book IV
294
295L<Announced on 2017-01-02 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/01/msg242016.html>
296
297 Thus passed the night so foul, till Morning fair
298 Came forth with pilgrim steps, in amice grey;
299 Who with her radiant finger stilled the roar
300 Of thunder, chased the clouds, and laid the winds,
301 And grisly spectres, which the fiend had raised
302 To tempt the Son of God with terrors dire.
303 And now the sun with more effectual beams
304 Had cheered the face of earth, and dried the wet
305 From drooping plant, or dropping tree; the birds,
306 Who all things now behold more fresh and green,
307 After a night of storm so ruinous,
308 Cleared up their choicest notes in bush and spray,
309 To gratulate the sweet return of morn.
310
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311=head2 v5.24.1-RC4 - John Milton, ed. Gordon Campbell, "Paradise Lost", Book II
312
313L<Announced on 2016-10-12 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/10/msg240224.html>
314
315 Before the gates there sat
316 On either side a formidable shape;
317 The one seemed woman to the waste, and fair,
318 But ended foul in many a scaly fold,
319 Voluminous and vast -- a serpent armed
320 With mortal sting; about her middle round
321 A cry of hell hounds never ceasing barked
322 With wide Cerberean mouths full loud, and rung
323 A hideous peal; yet, when they list, would creep,
324 If aught disturbed their noise, into her womb,
325 And kennel there; yet there still barked and howled
326 Within unseen. Far less abhorred than these
327 Vexed Scylla, bathing in the sea that parts
328 Calabria from the hoarse Trinacrian shore;
329 Nor uglier follow the night-hag, when, called
330 In secret, riding through the air she comes,
331 Lured with the smell of infant blood, to dance
332 With Lapland witches, while the labouring moon
333 Eclipses at their charms. The other shape --
334 If shape it might be called that shape had none
335 Distinguishable in member, joint, or limb;
336 Or substance might be called that shadow seemed,
337 For each seemed either -- black it stood as night,
338 Fierce as ten Furies, terrible as hell,
339 And shook a dreadful dart: what seemed his head
340 The likeness of a kingly crown had on.
341 Satan was now at hand, and from his seat
342 The monster moving onward came as fast
343 With horrid strides; hell trembled as he strode.
344
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345=head2 v5.24.1-RC3 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers and Barbara Reynolds, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica III: Paradise, Canto XXIII
346
347L<Announced on 2016-08-11 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/08/msg238909.html>
348
349 A bird within the bower of her delight,
350 Quiet upon the nest with her sweet brood
351 Throughout the dark concealment of the night,
352
353 Anxious to look on them and gather food -
354 No weary task for her, for as at play
355 Blithely she toils to seek her fledglings' good -
356
357 Before the time, upon the topmost spray
358 Eager awaits the sun and on the East
359 Fixes her wakeful eye till break of day.
360
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361=head2 v5.24.1-RC2 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica II: Purgatory, Canto X
362
363L<Announced on 2016-07-25 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/07/msg238269.html>
364
365 When we had crossed the threshold of that gate
366 Which the soul's evil loves put out of use,
367 Because they make the crooked path seem straight,
368
369 I heard its closing clang ring clamorous,
370 And had I then turned back my eyes to it
371 How could my fault have found the least excuse?
372
373 We had to climb now through a rocky slit
374 Which ran from side to side in many a swerve,
375 As runs the wave in onset and retreat.
376
377 "Now here," the master said, "we must observe
378 Some little caution, hugging now this wall,
379 Now that, upon the far side of the curve."
380
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381=head2 v5.24.1-RC1 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica I: Hell, Canto XX
382
383L<Announced on 2016-07-17 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/07/msg238072.html>
384
385 New punishments behoves me sing in this
386 Twentieth canto of my first canticle,
387 Which tells of spirits sunk in the Abyss.
388
389 I now stood ready to observe the full
390 Extent of the new chasm thus laid bare,
391 Drenched as it was in tears most miserable.
392
393 Through the round vale I saw folk drawing near,
394 Weeping and silent, and at such slow pace
395 As Litany processions keep, up here.
396
397 And presently, when I had dropped my gaze
398 Lower than the head, I saw them strangely wried
399 'Twixt collar-bone and chin, so that the face
400
401 Of each was turned towards his own backside,
402 And backwards must they needs creep with their feet,
403 All power of looking forward being denied.
404
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405=head2 v5.24.0 - Robert Frost, "The Black Cottage"
406
407L<Announced on 2016-05-09 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/05/msg236242.html>
408
409 As I sit here, and oftentimes, I wish
410 I could be monarch of a desert land
411 I could devote and dedicate forever
412 To the truths we keep coming back and back to.
413 So desert it would have to be, so walled
414 By mountain ranges half in summer snow,
415 No one would covet it or think it worth
416 The pains of conquering to force change on.
417 Scattered oases where men dwelt, but mostly
418 Sand dunes held loosely in tamarisk
419 Blown over and over themselves in idleness.
420 Sand grains should sugar in the natal dew
421 The babe born to the desert, the sand storm
422 Retard mid-waste my cowering caravans—
423
424 “There are bees in this wall.” He struck the clapboards,
425 Fierce heads looked out; small bodies pivoted.
426 We rose to go. Sunset blazed on the windows.
427
428=head2 v5.24.0-RC5 - The Mountain Goats, "No Children"
429
430L<Announced on 2016-05-04 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/05/msg236198.html>
431
432 And I hope when you think of me years down the line
433 You can't find one good thing to say
434 And I'd hope that if I found the strength to walk out
435 You'd stay the hell out of my way
436
437 I am drowning, there is no sign of land
438 You are coming down with me, hand in unlovable hand
439
440=head2 v5.24.0-RC4 - The Joker in "The Killing Joke"
441
442L<Announced on 2016-05-02 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/05/msg236145.html>
443
444"See, there were these two guys in a lunatic asylum…"
445
446=head2 v5.24.0-RC3 - Jesse Vincent
447
448L<Announced on 2016-04-27 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/04/msg236066.html>
449
450The Great Pumpkin is a Santa-Claus like figure. He does bring toys like
451Santa. But unlike Santa, who gives away toys because it's his job, he
452gives away toys because it's the right thing to do.
453
454=head2 v5.24.0-RC2 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
455
456L<Announced on 2016-04-23 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/04/msg235999.html>
457
458“How do you feel, Yossarian?”
459
460“Fine. No, I’m very frightened.”
461
462“That’s good,” said Major Danby. “It proves you’re still alive. It won’t
463be fun.”
464
465Yossarian started out. “Yes it will.”
466
467“I mean it, Yossarian. You’ll have to keep on your toes every minute of
468every day. They’ll bend heaven and earth to catch you.”
469
470“I’ll keep on my toes every minute.”
471
472“You’ll have to jump.”
473
474“I’ll jump.”
475
476“Jump!” Major Danby cried.
477
478Yossarian jumped.
479
480Nately’s [girl] was hiding just outside the door. The knife came down,
481missing him by inches, and he took off.
482
483=head2 v5.24.0-RC1 - Robert Frost, "The Census-Taker"
484
485L<Announced on 2016-04-14 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/04/msg235807.html>
486
487 Nothing was left to do that I could see
488 Unless to find that there was no one there
489 And declare to the cliffs too far for echo,
490 "The place is desert, and let whoso lurks
491 In silence, if in this he is aggrieved,
492 Break silence now or be forever silent.
493 Let him say why it should not be declared so."
494 The melancholy of having to count souls
495 Where they grow fewer and fewer every year
496 Is extreme where they shrink to none at all.
497 It must be I want life to go on living.
498
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499=head2 v5.23.9 - Tom Kitchin, "from nature to plate"
500
501L<Announced on 2016-03-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/03/msg235251.html>
502
503Spring
504
505Spring is the proper beginning of my kitchen and a season that I
506look forward to with great anticipation. By the time spring arrives
507I am desperate to welcome all the spring produce into my kitchen
508and I long to work with fresh green vegetables again. As much as I
509love root vegetables, such as celeriac and parsnips, and the heaver
510meat and game dishes, I'm ready to leave those behind with winter
511and begin a new adventure.
512
513Somehow spring always gives me a little bit of bounce in my feet
514-- I feel like I want to kick off my shoes and dance around in my
515kitchen. Not that I do, of course, but I feel lighter somehow. My
516adrenalin kicks in with spring and so does the level of excitement,
517as I think about all the produce that is about to come in.
518
519The moment spring arrives I'm eager to cook peas, broad beans, green
520asparagus and other fresh vegetables! I want to create lighter,
521brighter dishes and I can't wait to get my hands on the first greens
522and the first morels, not to mention the first wild Scottish salmon.
523Thanks to my network of trusted suppliers, I always get to first
524produce of the season delivered to my restaurant as soon as it is
525possible. I want my customers to experience and understand the
526beauty of locally grown produce and to try things the minute they
527are available so they can taste how incredibly fresh the ingredients
528are. I also want them to understand the relationship between
529seasonality and flavours. One of the most important things to
530remember is to allow the seasons to inspire your dishes and help
531you make natural matches. Wild spring herbs, such as sorrel, sweet
532cicely and wild garlic, as well as spring salad leaves and green
533lettuce served with wild salmon, wild sea trout, lamb or rabbit are
534marriages made in heaven.
535
536
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537=head2 v5.23.8 - Patrick Rothfuss, "The Wise Man's Fear (The Kingkiller's Chronicle: Day Two)"
538
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539L<Announced on 2016-02-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/02/msg234535.html>
540
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541Denna, on the other hand, had never been trained. She knew nothing
542of shortcuts. You'd think she'd be forced to wander the city, lost and
543helpless, trapped in a twisting maze of mortared stone.
544
545But instead, she simply walked throught the walls. She didn't know
546any better. Nobody had ever told her she couldn't. Because of this,
547she moved through the city like some faerie creature. She walked roads
548no one else could see, and it made her music wild and strange and
549free.
550
da44b70c 551=head2 v5.23.7 - William Gibson, "Neuromancer"
9c92e371 552
f43a4a46 553L<Announced on 2016-01-20 by Stevan Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/01/msg233856.html>
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SL
554
555A year here and he still dreamed of cyberspace, hope fading
556nightly. All the speed he took, all the turns he'd taken and
557the corners he cut in Night City, and he'd still see the matrix
558in his dreams, bright lattices of logic unfolding across that
559colourless void...The Sprawl was a long, strange way home now
560over the Pacific, and he was no Console Man, no cyberspace
561cowboy. Just another hustler, trying to make it through. But
562the dreams came on in the Japanese night like livewire voodoo,
563and he'd cry for it, cry in his sleep, and wake alone in the
564dark, curled in his capsule in some coffin hotel, hands clawed
565into the bedslab, temper foam bunched between his fingers,
566trying to reach the console that wasn't there.
567
411a38f0
DG
568=head2 v5.23.6 - 5.23 Episode VII
569
f43a4a46
SH
570L<Announced on 2015-12-21 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/12/msg233475.html>
571
411a38f0
DG
572 A long time ago in microseconds, in a galaxy not very far away...
573
574 5.23 Episode VII
575 THE FUZZ AWAKENS
576
577 It is a period of
578 unrest as separatists
579 announce their intentions
580 to fork PERL and return the
581 galaxy to speed and stability.
582
583 Chancellor Rik Hoolian struggles
584 to hold together the remains of the
585 once mighty Republic against a tide of
586 incivility and the depredations of a new
587 foe, the FUZZ RAIDERS.
588
589 Meanwhile, after 15 years of preparation and
590 high expectations, Supreme Leader Toady prepares
591 to unleash a devastating new weapon, PERL SIXDOTOH,
592 that could splinter the Republic forever and usher in
593 a new Empire of gradual typing....
594
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A
595=head2 v5.23.5 - utastro!nather (Ed Nather), "The Story of Mel", in net.jokes, May 21, 1983.
596
597L<Announced on 2015-11-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/11/msg232758.html>
598
599After Mel had left the company for greener pa$ture$, the Big Boss asked
600me to look at the code and see if I could find the test and reverse it.
601Somewhat reluctantly, I agreed to look. Tracking Mel's code was a real
602adventure.
603
604I have often felt that programming is an art form, whose real value can
605only be appreciated by another versed in the same arcane art; there are
606lovely gems and brilliant coups hidden from human view and admiration,
607sometimes forever, by the very nature of the process. You can learn a
608lot about an individual just by reading through his code, even in
609hexadecimal. Mel was, I think, an unsung genius.
610
611Perhaps my greatest shock came when I found an innocent loop that had
612no test in it. No test. None. Common sense said it had to be a closed
613loop, where the program would circle, forever, endlessly. Program
614control passed right through it, however, and safely out the other side.
615It took me two weeks to figure it out.
616
617The RPC-4000 computer had a really modern facility called an index
618register. It allowed the programmer to write a program loop that used
619an indexed instruction inside; each time through, the number in the
620index register was added to the address of that instruction, so it
621would refer to the next datum in a series. He had only to increment
622the index register each time through. Mel never used it.
623
624Instead, he would pull the instruction into a machine register, add one
625to its address, and store it back. He would then execute the modified
626instruction right from the register. The loop was written so this
627additional execution time was taken into account -- just as this
628instruction finished, the next one was right under the drum's read head,
629ready to go. But the loop had no test in it.
630
631The vital clue came when I noticed the index register bit, the bit that
632lay between the address and the operation code in the instruction word,
633was turned on -- yet Mel never used the index register, leaving it zero
634all the time. When the light went on it nearly blinded me.
635
636He had located the data he was working on near the top of memory -- the
637largest locations the instructions could address -- so, after the last
638datum was handled, incrementing the instruction address would make it
639overflow. The carry would add one to the operation code, changing it to
640the next one in the instruction set: a jump instruction. Sure enough,
641the next program instruction was in address location zero, and the
642program went happily on its way.
643
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SH
644=head2 v5.23.4 - Denis Diderot, trans. David Coward, "Jacques the Fatalist"
645
646L<Announced on 2015-10-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/10/msg232040.html>
647
648Well, everybody's got a dog. The prime minister is the king's dog. The
649first secretary is the prime minister's dog. A wife is a husband's dog,
650or a husband is a wife's dog. Favourite is Madame So-and-so's dog and
651Thibaut is the man on the corner's dog. When my Master tells me to talk
652when I'd prefer not to, which to be honest doesn't happen very often,
653when he tells me to shut up when I feel like talking, which I find very
654difficult, when he asks me to tell the story of my love-life and then
655keeps interrupting, what am I if not his dog? Weak men are the dogs of
656strong men.
657
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PM
658=head2 v5.23.3 - Oliver Wendell Holmes, "The Deacon’s Masterpiece or The Wonderful 'One-Hoss Shay': A Logical Story"
659
660L<Announced on 2015-09-20 by Peter Martini|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/09/msg231173.html>
661
662 Little of of all we value here
663 Wakes on the morn of its hundredth year
664 Without both feeling and looking queer.
665 In fact, there’s nothing that keeps its youth,
666 So far as I know, but a tree and truth.
667 (This is a moral that runs at large;
668 Take it. — You’re welcome. — No extra charge.)
669
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MH
670=head2 v5.23.2 - Blind Guardian, "Skalds and Shadows"
671
4442630f 672L<Announced on 2015-08-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/08/msg230298.html>
6687d205
MH
673
674 Would you believe in a night like this
675 A night like this, when visions come true
676 Would you believe in a tale like this
677 A lay of bliss, praise in the old lore
678 Come to the blazing fire and
679
680 See me in the shadows
681 See me in the shadows
682 Songs I will sing
683 Of runes and rings
684 Just hand me my harp
685 This night turns into myth
686 Nothing seems real
687 You soon will feel
688 The world we live in is another skald's
689 Dream in the shadows
690 Dream in the shadows
691
692 Do you believe there is sense in it
693 Is it truth or myth?
694 They´re one in my rhymes
695 Nobody knows the meaning behind
696 The weaver's line
697 Well nobody else but the Norns can
698 See through the blazing fires of time and
699 All things will proceed as the
700 Child of the hallowed
701 Will speak to you now
702
703 See me in the shadows
704 See me in the shadows
705 Songs I will sing of tribes and kings
706 The carrion bird and the hall of the slain
707 Nothing seems real
708 You soon will feel
709 The world we live in is another skald´s
710 Dream in the shadows
711 Dream in the shadows
712
713 Do not fear for my reason
714 There's nothing to hide
715 How bitter your treason
716 How bitter the lie
717 Remember the runes and remember the light
718 All I ever want is to be at your side
719 We'll gladden the raven now I will
720 Run through the blazing fires
721 That's my choice
722 Cause things shall proceed as foreseen
723
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MH
724=head2 v5.23.1 - Elizabeth Haydon, "The Assassin King"
725
726L<Announced on 2015-07-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/07/msg229413.html>
727
728 I was born beneath this willow,
729 Where my sire the earth did farm
730 Had the green grass as my pillow
731 The east wind as a blanket warm.
732
733 But away! away! called the wind from the west
734 And in answer I did run
735 Seeking glory and adventure
736 Promised by the rising sun.
737
738 I found love beneath this willow,
739 As true a love as life could hold,
740 Pledged my heart and swore my fealty
741 Sealed with a kiss and a band of gold.
742
743 But to arms! to arms! called the wind from the west
744 In faithful answer I did run
745 Marching forth for king and country
746 In battles 'neath the midday sun.
747
748 Oft I dreamt of that fair willow
749 As the seven seas I plied
750 And the girl who I left waiting
751 Longing to be at her side.
752
753 But about! about! called the wind from the west
754 As once again my ship did run
755 Down the coast, about the wide world
756 Flying sails in the setting sun.
757
758 Now I lie beneath the willow
759 Now at last no more to roam,
760 My bride and earth so tightly hold me
761 In their arms I'm finally home.
762
763 While away! away! calls the wind from the west
764 Beyond the grave my spirit, free
765 Will chase the sun into the morning
766 Beyond the sky, beyond the sea.
767
da44b70c 768=head2 v5.23.0 - Bob Dylan, "Maggie's Farm"
904c4cac
MH
769
770L<Announced on 2015-06-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/06/msg228807.html>
771
772 I ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more
773 I ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more
774 Well, I try my best
775 To be just like I am
776 But everybody wants you
777 To be just like them
778 They sing while you slave and I just get bored
779 I ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more
780
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SH
781=head2 v5.22.3 - Charles Dodgson [as "Lewis Carroll"], "Phantasmagoria", Canto 6: Discomfyture
782
783L<Announced on 2017-01-14 by Steve Hay|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/01/msg242258.html>
