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3=head1 NAME
4
0e6b8110 5perlepigraphs - list of Perl release epigraphs
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6
7=head1 DESCRIPTION
8
0e6b8110 9Many Perl release announcements included an I<epigraph>, a short excerpt
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10from a literary or other creative work, chosen by the pumpking or release
11manager. This file assembles the known list of epigraph for posterity,
12and also links to the release announcements in mailing list archives.
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14I<Note>: these have also been referred to as <epigrams>, but the
15definition of I<epigraph> is closer to the way they have been used.
16Consult your favorite dictionary for details.
17
18=head1 EPIGRAPHS
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20=head2 v5.17.10 - Vernor Vinge, A Fire Upon The Deep
21
22L<Announced on 2013-03-22 by Max Maischein|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-03/msg00908.html>
23
24The archive informed the automation. Data structures were built, recipes
25followed. A local network was built, faster than anything on Straum, but surely
26safe. Nodes were added, modified by other recipes. The archive was a friendly
27place, with hierarchies of translation keys that led them along. Straum itself
28would be famous for this.
29
30Six months passed. A year.
31
32The omniscient view. Not self-aware really. Self-awareness is much over-rated.
33Most automation works far better as a part of a whole, and even if human-
34powerful, it does not need to self-know.
35
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36=head2 v5.16.3 - Devo, Freedom of Choice
37
38L<Announced on 2013-03-11 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-03/msg00414.html>
39
40 A victim of collision on the open sea
41 Nobody ever said that life was free
42 Sink, swim, go down with the ship
43 But use your freedom of choice
44
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45=head2 v5.14.4 - Arthur C. Clarke, The Nine Billion Names of God
46
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47L<Announced on 2013-03-11 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-03/msg00393.html>
48
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49He began to sing, but gave it up after a while. This vast arena of
50mountains, gleaming like whitely hooded ghosts on every side, did not
51encourage such ebullience. Presently George glanced at his watch.
52
53'Should be there in an hour,' he called back over his shoulder to
54Chuck. Then he added, in an afterthought: 'Wonder if the computer's
55finished its run. It was due about now.'
56
57Chuck didn't reply, so George swung round in his saddle. He could just
8af848c0 58see Chuck's face, a white oval turned towards the sky.
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59
60'Look,' whispered Chuck, and George lifted his eyes to heaven. (There
61is always a last time for everything.)
62
63Overhead, without any fuss, the stars were going out.
64
65
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66=head2 v5.17.9 - Douglas Adams, The Hitch-Hikers Guide to the Galaxy
67
68L<Announced on 2013-02-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-02/msg01146.html>
69
70Vogon poetry is of course, the third worst in the universe.
71The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a
72recitation by their poet master Grunthos the Flatulent of
73his poem 'Ode To A Small Lump of Green Putty I Found In My
74Armpit One Midsummer Morning' four of his audience died
75of internal haemorrhaging and the president of the
76Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one
77of his own legs off. Grunthos is reported to have been
78'disappointed' by the poem's reception, and was about to
79embark on a reading of his twelve-book epic entitled
80'My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles' when his own major intestine,
81in a desperate attempt to save life and civilisation,
82leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain.
83
84The very worst poetry of all perished along with its creator
85Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Greenbridge, Essex, England,
86in the destruction of the planet Earth.
87
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88=head2 v5.17.8 - Iain Pears, An Instance of the Fingerpost
89
90L<Announced on 2013-01-20 by Aaron Crane|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2013-01/msg00518.html>
91
92I must here declare myself as someone who does not for a moment subscribe to
93the general view that a willingness to perform oneself is detrimental to the
94dignity of experimental philosophy. There is, after all, a clear distinction
95between labour carried out for financial reward, and that done for the
96improvement of mankind: to put it another way, Lower as a philosopher was
97fully my equal even if he fell away when he became the practising physician.
98I think ridiculous of certain professors of anatomy, who find it beneath
99them to pick up the knife themselves, but merely comment while hired hands
100do the cutting. Sylvius would never have dreamt of sitting on a dais reading
101from an authority while others cut E<0x2014> when he taught, the knife was
102in his hand and the blood spattered his coat. Boyle also did not scruple to
103perform his own experiments and, on one occasion in my presence, even showed
104himself willing to anatomise a rat with his very own hands. Nor was he less
105a gentleman when he had finished. Indeed, in my opinion, his stature was all
106the greater, for in Boyle wealth, humility and curiosity mingled, and the
107world is richer for it.
108
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109=head2 v5.17.7 - R. Scott Bakker, The Darkness That Comes Before
110
111L<Announced on 2012-12-18 by Dave Rolsky|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-12/msg00679.html>
112
113No thought.
114 The boy extinguished. Only a place.
115 This place.
116 Motionless, the Pragma sat facing him, the bare soles of his feet flat against each other, his dark frock scored by the shadows of deep folds, his eyes as empty as the child they watched.
117 A place without breath or sound. A place of sight alone. A place without before or after . . . almost.
118 For the first lances of sunlight careered over the glacier, as ponderous as great tree limbs in the wind. Shadows hardened and light gleamed across the Pragma’s ancient skull.
119 The old man’s left hand forsook his right sleeve, bearing a watery knife. And like a rope in water, his arm pitched outward, fingertips trailing across the blade as the knife swung languidly into the air, the sun skating and the dark shrine plunging across its mirror back . . .
120 And the place where Kellhus had once existed extended an open hand—the blond hairs like luminous filaments against tanned skin—and grasped the knife from stunned space.
121 The slap of pommel against palm triggered the collapse of place into little boy. The pale stench of his body. Breath, sound, and lurching thoughts.
122 I have been legion . . .
123 In his periphery, he could see the spike of the sun ease from the mountain. He felt drunk with exhaustion. In the recoil of his trance, it seemed all he could hear were the twigs arching and bobbing in the wind, pulled by leaves like a million sails no bigger than his hand. Cause everywhere, but amid countless minute happenings—diffuse, useless.
124 Now I understand.
125
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126=head2 v5.17.6 - Kurt Vonnegut, The Sirens of Titan
127
128L<Announced on 2012-11-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-11/msg00760.html>
129
130Beatrice, looking like a gypsy queen, smoldered at the foot of a statue
131of a young physical student. At first glance, the laboratory-gowned
132scientist seemed to be a perfect servant of nothing but truth. At first
133glance, one was convinced that nothing but truth could please him as he
134beamed at his test tube. At first glance, one thought that he was as
135much above the beastly concerns of mankind as the harmoniums in the
136caves of Mercury. There, at first glance, was a young man without
137vanity, without lust — and one accepted at its face value the title Salo
138had engraved on the statue, "Discovery of Atomic Power."
139
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140=head2 v5.12.5 - William Shakespeare, Measure for Measure
141
142Announced on 2012-11-10 by Dominic Hargreaves
143
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144 Music oft hath such a charm
145 To make bad good, and good provoke to harm.
87af396a 146
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147=head2 v5.16.2 - Stanislaw Lem, The Cyberiad, Trurl's Machine
148
149L<Announced on 2012-11-01 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-11/msg00017.html>
150
151Once upon a time Trurl the constructor built an eight-story thinking
152machine. When it was finished, he gave it a coat of white paint,
153trimmed the edges in lavender, stepped back, squinted, then added a
154little curlicue on the front and, where one might imagine the forehead
155to be, a few pale orange polkadots. Extremely pleased with himself,
e4a5e942 156he whistled an air and, as is always done on such occasions, asked it
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157the ritual question of how much is two plus two.
158
159The machine stirred. Its tubes began to glow, its coils warmed up,
160current coursed through all its circuits like a waterfall,
161transformers hummed and throbbed, there was a clanging, and a
162chugging, and such an ungodly racket that Trurl began to think of
163adding a special mentation muffler. Meanwhile the machine labored on,
164as if it had been given the most difficult problem in the Universe to
165solve; the ground shook, the sand slid underfoot from the vibration,
166valves popped like champagne corks, the relays nearly gave way under
167the strain. At last, when Trurl had grown extremely impatient, the
168machine ground to a halt and said in a voice like thunder: SEVEN!
169
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170=head2 v5.17.5 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky"
171
bc9f67ba 172L<Announced on 2012-10-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-10/msg01007.html>
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173
174Neither of them noticed the pair of polka-dotted knickers hiding
175behind the ventilation duct overhead, listening patiently and
176recording everything.
177
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178=head2 v5.17.4 - Roald Dahl, "Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf"
179
180L<Announced on 2012-09-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-09/msg01226.html>
181
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182 The small girl smiles. One eyelid flickers.
183 She whips a pistol from her knickers.
184 She aims it at the creature's head,
185 And bang bang bang, she shoots him dead.
e6a2c28f 186
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187 A few weeks later, in the wood,
188 I came across Miss Riding Hood.
189 But what a change! No cloak of red,
190 No silly hood upon her head.
191 She said, "Hello, and do please note
192 My lovely furry wolfskin coat."
e6a2c28f 193
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194=head2 v5.17.3 - Kris Ta-belle, "Smoked Perl Onion Soup"
195
196L<Announced on 2012-08-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/08/msg190775.html>
197
198Preparation:
199
200Cut 16 Perl Onions into quarters and put them in a grill smoker rack
201or a perforated pan over a BBQ using hickory wood chips or Special
202Blend Smoker Bisquettes. Smoke them for an hour and remove once they
203look golden brown.
204Let them cool and put them in the fridge (or freezer) until you are
205ready to create the soup.
206
207Ingredients:
208
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209 16 diced, pre-smoked, Perl Onions
210 3 tbsp butter
211 1/4 cup olive oil
212 2 small garlic cloves, finely minced
213 1 tsp salt
214 1 tsp sugar
215 black pepper to taste
216 1 cup red wine
217 1/4 cup all purpose flour
218 6 cups of beef or vegetable stock
219 1 cup of thick cream (milk can be used as a substitute)
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220
221Method:
222
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223 Melt the butter in a pan and then add olive oil.
224 Heat and add the onions to caramelize over a medium-high heat for up
225 to half an hour.
226 Add the garlic, turn down the heat and cook for a further 5 minutes.
227 Add the salt, pepper and sugar.
228 Now add the red wine and reduce to a jam like consistency.
229 Add the flour, stir well and add the stock a cup at a time.
230 Simmer for 30 minutes, add the cream and heat to almost boiling.
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231
232Enjoy.
233
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234=head2 v5.17.2 - Terry Pratchet, "The Colour of Magic"
235
3d76f962 236L<Announced on 2012-07-21 by TonyC|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/07/msg189828.html>
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237
238‘I knew it,’ said Rincewind. ‘We're in a strong magical field.’
239
240Twoflower and Hrun looked around the little hollow where they had made
241their noonday halt. Then they looked at each other.
242
243The horses were quietly cropping the rich grass by the stream. Yellow
244butterflies skittered among the bushes. There was a smell of thyme
245and a buzzing of bees. The wild pigs on the spit sizzled gently.
246
247Hrun shrugged and went back to oiling his biceps. They gleamed.
248
249‘Looks alright to me,’ he said.
250
251‘Try tossing a coin,’ said Rincewind.
252
253‘What?’
254
255‘Go on. Toss a coin.’
