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[perl5.git] / Porting / epigraphs.pod
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3=head1 NAME
4
0e6b8110 5perlepigraphs - list of Perl release epigraphs
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6
7=head1 DESCRIPTION
8
0e6b8110 9Many Perl release announcements included an I<epigraph>, a short excerpt
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10from a literary or other creative work, chosen by the pumpking or release
11manager. This file assembles the known list of epigraph for posterity,
12and also links to the release announcements in mailing list archives.
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14I<Note>: these have also been referred to as <epigrams>, but the
15definition of I<epigraph> is closer to the way they have been used.
16Consult your favorite dictionary for details.
17
18=head1 EPIGRAPHS
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20=head2 v5.15.9 - Bob Dylan - Blowin' In The Wind
21
22How many roads must a man walk down
23Before you call him a man?
24Yes, 'n' how many seas must a white dove sail
25Before she sleeps in the sand?
26Yes, 'n' how many times must the cannonballs fly
27Before they're forever banned?
28The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
29The answer is blowin' in the wind
30
31How many years can a mountain exist
32Before it's washed to the sea?
33Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
34Before they're allowed to be free?
35Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head
36Pretending he just doesn't see?
37The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
38The answer is blowin' in the wind
39
40How many times must a man look up
41Before he can see the sky?
42Yes, 'n' how many ears must one man have
43Before he can hear people cry?
44Yes, 'n' how many deaths will it take till he knows
45That too many people have died?
46The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
47The answer is blowin' in the wind
48
49 -- Bob Dylan, Spring 1962
50
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51=head2 v5.15.8 - The KLF - The Manual-How To Have A Number One The Easy Way
52
53L<Announced on 2012-02-20 by Max
54Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/02/msg183919.html>
55
56 "Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
57 Doctor Who, in the Tardis
58 Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
59 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who
60 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who"
61
62Gibberish of course, but every lad in the country under a certain
63age related instinctively to what it was about. The ones slightly
64older needed a couple of pints inside them to clear away the mind
65debris left by the passing years before it made sense. As for
66girls and our chorus, we think they must have seen it as pure crap.
67A fact that must have limited to zero our chances of staying at The
68Top for more than one week.
69
70Stock, Aitkin and Waterman, however, are kings of writing chorus
71lyrics that go straight to the emotional heart of the 7" single
72buying girls in this country. Their most successful records will kick
73into the chorus with a line which encapsulates the entire emotional
74meaning of the song. This will obviously be used as the title. As
75soon as Rick Astley hit the first line of the chorus on his debut
76single it was all over - the Number One position was guaranteed:
77
78 "I'm never going to give you up"
79
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80=head2 v5.15.7 - Penelope Lively, The Voyage of QV66
81
82L<Announced on 2012-01-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams
83|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/01/msg182230.html>
84
85"Laboratories," announced Henry. "Kindly don't touch anything."
86
87He led us into a long low brick shed. Outside there was a
88notice on a piece of board, crudely printed in red paint,
89which said GRATE SIENCE DISCOVERYS DONE HERE SSSH! BRING YOUR
90OWN BUKKIT NO PINCHING ANYWUN ELSE'S EXPERRYMENTS CANTEEN OPEN
91ALL DAY CHIMPS ONLY.
92
93There were a lot of large black monkeys inside, all intently
94busy on what they were doing. Some of them were pouring stuff
95out of bottles into buckets and carefully stirring the ensuing
96mixture; others were at work with glass tubes and jars, blowing
97and measuring and mixing; others were crouched over long benches
98with tools and heaps of bits and pieces of metal, cutting and
99bending and constructing. There was a great deal of noise and
100chatter. Every now and then one of them would give a whoop of
101excitement and all the others would gather round and jump up and
102down cheering and applauding.
103
104"Chimps," said Henry. "They're awfully clever."
105
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106=head2 v5.15.6 - Ursula K. Leguin, A Wizard of Earthsea
107
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108L<Announced on 2011-12-20 by Dave
109Rolsky|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/12/msg180962.html>
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110
111Ged had thought that as the prentice of a great mage he would enter at once
112into the mystery and mastery of power. He would understand the language of the
113beasts and the speech of the leaves of the forest, he thought, and sway the
114winds with his word, and learn to change himself into any shape he
115wished. Maybe he and his master would run together as stags, or fly to Re Albi
116over the mountain on the wings of eagles.
117
118But it was not so at all. They wandered, first down into the Vale and then
119gradually south and westward around the mountain, given lodging in little
120villages or spending the night out in the wilderness, like poor
121journeyman-sorcerers, or tinkers, or beggars. They entered no mysterious
122domain. Nothing happened. The mage's oaken staff that Ged had watched at first
123with eager dread was nothing but a stout staff to walk with. Three days went
124by and four days went by and still Ogion had not spoken a single charm in
125Ged's hearing, and had not taught him a single name or rune or spell.
126
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127=head2 v5.15.5 - Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman
128
129L<Announced on 2011-11-20 by Steve
130Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/11/msg179588.html>
131
132This day - is a day of the greatest solemnity! Spain has a king. He has
133been found. I am that king. Only this very day did I learn of it. I
134confess, it came to me suddenly in a flash of lightning. I don't understand
135how I could have thought and imagined that I was a titular councillor. How
136could such a wild notion enter my head? It's a good thing no one thought of
137putting me in an insane asylum. Now everything is laid open before me. Now
138I see everything as on the palm of my hand. And before, I don't understand,
139before everything around me was in some sort of fog. And all this happens, I
140think, because people imagine that the human brain is in the head. Not at
141all: it is brought by a wind from the direction of the Caspian Sea. First
142off, I announced to Mavra who I am. When she heard that the king of Spain
143was standing before her, she clasped her hands and nearly died of fright.
144The stupid woman had never seen a king of Spain before. However, I
145endeavoured to calm her down and assured her in gracious words of my
146benevolence and that I was not at all angry that she sometimes polished my
147boots poorly. They're benighted folk. It's impossible to tell them about
148lofty matters. She got frightened because she's convinced that all kings of
149Spain are like Philip II. But I explained to her that there was no
150resemblance between me and Philip II, and that I didn't have a single
151Capuchin . . . I didn't go to the office . . . To hell with it! No friends,
152you won't lure me there now; I'm not going to copy your vile papers!
153
154 -- Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman,
155 trans. Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky
156
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157=head2 v5.15.4 - Steve Jobs
158
159L<Announced on 2011-10-20 by Florian
160Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/10/msg178412.html>
161
162A lot of people in our industry haven't had very diverse experiences. So they
163don't have enough dots to connect, and they end up with very linear solutions
164without a broad perspective on the problem. The broader one's understanding of
165the human experience, the better design we will have.
166
c684cf36 167=head2 v5.14.2 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
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168
169L<Announced on 2011-09-26 by Florian
170Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177618.html>
171
172
173It's not so much that people don't value the programs after they have them--they
174do value them. But they're not the sort of thing that would ever catch on if
175they had to overcome the marketing barrier. (I don't yet know if perl will
176catch on at all--I'm worried enough about it that I specifically included an
177awk-to-perl translator just to help it catch on.) Maybe it's all just an
178inferiority complex. Or maybe I don't like to be mercenary.
179
180So I guess I'd say that the reason some software comes free is that the
181mechanism for selling it is missing, either from the work environment, or from
182the heart of the programmer.
183
184
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185=head2 v5.15.3 - Oscar Wilde, All Art is Quite Useless
186
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187L<Announced on 2011-09-20 by Stevan
188Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177427.html>
189
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190 All art is at once surface and symbol. Those who go beneath
191 the surface do so at their peril. Those who read the symbol
192 do so at their peril.
193
194 It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors.
195 Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the
196 work is new, complex, and vital. When critics disagree, the
197 artist is in accord with himself.
198
199 We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as
200 he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless
201 thing is that one admires it intensely.
202
203 All art is quite useless.
204
205 -- Oscar Wilde, From the preface to The Picture of Dorian Gray
206
207
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208=head2 v5.15.2 - Rainer Maria Rilke, The Third Duina Elegy
209
210L<Announced on 2011-08-20 by Ricardo
211Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-08/msg00694.html>
212
213True, it is strange to live no more on earth,
214no longer follow the folkways scarecely learned;
215not to give roses and other especially auspicious
216things the significance of a human future;
217to be no more what one was in infinitely anxious hands,
218and to put aside even one's name, like a broken plaything.
219Strange, to wish wishes no longer. Strange, to see
220all that was related fluttering so loosely in space.
221And being dead is hard, full of catching-up,
222so that finally one feels a little eternity.–
223But the living all make the mistake of too sharp discrimination.
224Often angels (it's said) don't know if they move
225among the quick or the dead. The eternal current
226hurtles all ages along with it forever
227through both realms and drowns their voices in both.
228
229 -- Rainer Maria Rilke, Duino, The First Elegy
230 trans., C. F. MacIntyre
231
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232=head2 v5.15.1 - Greg Egan, "Permutation City"
233
2ccefb8a 234L<Announced on 2011-07-20 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/07/msg175014.html>
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235
236Carter held out a hand towards the middle of the room. `See that
237fountain?' A ten-metre-wide marble wedding cake, topped with a
238winged cherub wrestling a serpent, duly appeared. Water cascaded
239down from a gushing wound in the cherub's neck. Carter said, `It's
240being computed by redundancies in the sketch of the city. I can
241extract the results, because I know exactly where to look for them --
242but nobody else would have a hope in hell of picking them out.'
243
244Peer walked up to the fountain. Even as he approached, he noticed
245that the spray was intangible; when he dipped his hand in the water
246around the base he felt nothing, and the motion he made with his
247fingers left the foaming surface unchanged. They were spying on
248the calculations, not interacting with them; the fountain was a
249closed system.
250
251Carter said, `In your case, of course, nobody will need to know
252the results. Except you -- and you'll know them because you'll
253/be/ them.'
254
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255=head2 v5.15.0 - Neil Gaiman, "The Graveyard Book"
256
257L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173748.html>
258
259 If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all
260 you will have gained.
261
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262=head2 v5.12.4 - William Schwenck Gilbert, "Trial By Jury"
263
264L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173725.html>
265
266You cannot eat breakfast all day,
267Nor is it the act of a sinner,
268When breakfast is taken away,
269To turn his attention to dinner;
270And it's not in the range of belief,
271To look upon him as a glutton,
272Who, when he is tired of beef,
273Determines to tackle the mutton.
274Ah! But this I am willing to say,
275If it will appease her sorrow,
276I'll marry this lady today,
277And I'll marry the other tomorrow!
278
c684cf36 279=head2 v5.14.1 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
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280
281L<Announced on 2011-06-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173650.html>
282
283At this point I'm no longer working for a company that makes me sign
284my life away, but by now I'm in the habit. Besides, I still harbor
285the deep-down suspicion that nobody would pay money for what I write,
286since most of it just helps you do something better that you could
287already do some other way. How much money would you personally pay
288to upgrade from readnews to rn? How much money would you pay for
289the patch program? As for warp, it's a mere game. And anything you
290can do with perl you can eventually do with an amazing and totally
291unreadable conglomeration of awk, sed, sh and C.
292
293=head2 v5.12.4-RC2 - James Russell Lowell, "Eleanor makes macaroons"
294
295L<Announced on 2011-06-15 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173609.html>
296
297Now for sugar, -- nay, our plan
298Tolerates no work of man.
299Hurry, then, ye golden bees;
300Fetch your clearest honey, please,
301Garnered on a Yorkshire moor,
302While the last larks sing and soar,
303From the heather-blossoms sweet
304Where sea-breeze and sunshine meet,
305And the Augusts mask as Junes, --
306Eleanor makes macaroons!
307
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308=head2 v5.12.4-RC1 - Ogden Nash, "The Clean Plater"
309
310L<Announced on 2011-06-08 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173352.html>
311
312Pheasant is pleasant, of course,
313And terrapin, too, is tasty,
314Lobster I freely endorse,
315In pate or patty or pasty.
316But there's nothing the matter with butter,
317And nothing the matter with jam,
318And the warmest greetings I utter
319To the ham and the yam and the clam.
320For they're food,
321All food,
322And I think very fondly of food.
323Through I'm broody at times
324When bothered by rhymes,
325I brood
326On food.
327
c684cf36 328=head2 v5.14.0 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
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329
330L<Announced on 2011-05-14 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172326.html>
331
332At the start of any project, I'm programming primarily to please
333myself. (The two chief virtues in a programmer are laziness and
334impatience.) After a while somebody looks over my shoulder and says,
335"That's neat. It'd be neater if it did such-and-so." So the thing
336gets neater. Pretty soon (a year or two) I have an rn, a warp, a patch,
337or a perl. One of these years I'll have a metaconfig.
338
339I then say to myself, "I don't want my life's work to die when this
340computer is scrapped, so I should let some other people use this. If I
341ask my company to sell this, it'll never see the light of day, and nobody
342would pay much for it anyway. If I sell it myself, I'll be in trouble with
343my company, to whom I signed my life away when I was hired. If I give it
344away, I can pretend it was worthless in the first place, so my company
345won't care. In any event, it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission."
346
347So a freely distributable program is born.
348
349=head2 v5.14.0-RC3 - American Airlines Gate Agent, last call
350
351L<Announced on 2011-05-11 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172282.html>
352
353This is the last call for flight 1697 with service to Chicago and
354continuing service to San Francisco. All passengers should already be
355aboard. If you aren't aboard at this time, you will be denied boarding
356and your bags will be offloaded.
357
358=head2 v5.14.0-RC2 - Greg Grandin, Fordlandia, "the Rise and Fall of Henry Ford's Forgotten Jungle City"
359
360L<Announced on 2011-05-04 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg171879.html>
361
362Over the course of nearly two decades, Ford would spend tens of millions
363of dollars founding not one but, after the plantation was defastated
364by leaf blight, two American towns, complete with central squares,
365sidewalks, indoor plumbing, hospitals, manicured lawns, movie theaters,
366swimming pools, golf courses, and, of course, Model Ts and As rolling
367down their paved streets.
368
369Back in America, newspapers kept up their drumbeat celebration, only
370obliquely referencing reports that things were not progressing as the
371company had hoped. But there was one note of skepticism. In late 1928,
372the Washington Post ran an editorial that read in its entirety: "Ford will
373govern a rubber plantation in Brazil larger than North Carolina. This is
374the first time he has applied quantity production methods to trouble"
375
376=head2 v5.14.0-RC1 - Bill Bryson, "In a Sunburned Country"
377
378L<Announced on 2011-04-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/04/msg171253.html>
379
380But then Australia is such a difficult country to keep track of. On
381my first visit, some years ago, I passed the time on the long flight
382reading a history of Australian politics in the twentieth century,
383wherein I encountered the startling fact that in 1967 the prime minister,
384Harold Holt, was strolling along a beach in Victoria when he plunged into
385the surf and vanished. No trace of the poor man was ever seen again.
386This seemed doubly astounding to meE<0x2014>first that Australia could
387just I<lose> a prime minister (I mean, come on) and second that news of
388this had never reached me.
389
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390=head2 v5.13.11 - Walt Whitman, L<Leaves of Grass|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leaves_of_Grass>
391
392L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-03/msg00560.html>
393
394 When the full-grown poet came,
395 Out spake pleased Nature (the round impassive globe, with all its
396 shows of day and night,) saying, He is mine;
397 But out spake too the Soul of man, proud, jealous and unreconciled,
398 Nay he is mine alone;
399 --Then the full-grown poet stood between the two, and took each
400 by the hand;
401 And to-day and ever so stands, as blender, uniter, tightly holding hands,
402 Which he will never release until he reconciles the two,
403 And wholly and joyously blends them.
404
c7bed260 405=head2 v5.13.10 - Egill Skalla-Grímsson, L<Egils saga Skalla-Grímssonar|http://www.heimskringla.no/wiki/Egils_saga_Skalla-Gr%C3%ADmssonar>
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fbc70a9e 407L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Ævar Arnfjörð Bjarmason|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/02/msg169340.html>
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409 Skalat maðr rúnar rísta,
410 nema ráða vel kunni.
411 Þat verðr mörgum manni,
412 es of myrkvan staf villisk.
413 Sák á telgðu talkni
414 tíu launstafi ristna.
415 Þat hefr lauka lindi
f1e17f6f 416 langs ofrtrega fengit.
30688243 417
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418=head2 v5.13.9 - John F Kennedy, L<Inaugural Address January 20, 1961|http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/John_F._Kennedy%27s_Inaugural_Address>
419
420L<Announced on 2011-01-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168335.html>
421
422In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been
423granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I
424do not shrink from this responsibility -- I welcome it. I do not believe
425that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other
426generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this
427endeavor will light our country and all who serve it. And the glow from
428that fire can truly light the world.
429
430And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you;
431ask what you can do for your country.
432
433My fellow citizens of the world, ask not what America will do for you,
434but what together we can do for the freedom of man.
435
436Finally, whether you are citizens of America or citizens of the world,
437ask of us here the same high standards of strength and sacrifice which
438we ask of you. With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history
439the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth to lead the land we love,
440asking His blessing and His help, but knowing that here on earth God's
441work must truly be our own.
442
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443=head2 v5.13.8 - Roger Williams, L<"The Fifth Gift"|http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/8/19/21304/8493>
444
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445L<Announced on 2010-12-19 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/12/msg167271.html>
446
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447The aliens called the box a "matter generator," but we'd be more inclined
448to call it a matter duplicator. By connecting switches and potentiometers
449between the copper posts it was possible to make the box mark off two
450cubic rectangular areas of volume. Make a certain contact, and these
451areas would be isolated within perfectly reflective fields. They could
452be expanded or contracted by altering resistances between other posts.
453As I worked out the user interface I built a little control panel for
454the device. It was actually a clever way for the aliens to do things;
455instead of trying to build controls we could use, they built us an
456interface we could attach to controls that made sense to us. It could
457also be automated.