784
785 As one who strives a hill to climb,
786 Who never climbed before:
787 Who finds it, in a little time,
788 Grow every moment less sublime,
789 And votes the thing a bore:
790
791 Yet, having once begun to try,
792 Dares not desert his quest,
793 But, climbing, ever keeps his eye
794 On one small hut against the sky
795 Wherein he hopes to rest:
796
797 Who climbs till nerve and force are spent,
798 With many a puff and pant:
799 Who still, as rises the ascent,
800 In language grows more violent,
801 Although in breath more scant:
802
803 Who, climbing, gains at length the place
804 That crowns the upward track:
805 And, entering with unsteady pace,
806 Receives a buffet in the face
807 That lands him on his back:
808
809 And feels himself, like one in sleep,
810 Glide swiftly down again,
811 A helpless weight, from steep to steep,
812 Till, with a headlong giddy sweep,
813 He drops upon the plain -
814
815 So I, that had resolved to bring
816 Conviction to a ghost,
817 And found it quite a different thing
818 From any human arguing,
819 Yet dared not quit my post.
820
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SH
821=head2 v5.22.3-RC5 - John Milton, ed. Gordon Campbell, "Paradise Regained", Book II
822
823L<Announced on 2017-01-02 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/01/msg242017.html>
824
825 Thus wore out night; and now the herald lark
826 Left his ground-nest, high towering to descry
827 The Morn's approach, and greet her with his song;
828 As lightly from his grassy couch up rose
829 Our Saviour, and found all was but a dream;
830 Fasting he went to sleep, and fasting waked.
831 Up to a hill anon his steps he reared,
832 From whose high top to ken the prospect round,
833 If cottage were in view, sheep-cote, or herd;
834 But cottage, herd, or sheep-cote, none he saw --
835 Only in a bottom saw a pleasant grove,
836 With chant of tuneful birds resounding loud;
837 Thither he bent his way, determined there
838 To rest at noon, and entered soon the shade,
839 High-roofed and walks beneath, and alleys brown,
840 That opened in the midst a woody scene;
841 Nature's own work it seemed (Nature taught Art),
842 And, to a superstitious eye, the haunt
843 Of wood-gods and wood-nymphs.
844
8c805412
SH
845=head2 v5.22.3-RC4 - John Milton, ed. Gordon Campbell, "Paradise Lost", Book II
846
847L<Announced on 2016-10-12 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/10/msg240223.html>
848
849 Far off from these, a slow and silent stream,
850 Lethe, the river of oblivion, rolls
851 Her watery labyrinth, whereof who drinks
852 Forthwith his former state and being forgets --
853 Forgets both joy and grief, pleasure and pain.
854 Beyond this flood a frozen continent
855 Lies dark and wild, beat with perpetual storms
856 Of Whirlwind and dire hail, which on firm land
857 Thaws not, but gathers heap, and ruin seems
858 Of ancient pile; all else deep snow and ice,
859 A gulf profound as that Serbonian bog
860 Betwixt Damiata and Mount Casius old,
861 Where armies whole have sunk: the parching air
862 Burns frore, and cold performs the effect of fire.
863 Thither, by harpy-footed Furies haled,
864 At certain revolutions all the damned
865 Are brought; and feel by turns the bitter change
866 Of fierce extremes, extremes by change more fierce,
867 From beds of raging fire to starve in ice
868 Their soft ethereal warmth, and there to pine
869 Immovable, infixed, and frozen round
870 Periods of time -- thence hurried back to fire.
871 They ferry over this Lethean sound
872 Both to and fro, their sorrow to augment,
873 And wish and struggle, as they pass, to reach
874 The tempting stream, with one small drop to lose
875 In sweet forgetfulness all pain and woe,
876 All in one moment, and so near the brink;
877 But fate withstands, and, to oppose the attempt,
878 Medusa with Gorgonian terror guards
879 The ford, and of itself the water flies
880 All taste of living wight, as once it fled
881 The lip of Tantalus.
882
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SH
883=head2 v5.22.3-RC3 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers and Barbara Reynolds, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica III: Paradise, Canto IV
884
885L<Announced on 2016-08-11 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/08/msg238908.html>
886
887 Between two dishes, equally attractive
888 And near to him, a free man, I suppose,
889 Would starve to death before his teeth got active;
890
891 So would a lamb 'twixt two fierce wolfish foes,
892 Fearing the fangs both ways, not stir a foot;
893 So would a deerhound halt between two does;
894
895 So I can't blame myself for standing mute,
896 Nor praise myself: for I must needs so do,
897 Suspended 'twixt two doubts, alike acute.
898
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SH
899=head2 v5.22.3-RC2 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica II: Purgatory, Canto I
900
901L<Announced on 2016-07-25 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/07/msg238270.html>
902
903 For better waters heading with the wind
904 My ship of genius now shakes out her sail
905 And leaves that ocean of despair behind;
906
907 For to the second realm I tune my tale,
908 Where human spirits purge themselves, and train
909 To leap up into joy celestial.
910
911 Now from the grave wake poetry again,
912 O sacred Muses I have served so long!
913 Now let Calliope uplift her strain
914
915 And lift my voice up on the mighty song
916 That smote the miserable Magpies nine
917 Out of all hope of pardon for their wrong!
918
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SH
919=head2 v5.22.3-RC1 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica I: Hell, Canto XII
920
921L<Announced on 2016-07-17 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/07/msg238071.html>
922
923 The place we came to, to descend the brink from,
924 Was sheer crag; and there was a Thing there - making,
925 All told, a prospect any eye would shrink from.
926
927 Like the great landslide that rushed downward, shaking
928 The bank of Adige on this side Trent,
929 (Whether through faulty shoring or the earth's quaking)
930
931 So that the rock, down from the summit rent
932 Far as the plain, lies strewn, and one might crawl
933 From top to bottom by that unsure descent,
934
935 Such was the precipice; and there we spied,
936 Topping the cleft that split the rocky wall,
937 That which was wombed in the false heifer's side,
938
939 The infamy of Crete, stretched out a-sprawl;
940 And seeing us, he gnawed himself, like one
941 Inly devoured with spite and burning gall.
942
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SH
943=head2 v5.22.2 - Gaston Leroux, trans. Mireille Ribière, "The Phantom of the Opera"
944
945L<Announced on 2016-04-29 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/04/msg236120.html>
946
947A silence; and then: 'If, in just two minutes' time by my watch--and a
948splendid watch it is--you have not turned the scorpion, mademoiselle, I
949shall turn the grasshopper... and the grasshopper, remember, _leaps
950straight up into the air!_'
951The silence that ensued was terrifying, worse than any we had
952experienced before. I knew that when Erik spoke with that quiet,
953gentle, slightly weary voice, it meant that he had reached the end of
954his tether: that he was capable of the most abominable crimes or the
955most selfless devotion; that the slightest irritation might unleash a
956storm.
957Realizing that our fate was out of our hands, the Viscount fell to his
958knees and prayed. As for me, I pressed both hands to my chest, for my
959heart was pounding so fiercely that I thought it would burst. We were
960intensely aware of the excruciating dilemma Christine Daaé faced in
961those final seconds. We understood why she hesitated to turn the
962scorpion. What if the scorpion, rather than the grasshopper, were to
963set off the explosion? What if Erik was simply intent on destroying
964everything, regardless?
965At last he spoke: 'The two minutes are up,' he said in a soft, angelic
966voice. 'Goodbye, mademoiselle. Off you go, little grasshopper!'
967
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SH
968=head2 v5.22.2-RC1 - Gaston Leroux, trans. Mireille Ribière, "The Phantom of the Opera"
969
970L<Announced on 2016-04-10 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/04/msg235732.html>
971
972This annual ball was quite a magnificent affair. It was given some time
973before Shrovetide to celebrate the birthday of a famous illustrator
974whose pencil had immortalized, in the style of Gavarni, the extravagant
975carnival parade down La Courtille. As such, the ball was an altogether
976merrier, noisier and more Bohemian occasion than was usual for a masked
977ball. Many artists had arranged to meet there; they arrived with an
978entourage of models and pupils, who, by midnight, had become quite
979boisterous.
980Raoul climbed the grand staircase at five minutes to midnight. He did
981not linger to admire the many-coloured costumes on display all the way
982up the marble steps of one of the most luxurious settings in the world;
983nor did he allow himself to be drawn into the facetious conversation of
984masked guests. He simply ignored all the jesting remarks, and shook off
985the attentions of several all too merry couples.
986Crossing the big crush-room and escaping from the dancers' farandole
987that had encircled him awhile, he at last entered the salon mentioned by
988Christine in her letter. The small room was crammed with people either
989on their way to supper at the restaurant in the Rotunda or back from
990raising a glass of champagne.
991In the midst of the gay and lively hubbub, Raoul thought that, for their
992mysterious assignation, Christine must have preferred this crowd to some
993lonely corner.
994He leaned against a door-jamb and waited. He did not have to wait long;
995a black domino passed him and deftly touched his hand. He understood
996that it was Christine and followed her.
997'Is that you, Christine?' he murmured, barely moving his slips.
998The black domino promptly looked back and raised her finger to her lips,
999no doubt to caution him against uttering her name again. Raoul followed
1000on in silence.
1001
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SH
1002=head2 v5.22.1 - Wilhelm Müller, trans. Anon., "Courage" (No. 22 in Schubert's song-cycle, "Winterreise")
1003
1004L<Announced on 2015-12-13 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/12/msg233318.html>
1005
1006 If the snow flies in my face,
1007 Let me shake it off me!
1008 If my heart within me speaks,
1009 I'll sing bright and gaily!
1010
1011 Will not listen what it says,
1012 Have no ears for moaning.
1013 Do not feel what it complains,--
1014 Only fools like groaning!
1015
1016 Jolly brave into the world,
1017 'Gainst all wind and weather,--
1018 If there is no God on earth,
1019 Let 's be gods down nether!
1020
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SH
1021=head2 v5.22.1-RC4 - Wilhelm Müller, trans. Anon., "The Signpost" (No. 20 in Schubert's song-cycle, "Winterreise")
1022
1023L<Announced on 2015-12-08 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/12/msg233215.html>
1024
1025 Why do I shun all those highways
1026 Which the other wanderer seeks?
1027 Why do I find bridged by-ways
1028 Through snow-covered deep creeks?
1029
1030 For I have no crime committed,
1031 Why I should now run from men,--
1032 What demented heart's desire
1033 Drives me to a desert glen?
1034
1035 Signposts on all highways stationed
1036 Point their signs toward the towns,
1037 Whilst I wonder 'yond moderation,
1038 Without rest, yet seeking rest!
1039
1040 One such signpost I see planted
1041 Of my question unconcerned,
1042 One road must my choice be granted,
1043 Whence no man has yet returned!
1044
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SH
1045=head2 v5.22.1-RC3 - Wilhelm Müller, trans. Anon., "Stormy Morning" (No. 18 in Schubert's song-cycle, "Winterreise")
1046
1047L<Announced on 2015-12-02 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/12/msg233032.html>
1048
1049 How the storm tore rents
1050 In heavens gray attired!
1051 The rags of cloud are flying
1052 Around, of combat tired.
1053
1054 And flames of fire lambent,
1055 Fly between them and part,
1056 That 's what I call a morning,
1057 A morning after my heart!
1058
1059 My heart sees in the heavens
1060 Its own picture unspoilt--
1061 It's nothing but the Winter,
1062 The Winter, cold and wild.
1063
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SH
1064=head2 v5.22.1-RC2 - Wilhelm Müller, trans. Anon., "The Old Head" (No. 14 in Schubert's song-cycle, "Winterreise")
1065
1066L<Announced on 2015-11-15 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/11/msg232632.html>
1067
1068 The hoary frost has a white sheen
1069 Strewn all over my hair,
1070 So I thought I was an old man
1071 And thought life dealt me fair.
1072
1073 Yet soon was thawed my old white mane,
1074 And I have my black hair again.
1075 How I abhor my young fair years,
1076 How long to wait for death and biers?
1077
1078 From setting sun to morning's hue
1079 Many a head turns white.
1080 Who'll credit it? My hair did not
1081 In all this lifelong plight!
1082
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SH
1083=head2 v5.22.1-RC1 - Wilhelm Müller, trans. Anon., "Will-o'-the Wisp" (No. 9 in Schubert's song-cycle, "Winterreise")
1084
1085L<Announced on 2015-10-31 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/10/msg232321.html>
1086
1087 In the deepest rocky crevice
1088 A will-o'-the wisp lured me;
1089 How I could find my way from here,
1090 For me it's easy memory!
1091
1092 For I am used to straying ways,
1093 Every path to th'end a way,
1094 All our joys and all our suffering,--
1095 To a will-o'-the wisp it 's all play!
1096
1097 Through the dried-up bed of torrents
1098 I quite calmly downward stroll;
1099 Every stream its sea will enter,
1100 Every suffering finds its goal!
1101
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RS
1102=head2 v5.22.0 - Gene Wolfe, The Citadel of the Autarch
1103
1104L<Announced on 2015-06-01 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/06/msg228300.html>
1105
1106“You are the advocate of the dead.”
1107
1108The old man nodded. “I am. People talk about being fair to this one and
1109that one, but nobody I ever heard talks about doing right by them. We
1110take everything they had, which is all right. And spit, most often, on
1111their opinions, which I suppose is all right too. But we ought to
1112remember now and then how much of what we have we got from them. I
1113figure while I’m still here I ought to put a word in for them.”
1114
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RS
1115=head2 v5.22.0-RC2 - T.S. Eliot, unpublished work
1116
1117L<Announced on 2015-05-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/05/msg228142.html>
1118
1119 And when thyself with silver foot shall pass
1120 Among the theories scattered on the grass
1121 Take up my good intentions with the rest
1122
1123=head2 v5.22.0-RC1 - Gene Wolfe, Citadel of the Autarch
1124
1125L<Announced on 2015-05-19 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/05/msg228059.html>
1126
1127There is no limit to stupidity. Space itself is said to be bounded by
1128its own curvature, but stupidity continues beyond infinity.
1129
9ba8eca3
SH
1130=head2 v5.21.11 - Algernon Charles Swinburne, "Dolores (Notre-Dame des Sept Douleurs)"
1131
1132L<Announced on 2015-04-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/04/msg227472.html>
1133
1134 They shall pass and their places be taken,
1135 The gods and the priests that are pure.
1136 They shall pass, and shalt thou not be shaken?
1137 They shall perish, and shalt thou endure?
1138 Death laughs, breathing close and relentless
1139 In the nostrils and eyelids of lust,
1140 With a pinch in his fingers of scentless
1141 And delicate dust.
1142
1143 But the worm shall revive thee with kisses;
1144 Thou shalt change and transmute as a god,
1145 As the rod to a serpent that hisses,
1146 As the serpent again to a rod.
1147 Thy life shall not cease though thou doff it;
1148 Thou shalt live until evil be slain,
1149 And good shall die first, said thy prophet,
1150 Our Lady of Pain.
1151
c8d2be4d
SH
1152=head2 v5.21.10 - Aldous Huxley, "The Devils of Loudun"
1153
1154L<Announced on 2015-03-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/03/msg226847.html>
1155
1156The fire burned on, the good fathers continued to sprinkle and intone.
1157Suddenly a flock of pigeons came swooping down from the church and
1158started to wheel around the roaring column of flame and smoke. The
1159crowd shouted, the archers waved their halberds at the birds, Lactance
1160and Tranquille splashed them on the wing with holy water. In vain. The
1161pigeons were not to be driven away. Round and round they flew, diving
1162through the smoke, singeing their feathers in the flames. Both parties
1163claimed a miracle. For the parson's enemies the birds, quite obviously,
1164were a troop of devils, come to fetch away his soul. For his friends,
1165they were emblems of the Holy Ghost and living proof of his innocence.
1166It never seems to have occurred to anyone that they were just pigeons,
1167obeying the laws of their own, their blessedly other-than-human nature.
1168
94fa4f56
S
1169=head2 v5.21.9 - Emily Dickinson, "There is Another Sky"
1170
c8d2be4d 1171L<Announced on 2015-02-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/02/msg226002.html>
94fa4f56 1172
e5f16b09
SH
1173 There is another sky,
1174 Ever serene and fair,
1175 And there is another sunshine,
1176 Though it be darkness there;
1177 Never mind faded forests, Austin,
1178 Never mind silent fields -
1179 Here is a little forest,
1180 Whose leaf is ever green;
1181 Here is a brighter garden,
1182 Where not a frost has been;
1183 In its unfading flowers
1184 I hear the bright bee hum:
1185 Prithee, my brother,
1186 Into my garden come!
94fa4f56 1187
8917c25b
MH
1188=head2 v5.21.8 - Bill Watterson, "Scientific Progress Goes 'Boink': A Calvin and Hobbes Collection"
1189
06dcbead 1190L<Announced on 2015-01-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/01/msg224869.html>
8917c25b
MH
1191
1192Calvin: OK Hobbes, press the button and duplicate me.
1193Hobbes: Are you sure this is such a good idea?
1194Calvin: Brother! You doubting Thomases get in the way of more scientific advances with your stupid ethical questions! This is a *BRILLIANT* idea! Hit the button, will ya?
1195Hobbes: I'd hate to be accused of inhibiting scientific progress... Here you go.
1196[Box]: *BOINK*
1197Hobbes: Scientific progress goes "BOINK"?
1198Calvin?: It worked! It worked! I'm a genius!
1199Cavlin??: No you're not, you liar! *I* invented this!
1200
2ee7da68 1201=head2 v5.21.7 - Robert Heinlein, "The Number of the Beast"
d171d861
MM
1202
1203L<Announced on 2014-12-20 by Max Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/12/msg223774.html>
1204
4ed12d4a
SH
1205"Zebadiah, Hilda and I salvaged and put everything into the basket.
1206Hilda started to put it into our wardrobe-and it was heavy. So
1207we looked. Packed as tight as when we left Oz. Six bananas-and
1208everything else. Cross my heart. No, go look."
1209"Hmmm- Jake, can you write equations for a picnic basket that
1210refills itself? Will it go on doing so?"
1211"Zeb, equations can be written to describe anything. The description
1212would be simpler for a basket that replenishes itself indefinitely
1213than for one that does it once and stops-I would have to describe
1214the discontinuity."
d171d861 1215
2ee7da68 1216=head2 v5.21.6 - Jeff Noon, "Vurt"
11741df4
CBW
1217
1218L<Announced on 2014-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/11/msg222448.html>
1219
4ed12d4a
SH
1220GAME CAT
1221
1222EXCHANGE MECHANISMS. Sometimes we lose precious
1223things. Friends and colleagues, fellow travellers in the
1224Vurt, sometimes we lose them; even lovers we sometimes
1225lose. And get bad things in exchange: aliens, objects,
1226snakes, and sometimes even death. Things we don't want.
1227This is part of the deal, part of the game deal;
1228all things, in all worlds, must be kept in balance.
1229Kittlings often ask, who decides on the swappings? Now then,
1230some say it's all accidental; that some poor Vurt thing
1231finds himself too close to a door, at too critical a time,
1232just when something real is being lost. Whoosh! Swap time!
1233Others say that some kind of overseer is working the
1234MECHANISMS OF EXCHANGE, deciding the fate of innocents.
1235The Cat can only tease at this, because of the big secrets
1236involved, and because of the levels between you, the reader,
1237and me, the Game Cat. Hey, listen; I've struggled to get
1238where I am today; why should I give you the easy route?
1239Get working, kittlings! Reach up higher. Work the Vurt.
11741df4 1240
2ee7da68 1241=head2 v5.21.5 - Friso Wiegersma (text), Jean Ferrat (music), Wim Sonneveld (performer), "Het Dorp"
b22c1b06
A
1242
1243L<Announced on 2014-10-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/10/msg221399.html>
1244
1245 Het Dorp
1246
1247 Thuis heb ik nog een ansichtkaart
1248 waarop een kerk, een kar met paard,
1249 een slagerij J. van der Ven.
1250 Een kroeg, een juffrouw op de fiets
1251 het zegt u hoogstwaarschijnlijk niets,
1252 maar 't is waar ik geboren ben.
1253 Dit dorp, ik weet nog hoe het was,
1254 de boerenkind'ren in de klas,
1255 een kar die ratelt op de keien,
1256 het raadhuis met een pomp ervoor,
1257 een zandweg tussen koren door,
11741df4 1258 het vee, de boerderijen.
b22c1b06
A
1259
1260 En langs het tuinpad van m'n vader
1261 zag ik de hoge bomen staan.
1262 Ik was een kind en wist niet beter,
11741df4 1263 dan dat dat nooit voorbij zou gaan.
b22c1b06
A
1264
1265 Wat leefden ze eenvoudig toen
1266 in simp'le huizen tussen groen
1267 met boerenbloemen en een heg.
1268 Maar blijkbaar leefden ze verkeerd,
1269 het dorp is gemoderniseerd
1270 en nu zijn ze op de goeie weg.
1271 Want ziet, hoe rijk het leven is,
1272 ze zien de televisiequiz
1273 en wonen in betonnen dozen,
1274 met flink veel glas, dan kun je zien
1275 hoe of het bankstel staat bij Mien
1276 en d'r dressoir met plastic rozen.
1277
1278 En langs het tuinpad van m'n vader
1279 zag ik de hoge bomen staan.
1280 Ik was een kind en wist niet beter,
11741df4 1281 dan dat dat nooit voorbij zou gaan.
b22c1b06
A
1282
1283 De dorpsjeugd klit wat bij elkaar
1284 in minirok en beatle-haar
1285 en joelt wat mee met beat-muziek.
1286 Ik weet wel, het is hun goeie recht,
1287 de nieuwe tijd, net wat u zegt,
1288 maar het maakt me wat melancholiek.
1289 Ik heb hun vaders nog gekend
1290 ze kochten zoethout voor een cent
1291 ik zag hun moeders touwtjespringen.
1292 Dat dorp van toen, het is voorbij,
1293 dit is al wat er bleef voor mij:
1294 een ansicht en herinneringen.
1295
1296 Toen ik langs het tuinpad van m'n vader
1297 de hoge bomen nog zag staan.
1298 Ik was een kind, hoe kon ik weten
1299 dat dat voorgoed voorbij zou gaan.
1300
2ee7da68 1301=head2 v5.21.4 - Edgar Allan Poe, "The Narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym of Nantucket"
28c2c58f
SH
1302
1303L<Announced on 2014-09-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg220267.html>
1304
4ed12d4a
SH
1305To-day, being in latitude 83° 20', longitude 43° 5' W. (the sea being
1306of an extraordinarily dark colour), we again saw land from the
1307masthead, and, upon a closer scrutiny, found it to be one of a group
1308of very large islands. The shore was precipitous, and the interior
1309seemed to be well wooded, a circumstance which occasioned us great
1310joy. In about four hours from our first discovering the land we came
1311to anchor in ten fathoms, sandy bottom, a league from the coast, as a
1312high surf, with strong ripples here and there, rendered a nearer
1313approach of doubtful expediency. The two largest boats were now
1314ordered out, and a party, well armed (among whome were Peters and
1315myself), proceeded to look for an opening in the reef which appeared
1316to encircle the island. After searching about for some time, we
1317discovered an inlet, which we were entering, when we saw four large
1318canoes put off from the shore, filled with men who seemed to be well
1319armed. We waited for them to come up, and, as they moved with great
1320rapidity, they were soon within hail. Captain Guy now held up a white
1321handkerchief on the blade of an oar, when the strangers made a full
1322stop, and commenced a loud jabbering all at once, intermingled with
1323occasional shouts, in which we could distinguish the words Anamoo-moo!
1324and Lama-Lama! They continued this for at least half an hour, during
1325which we had a good opportunity of observing their appearance.
28c2c58f 1326
c682aa67
SH
1327=head2 v5.21.3 - Robert Service, "The Men that Don't Fit In"
1328
1329L<Announced on 2014-08-20 by Peter Martini|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/08/msg218826.html>
1330
1331 If they just went straight they might go far,
1332 They are strong and brave and true;
1333 But they're always tired of the things that are,
1334 And they want the strange and new.
1335 They say: "Could I find my proper groove,
1336 What a deep mark I would make!"
1337 So they chop and change, and each fresh move
1338 Is only a fresh mistake.
1339
1340=head2 v5.21.2 - Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin, Charlie Duke, Final minutes of communication of the first manned moon landing, July 20, 1969
1341
1342L<Announced on 2014-07-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/07/msg217937.html>
1343
1344 Armstrong: Okay. Here's a...Looks like a good area here.
1345 Aldrin: I got the shadow out there.
1346 Aldrin: 250, down at 2 1/2, 19 forward.
1347 Aldrin: Altitude, velocity lights.
1348 Aldrin: 3 1/2 down, 220 feet, 13 forward.
1349 Aldrin: 11 forward. Coming down nicely.
1350 Armstrong: Gonna be right over that crater.
1351 Aldrin: 200 feet, 4 1/2 down.
1352 Aldrin: 5 1/2 down.
1353 Armstrong: I got a good spot [garbled].
1354 Aldrin: 160 feet, 6 1/2 down.
1355 Aldrin: 5 1/2 down, 9 forward. You're looking good.
1356 Aldrin: 120 feet.
1357 Aldrin: 100 feet, 3 1/2 down, 9 forward. Five percent. Quantity light.
1358 Aldrin: Okay. 75 feet. And it's looking good. Down a half, 6 forward.
1359 Duke: 60 seconds.
1360 Aldrin: Light's on.
1361 Aldrin: 60 feet, down 2 1/2. 2 forward. 2 forward. That's good.
1362 Aldrin: 40 feet, down 2 1/2. Picking up some dust.
1363 Aldrin: 30 feet, 2 1/2 down. [Garbled] shadow.
1364 Aldrin: 4 forward. 4 forward. Drifting to the right a little. 20 feet,
1365 down a half.
1366 Duke: 30 seconds.
1367 Aldrin: Drifting forward just a little bit; that's good.
1368 Aldrin: Contact Light.
1369 Armstrong: Shutdown.
1370 Aldrin: Okay. Engine Stop.
1371 Aldrin: ACA out of Detent.
1372 Armstrong: Out of Detent. Auto.
1373 Aldrin: Mode Control, both Auto. Descent Engine Command Override, Off.
1374 Engine Arm, Off. 413 is in.
1375 Duke: We copy you down, Eagle.
1376 Armstrong: Engine arm is off.
1377 Armstrong: Houston, Tranquility Base here. The Eagle has landed.
1378 Duke: Roger, Twan...[correcting himself] Tranquility. We copy you on
1379 the ground. You got a bunch of guys about to turn blue.
1380 We're breathing again. Thanks a lot.
1381 Aldrin: Thank you.
1382
1383=head2 v5.21.1 - Robert Jordan, "The Crossroads of Twilights", Book 10 of "The Wheel of Time"
1384
1385L<Announced on 2014-06-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/06/msg217030.html>
1386
1387 We rode on the winds of the rising storm,
1388 We ran to the sounds of the thunder.
1389 We danced among the lightning bolts,
1390 and tore the world asunder.
1391
1392 -- Anonymous fragment of a poem believed
1393 written near the end of the previous Age,
1394 known by some as the Third Age.
1395 Sometimes attributed to the Dragon
1396 Reborn.
1397
1398=head2 v5.21.0 - Friedrich von Schiller, "The Song of the Bell"
1399
1400L<Announced on 2014-05-27 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/05/msg215826.html>
1401
1402 Walled in fast within the earth
1403 Stands the form burnt out of clay.
1404 This must be the bell’s great birth!
1405 Fellows, lend a hand to-day.
1406 Sweat must trickle now
1407 From the burning brow,
1408 Till the work its master honour.
1409 Blessing comes from Heaven’s Donor.
1410
f483a002
SH
1411=head2 v5.20.3 - Elias Lönnrot, trans. Keith Bosley, "The Kalevala", Canto 42: Stealing the Sampo
1412
1413L<Announced on 2015-09-12 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/09/msg230945.html>
1414
1415 Steady old Väinämöinen
1416 uttered a word and spoke thus:
1417 'No lilting on the waters
1418 and no singing on the waves!
1419 Song keeps you lazy
1420 tales delay rowing.
1421 Precious day would pass and night
1422 would overtake us midway
1423 on these wide waters
1424 upon these vast waves.'
1425
1426 The wanton Lemminkäinen
1427 uttered a word and spoke thus:
1428 'The time will pass anyway
1429 the fair day will flee
1430 and the night will come panting
1431 and the twilight will steal in
1432 if you don't sing while you live
1433 nor hum in this world.'
1434
9d05662d
SH
1435=head2 v5.20.3-RC2 - Anon., trans. Malcolm C. Lyons, "The Story of Abu Muhammad the Idle and the Marvels He Encountered with the Ape As Well As the Marvels of the Seas and Islands", from "Tales of the Marvellous and News of the Strange"
1436
1437L<Announced on 2015-08-29 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/08/msg230544.html>
1438
1439'I fled from Basra, sad and tearful, with no idea where I was going,
1440and I was reciting these lines:
1441
1442 The pain of parting makes me melt away,
1443 As lovers do when those they love are harsh.
1444 I wonder at the patience that I showed
1445 When I had lost my love, for that was wonderful.
1446 Beloved, do you know that since you left,
1447 I have remained confused in misery.
1448
1449I then heard a voice that said: "Damn you, have you no fear of
1450Almighty God that you hand over a girl to an unbelieving 'ifrit?" I
1451walked for a time amongst the palm-trees until I caught sight of a
1452person, whom I approached. When I asked him who he was he said: "I
1453am one of the jinn who were converted to Islam at the hands of 'Ali
1454ibn Abi Talib, may God ennoble him." "How can I get to my wife?" I
1455asked him, and he said: "Wretched fellow, you had a bird which you
1456allowed to fly away and now you want to fly after it." But he
1457added: "Follow this road with God's blessing all night until dawn
1458and then by the shore you will see a huge cave in which there is an
1459idol made of white stone. You must drink of the water that there is
1460coming out of the cave and smear your face with its mud. Stay there
1461and a barge will pass you as you stand opposite the statue. Various
1462different creatures will emerge, heads without bodies and bodies
1463without heads, and they will prostrate themselves in adoration to
1464the idol rather than to Almighty God. When you see that, embark on
1465the barge and cross to the other bank and walk along it until
1466sunset. On a high point you will see a castle built of bricks of
1467gold and silver. That is where your 'ifrit will be. I have now
1468told you about this, so goodbye."
1469
1c94dd53
SH
1470=head2 v5.20.3-RC1 - Anon., trans. Malcolm C. Lyons, "The Story of Abu Muhammad the Idle and the Marvels He Encountered with the Ape As Well As the Marvels of the Seas and Islands", from "Tales of the Marvellous and News of the Strange"
1471
1472L<Announced on 2015-08-22 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/08/msg230359.html>
1473
1474'On the night of the wedding the ape came to sit in front of me and
1475asked me what I intended to do. "Whatever you tell me," I replied,
1476and he said: "Take care not to covet the girl, or I shall come back
1477and burn you up and leave you as a lesson for those who can learn."
1478I agreed to this and when evening came I found the world full of
1479candles and torches burning in holders of gold and silver. There
1480were servants and serving girls, and everyone who saw me
1481congratulated me on my good fortune, as there was no girl on the
1482face of the earth more beautiful than my bride.
1483[...]
1484'Next morning I went out to the market, and people went in and asked
1485her how the night had been. "He never looked up at me," she told
1486them. Then, when it was afternoon, I went to my house, where the
1487ape was sitting by the door. "Tell me what you did," it said, and I
1488told it: "By God, I did not learn and do not know whether this was a
1489man or a girl." "That's what I want," it said.
1490[...]
1491'On the second night my bride was brought to me, after which the
1492servants left her and went away. She fell asleep, and, while she
1493was sleeping, I killed the cock, wrapped it in the cloth and put the
1494four poles from the couch over it. Suddenly there was a huge crash
1495like a peal of thunder and a fiery 'ifrit swooped on the girl. I
1496fainted at the sight and when I recovered I heard a voice saying:
1497"By the Lord of the Ka'ba, the girl has been carried off!" and there
1498was a sound like the rustling of wind and bitter weeping. At this I
1499shed tears, struck my head and was filled with regret when it was no
1500longer of any use, for to me the whole world was worth no more than
1501a bean.
1502
61c85015
SH
1503=head2 v5.20.2 - Jonathan "Jonti" Picking, L<"Magical Trevor"|http://www.weebls-stuff.com/other-toons/video/magical-trevor.html>
1504
1505L<Announced on 2015-02-14 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/02/msg225777.html>
1506
1507 Everyone loves Magical Trevor,
1508 'Cos the tricks that he does are ever so clever;
1509 Look at him now, disappearin' the cow,
1510 Where is the cow hidden right now?
1511
1512 Taking a bow, it's Magical Trevor,
1513 Everybody's seen that the trick is clever;
1514 Look at him there with his leathery, leathery whip!
1515 It's made of magic, and with a little flip--
1516
1517 Yeah, yeah, yeah, the cow is back,
1518 Yeah, yeah, yeah, the cow is back;
1519 Back, back, back from his magical journey,
1520 Yeah!
1521
1522 What did he see in the parallel dimension?
1523 He saw beans, lots of beans, lots of beans, lots of beans;
1524 Oh, beans, lots of beans, lots of beans, lots of beans,
1525 Yeah, yeah!
1526
8e0a1bb9
SH
1527=head2 v5.20.2-RC1 - Jonathan "Jonti" Picking, L<"Scampi"|http://www.weebls-stuff.com/other-toons/video/scampi.html>
1528
1529L<Announced on 2015-02-01 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/02/msg225273.html>
1530
1531 I've seen things,
1532 I've seen them with my eyes;
1533 I've seen things,
1534 They're often in disguise.
1535
1536 Like carrots, handbags, cheese, toilets,
1537 Russians, planets, hamsters, weddings,
1538 Poets, Stalin, Kuala Lumpur!
1539 Pygmies, budgies, Kuala Lumpur!
1540
1541 I've seen things,
1542 I've seen them with my eyes;
1543 I've seen things,
1544 They're often in disguise.
1545
1546 Like carrots, handbags, cheese...
1547
2ee7da68 1548=head2 v5.20.1 - Lorenzo da Ponte, trans. Diana Reed, "Così fan tutte"
c43e8743
SH
1549
1550L<Announced on 2014-09-14 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg219789.html>
1551
1552 DORABELLA (as if waking from a daze): Where are they?
1553 DON ALFONSO: They've gone.
1554 FIORDILIGI: Oh, the cruel bitterness of parting!
1555
1556 DON ALFONSO:
1557 Take heart, my dearest children.
1558 Look, in the distance, your lovers are waving to you.
1559
1560 FIORDILIGI: Bon voyage, my darling!
1561 DORABELLA: Bon voyage!
1562
1563 FIORDILIGI:
1564 O heavens! How swiftly the ship is sailing away!
1565 It is disappearing already!
1566 It is no longer in sight!
1567 Oh, may heaven grant it a prosperous voyage!
1568
1569 DORABELLA: May good luck attend it to the battlefield!
1570 DON ALFONSO: And may your sweethearts and my friends be safe!
1571
1572 FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA, DON ALFONSO:
1573 May the wind be gentle,
1574 may the sea be calm,
1575 and may the elements
1576 respond kindly
1577 to our wishes.
1578
2ee7da68 1579=head2 v5.20.1-RC2 - Lorenzo da Ponte, trans. William Weaver, "Così fan tutte"
d1da2d57
SH
1580
1581L<Announced on 2014-09-07 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg219446.html>
1582
1583 GUGLIELMO:
1584 Oh God, I feel that this foot of mine
1585 is reluctant to come before her.
1586
1587 FERRANDO:
1588 My trembling lip
1589 can utter no word.
1590
1591 DON ALFONSO:
1592 The hero displays his manliness
1593 in the most terrible moments.
1594
1595 FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA:
1596 Now that we have heard the news,
1597 you have the lesser duty:
1598 Take heart, and plunge your swords
1599 into both our hearts.
1600
1601 FERRANDO, GUGLIELMO:
1602 My idol, blame fate
1603 that I must abandon you.
1604
1605 DORABELLA: Ah no, you shall not leave...
1606 FIORDILIGI: No, cruel one, you shall not go...
1607 DORABELLA: First I want to tear out my heart.
1608 FIORDILIGI: First I want to die at your feet.
1609 FERRANDO (softly to Don Alfonso): What do you say to that?
1610 GUGLIELMO (softly to Don Alfonso): You realise?
1611 DON ALFONSO (softly): Steady, friend, finem lauda.
1612
1613 ALL:
1614 Thus destiny defrauds
1615 the hopes of mortals.
1616 Ah, among so many misfortunes,
1617 who can ever love life?
1618
2ee7da68 1619=head2 v5.20.1-RC1 - Lorenzo da Ponte, trans. William Weaver, "Così fan tutte"
e1ded6ad
SH
1620
1621L<Announced on 2014-08-25 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/08/msg218975.html>
1622
1623 DON ALFONSO:
1624 I'd like to speak, but I haven't the heart:
1625 my lip stammers.
1626 My voice cannot emerge,
1627 but remains in my throat.
1628 What will you do? What shall I do?
1629 Oh what a great catastrophe!
1630 There can be nothing worse.
1631 I feel pity for you and for them.
1632
1633 FIORDILIGI: Heavens! For mercy's sake, Signor Alfonso, don't make us
1634 die.
1635 DON ALFONSO: My children, you must arm yourselves with constancy.
1636 DORABELLA: Ye Gods! What evil has occurred? What horrible event? Is my
1637 love dead, perhaps?
1638 FIORDILIGI: Is mine dead?
1639 DON ALFONSO: They are not dead, but they are not far from it.
1640 DORABELLA: Wounded?
1641 DON ALFONSO: No.
1642 FIORDILIGI: Ill?
1643 DON ALFONSO: Nor that.
1644 FIORDILIGI: What, then?
1645 DON ALFONSO: A royal command summons them to the field of battle.
1646 FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA: Alas, what do I hear? And they will leave?
1647 DON ALFONSO: Immediately.
1648 DORABELLA: And there is no way of preventing it?
1649 DON ALFONSO: There is none.
1650 FIORDILIGI: And not even a single farewell...
1651 DON ALFONSO: The unhappy men haven't the courage to see you; but if
1652 you wish it, they are ready...
1653 DORABELLA: Where are they?
1654 DON ALFONSO: Come in, friends.
1655
7684c8f0
RS
1656=head2 v5.20.0 - William Shakespeare, Sonnet 18
1657
1658L<Announced on 2014-05-27 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/05/msg215815.html>
1659
1660 But thy eternal summer shall not fade,
1661 Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st;
1662 Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
1663 When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st:
1664 So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
1665 So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.
1666
f17f1150
RS
1667=head2 v5.20.0-RC1 - Lindsey Buckingham, "Second Hand News"
1668
1669L<Announced on 2014-05-17 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/05/msg215479.html>
1670
1671 When times go bad
1672 when times go rough
1673 Won't you lay me down in tall grass
1674 And let me do my stuff
1675
2ee7da68 1676=head2 v5.19.11 - Isidore-Lucien Ducasse [as "Comte de Lautréamont"], trans. Paul Knight, "Les Chants de Maldoror"
50bb8485
SH
1677
1678L<Announced on 2014-04-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/04/msg214580.html>
1679
1680O rigorous mathematics, I have not forgotten you since your wise lessons,
1681sweeter than honey, filtered into my heart like a refreshing wave.
1682Instinctively, from the cradle, I had longed to drink from your source, older
1683than the sun, and I continue to tread the sacred sanctuary of your solemn
1684temple, I, the most faithful of your devotees. There was a vagueness in my
1685mind, something thick as smoke; but I managed to mount the steps which lead to
1686your altar, and you drove away this dark veil, as the wind blows the
1687draught-board. You replaced it with excessive coldness, consummate prudence and
1688implacable logic. With the aid of your fortifying milk, my intellect developed
1689rapidly and took on immense proportions amid the ravishing lucidity which you
1690bestow as a gift on all those who sincerely love you. Arithmetic! Algebra!
1691Geometry! Awe-inspiring trinity! Luminous triangle! He who has not known you
1692is a fool!
1693
2ee7da68 1694=head2 v5.19.10 - John Chadwick, "The Decipherment of Linear B"
9e616318
AC
1695
1696L<Announced on 2014-03-20 by Aaron Crane|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/03/msg213851.html>
071a75f5
AC
1697
1698The urge to discover secrets is deeply ingrained in human nature; even
1699the least curious mind is roused by the promise of sharing knowledge
1700withheld from others. Some are fortunate enough to find a job which
1701consists in the solution of mysteries, whether it be the physicist who
1702tracks down a hitherto unknown nuclear particle or the policeman who
1703detects a criminal. But most of us are driven to sublimate this urge
1704by the solving of artificial puzzles devised for our entertainment.
1705
2ee7da68 1706=head2 v5.19.9 - R. A. MacAvoy, "Tea with the Black Dragon"
132664ae
TC
1707
1708L<Announced on 2014-02-20 by Tony Cook|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/02/msg213047.html>
1709
1710Old hands. The smell of rain--the smell of Ch'an. Quiet words in
1711rough Cantonese. "I am not to be your master. Your master has to be
1712stronger than you are--has to tell you you are a fool and make you
1713know it. And make you feel content in being a fool. How could I do
1714that for you? I'm old. You are too strong for me; you are full of
1715chi." The old man has paused then, huddled against the wind while
1716clouds thickened above them.
1717
1718"I will tell you this, Long," he continued, "Before you find yourself
1719you will lose your chi. Also you will leave behind you all pride of
1720body, pride of mind. You will be reduced. Like me." The old man
1721closed his eyes, and rain began to beat against his gray, crew-cut
1722hair. He pulled his coat closer. Suddenly his eyes snapped open and
1723he looked Long in the face.
1724
1725"You must leave China. Go across the ocean. There you will meet your
1726master." He set down his teacup with a palsied hand. His voice rose,
1727grew fierce.
1728
1729"I tell you this, most honored and impressive visitor. You are a
1730fool, yes, but you will find the very thing you seek. You will find
1731truth!"
1732
2ee7da68 1733=head2 v5.19.8 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
d897adff
RS
1734
1735L<Announced on 2014-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/01/msg211729.html>
1736
1737“I used to get a big kick out of saving people’s lives. Now I wonder what the
1738hell’s the point, since they all have to die anyway.”
1739
1740“Oh, there’s a point, all right,” Dunbar assured him.
1741
1742“Is there? What is the point?”
1743
1744“The point is to keep them from dying for as long as you can.”
1745
1746“Yeah, but what’s the point, since they all have to die anyway?”
1747
1748“The trick is not to think about that.”
1749
1750“Never mind the trick. What the hell’s the point?”
1751
1752Dunbar pondered in silence for a few moments. “Who the hell knows?”
1753
2cff31c9
A
1754=head2 v5.19.7 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Slaughterhouse-Five"
1755
1756L<Announced on 2013-12-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/12/msg210882.html>
1757
e91f1fc1
SH
1758And somewhere in there was springtime. The corpse mines were closed
1759down. The soldiers all left to fight the Russians. In the suburbs,
1760the women and children dug rifle pits. Billy and the rest of his group
1761were locked up in the stable in the suburbs. And then, one morning,
1762they got up to discover that the door was unlocked. World War Two in
1763Europe was over.
2cff31c9 1764
e91f1fc1
SH
1765Billy and the rest wandered out onto the shady street. The trees were
1766leafing out. There was nothing going on out there, no traffic of any
1767kind. There was only one vehicle, an abandoned wagon drawn by two
1768horses. The wagon was green and coffin-shaped.
2cff31c9 1769
e91f1fc1 1770Birds were talking.
2cff31c9 1771
e91f1fc1 1772One bird said to Billy Pilgrim, "Pee-tee-weet?"
2cff31c9 1773
5a3c3c58
CBW
1774=head2 v5.19.6 - Monty Python's Flying Circus, "Spam"
1775
1776L<Announced on 2013-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/11/msg210043.html>
1777
4ed12d4a
SH
1778 Interior: cheap cafe. All the customers are Vikings. Mr and Mrs Bun enter downwards (on wires).
1779
1780 Mr. Bun: Morning.
1781 Waitress: Morning.
1782 Mr. Bun: What have you got, then?
1783 Waitress: Well there's egg and bacon; egg, sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg, bacon and spam;
1784 egg, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam;
1785 spam, spam, spam, egg and spam; spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam;
1786 or lobster thermidor aux crevettes, with a mornay sauce garnished with truffle pate, brandy and a fried
1787 egg on top and spam
1788 Mrs. Bun: Have you got anything without spam in it?
1789 Waitress: Well, there's spam, egg, sausage and spam. That's not got MUCH spam in it.
1790 Mrs. Bun: I don't want ANY spam.
1791 Mr. Bun: Why can't she have egg, bacon, spam and sausage?
1792 Mrs. Bun: That's got spam in it!
1793 Mr. Bun: Not as much as spam, egg, sausage and spam.
1794 Mrs. Bun: Look, could I have egg, bacon, spam and sausage, without the spam.
1795 Waitress: Uuuuuuggggh!
1796 Mrs. Bun: What d'you mean, uugggh! I don't like spam.
1797 Vikings: (singing) Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam ... spam, spam, spam, spam ... lovely spam, wonderful spam ...
1798
1799 (Brief shot of a Viking ship)
1800
1801 Waitress: Shut up. Shut up! Shut up! You can't have egg, bacon, spam and sausage without the spam.
1802 Mrs. Bun: Why not?
1803 Waitress: No, it wouldn't be egg, bacon, spam and sausage, would it?
1804 Mrs. Bun: I don't like spam!
5a3c3c58 1805
40e1c3e8 1806=head2 v5.19.5 - Charles Baudelaire, trans. James McGowan, "The Flowers of Evil", 51. The Cat
4d764166
SH
1807
1808L<Announced on 2013-10-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/10/msg208752.html>
1809
4d764166
SH
1810 I
1811
1812 A cat is strolling through my mind
1813 Acting as though he owned the place,
1814 A lovely cat -- strong, charming, sweet.
1815 When he meows, one scarcely hears,
1816
1817 So tender and discreet his tone;
1818 But whether he should growl or purr
1819 His voice is always rich and deep.
1820 That is the secret of his charm.
1821
1822 This purling voice that filters down
1823 Into my darkest depths of soul
1824 Fulfils me like a balanced verse,
1825 Delights me as a potion would.
1826
1827 It puts to sleep the cruellest ills
1828 And keeps a rein on ecstasies --
1829 Without the need for any words
1830 It can pronounce the longest phrase.
1831
1832 Oh no, there is no bow that draws
1833 Across my heart, fine instrument,
1834 And makes to sing so royally
1835 The strongest and the purest chord,
1836
1837 More than your voice, mysterious cat,
1838 Exotic cat, seraphic cat,
1839 In whom all is, angelically,
1840 As subtle as harmonious.
1841
1842 II
1843
1844 From his soft fur, golden and brown,
1845 Goes out so sweet a scent, one night
1846 I might have been embalmed in it
1847 By giving him one little pet.
1848
1849 He is my household's guardian soul;
1850 He judges, he presides, inspires
1851 All matters in hos royal realm;
1852 Might he be fairy? or a god?
1853
1854 When my eyes, to this cat I love
1855 Drawn as by a magnet's force,
1856 Turn tamely back from that appeal,
1857 And when I look within myself,
1858
1859 I notice with astonishment
1860 The fire of his opal eyes,
1861 Clear beacons glowing, living jewels,
1862 Taking my measure, steadily.
1863
ce520fa6
SH
1864=head2 v5.19.4 - Washington Irving, "The Widow and Her Son"
1865
1866L<Announced on 2013-09-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/09/msg207969.html>
1867
ce520fa6
SH
1868There is something in sickness that breaks down the pride of manhood;
1869that softens the heart and brings it back to the feelings of infancy.
1870Who that has languished, even in advanced life, in sickness and
1871despondency — who that has pined on a weary bed in the neglect and
1872loneliness of a foreign land — but has thought on the mother "that
1873looked on his childhood," that smoothed his pillow and administered to
1874his helplessness. — Oh! there is an enduring tenderness in the love
1875of a mother to her son that transcends all other affections of the
1876heart. It is neither to be chilled by selfishness — nor daunted by
1877danger — nor weakened by worthlessness — nor stifled by ingratitude.
1878She will sacrifice every comfort to his convenience — she will
1879surrender every pleasure to his enjoyment — she will glory in his fame
1880and exult in his prosperity. And if misfortune overtake him he will
1881be the dearer to her from misfortune — and if disgrace settle upon his
1882name, she will still love and cherish him in spite of his disgrace —
1883and if all the world beside cast him off, she will be all the world to
1884him.
1885
9a701c04
SH
1886=head2 v5.19.3 - Andrew Hodges, "Alan Turing: The Enigma"
1887
1888L<Announced on 2013-08-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/08/msg206318.html>
1889
9a701c04
SH
1890E.M. Forster, outdoing the King's heresy with grand bravura, had
1891written in 1938 that if he were faced with the choice between
1892betraying his country and betraying his friends, he hoped he would
1893have the courage to betray his country. He would always put the
1894personal above the political. But for Alan Turing, unlike Forster, or
1895Wittgenstein, or G.H. Hardy, it was more than a theoretical question.
1896For him not only had the personal become the political, but the
1897political was the personal. He had chosen and promised for himself in
1898working for the government. The choice for him therefore was that
1899between betraying one part of himself and betraying another part. And
1900however much he wavered between these alternatives, there was a solid
1901logic to the mind of security, one that could not be expected to take
1902an interest in notions of freedom and development. He had no rights
1903to such things, as he would have had to admit. He might have
1904outwitted the Home Guard, but when it came to questions that mattered,
1905there was no doubt that he had placed himself under military law.
1906There was a war on; there was always a war on now.
1907
0b0ed28b
AP
1908=head2 v5.19.2 - Fred Brooks, "The Mythical Man-Month"
1909
1910L<Announced on 2013-07-22 by Aristotle Pagaltzis|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/07/msg204905.html>
1911
c2a00619
KW
1912The magic of myth and legend has come true in our time. One types the
1913correct incantation on a keyboard, and a display screen comes to life,
1914showing things that never were nor could be. [...] Not all is delight,
1915however [...] One must perform perfectly. The computer resembles the
1916magic of legend in this respect, too. If one character, one pause, of
1917the incantation is not strictly in proper form, the magic doesn't work.
1918
549a11ea
DG
1919=head2 v5.19.1 - William Shakespeare, "A Midsummer Night's Dream"
1920
703078b2 1921L<Announced on 2013-06-21 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/06/msg203449.html>
549a11ea
DG
1922
1923 Over hill, over dale,
1924 Thorough bush, thorough briar,
1925 Over park, over pale,
1926 Thorough flood, thorough fire,
1927 I do wander everywhere,
1928 Swifter than the moon's sphere;
1929 And I serve the fairy queen,
1930 To dew her orbs upon the green.
1931 The cowslips tall her pensioners be;
1932 In their gold coats, spots you see;
1933 Those be rubies, fairy favours,
1934 In their freckles live our savours.
1935 I must go seek some dew-drops here,
1936 And hang a perl in every cowslip's ear.
1937 Farewell, thou lob of spirits, I'll be gone;
1938 My queen and all her elves come here anon!
1939
5f42d1f2 1940=head2 v5.19.0 - Batman, of the Joker, in "The Dark Knight Returns"
549a11ea
DG
1941
1942L<Announced on 2013-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201980.html>
1943
1944 From the beginning, I knew…
1945 …that there was nothing wrong with you…
1946 …that I can't fix…
1947 …with my hands…
1948
40e1c3e8 1949=head2 v5.18.4 - Robert W. Chambers, Cassilda's Song in "The King in Yellow," Act I, Scene 2
8bbce0b1
RS
1950
1951L<Announced on 2014-10-01 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/10/msg220770.html>
1952
1953 Along the shore the cloud waves break,
1954 The twin suns sink beneath the lake,
1955 The shadows lengthen
1956 In Carcosa.
1957
1958 Strange is the night where black stars rise,
1959 And strange moons circle through the skies
1960 But stranger still is
1961 Lost Carcosa.
1962
1963 Songs that the Hyades shall sing,
1964 Where flap the tatters of the King,
1965 Must die unheard in
1966 Dim Carcosa.
1967
1968 Song of my soul, my voice is dead;
1969 Die thou, unsung, as tears unshed
1970 Shall dry and die in
1971 Lost Carcosa.
1972
8bbce0b1
RS
1973=head2 v5.18.3 - (no epigraph)
1974
1975(no epigraph)
1976
40e1c3e8 1977=head2 v5.18.3-RC2 - Robert W. Chambers, "The King in Yellow", Act I, Scene 2
8bbce0b1 1978
dd047fac 1979L<Announced on 2014-09-27 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg220613.html>
8bbce0b1
RS
1980
1981"Ah! I see it now!" I shrieked. "You have seized the throne and the
1982empire. Woe! woe to you who are crowned with the crown of the King in
1983Yellow!"
1984
40e1c3e8 1985=head2 v5.18.3-RC1 - Robert W. Chambers, "The King in Yellow", Act I, Scene 2
8bbce0b1 1986
dd047fac 1987L<Announced on 2014-09-17 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg220072.html>
8bbce0b1
RS
1988
1989 CAMILLA: You, sir, should unmask.
1990
1991 STRANGER: Indeed?
1992
1993 CASSILDA: Indeed it's time. We all have laid aside disguise but you.
1994
1995 STRANGER: I wear no mask.
1996
1997 CAMILLA: (Terrified, aside to Cassilda.) No mask? No mask!
1998
6d0eb662
RS
1999=head2 v5.18.2 - Miss Manners
2000
2001L<Announced on 2014-01-06 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/01/msg211224.html>
2002
2003One of the major mistakes people make is that they think manners are
2004only the expression of happy ideas. There's a whole range of behavior
2005that can be expressed in a mannerly way. That's what civilization is all
2006about – doing it in a mannerly and not an antagonistic way. One of the
2007places we went wrong was the naturalistic Rousseauean movement of the
2008Sixties in which people said, "Why can't you just say what's on your
2009mind?" In civilization there have to be some restraints. If we followed
2010every impulse, we'd be killing one another.
2011
80963870
RS
2012=head2 v5.18.1 - Chuck Moore
2013
2014L<Announced on 2013-08-12 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/08/msg205897.html>
2015
2016The operating system is another concept that is curious. Operating
2017systems are dauntingly complex and totally unnecessary. It’s a brilliant
2018thing that Bill Gates has done in selling the world on the notion of
2019operating systems. It’s probably the greatest con game the world has
2020ever seen.
2021
2022An operating system does absolutely nothing for you. As long as you had
2023something — a subroutine called disk driver, a subroutine called some
2024kind of communication support, in the modern world, it doesn’t do
2025anything else. In fact, Windows spends a lot of time with overlays and
2026disk management all stuff like that which are irrelevant. You’ve got
2027gigabyte disks; you’ve got megabyte RAMs. The world has changed in a way
2028that renders the operating system unnecessary.
2029
2030=head2 v5.18.1-RC1 - Chuck Moore
2031
2032L<Announced on 2013-08-02 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/08/msg205445.html>
2033
2034Compilers are probably the worst code ever written. They are written by
2035someone who has never written a compiler before and will never do so
2036again. The more elaborate the language, the more complex, bug-ridden,
2037and unusable is the compiler. But a simple compiler for a simple
2038language is an essential tool—if only for documentation.
2039
4e720792
RS
2040=head2 v5.18.0 - Yevgeny Zamyatin
2041
2042L<Announced on 2013-05-18 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201940.html>
2043
2044It is an error to divide people into the living and the dead: there are people
2045who are dead-alive, and people who are alive-alive. The dead-alive also write,
2046walk, speak, act. But they make no mistakes; only machines make no mistakes,
2047and they produce only dead things. The alive-alive are constantly in error, in
2048search, in questions, in torment.
2049
2ee7da68 2050=head2 v5.18.0-RC4 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
4e720792 2051
dd047fac 2052L<Announced on 2013-05-16 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201889.html>
4e720792
RS
2053
2054Clevinger was dead. That was the basic flaw in his philosophy.
2055
2056=head2 v5.18.0-RC3 - Tom Waits, "The Ocean Doesn't Want Me"
2057
dd047fac 2058L<Announced on 2013-05-14 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201823.html>
4e720792
RS
2059
2060 I'd love to go drowning
2061 And to stay and to stay
2062 But the ocean doesn't want me today
2063 I'll go in up to here
2064 It can't possibly hurt
2065 All they will find is my beer
2066 And my shirt
2067
2068=head2 v5.18.0-RC2 - Tom Waits, "Earth Died Screaming"
2069
2070L<Announced on 2013-05-12 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201723.html>
2071
2072 And the great day of wrath has come
2073 And here's mud in your big red eye
2074 The poker's in the fire
2075 And the locusts take the sky
2076 And the earth died screaming
2077 While I lay dreaming of you
2078
2079=head2 v5.18.0-RC1 - Tom Waits, "What's He Building in There?"
2080
2081L<Announced on 2013-05-11 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201651.html>
2082
2083 What's he building in there?
2084
2085 We have a right to know…
2086
2ee7da68 2087=head2 v5.17.11 - Nigel Tufnel in "This is Spın̈al Tap"
4e720792
RS
2088
2089L<Announced on 2013-04-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/04/msg201056.html>
2090
2091It's very special because, if you can see, the numbers all go to…
2092eleven! Look, right across the board: eleven, eleven, eleven, eleven!
2093
2ee7da68 2094=head2 v5.17.10 - Vernor Vinge, "A Fire Upon The Deep"
7707f065 2095
f3d08688 2096L<Announced on 2013-03-23 by Max Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/03/msg200504.html>
7707f065
MM
2097
2098The archive informed the automation. Data structures were built, recipes
2099followed. A local network was built, faster than anything on Straum, but surely
2100safe. Nodes were added, modified by other recipes. The archive was a friendly
2101place, with hierarchies of translation keys that led them along. Straum itself
2102would be famous for this.
2103
2104Six months passed. A year.
2105
72f869fd 2106The omniscient view. Not self-aware really. Self-awareness is much over-rated.
7707f065 2107Most automation works far better as a part of a whole, and even if human-
72f869fd 2108powerful, it does not need to self-know.
7707f065 2109
2ee7da68 2110=head2 v5.17.9 - Douglas Adams, "The Hitch-Hikers Guide to the Galaxy"
fed67cf1 2111
f3d08688 2112L<Announced on 2013-02-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/02/msg199115.html>
fed67cf1
CBW
2113
2114Vogon poetry is of course, the third worst in the universe.
2115The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a
2116recitation by their poet master Grunthos the Flatulent of
2117his poem 'Ode To A Small Lump of Green Putty I Found In My
2118Armpit One Midsummer Morning' four of his audience died
2119of internal haemorrhaging and the president of the
2120Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one
2121of his own legs off. Grunthos is reported to have been
2122'disappointed' by the poem's reception, and was about to
2123embark on a reading of his twelve-book epic entitled
2124'My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles' when his own major intestine,
2125in a desperate attempt to save life and civilisation,
2126leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain.
2127
2128The very worst poetry of all perished along with its creator
2129Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Greenbridge, Essex, England,
2130in the destruction of the planet Earth.
2131
2ee7da68 2132=head2 v5.17.8 - Iain Pears, "An Instance of the Fingerpost"
2eea07f2 2133
f3d08688 2134L<Announced on 2013-01-20 by Aaron Crane|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/01/msg197571.html>
2eea07f2
AC
2135
2136I must here declare myself as someone who does not for a moment subscribe to
2137the general view that a willingness to perform oneself is detrimental to the
2138dignity of experimental philosophy. There is, after all, a clear distinction
2139between labour carried out for financial reward, and that done for the
2140improvement of mankind: to put it another way, Lower as a philosopher was
2141fully my equal even if he fell away when he became the practising physician.
2142I think ridiculous of certain professors of anatomy, who find it beneath
2143them to pick up the knife themselves, but merely comment while hired hands
2144do the cutting. Sylvius would never have dreamt of sitting on a dais reading
b86ac955 2145from an authority while others cut — when he taught, the knife was
2eea07f2
AC
2146in his hand and the blood spattered his coat. Boyle also did not scruple to
2147perform his own experiments and, on one occasion in my presence, even showed
2148himself willing to anatomise a rat with his very own hands. Nor was he less
2149a gentleman when he had finished. Indeed, in my opinion, his stature was all
2150the greater, for in Boyle wealth, humility and curiosity mingled, and the
2151world is richer for it.
2152
2ee7da68 2153=head2 v5.17.7 - R. Scott Bakker, "The Darkness That Comes Before"
c2a10b9c 2154
f3d08688 2155L<Announced on 2012-12-18 by Dave Rolsky|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/12/msg196707.html>
c2a10b9c
DR
2156
2157No thought.
4ed12d4a
SH
2158
2159The boy extinguished. Only a place.
2160
2161This place.
2162
2163Motionless, the Pragma sat facing him, the bare soles of his feet flat against each other, his dark frock scored by the shadows of deep folds, his eyes as empty as the child they watched.
2164
2165A place without breath or sound. A place of sight alone. A place without before or after . . . almost.
2166
2167For the first lances of sunlight careered over the glacier, as ponderous as great tree limbs in the wind. Shadows hardened and light gleamed across the Pragma’s ancient skull.
2168
2169The old man’s left hand forsook his right sleeve, bearing a watery knife. And like a rope in water, his arm pitched outward, fingertips trailing across the blade as the knife swung languidly into the air, the sun skating and the dark shrine plunging across its mirror back . . .
2170
2171And the place where Kellhus had once existed extended an open hand—the blond hairs like luminous filaments against tanned skin—and grasped the knife from stunned space.
2172
2173The slap of pommel against palm triggered the collapse of place into little boy. The pale stench of his body. Breath, sound, and lurching thoughts.
2174
2175I have been legion . . .
2176
2177In his periphery, he could see the spike of the sun ease from the mountain. He felt drunk with exhaustion. In the recoil of his trance, it seemed all he could hear were the twigs arching and bobbing in the wind, pulled by leaves like a million sails no bigger than his hand. Cause everywhere, but amid countless minute happenings—diffuse, useless.
2178
2179Now I understand.
c2a10b9c 2180
2ee7da68 2181=head2 v5.17.6 - Kurt Vonnegut, "The Sirens of Titan"
1443de07 2182
f3d08688 2183L<Announced on 2012-11-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/11/msg195659.html>
1443de07
RS
2184
2185Beatrice, looking like a gypsy queen, smoldered at the foot of a statue
2186of a young physical student. At first glance, the laboratory-gowned
2187scientist seemed to be a perfect servant of nothing but truth. At first
2188glance, one was convinced that nothing but truth could please him as he
2189beamed at his test tube. At first glance, one thought that he was as
2190much above the beastly concerns of mankind as the harmoniums in the
2191caves of Mercury. There, at first glance, was a young man without
2192vanity, without lust — and one accepted at its face value the title Salo
2193had engraved on the statue, "Discovery of Atomic Power."
2194
6720b7ff
FR
2195=head2 v5.17.5 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky"
2196
f3d08688 2197L<Announced on 2012-10-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/10/msg194349.html>
6720b7ff
FR
2198
2199Neither of them noticed the pair of polka-dotted knickers hiding
2200behind the ventilation duct overhead, listening patiently and
2201recording everything.
2202
e6a2c28f
FR
2203=head2 v5.17.4 - Roald Dahl, "Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf"
2204
f3d08688 2205L<Announced on 2012-09-19 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/09/msg192635.html>
e6a2c28f 2206
5814c912
RS
2207 The small girl smiles. One eyelid flickers.
2208 She whips a pistol from her knickers.
2209 She aims it at the creature's head,
2210 And bang bang bang, she shoots him dead.
e6a2c28f 2211
5814c912
RS
2212 A few weeks later, in the wood,
2213 I came across Miss Riding Hood.
2214 But what a change! No cloak of red,
2215 No silly hood upon her head.
2216 She said, "Hello, and do please note
2217 My lovely furry wolfskin coat."
e6a2c28f 2218
4079ea87
SH
2219=head2 v5.17.3 - Kris Ta-belle, "Smoked Perl Onion Soup"
2220
2221L<Announced on 2012-08-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/08/msg190775.html>
2222
2223Preparation:
2224
2225Cut 16 Perl Onions into quarters and put them in a grill smoker rack
2226or a perforated pan over a BBQ using hickory wood chips or Special
2227Blend Smoker Bisquettes. Smoke them for an hour and remove once they
2228look golden brown.
2229Let them cool and put them in the fridge (or freezer) until you are
2230ready to create the soup.
2231
2232Ingredients:
2233
5814c912
RS
2234 16 diced, pre-smoked, Perl Onions
2235 3 tbsp butter
2236 1/4 cup olive oil
2237 2 small garlic cloves, finely minced
2238 1 tsp salt
2239 1 tsp sugar
2240 black pepper to taste
2241 1 cup red wine
2242 1/4 cup all purpose flour
2243 6 cups of beef or vegetable stock
2244 1 cup of thick cream (milk can be used as a substitute)
4079ea87
SH
2245
2246Method:
2247
5814c912
RS
2248 Melt the butter in a pan and then add olive oil.
2249 Heat and add the onions to caramelize over a medium-high heat for up
2250 to half an hour.
2251 Add the garlic, turn down the heat and cook for a further 5 minutes.
2252 Add the salt, pepper and sugar.
2253 Now add the red wine and reduce to a jam like consistency.
2254 Add the flour, stir well and add the stock a cup at a time.
2255 Simmer for 30 minutes, add the cream and heat to almost boiling.
4079ea87
SH
2256
2257Enjoy.
2258
d7846122
TC
2259=head2 v5.17.2 - Terry Pratchet, "The Colour of Magic"
2260
3d76f962 2261L<Announced on 2012-07-21 by TonyC|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/07/msg189828.html>
d7846122
TC
2262
2263‘I knew it,’ said Rincewind. ‘We're in a strong magical field.’
2264
2265Twoflower and Hrun looked around the little hollow where they had made
2266their noonday halt. Then they looked at each other.
2267
2268The horses were quietly cropping the rich grass by the stream. Yellow
2269butterflies skittered among the bushes. There was a smell of thyme
2270and a buzzing of bees. The wild pigs on the spit sizzled gently.
2271
2272Hrun shrugged and went back to oiling his biceps. They gleamed.
2273
2274‘Looks alright to me,’ he said.
2275
2276‘Try tossing a coin,’ said Rincewind.
2277
2278‘What?’
2279
2280‘Go on. Toss a coin.’
2281
2282‘Hokay,’ said Hrun. 'If that gives you any pleasure.’ He reached into
2283his pouch and withdrew a handful of loose change plundered from a
2284dozen realms. With some care he selected a Zchloty leaden
2285quarter-iotum and balanced it on a purple thumbnail.
2286
2287‘You call,’ he said. ‘Heads or—’ he inspected the obverse with
2288an air of intense concentration, ‘some sort of a fish with legs.’
2289
2290‘When it's in the air,’ said Rincewind. Hrun grinned and flicked his thumb.
2291
2292The iotum rose, spinning.
2293
2294‘Edge,’ said Rincewind, without looking at it.
2295
322e634c
JL
2296=head2 v5.17.1 - Rand Miller, "Myst: The Book of Ti'ana"
2297
2298L<Announced on 2012-06-20 by doy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/06/msg188354.html>
2299
2300On their return from Ko'ah, Aitrus had shown her the Book, patiently
2301taking her through page after page, and showing her how such an Age was
2302"made." She had seen at once the differences between this archaic form
2303and the ordinary written speech of the D'ni, noting how it was not
2304merely more elaborate but more specific: a language of precise yet
2305subtle descriptive power. Yet seeing was one thing, believing another.
2306Given all the evidence, her rational mind still fought against accepting
2307it.
2308
dd15390c
Z
2309=head2 v5.17.0 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky"
2310
f51b9d59 2311L<Announced on 2012-05-26 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/05/msg187214.html>
dd15390c
Z
2312
2313`Welcome, comrades!' Burya opened his arms toward the soldier.
2314`Yes it is true! With help from our allies of the Festival, the iron
2315hand of the reactionary junta is about to be overthrown for all time!
2316The new economy is being born; the marginal cost of production has
2317been abolished, and from now on, if any item is produced once, it can
2318be replicated infinitely. From each according to his imagination,
2319to each according to his needs! Join us or better still, bring your
2320fellow soldiers and workers to join us!'
2321
2322There was a sharp bang from the roof of the Corn Exchange, right at the
2323climax of his impromptu speech; heads turned in alarm. Something had
2324broken inside the spork factory and a stream of rainbow-hued plastic
2325implements fountained toward the sky and clattered to the cobblestones
2326on every side, like a harbinger of the postindustrial society to come.
2327Workers and peasants alike stared in open-mouthed bewilderment at this
2328astounding display of productivity, then bent to scrabble in the muck
2329for the brightly colored sporks of revolution. A volley of shots rang
2330out and Burya Rubenstein raised his hands, grinning wildly, to accept
2331the salute of the soldiers from the Skull Hill garrison.
2332
c682aa67
SH
2333=head2 v5.16.3 - Devo, "Freedom of Choice"
2334
2335L<Announced on 2013-03-11 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/03/msg200009.html>
2336
2337 A victim of collision on the open sea
2338 Nobody ever said that life was free
2339 Sink, swim, go down with the ship
2340 But use your freedom of choice
2341
2342=head2 v5.16.2 - Stanislaw Lem, "The Cyberiad", Trurl's Machine
2343
2344L<Announced on 2012-11-01 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/11/msg194915.html>
2345
2346Once upon a time Trurl the constructor built an eight-story thinking
2347machine. When it was finished, he gave it a coat of white paint,
2348trimmed the edges in lavender, stepped back, squinted, then added a
2349little curlicue on the front and, where one might imagine the forehead
2350to be, a few pale orange polkadots. Extremely pleased with himself,
2351he whistled an air and, as is always done on such occasions, asked it
2352the ritual question of how much is two plus two.
2353
2354The machine stirred. Its tubes began to glow, its coils warmed up,
2355current coursed through all its circuits like a waterfall,
2356transformers hummed and throbbed, there was a clanging, and a
2357chugging, and such an ungodly racket that Trurl began to think of
2358adding a special mentation muffler. Meanwhile the machine labored on,
2359as if it had been given the most difficult problem in the Universe to
2360solve; the ground shook, the sand slid underfoot from the vibration,
2361valves popped like champagne corks, the relays nearly gave way under
2362the strain. At last, when Trurl had grown extremely impatient, the
2363machine ground to a halt and said in a voice like thunder: SEVEN!
2364
2ee7da68 2365=head2 v5.16.1 - Emerald Rose, "Never Split The Party"
a210cc89 2366
6dab83b1 2367L<Announced on 2012-08-08 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/08/msg190413.html>
a210cc89
RS
2368
2369 Don't you know? You never split the party
2370 Clerics in the back to keep those fighters hale and hearty
2371 The wizard in the middle, where he can shed some light
2372 And you never let that damn thief out of sight…
2373
c33412d7 2374=head2 v5.16.1-RC1 - Tom Moldvay, Foreward to the "Dungeons & Dragons Basic Rulebook"
a210cc89 2375
6dab83b1 2376L<Announced on 2012-08-03 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/08/msg190264.html>
a210cc89
RS
2377
2378I was busy rescuing the captured maiden when the dragon showed up.
2379Fifty feed of scaled terror glared down at us with smoldering red eyes.
2380Tendrils of smoke drifted out from between fangs larger than daggers.
2381The dragon blocked the only exit from the cave.
2382
2383
2384
2385I unwrapped the sword which the mysterious cleric had given me. The
2386sword was golden-tinted steel. Its hilt was set with a rainbow
2387collection of precious gems. I shouted my battle cry and charged
2388
2389My charge caught the dragon by surprise. Its titanic jaws snapped shut
2390inches from my face. I swung the golden sword with both arms. The
2391swordblade bit into the dragon's neck and continued through to the other
2392side. With an earth-shaking crash, the dragon dropped dead at my feet.
2393The magic sword had saved my life and ended the reign of the
2394dragon-tyrant. The countryside was freed and I could return as a hero.
2395
2ee7da68 2396=head2 v5.16.0 - W.H. Auden, "September 1, 1939"
4c4c16b2 2397
6dab83b1 2398L<Announced on 2012-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/05/msg186903.html>
4c4c16b2 2399
a210cc89
RS
2400 All I have is a voice
2401 To undo the folded lie,
2402 The romantic lie in the brain
2403 Of the sensual man-in-the-street
2404 And the lie of Authority
2405 Whose buildings grope the sky:
2406 There is no such thing as the State
2407 And no one exists alone;
2408 Hunger allows no choice
2409 To the citizen or the police;
2410 We must love one another or die.
2411
2ee7da68 2412=head2 v5.15.9 - Bob Dylan, "Blowin' In The Wind"
54fdd2d6 2413
6dab83b1 2414L<Announced on 2012-03-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/03/msg184824.html>
a97faa3d 2415
4ed12d4a
SH
2416 How many roads must a man walk down
2417 Before you call him a man?
2418 Yes, 'n' how many seas must a white dove sail
2419 Before she sleeps in the sand?
2420 Yes, 'n' how many times must the cannonballs fly
2421 Before they're forever banned?
2422 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
2423 The answer is blowin' in the wind
2424
2425 How many years can a mountain exist
2426 Before it's washed to the sea?
2427 Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
2428 Before they're allowed to be free?
2429 Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head
2430 Pretending he just doesn't see?
2431 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
2432 The answer is blowin' in the wind
2433
2434 How many times must a man look up
2435 Before he can see the sky?
2436 Yes, 'n' how many ears must one man have
2437 Before he can hear people cry?
2438 Yes, 'n' how many deaths will it take till he knows
2439 That too many people have died?
2440 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
2441 The answer is blowin' in the wind
54fdd2d6 2442
2ee7da68 2443=head2 v5.15.8 - The KLF, "The Manual-How To Have A Number One The Easy Way"
1f9d7ff5 2444
6dab83b1 2445L<Announced on 2012-02-20 by Max Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/02/msg183919.html>
1f9d7ff5
MM
2446
2447 "Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
2448 Doctor Who, in the Tardis
2449 Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
2450 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who
2451 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who"
2452
2453Gibberish of course, but every lad in the country under a certain
2454age related instinctively to what it was about. The ones slightly
2455older needed a couple of pints inside them to clear away the mind
2456debris left by the passing years before it made sense. As for
2457girls and our chorus, we think they must have seen it as pure crap.
2458A fact that must have limited to zero our chances of staying at The
2459Top for more than one week.
2460
2461Stock, Aitkin and Waterman, however, are kings of writing chorus
2462lyrics that go straight to the emotional heart of the 7" single
2463buying girls in this country. Their most successful records will kick
2464into the chorus with a line which encapsulates the entire emotional
2465meaning of the song. This will obviously be used as the title. As
2466soon as Rick Astley hit the first line of the chorus on his debut
2467single it was all over - the Number One position was guaranteed:
2468
2469 "I'm never going to give you up"
2470
2ee7da68 2471=head2 v5.15.7 - Penelope Lively, "The Voyage of QV66"
cf6bc744 2472
6dab83b1 2473L<Announced on 2012-01-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/01/msg182230.html>
cf6bc744
CBW
2474
2475"Laboratories," announced Henry. "Kindly don't touch anything."
2476
2477He led us into a long low brick shed. Outside there was a
2478notice on a piece of board, crudely printed in red paint,
2479which said GRATE SIENCE DISCOVERYS DONE HERE SSSH! BRING YOUR
2480OWN BUKKIT NO PINCHING ANYWUN ELSE'S EXPERRYMENTS CANTEEN OPEN
2481ALL DAY CHIMPS ONLY.
2482
2483There were a lot of large black monkeys inside, all intently
2484busy on what they were doing. Some of them were pouring stuff
2485out of bottles into buckets and carefully stirring the ensuing
2486mixture; others were at work with glass tubes and jars, blowing
2487and measuring and mixing; others were crouched over long benches
2488with tools and heaps of bits and pieces of metal, cutting and
2489bending and constructing. There was a great deal of noise and
2490chatter. Every now and then one of them would give a whoop of
2491excitement and all the others would gather round and jump up and
2492down cheering and applauding.
2493
2494"Chimps," said Henry. "They're awfully clever."
2495
2ee7da68 2496=head2 v5.15.6 - Ursula K. Leguin, "A Wizard of Earthsea"
b0d358f0 2497
6dab83b1 2498L<Announced on 2011-12-20 by Dave Rolsky|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/12/msg180962.html>
b0d358f0
DR
2499
2500Ged had thought that as the prentice of a great mage he would enter at once
2501into the mystery and mastery of power. He would understand the language of the
2502beasts and the speech of the leaves of the forest, he thought, and sway the
2503winds with his word, and learn to change himself into any shape he
2504wished. Maybe he and his master would run together as stags, or fly to Re Albi
2505over the mountain on the wings of eagles.
2506
2507But it was not so at all. They wandered, first down into the Vale and then
2508gradually south and westward around the mountain, given lodging in little
2509villages or spending the night out in the wilderness, like poor
2510journeyman-sorcerers, or tinkers, or beggars. They entered no mysterious
2511domain. Nothing happened. The mage's oaken staff that Ged had watched at first
2512with eager dread was nothing but a stout staff to walk with. Three days went
2513by and four days went by and still Ogion had not spoken a single charm in
2514Ged's hearing, and had not taught him a single name or rune or spell.
2515
2ee7da68 2516=head2 v5.15.5 - Nikolai Gogol, trans. Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky, "The Diary of a Madman"
d0fc7727 2517
6dab83b1 2518L<Announced on 2011-11-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/11/msg179588.html>
d0fc7727
SH
2519
2520This day - is a day of the greatest solemnity! Spain has a king. He has
2521been found. I am that king. Only this very day did I learn of it. I
2522confess, it came to me suddenly in a flash of lightning. I don't understand
2523how I could have thought and imagined that I was a titular councillor. How
2524could such a wild notion enter my head? It's a good thing no one thought of
2525putting me in an insane asylum. Now everything is laid open before me. Now
2526I see everything as on the palm of my hand. And before, I don't understand,
2527before everything around me was in some sort of fog. And all this happens, I
2528think, because people imagine that the human brain is in the head. Not at
2529all: it is brought by a wind from the direction of the Caspian Sea. First
2530off, I announced to Mavra who I am. When she heard that the king of Spain
2531was standing before her, she clasped her hands and nearly died of fright.
2532The stupid woman had never seen a king of Spain before. However, I
2533endeavoured to calm her down and assured her in gracious words of my
2534benevolence and that I was not at all angry that she sometimes polished my
2535boots poorly. They're benighted folk. It's impossible to tell them about
2536lofty matters. She got frightened because she's convinced that all kings of
2537Spain are like Philip II. But I explained to her that there was no
2538resemblance between me and Philip II, and that I didn't have a single
2539Capuchin . . . I didn't go to the office . . . To hell with it! No friends,
2540you won't lure me there now; I'm not going to copy your vile papers!
2541
1542e678
FR
2542=head2 v5.15.4 - Steve Jobs
2543
6dab83b1 2544L<Announced on 2011-10-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/10/msg178412.html>
1542e678
FR
2545
2546A lot of people in our industry haven't had very diverse experiences. So they
2547don't have enough dots to connect, and they end up with very linear solutions
2548without a broad perspective on the problem. The broader one's understanding of
2549the human experience, the better design we will have.
2550
2ee7da68 2551=head2 v5.15.3 - Oscar Wilde, From the preface to "The Picture of Dorian Gray"
607b15aa 2552
6dab83b1 2553L<Announced on 2011-09-20 by Stevan Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177427.html>
ca420de3 2554
4ed12d4a
SH
2555All art is at once surface and symbol. Those who go beneath
2556the surface do so at their peril. Those who read the symbol
2557do so at their peril.
607b15aa 2558
4ed12d4a
SH
2559It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors.
2560Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the
2561work is new, complex, and vital. When critics disagree, the
2562artist is in accord with himself.
607b15aa 2563
4ed12d4a
SH
2564We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as
2565he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless
2566thing is that one admires it intensely.
607b15aa 2567
4ed12d4a 2568All art is quite useless.
607b15aa 2569
2ee7da68 2570=head2 v5.15.2 - Rainer Maria Rilke, trans., C. F. MacIntyre, "Duino", The First Elegy
bfb65171 2571
6dab83b1 2572L<Announced on 2011-08-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/08/msg176067.html>
bfb65171 2573
5814c912
RS
2574 True, it is strange to live no more on earth,
2575 no longer follow the folkways scarecely learned;
2576 not to give roses and other especially auspicious
2577 things the significance of a human future;
2578 to be no more what one was in infinitely anxious hands,
2579 and to put aside even one's name, like a broken plaything.
2580 Strange, to wish wishes no longer. Strange, to see
2581 all that was related fluttering so loosely in space.
2582 And being dead is hard, full of catching-up,
2583 so that finally one feels a little eternity.–
2584 But the living all make the mistake of too sharp discrimination.
2585 Often angels (it's said) don't know if they move
2586 among the quick or the dead. The eternal current
2587 hurtles all ages along with it forever
2588 through both realms and drowns their voices in both.
bfb65171 2589
1889cb12
Z
2590=head2 v5.15.1 - Greg Egan, "Permutation City"
2591
2ccefb8a 2592L<Announced on 2011-07-20 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/07/msg175014.html>
1889cb12
Z
2593
2594Carter held out a hand towards the middle of the room. `See that
2595fountain?' A ten-metre-wide marble wedding cake, topped with a
2596winged cherub wrestling a serpent, duly appeared. Water cascaded
2597down from a gushing wound in the cherub's neck. Carter said, `It's
2598being computed by redundancies in the sketch of the city. I can
2599extract the results, because I know exactly where to look for them --
2600but nobody else would have a hope in hell of picking them out.'
2601
2602Peer walked up to the fountain. Even as he approached, he noticed
2603that the spray was intangible; when he dipped his hand in the water
2604around the base he felt nothing, and the motion he made with his
2605fingers left the foaming surface unchanged. They were spying on
2606the calculations, not interacting with them; the fountain was a
2607closed system.
2608
2609Carter said, `In your case, of course, nobody will need to know
2610the results. Except you -- and you'll know them because you'll
2611/be/ them.'
2612
452ead5e
DG
2613=head2 v5.15.0 - Neil Gaiman, "The Graveyard Book"
2614
2615L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173748.html>
2616
4ed12d4a 2617If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all you will have gained.
452ead5e 2618
c682aa67 2619=head2 v5.14.4 - Arthur C. Clarke, "The Nine Billion Names of God"
b3c5102d 2620
c682aa67 2621L<Announced on 2013-03-11 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/03/msg199988.html>
b3c5102d 2622
c682aa67
SH
2623He began to sing, but gave it up after a while. This vast arena of
2624mountains, gleaming like whitely hooded ghosts on every side, did not
2625encourage such ebullience. Presently George glanced at his watch.
2626
2627'Should be there in an hour,' he called back over his shoulder to
2628Chuck. Then he added, in an afterthought: 'Wonder if the computer's
2629finished its run. It was due about now.'
2630
2631Chuck didn't reply, so George swung round in his saddle. He could just
2632see Chuck's face, a white oval turned towards the sky.
2633
2634'Look,' whispered Chuck, and George lifted his eyes to heaven. (There
2635is always a last time for everything.)
2636
2637Overhead, without any fuss, the stars were going out.
2638
2639=head2 v5.14.3 - William Shakespeare, "As You Like It"
2640
2641L<Announced on 2012-10-12 by Dominic Hargreaves|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/10/msg194057.html>
2642
2643 The poor world is almost six thousand years old, and in all
2644 this time there was not any man died in his own person,
2645 videlicit, in a love-cause. Troilus had his brains dashed
2646 out with a Grecian club; yet he did what he could to die
2647 before, and he is one of the patterns of love. Leander, he
2648 would have lived many a fair year, though Hero had turned
2649 nun, if it had not been for a hot midsummer night; for, good
2650 youth, he went but forth to wash him in the Hellespont and
2651 being taken with the cramp was drowned and the foolish
2652 coroners of that age found it was 'Hero of Sestos.' But these
2653 are all lies: men have died from time to time and worms have
2654 eaten them, but not for love.
2655
2656=head2 v5.14.2 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
2657
2658L<Announced on 2011-09-26 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177618.html>
2659
2660It's not so much that people don't value the programs after they have them--they
2661do value them. But they're not the sort of thing that would ever catch on if
2662they had to overcome the marketing barrier. (I don't yet know if perl will
2663catch on at all--I'm worried enough about it that I specifically included an
2664awk-to-perl translator just to help it catch on.) Maybe it's all just an
2665inferiority complex. Or maybe I don't like to be mercenary.
2666
2667So I guess I'd say that the reason some software comes free is that the
2668mechanism for selling it is missing, either from the work environment, or from
2669the heart of the programmer.
b3c5102d 2670
c684cf36 2671=head2 v5.14.1 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
901b3fdb
LB
2672
2673L<Announced on 2011-06-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173650.html>
2674
2675At this point I'm no longer working for a company that makes me sign
2676my life away, but by now I'm in the habit. Besides, I still harbor
2677the deep-down suspicion that nobody would pay money for what I write,
2678since most of it just helps you do something better that you could
2679already do some other way. How much money would you personally pay
2680to upgrade from readnews to rn? How much money would you pay for
2681the patch program? As for warp, it's a mere game. And anything you
2682can do with perl you can eventually do with an amazing and totally
2683unreadable conglomeration of awk, sed, sh and C.
2684
c684cf36 2685=head2 v5.14.0 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
8b55b028
ZA
2686
2687L<Announced on 2011-05-14 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172326.html>
2688
2689At the start of any project, I'm programming primarily to please
2690myself. (The two chief virtues in a programmer are laziness and
2691impatience.) After a while somebody looks over my shoulder and says,
2692"That's neat. It'd be neater if it did such-and-so." So the thing
2693gets neater. Pretty soon (a year or two) I have an rn, a warp, a patch,
2694or a perl. One of these years I'll have a metaconfig.
2695
2696I then say to myself, "I don't want my life's work to die when this
2697computer is scrapped, so I should let some other people use this. If I
2698ask my company to sell this, it'll never see the light of day, and nobody
2699would pay much for it anyway. If I sell it myself, I'll be in trouble with
2700my company, to whom I signed my life away when I was hired. If I give it
2701away, I can pretend it was worthless in the first place, so my company
2702won't care. In any event, it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission."
2703
2704So a freely distributable program is born.
2705
2706=head2 v5.14.0-RC3 - American Airlines Gate Agent, last call
2707
2708L<Announced on 2011-05-11 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172282.html>
2709
2710This is the last call for flight 1697 with service to Chicago and
2711continuing service to San Francisco. All passengers should already be
2712aboard. If you aren't aboard at this time, you will be denied boarding
2713and your bags will be offloaded.
2714
2ee7da68 2715=head2 v5.14.0-RC2 - Greg Grandin, "Fordlandia: The Rise and Fall of Henry Ford's Forgotten Jungle City"
8b55b028
ZA
2716
2717L<Announced on 2011-05-04 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg171879.html>
2718
2719Over the course of nearly two decades, Ford would spend tens of millions
2720of dollars founding not one but, after the plantation was defastated
2721by leaf blight, two American towns, complete with central squares,
2722sidewalks, indoor plumbing, hospitals, manicured lawns, movie theaters,
2723swimming pools, golf courses, and, of course, Model Ts and As rolling
2724down their paved streets.
2725
2726Back in America, newspapers kept up their drumbeat celebration, only
2727obliquely referencing reports that things were not progressing as the
2728company had hoped. But there was one note of skepticism. In late 1928,
2729the Washington Post ran an editorial that read in its entirety: "Ford will
2730govern a rubber plantation in Brazil larger than North Carolina. This is
2731the first time he has applied quantity production methods to trouble"
2732
2733=head2 v5.14.0-RC1 - Bill Bryson, "In a Sunburned Country"
2734
2735L<Announced on 2011-04-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/04/msg171253.html>
2736
2737But then Australia is such a difficult country to keep track of. On
2738my first visit, some years ago, I passed the time on the long flight
2739reading a history of Australian politics in the twentieth century,
2740wherein I encountered the startling fact that in 1967 the prime minister,
2741Harold Holt, was strolling along a beach in Victoria when he plunged into
2742the surf and vanished. No trace of the poor man was ever seen again.
b86ac955 2743This seemed doubly astounding to me—first that Australia could
8b55b028
ZA
2744just I<lose> a prime minister (I mean, come on) and second that news of
2745this had never reached me.
2746
2ee7da68 2747=head2 v5.13.11 - Walt Whitman, L<"Leaves of Grass"|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leaves_of_Grass>
04496198 2748
f3d08688 2749L<Announced on 2011-03-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/03/msg170206.html>
04496198
FR
2750
2751 When the full-grown poet came,
2752 Out spake pleased Nature (the round impassive globe, with all its
2753 shows of day and night,) saying, He is mine;
2754 But out spake too the Soul of man, proud, jealous and unreconciled,
2755 Nay he is mine alone;
2756 --Then the full-grown poet stood between the two, and took each
2757 by the hand;
c2a00619
KW
2758 And to-day and ever so stands, as blender, uniter, tightly
2759 holding hands,
04496198
FR
2760 Which he will never release until he reconciles the two,
2761 And wholly and joyously blends them.
2762
2ee7da68 2763=head2 v5.13.10 - Egill Skalla-Grímsson, L<"Egils saga Skalla-Grímssonar"|http://www.heimskringla.no/wiki/Egils_saga_Skalla-Gr%C3%ADmssonar>
f1e17f6f 2764
fbc70a9e 2765L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Ævar Arnfjörð Bjarmason|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/02/msg169340.html>
30688243 2766
4ed12d4a
SH
2767 Skalat maðr rúnar rísta,
2768 nema ráða vel kunni.
2769 Þat verðr mörgum manni,
2770 es of myrkvan staf villisk.
2771 Sák á telgðu talkni
2772 tíu launstafi ristna.
2773 Þat hefr lauka lindi
2774 langs ofrtrega fengit.
30688243 2775
79af17bd
AB
2776=head2 v5.13.9 - John F Kennedy, L<Inaugural Address January 20, 1961|http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/John_F._Kennedy%27s_Inaugural_Address>
2777
2778L<Announced on 2011-01-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168335.html>
2779
2780In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been
2781granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I
2782do not shrink from this responsibility -- I welcome it. I do not believe
2783that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other
2784generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this
2785endeavor will light our country and all who serve it. And the glow from
2786that fire can truly light the world.
2787
2788And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you;
2789ask what you can do for your country.
2790
2791My fellow citizens of the world, ask not what America will do for you,
2792but what together we can do for the freedom of man.
2793
2794Finally, whether you are citizens of America or citizens of the world,
2795ask of us here the same high standards of strength and sacrifice which
2796we ask of you. With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history
2797the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth to lead the land we love,
2798asking His blessing and His help, but knowing that here on earth God's
2799work must truly be our own.
2800
94521723
Z
2801=head2 v5.13.8 - Roger Williams, L<"The Fifth Gift"|http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/8/19/21304/8493>
2802
2831a86c
ZA
2803L<Announced on 2010-12-19 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/12/msg167271.html>
2804
94521723
Z
2805The aliens called the box a "matter generator," but we'd be more inclined
2806to call it a matter duplicator. By connecting switches and potentiometers
2807between the copper posts it was possible to make the box mark off two
2808cubic rectangular areas of volume. Make a certain contact, and these
2809areas would be isolated within perfectly reflective fields. They could
2810be expanded or contracted by altering resistances between other posts.
2811As I worked out the user interface I built a little control panel for
2812the device. It was actually a clever way for the aliens to do things;
2813instead of trying to build controls we could use, they built us an
2814interface we could attach to controls that made sense to us. It could
2815also be automated.
2816
2817Once you had made the contact that established the shielded volumes,
2818if you made another certain contact the contents of the first volume
2819were copied to the second. The machine copied metal, plastic, steel,
2820and diamond with equal ease. Copies of copies of copies of copies were
2821indistinguishable from the originals at any magnification, even using
2822techniques like X-ray crystallography.
2823
2ee7da68 2824=head2 v5.13.7 - Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski, "The Matrix"
6b1649d0 2825
2831a86c
ZA
2826L<Announced on 2010-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/11/msg166162.html>
2827
6b1649d0
CBW
2828[Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one]
2829
5814c912 2830 Neo: Whoa. Deja vu.
6b1649d0
CBW
2831
2832[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
2833
5814c912
RS
2834 Trinity: What did you just say?
2835 Neo: Nothing. Just had a little deja vu.
2836 Trinity: What did you see?
2837 Cypher: What happened?
89550e55
RS
2838 Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just
2839 like it.
5814c912
RS
2840 Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat?
2841 Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure.
2842 Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
2843 Neo: What is it?
89550e55
RS
2844 Trinity: A deja vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when
2845 they change something.
6b1649d0 2846
54cc2c9a
TM
2847=head2 v5.13.6 - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore"
2848
2831a86c
ZA
2849L<Announced on 2010-10-20 by Tatsuhiko Miyagawa|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/10/msg165183.html>
2850
54cc2c9a
TM
2851The boy called Crow softly rests a hand on my shoulder, and with that
2852he storm vanishes.
2853
2854"From now on -- no matter what -- you've got to be the world's toughest
2855fifteen-year-old. That's the only way you're going to survive. And in order
2856to do that, you've got to figure out what it means to be tough. You following
2857me?"
2858
2859I keep my eyes closed and don't reply. I just want to sink off into sleep
2860like this, his hand on my shoulder. I hear the faint flutter of wings.
2861
2862"You're going to be the world's toughest fifteen-year-old," Crow whispers
2863as I try to fall asleep. Like he was carving the words in a deep blue tattoo
2864on my heart.
2865
2866(Translated from Japanese by Philip Gabriel)
2867
f6c56125
SH
2868=head2 v5.13.5 - Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, "The Room in the Dragon Volant"
2869
2831a86c
ZA
2870L<Announced on 2010-09-19 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg164238.html>
2871
f6c56125
SH
2872Candle in hand I stepped in. I do not know whether the quality of
2873air, long undisturbed, is peculiar; to me it has always seemed so, and
2874the damp smell of the old masonry hung in this atmosphere. My candle
2875faintly lighted the bare stone wall that enclosed the stair, the foot
2876of which I could not see. Down I went, and a few turns brought me to
2877the stone floor. Here was another door, of the simple, old, oak kind,
2878deep sunk in the thickness of the wall. The large end of the key
2879fitted this. The lock was stiff; I set the candle down upon the
2880stair, and applied both hands; it turned with difficulty, and as it
2881revolved, uttered a shriek that alarmed me for my secret.
2882
2883For some minutes I did not move. In a little time, however, I took
2884courage, and opened the door. The night-air floating in puffed out
2885the candle. There was a thicket of holly and underwood, as dense as a
2886jungle, close about the door. I should have been in pitch-darkness,
2887were it not that through the topmost leaves there twinkled, here and
2888there, a glimmer of moonshine.
2889
2890Softly, lest any one should have opened his window at the sound of the
2891rusty bolt, I struggled through this till I gained a view of the open
2892grounds. Here I found that the brushwood spread a good way up the
2893park, uniting with the wood that approached the little temple I have
806849f8 2894described.
f6c56125 2895
fdea69f9
FR
2896=head2 v5.13.4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
2897
2831a86c
ZA
2898L<Announced on 2010-08-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163150.html>
2899
fdea69f9
FR
2900`How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought Alice;
2901`I might as well be at school at once.' However, she got up, and began to repeat
2902it, but her head was so full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what
2903she was saying, and the words came very queer indeed:--
2904
4ed12d4a
SH
2905 "'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare,
2906 "You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair."
2907 As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose
2908 Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.'
fdea69f9
FR
2909
2910
2911`That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' said the Gryphon.
2912
2913`Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it sounds uncommon
2914nonsense.'
2915
2916Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if
2917anything would ever happen in a natural way again.
2918
2919`I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle.
2920
2921`She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with the next verse.'
2922
2923`But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How could he turn them out
2924with his nose, you know?'
2925
2926`It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was dreadfully puzzled by
2927the whole thing, and longed to change the subject.
2928
0feeb912
DG
2929=head2 v5.13.3 - Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, "Good Omens"
2930
2831a86c
ZA
2931L<Announced on 2010-07-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/07/msg162230.html>
2932
0feeb912
DG
2933Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading towards
2934Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would
2935notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth,
2936for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his
2937sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint.
2938
2939Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was
2940dammned if he wasn't going to finish it in the Bentley as well.
2941Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of
2942motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage
2943Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn't have been able to tell
2944that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it
2945had ever even been a car.
2946
2947There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have
2948been black, where it wasn't a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but
2949this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of
2950flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult
2951re-entry.
2952
2953There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the
2954metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still
2955somhow riding an inch above the road surface this didn't seem to
2956make an awful lot of difference to the suspension.
2957
2958It should have fallen apart miles back.
2959
3c55f444
MT
2960=head2 v5.13.2 - Iain M Banks, "Use of Weapons"
2961
2831a86c
ZA
2962L<Announced on 2010-06-22 by Matt S Trout|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/06/msg161112.html>
2963
51caa79e
DG
2964We deal in the moral equivalent of black holes, where the normal laws -
2965the rules of right and wrong that people imagine apply everywhere else
2966in the universe - break down; beyond those metaphysical event-horizons,
3c55f444
MT
2967there exist ... special circumstances.
2968
2969=head2 v5.13.1 - Miguel de Unamuno, "The Sepulchre of Don Quixote"
d069c093 2970
2831a86c
ZA
2971L<Announced on 2010-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160275.html>
2972
d069c093
RS
2973And if anyone shall come to you and say that he knows how to construct
2974bridges and that perhaps a time will come when you will wish to avail
2975yourself of his science in order to cross over a river, out with him! Out
2976with the engineer! Rivers will be crossed by wading or swimming them, even
2977if half the crusaders drown themselves. Let the engineer go off and build
2978bridges somewhere else, where they are badly wanted. For those who go in
2979quest of the sepulchre, faith is bridge enough.
2980
c7bed260
Z
2981=head2 v5.13.0 - Jules Verne, "A Journey to the Centre of the Earth"
2982
2983L<Announced on 2010-04-20 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg159275.html>
2984
2985The heat still remained at quite a supportable degree. With an
2986involuntary shudder, I reflected on what the heat must have been
2987when the volcano of Sneffels was pouring its smoke, flames, and
2988streams of boiling lava -- all of which must have come up by the
2989road we were now following. I could imagine the torrents of hot
2990seething stone darting on, bubbling up with accompaniments of
2991smoke, steam, and sulphurous stench!
2992
2993"Only to think of the consequences," I mused, "if the old
2994volcano were once more to set to work."
2995
c682aa67
SH
2996=head2 v5.12.5 - William Shakespeare, "Measure for Measure"
2997
2998L<Announced on 2012-11-10 by Dominic Hargreaves|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/11/msg195171.html>
2999
3000 Music oft hath such a charm
3001 To make bad good, and good provoke to harm.
3002
3003=head2 v5.12.4 - William Schwenck Gilbert, "Trial By Jury"
3004
3005L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173725.html>
3006
3007 You cannot eat breakfast all day,
3008 Nor is it the act of a sinner,
3009 When breakfast is taken away,
3010 To turn his attention to dinner;
3011 And it's not in the range of belief,
3012 To look upon him as a glutton,
3013 Who, when he is tired of beef,
3014 Determines to tackle the mutton.
3015 Ah! But this I am willing to say,
3016 If it will appease her sorrow,
3017 I'll marry this lady today,
3018 And I'll marry the other tomorrow!
3019
3020=head2 v5.12.4-RC2 - James Russell Lowell, "Eleanor makes macaroons"
3021
3022L<Announced on 2011-06-15 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173609.html>
3023
3024 Now for sugar, -- nay, our plan
3025 Tolerates no work of man.
3026 Hurry, then, ye golden bees;
3027 Fetch your clearest honey, please,
3028 Garnered on a Yorkshire moor,
3029 While the last larks sing and soar,
3030 From the heather-blossoms sweet
3031 Where sea-breeze and sunshine meet,
3032 And the Augusts mask as Junes, --
3033 Eleanor makes macaroons!
3034
3035=head2 v5.12.4-RC1 - Ogden Nash, "The Clean Plater"
3036
3037L<Announced on 2011-06-08 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173352.html>
3038
3039 Pheasant is pleasant, of course,
3040 And terrapin, too, is tasty,
3041 Lobster I freely endorse,
3042 In pate or patty or pasty.
3043 But there's nothing the matter with butter,
3044 And nothing the matter with jam,
3045 And the warmest greetings I utter
3046 To the ham and the yam and the clam.
3047 For they're food,
3048 All food,
3049 And I think very fondly of food.
3050 Through I'm broody at times
3051 When bothered by rhymes,
3052 I brood
3053 On food.
3054
c7bed260
Z
3055=head2 v5.12.3 - Howard W. Campbell, Jr., "Reflections on Not Participating in Current Events"
3056
3057L<Announced on 2011-01-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168368.html>
3058
3059 I saw a huge steam roller,
3060 It blotted out the sun.
3061 The people all lay down, lay down;
3062 They did not try to run.
3063 My love and I, we looked amazed
3064 Upon the gory mystery.
3065 'Lie down, lie down!' the people cried.
3066 'The great machine is history!'
3067 My love and I, we ran away,
3068 The engine did not find us.
3069 We ran up to a mountain top,
3070 Left history far behind us.
3071 Perhaps we should have stayed and died,
3072 But somehow we don't think so.
3073 We went to see where history'd been,
3074 And my, the dead did stink so.
3075
3076=head2 v5.12.2 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
3077
3078L<Announced on 2010-09-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg163852.html>
3079
3080CPUs. Cayce Pollard Units. That's what Damien calls the clothing
3081she wears. CPUs are either black, white, or gray, and ideally
3082seem to have come into this world without human intervention.
3083
3084What people take for relentless minimalism is a side effect
3085of too much exposure to the reactor-cores of fashion. This
3086has resulted in a remorseless paring-down of what she can and
3087will wear. She is, literally, allergic to fashion. She can
3088only tolerate things that could have been worn, to a general
3089lack of comment, during any year between 1945 and 2000. She's a
3090design-free zone, a one-woman school of and whose very austerity
3091periodically threatens to spawn its own cult.
3092
3093=head2 v5.12.2-RC1 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
3094
3095L<Announced on 2010-08-31 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163670.html>
3096
3097The front page opens, familiar as a friend's living room. A frame-grab
3098from #48 serves as backdrop, dim and almost monochrome, no characters in
3099view. This is one of the sequences that generate comparisons with
3100Tarkovsky. She only knows Tarkovsky from stills, really, though she did
3101once fall asleep during a screening of The Stalker, going under on an
3102endless pan, the camera aimed straight down, in close-up, at a puddle on
3103a ruined mosaic floor. But she is not one of those who think that much
3104will be gained by analysis of the maker's imagined influences. The cult
3105of the footage is rife with subcults, claiming every possible influence.
3106Truffaut, Peckinpah -- The Peckinpah people, among the least likely, are
3107still waiting for the guns to be drawn.
3108
4363636d
DG
3109=head2 v5.12.1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
3110
2831a86c
ZA
3111L<Announced on 2010-05-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160109.html>
3112
4363636d
DG
3113"Now suppose," chortled Dr. Breed, enjoying himself, "that there were
3114many possible ways in which water could crystallize, could freeze.
d517a16a
Z
3115Suppose that the sort of ice we skate upon and put into highballs --
3116what we might call ice-one -- is only one of several types of ice.
4363636d
DG
3117Suppose water always froze as ice-one on Earth because it had never
3118had a seed to teach it how to form ice-two, ice-three, ice-four
3119...? And suppose," he rapped on his desk with his old hand again,
d517a16a
Z
3120"that there were one form, which we will call ice-nine -- a crystal as
3121hard as this desk -- with a melting point of, let us say, one-hundred
4363636d
DG
3122degrees Fahrenheit, or, better still, a melting point of one-hundred-
3123and-thirty degrees."
3124
4363636d
DG
3125=head2 v5.12.1-RC2 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
3126
2831a86c
ZA
3127L<Announced on 2010-05-13 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160066.html>
3128
4363636d
DG
3129San Lorenzo was fifty miles long and twenty miles wide, I learned from
3130the supplement to the New York Sunday Times. Its population was four
3131hundred, fifty thousand souls, "...all fiercely dedicated to the ideals
3132of the Free World."
3133
3134Its highest point, Mount McCabe, was eleven thousand feet above sea
3135level. Its capital was Bolivar, "...a strikingly modern city built on a
3136harbor capable of sheltering the entire United States Navy." The principal
3137exports were sugar, coffee, bananas, indigo, and handcrafted novelties.
3138
2831a86c
ZA
3139=head2 v5.12.1-RC1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
3140
3141L<Announced on 2010-05-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg159971.html>
4363636d 3142
4363636d
DG
3143Which brings me to the Bokononist concept of a wampeter. A wampeter is
3144the pivot of a karass. No karass is without a wampeter, Bokonon tells us,
3145just as no wheel is without a hub. Anything can be a wampeter: a tree,
3146a rock, an animal, an idea, a book, a melody, the Holy Grail. Whatever
3147it is, the members of its karass revolve about it in the majestic chaos
3148of a spiral nebula. The orbits of the members of a karass about their
3149common wampeter are spiritual orbits, naturally. It is souls and not
3150bodies that revolve. As Bokonon invites us to sing:
3151
4ed12d4a
SH
3152 Around and around and around we spin,
3153 With feet of lead and wings of tin . . .
4363636d 3154
4363636d
DG
3155=head2 v5.12.0 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
3156
2831a86c
ZA
3157L<Announced on 2010-04-12 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158820.html>
3158
4363636d
DG
3159'Please would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, for she was
3160not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, 'why
3161your cat grins like that?'
3162
3163'It's a Cheshire cat,' said the Duchess, 'and that's why. Pig!'
3164
3165She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite
3166jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby,
3167and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:--
3168
3169'I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know
3170that cats COULD grin.'
3171
3172'They all can,' said the Duchess; 'and most of 'em do.'
3173
4363636d
DG
3174=head2 v5.12.0-RC5 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
3175
2831a86c
ZA
3176L<Announced on 2010-04-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158720.html>
3177
4363636d
DG
3178'Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly; 'some of the words
3179have got altered.'
3180
3181'It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar decidedly, and
3182there was silence for some minutes.
3183
4363636d
DG
3184=head2 v5.12.0-RC4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
3185
2831a86c
ZA
3186L<Announced on 2010-04-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158567.html>
3187
4363636d
DG
3188'It was much pleasanter at home,' thought poor Alice, 'when one wasn't
3189always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and
3190rabbits. I almost wish I hadn't gone down that rabbit-hole--and yet--and
3191yet--it's rather curious, you know, this sort of life! I do wonder what
3192can have happened to me! When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that
3193kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one!
3194
4363636d
DG
3195=head2 v5.12.0-RC3 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
3196
2831a86c
ZA
3197L<Announced on 2010-04-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158346.html>
3198
4363636d
DG
3199At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them,
3200called out, 'Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL soon make you
3201dry enough!' They all sat down at once, in a large ring, with the Mouse
3202in the middle. Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt
3203sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon.
3204
3205'Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, 'are you all ready? This
3206is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! "William
3207the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was soon submitted
3208to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of late much
3209accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of
d517a16a 3210Mercia and Northumbria --"'
4363636d 3211
2831a86c 3212=head2 v5.12.0-RC2 - no announcement
4363636d 3213
2831a86c 3214Available on CPAN since 2010-04-01.
4363636d 3215
3e340399 3216=head2 v5.12.0-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
4363636d 3217
2831a86c
ZA
3218L<Announced on 2010-03-29 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg158060.html>
3219
4363636d
DG
3220So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the
3221hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of
3222making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and
3223picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran
3224close by her.
3225
3226There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice think it so
3227VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, 'Oh dear! Oh
3228dear! I shall be late!' (when she thought it over afterwards, it
3229occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this, but at the time
3230it all seemed quite natural); but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH
3231OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on,
3232Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had
3233never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to
3234take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the field
3235after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large
3236rabbit-hole under the hedge.
3237
3238In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how
3239in the world she was to get out again.
3240
0e6b8110 3241=head2 v5.12.0-RC0 - no epigraph
4363636d 3242
2831a86c 3243L<Announced on 2020-03-21 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg157761.html>
4363636d 3244
3e340399 3245=head2 v5.11.5 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "Christabel"
4363636d 3246
2831a86c
ZA
3247L<Announced on 2010-02-21 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/02/msg156957.html>
3248
4ed12d4a
SH
3249 A little child, a limber elf,
3250 Singing, dancing to itself,
3251 A fairy thing with red round cheeks,
3252 That always finds, and never seeks,
3253 Makes such a vision to the sight
3254 As fills a father's eyes with light;
3255 And pleasures flow in so thick and fast
3256 Upon his heart, that he at last
3257 Must needs express his love's excess
3258 With words of unmeant bitterness.
3259 Perhaps 'tis pretty to force together
3260 Thoughts so all unlike each other;
3261 To mutter and mock a broken charm,
3262 To dally with wrong that does no harm.
3263 Perhaps 'tis tender too and pretty
3264 At each wild word to feel within
3265 A sweet recoil of love and pity.
3266 And what, if in a world of sin
3267 (O sorrow and shame should this be true!)
3268 Such giddiness of heart and brain
3269 Comes seldom save from rage and pain,
3270 So talks as it's most used to do.
4363636d 3271
4363636d
DG
3272=head2 v5.11.4 - Fyodor Dostoevsky, "Crime and Punishment"
3273
2831a86c
ZA
3274L<Announced on 2010-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/01/msg155848.html>
3275
4363636d
DG
3276And you don't suppose that I went into it headlong like a fool? I went
3277into it like a wise man, and that was just my destruction. And you
3278mustn't suppose that I didn't know, for instance, that if I began to
3279question myself whether I had the right to gain power -- I certainly
3280hadn't the right -- or that if I asked myself whether a human being is a
3281louse it proved that it wasn't so for me, though it might be for a man
3282who would go straight to his goal without asking questions.... If I
3283worried myself all those days, wondering whether Napoleon would have
3284done it or not, I felt clearly of course that I wasn't Napoleon.
3285
4363636d
DG
3286=head2 v5.11.3 - Mark Twain, "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer"
3287
2831a86c
ZA
3288L<Announced on 2009-12-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/12/msg154838.html>
3289
4363636d 3290"Say -- I'm going in a swimming, I am. Don't you wish you could? But of
d517a16a 3291course you'd druther work -- wouldn't you? Course you would!"
4363636d
DG
3292
3293Tom contemplated the boy a bit, and said: "What do you call work?"
3294
3295"Why ain't that work?"
3296
3297Tom resumed his whitewashing, and answered carelessly: "Well, maybe it
3298is, and maybe it aint. All I know, is, it suits Tom Sawyer."
3299
3300"Oh come, now, you don't mean to let on that you like it?"
3301
3302The brush continued to move. "Like it? Well I don't see why I oughtn't
3303to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?"
3304
3305That put the thing in a new light. Ben stopped nibbling his apple. Tom
3306swept his brush daintily back and forth -- stepped back to note the effect
3307-- added a touch here and there-criticised the effect again -- Ben
3308watching every move and getting more and more interested, more and more
3309absorbed. Presently he said: "Say, Tom, let me whitewash a little."
3310
4363636d
DG
3311=head2 v5.11.2 - Michael Marshall Smith, "Only Forward"
3312
f0ccce9b 3313L<Announced on 2009-11-20 by Léon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/11/msg153646.html>
2831a86c 3314
4363636d
DG
3315The streets were pretty quiet, which was nice. They're always quiet here
3316at that time: you have to be wearing a black jacket to be out on the
3317streets between seven and nine in the evening, and not many people in
3318the area have black jackets. It's just one of those things. I currently
3319live in Colour Neighbourhood, which is for people who are heavily into
3320colour. All the streets and buildings are set for instant colourmatch:
3321as you walk down the road they change hue to offset whatever you're
3322wearing. When the streets are busy it's kind of intense, and anyone
3323prone to epileptic seizures isn't allowed to live in the Neighbourhood,
3324however much they're into colour.
3325
4363636d
DG
3326=head2 v5.11.1 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
3327
2831a86c
ZA
3328L<Announced on 2009-10-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg152360.html>
3329
4363636d
DG
3330Milo had been caught red-handed in the act of plundering his countrymen,
3331and, as a result, his stock had never been higher. He proved good as his
3332word when a rawboned major from Minnesota curled his lip in rebellious
3333disavowal and demanded his share of the syndicate Milo kept saying
3334everybody owned. Milo met the challenge by writing the words "A Share"
3335on the nearest scrap of paper and handing it away with a virtuous disdain
3336that won the envy and admiration of almost everyone who knew him. His
3337glory was at a peak, and Colonel Cathcart, who knew and admired his
b10ee209 3338war record, was astonished by the deferential humility with which Milo
4363636d
DG
3339presented himself at Group Headquarters and made his fantastic appeal
3340for more hazardous assignment.
3341
4363636d
DG
3342=head2 v5.11.0 - Mikhail Bulgakov, "The Master and Margarita"
3343
2831a86c
ZA
3344L<Announced on 2009-10-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg151376.html>
3345
4363636d
DG
3346Whispers of an "evil power" were heard in lines at dairy shops, in
3347streetcars, stores, arguments, kitchens, suburban and long-distance
3348trains, at stations large and small, in dachas and on beaches. Needless
3349to say, truly mature and cultured people did not tell these stories
3350about an evil power's visit to the capital. In fact, they even made fun
3351of them and tried to talk sense into those who told them. Nevertheless,
3352facts are facts, as they say, and cannot simply be dismissed without
3353explanation: somebody had visited the capital. The charred cinders of
3354Griboyedov alone, and many other things besides, confirmed it. Cultured
3355people shared the point of view of the investigating team: it was the
3356work of a gang of hypnotists and ventriloquists magnificently skilled in
3357their art.
3358
4363636d
DG
3359=head2 v5.10.1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
3360
dd047fac 3361L<Announced on 2009-08-23 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150172.html>
2831a86c 3362
4363636d
DG
3363'Briefly, sir, I am the Permanent Under-Secretary of State, known as
3364the Permanent Secretary. Woolley here is your Principal Private
3365Secretary. I, too, have a Principal Private Secretary, and he is the
3366Principal Private Secretary to the Permanent Secretary. Directly
3367responsible to me are ten Deputy Secretaries, eighty-seven Under
3368Secretaries and two hundred and nineteen Assistant Secretaries.
3369Directly responsible to the Principal Private Secretaries are plain
3370Private Secretaries. The Prime Minister will be appointing two
3371Parliamentary Under-Secretaries and you will be appointing your own
3372Parliamentary Private Secretary.'
3373
3374'Can they all type?' I joked.
3375
3376'None of us can type, Minister,' replied Sir Humphrey smoothly. 'Mrs
3377McKay types - she is your Secretary.'
3378
3379I couldn't tell whether or not he was joking. 'What a pity,' I said.
3380'We could have opened an agency.'
3381
3382Sir Humphrey and Bernard laughed. 'Very droll, sir,' said Sir
3383Humphrey. 'Most amusing, sir,' said Bernard. Were they genuinely
3384amused at my wit, or just being rather patronising? 'I suppose they
3385all say that, do they?' I ventured.
3386
3387Sir Humphrey reassured me on that. 'Certainly not, Minister,' he
3388replied. 'Not quite all.'
3389
0e6b8110 3390=head2 v5.10.1-RC2 - no epigraph
4363636d 3391
2831a86c 3392L<Announced on 2009-08-18 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150015.html>
3e340399 3393
0e6b8110 3394=head2 v5.10.1-RC1 - no epigraph
4363636d 3395
2831a86c 3396L<Announced on 2009-08-06 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg149498.html>
3e340399 3397
c7bed260 3398=head2 v5.10.0 - Laurence Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
4363636d 3399
c7bed260
Z
3400L<Announced on 2007-12-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/12/msg131636.html>
3401
3402He would often declare, in speaking his thoughts upon the subject, that
3403he did not conceive how the greatest family in England could stand it
3404out against an uninterrupted succession of six or seven short
3405noses.--And for the contrary reason, he would generally add, That it
3406must be one of the greatest problems in civil life, where the same
3407number of long and jolly noses, following one another in a direct line,
3408did not raise and hoist it up into the best vacancies in the kingdom.
3409
3410=head2 v5.10.0-RC2 - no epigraph
3411
3412L<Announced on 2007-11-25 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130978.html>
3413
3414=head2 v5.10.0-RC1 - no epigraph
3415
3416L<Announced on 2007-11-17 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130653.html>
3417
3418=head2 v5.9.5 - no announcement
3419
3420L<Pre-announced on 2007-07-07 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/07/msg126358.html>,
3421available on CPAN with same date, but never actually announced.
3422
3423=head2 v5.9.4 - no epigraph
3424
3425L<Announced on 2006-08-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/08/msg115782.html>
3426
3427=head2 v5.9.3 - no epigraph
3428
3429L<Announced on 2006-01-28 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg109086.html>
3430
3431=head2 v5.9.2 - Thomas Pynchon, "V"
3432
f3d08688 3433L<Announced on 2005-04-01 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/04/msg99421.html>
c7bed260
Z
3434
3435This word flip was weird. Every recording date of McClintic's he'd
3436gotten into the habit of talking electricity with the audio men and
3437technicians of the studio. McClintic once couldn't have cared less
3438about electricity, but now it seemed if that was helping him reach a
3439bigger audience, some digging, some who would never dig, but all
3440paying and those royalties keeping the Triumph in gas and McClintic
3441in J. Press suits, then McClintic ought to be grateful to
3442electricity, ought maybe to learn a little more about it. So he'd
3443picked up some here and there, and one day last summer he got around
3444to talking stochastic music and digital computers with one
3445technician. Out of the conversation had come Set/Reset, which was
3446getting to be a signature for the group. He had found out from this
3447sound man about a two-triode circuit called a flip-flop, which when
3448it turned on could be one of two ways, depending on which tube was
3449conducting and which was cut off: set or reset, flip or flop.
3450
3451"And that," the man said, "can be yes or no, or one or zero. And
3452that is what you might call one of the basic units, or specialized
3453`cells' in a big `electronic brain.' "
3454
3455"Crazy," said McClintic, having lost him back there someplace. But
3456one thing that did occur to him was if a computer's brain could go
3457flip or flop, why so could a musician's. As long as you were flop,
3458everything was cool. But where did the trigger-pulse come from to
3459make you flip?
3460
3461=head2 v5.9.1 - Tom Stoppard, "Arcadia"
3462
f3d08688 3463L<Announced on 2004-03-16 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/03/msg89722.html>
c7bed260
Z
3464
3465Aren't you supposed to have a pony?
3466
3467=head2 v5.9.0 - Doris Lessing, "Martha Quest"
3468
f3d08688 3469L<Announced on 2003-10-27 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/10/msg84147.html>
c7bed260
Z
3470
3471What of October, that ambiguous month
4363636d 3472
4363636d
DG
3473=head2 v5.8.9 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
3474
2831a86c
ZA
3475L<Announced on 2008-12-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/12/msg142571.html>
3476
4363636d
DG
3477Frank and I, unlike the civil servants, were still puzzled that such a
3478proposal as the Europass could even be seriously under consideration by
3479the FCO. We can both see clearly that it is wonderful ammunition for the
3480anti-Europeans. I asked Humphrey if the Foreign Office doesn't realise
3481how damaging this would be to the European ideal?
3482
3483'I'm sure they do, Minister, he said. That's why they support it.'
3484
3485This was even more puzzling, since I'd always been under the impression
3486that the FO is pro-Europe. 'Is it or isn't it?' I asked Humphrey.
3487
3488'Yes and no,' he replied of course, 'if you'll pardon the
3489expression. The Foreign Office is pro-Europe because it is really
3490anti-Europe. In fact the Civil Service was united in its desire to make
3491sure the Common Market didn't work. That's why we went into it.'
3492
3493This sounded like a riddle to me. I asked him to explain further. And
3494basically his argument was as follows: Britain has had the same foreign
3495policy objective for at least the last five hundred years - to create a
3496disunited Europe. In that cause we have fought with the Dutch against
3497the Spanish, with the Germans against the French, with the French and
3498Italians against the Germans, and with the French against the Italians
3499and Germans. [The Dutch rebellion against Phillip II of Spain, the
3500Napoleonic Wars, the First World War, and the Second World War - Ed.]
3501
3502In other words, divide and rule. And the Foreign Office can see no
3503reason to change when it has worked so well until now.
3504
3505I was aware of this, naturally, but I regarded it as ancient history.
3506Humphrey thinks that it is, in fact, current policy. It was necessary
3507for us to break up the EEC, he explained, so we had to get inside. We
3508had previously tried to break it up from the outside, but that didn't
3509work. [A reference to our futile and short-lived involvement in EFTA,
3510the European Free Trade Association, founded in 1960 and which the UK
3511left in 1972 - Ed.] Now that we're in, we are able to make a complete
3512pig's breakfast out of it. We've now set the Germans against the French,
3513the French against the Italians, the Italians against the Dutch... and
3514the Foreign office is terribly happy. It's just like old time.
3515
3516I was staggered by all of this. I thought that the all of us who are
3517publicly pro-European believed in the European ideal. I said this to Sir
3518Humphrey, and he simply chuckled.
3519
3520So I asked him: if we don't believe in the European Ideal, why are we
3521pushing to increase the membership?
3522
3523'Same reason,' came the reply. 'It's just like the United Nations. The
3524more members it has, the more arguments you can stir up, and the more
3525futile and impotent it becomes.'
3526
3527This all strikes me as the most appalling cynicism, and I said so.
3528
3529Sir Humphrey agreed completely. 'Yes Minister. We call it
3530diplomacy. It's what made Britain great, you know.'
3531
4363636d
DG
3532=head2 v5.8.9-RC2 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
3533
dd047fac 3534L<Announced on 2008-12-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/12/msg142422.html>
2831a86c 3535
4363636d
DG
3536There was silence in the office. I didn't know what we were going to do
3537about the four hundred new people supervising our economy drive or the
3538four hundred new people for the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office, or
3539anything! I simply sat and waited and hoped that my head would stop
3540thumping and that some idea would be suggested by someone sometime soon.
3541
3542Sir Humphrey obliged. 'Minister... if we were to end the economy drive
3543and close the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office we could issue an immediate
3544press announcement that you had axed eight hundred jobs.' He had
3545obviously thought this out carefully in advance, for at this moment he
3546produced a slim folder from under his arm. 'If you'd like to approve
3547this draft...'
3548
3549I couldn't believe the impertinence of the suggestion. Axed eight
3550hundred jobs? 'But no one was ever doing these jobs,' I pointed out
3551incredulously. 'No one's been appointed yet.'
3552
3553'Even greater economy,' he replied instantly. 'We've saved eight hundred
3554redundancy payments as well.'
3555
3556'But...' I attempted to explain '... that's just phony. It's dishonest,
3557it's juggling with figures, it's pulling the wool over people's eyes.'
3558
3559'A government press release, in fact.' said Humphrey.
3560
4363636d
DG
3561=head2 v5.8.9-RC1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
3562
2831a86c
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3563L<Announced on 2008-11-10 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg141515.html>
3564
4363636d
DG
3565A jumbo jet touched down, with BURANDAN AIRWAYS written on the side. I
3566was hugely impressed. British Airways are having to pawn their Concordes,
3567and here is this little tiny African state with its own airline, jumbo
3568jets and all.
3569
3570I asked Bernard how many planes Burandan Airways had. 'None,' he said.
3571
3572I told him not to be silly and use his eyes. 'No Minister, it belongs to
3573Freddie Laker,' he said. 'They chartered it last week and repainted it
3574specially.' Apparently most of the Have-Nots (I mean, LDCs) do this - at
3575the opening of the UN General Assembly the runways of Kennedy Airport are
3576jam-packed with phoney flag-carriers. 'In fact,' said Bernard with a sly
3577grin, 'there was one 747 that belonged to nine different African airlines
3578in a month. They called it the mumbo-jumbo.'
3579
3580While we watched nothing much happening on the TV except the mumbo-jumbo
3581taxiing around Prestwick and the Queen looking a bit chilly, Bernard gave
3582me the next day's schedule and explained that I was booked on the night
3583sleeper from King's Cross to Edinburgh because I had to vote in a
3584three-line whip at the House tonight and would have to miss the last
3585plane. Then the commentator, in that special hushed BBC voice used for any
3586occasion with which Royalty is connected, announced reverentially that we
3587were about to catch our first glimpse of President Selim.
3588
3589And out of the plane stepped Charlie. My old friend Charlie Umtali. We
3590were at LSE together. Not Selim Mohammed at all, but Charlie.
3591
3592Bernard asked me if I were sure. Silly question. How could you forget a
3593name like Charlie Umtali?
3594
3595I sent Bernard for Sir Humphrey, who was delighted to hear that we now
3596know something about our official visitor.
3597
3598Bernard's official brief said nothing. Amazing! Amazing how little the FCO
3599has been able to find out. Perhaps they were hoping it would all be on the
3600car radio. All the brief says is that Colonel Selim Mohammed had converted
3601to Islam some years ago, they didn't know his original name, and therefore
3602knew little of his background.
3603
3604I was able to tell Humphrey and Bernard /all/ about his background.
3605Charlie was a red-hot political economist, I informed them. Got the top
3606first. Wiped the floor with everyone.
3607
3608Bernard seemed relieved. 'Well that's all right then.'
3609
3610'Why?' I enquired.
3611
3612'I think Bernard means,' said Sir Humphrey helpfully, 'that he'll know how
3613to behave if he was at an English University. Even if it was the LSE.' I
3614never know whether or not Humphrey is insulting me intentionally.
3615
3616Humphrey was concerned about Charlie's political colour. 'When you said
3617that he was red-hot, were you speaking politically?'
3618
3619In a way I was. 'The thing about Charlie is that you never quite know
3620where you are with him. He's the sort of chap who follows you into a
3621revolving door and comes out in front.'
3622
3623'No deeply held convictions?' asked Sir Humphrey.
3624
3625'No. The only thing Charlie was committed too was Charlie.'
3626
3627'Ah, I see. A politician, Minister.'
3628
4363636d
DG
3629=head2 v5.8.8 - Joe Raposo, "Bein' Green"
3630
f3d08688 3631L<Announced on 2006-01-31 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg109190.html>
2831a86c 3632
4ed12d4a
SH
3633 It's not that easy bein' green
3634 Having to spend each day the color of the leaves
3635 When I think it could be nicer being red or yellow or gold
3636 Or something much more colorful like that
51caa79e 3637
4ed12d4a
SH
3638 It's not easy bein' green
3639 It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things
3640 And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're
3641 Not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water
3642 Or stars in the sky
51caa79e 3643
4ed12d4a
SH
3644 But green's the color of Spring
3645 And green can be cool and friendly-like
3646 And green can be big like an ocean
3647 Or important like a mountain
3648 Or tall like a tree
4363636d 3649
4ed12d4a
SH
3650 When green is all there is to be
3651 It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why?
3652 Wonder I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful
3653 And I think it's what I want to be
4363636d 3654
4363636d
DG
3655=head2 v5.8.8-RC1 - Cosgrove Hall Productions, "Dangermouse"
3656
f3d08688 3657L<Announced on 2006-01-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg108833.html>
2831a86c 3658
4ed12d4a 3659 Greenback: And the world is mine, all mine. Muhahahahaha. See to it!
51caa79e 3660
4ed12d4a 3661 Stiletto: Si, Barone. Subito, Barone.
4363636d 3662
4363636d
DG
3663=head2 v5.8.7 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
3664
f3d08688 3665L<Announced on 2005-05-31 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/05/msg101088.html>
2831a86c 3666
4363636d
DG
3667And now, imagine the triumphant procession: Peter at the head; after him the
3668hunters leading the wolf; and winding up the procession, grandfather and the
3669cat.
3670
3671Grandfather shook his head discontentedly: "Well, and if Peter hadn't caught
51caa79e 3672the wolf? What then?"
4363636d 3673
4363636d
DG
3674=head2 v5.8.7-RC1 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
3675
2831a86c
ZA
3676L<Announced on 2005-05-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/05/msg100711.html>
3677
4363636d
DG
3678And now this is how things stood: The cat was sitting on one branch. The
3679bird on another, not too close to the cat. And the wolf walked round and
3680round the tree, looking at them with greedy eyes.
3681
3682In the meantime, Peter, without the slightest fear, stood behind the
3683gate, watching all that was going on. He ran home,got a strong rope and
3684climbed up the high stone wall.
3685
3686One of the branches of the tree, around which the wolf was walking,
3687stretched out over the wall.
3688
3689Grabbing hold of the branch, Peter lightly climbed over on to the tree.
3690Peter said to the bird: "Fly down and circle round the wolf's head, only
3691take care that he doesn't catch you!".
3692
3693The bird almost touched the wolf's head with its wings, while the wolf
3694snapped angrily at him from this side and that.
3695
3696How that bird teased the wolf, how that wolf wanted to catch him! But
51caa79e 3697the bird was clever and the wolf simply couldn't do anything about it.
4363636d 3698
4363636d
DG
3699=head2 v5.8.6 - A. A. Milne, "The House at Pooh Corner"
3700
f3d08688 3701L<Announced on 2004-11-27 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/11/msg96304.html>
2831a86c 3702
4363636d 3703"Hallo, Pooh," said Piglet, giving a jump of surprise. "I knew it was
51caa79e 3704you."
4363636d 3705
51caa79e 3706"So did I,", said Pooh. "What are you doing?"
4363636d
DG
3707
3708"I'm planting a haycorn, Pooh, so that it can grow up into an oak-tree,
3709and have lots of haycorns just outside the front door instead of having
51caa79e 3710to walk miles and miles, do you see, Pooh?"
4363636d 3711
51caa79e 3712"Supposing it doesn't?" said Pooh.
4363636d
DG
3713
3714"It will, because Christopher Robin says it will, so that's why I'm
3715planting it."
3716
3717"Well," aid Pooh, "if I plant a honeycomb outside my house, then it will
51caa79e 3718grow up into a beehive."
4363636d 3719
51caa79e 3720Piglet wasn't quite sure about this.
4363636d
DG
3721
3722"Or a /piece/ of a honeycomb," said Pooh, "so as not to waste too much.
3723Only then I might only get a piece of a beehive, and it might be the
51caa79e 3724wrong piece, where the bees were buzzing and not hunnying. Bother"
4363636d 3725
51caa79e 3726Piglet agreed that that would be rather bothering.
4363636d
DG
3727
3728"Besides, Pooh, it's a very difficult thing, planting unless you know
3729how to do it," he said; and he put the acorn in the hole he had made,
51caa79e 3730and covered it up with earth, and jumped on it.
4363636d 3731
4363636d
DG
3732=head2 v5.8.6-RC1 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie the Pooh"
3733
2831a86c
ZA
3734L<Announced on 2004-11-11 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/11/msg95786.html>
3735
4363636d
DG
3736"Hallo!" said Piglet, "whare are /you/ doing?"
3737
3738"Hunting," said Pooh.
3739
3740"Hunting what?"
3741
3742"Tracking something," said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously.
3743
3744"Tracking what?" said Piglet, coming closer.
3745
3746"That's just what I ask myself, I ask myself, What?"
3747
3748"What do you think you'll answer?"
3749
3750"I shall have to wait until I catch up with it," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
3751"Now, look there." He pointed to the ground in front of him. "What do
3752you see there?"
3753
3754"Track," said Piglet. "Paw-marks." He gave a little squeak of
3755excitement. "Oh, Pooh!" Do you think it's a--a--a Woozle?"
3756
4363636d
DG
3757=head2 v5.8.5 - wikipedia, "Yew"
3758
f3d08688 3759L<Announced on 2004-07-19 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/07/msg93189.html>
2831a86c 3760
4363636d
DG
3761Yews are relatively slow growing trees, widely used in landscaping and
3762ornamental horticulture. They have flat, dark-green needles, reddish
3763bark, and bear seeds with red arils, which are eaten by thrushes,
3764waxwings and other birds, dispersing the hard seeds undamaged in their
3765droppings. Yew wood is reddish brown (with white sapwood), and very
3766hard. It was traditionally used to make bows, especially the English
3767longbow.
3768
3769In England, the Common Yew (Taxus baccata, also known as English Yew) is
3770often found in churchyards. It is sometimes suggested that these are
3771placed there as a symbol of long life or trees of death, and some are
3772likely to be over 3,000 years old. It is also suggested that yew trees
3773may have a pre-Christian association with old pagan holy sites, and the
3774Christian church found it expedient to use and take over existing sites.
3775Another explanation is that the poisonous berries and foliage discourage
3776farmers and drovers from letting their animals wander into the burial
3777grounds. The yew tree is a frequent symbol in the Christian poetry of
51caa79e 3778T.S. Eliot, especially his Four Quartets.
4363636d 3779
4363636d
DG
3780=head2 v5.8.5-RC2 - wikipedia, "Beech"
3781
f3d08688 3782L<Announced on 2004-07-09 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/07/msg92934.html>
2831a86c 3783
4363636d
DG
3784Beeches are trees of the Genus Fagus, family Fagaceae, including about
3785ten species in Europe, Asia, and North America. The leaves are entire or
3786sparsely toothed. The fruit is a small, sharply-angled nut, borne in
3787pairs in spiny husks. The beech most commonly grown as an ornamental or
3788shade tree is the European beech (Fagus sylvatica).
3789
3790The southern beeches belong to a different but related genus,
3791Nothofagus. They are found in Australia, New Zealand, New Guinea, New
51caa79e 3792Caledonia and South America.
4363636d 3793
4363636d
DG
3794=head2 v5.8.5-RC1 - wikipedia, "Pedunculate Oak" (abridged)
3795
f3d08688 3796L<Announced on 2004-07-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/07/msg92840.html>
2831a86c 3797
4363636d
DG
3798The Pedunculate Oak is called the Common Oak in Britain, and is also
3799often called the English Oak in other English speaking countries It is a
3800large deciduous tree to 25-35m tall (exceptionally to 40m), with lobed
3801and sessile (stalk-less) leaves. Flowering takes place in early to mid
3802spring, and their fruit, called "acorns", ripen by autumn of the same
3803year. The acorns are pedunculate (having a peduncle or acorn-stalk) and
3804may occur singly, or several acorns may occur on a stalk.
3805
3806It forms a long-lived tree, with a large widespreading head of rugged
3807branches. While it may naturally live to an age of a few centuries, many
3808of the oldest trees are pollarded or coppiced, both pruning techniques
3809that extend the tree's potential lifespan, if not its health.
3810
3811Within its native range it is valued for its importance to insects and
3812other wildlife. Numerous insects live on the leaves, buds, and in the
3813acorns. The acorns form a valuable food resource for several small
3814mammals and some birds, notably Jays Garrulus glandarius.
3815
3816It is planted for forestry, and produces a long-lasting and durable
51caa79e 3817heartwood, much in demand for interior and furniture work.
4363636d 3818
4363636d
DG
3819=head2 v5.8.4 - T. S. Eliot, "The Old Gumbie Cat"
3820
f3d08688 3821L<Announced on 2004-04-22 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/04/msg90984.html>
2831a86c 3822
4363636d
DG
3823 I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots;
3824 The curtain-cord she likes to wind, and tie it into sailor-knots.
3825 She sits upon the window-sill, or anything that's smooth and flat:
3826 She sits and sits and sits and sits -- and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat!
3827
3828 But when the day's hustle and bustle is done,
3829 Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun.
3830 She thinks that the cockroaches just need employment
3831 To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment.
3832 So she's formed, from that a lot of disorderly louts,
3833 A troop of well-disciplined helpful boy-scouts,
3834 With a purpose in life and a good deed to do--
3835 And she's even created a Beetles' Tattoo.
3836
4363636d
DG
3837 So for Old Gumbie Cats let us now give three cheers --
3838 On whom well-ordered households depend, it appears.
3839
4363636d
DG
3840
3841=head2 v5.8.4-RC2 - T. S. Eliot, "Macavity: The Mystery Cat"
3842
f3d08688 3843L<Announced on 2004-04-16 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/04/msg90796.html>
2831a86c 3844
4363636d
DG
3845 Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw --
3846 For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
3847 He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
3848 For when they reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
3849
3850 Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
3851 He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
3852 His powers of levitation would make a fakir s