256
257‘Hokay,’ said Hrun. 'If that gives you any pleasure.’ He reached into
258his pouch and withdrew a handful of loose change plundered from a
259dozen realms. With some care he selected a Zchloty leaden
260quarter-iotum and balanced it on a purple thumbnail.
261
262‘You call,’ he said. ‘Heads or—’ he inspected the obverse with
263an air of intense concentration, ‘some sort of a fish with legs.’
264
265‘When it's in the air,’ said Rincewind. Hrun grinned and flicked his thumb.
266
267The iotum rose, spinning.
268
269‘Edge,’ said Rincewind, without looking at it.
270
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271=head2 v5.17.1 - Rand Miller, "Myst: The Book of Ti'ana"
272
273L<Announced on 2012-06-20 by doy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/06/msg188354.html>
274
275On their return from Ko'ah, Aitrus had shown her the Book, patiently
276taking her through page after page, and showing her how such an Age was
277"made." She had seen at once the differences between this archaic form
278and the ordinary written speech of the D'ni, noting how it was not
279merely more elaborate but more specific: a language of precise yet
280subtle descriptive power. Yet seeing was one thing, believing another.
281Given all the evidence, her rational mind still fought against accepting
282it.
283
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284=head2 v5.17.0 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky"
285
f51b9d59 286L<Announced on 2012-05-26 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/05/msg187214.html>
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287
288`Welcome, comrades!' Burya opened his arms toward the soldier.
289`Yes it is true! With help from our allies of the Festival, the iron
290hand of the reactionary junta is about to be overthrown for all time!
291The new economy is being born; the marginal cost of production has
292been abolished, and from now on, if any item is produced once, it can
293be replicated infinitely. From each according to his imagination,
294to each according to his needs! Join us or better still, bring your
295fellow soldiers and workers to join us!'
296
297There was a sharp bang from the roof of the Corn Exchange, right at the
298climax of his impromptu speech; heads turned in alarm. Something had
299broken inside the spork factory and a stream of rainbow-hued plastic
300implements fountained toward the sky and clattered to the cobblestones
301on every side, like a harbinger of the postindustrial society to come.
302Workers and peasants alike stared in open-mouthed bewilderment at this
303astounding display of productivity, then bent to scrabble in the muck
304for the brightly colored sporks of revolution. A volley of shots rang
305out and Burya Rubenstein raised his hands, grinning wildly, to accept
306the salute of the soldiers from the Skull Hill garrison.
307
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308=head2 v5.16.1 - Emerald Rose - Never Split The Party
309
310L<Announced on 2012-08-08 by Ricardo
311Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-08/msg00307.html>
312
313 Don't you know? You never split the party
314 Clerics in the back to keep those fighters hale and hearty
315 The wizard in the middle, where he can shed some light
316 And you never let that damn thief out of sight…
317
318 -- Emerald Rose, Never Split The Party
319
320=head2 v5.16.1 RC1 - Tom Moldvay - Dungeons & Dragons
321
322L<Announced on 2012-08-03 by Ricardo
323Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-08/msg00157.html>
324
325I was busy rescuing the captured maiden when the dragon showed up.
326Fifty feed of scaled terror glared down at us with smoldering red eyes.
327Tendrils of smoke drifted out from between fangs larger than daggers.
328The dragon blocked the only exit from the cave.
329
330
331
332I unwrapped the sword which the mysterious cleric had given me. The
333sword was golden-tinted steel. Its hilt was set with a rainbow
334collection of precious gems. I shouted my battle cry and charged
335
336My charge caught the dragon by surprise. Its titanic jaws snapped shut
337inches from my face. I swung the golden sword with both arms. The
338swordblade bit into the dragon's neck and continued through to the other
339side. With an earth-shaking crash, the dragon dropped dead at my feet.
340The magic sword had saved my life and ended the reign of the
341dragon-tyrant. The countryside was freed and I could return as a hero.
342
343 -- Tom Moldvay, Foreward to the Dungeons & Dragons Basic Rulebook
344
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345=head2 v5.16.0 - W.H. Auden - September 1, 1939
346
347L<Announced on 2012-05-20 by Ricardo
348Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2012-05/msg00728.html>
349
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350 All I have is a voice
351 To undo the folded lie,
352 The romantic lie in the brain
353 Of the sensual man-in-the-street
354 And the lie of Authority
355 Whose buildings grope the sky:
356 There is no such thing as the State
357 And no one exists alone;
358 Hunger allows no choice
359 To the citizen or the police;
360 We must love one another or die.
361
362 -- W.H. Auden, September 1, 1939
4c4c16b2 363
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364=head2 v5.15.9 - Bob Dylan - Blowin' In The Wind
365
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366L<Announced on 2012-03-20 by
367Abigail|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/184824>
368
369 How many roads must a man walk down
370 Before you call him a man?
371 Yes, 'n' how many seas must a white dove sail
372 Before she sleeps in the sand?
373 Yes, 'n' how many times must the cannonballs fly
374 Before they're forever banned?
375 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
376 The answer is blowin' in the wind
377
378 How many years can a mountain exist
379 Before it's washed to the sea?
380 Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
381 Before they're allowed to be free?
382 Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head
383 Pretending he just doesn't see?
384 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
385 The answer is blowin' in the wind
386
387 How many times must a man look up
388 Before he can see the sky?
389 Yes, 'n' how many ears must one man have
390 Before he can hear people cry?
391 Yes, 'n' how many deaths will it take till he knows
392 That too many people have died?
393 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
394 The answer is blowin' in the wind
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395
396 -- Bob Dylan, Spring 1962
397
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398=head2 v5.15.8 - The KLF - The Manual-How To Have A Number One The Easy Way
399
400L<Announced on 2012-02-20 by Max
401Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/02/msg183919.html>
402
403 "Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
404 Doctor Who, in the Tardis
405 Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
406 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who
407 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who"
408
409Gibberish of course, but every lad in the country under a certain
410age related instinctively to what it was about. The ones slightly
411older needed a couple of pints inside them to clear away the mind
412debris left by the passing years before it made sense. As for
413girls and our chorus, we think they must have seen it as pure crap.
414A fact that must have limited to zero our chances of staying at The
415Top for more than one week.
416
417Stock, Aitkin and Waterman, however, are kings of writing chorus
418lyrics that go straight to the emotional heart of the 7" single
419buying girls in this country. Their most successful records will kick
420into the chorus with a line which encapsulates the entire emotional
421meaning of the song. This will obviously be used as the title. As
422soon as Rick Astley hit the first line of the chorus on his debut
423single it was all over - the Number One position was guaranteed:
424
425 "I'm never going to give you up"
426
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427=head2 v5.15.7 - Penelope Lively, The Voyage of QV66
428
429L<Announced on 2012-01-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams
430|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/01/msg182230.html>
431
432"Laboratories," announced Henry. "Kindly don't touch anything."
433
434He led us into a long low brick shed. Outside there was a
435notice on a piece of board, crudely printed in red paint,
436which said GRATE SIENCE DISCOVERYS DONE HERE SSSH! BRING YOUR
437OWN BUKKIT NO PINCHING ANYWUN ELSE'S EXPERRYMENTS CANTEEN OPEN
438ALL DAY CHIMPS ONLY.
439
440There were a lot of large black monkeys inside, all intently
441busy on what they were doing. Some of them were pouring stuff
442out of bottles into buckets and carefully stirring the ensuing
443mixture; others were at work with glass tubes and jars, blowing
444and measuring and mixing; others were crouched over long benches
445with tools and heaps of bits and pieces of metal, cutting and
446bending and constructing. There was a great deal of noise and
447chatter. Every now and then one of them would give a whoop of
448excitement and all the others would gather round and jump up and
449down cheering and applauding.
450
451"Chimps," said Henry. "They're awfully clever."
452
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453=head2 v5.15.6 - Ursula K. Leguin, A Wizard of Earthsea
454
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455L<Announced on 2011-12-20 by Dave
456Rolsky|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/12/msg180962.html>
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457
458Ged had thought that as the prentice of a great mage he would enter at once
459into the mystery and mastery of power. He would understand the language of the
460beasts and the speech of the leaves of the forest, he thought, and sway the
461winds with his word, and learn to change himself into any shape he
462wished. Maybe he and his master would run together as stags, or fly to Re Albi
463over the mountain on the wings of eagles.
464
465But it was not so at all. They wandered, first down into the Vale and then
466gradually south and westward around the mountain, given lodging in little
467villages or spending the night out in the wilderness, like poor
468journeyman-sorcerers, or tinkers, or beggars. They entered no mysterious
469domain. Nothing happened. The mage's oaken staff that Ged had watched at first
470with eager dread was nothing but a stout staff to walk with. Three days went
471by and four days went by and still Ogion had not spoken a single charm in
472Ged's hearing, and had not taught him a single name or rune or spell.
473
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474=head2 v5.15.5 - Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman
475
476L<Announced on 2011-11-20 by Steve
477Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/11/msg179588.html>
478
479This day - is a day of the greatest solemnity! Spain has a king. He has
480been found. I am that king. Only this very day did I learn of it. I
481confess, it came to me suddenly in a flash of lightning. I don't understand
482how I could have thought and imagined that I was a titular councillor. How
483could such a wild notion enter my head? It's a good thing no one thought of
484putting me in an insane asylum. Now everything is laid open before me. Now
485I see everything as on the palm of my hand. And before, I don't understand,
486before everything around me was in some sort of fog. And all this happens, I
487think, because people imagine that the human brain is in the head. Not at
488all: it is brought by a wind from the direction of the Caspian Sea. First
489off, I announced to Mavra who I am. When she heard that the king of Spain
490was standing before her, she clasped her hands and nearly died of fright.
491The stupid woman had never seen a king of Spain before. However, I
492endeavoured to calm her down and assured her in gracious words of my
493benevolence and that I was not at all angry that she sometimes polished my
494boots poorly. They're benighted folk. It's impossible to tell them about
495lofty matters. She got frightened because she's convinced that all kings of
496Spain are like Philip II. But I explained to her that there was no
497resemblance between me and Philip II, and that I didn't have a single
498Capuchin . . . I didn't go to the office . . . To hell with it! No friends,
499you won't lure me there now; I'm not going to copy your vile papers!
500
501 -- Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman,
502 trans. Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky
503
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504=head2 v5.15.4 - Steve Jobs
505
506L<Announced on 2011-10-20 by Florian
507Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/10/msg178412.html>
508
509A lot of people in our industry haven't had very diverse experiences. So they
510don't have enough dots to connect, and they end up with very linear solutions
511without a broad perspective on the problem. The broader one's understanding of
512the human experience, the better design we will have.
513
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514=head2 v5.14.3 - William Shakespeare, As You Like It
515
0bce251c 516L<Announced on 2012-10-12 by Dominic Hargreaves|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/10/msg194057.html>
413f5093
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517
518 The poor world is almost six thousand years old, and in all
519 this time there was not any man died in his own person,
520 videlicit, in a love-cause. Troilus had his brains dashed
521 out with a Grecian club; yet he did what he could to die
522 before, and he is one of the patterns of love. Leander, he
523 would have lived many a fair year, though Hero had turned
524 nun, if it had not been for a hot midsummer night; for, good
525 youth, he went but forth to wash him in the Hellespont and
526 being taken with the cramp was drowned and the foolish
527 coroners of that age found it was 'Hero of Sestos.' But these
528 are all lies: men have died from time to time and worms have
529 eaten them, but not for love.