458
459Once you had made the contact that established the shielded volumes,
460if you made another certain contact the contents of the first volume
461were copied to the second. The machine copied metal, plastic, steel,
462and diamond with equal ease. Copies of copies of copies of copies were
463indistinguishable from the originals at any magnification, even using
464techniques like X-ray crystallography.
465
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466=head2 v5.13.7 - Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski, 'The Matrix'
467
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468L<Announced on 2010-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/11/msg166162.html>
469
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470[Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one]
471
472Neo: Whoa. Deja vu.
473
474[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
475
476Trinity: What did you just say?
477Neo: Nothing. Just had a little deja vu.
478Trinity: What did you see?
479Cypher: What happened?
480Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just like it.
481Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat?
482Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure.
483Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
484Neo: What is it?
485Trinity: A deja vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when they change something.
486
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487=head2 v5.13.6 - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore"
488
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489L<Announced on 2010-10-20 by Tatsuhiko Miyagawa|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/10/msg165183.html>
490
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491The boy called Crow softly rests a hand on my shoulder, and with that
492he storm vanishes.
493
494"From now on -- no matter what -- you've got to be the world's toughest
495fifteen-year-old. That's the only way you're going to survive. And in order
496to do that, you've got to figure out what it means to be tough. You following
497me?"
498
499I keep my eyes closed and don't reply. I just want to sink off into sleep
500like this, his hand on my shoulder. I hear the faint flutter of wings.
501
502"You're going to be the world's toughest fifteen-year-old," Crow whispers
503as I try to fall asleep. Like he was carving the words in a deep blue tattoo
504on my heart.
505
506(Translated from Japanese by Philip Gabriel)
507
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508=head2 v5.13.5 - Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, "The Room in the Dragon Volant"
509
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511
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512Candle in hand I stepped in. I do not know whether the quality of
513air, long undisturbed, is peculiar; to me it has always seemed so, and
514the damp smell of the old masonry hung in this atmosphere. My candle
515faintly lighted the bare stone wall that enclosed the stair, the foot
516of which I could not see. Down I went, and a few turns brought me to
517the stone floor. Here was another door, of the simple, old, oak kind,
518deep sunk in the thickness of the wall. The large end of the key
519fitted this. The lock was stiff; I set the candle down upon the
520stair, and applied both hands; it turned with difficulty, and as it
521revolved, uttered a shriek that alarmed me for my secret.
522
523For some minutes I did not move. In a little time, however, I took
524courage, and opened the door. The night-air floating in puffed out
525the candle. There was a thicket of holly and underwood, as dense as a
526jungle, close about the door. I should have been in pitch-darkness,
527were it not that through the topmost leaves there twinkled, here and
528there, a glimmer of moonshine.
529
530Softly, lest any one should have opened his window at the sound of the
531rusty bolt, I struggled through this till I gained a view of the open
532grounds. Here I found that the brushwood spread a good way up the
533park, uniting with the wood that approached the little temple I have
806849f8 534described.
f6c56125 535
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536=head2 v5.13.4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
537
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538L<Announced on 2010-08-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163150.html>
539
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540`How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought Alice;
541`I might as well be at school at once.' However, she got up, and began to repeat
542it, but her head was so full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what
543she was saying, and the words came very queer indeed:--
544
545 "'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare,
546 "You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair."
547 As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose
548 Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.'
549
550
551`That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' said the Gryphon.
552
553`Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it sounds uncommon
554nonsense.'
555
556Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if
557anything would ever happen in a natural way again.
558
559`I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle.
560
561`She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with the next verse.'
562
563`But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How could he turn them out
564with his nose, you know?'
565
566`It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was dreadfully puzzled by
567the whole thing, and longed to change the subject.
568
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569=head2 v5.13.3 - Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, "Good Omens"
570
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571L<Announced on 2010-07-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/07/msg162230.html>
572
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573Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading towards
574Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would
575notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth,
576for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his
577sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint.
578
579Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was
580dammned if he wasn't going to finish it in the Bentley as well.
581Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of
582motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage
583Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn't have been able to tell
584that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it
585had ever even been a car.
586
587There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have
588been black, where it wasn't a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but
589this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of
590flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult
591re-entry.
592
593There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the
594metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still
595somhow riding an inch above the road surface this didn't seem to
596make an awful lot of difference to the suspension.
597
598It should have fallen apart miles back.
599
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600=head2 v5.13.2 - Iain M Banks, "Use of Weapons"
601
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602L<Announced on 2010-06-22 by Matt S Trout|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/06/msg161112.html>
603
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604We deal in the moral equivalent of black holes, where the normal laws -
605the rules of right and wrong that people imagine apply everywhere else
606in the universe - break down; beyond those metaphysical event-horizons,
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607there exist ... special circumstances.
608
609=head2 v5.13.1 - Miguel de Unamuno, "The Sepulchre of Don Quixote"
d069c093 610
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612
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613And if anyone shall come to you and say that he knows how to construct
614bridges and that perhaps a time will come when you will wish to avail
615yourself of his science in order to cross over a river, out with him! Out
616with the engineer! Rivers will be crossed by wading or swimming them, even
617if half the crusaders drown themselves. Let the engineer go off and build
618bridges somewhere else, where they are badly wanted. For those who go in
619quest of the sepulchre, faith is bridge enough.
620
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621=head2 v5.13.0 - Jules Verne, "A Journey to the Centre of the Earth"
622
623L<Announced on 2010-04-20 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg159275.html>
624
625The heat still remained at quite a supportable degree. With an
626involuntary shudder, I reflected on what the heat must have been
627when the volcano of Sneffels was pouring its smoke, flames, and
628streams of boiling lava -- all of which must have come up by the
629road we were now following. I could imagine the torrents of hot
630seething stone darting on, bubbling up with accompaniments of
631smoke, steam, and sulphurous stench!
632
633"Only to think of the consequences," I mused, "if the old
634volcano were once more to set to work."
635
636=head2 v5.12.3 - Howard W. Campbell, Jr., "Reflections on Not Participating in Current Events"
637
638L<Announced on 2011-01-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168368.html>
639
640 I saw a huge steam roller,
641 It blotted out the sun.
642 The people all lay down, lay down;
643 They did not try to run.
644 My love and I, we looked amazed
645 Upon the gory mystery.
646 'Lie down, lie down!' the people cried.
647 'The great machine is history!'
648 My love and I, we ran away,
649 The engine did not find us.
650 We ran up to a mountain top,
651 Left history far behind us.
652 Perhaps we should have stayed and died,
653 But somehow we don't think so.
654 We went to see where history'd been,
655 And my, the dead did stink so.
656
657=head2 v5.12.2 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
658
659L<Announced on 2010-09-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg163852.html>
660
661CPUs. Cayce Pollard Units. That's what Damien calls the clothing
662she wears. CPUs are either black, white, or gray, and ideally
663seem to have come into this world without human intervention.
664
665What people take for relentless minimalism is a side effect
666of too much exposure to the reactor-cores of fashion. This
667has resulted in a remorseless paring-down of what she can and
668will wear. She is, literally, allergic to fashion. She can
669only tolerate things that could have been worn, to a general
670lack of comment, during any year between 1945 and 2000. She's a
671design-free zone, a one-woman school of and whose very austerity
672periodically threatens to spawn its own cult.
673
674=head2 v5.12.2-RC1 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
675
676L<Announced on 2010-08-31 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163670.html>
677
678The front page opens, familiar as a friend's living room. A frame-grab
679from #48 serves as backdrop, dim and almost monochrome, no characters in
680view. This is one of the sequences that generate comparisons with
681Tarkovsky. She only knows Tarkovsky from stills, really, though she did
682once fall asleep during a screening of The Stalker, going under on an
683endless pan, the camera aimed straight down, in close-up, at a puddle on
684a ruined mosaic floor. But she is not one of those who think that much
685will be gained by analysis of the maker's imagined influences. The cult
686of the footage is rife with subcults, claiming every possible influence.
687Truffaut, Peckinpah -- The Peckinpah people, among the least likely, are
688still waiting for the guns to be drawn.
689
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690=head2 v5.12.1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
691
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692L<Announced on 2010-05-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160109.html>
693
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694"Now suppose," chortled Dr. Breed, enjoying himself, "that there were
695many possible ways in which water could crystallize, could freeze.
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696Suppose that the sort of ice we skate upon and put into highballs --
697what we might call ice-one -- is only one of several types of ice.
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698Suppose water always froze as ice-one on Earth because it had never
699had a seed to teach it how to form ice-two, ice-three, ice-four
700...? And suppose," he rapped on his desk with his old hand again,
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701"that there were one form, which we will call ice-nine -- a crystal as
702hard as this desk -- with a melting point of, let us say, one-hundred
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703degrees Fahrenheit, or, better still, a melting point of one-hundred-
704and-thirty degrees."
705
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706=head2 v5.12.1-RC2 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
707
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708L<Announced on 2010-05-13 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160066.html>
709
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710San Lorenzo was fifty miles long and twenty miles wide, I learned from
711the supplement to the New York Sunday Times. Its population was four
712hundred, fifty thousand souls, "...all fiercely dedicated to the ideals
713of the Free World."
714
715Its highest point, Mount McCabe, was eleven thousand feet above sea
716level. Its capital was Bolivar, "...a strikingly modern city built on a
717harbor capable of sheltering the entire United States Navy." The principal
718exports were sugar, coffee, bananas, indigo, and handcrafted novelties.
719
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720=head2 v5.12.1-RC1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
721
722L<Announced on 2010-05-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg159971.html>
4363636d 723
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724Which brings me to the Bokononist concept of a wampeter. A wampeter is
725the pivot of a karass. No karass is without a wampeter, Bokonon tells us,
726just as no wheel is without a hub. Anything can be a wampeter: a tree,
727a rock, an animal, an idea, a book, a melody, the Holy Grail. Whatever
728it is, the members of its karass revolve about it in the majestic chaos
729of a spiral nebula. The orbits of the members of a karass about their
730common wampeter are spiritual orbits, naturally. It is souls and not
731bodies that revolve. As Bokonon invites us to sing:
732
733 Around and around and around we spin,
734 With feet of lead and wings of tin . . .
735
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736=head2 v5.12.0 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
737
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738L<Announced on 2010-04-12 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158820.html>
739
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740'Please would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, for she was
741not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, 'why
742your cat grins like that?'
743
744'It's a Cheshire cat,' said the Duchess, 'and that's why. Pig!'
745
746She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite
747jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby,
748and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:--
749
750'I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know
751that cats COULD grin.'
752
753'They all can,' said the Duchess; 'and most of 'em do.'
754
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755=head2 v5.12.0-RC5 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
756
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758
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759'Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly; 'some of the words
760have got altered.'
761
762'It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar decidedly, and
763there was silence for some minutes.
764
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765=head2 v5.12.0-RC4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
766
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768
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769'It was much pleasanter at home,' thought poor Alice, 'when one wasn't
770always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and
771rabbits. I almost wish I hadn't gone down that rabbit-hole--and yet--and
772yet--it's rather curious, you know, this sort of life! I do wonder what
773can have happened to me! When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that
774kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one!
775
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776=head2 v5.12.0-RC3 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
777
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778L<Announced on 2010-04-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158346.html>
779
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780At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them,
781called out, 'Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL soon make you
782dry enough!' They all sat down at once, in a large ring, with the Mouse
783in the middle. Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt
784sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon.
785
786'Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, 'are you all ready? This
787is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! "William
788the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was soon submitted
789to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of late much
790accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of
d517a16a 791Mercia and Northumbria --"'
4363636d 792
2831a86c 793=head2 v5.12.0-RC2 - no announcement
4363636d 794
2831a86c 795Available on CPAN since 2010-04-01.
4363636d 796
3e340399 797=head2 v5.12.0-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
4363636d 798
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799L<Announced on 2010-03-29 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg158060.html>
800
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801So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the
802hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of
803making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and
804picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran
805close by her.
806
807There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice think it so
808VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, 'Oh dear! Oh
809dear! I shall be late!' (when she thought it over afterwards, it
810occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this, but at the time
811it all seemed quite natural); but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH
812OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on,
813Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had
814never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to
815take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the field
816after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large
817rabbit-hole under the hedge.
818
819In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how
820in the world she was to get out again.
821
0e6b8110 822=head2 v5.12.0-RC0 - no epigraph
4363636d 823
2831a86c 824L<Announced on 2020-03-21 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg157761.html>
4363636d 825
3e340399 826=head2 v5.11.5 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "Christabel"
4363636d 827
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828L<Announced on 2010-02-21 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/02/msg156957.html>
829
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830 A little child, a limber elf,
831 Singing, dancing to itself,
832 A fairy thing with red round cheeks,
833 That always finds, and never seeks,
834 Makes such a vision to the sight
835 As fills a father's eyes with light;
836 And pleasures flow in so thick and fast
837 Upon his heart, that he at last
838 Must needs express his love's excess
839 With words of unmeant bitterness.
840 Perhaps 'tis pretty to force together
841 Thoughts so all unlike each other;
842 To mutter and mock a broken charm,
843 To dally with wrong that does no harm.
844 Perhaps 'tis tender too and pretty
845 At each wild word to feel within
846 A sweet recoil of love and pity.
847 And what, if in a world of sin
848 (O sorrow and shame should this be true!)
849 Such giddiness of heart and brain
850 Comes seldom save from rage and pain,
851 So talks as it's most used to do.
852
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853=head2 v5.11.4 - Fyodor Dostoevsky, "Crime and Punishment"
854
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855L<Announced on 2010-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/01/msg155848.html>
856
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857And you don't suppose that I went into it headlong like a fool? I went
858into it like a wise man, and that was just my destruction. And you
859mustn't suppose that I didn't know, for instance, that if I began to
860question myself whether I had the right to gain power -- I certainly
861hadn't the right -- or that if I asked myself whether a human being is a
862louse it proved that it wasn't so for me, though it might be for a man
863who would go straight to his goal without asking questions.... If I
864worried myself all those days, wondering whether Napoleon would have
865done it or not, I felt clearly of course that I wasn't Napoleon.
866
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867=head2 v5.11.3 - Mark Twain, "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer"
868
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869L<Announced on 2009-12-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/12/msg154838.html>
870
4363636d 871"Say -- I'm going in a swimming, I am. Don't you wish you could? But of
d517a16a 872course you'd druther work -- wouldn't you? Course you would!"
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873
874Tom contemplated the boy a bit, and said: "What do you call work?"
875
876"Why ain't that work?"
877
878Tom resumed his whitewashing, and answered carelessly: "Well, maybe it
879is, and maybe it aint. All I know, is, it suits Tom Sawyer."
880
881"Oh come, now, you don't mean to let on that you like it?"
882
883The brush continued to move. "Like it? Well I don't see why I oughtn't
884to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?"
885
886That put the thing in a new light. Ben stopped nibbling his apple. Tom
887swept his brush daintily back and forth -- stepped back to note the effect
888-- added a touch here and there-criticised the effect again -- Ben
889watching every move and getting more and more interested, more and more
890absorbed. Presently he said: "Say, Tom, let me whitewash a little."
891
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892=head2 v5.11.2 - Michael Marshall Smith, "Only Forward"
893
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894L<Announced on 2009-11-20 by |http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/11/msg153646.html>
895
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896The streets were pretty quiet, which was nice. They're always quiet here
897at that time: you have to be wearing a black jacket to be out on the
898streets between seven and nine in the evening, and not many people in
899the area have black jackets. It's just one of those things. I currently
900live in Colour Neighbourhood, which is for people who are heavily into
901colour. All the streets and buildings are set for instant colourmatch:
902as you walk down the road they change hue to offset whatever you're
903wearing. When the streets are busy it's kind of intense, and anyone
904prone to epileptic seizures isn't allowed to live in the Neighbourhood,
905however much they're into colour.
906
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907=head2 v5.11.1 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
908
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909L<Announced on 2009-10-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg152360.html>
910
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911Milo had been caught red-handed in the act of plundering his countrymen,
912and, as a result, his stock had never been higher. He proved good as his
913word when a rawboned major from Minnesota curled his lip in rebellious
914disavowal and demanded his share of the syndicate Milo kept saying
915everybody owned. Milo met the challenge by writing the words "A Share"
916on the nearest scrap of paper and handing it away with a virtuous disdain
917that won the envy and admiration of almost everyone who knew him. His
918glory was at a peak, and Colonel Cathcart, who knew and admired his
919war record, was astonished by the deferential humility with which Mil
920presented himself at Group Headquarters and made his fantastic appeal
921for more hazardous assignment.
922
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923=head2 v5.11.0 - Mikhail Bulgakov, "The Master and Margarita"
924
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925L<Announced on 2009-10-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg151376.html>
926
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927Whispers of an "evil power" were heard in lines at dairy shops, in
928streetcars, stores, arguments, kitchens, suburban and long-distance
929trains, at stations large and small, in dachas and on beaches. Needless
930to say, truly mature and cultured people did not tell these stories
931about an evil power's visit to the capital. In fact, they even made fun
932of them and tried to talk sense into those who told them. Nevertheless,
933facts are facts, as they say, and cannot simply be dismissed without
934explanation: somebody had visited the capital. The charred cinders of
935Griboyedov alone, and many other things besides, confirmed it. Cultured
936people shared the point of view of the investigating team: it was the
937work of a gang of hypnotists and ventriloquists magnificently skilled in
938their art.
939
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940=head2 v5.10.1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
941
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943
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944'Briefly, sir, I am the Permanent Under-Secretary of State, known as
945the Permanent Secretary. Woolley here is your Principal Private
946Secretary. I, too, have a Principal Private Secretary, and he is the
947Principal Private Secretary to the Permanent Secretary. Directly
948responsible to me are ten Deputy Secretaries, eighty-seven Under
949Secretaries and two hundred and nineteen Assistant Secretaries.
950Directly responsible to the Principal Private Secretaries are plain
951Private Secretaries. The Prime Minister will be appointing two
952Parliamentary Under-Secretaries and you will be appointing your own
953Parliamentary Private Secretary.'
954
955'Can they all type?' I joked.
956
957'None of us can type, Minister,' replied Sir Humphrey smoothly. 'Mrs
958McKay types - she is your Secretary.'
959
960I couldn't tell whether or not he was joking. 'What a pity,' I said.
961'We could have opened an agency.'
962
963Sir Humphrey and Bernard laughed. 'Very droll, sir,' said Sir
964Humphrey. 'Most amusing, sir,' said Bernard. Were they genuinely
965amused at my wit, or just being rather patronising? 'I suppose they
966all say that, do they?' I ventured.
967
968Sir Humphrey reassured me on that. 'Certainly not, Minister,' he
969replied. 'Not quite all.'
970
0e6b8110 971=head2 v5.10.1-RC2 - no epigraph
4363636d 972
2831a86c 973L<Announced on 2009-08-18 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150015.html>
3e340399 974
0e6b8110 975=head2 v5.10.1-RC1 - no epigraph
4363636d 976
2831a86c 977L<Announced on 2009-08-06 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg149498.html>
3e340399 978
c7bed260 979=head2 v5.10.0 - Laurence Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
4363636d 980
c7bed260
Z
981L<Announced on 2007-12-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/12/msg131636.html>
982
983He would often declare, in speaking his thoughts upon the subject, that
984he did not conceive how the greatest family in England could stand it
985out against an uninterrupted succession of six or seven short
986noses.--And for the contrary reason, he would generally add, That it
987must be one of the greatest problems in civil life, where the same
988number of long and jolly noses, following one another in a direct line,
989did not raise and hoist it up into the best vacancies in the kingdom.
990
991=head2 v5.10.0-RC2 - no epigraph
992
993L<Announced on 2007-11-25 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130978.html>
994
995=head2 v5.10.0-RC1 - no epigraph
996
997L<Announced on 2007-11-17 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130653.html>
998
999=head2 v5.9.5 - no announcement
1000
1001L<Pre-announced on 2007-07-07 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/07/msg126358.html>,
1002available on CPAN with same date, but never actually announced.
1003
1004=head2 v5.9.4 - no epigraph
1005
1006L<Announced on 2006-08-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/08/msg115782.html>
1007
1008=head2 v5.9.3 - no epigraph
1009
1010L<Announced on 2006-01-28 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg109086.html>
1011
1012=head2 v5.9.2 - Thomas Pynchon, "V"
1013
1014L<Announced on 2005-04-01 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20050401150702.2b4a70d5@grubert.mandrakesoft.com>
1015
1016This word flip was weird. Every recording date of McClintic's he'd
1017gotten into the habit of talking electricity with the audio men and
1018technicians of the studio. McClintic once couldn't have cared less
1019about electricity, but now it seemed if that was helping him reach a
1020bigger audience, some digging, some who would never dig, but all
1021paying and those royalties keeping the Triumph in gas and McClintic
1022in J. Press suits, then McClintic ought to be grateful to
1023electricity, ought maybe to learn a little more about it. So he'd
1024picked up some here and there, and one day last summer he got around
1025to talking stochastic music and digital computers with one
1026technician. Out of the conversation had come Set/Reset, which was
1027getting to be a signature for the group. He had found out from this
1028sound man about a two-triode circuit called a flip-flop, which when
1029it turned on could be one of two ways, depending on which tube was
1030conducting and which was cut off: set or reset, flip or flop.
1031
1032"And that," the man said, "can be yes or no, or one or zero. And
1033that is what you might call one of the basic units, or specialized
1034`cells' in a big `electronic brain.' "
1035
1036"Crazy," said McClintic, having lost him back there someplace. But
1037one thing that did occur to him was if a computer's brain could go
1038flip or flop, why so could a musician's. As long as you were flop,
1039everything was cool. But where did the trigger-pulse come from to
1040make you flip?
1041
1042=head2 v5.9.1 - Tom Stoppard, "Arcadia"
1043
1044L<Announced on 2004-03-16 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/8587d77c565f2d43>
1045
1046Aren't you supposed to have a pony?
1047
1048=head2 v5.9.0 - Doris Lessing, "Martha Quest"
1049
1050L<Announced on 2003-10-27 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/63a8c34385de82a1>
1051
1052What of October, that ambiguous month
4363636d 1053
4363636d
DG
1054=head2 v5.8.9 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1055
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1056L<Announced on 2008-12-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/12/msg142571.html>
1057
4363636d
DG
1058Frank and I, unlike the civil servants, were still puzzled that such a
1059proposal as the Europass could even be seriously under consideration by
1060the FCO. We can both see clearly that it is wonderful ammunition for the
1061anti-Europeans. I asked Humphrey if the Foreign Office doesn't realise
1062how damaging this would be to the European ideal?
1063
1064'I'm sure they do, Minister, he said. That's why they support it.'
1065
1066This was even more puzzling, since I'd always been under the impression
1067that the FO is pro-Europe. 'Is it or isn't it?' I asked Humphrey.
1068
1069'Yes and no,' he replied of course, 'if you'll pardon the
1070expression. The Foreign Office is pro-Europe because it is really
1071anti-Europe. In fact the Civil Service was united in its desire to make
1072sure the Common Market didn't work. That's why we went into it.'
1073
1074This sounded like a riddle to me. I asked him to explain further. And
1075basically his argument was as follows: Britain has had the same foreign
1076policy objective for at least the last five hundred years - to create a
1077disunited Europe. In that cause we have fought with the Dutch against
1078the Spanish, with the Germans against the French, with the French and
1079Italians against the Germans, and with the French against the Italians
1080and Germans. [The Dutch rebellion against Phillip II of Spain, the
1081Napoleonic Wars, the First World War, and the Second World War - Ed.]
1082
1083In other words, divide and rule. And the Foreign Office can see no
1084reason to change when it has worked so well until now.
1085
1086I was aware of this, naturally, but I regarded it as ancient history.
1087Humphrey thinks that it is, in fact, current policy. It was necessary
1088for us to break up the EEC, he explained, so we had to get inside. We
1089had previously tried to break it up from the outside, but that didn't
1090work. [A reference to our futile and short-lived involvement in EFTA,
1091the European Free Trade Association, founded in 1960 and which the UK
1092left in 1972 - Ed.] Now that we're in, we are able to make a complete
1093pig's breakfast out of it. We've now set the Germans against the French,
1094the French against the Italians, the Italians against the Dutch... and
1095the Foreign office is terribly happy. It's just like old time.
1096
1097I was staggered by all of this. I thought that the all of us who are
1098publicly pro-European believed in the European ideal. I said this to Sir
1099Humphrey, and he simply chuckled.
1100
1101So I asked him: if we don't believe in the European Ideal, why are we
1102pushing to increase the membership?
1103
1104'Same reason,' came the reply. 'It's just like the United Nations. The
1105more members it has, the more arguments you can stir up, and the more
1106futile and impotent it becomes.'
1107
1108This all strikes me as the most appalling cynicism, and I said so.
1109
1110Sir Humphrey agreed completely. 'Yes Minister. We call it
1111diplomacy. It's what made Britain great, you know.'
1112
4363636d
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1113=head2 v5.8.9-RC2 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1114
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1115L<Announced on 2008-12-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg142422.html>
1116
4363636d
DG
1117There was silence in the office. I didn't know what we were going to do
1118about the four hundred new people supervising our economy drive or the
1119four hundred new people for the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office, or
1120anything! I simply sat and waited and hoped that my head would stop
1121thumping and that some idea would be suggested by someone sometime soon.
1122
1123Sir Humphrey obliged. 'Minister... if we were to end the economy drive
1124and close the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office we could issue an immediate
1125press announcement that you had axed eight hundred jobs.' He had
1126obviously thought this out carefully in advance, for at this moment he
1127produced a slim folder from under his arm. 'If you'd like to approve
1128this draft...'
1129
1130I couldn't believe the impertinence of the suggestion. Axed eight
1131hundred jobs? 'But no one was ever doing these jobs,' I pointed out
1132incredulously. 'No one's been appointed yet.'
1133
1134'Even greater economy,' he replied instantly. 'We've saved eight hundred
1135redundancy payments as well.'
1136
1137'But...' I attempted to explain '... that's just phony. It's dishonest,
1138it's juggling with figures, it's pulling the wool over people's eyes.'
1139
1140'A government press release, in fact.' said Humphrey.
1141
4363636d
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1142=head2 v5.8.9-RC1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1143
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1144L<Announced on 2008-11-10 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg141515.html>
1145
4363636d
DG
1146A jumbo jet touched down, with BURANDAN AIRWAYS written on the side. I
1147was hugely impressed. British Airways are having to pawn their Concordes,
1148and here is this little tiny African state with its own airline, jumbo
1149jets and all.
1150
1151I asked Bernard how many planes Burandan Airways had. 'None,' he said.
1152
1153I told him not to be silly and use his eyes. 'No Minister, it belongs to
1154Freddie Laker,' he said. 'They chartered it last week and repainted it
1155specially.' Apparently most of the Have-Nots (I mean, LDCs) do this - at
1156the opening of the UN General Assembly the runways of Kennedy Airport are
1157jam-packed with phoney flag-carriers. 'In fact,' said Bernard with a sly
1158grin, 'there was one 747 that belonged to nine different African airlines
1159in a month. They called it the mumbo-jumbo.'
1160
1161While we watched nothing much happening on the TV except the mumbo-jumbo
1162taxiing around Prestwick and the Queen looking a bit chilly, Bernard gave
1163me the next day's schedule and explained that I was booked on the night
1164sleeper from King's Cross to Edinburgh because I had to vote in a
1165three-line whip at the House tonight and would have to miss the last
1166plane. Then the commentator, in that special hushed BBC voice used for any
1167occasion with which Royalty is connected, announced reverentially that we
1168were about to catch our first glimpse of President Selim.
1169
1170And out of the plane stepped Charlie. My old friend Charlie Umtali. We
1171were at LSE together. Not Selim Mohammed at all, but Charlie.
1172
1173Bernard asked me if I were sure. Silly question. How could you forget a
1174name like Charlie Umtali?
1175
1176I sent Bernard for Sir Humphrey, who was delighted to hear that we now
1177know something about our official visitor.
1178
1179Bernard's official brief said nothing. Amazing! Amazing how little the FCO
1180has been able to find out. Perhaps they were hoping it would all be on the
1181car radio. All the brief says is that Colonel Selim Mohammed had converted
1182to Islam some years ago, they didn't know his original name, and therefore
1183knew little of his background.
1184
1185I was able to tell Humphrey and Bernard /all/ about his background.
1186Charlie was a red-hot political economist, I informed them. Got the top
1187first. Wiped the floor with everyone.
1188
1189Bernard seemed relieved. 'Well that's all right then.'
1190
1191'Why?' I enquired.
1192
1193'I think Bernard means,' said Sir Humphrey helpfully, 'that he'll know how
1194to behave if he was at an English University. Even if it was the LSE.' I
1195never know whether or not Humphrey is insulting me intentionally.
1196
1197Humphrey was concerned about Charlie's political colour. 'When you said
1198that he was red-hot, were you speaking politically?'
1199
1200In a way I was. 'The thing about Charlie is that you never quite know
1201where you are with him. He's the sort of chap who follows you into a
1202revolving door and comes out in front.'
1203
1204'No deeply held convictions?' asked Sir Humphrey.
1205
1206'No. The only thing Charlie was committed too was Charlie.'
1207
1208'Ah, I see. A politician, Minister.'
1209
4363636d
DG
1210=head2 v5.8.8 - Joe Raposo, "Bein' Green"
1211
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1212L<Announced on 2006-02-01 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/28caf52e41ebe723>
1213
51caa79e
DG
1214 It's not that easy bein' green
1215 Having to spend each day the color of the leaves
4363636d 1216 When I think it could be nicer being red or yellow or gold
51caa79e
DG
1217 Or something much more colorful like that
1218
1219 It's not easy bein' green
4363636d 1220 It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things
51caa79e
DG
1221 And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're
1222 Not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water
1223 Or stars in the sky
1224
1225 But green's the color of Spring
1226 And green can be cool and friendly-like
1227 And green can be big like an ocean
1228 Or important like a mountain
4363636d
DG
1229 Or tall like a tree
1230
1231 When green is all there is to be
1232 It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why?
1233 Wonder I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful
1234 And I think it's what I want to be
1235
4363636d
DG
1236=head2 v5.8.8-RC1 - Cosgrove Hall Productions, "Dangermouse"
1237
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1238L<Announced on 2006-01-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/d231fc554af8cc51>
1239
1240Greenback: And the world is mine, all mine. Muhahahahaha. See to it!
51caa79e 1241
2831a86c 1242Stiletto: Si, Barone. Subito, Barone.
4363636d 1243
4363636d
DG
1244=head2 v5.8.7 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
1245
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1246L<Announced on 2005-05-31 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9a545704a0062f16>
1247
4363636d
DG
1248And now, imagine the triumphant procession: Peter at the head; after him the
1249hunters leading the wolf; and winding up the procession, grandfather and the
1250cat.
1251
1252Grandfather shook his head discontentedly: "Well, and if Peter hadn't caught
51caa79e 1253the wolf? What then?"
4363636d 1254
4363636d
DG
1255=head2 v5.8.7-RC1 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
1256
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1257L<Announced on 2005-05-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/05/msg100711.html>
1258
4363636d
DG
1259And now this is how things stood: The cat was sitting on one branch. The
1260bird on another, not too close to the cat. And the wolf walked round and
1261round the tree, looking at them with greedy eyes.
1262
1263In the meantime, Peter, without the slightest fear, stood behind the
1264gate, watching all that was going on. He ran home,got a strong rope and
1265climbed up the high stone wall.
1266
1267One of the branches of the tree, around which the wolf was walking,
1268stretched out over the wall.
1269
1270Grabbing hold of the branch, Peter lightly climbed over on to the tree.
1271Peter said to the bird: "Fly down and circle round the wolf's head, only
1272take care that he doesn't catch you!".
1273
1274The bird almost touched the wolf's head with its wings, while the wolf
1275snapped angrily at him from this side and that.
1276
1277How that bird teased the wolf, how that wolf wanted to catch him! But
51caa79e 1278the bird was clever and the wolf simply couldn't do anything about it.
4363636d 1279
4363636d
DG
1280=head2 v5.8.6 - A. A. Milne, "The House at Pooh Corner"
1281
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1282L<Announced on 2004-11-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20041128000836.GA304@Bagpuss.unfortu.net>
1283
4363636d 1284"Hallo, Pooh," said Piglet, giving a jump of surprise. "I knew it was
51caa79e 1285you."
4363636d 1286
51caa79e 1287"So did I,", said Pooh. "What are you doing?"
4363636d
DG
1288
1289"I'm planting a haycorn, Pooh, so that it can grow up into an oak-tree,
1290and have lots of haycorns just outside the front door instead of having
51caa79e 1291to walk miles and miles, do you see, Pooh?"
4363636d 1292
51caa79e 1293"Supposing it doesn't?" said Pooh.
4363636d
DG
1294
1295"It will, because Christopher Robin says it will, so that's why I'm
1296planting it."
1297
1298"Well," aid Pooh, "if I plant a honeycomb outside my house, then it will
51caa79e 1299grow up into a beehive."
4363636d 1300
51caa79e 1301Piglet wasn't quite sure about this.
4363636d
DG
1302
1303"Or a /piece/ of a honeycomb," said Pooh, "so as not to waste too much.
1304Only then I might only get a piece of a beehive, and it might be the
51caa79e 1305wrong piece, where the bees were buzzing and not hunnying. Bother"
4363636d 1306
51caa79e 1307Piglet agreed that that would be rather bothering.
4363636d
DG
1308
1309"Besides, Pooh, it's a very difficult thing, planting unless you know
1310how to do it," he said; and he put the acorn in the hole he had made,
51caa79e 1311and covered it up with earth, and jumped on it.
4363636d 1312
4363636d
DG
1313=head2 v5.8.6-RC1 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie the Pooh"
1314
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1315L<Announced on 2004-11-11 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/11/msg95786.html>
1316
4363636d
DG
1317"Hallo!" said Piglet, "whare are /you/ doing?"
1318
1319"Hunting," said Pooh.
1320
1321"Hunting what?"
1322
1323"Tracking something," said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously.
1324
1325"Tracking what?" said Piglet, coming closer.
1326
1327"That's just what I ask myself, I ask myself, What?"
1328
1329"What do you think you'll answer?"
1330
1331"I shall have to wait until I catch up with it," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
1332"Now, look there." He pointed to the ground in front of him. "What do
1333you see there?"
1334
1335"Track," said Piglet. "Paw-marks." He gave a little squeak of
1336excitement. "Oh, Pooh!" Do you think it's a--a--a Woozle?"
1337
4363636d
DG
1338=head2 v5.8.5 - wikipedia, "Yew"
1339
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1340L<Announced on 2004-07-19 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/68340e2e4c39222c>
1341
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DG
1342Yews are relatively slow growing trees, widely used in landscaping and
1343ornamental horticulture. They have flat, dark-green needles, reddish
1344bark, and bear seeds with red arils, which are eaten by thrushes,
1345waxwings and other birds, dispersing the hard seeds undamaged in their
1346droppings. Yew wood is reddish brown (with white sapwood), and very
1347hard. It was traditionally used to make bows, especially the English
1348longbow.
1349
1350In England, the Common Yew (Taxus baccata, also known as English Yew) is
1351often found in churchyards. It is sometimes suggested that these are
1352placed there as a symbol of long life or trees of death, and some are
1353likely to be over 3,000 years old. It is also suggested that yew trees
1354may have a pre-Christian association with old pagan holy sites, and the
1355Christian church found it expedient to use and take over existing sites.
1356Another explanation is that the poisonous berries and foliage discourage
1357farmers and drovers from letting their animals wander into the burial
1358grounds. The yew tree is a frequent symbol in the Christian poetry of
51caa79e 1359T.S. Eliot, especially his Four Quartets.
4363636d 1360
4363636d
DG
1361=head2 v5.8.5-RC2 - wikipedia, "Beech"
1362
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1363L<Announced on 2004-07-09 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/f92175725af7a5ad>
1364
4363636d
DG
1365Beeches are trees of the Genus Fagus, family Fagaceae, including about
1366ten species in Europe, Asia, and North America. The leaves are entire or
1367sparsely toothed. The fruit is a small, sharply-angled nut, borne in
1368pairs in spiny husks. The beech most commonly grown as an ornamental or
1369shade tree is the European beech (Fagus sylvatica).
1370
1371The southern beeches belong to a different but related genus,
1372Nothofagus. They are found in Australia, New Zealand, New Guinea, New
51caa79e 1373Caledonia and South America.
4363636d 1374
4363636d
DG
1375=head2 v5.8.5-RC1 - wikipedia, "Pedunculate Oak" (abridged)
1376
38183302 1377L<Announced on 2004-07-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/ca6ce4a7ed9f219c?pli=1>
2831a86c 1378
4363636d
DG
1379The Pedunculate Oak is called the Common Oak in Britain, and is also
1380often called the English Oak in other English speaking countries It is a
1381large deciduous tree to 25-35m tall (exceptionally to 40m), with lobed
1382and sessile (stalk-less) leaves. Flowering takes place in early to mid
1383spring, and their fruit, called "acorns", ripen by autumn of the same
1384year. The acorns are pedunculate (having a peduncle or acorn-stalk) and
1385may occur singly, or several acorns may occur on a stalk.
1386
1387It forms a long-lived tree, with a large widespreading head of rugged
1388branches. While it may naturally live to an age of a few centuries, many
1389of the oldest trees are pollarded or coppiced, both pruning techniques
1390that extend the tree's potential lifespan, if not its health.
1391
1392Within its native range it is valued for its importance to insects and
1393other wildlife. Numerous insects live on the leaves, buds, and in the
1394acorns. The acorns form a valuable food resource for several small
1395mammals and some birds, notably Jays Garrulus glandarius.
1396
1397It is planted for forestry, and produces a long-lasting and durable
51caa79e 1398heartwood, much in demand for interior and furniture work.
4363636d 1399
4363636d
DG
1400=head2 v5.8.4 - T. S. Eliot, "The Old Gumbie Cat"
1401
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1402L<Announced on 2004-04-22 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/c7333acf03ef4015>
1403
4363636d
DG
1404 I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots;
1405 The curtain-cord she likes to wind, and tie it into sailor-knots.
1406 She sits upon the window-sill, or anything that's smooth and flat:
1407 She sits and sits and sits and sits -- and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat!
1408
1409 But when the day's hustle and bustle is done,
1410 Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun.
1411 She thinks that the cockroaches just need employment
1412 To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment.
1413 So she's formed, from that a lot of disorderly louts,
1414 A troop of well-disciplined helpful boy-scouts,
1415 With a purpose in life and a good deed to do--
1416 And she's even created a Beetles' Tattoo.
1417
4363636d
DG
1418 So for Old Gumbie Cats let us now give three cheers --
1419 On whom well-ordered households depend, it appears.
1420
4363636d
DG
1421
1422=head2 v5.8.4-RC2 - T. S. Eliot, "Macavity: The Mystery Cat"
1423
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1424L<Announced on 2004-04-16 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/84f6fdd73cc56a1b>
1425
4363636d
DG
1426 Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw --
1427 For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
1428 He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
1429 For when they reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
1430
1431 Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
1432 He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
1433 His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
1434 And when you reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
1435 You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air --
1436 But I tell you once and once again, /Macavity's not there/!
1437
4363636d
DG
1438=head2 v5.8.4-RC1 - T. S. Eliot, "Skimbleshanks: The Railway Cat"
1439
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ZA
1440L<Announced on 2004-04-05 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e500353440769ebf>
1441
4363636d
DG
1442 There's a whisper down the line at 11.39
1443 When the Night Mail's ready to depart,
1444 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble has he gone to hunt the thimble?
1445 We must find him of the train can't start.'
1446 All the guards and all the porters and the stationmaster's daughters
1447 They are searching high and low,
1448 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble for unless he's very nimble
1449 Then the Night Mail just can't go'
1450 At 11.42 then the signal's overdue
1451 And the passengers are frantic to a man--
1452 Then Skimble will appear and he'll saunter to the rear:
1453 He's been busy in the luggage van!
1454 He gives one flash of his glass-green eyes
1455 And the the signal goes 'All Clear!'
1456 And we're off at last of the northern part
1457 Of the Northern Hemisphere!
1458
4363636d
DG
1459=head2 v5.8.3 - Arthur William Edgar O'Shaugnessy, "Ode"
1460
2831a86c
ZA
1461L<Announced on 2004-01-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/968fb8d71e23af69>
1462
51caa79e
DG
1463 We are the music makers,
1464 And we are the dreamers of dreams,
1465 Wandering by lonely sea-breakers,
1466 And sitting by desolate streams; --
1467 World-losers and world-forsakers,
1468 On whom the pale moon gleams:
1469 Yet we are the movers and shakers
1470 Of the world for ever, it seems.
4363636d 1471
4363636d
DG
1472=head2 v5.8.3-RC1 - Irving Berlin, "Let's Face the Music and Dance"
1473
2831a86c
ZA
1474L<Announced on 2004-01-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/5ced50bebcd11c96>
1475
4363636d
DG
1476 There may be trouble ahead,
1477 But while there's music and moonlight,
1478 And love and romance,
1479 Let's face the music and dance.
1480
1481 Before the fiddlers have fled,
1482 Before they ask us to pay the bill,
1483 And while we still have that chance,
1484 Let's face the music and dance.
1485
1486 Soon, we'll be without the moon,
1487 Humming a different tune, and then,
1488
1489 There may be teardrops to shed,
1490 So while there's music and moonlight,
1491 And love and romance,
1492 Let's face the music and dance.
1493
4363636d
DG
1494=head2 v5.8.2 - Walt Whitman, "Passage to India"
1495
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1496L<Announced on 2003-11-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/4714574f93967673>
1497
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DG
1498 Passage, immediate passage! the blood burns in my veins!
1499 Away O soul! hoist instantly the anchor!
1500 Cut the hawsers - hall out - shake out every sail!
1501 Have we not stood here like trees in the ground long enough?
1502 Have we not grovel'd here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes?
1503 Have we not darken'd and dazed ourselves with books long enough?
1504
4363636d
DG
1505 Sail forth - steer for the deep waters only,
1506 Reckless O soul, exploring, I with the and thou with me,
1507 For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go,
1508 And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all.
1509
1510 O my brave soul!
1511 O farther farther sail!
1512 O daring job, but safe! are they not all the seas of God?
1513 O farther, farther, farther sail!
1514
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DG
1515=head2 v5.8.2-RC2 - Eric Idle/John Du Prez, "Accountancy Shanty"
1516
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ZA
1517L<Announced on 2003-11-03 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/7669de5804b792f6>
1518
4363636d
DG
1519 It's fun to charter an accountant
1520 And sail the wide accountan-cy,
1521 To find, explore the funds offshore
1522 And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy.
1523
4363636d
DG
1524=head2 v5.8.2-RC1 - Edward Lear, "The Jumblies"
1525
2831a86c
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1526L<Announced on 2003-10-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83680ef3bbf7378d>
1527
4363636d
DG
1528 They went to sea in a Sieve, they did,
1529 In a Sieve they went to sea:
1530 In spite of all their friends could say,
1531 On a winter's morn, on a stormy day,
1532 In a Sieve they went to sea!
1533 And when the Sieve turned round and round,
1534 And everyone cried, "You'll all be drowned!"
1535 They cried aloud, "Our Sieve ain't big,
1536 But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig!
1537 In a Sieve we'll go to sea!"
1538
1539 Far and few, far and few,
1540 Are the lands where the Jumblies live;
1541 Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
1542 And they went to sea in a Sieve.
1543
2831a86c
ZA
1544=head2 v5.8.1 - epigraph same as v5.7.1
1545
1546L<Announced on 2003-09-25 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82678.html>
1547
1548=head2 v5.8.1-RC5 - Terry Pratchett, "Lords and Ladies"
1549
1550L<Announced on 2003-09-22 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82476.html>
1551
1552No matter what she did with her hair it took about
1553three minutes for it to tangle itself up again,
1554like a garden hosepipe in a shed [Footnote: Which,
1555no matter how carefully coiled, will always uncoil
1556overnight and tie the lawnmower to the bicycles].
1557
1558=head2 v5.8.1-RC4 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1559
1560L<Announced on 2003-08-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/08/msg79184.html>
1561
1562Grand Viziers were /always/ scheming megalomaniacs.
1563It was probably in the job description: "Are you a
1564devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good,
1565then you can be my most trusted minister."
1566
1567=head2 v5.8.1-RC3 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1568
1569L<Announced on 2003-07-30 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg79048.html>
1570
1571Lord Hong had a mind like a knife, although possibly
1572a knife with a curved blade.
1573
1574=head2 v5.8.1-RC2 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1575
1576L<Announced on 2003-07-11 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78102.html>
1577
1578Many an ancient lord's last words had been, "You can't kill
1579me because I've got magic aaargh."
1580
1581=head2 v5.8.1-RC1 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1582
1583L<Announced on 2003-07-10 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78009.html>
1584
1585Cohen was familiar with city gates. He'd broken down a number
1586in his time, by battering ram, siege gun, and on one occasion
1587with his head.
1588
1589But the gates of Hunghung were pretty damn good gates. They
1590weren't like the gates of Ankh-Morpork, which were usually wide
1591open to attract the spending customer and whose concession to
1592defense was the sign "Thank You For Not Attacking Our City.
1593Bonum Diem." These things were big and made of metal and there
1594was a guardhouse and a squad of unhelpful men in black armor.
1595
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1596=head2 v5.8.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
1597
1598L<Announced on 2002-07-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63720.html>
1599
1600There was the faint sound of footsteps.
1601"Chap with a whip got as far as the big sharp spikes last week,"
1602said the low priest.
1603There was a sound like the flushing of a very old dry lavatory.
1604The footsteps stopped. The High Priest smiled to himself.
1605"Right," he said. "See your two pebbles and raise you two pebbles."
1606The low priest threw down his cards. "Double Onion," he said.
1607The High Priest looked down suspiciously.
1608The low priest consulted a scrap of paper. "That's three hundred
1609thousand, nine hundred and sixty-four pebbles you owe me," he said.
1610There was the sound of footsteps. The priests exchanged glances.
1611"Haven't had one for poisoned-dart alley for quite some time,"
1612said the High Priest.
1613"Five says he makes it", said the low priest. "You're on."
1614There was a faint clatter of metal points on stone.
1615"It's a shame to take your pebbles."
1616There were footsteps again.
1617
1618=head2 v5.8.0-RC3 - no epigraph
1619
1620L<Announced on 2002-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63234.html>
1621
1622=head2 v5.8.0-RC2 - no epigraph
1623
1624L<Announced on 2002-06-21 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg62013.html>
1625
1626=head2 v5.8.0-RC1 - no epigraph
1627
1628L<Announced on 2002-06-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg60317.html>
1629
1630=head2 v5.7.3 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
1631
1632L<Announced on 2002-03-04 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/03/msg53652.html>
1633
1634Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong.
1635No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always
1636got there first, and is waiting for it.
1637
1638=head2 v5.7.2 - Terry Pratchett, "Small Gods"
1639
1640L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/07/msg40370.html>
1641
1642His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools --
1643the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans -- and summed up
1644all three of them in his famous phrase, "You can't trust any
1645bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing
1646you can do about it, so let's have a drink."
1647
1648=head2 v5.7.1 - Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic"
1649
1650L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33851.html>
4363636d 1651
4363636d
DG
1652"What happens next?" asked Twoflower.
1653
1654Hrun screwed a finger in his ear and inspected it absently.
1655
1656"Oh,", he said, "I expect in a minute the door will be
1657flung back and I'll be dragged off to some sort of temple
1658arena where I'll fight maybe a couple of giant spiders
1659and an eight-foot slave from the jungles of Klatch and then
1660I'll rescue some kind of a princess from the altar and then
1661I'll kill off a few guards or whatever and then this girl
1662will show me the secret passage out of the place and we'll
1663liberate a couple of horses and escape with the treasure."
1664Hrun leaned his head back on his hands and looked at the
1665ceiling, whistling tunelessly.
1666
1667"All that?" said Twoflower.
1668
1669"Usually."
1670
c7bed260
Z
1671=head2 v5.7.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Moving Pictures"
1672
1673L<Announced on 2000-09-02 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/09/msg17730.html>
1674
1675The Librarian had seen many weird things in his time,
1676but that had to be the 57th strangest.
1677[footnote: he had a tidy mind]
1678
1679=head2 v5.6.2 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
1680
1681L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/deb8cb9ad918716f>
1682
1683When great or unexpected events fall out upon the stage of this
1684sublunary word--the mind of man, which is an inquisitive kind of
1685a substance, naturally takes a flight, behind the scenes, to see
1686what is the cause and first spring of them--The search was not
1687long in this instance.
1688
1689=head2 v5.6.2-RC1 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
1690
1691L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e3d4acc7a8dd3ce5>
1692
1693"Pray, my dear", quoth my mother, "have you not forgot to wind up the clock?"
1694
2831a86c 1695=head2 v5.6.1 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", Riddles in the Dark
4363636d 1696
2831a86c 1697L<Announced on 2001-04-08 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33823.html>
4363636d 1698
2831a86c
ZA
1699`What have I got in my pocket?' he said aloud. He was talking to
1700himself, but Gollum thought it was a riddle, and he was frightfully
1701upset.
4363636d 1702
2831a86c
ZA
1703`Not fair! not fair!' he hissed. `It isn't fair, my precious, is it,
1704to ask us what it's got in its nassty little pocketses?'
4363636d 1705
2831a86c
ZA
1706Bilbo seeing what had happened and having nothing better to ask
1707stuck to his question, `What have I got in my pocket?' he said
1708louder.
4363636d 1709
2831a86c
ZA
1710`S-s-s-s-s,' hissed Gollum. `It must give us three guesseses,
1711my precious, three guesseses.'
4363636d 1712
2831a86c 1713=head2 v5.6.1-foolish - no epigraph
4363636d 1714
2831a86c 1715L<Announced on 2001-08-04 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33421.html>
3e340399 1716
2831a86c 1717=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL3 - I can't find the announcement
4363636d 1718
a4b0381d
MS
1719No announcement available.
1720
2831a86c 1721=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL2 - no epigraph
4363636d 1722
2831a86c 1723L<Announced on 2001-01-31 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/01/msg29934.html>
4363636d 1724
2831a86c 1725=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL1 - no epigraph
4363636d 1726
2831a86c 1727L<Announced on 2000-12-18 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/12/msg27738.html>
4363636d 1728
2831a86c 1729=head2 v5.6.0 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", The Last Stage
a4b0381d 1730
2831a86c
ZA
1731L<Announced on 2000-03-23 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10341.html>
1732
1733 The dragon is withered,
1734 His bones are now crumbled;
1735 His armour is shivered,
1736 His splendour is humbled!
1737 Though sword shall be rusted,
1738 And throne and crown perish
1739 With strength that men trusted
1740 And wealth that they cherish,
1741 Here grass is still growing,
1742 And leaves are a yet swinging,
1743 The white water flowing,
1744 And elves are yet singing
1745 Come! Tra-la-la-lally!
1746 Come back to the valley.
1747
2831a86c
ZA
1748=head2 v5.6.0-RC3 - no epigraph
1749
1750L<Announced on 2000-03-22 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10140.html>
4363636d 1751
c7bed260
Z
1752=head2 v5.005_05-RC1 - no epigraph
1753
1754L<Announced on 2009-02-16 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/02/msg144227.html>
1755
1756=head2 v5.005_04 - no epigraph
1757
1758L<Announced on 2004-03-01 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6c240ad0b189cb47>
1759
1760=head2 v5.005_04-RC2 - Rudyard Kipling, "The Jungle Book"
1761
1762L<Announced on 2004-02-19 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83e5421124a7b49d>
1763
1764The monkeys called the place their city, and pretended to despise
1765the Jungle-People because they lived in the forest. And yet they
1766never knew what the buildings were made for nor how to use
1767them. They would sit in circles on the hall of the king's council
1768chamber, and scratch for fleas and pretend to be men; or they would
1769run in and out of the roofless houses and collect pieces of plaster
1770and old bricks in a corner, and forget where they had hidden them,
1771and fight and cry in scuffling crowds, and then break off to play up
1772and down the terraces of the king's garden, where they would shake
1773the rose trees and the oranges in sport to see the fruit and flowers
1774fall.
1775
1776=head2 v5.005_04-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1777
1778L<Announced on 2004-02-05 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6aaeb6ec699bd116>
1779
1780Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had
1781plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to wonder what was
1782going to happen next. First, she tried to look down and make out what
1783she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything; then she looked
1784at the sides of the well, and noticed that they were filled with
1785cupboards and book-shelves; here and there she saw maps and pictures
1786hung upon pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves as she
1787passed; it was labelled 'ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great
1788disappointment it was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear
1789of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as
1790she fell past it.
1791
1792=head2 v1.0_16 - Johan Vromans, extemporarily
1793
1794L<Announced on 2003-12-18 by Richard Clamp|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9281dc6194d15940>
1795
4363636d
DG
1796=head1 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
1797
0e6b8110 1798This document was originally compiled based on a list of epigraphs
4363636d
DG
1799on L<Perl Monks|http://perlmonks.org> titled
1800L<Recent Perl Release Announcement|http://perlmonks.org/?node_id=372406>
1801by ysth.
1802
1803=cut
3e340399 1804
4363636d 1805# vim:tw=72: