This is a live mirror of the Perl 5 development currently hosted at https://github.com/perl/perl5
Merge branch 'bingos/release-5.15.7' into blead
[perl5.git] / Porting / epigraphs.pod
CommitLineData
f1e17f6f
AB
1=encoding utf8
2
4363636d
DG
3=head1 NAME
4
0e6b8110 5perlepigraphs - list of Perl release epigraphs
4363636d
DG
6
7=head1 DESCRIPTION
8
0e6b8110 9Many Perl release announcements included an I<epigraph>, a short excerpt
2831a86c
ZA
10from a literary or other creative work, chosen by the pumpking or release
11manager. This file assembles the known list of epigraph for posterity,
12and also links to the release announcements in mailing list archives.
4363636d 13
0e6b8110
DG
14I<Note>: these have also been referred to as <epigrams>, but the
15definition of I<epigraph> is closer to the way they have been used.
16Consult your favorite dictionary for details.
17
18=head1 EPIGRAPHS
4363636d 19
b0d358f0
DR
20=head2 v5.15.6 - Ursula K. Leguin, A Wizard of Earthsea
21
489db6ed
DR
22L<Announced on 2011-12-20 by Dave
23Rolsky|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/12/msg180962.html>
b0d358f0
DR
24
25Ged had thought that as the prentice of a great mage he would enter at once
26into the mystery and mastery of power. He would understand the language of the
27beasts and the speech of the leaves of the forest, he thought, and sway the
28winds with his word, and learn to change himself into any shape he
29wished. Maybe he and his master would run together as stags, or fly to Re Albi
30over the mountain on the wings of eagles.
31
32But it was not so at all. They wandered, first down into the Vale and then
33gradually south and westward around the mountain, given lodging in little
34villages or spending the night out in the wilderness, like poor
35journeyman-sorcerers, or tinkers, or beggars. They entered no mysterious
36domain. Nothing happened. The mage's oaken staff that Ged had watched at first
37with eager dread was nothing but a stout staff to walk with. Three days went
38by and four days went by and still Ogion had not spoken a single charm in
39Ged's hearing, and had not taught him a single name or rune or spell.
40
d0fc7727
SH
41=head2 v5.15.5 - Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman
42
43L<Announced on 2011-11-20 by Steve
44Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/11/msg179588.html>
45
46This day - is a day of the greatest solemnity! Spain has a king. He has
47been found. I am that king. Only this very day did I learn of it. I
48confess, it came to me suddenly in a flash of lightning. I don't understand
49how I could have thought and imagined that I was a titular councillor. How
50could such a wild notion enter my head? It's a good thing no one thought of
51putting me in an insane asylum. Now everything is laid open before me. Now
52I see everything as on the palm of my hand. And before, I don't understand,
53before everything around me was in some sort of fog. And all this happens, I
54think, because people imagine that the human brain is in the head. Not at
55all: it is brought by a wind from the direction of the Caspian Sea. First
56off, I announced to Mavra who I am. When she heard that the king of Spain
57was standing before her, she clasped her hands and nearly died of fright.
58The stupid woman had never seen a king of Spain before. However, I
59endeavoured to calm her down and assured her in gracious words of my
60benevolence and that I was not at all angry that she sometimes polished my
61boots poorly. They're benighted folk. It's impossible to tell them about
62lofty matters. She got frightened because she's convinced that all kings of
63Spain are like Philip II. But I explained to her that there was no
64resemblance between me and Philip II, and that I didn't have a single
65Capuchin . . . I didn't go to the office . . . To hell with it! No friends,
66you won't lure me there now; I'm not going to copy your vile papers!
67
68 -- Nikolai Gogol, The Diary of a Madman,
69 trans. Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky
70
1542e678
FR
71=head2 v5.15.4 - Steve Jobs
72
73L<Announced on 2011-10-20 by Florian
74Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/10/msg178412.html>
75
76A lot of people in our industry haven't had very diverse experiences. So they
77don't have enough dots to connect, and they end up with very linear solutions
78without a broad perspective on the problem. The broader one's understanding of
79the human experience, the better design we will have.
80
21677d22
FR
81=head2 v5.14.2 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> | http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
82
83L<Announced on 2011-09-26 by Florian
84Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177618.html>
85
86
87It's not so much that people don't value the programs after they have them--they
88do value them. But they're not the sort of thing that would ever catch on if
89they had to overcome the marketing barrier. (I don't yet know if perl will
90catch on at all--I'm worried enough about it that I specifically included an
91awk-to-perl translator just to help it catch on.) Maybe it's all just an
92inferiority complex. Or maybe I don't like to be mercenary.
93
94So I guess I'd say that the reason some software comes free is that the
95mechanism for selling it is missing, either from the work environment, or from
96the heart of the programmer.
97
98
607b15aa
SL
99=head2 v5.15.3 - Oscar Wilde, All Art is Quite Useless
100
ca420de3
SL
101L<Announced on 2011-09-20 by Stevan
102Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177427.html>
103
607b15aa
SL
104 All art is at once surface and symbol. Those who go beneath
105 the surface do so at their peril. Those who read the symbol
106 do so at their peril.
107
108 It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors.
109 Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the
110 work is new, complex, and vital. When critics disagree, the
111 artist is in accord with himself.
112
113 We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as
114 he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless
115 thing is that one admires it intensely.
116
117 All art is quite useless.
118
119 -- Oscar Wilde, From the preface to The Picture of Dorian Gray
120
121
bfb65171
RS
122=head2 v5.15.2 - Rainer Maria Rilke, The Third Duina Elegy
123
124L<Announced on 2011-08-20 by Ricardo
125Signes|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-08/msg00694.html>
126
127True, it is strange to live no more on earth,
128no longer follow the folkways scarecely learned;
129not to give roses and other especially auspicious
130things the significance of a human future;
131to be no more what one was in infinitely anxious hands,
132and to put aside even one's name, like a broken plaything.
133Strange, to wish wishes no longer. Strange, to see
134all that was related fluttering so loosely in space.
135And being dead is hard, full of catching-up,
136so that finally one feels a little eternity.–
137But the living all make the mistake of too sharp discrimination.
138Often angels (it's said) don't know if they move
139among the quick or the dead. The eternal current
140hurtles all ages along with it forever
141through both realms and drowns their voices in both.
142
143 -- Rainer Maria Rilke, Duino, The First Elegy
144 trans., C. F. MacIntyre
145
1889cb12
Z
146=head2 v5.15.1 - Greg Egan, "Permutation City"
147
2ccefb8a 148L<Announced on 2011-07-20 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/07/msg175014.html>
1889cb12
Z
149
150Carter held out a hand towards the middle of the room. `See that
151fountain?' A ten-metre-wide marble wedding cake, topped with a
152winged cherub wrestling a serpent, duly appeared. Water cascaded
153down from a gushing wound in the cherub's neck. Carter said, `It's
154being computed by redundancies in the sketch of the city. I can
155extract the results, because I know exactly where to look for them --
156but nobody else would have a hope in hell of picking them out.'
157
158Peer walked up to the fountain. Even as he approached, he noticed
159that the spray was intangible; when he dipped his hand in the water
160around the base he felt nothing, and the motion he made with his
161fingers left the foaming surface unchanged. They were spying on
162the calculations, not interacting with them; the fountain was a
163closed system.
164
165Carter said, `In your case, of course, nobody will need to know
166the results. Except you -- and you'll know them because you'll
167/be/ them.'
168
452ead5e
DG
169=head2 v5.15.0 - Neil Gaiman, "The Graveyard Book"
170
171L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173748.html>
172
173 If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all
174 you will have gained.
175
b3c5102d
LB
176=head2 v5.12.4 - William Schwenck Gilbert, "Trial By Jury"
177
178L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173725.html>
179
180You cannot eat breakfast all day,
181Nor is it the act of a sinner,
182When breakfast is taken away,
183To turn his attention to dinner;
184And it's not in the range of belief,
185To look upon him as a glutton,
186Who, when he is tired of beef,
187Determines to tackle the mutton.
188Ah! But this I am willing to say,
189If it will appease her sorrow,
190I'll marry this lady today,
191And I'll marry the other tomorrow!
192
901b3fdb
LB
193=head2 v5.14.1 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> | http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
194
195L<Announced on 2011-06-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173650.html>
196
197At this point I'm no longer working for a company that makes me sign
198my life away, but by now I'm in the habit. Besides, I still harbor
199the deep-down suspicion that nobody would pay money for what I write,
200since most of it just helps you do something better that you could
201already do some other way. How much money would you personally pay
202to upgrade from readnews to rn? How much money would you pay for
203the patch program? As for warp, it's a mere game. And anything you
204can do with perl you can eventually do with an amazing and totally
205unreadable conglomeration of awk, sed, sh and C.
206
207=head2 v5.12.4-RC2 - James Russell Lowell, "Eleanor makes macaroons"
208
209L<Announced on 2011-06-15 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173609.html>
210
211Now for sugar, -- nay, our plan
212Tolerates no work of man.
213Hurry, then, ye golden bees;
214Fetch your clearest honey, please,
215Garnered on a Yorkshire moor,
216While the last larks sing and soar,
217From the heather-blossoms sweet
218Where sea-breeze and sunshine meet,
219And the Augusts mask as Junes, --
220Eleanor makes macaroons!
221
7fdfa5b9
LB
222=head2 v5.12.4-RC1 - Ogden Nash, "The Clean Plater"
223
224L<Announced on 2011-06-08 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173352.html>
225
226Pheasant is pleasant, of course,
227And terrapin, too, is tasty,
228Lobster I freely endorse,
229In pate or patty or pasty.
230But there's nothing the matter with butter,
231And nothing the matter with jam,
232And the warmest greetings I utter
233To the ham and the yam and the clam.
234For they're food,
235All food,
236And I think very fondly of food.
237Through I'm broody at times
238When bothered by rhymes,
239I brood
240On food.
241
8b55b028
ZA
242=head2 v5.14.0 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> | http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
243
244L<Announced on 2011-05-14 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172326.html>
245
246At the start of any project, I'm programming primarily to please
247myself. (The two chief virtues in a programmer are laziness and
248impatience.) After a while somebody looks over my shoulder and says,
249"That's neat. It'd be neater if it did such-and-so." So the thing
250gets neater. Pretty soon (a year or two) I have an rn, a warp, a patch,
251or a perl. One of these years I'll have a metaconfig.
252
253I then say to myself, "I don't want my life's work to die when this
254computer is scrapped, so I should let some other people use this. If I
255ask my company to sell this, it'll never see the light of day, and nobody
256would pay much for it anyway. If I sell it myself, I'll be in trouble with
257my company, to whom I signed my life away when I was hired. If I give it
258away, I can pretend it was worthless in the first place, so my company
259won't care. In any event, it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission."
260
261So a freely distributable program is born.
262
263=head2 v5.14.0-RC3 - American Airlines Gate Agent, last call
264
265L<Announced on 2011-05-11 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172282.html>
266
267This is the last call for flight 1697 with service to Chicago and
268continuing service to San Francisco. All passengers should already be
269aboard. If you aren't aboard at this time, you will be denied boarding
270and your bags will be offloaded.
271
272=head2 v5.14.0-RC2 - Greg Grandin, Fordlandia, "the Rise and Fall of Henry Ford's Forgotten Jungle City"
273
274L<Announced on 2011-05-04 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg171879.html>
275
276Over the course of nearly two decades, Ford would spend tens of millions
277of dollars founding not one but, after the plantation was defastated
278by leaf blight, two American towns, complete with central squares,
279sidewalks, indoor plumbing, hospitals, manicured lawns, movie theaters,
280swimming pools, golf courses, and, of course, Model Ts and As rolling
281down their paved streets.
282
283Back in America, newspapers kept up their drumbeat celebration, only
284obliquely referencing reports that things were not progressing as the
285company had hoped. But there was one note of skepticism. In late 1928,
286the Washington Post ran an editorial that read in its entirety: "Ford will
287govern a rubber plantation in Brazil larger than North Carolina. This is
288the first time he has applied quantity production methods to trouble"
289
290=head2 v5.14.0-RC1 - Bill Bryson, "In a Sunburned Country"
291
292L<Announced on 2011-04-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/04/msg171253.html>
293
294But then Australia is such a difficult country to keep track of. On
295my first visit, some years ago, I passed the time on the long flight
296reading a history of Australian politics in the twentieth century,
297wherein I encountered the startling fact that in 1967 the prime minister,
298Harold Holt, was strolling along a beach in Victoria when he plunged into
299the surf and vanished. No trace of the poor man was ever seen again.
300This seemed doubly astounding to meE<0x2014>first that Australia could
301just I<lose> a prime minister (I mean, come on) and second that news of
302this had never reached me.
303
04496198
FR
304=head2 v5.13.11 - Walt Whitman, L<Leaves of Grass|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leaves_of_Grass>
305
306L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.xray.mpe.mpg.de/mailing-lists/perl5-porters/2011-03/msg00560.html>
307
308 When the full-grown poet came,
309 Out spake pleased Nature (the round impassive globe, with all its
310 shows of day and night,) saying, He is mine;
311 But out spake too the Soul of man, proud, jealous and unreconciled,
312 Nay he is mine alone;
313 --Then the full-grown poet stood between the two, and took each
314 by the hand;
315 And to-day and ever so stands, as blender, uniter, tightly holding hands,
316 Which he will never release until he reconciles the two,
317 And wholly and joyously blends them.
318
c7bed260 319=head2 v5.13.10 - Egill Skalla-Grímsson, L<Egils saga Skalla-Grímssonar|http://www.heimskringla.no/wiki/Egils_saga_Skalla-Gr%C3%ADmssonar>
f1e17f6f 320
fbc70a9e 321L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Ævar Arnfjörð Bjarmason|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/02/msg169340.html>
30688243 322
806849f8
FR
323 Skalat maðr rúnar rísta,
324 nema ráða vel kunni.
325 Þat verðr mörgum manni,
326 es of myrkvan staf villisk.
327 Sák á telgðu talkni
328 tíu launstafi ristna.
329 Þat hefr lauka lindi
f1e17f6f 330 langs ofrtrega fengit.
30688243 331
79af17bd
AB
332=head2 v5.13.9 - John F Kennedy, L<Inaugural Address January 20, 1961|http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/John_F._Kennedy%27s_Inaugural_Address>
333
334L<Announced on 2011-01-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168335.html>
335
336In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been
337granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I
338do not shrink from this responsibility -- I welcome it. I do not believe
339that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other
340generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this
341endeavor will light our country and all who serve it. And the glow from
342that fire can truly light the world.
343
344And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you;
345ask what you can do for your country.
346
347My fellow citizens of the world, ask not what America will do for you,
348but what together we can do for the freedom of man.
349
350Finally, whether you are citizens of America or citizens of the world,
351ask of us here the same high standards of strength and sacrifice which
352we ask of you. With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history
353the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth to lead the land we love,
354asking His blessing and His help, but knowing that here on earth God's
355work must truly be our own.
356
94521723
Z
357=head2 v5.13.8 - Roger Williams, L<"The Fifth Gift"|http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/8/19/21304/8493>
358
2831a86c
ZA
359L<Announced on 2010-12-19 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/12/msg167271.html>
360
94521723
Z
361The aliens called the box a "matter generator," but we'd be more inclined
362to call it a matter duplicator. By connecting switches and potentiometers
363between the copper posts it was possible to make the box mark off two
364cubic rectangular areas of volume. Make a certain contact, and these
365areas would be isolated within perfectly reflective fields. They could
366be expanded or contracted by altering resistances between other posts.
367As I worked out the user interface I built a little control panel for
368the device. It was actually a clever way for the aliens to do things;
369instead of trying to build controls we could use, they built us an
370interface we could attach to controls that made sense to us. It could
371also be automated.
372
373Once you had made the contact that established the shielded volumes,
374if you made another certain contact the contents of the first volume
375were copied to the second. The machine copied metal, plastic, steel,
376and diamond with equal ease. Copies of copies of copies of copies were
377indistinguishable from the originals at any magnification, even using
378techniques like X-ray crystallography.
379
6b1649d0
CBW
380=head2 v5.13.7 - Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski, 'The Matrix'
381
2831a86c
ZA
382L<Announced on 2010-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/11/msg166162.html>
383
6b1649d0
CBW
384[Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one]
385
386Neo: Whoa. Deja vu.
387
388[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
389
390Trinity: What did you just say?
391Neo: Nothing. Just had a little deja vu.
392Trinity: What did you see?
393Cypher: What happened?
394Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just like it.
395Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat?
396Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure.
397Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
398Neo: What is it?
399Trinity: A deja vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when they change something.
400
54cc2c9a
TM
401=head2 v5.13.6 - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore"
402
2831a86c
ZA
403L<Announced on 2010-10-20 by Tatsuhiko Miyagawa|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/10/msg165183.html>
404
54cc2c9a
TM
405The boy called Crow softly rests a hand on my shoulder, and with that
406he storm vanishes.
407
408"From now on -- no matter what -- you've got to be the world's toughest
409fifteen-year-old. That's the only way you're going to survive. And in order
410to do that, you've got to figure out what it means to be tough. You following
411me?"
412
413I keep my eyes closed and don't reply. I just want to sink off into sleep
414like this, his hand on my shoulder. I hear the faint flutter of wings.
415
416"You're going to be the world's toughest fifteen-year-old," Crow whispers
417as I try to fall asleep. Like he was carving the words in a deep blue tattoo
418on my heart.
419
420(Translated from Japanese by Philip Gabriel)
421
f6c56125
SH
422=head2 v5.13.5 - Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, "The Room in the Dragon Volant"
423
2831a86c
ZA
424L<Announced on 2010-09-19 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg164238.html>
425
f6c56125
SH
426Candle in hand I stepped in. I do not know whether the quality of
427air, long undisturbed, is peculiar; to me it has always seemed so, and
428the damp smell of the old masonry hung in this atmosphere. My candle
429faintly lighted the bare stone wall that enclosed the stair, the foot
430of which I could not see. Down I went, and a few turns brought me to
431the stone floor. Here was another door, of the simple, old, oak kind,
432deep sunk in the thickness of the wall. The large end of the key
433fitted this. The lock was stiff; I set the candle down upon the
434stair, and applied both hands; it turned with difficulty, and as it
435revolved, uttered a shriek that alarmed me for my secret.
436
437For some minutes I did not move. In a little time, however, I took
438courage, and opened the door. The night-air floating in puffed out
439the candle. There was a thicket of holly and underwood, as dense as a
440jungle, close about the door. I should have been in pitch-darkness,
441were it not that through the topmost leaves there twinkled, here and
442there, a glimmer of moonshine.
443
444Softly, lest any one should have opened his window at the sound of the
445rusty bolt, I struggled through this till I gained a view of the open
446grounds. Here I found that the brushwood spread a good way up the
447park, uniting with the wood that approached the little temple I have
806849f8 448described.
f6c56125 449
fdea69f9
FR
450=head2 v5.13.4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
451
2831a86c
ZA
452L<Announced on 2010-08-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163150.html>
453
fdea69f9
FR
454`How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought Alice;
455`I might as well be at school at once.' However, she got up, and began to repeat
456it, but her head was so full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what
457she was saying, and the words came very queer indeed:--
458
459 "'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare,
460 "You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair."
461 As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose
462 Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.'
463
464
465`That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' said the Gryphon.
466
467`Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it sounds uncommon
468nonsense.'
469
470Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if
471anything would ever happen in a natural way again.
472
473`I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle.
474
475`She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with the next verse.'
476
477`But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How could he turn them out
478with his nose, you know?'
479
480`It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was dreadfully puzzled by
481the whole thing, and longed to change the subject.
482
0feeb912
DG
483=head2 v5.13.3 - Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, "Good Omens"
484
2831a86c
ZA
485L<Announced on 2010-07-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/07/msg162230.html>
486
0feeb912
DG
487Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading towards
488Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would
489notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth,
490for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his
491sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint.
492
493Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was
494dammned if he wasn't going to finish it in the Bentley as well.
495Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of
496motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage
497Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn't have been able to tell
498that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it
499had ever even been a car.
500
501There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have
502been black, where it wasn't a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but
503this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of
504flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult
505re-entry.
506
507There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the
508metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still
509somhow riding an inch above the road surface this didn't seem to
510make an awful lot of difference to the suspension.
511
512It should have fallen apart miles back.
513
3c55f444
MT
514=head2 v5.13.2 - Iain M Banks, "Use of Weapons"
515
2831a86c
ZA
516L<Announced on 2010-06-22 by Matt S Trout|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/06/msg161112.html>
517
51caa79e
DG
518We deal in the moral equivalent of black holes, where the normal laws -
519the rules of right and wrong that people imagine apply everywhere else
520in the universe - break down; beyond those metaphysical event-horizons,
3c55f444
MT
521there exist ... special circumstances.
522
523=head2 v5.13.1 - Miguel de Unamuno, "The Sepulchre of Don Quixote"
d069c093 524
2831a86c
ZA
525L<Announced on 2010-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160275.html>
526
d069c093
RS
527And if anyone shall come to you and say that he knows how to construct
528bridges and that perhaps a time will come when you will wish to avail
529yourself of his science in order to cross over a river, out with him! Out
530with the engineer! Rivers will be crossed by wading or swimming them, even
531if half the crusaders drown themselves. Let the engineer go off and build
532bridges somewhere else, where they are badly wanted. For those who go in
533quest of the sepulchre, faith is bridge enough.
534
c7bed260
Z
535=head2 v5.13.0 - Jules Verne, "A Journey to the Centre of the Earth"
536
537L<Announced on 2010-04-20 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg159275.html>
538
539The heat still remained at quite a supportable degree. With an
540involuntary shudder, I reflected on what the heat must have been
541when the volcano of Sneffels was pouring its smoke, flames, and
542streams of boiling lava -- all of which must have come up by the
543road we were now following. I could imagine the torrents of hot
544seething stone darting on, bubbling up with accompaniments of
545smoke, steam, and sulphurous stench!
546
547"Only to think of the consequences," I mused, "if the old
548volcano were once more to set to work."
549
550=head2 v5.12.3 - Howard W. Campbell, Jr., "Reflections on Not Participating in Current Events"
551
552L<Announced on 2011-01-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168368.html>
553
554 I saw a huge steam roller,
555 It blotted out the sun.
556 The people all lay down, lay down;
557 They did not try to run.
558 My love and I, we looked amazed
559 Upon the gory mystery.
560 'Lie down, lie down!' the people cried.
561 'The great machine is history!'
562 My love and I, we ran away,
563 The engine did not find us.
564 We ran up to a mountain top,
565 Left history far behind us.
566 Perhaps we should have stayed and died,
567 But somehow we don't think so.
568 We went to see where history'd been,
569 And my, the dead did stink so.
570
571=head2 v5.12.2 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
572
573L<Announced on 2010-09-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg163852.html>
574
575CPUs. Cayce Pollard Units. That's what Damien calls the clothing
576she wears. CPUs are either black, white, or gray, and ideally
577seem to have come into this world without human intervention.
578
579What people take for relentless minimalism is a side effect
580of too much exposure to the reactor-cores of fashion. This
581has resulted in a remorseless paring-down of what she can and
582will wear. She is, literally, allergic to fashion. She can
583only tolerate things that could have been worn, to a general
584lack of comment, during any year between 1945 and 2000. She's a
585design-free zone, a one-woman school of and whose very austerity
586periodically threatens to spawn its own cult.
587
588=head2 v5.12.2-RC1 - William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
589
590L<Announced on 2010-08-31 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163670.html>
591
592The front page opens, familiar as a friend's living room. A frame-grab
593from #48 serves as backdrop, dim and almost monochrome, no characters in
594view. This is one of the sequences that generate comparisons with
595Tarkovsky. She only knows Tarkovsky from stills, really, though she did
596once fall asleep during a screening of The Stalker, going under on an
597endless pan, the camera aimed straight down, in close-up, at a puddle on
598a ruined mosaic floor. But she is not one of those who think that much
599will be gained by analysis of the maker's imagined influences. The cult
600of the footage is rife with subcults, claiming every possible influence.
601Truffaut, Peckinpah -- The Peckinpah people, among the least likely, are
602still waiting for the guns to be drawn.
603
4363636d
DG
604=head2 v5.12.1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
605
2831a86c
ZA
606L<Announced on 2010-05-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160109.html>
607
4363636d
DG
608"Now suppose," chortled Dr. Breed, enjoying himself, "that there were
609many possible ways in which water could crystallize, could freeze.
d517a16a
Z
610Suppose that the sort of ice we skate upon and put into highballs --
611what we might call ice-one -- is only one of several types of ice.
4363636d
DG
612Suppose water always froze as ice-one on Earth because it had never
613had a seed to teach it how to form ice-two, ice-three, ice-four
614...? And suppose," he rapped on his desk with his old hand again,
d517a16a
Z
615"that there were one form, which we will call ice-nine -- a crystal as
616hard as this desk -- with a melting point of, let us say, one-hundred
4363636d
DG
617degrees Fahrenheit, or, better still, a melting point of one-hundred-
618and-thirty degrees."
619
4363636d
DG
620=head2 v5.12.1-RC2 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
621
2831a86c
ZA
622L<Announced on 2010-05-13 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160066.html>
623
4363636d
DG
624San Lorenzo was fifty miles long and twenty miles wide, I learned from
625the supplement to the New York Sunday Times. Its population was four
626hundred, fifty thousand souls, "...all fiercely dedicated to the ideals
627of the Free World."
628
629Its highest point, Mount McCabe, was eleven thousand feet above sea
630level. Its capital was Bolivar, "...a strikingly modern city built on a
631harbor capable of sheltering the entire United States Navy." The principal
632exports were sugar, coffee, bananas, indigo, and handcrafted novelties.
633
2831a86c
ZA
634=head2 v5.12.1-RC1 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"
635
636L<Announced on 2010-05-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg159971.html>
4363636d 637
4363636d
DG
638Which brings me to the Bokononist concept of a wampeter. A wampeter is
639the pivot of a karass. No karass is without a wampeter, Bokonon tells us,
640just as no wheel is without a hub. Anything can be a wampeter: a tree,
641a rock, an animal, an idea, a book, a melody, the Holy Grail. Whatever
642it is, the members of its karass revolve about it in the majestic chaos
643of a spiral nebula. The orbits of the members of a karass about their
644common wampeter are spiritual orbits, naturally. It is souls and not
645bodies that revolve. As Bokonon invites us to sing:
646
647 Around and around and around we spin,
648 With feet of lead and wings of tin . . .
649
4363636d
DG
650=head2 v5.12.0 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
651
2831a86c
ZA
652L<Announced on 2010-04-12 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158820.html>
653
4363636d
DG
654'Please would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, for she was
655not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, 'why
656your cat grins like that?'
657
658'It's a Cheshire cat,' said the Duchess, 'and that's why. Pig!'
659
660She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite
661jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby,
662and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:--
663
664'I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know
665that cats COULD grin.'
666
667'They all can,' said the Duchess; 'and most of 'em do.'
668
4363636d
DG
669=head2 v5.12.0-RC5 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
670
2831a86c
ZA
671L<Announced on 2010-04-09 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158720.html>
672
4363636d
DG
673'Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly; 'some of the words
674have got altered.'
675
676'It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar decidedly, and
677there was silence for some minutes.
678
4363636d
DG
679=head2 v5.12.0-RC4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
680
2831a86c
ZA
681L<Announced on 2010-04-06 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158567.html>
682
4363636d
DG
683'It was much pleasanter at home,' thought poor Alice, 'when one wasn't
684always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and
685rabbits. I almost wish I hadn't gone down that rabbit-hole--and yet--and
686yet--it's rather curious, you know, this sort of life! I do wonder what
687can have happened to me! When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that
688kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one!
689
4363636d
DG
690=head2 v5.12.0-RC3 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
691
2831a86c
ZA
692L<Announced on 2010-04-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg158346.html>
693
4363636d
DG
694At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them,
695called out, 'Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL soon make you
696dry enough!' They all sat down at once, in a large ring, with the Mouse
697in the middle. Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt
698sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon.
699
700'Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, 'are you all ready? This
701is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! "William
702the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was soon submitted
703to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of late much
704accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of
d517a16a 705Mercia and Northumbria --"'
4363636d 706
2831a86c 707=head2 v5.12.0-RC2 - no announcement
4363636d 708
2831a86c 709Available on CPAN since 2010-04-01.
4363636d 710
3e340399 711=head2 v5.12.0-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