530
531 -- As You Like It, William Shakespeare
532
c684cf36 533=head2 v5.14.2 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
21677d22
FR
534
535L<Announced on 2011-09-26 by Florian
536Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177618.html>
537
538
539It's not so much that people don't value the programs after they have them--they
540do value them. But they're not the sort of thing that would ever catch on if
541they had to overcome the marketing barrier. (I don't yet know if perl will
542catch on at all--I'm worried enough about it that I specifically included an
543awk-to-perl translator just to help it catch on.) Maybe it's all just an
544inferiority complex. Or maybe I don't like to be mercenary.
545
546So I guess I'd say that the reason some software comes free is that the
547mechanism for selling it is missing, either from the work environment, or from
548the heart of the programmer.
549
550
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551=head2 v5.15.3 - Oscar Wilde, All Art is Quite Useless
552
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SL
553L<Announced on 2011-09-20 by Stevan
554Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177427.html>
555
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556 All art is at once surface and symbol. Those who go beneath
557 the surface do so at their peril. Those who read the symbol
558 do so at their peril.
559
560 It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors.
561 Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the
562 work is new, complex, and vital. When critics disagree, the
563 artist is in accord with himself.
564
565 We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as
566 he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless
567 thing is that one admires it intensely.
568
569 All art is quite useless.
570
571 -- Oscar Wilde, From the preface to The Picture of Dorian Gray
572
573
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574=head2 v5.15.2 - Rainer Maria Rilke, The Third Duina Elegy
575
576L<Announced on 2011-08-20 by Ricardo
577Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-08/msg00694.html>
578
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579 True, it is strange to live no more on earth,
580 no longer follow the folkways scarecely learned;
581 not to give roses and other especially auspicious
582 things the significance of a human future;
583 to be no more what one was in infinitely anxious hands,
584 and to put aside even one's name, like a broken plaything.
585 Strange, to wish wishes no longer. Strange, to see
586 all that was related fluttering so loosely in space.
587 And being dead is hard, full of catching-up,
588 so that finally one feels a little eternity.–
589 But the living all make the mistake of too sharp discrimination.
590 Often angels (it's said) don't know if they move
591 among the quick or the dead. The eternal current
592 hurtles all ages along with it forever
593 through both realms and drowns their voices in both.
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594
595 -- Rainer Maria Rilke, Duino, The First Elegy
596 trans., C. F. MacIntyre
597
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598=head2 v5.15.1 - Greg Egan, "Permutation City"
599
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601
602Carter held out a hand towards the middle of the room. `See that
603fountain?' A ten-metre-wide marble wedding cake, topped with a
604winged cherub wrestling a serpent, duly appeared. Water cascaded
605down from a gushing wound in the cherub's neck. Carter said, `It's
606being computed by redundancies in the sketch of the city. I can
607extract the results, because I know exactly where to look for them --
608but nobody else would have a hope in hell of picking them out.'
609
610Peer walked up to the fountain. Even as he approached, he noticed
611that the spray was intangible; when he dipped his hand in the water
612around the base he felt nothing, and the motion he made with his
613fingers left the foaming surface unchanged. They were spying on
614the calculations, not interacting with them; the fountain was a
615closed system.
616
617Carter said, `In your case, of course, nobody will need to know
618the results. Except you -- and you'll know them because you'll
619/be/ them.'
620
452ead5e
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621=head2 v5.15.0 - Neil Gaiman, "The Graveyard Book"
622
623L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173748.html>
624
625 If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all
626 you will have gained.
627
b3c5102d
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628=head2 v5.12.4 - William Schwenck Gilbert, "Trial By Jury"
629
630L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173725.html>
631
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632 You cannot eat breakfast all day,
633 Nor is it the act of a sinner,
634 When breakfast is taken away,
635 To turn his attention to dinner;
636 And it's not in the range of belief,
637 To look upon him as a glutton,
638 Who, when he is tired of beef,
639 Determines to tackle the mutton.
640 Ah! But this I am willing to say,
641 If it will appease her sorrow,
642 I'll marry this lady today,
643 And I'll marry the other tomorrow!
b3c5102d 644
c684cf36 645=head2 v5.14.1 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
901b3fdb
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646
647L<Announced on 2011-06-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173650.html>
648
649At this point I'm no longer working for a company that makes me sign
650my life away, but by now I'm in the habit. Besides, I still harbor
651the deep-down suspicion that nobody would pay money for what I write,
652since most of it just helps you do something better that you could
653already do some other way. How much money would you personally pay
654to upgrade from readnews to rn? How much money would you pay for
655the patch program? As for warp, it's a mere game. And anything you
656can do with perl you can eventually do with an amazing and totally
657unreadable conglomeration of awk, sed, sh and C.
658
659=head2 v5.12.4-RC2 - James Russell Lowell, "Eleanor makes macaroons"
660
661L<Announced on 2011-06-15 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173609.html>
662
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663 Now for sugar, -- nay, our plan
664 Tolerates no work of man.
665 Hurry, then, ye golden bees;
666 Fetch your clearest honey, please,
667 Garnered on a Yorkshire moor,
668 While the last larks sing and soar,
669 From the heather-blossoms sweet
670 Where sea-breeze and sunshine meet,
671 And the Augusts mask as Junes, --
672 Eleanor makes macaroons!
901b3fdb 673
7fdfa5b9
LB
674=head2 v5.12.4-RC1 - Ogden Nash, "The Clean Plater"
675
676L<Announced on 2011-06-08 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173352.html>
677
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678 Pheasant is pleasant, of course,
679 And terrapin, too, is tasty,
680 Lobster I freely endorse,
681 In pate or patty or pasty.
682 But there's nothing the matter with butter,
683 And nothing the matter with jam,
684 And the warmest greetings I utter
685 To the ham and the yam and the clam.
686 For they're food,
687 All food,
688 And I think very fondly of food.
689 Through I'm broody at times
690 When bothered by rhymes,
691 I brood
692 On food.
7fdfa5b9 693
c684cf36 694=head2 v5.14.0 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
8b55b028
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695
696L<Announced on 2011-05-14 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172326.html>
697
698At the start of any project, I'm programming primarily to please
699myself. (The two chief virtues in a programmer are laziness and
700impatience.) After a while somebody looks over my shoulder and says,
701"That's neat. It'd be neater if it did such-and-so." So the thing
702gets neater. Pretty soon (a year or two) I have an rn, a warp, a patch,
703or a perl. One of these years I'll have a metaconfig.
704
705I then say to myself, "I don't want my life's work to die when this
706computer is scrapped, so I should let some other people use this. If I
707ask my company to sell this, it'll never see the light of day, and nobody
708would pay much for it anyway. If I sell it myself, I'll be in trouble with
709my company, to whom I signed my life away when I was hired. If I give it
710away, I can pretend it was worthless in the first place, so my company
711won't care. In any event, it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission."
712
713So a freely distributable program is born.
714
715=head2 v5.14.0-RC3 - American Airlines Gate Agent, last call
716
717L<Announced on 2011-05-11 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172282.html>
718
719This is the last call for flight 1697 with service to Chicago and
720continuing service to San Francisco. All passengers should already be
721aboard. If you aren't aboard at this time, you will be denied boarding
722and your bags will be offloaded.
723
724=head2 v5.14.0-RC2 - Greg Grandin, Fordlandia, "the Rise and Fall of Henry Ford's Forgotten Jungle City"
725
726L<Announced on 2011-05-04 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg171879.html>
727
728Over the course of nearly two decades, Ford would spend tens of millions
729of dollars founding not one but, after the plantation was defastated
730by leaf blight, two American towns, complete with central squares,
731sidewalks, indoor plumbing, hospitals, manicured lawns, movie theaters,
732swimming pools, golf courses, and, of course, Model Ts and As rolling
733down their paved streets.
734
735Back in America, newspapers kept up their drumbeat celebration, only
736obliquely referencing reports that things were not progressing as the
737company had hoped. But there was one note of skepticism. In late 1928,
738the Washington Post ran an editorial that read in its entirety: "Ford will
739govern a rubber plantation in Brazil larger than North Carolina. This is
740the first time he has applied quantity production methods to trouble"
741
742=head2 v5.14.0-RC1 - Bill Bryson, "In a Sunburned Country"
743
744L<Announced on 2011-04-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/04/msg171253.html>
745
746But then Australia is such a difficult country to keep track of. On
747my first visit, some years ago, I passed the time on the long flight
748reading a history of Australian politics in the twentieth century,
749wherein I encountered the startling fact that in 1967 the prime minister,
750Harold Holt, was strolling along a beach in Victoria when he plunged into
751the surf and vanished. No trace of the poor man was ever seen again.
752This seemed doubly astounding to meE<0x2014>first that Australia could
753just I<lose> a prime minister (I mean, come on) and second that news of
754this had never reached me.
755
04496198
FR
756=head2 v5.13.11 - Walt Whitman, L<Leaves of Grass|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leaves_of_Grass>
757
758L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-03/msg00560.html>
759
760 When the full-grown poet came,
761 Out spake pleased Nature (the round impassive globe, with all its
762 shows of day and night,) saying, He is mine;
763 But out spake too the Soul of man, proud, jealous and unreconciled,
764 Nay he is mine alone;
765 --Then the full-grown poet stood between the two, and took each
766 by the hand;
767 And to-day and ever so stands, as blender, uniter, tightly holding hands,
768 Which he will never release until he reconciles the two,
769 And wholly and joyously blends them.
770
c7bed260 771=head2 v5.13.10 - Egill Skalla-Grímsson, L<Egils saga Skalla-Grímssonar|http://www.heimskringla.no/wiki/Egils_saga_Skalla-Gr%C3%ADmssonar>
f1e17f6f 772
fbc70a9e 773L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Ævar Arnfjörð Bjarmason|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/02/msg169340.html>
30688243 774
806849f8
FR
775 Skalat maðr rúnar rísta,
776 nema ráða vel kunni.
777 Þat verðr mörgum manni,
778 es of myrkvan staf villisk.
779 Sák á telgðu talkni
780 tíu launstafi ristna.
781 Þat hefr lauka lindi
f1e17f6f 782 langs ofrtrega fengit.
30688243 783
79af17bd
AB
784=head2 v5.13.9 - John F Kennedy, L<Inaugural Address January 20, 1961|http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/John_F._Kennedy%27s_Inaugural_Address>
785
786L<Announced on 2011-01-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168335.html>
787
788In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been
789granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I
790do not shrink from this responsibility -- I welcome it. I do not believe
791that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other
792generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this
793endeavor will light our country and all who serve it. And the glow from
794that fire can truly light the world.
795
796And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you;
797ask what you can do for your country.
798
799My fellow citizens of the world, ask not what America will do for you,
800but what together we can do for the freedom of man.
801
802Finally, whether you are citizens of America or citizens of the world,
803ask of us here the same high standards of strength and sacrifice which
804we ask of you. With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history
805the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth to lead the land we love,
806asking His blessing and His help, but knowing that here on earth God's
807work must truly be our own.
808
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809=head2 v5.13.8 - Roger Williams, L<"The Fifth Gift"|http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/8/19/21304/8493>
810
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811L<Announced on 2010-12-19 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/12/msg167271.html>
812
94521723
Z
813The aliens called the box a "matter generator," but we'd be more inclined
814to call it a matter duplicator. By connecting switches and potentiometers
815between the copper posts it was possible to make the box mark off two
816cubic rectangular areas of volume. Make a certain contact, and these
817areas would be isolated within perfectly reflective fields. They could
818be expanded or contracted by altering resistances between other posts.
819As I worked out the user interface I built a little control panel for
820the device. It was actually a clever way for the aliens to do things;
821instead of trying to build controls we could use, they built us an
822interface we could attach to controls that made sense to us. It could
823also be automated.
824
825Once you had made the contact that established the shielded volumes,
826if you made another certain contact the contents of the first volume
827were copied to the second. The machine copied metal, plastic, steel,
828and diamond with equal ease. Copies of copies of copies of copies were
829indistinguishable from the originals at any magnification, even using
830techniques like X-ray crystallography.
831
6b1649d0
CBW
832=head2 v5.13.7 - Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski, 'The Matrix'
833
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834L<Announced on 2010-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/11/msg166162.html>
835
6b1649d0
CBW
836[Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one]
837
5814c912 838 Neo: Whoa. Deja vu.
6b1649d0
CBW
839
840[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
841
5814c912
RS
842 Trinity: What did you just say?
843 Neo: Nothing. Just had a little deja vu.
844 Trinity: What did you see?
845 Cypher: What happened?
89550e55
RS
846 Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just
847 like it.
5814c912
RS
848 Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat?
849 Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure.
850 Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
851 Neo: What is it?
89550e55
RS
852 Trinity: A deja vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when
853 they change something.
6b1649d0 854
54cc2c9a
TM
855=head2 v5.13.6 - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore"
856
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ZA
857L<Announced on 2010-10-20 by Tatsuhiko Miyagawa|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/10/msg165183.html>
858
54cc2c9a
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859The boy called Crow softly rests a hand on my shoulder, and with that
860he storm vanishes.
861
862"From now on -- no matter what -- you've got to be the world's toughest
863fifteen-year-old. That's the only way you're going to survive. And in order
864to do that, you've got to figure out what it means to be tough. You following
865me?"
866
867I keep my eyes closed and don't reply. I just want to sink off into sleep
868like this, his hand on my shoulder. I hear the faint flutter of wings.
869
870"You're going to be the world's toughest fifteen-year-old," Crow whispers
871as I try to fall asleep. Like he was carving the words in a deep blue tattoo
872on my heart.
873
874(Translated from Japanese by Philip Gabriel)
875
f6c56125
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876=head2 v5.13.5 - Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, "The Room in the Dragon Volant"
877
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878L<Announced on 2010-09-19 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg164238.html>
879
f6c56125
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880Candle in hand I stepped in. I do not know whether the quality of
881air, long undisturbed, is peculiar; to me it has always seemed so, and
882the damp smell of the old masonry hung in this atmosphere. My candle
883faintly lighted the bare stone wall that enclosed the stair, the foot
884of which I could not see. Down I went, and a few turns brought me to
885the stone floor. Here was another door, of the simple, old, oak kind,
886deep sunk in the thickness of the wall. The large end of the key
887fitted this. The lock was stiff; I set the candle down upon the
888stair, and applied both hands; it turned with difficulty, and as it
889revolved, uttered a shriek that alarmed me for my secret.
890
891For some minutes I did not move. In a little time, however, I took
892courage, and opened the door. The night-air floating in puffed out
893the candle. There was a thicket of holly and underwood, as dense as a
894jungle, close about the door. I should have been in pitch-darkness,
895were it not that through the topmost leaves there twinkled, here and
896there, a glimmer of moonshine.
897
898Softly, lest any one should have opened his window at the sound of the
899rusty bolt, I struggled through this till I gained a view of the open
900grounds. Here I found that the brushwood spread a good way up the
901park, uniting with the wood that approached the little temple I have
806849f8 902described.
f6c56125 903
fdea69f9
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904=head2 v5.13.4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
905
2831a86c
ZA
906L<Announced on 2010-08-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163150.html>
907
fdea69f9
FR
908`How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought Alice;
909`I might as well be at school at once.' However, she got up, and began to repeat
910it, but her head was so full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what
911she was saying, and the words came very queer indeed:--
912
913 "'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare,
914 "You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair."
915 As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose
916 Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.'
917
918
919`That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' said the Gryphon.
920
921`Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it sounds uncommon
922nonsense.'
923
924Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if
925anything would ever happen in a natural way again.
926
927`I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle.
928
929`She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with the next verse.'
930
931`But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How could he turn them out
932with his nose, you know?'
933
934`It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was dreadfully puzzled by
935the whole thing, and longed to change the subject.
936
0feeb912
DG
937=head2 v5.13.3 - Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, "Good Omens"
938
2831a86c
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939L<Announced on 2010-07-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/07/msg162230.html>
940
0feeb912
DG
941Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading towards
942Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would
943notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth,
944for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his
945sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint.
946
947Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was
948dammned if he wasn't going to finish it in the Bentley as well.
949Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of
950motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage
951Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn't have been able to tell
952that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it
953had ever even been a car.
954
955There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have
956been black, where it wasn't a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but
957this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of
958flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult
959re-entry.
960
961There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the
962metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still
963somhow riding an inch above the road surface this didn't seem to
964make an awful lot of difference to the suspension.
965
966It should have fallen apart miles back.
967
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968=head2 v5.13.2 - Iain M Banks, "Use of Weapons"
969
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970L<Announced on 2010-06-22 by Matt S Trout|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/06/msg161112.html>
971
51caa79e
DG
972We deal in the moral equivalent of black holes, where the normal laws -
973the rules of right and wrong that people imagine apply everywhere else
974in the universe - break down; beyond those metaphysical event-horizons,
3c55f444
MT
975there exist ... special circumstances.
976
977=head2 v5.13.1 - Miguel de Unamuno, "The Sepulchre of Don Quixote"
d069c093 978
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979L<Announced on 2010-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160275.html>
980
d069c093
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981And if anyone shall come to you and say that he knows how to construct
982bridges and that perhaps a time will come when you will wish to avail
983yourself of his science in order to cross over a river, out with him! Out
984with the engineer! Rivers will be crossed by wading or swimming them, even
985if half the crusaders drown themselves. Let the engineer go off and build
986bridges somewhere else, where they are badly wanted. For those who go in
987quest of the sepulchre, faith is bridge enough.
988
c7bed260
Z
989=head2 v5.13.0 - Jules Verne, "A Journey to the Centre of the Earth"
990
991L<Announced on 2010-04-20 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg159275.html>
992
993The heat still remained at quite a supportable degree. With an
994involuntary shudder, I reflected on what the heat must have been
995when the volcano of Sneffels was pouring its smoke, flames, and
996streams of boiling lava -- all of which must have come up by the
997road we were now following. I could imagine the torrents of hot
998seething stone darting on, bubbling up with accompaniments of
999smoke, steam, and sulphurous stench!
1000
1001"Only to think of the consequences," I mused, "if the old
1002volcano were once more to set to work."
1003
1004=head2 v5.12.3 - Howard W. Campbell, Jr., "Reflections on Not Participating in Current Events"
1005
1006L<Announced on 2011-01-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168368.html>
1007
1008 I saw a huge steam roller,
1009 It blotted out the sun.
1010 The people all lay down, lay down;
1011 They did not try to run.
1012 My love and I, we looked amazed
1013 Upon the gory mystery.
1014 'Lie down, lie down!' the people cried.
1015 'The great machine is history!'
1016 My love and I, we ran away,
1017 The engine did not find us.
1018 We ran up to a mountain top,
1019 Left history far behind us.
1020 Perhaps we should have stayed and died,
1021 But somehow we don't think so.
1022 We went to see where history'd been,
1023 And my, the dead did stink so.
1024
1025=head2 v5.12.2 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
1026
1027L<Announced on 2010-09-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg163852.html>
1028
1029CPUs. Cayce Pollard Units. That's what Damien calls the clothing
1030she wears. CPUs are either black, white, or gray, and ideally
1031seem to have come into this world without human intervention.
1032
1033What people take for relentless minimalism is a side effect
1034of too much exposure to the reactor-cores of fashion. This
1035has resulted in a remorseless paring-down of what she can and
1036will wear. She is, literally, allergic to fashion. She can
1037only tolerate things that could have been worn, to a general
1038lack of comment, during any year between 1945 and 2000. She's a
1039design-free zone, a one-woman school of and whose very austerity
1040periodically threatens to spawn its own cult.
1041
1042=head2 v5.12.2-RC1 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
1043
1044L<Announced on 2010-08-31 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163670.html>
1045
1046The front page opens, familiar as a friend's living room. A frame-grab
1047from #48 serves as backdrop, dim and almost monochrome, no characters in
1048view. This is one of the sequences that generate comparisons with
1049Tarkovsky. She only knows Tarkovsky from stills, really, though she did
1050once fall asleep during a screening of The Stalker, going under on an
1051endless pan, the camera aimed straight down, in close-up, at a puddle on
1052a ruined mosaic floor. But she is not one of those who think that much
1053will be gained by analysis of the maker's imagined influences. The cult
1054of the footage is rife with subcults, claiming every possible influence.
1055Truffaut, Peckinpah -- The Peckinpah people, among the least likely, are
1056still waiting for the guns to be drawn.
1057
4363636d
DG
1058=head2 v5.12.1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
1059
2831a86c
ZA
1060L<Announced on 2010-05-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160109.html>
1061
4363636d
DG
1062"Now suppose," chortled Dr. Breed, enjoying himself, "that there were
1063many possible ways in which water could crystallize, could freeze.
d517a16a
Z
1064Suppose that the sort of ice we skate upon and put into highballs --
1065what we might call ice-one -- is only one of several types of ice.
4363636d
DG
1066Suppose water always froze as ice-one on Earth because it had never
1067had a seed to teach it how to form ice-two, ice-three, ice-four
1068...? And suppose," he rapped on his desk with his old hand again,
d517a16a
Z
1069"that there were one form, which we will call ice-nine -- a crystal as
1070hard as this desk -- with a melting point of, let us say, one-hundred
4363636d
DG
1071degrees Fahrenheit, or, better still, a melting point of one-hundred-
1072and-thirty degrees."
1073
4363636d
DG
1074=head2 v5.12.1-RC2 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
1075
2831a86c
ZA
1076L<Announced on 2010-05-13 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160066.html>
1077
4363636d
DG
1078San Lorenzo was fifty miles long and twenty miles wide, I learned from
1079the supplement to the New York Sunday Times. Its population was four
1080hundred, fifty thousand souls, "...all fiercely dedicated to the ideals
1081of the Free World."
1082
1083Its highest point, Mount McCabe, was eleven thousand feet above sea
1084level. Its capital was Bolivar, "...a strikingly modern city built on a
1085harbor capable of sheltering the entire United States Navy." The principal
1086exports were sugar, coffee, bananas, indigo, and handcrafted novelties.
1087
2831a86c
ZA
1088=head2 v5.12.1-RC1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
1089
1090L<Announced on 2010-05-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg159971.html>
4363636d 1091
4363636d
DG
1092Which brings me to the Bokononist concept of a wampeter. A wampeter is
1093the pivot of a karass. No karass is without a wampeter, Bokonon tells us,
1094just as no wheel is without a hub. Anything can be a wampeter: a tree,
1095a rock, an animal, an idea, a book, a melody, the Holy Grail. Whatever
1096it is, the members of its karass revolve about it in the majestic chaos
1097of a spiral nebula. The orbits of the members of a karass about their
1098common wampeter are spiritual orbits, naturally. It is souls and not
1099bodies that revolve. As Bokonon invites us to sing:
1100
1101 Around and around and around we spin,
1102 With feet of lead and wings of tin . . .
1103
4363636d
DG
1104=head2 v5.12.0 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1105
2831a86c
ZA
1106L<Announced on 2010-04-12 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158820.html>
1107
4363636d
DG
1108'Please would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, for she was
1109not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, 'why
1110your cat grins like that?'
1111
1112'It's a Cheshire cat,' said the Duchess, 'and that's why. Pig!'
1113
1114She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite
1115jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby,
1116and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:--
1117
1118'I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know
1119that cats COULD grin.'
1120
1121'They all can,' said the Duchess; 'and most of 'em do.'
1122
4363636d
DG
1123=head2 v5.12.0-RC5 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1124
2831a86c
ZA
1125L<Announced on 2010-04-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158720.html>
1126
4363636d
DG
1127'Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly; 'some of the words
1128have got altered.'
1129
1130'It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar decidedly, and
1131there was silence for some minutes.
1132
4363636d
DG
1133=head2 v5.12.0-RC4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1134
2831a86c
ZA
1135L<Announced on 2010-04-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158567.html>
1136
4363636d
DG
1137'It was much pleasanter at home,' thought poor Alice, 'when one wasn't
1138always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and
1139rabbits. I almost wish I hadn't gone down that rabbit-hole--and yet--and
1140yet--it's rather curious, you know, this sort of life! I do wonder what
1141can have happened to me! When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that
1142kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one!
1143
4363636d
DG
1144=head2 v5.12.0-RC3 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1145
2831a86c
ZA
1146L<Announced on 2010-04-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158346.html>
1147
4363636d
DG
1148At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them,
1149called out, 'Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL soon make you
1150dry enough!' They all sat down at once, in a large ring, with the Mouse
1151in the middle. Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt
1152sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon.
1153
1154'Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, 'are you all ready? This
1155is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! "William
1156the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was soon submitted
1157to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of late much
1158accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of
d517a16a 1159Mercia and Northumbria --"'
4363636d 1160
2831a86c 1161=head2 v5.12.0-RC2 - no announcement
4363636d 1162
2831a86c 1163Available on CPAN since 2010-04-01.
4363636d 1164
3e340399 1165=head2 v5.12.0-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
4363636d 1166
2831a86c
ZA
1167L<Announced on 2010-03-29 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg158060.html>
1168
4363636d
DG
1169So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the
1170hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of
1171making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and
1172picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran
1173close by her.
1174
1175There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice think it so
1176VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, 'Oh dear! Oh
1177dear! I shall be late!' (when she thought it over afterwards, it
1178occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this, but at the time
1179it all seemed quite natural); but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH
1180OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on,
1181Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had
1182never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to
1183take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the field
1184after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large
1185rabbit-hole under the hedge.
1186
1187In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how
1188in the world she was to get out again.
1189
0e6b8110 1190=head2 v5.12.0-RC0 - no epigraph
4363636d 1191
2831a86c 1192L<Announced on 2020-03-21 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg157761.html>
4363636d 1193
3e340399 1194=head2 v5.11.5 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "Christabel"
4363636d 1195
2831a86c
ZA
1196L<Announced on 2010-02-21 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/02/msg156957.html>
1197
4363636d
DG
1198 A little child, a limber elf,
1199 Singing, dancing to itself,
1200 A fairy thing with red round cheeks,
1201 That always finds, and never seeks,
1202 Makes such a vision to the sight
1203 As fills a father's eyes with light;
1204 And pleasures flow in so thick and fast
1205 Upon his heart, that he at last
1206 Must needs express his love's excess
1207 With words of unmeant bitterness.
1208 Perhaps 'tis pretty to force together
1209 Thoughts so all unlike each other;
1210 To mutter and mock a broken charm,
1211 To dally with wrong that does no harm.
1212 Perhaps 'tis tender too and pretty
1213 At each wild word to feel within
1214 A sweet recoil of love and pity.
1215 And what, if in a world of sin
1216 (O sorrow and shame should this be true!)
1217 Such giddiness of heart and brain
1218 Comes seldom save from rage and pain,
1219 So talks as it's most used to do.
1220
4363636d
DG
1221=head2 v5.11.4 - Fyodor Dostoevsky, "Crime and Punishment"
1222
2831a86c
ZA
1223L<Announced on 2010-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/01/msg155848.html>
1224
4363636d
DG
1225And you don't suppose that I went into it headlong like a fool? I went
1226into it like a wise man, and that was just my destruction. And you
1227mustn't suppose that I didn't know, for instance, that if I began to
1228question myself whether I had the right to gain power -- I certainly
1229hadn't the right -- or that if I asked myself whether a human being is a
1230louse it proved that it wasn't so for me, though it might be for a man
1231who would go straight to his goal without asking questions.... If I
1232worried myself all those days, wondering whether Napoleon would have
1233done it or not, I felt clearly of course that I wasn't Napoleon.
1234
4363636d
DG
1235=head2 v5.11.3 - Mark Twain, "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer"
1236
2831a86c
ZA
1237L<Announced on 2009-12-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/12/msg154838.html>
1238
4363636d 1239"Say -- I'm going in a swimming, I am. Don't you wish you could? But of
d517a16a 1240course you'd druther work -- wouldn't you? Course you would!"
4363636d
DG
1241
1242Tom contemplated the boy a bit, and said: "What do you call work?"
1243
1244"Why ain't that work?"
1245
1246Tom resumed his whitewashing, and answered carelessly: "Well, maybe it
1247is, and maybe it aint. All I know, is, it suits Tom Sawyer."
1248
1249"Oh come, now, you don't mean to let on that you like it?"
1250
1251The brush continued to move. "Like it? Well I don't see why I oughtn't
1252to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?"
1253
1254That put the thing in a new light. Ben stopped nibbling his apple. Tom
1255swept his brush daintily back and forth -- stepped back to note the effect
1256-- added a touch here and there-criticised the effect again -- Ben
1257watching every move and getting more and more interested, more and more
1258absorbed. Presently he said: "Say, Tom, let me whitewash a little."
1259
4363636d
DG
1260=head2 v5.11.2 - Michael Marshall Smith, "Only Forward"
1261
f0ccce9b 1262L<Announced on 2009-11-20 by Léon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/11/msg153646.html>
2831a86c 1263
4363636d
DG
1264The streets were pretty quiet, which was nice. They're always quiet here
1265at that time: you have to be wearing a black jacket to be out on the
1266streets between seven and nine in the evening, and not many people in
1267the area have black jackets. It's just one of those things. I currently
1268live in Colour Neighbourhood, which is for people who are heavily into
1269colour. All the streets and buildings are set for instant colourmatch:
1270as you walk down the road they change hue to offset whatever you're
1271wearing. When the streets are busy it's kind of intense, and anyone
1272prone to epileptic seizures isn't allowed to live in the Neighbourhood,
1273however much they're into colour.
1274
4363636d
DG
1275=head2 v5.11.1 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
1276
2831a86c
ZA
1277L<Announced on 2009-10-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg152360.html>
1278
4363636d
DG
1279Milo had been caught red-handed in the act of plundering his countrymen,
1280and, as a result, his stock had never been higher. He proved good as his
1281word when a rawboned major from Minnesota curled his lip in rebellious
1282disavowal and demanded his share of the syndicate Milo kept saying
1283everybody owned. Milo met the challenge by writing the words "A Share"
1284on the nearest scrap of paper and handing it away with a virtuous disdain
1285that won the envy and admiration of almost everyone who knew him. His
1286glory was at a peak, and Colonel Cathcart, who knew and admired his
1287war record, was astonished by the deferential humility with which Mil
1288presented himself at Group Headquarters and made his fantastic appeal
1289for more hazardous assignment.
1290
4363636d
DG
1291=head2 v5.11.0 - Mikhail Bulgakov, "The Master and Margarita"
1292
2831a86c
ZA
1293L<Announced on 2009-10-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg151376.html>
1294
4363636d
DG
1295Whispers of an "evil power" were heard in lines at dairy shops, in
1296streetcars, stores, arguments, kitchens, suburban and long-distance
1297trains, at stations large and small, in dachas and on beaches. Needless
1298to say, truly mature and cultured people did not tell these stories
1299about an evil power's visit to the capital. In fact, they even made fun
1300of them and tried to talk sense into those who told them. Nevertheless,
1301facts are facts, as they say, and cannot simply be dismissed without
1302explanation: somebody had visited the capital. The charred cinders of
1303Griboyedov alone, and many other things besides, confirmed it. Cultured
1304people shared the point of view of the investigating team: it was the
1305work of a gang of hypnotists and ventriloquists magnificently skilled in
1306their art.
1307
4363636d
DG
1308=head2 v5.10.1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1309
2831a86c
ZA
1310L<Announced on 2009-09-23 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150172.html>
1311
4363636d
DG
1312'Briefly, sir, I am the Permanent Under-Secretary of State, known as
1313the Permanent Secretary. Woolley here is your Principal Private
1314Secretary. I, too, have a Principal Private Secretary, and he is the
1315Principal Private Secretary to the Permanent Secretary. Directly
1316responsible to me are ten Deputy Secretaries, eighty-seven Under
1317Secretaries and two hundred and nineteen Assistant Secretaries.
1318Directly responsible to the Principal Private Secretaries are plain
1319Private Secretaries. The Prime Minister will be appointing two
1320Parliamentary Under-Secretaries and you will be appointing your own
1321Parliamentary Private Secretary.'
1322
1323'Can they all type?' I joked.
1324
1325'None of us can type, Minister,' replied Sir Humphrey smoothly. 'Mrs
1326McKay types - she is your Secretary.'
1327
1328I couldn't tell whether or not he was joking. 'What a pity,' I said.
1329'We could have opened an agency.'
1330
1331Sir Humphrey and Bernard laughed. 'Very droll, sir,' said Sir
1332Humphrey. 'Most amusing, sir,' said Bernard. Were they genuinely
1333amused at my wit, or just being rather patronising? 'I suppose they
1334all say that, do they?' I ventured.
1335
1336Sir Humphrey reassured me on that. 'Certainly not, Minister,' he
1337replied. 'Not quite all.'
1338
0e6b8110 1339=head2 v5.10.1-RC2 - no epigraph
4363636d 1340
2831a86c 1341L<Announced on 2009-08-18 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150015.html>
3e340399 1342
0e6b8110 1343=head2 v5.10.1-RC1 - no epigraph
4363636d 1344
2831a86c 1345L<Announced on 2009-08-06 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg149498.html>
3e340399 1346
c7bed260 1347=head2 v5.10.0 - Laurence Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
4363636d 1348
c7bed260
Z
1349L<Announced on 2007-12-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/12/msg131636.html>
1350
1351He would often declare, in speaking his thoughts upon the subject, that
1352he did not conceive how the greatest family in England could stand it
1353out against an uninterrupted succession of six or seven short
1354noses.--And for the contrary reason, he would generally add, That it
1355must be one of the greatest problems in civil life, where the same
1356number of long and jolly noses, following one another in a direct line,
1357did not raise and hoist it up into the best vacancies in the kingdom.
1358
1359=head2 v5.10.0-RC2 - no epigraph
1360
1361L<Announced on 2007-11-25 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130978.html>
1362
1363=head2 v5.10.0-RC1 - no epigraph
1364
1365L<Announced on 2007-11-17 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130653.html>
1366
1367=head2 v5.9.5 - no announcement
1368
1369L<Pre-announced on 2007-07-07 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/07/msg126358.html>,
1370available on CPAN with same date, but never actually announced.
1371
1372=head2 v5.9.4 - no epigraph
1373
1374L<Announced on 2006-08-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/08/msg115782.html>
1375
1376=head2 v5.9.3 - no epigraph
1377
1378L<Announced on 2006-01-28 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg109086.html>
1379
1380=head2 v5.9.2 - Thomas Pynchon, "V"
1381
1382L<Announced on 2005-04-01 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20050401150702.2b4a70d5@grubert.mandrakesoft.com>
1383
1384This word flip was weird. Every recording date of McClintic's he'd
1385gotten into the habit of talking electricity with the audio men and
1386technicians of the studio. McClintic once couldn't have cared less
1387about electricity, but now it seemed if that was helping him reach a
1388bigger audience, some digging, some who would never dig, but all
1389paying and those royalties keeping the Triumph in gas and McClintic
1390in J. Press suits, then McClintic ought to be grateful to
1391electricity, ought maybe to learn a little more about it. So he'd
1392picked up some here and there, and one day last summer he got around
1393to talking stochastic music and digital computers with one
1394technician. Out of the conversation had come Set/Reset, which was
1395getting to be a signature for the group. He had found out from this
1396sound man about a two-triode circuit called a flip-flop, which when
1397it turned on could be one of two ways, depending on which tube was
1398conducting and which was cut off: set or reset, flip or flop.
1399
1400"And that," the man said, "can be yes or no, or one or zero. And
1401that is what you might call one of the basic units, or specialized
1402`cells' in a big `electronic brain.' "
1403
1404"Crazy," said McClintic, having lost him back there someplace. But
1405one thing that did occur to him was if a computer's brain could go
1406flip or flop, why so could a musician's. As long as you were flop,
1407everything was cool. But where did the trigger-pulse come from to
1408make you flip?
1409
1410=head2 v5.9.1 - Tom Stoppard, "Arcadia"
1411
1412L<Announced on 2004-03-16 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/8587d77c565f2d43>
1413
1414Aren't you supposed to have a pony?
1415
1416=head2 v5.9.0 - Doris Lessing, "Martha Quest"
1417
1418L<Announced on 2003-10-27 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/63a8c34385de82a1>
1419
1420What of October, that ambiguous month
4363636d 1421
4363636d
DG
1422=head2 v5.8.9 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1423
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1424L<Announced on 2008-12-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/12/msg142571.html>
1425
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1426Frank and I, unlike the civil servants, were still puzzled that such a
1427proposal as the Europass could even be seriously under consideration by
1428the FCO. We can both see clearly that it is wonderful ammunition for the
1429anti-Europeans. I asked Humphrey if the Foreign Office doesn't realise
1430how damaging this would be to the European ideal?
1431
1432'I'm sure they do, Minister, he said. That's why they support it.'
1433
1434This was even more puzzling, since I'd always been under the impression
1435that the FO is pro-Europe. 'Is it or isn't it?' I asked Humphrey.
1436
1437'Yes and no,' he replied of course, 'if you'll pardon the
1438expression. The Foreign Office is pro-Europe because it is really
1439anti-Europe. In fact the Civil Service was united in its desire to make
1440sure the Common Market didn't work. That's why we went into it.'
1441
1442This sounded like a riddle to me. I asked him to explain further. And
1443basically his argument was as follows: Britain has had the same foreign
1444policy objective for at least the last five hundred years - to create a
1445disunited Europe. In that cause we have fought with the Dutch against
1446the Spanish, with the Germans against the French, with the French and
1447Italians against the Germans, and with the French against the Italians
1448and Germans. [The Dutch rebellion against Phillip II of Spain, the
1449Napoleonic Wars, the First World War, and the Second World War - Ed.]
1450
1451In other words, divide and rule. And the Foreign Office can see no
1452reason to change when it has worked so well until now.
1453
1454I was aware of this, naturally, but I regarded it as ancient history.
1455Humphrey thinks that it is, in fact, current policy. It was necessary
1456for us to break up the EEC, he explained, so we had to get inside. We
1457had previously tried to break it up from the outside, but that didn't
1458work. [A reference to our futile and short-lived involvement in EFTA,
1459the European Free Trade Association, founded in 1960 and which the UK
1460left in 1972 - Ed.] Now that we're in, we are able to make a complete
1461pig's breakfast out of it. We've now set the Germans against the French,
1462the French against the Italians, the Italians against the Dutch... and
1463the Foreign office is terribly happy. It's just like old time.
1464
1465I was staggered by all of this. I thought that the all of us who are
1466publicly pro-European believed in the European ideal. I said this to Sir
1467Humphrey, and he simply chuckled.
1468
1469So I asked him: if we don't believe in the European Ideal, why are we
1470pushing to increase the membership?
1471
1472'Same reason,' came the reply. 'It's just like the United Nations. The
1473more members it has, the more arguments you can stir up, and the more
1474futile and impotent it becomes.'
1475
1476This all strikes me as the most appalling cynicism, and I said so.
1477
1478Sir Humphrey agreed completely. 'Yes Minister. We call it
1479diplomacy. It's what made Britain great, you know.'
1480
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1481=head2 v5.8.9-RC2 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1482
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1483L<Announced on 2008-12-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg142422.html>
1484
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1485There was silence in the office. I didn't know what we were going to do
1486about the four hundred new people supervising our economy drive or the
1487four hundred new people for the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office, or
1488anything! I simply sat and waited and hoped that my head would stop
1489thumping and that some idea would be suggested by someone sometime soon.
1490
1491Sir Humphrey obliged. 'Minister... if we were to end the economy drive
1492and close the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office we could issue an immediate
1493press announcement that you had axed eight hundred jobs.' He had
1494obviously thought this out carefully in advance, for at this moment he
1495produced a slim folder from under his arm. 'If you'd like to approve
1496this draft...'
1497
1498I couldn't believe the impertinence of the suggestion. Axed eight
1499hundred jobs? 'But no one was ever doing these jobs,' I pointed out
1500incredulously. 'No one's been appointed yet.'
1501
1502'Even greater economy,' he replied instantly. 'We've saved eight hundred
1503redundancy payments as well.'
1504
1505'But...' I attempted to explain '... that's just phony. It's dishonest,
1506it's juggling with figures, it's pulling the wool over people's eyes.'
1507
1508'A government press release, in fact.' said Humphrey.
1509
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1510=head2 v5.8.9-RC1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1511
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1512L<Announced on 2008-11-10 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg141515.html>
1513
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1514A jumbo jet touched down, with BURANDAN AIRWAYS written on the side. I
1515was hugely impressed. British Airways are having to pawn their Concordes,
1516and here is this little tiny African state with its own airline, jumbo
1517jets and all.
1518
1519I asked Bernard how many planes Burandan Airways had. 'None,' he said.
1520
1521I told him not to be silly and use his eyes. 'No Minister, it belongs to
1522Freddie Laker,' he said. 'They chartered it last week and repainted it
1523specially.' Apparently most of the Have-Nots (I mean, LDCs) do this - at
1524the opening of the UN General Assembly the runways of Kennedy Airport are
1525jam-packed with phoney flag-carriers. 'In fact,' said Bernard with a sly
1526grin, 'there was one 747 that belonged to nine different African airlines
1527in a month. They called it the mumbo-jumbo.'
1528
1529While we watched nothing much happening on the TV except the mumbo-jumbo
1530taxiing around Prestwick and the Queen looking a bit chilly, Bernard gave
1531me the next day's schedule and explained that I was booked on the night
1532sleeper from King's Cross to Edinburgh because I had to vote in a
1533three-line whip at the House tonight and would have to miss the last
1534plane. Then the commentator, in that special hushed BBC voice used for any
1535occasion with which Royalty is connected, announced reverentially that we
1536were about to catch our first glimpse of President Selim.
1537
1538And out of the plane stepped Charlie. My old friend Charlie Umtali. We
1539were at LSE together. Not Selim Mohammed at all, but Charlie.
1540
1541Bernard asked me if I were sure. Silly question. How could you forget a
1542name like Charlie Umtali?
1543
1544I sent Bernard for Sir Humphrey, who was delighted to hear that we now
1545know something about our official visitor.
1546
1547Bernard's official brief said nothing. Amazing! Amazing how little the FCO
1548has been able to find out. Perhaps they were hoping it would all be on the
1549car radio. All the brief says is that Colonel Selim Mohammed had converted
1550to Islam some years ago, they didn't know his original name, and therefore
1551knew little of his background.
1552
1553I was able to tell Humphrey and Bernard /all/ about his background.
1554Charlie was a red-hot political economist, I informed them. Got the top
1555first. Wiped the floor with everyone.
1556
1557Bernard seemed relieved. 'Well that's all right then.'
1558
1559'Why?' I enquired.
1560
1561'I think Bernard means,' said Sir Humphrey helpfully, 'that he'll know how
1562to behave if he was at an English University. Even if it was the LSE.' I
1563never know whether or not Humphrey is insulting me intentionally.
1564
1565Humphrey was concerned about Charlie's political colour. 'When you said
1566that he was red-hot, were you speaking politically?'
1567
1568In a way I was. 'The thing about Charlie is that you never quite know
1569where you are with him. He's the sort of chap who follows you into a
1570revolving door and comes out in front.'
1571
1572'No deeply held convictions?' asked Sir Humphrey.
1573
1574'No. The only thing Charlie was committed too was Charlie.'
1575
1576'Ah, I see. A politician, Minister.'
1577
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1578=head2 v5.8.8 - Joe Raposo, "Bein' Green"
1579
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1580L<Announced on 2006-02-01 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/28caf52e41ebe723>
1581
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1582 It's not that easy bein' green
1583 Having to spend each day the color of the leaves
4363636d 1584 When I think it could be nicer being red or yellow or gold
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DG
1585 Or something much more colorful like that
1586
1587 It's not easy bein' green
4363636d 1588 It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things
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DG
1589 And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're
1590 Not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water
1591 Or stars in the sky
1592
1593 But green's the color of Spring
1594 And green can be cool and friendly-like
1595 And green can be big like an ocean
1596 Or important like a mountain
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1597 Or tall like a tree
1598
1599 When green is all there is to be
1600 It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why?
1601 Wonder I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful
1602 And I think it's what I want to be
1603
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1604=head2 v5.8.8-RC1 - Cosgrove Hall Productions, "Dangermouse"
1605
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1606L<Announced on 2006-01-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/d231fc554af8cc51>
1607
1608Greenback: And the world is mine, all mine. Muhahahahaha. See to it!
51caa79e 1609
2831a86c 1610Stiletto: Si, Barone. Subito, Barone.
4363636d 1611
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1612=head2 v5.8.7 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
1613
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1614L<Announced on 2005-05-31 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9a545704a0062f16>
1615
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1616And now, imagine the triumphant procession: Peter at the head; after him the
1617hunters leading the wolf; and winding up the procession, grandfather and the
1618cat.
1619
1620Grandfather shook his head discontentedly: "Well, and if Peter hadn't caught
51caa79e 1621the wolf? What then?"
4363636d 1622
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1623=head2 v5.8.7-RC1 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
1624
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1625L<Announced on 2005-05-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/05/msg100711.html>
1626
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1627And now this is how things stood: The cat was sitting on one branch. The
1628bird on another, not too close to the cat. And the wolf walked round and
1629round the tree, looking at them with greedy eyes.
1630
1631In the meantime, Peter, without the slightest fear, stood behind the
1632gate, watching all that was going on. He ran home,got a strong rope and
1633climbed up the high stone wall.
1634
1635One of the branches of the tree, around which the wolf was walking,
1636stretched out over the wall.
1637
1638Grabbing hold of the branch, Peter lightly climbed over on to the tree.
1639Peter said to the bird: "Fly down and circle round the wolf's head, only
1640take care that he doesn't catch you!".
1641
1642The bird almost touched the wolf's head with its wings, while the wolf
1643snapped angrily at him from this side and that.
1644
1645How that bird teased the wolf, how that wolf wanted to catch him! But
51caa79e 1646the bird was clever and the wolf simply couldn't do anything about it.
4363636d 1647
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1648=head2 v5.8.6 - A. A. Milne, "The House at Pooh Corner"
1649
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1650L<Announced on 2004-11-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20041128000836.GA304@Bagpuss.unfortu.net>
1651
4363636d 1652"Hallo, Pooh," said Piglet, giving a jump of surprise. "I knew it was
51caa79e 1653you."
4363636d 1654
51caa79e 1655"So did I,", said Pooh. "What are you doing?"
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DG
1656
1657"I'm planting a haycorn, Pooh, so that it can grow up into an oak-tree,
1658and have lots of haycorns just outside the front door instead of having
51caa79e 1659to walk miles and miles, do you see, Pooh?"
4363636d 1660
51caa79e 1661"Supposing it doesn't?" said Pooh.
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DG
1662
1663"It will, because Christopher Robin says it will, so that's why I'm
1664planting it."
1665
1666"Well," aid Pooh, "if I plant a honeycomb outside my house, then it will
51caa79e 1667grow up into a beehive."
4363636d 1668
51caa79e 1669Piglet wasn't quite sure about this.
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DG
1670
1671"Or a /piece/ of a honeycomb," said Pooh, "so as not to waste too much.
1672Only then I might only get a piece of a beehive, and it might be the
51caa79e 1673wrong piece, where the bees were buzzing and not hunnying. Bother"
4363636d 1674
51caa79e 1675Piglet agreed that that would be rather bothering.
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DG
1676
1677"Besides, Pooh, it's a very difficult thing, planting unless you know
1678how to do it," he said; and he put the acorn in the hole he had made,
51caa79e 1679and covered it up with earth, and jumped on it.
4363636d 1680
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1681=head2 v5.8.6-RC1 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie the Pooh"
1682
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1683L<Announced on 2004-11-11 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/11/msg95786.html>
1684
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1685"Hallo!" said Piglet, "whare are /you/ doing?"
1686
1687"Hunting," said Pooh.
1688
1689"Hunting what?"
1690
1691"Tracking something," said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously.
1692
1693"Tracking what?" said Piglet, coming closer.
1694
1695"That's just what I ask myself, I ask myself, What?"
1696
1697"What do you think you'll answer?"
1698
1699"I shall have to wait until I catch up with it," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
1700"Now, look there." He pointed to the ground in front of him. "What do
1701you see there?"
1702
1703"Track," said Piglet. "Paw-marks." He gave a little squeak of
1704excitement. "Oh, Pooh!" Do you think it's a--a--a Woozle?"
1705
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1706=head2 v5.8.5 - wikipedia, "Yew"
1707
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1708L<Announced on 2004-07-19 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/68340e2e4c39222c>
1709
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1710Yews are relatively slow growing trees, widely used in landscaping and
1711ornamental horticulture. They have flat, dark-green needles, reddish
1712bark, and bear seeds with red arils, which are eaten by thrushes,
1713waxwings and other birds, dispersing the hard seeds undamaged in their
1714droppings. Yew wood is reddish brown (with white sapwood), and very
1715hard. It was traditionally used to make bows, especially the English
1716longbow.
1717
1718In England, the Common Yew (Taxus baccata, also known as English Yew) is
1719often found in churchyards. It is sometimes suggested that these are
1720placed there as a symbol of long life or trees of death, and some are
1721likely to be over 3,000 years old. It is also suggested that yew trees
1722may have a pre-Christian association with old pagan holy sites, and the
1723Christian church found it expedient to use and take over existing sites.
1724Another explanation is that the poisonous berries and foliage discourage
1725farmers and drovers from letting their animals wander into the burial
1726grounds. The yew tree is a frequent symbol in the Christian poetry of
51caa79e 1727T.S. Eliot, especially his Four Quartets.
4363636d 1728
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1729=head2 v5.8.5-RC2 - wikipedia, "Beech"
1730
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1731L<Announced on 2004-07-09 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/f92175725af7a5ad>
1732
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1733Beeches are trees of the Genus Fagus, family Fagaceae, including about
1734ten species in Europe, Asia, and North America. The leaves are entire or
1735sparsely toothed. The fruit is a small, sharply-angled nut, borne in
1736pairs in spiny husks. The beech most commonly grown as an ornamental or
1737shade tree is the European beech (Fagus sylvatica).
1738
1739The southern beeches belong to a different but related genus,
1740Nothofagus. They are found in Australia, New Zealand, New Guinea, New
51caa79e 1741Caledonia and South America.
4363636d 1742
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1743=head2 v5.8.5-RC1 - wikipedia, "Pedunculate Oak" (abridged)
1744
38183302 1745L<Announced on 2004-07-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/ca6ce4a7ed9f219c?pli=1>
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1747The Pedunculate Oak is called the Common Oak in Britain, and is also
1748often called the English Oak in other English speaking countries It is a
1749large deciduous tree to 25-35m tall (exceptionally to 40m), with lobed
1750and sessile (stalk-less) leaves. Flowering takes place in early to mid
1751spring, and their fruit, called "acorns", ripen by autumn of the same
1752year. The acorns are pedunculate (having a peduncle or acorn-stalk) and
1753may occur singly, or several acorns may occur on a stalk.
1754
1755It forms a long-lived tree, with a large widespreading head of rugged
1756branches. While it may naturally live to an age of a few centuries, many
1757of the oldest trees are pollarded or coppiced, both pruning techniques
1758that extend the tree's potential lifespan, if not its health.
1759
1760Within its native range it is valued for its importance to insects and
1761other wildlife. Numerous insects live on the leaves, buds, and in the
1762acorns. The acorns form a valuable food resource for several small
1763mammals and some birds, notably Jays Garrulus glandarius.
1764
1765It is planted for forestry, and produces a long-lasting and durable
51caa79e 1766heartwood, much in demand for interior and furniture work.
4363636d 1767
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1768=head2 v5.8.4 - T. S. Eliot, "The Old Gumbie Cat"
1769
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1770L<Announced on 2004-04-22 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/c7333acf03ef4015>
1771
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1772 I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots;
1773 The curtain-cord she likes to wind, and tie it into sailor-knots.
1774 She sits upon the window-sill, or anything that's smooth and flat:
1775 She sits and sits and sits and sits -- and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat!
1776
1777 But when the day's hustle and bustle is done,
1778 Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun.
1779 She thinks that the cockroaches just need employment
1780 To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment.
1781 So she's formed, from that a lot of disorderly louts,
1782 A troop of well-disciplined helpful boy-scouts,
1783 With a purpose in life and a good deed to do--
1784 And she's even created a Beetles' Tattoo.
1785
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1786 So for Old Gumbie Cats let us now give three cheers --
1787 On whom well-ordered households depend, it appears.
1788
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1789
1790=head2 v5.8.4-RC2 - T. S. Eliot, "Macavity: The Mystery Cat"
1791
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1792L<Announced on 2004-04-16 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/84f6fdd73cc56a1b>
1793
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1794 Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw --
1795 For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
1796 He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
1797 For when they reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
1798
1799 Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
1800 He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
1801 His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
1802 And when you reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
1803 You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air --
1804 But I tell you once and once again, /Macavity's not there/!
1805
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1806=head2 v5.8.4-RC1 - T. S. Eliot, "Skimbleshanks: The Railway Cat"
1807
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1808L<Announced on 2004-04-05 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e500353440769ebf>
1809
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1810 There's a whisper down the line at 11.39
1811 When the Night Mail's ready to depart,
1812 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble has he gone to hunt the thimble?
1813 We must find him of the train can't start.'
1814 All the guards and all the porters and the stationmaster's daughters
1815 They are searching high and low,
1816 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble for unless he's very nimble
1817 Then the Night Mail just can't go'
1818 At 11.42 then the signal's overdue
1819 And the passengers are frantic to a man--
1820 Then Skimble will appear and he'll saunter to the rear:
1821 He's been busy in the luggage van!
1822 He gives one flash of his glass-green eyes
1823 And the the signal goes 'All Clear!'
1824 And we're off at last of the northern part
1825 Of the Northern Hemisphere!
1826
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1827=head2 v5.8.3 - Arthur William Edgar O'Shaugnessy, "Ode"
1828
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1829L<Announced on 2004-01-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/968fb8d71e23af69>
1830
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1831 We are the music makers,
1832 And we are the dreamers of dreams,
1833 Wandering by lonely sea-breakers,
1834 And sitting by desolate streams; --
1835 World-losers and world-forsakers,
1836 On whom the pale moon gleams:
1837 Yet we are the movers and shakers
1838 Of the world for ever, it seems.
4363636d 1839
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1840=head2 v5.8.3-RC1 - Irving Berlin, "Let's Face the Music and Dance"
1841
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1842L<Announced on 2004-01-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/5ced50bebcd11c96>
1843
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1844 There may be trouble ahead,
1845 But while there's music and moonlight,
1846 And love and romance,
1847 Let's face the music and dance.
1848
1849 Before the fiddlers have fled,
1850 Before they ask us to pay the bill,
1851 And while we still have that chance,
1852 Let's face the music and dance.
1853
1854 Soon, we'll be without the moon,
1855 Humming a different tune, and then,
1856
1857 There may be teardrops to shed,
1858 So while there's music and moonlight,
1859 And love and romance,
1860 Let's face the music and dance.
1861
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1862=head2 v5.8.2 - Walt Whitman, "Passage to India"
1863
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1864L<Announced on 2003-11-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/4714574f93967673>
1865
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1866 Passage, immediate passage! the blood burns in my veins!
1867 Away O soul! hoist instantly the anchor!
1868 Cut the hawsers - hall out - shake out every sail!
1869 Have we not stood here like trees in the ground long enough?
1870 Have we not grovel'd here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes?
1871 Have we not darken'd and dazed ourselves with books long enough?
1872
4363636d
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1873 Sail forth - steer for the deep waters only,
1874 Reckless O soul, exploring, I with the and thou with me,
1875 For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go,
1876 And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all.
1877
1878 O my brave soul!
1879 O farther farther sail!
1880 O daring job, but safe! are they not all the seas of God?
1881 O farther, farther, farther sail!
1882
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1883=head2 v5.8.2-RC2 - Eric Idle/John Du Prez, "Accountancy Shanty"
1884
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1885L<Announced on 2003-11-03 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/7669de5804b792f6>
1886
4363636d
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1887 It's fun to charter an accountant
1888 And sail the wide accountan-cy,
1889 To find, explore the funds offshore
1890 And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy.
1891
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1892=head2 v5.8.2-RC1 - Edward Lear, "The Jumblies"
1893
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1894L<Announced on 2003-10-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83680ef3bbf7378d>
1895
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1896 They went to sea in a Sieve, they did,
1897 In a Sieve they went to sea:
1898 In spite of all their friends could say,
1899 On a winter's morn, on a stormy day,
1900 In a Sieve they went to sea!
1901 And when the Sieve turned round and round,
1902 And everyone cried, "You'll all be drowned!"
1903 They cried aloud, "Our Sieve ain't big,
1904 But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig!
1905 In a Sieve we'll go to sea!"
1906
1907 Far and few, far and few,
1908 Are the lands where the Jumblies live;
1909 Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
1910 And they went to sea in a Sieve.
1911
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ZA
1912=head2 v5.8.1 - epigraph same as v5.7.1
1913
1914L<Announced on 2003-09-25 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82678.html>
1915
1916=head2 v5.8.1-RC5 - Terry Pratchett, "Lords and Ladies"
1917
1918L<Announced on 2003-09-22 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82476.html>
1919
1920No matter what she did with her hair it took about
1921three minutes for it to tangle itself up again,
1922like a garden hosepipe in a shed [Footnote: Which,
1923no matter how carefully coiled, will always uncoil
1924overnight and tie the lawnmower to the bicycles].
1925
1926=head2 v5.8.1-RC4 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1927
1928L<Announced on 2003-08-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/08/msg79184.html>
1929
1930Grand Viziers were /always/ scheming megalomaniacs.
1931It was probably in the job description: "Are you a
1932devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good,
1933then you can be my most trusted minister."
1934
1935=head2 v5.8.1-RC3 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1936
1937L<Announced on 2003-07-30 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg79048.html>
1938
1939Lord Hong had a mind like a knife, although possibly
1940a knife with a curved blade.
1941
1942=head2 v5.8.1-RC2 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1943
1944L<Announced on 2003-07-11 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78102.html>
1945
1946Many an ancient lord's last words had been, "You can't kill
1947me because I've got magic aaargh."
1948
1949=head2 v5.8.1-RC1 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1950
1951L<Announced on 2003-07-10 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78009.html>
1952
1953Cohen was familiar with city gates. He'd broken down a number
1954in his time, by battering ram, siege gun, and on one occasion
1955with his head.
1956
1957But the gates of Hunghung were pretty damn good gates. They
1958weren't like the gates of Ankh-Morpork, which were usually wide
1959open to attract the spending customer and whose concession to
1960defense was the sign "Thank You For Not Attacking Our City.
1961Bonum Diem." These things were big and made of metal and there
1962was a guardhouse and a squad of unhelpful men in black armor.
1963
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ZA
1964=head2 v5.8.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
1965
1966L<Announced on 2002-07-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63720.html>
1967
1968There was the faint sound of footsteps.
1969"Chap with a whip got as far as the big sharp spikes last week,"
1970said the low priest.
1971There was a sound like the flushing of a very old dry lavatory.
1972The footsteps stopped. The High Priest smiled to himself.
1973"Right," he said. "See your two pebbles and raise you two pebbles."
1974The low priest threw down his cards. "Double Onion," he said.
1975The High Priest looked down suspiciously.
1976The low priest consulted a scrap of paper. "That's three hundred
1977thousand, nine hundred and sixty-four pebbles you owe me," he said.
1978There was the sound of footsteps. The priests exchanged glances.
1979"Haven't had one for poisoned-dart alley for quite some time,"
1980said the High Priest.
1981"Five says he makes it", said the low priest. "You're on."
1982There was a faint clatter of metal points on stone.
1983"It's a shame to take your pebbles."
1984There were footsteps again.
1985
1986=head2 v5.8.0-RC3 - no epigraph
1987
1988L<Announced on 2002-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63234.html>
1989
1990=head2 v5.8.0-RC2 - no epigraph
1991
1992L<Announced on 2002-06-21 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg62013.html>
1993
1994=head2 v5.8.0-RC1 - no epigraph
1995
1996L<Announced on 2002-06-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg60317.html>
1997
1998=head2 v5.7.3 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
1999
2000L<Announced on 2002-03-04 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/03/msg53652.html>
2001
2002Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong.
2003No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always
2004got there first, and is waiting for it.
2005
2006=head2 v5.7.2 - Terry Pratchett, "Small Gods"
2007
2008L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/07/msg40370.html>
2009
2010His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools --
2011the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans -- and summed up
2012all three of them in his famous phrase, "You can't trust any
2013bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing
2014you can do about it, so let's have a drink."
2015
2016=head2 v5.7.1 - Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic"
2017
2018L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33851.html>
4363636d 2019
4363636d
DG
2020"What happens next?" asked Twoflower.
2021
2022Hrun screwed a finger in his ear and inspected it absently.
2023
2024"Oh,", he said, "I expect in a minute the door will be
2025flung back and I'll be dragged off to some sort of temple
2026arena where I'll fight maybe a couple of giant spiders
2027and an eight-foot slave from the jungles of Klatch and then
2028I'll rescue some kind of a princess from the altar and then
2029I'll kill off a few guards or whatever and then this girl
2030will show me the secret passage out of the place and we'll
2031liberate a couple of horses and escape with the treasure."
2032Hrun leaned his head back on his hands and looked at the
2033ceiling, whistling tunelessly.
2034
2035"All that?" said Twoflower.
2036
2037"Usually."
2038
c7bed260
Z
2039=head2 v5.7.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Moving Pictures"
2040
2041L<Announced on 2000-09-02 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/09/msg17730.html>
2042
2043The Librarian had seen many weird things in his time,
2044but that had to be the 57th strangest.
2045[footnote: he had a tidy mind]
2046
2047=head2 v5.6.2 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
2048
2049L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/deb8cb9ad918716f>
2050
2051When great or unexpected events fall out upon the stage of this
2052sublunary word--the mind of man, which is an inquisitive kind of
2053a substance, naturally takes a flight, behind the scenes, to see
2054what is the cause and first spring of them--The search was not
2055long in this instance.
2056
2057=head2 v5.6.2-RC1 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
2058
2059L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e3d4acc7a8dd3ce5>
2060
2061"Pray, my dear", quoth my mother, "have you not forgot to wind up the clock?"
2062
2831a86c 2063=head2 v5.6.1 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", Riddles in the Dark
4363636d 2064
2831a86c 2065L<Announced on 2001-04-08 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33823.html>
4363636d 2066
2831a86c
ZA
2067`What have I got in my pocket?' he said aloud. He was talking to
2068himself, but Gollum thought it was a riddle, and he was frightfully
2069upset.
4363636d 2070
2831a86c
ZA
2071`Not fair! not fair!' he hissed. `It isn't fair, my precious, is it,
2072to ask us what it's got in its nassty little pocketses?'
4363636d 2073
2831a86c
ZA
2074Bilbo seeing what had happened and having nothing better to ask
2075stuck to his question, `What have I got in my pocket?' he said
2076louder.
4363636d 2077
2831a86c
ZA
2078`S-s-s-s-s,' hissed Gollum. `It must give us three guesseses,
2079my precious, three guesseses.'
4363636d 2080
2831a86c 2081=head2 v5.6.1-foolish - no epigraph
4363636d 2082
2831a86c 2083L<Announced on 2001-08-04 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33421.html>
3e340399 2084
2831a86c 2085=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL3 - I can't find the announcement
4363636d 2086
a4b0381d
MS
2087No announcement available.
2088
2831a86c 2089=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL2 - no epigraph
4363636d 2090
2831a86c 2091L<Announced on 2001-01-31 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/01/msg29934.html>
4363636d 2092
2831a86c 2093=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL1 - no epigraph
4363636d 2094
2831a86c 2095L<Announced on 2000-12-18 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/12/msg27738.html>
4363636d 2096
2831a86c 2097=head2 v5.6.0 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", The Last Stage
a4b0381d 2098
2831a86c
ZA
2099L<Announced on 2000-03-23 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10341.html>
2100
2101 The dragon is withered,
2102 His bones are now crumbled;
2103 His armour is shivered,
2104 His splendour is humbled!
2105 Though sword shall be rusted,
2106 And throne and crown perish
2107 With strength that men trusted
2108 And wealth that they cherish,
2109 Here grass is still growing,
2110 And leaves are a yet swinging,
2111 The white water flowing,
2112 And elves are yet singing
2113 Come! Tra-la-la-lally!
2114 Come back to the valley.
2115
2831a86c
ZA
2116=head2 v5.6.0-RC3 - no epigraph
2117
2118L<Announced on 2000-03-22 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10140.html>
4363636d 2119
c7bed260
Z
2120=head2 v5.005_05-RC1 - no epigraph
2121
2122L<Announced on 2009-02-16 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/02/msg144227.html>
2123
2124=head2 v5.005_04 - no epigraph
2125
2126L<Announced on 2004-03-01 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6c240ad0b189cb47>
2127
2128=head2 v5.005_04-RC2 - Rudyard Kipling, "The Jungle Book"
2129
2130L<Announced on 2004-02-19 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83e5421124a7b49d>
2131
2132The monkeys called the place their city, and pretended to despise
2133the Jungle-People because they lived in the forest. And yet they
2134never knew what the buildings were made for nor how to use
2135them. They would sit in circles on the hall of the king's council
2136chamber, and scratch for fleas and pretend to be men; or they would
2137run in and out of the roofless houses and collect pieces of plaster
2138and old bricks in a corner, and forget where they had hidden them,
2139and fight and cry in scuffling crowds, and then break off to play up
2140and down the terraces of the king's garden, where they would shake
2141the rose trees and the oranges in sport to see the fruit and flowers
2142fall.
2143
2144=head2 v5.005_04-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
2145
2146L<Announced on 2004-02-05 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6aaeb6ec699bd116>
2147
2148Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had
2149plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to wonder what was
2150going to happen next. First, she tried to look down and make out what
2151she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything; then she looked
2152at the sides of the well, and noticed that they were filled with
2153cupboards and book-shelves; here and there she saw maps and pictures
2154hung upon pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves as she
2155passed; it was labelled 'ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great
2156disappointment it was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear
2157of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as
2158she fell past it.
2159
2160=head2 v1.0_16 - Johan Vromans, extemporarily
2161
2162L<Announced on 2003-12-18 by Richard Clamp|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9281dc6194d15940>
2163
4363636d
DG
2164=head1 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
2165
0e6b8110 2166This document was originally compiled based on a list of epigraphs
4363636d
DG
2167on L<Perl Monks|http://perlmonks.org> titled
2168L<Recent Perl Release Announcement|http://perlmonks.org/?node_id=372406>
2169by ysth.
2170
2171=cut
3e340399 2172
4363636d 2173# vim:tw=72: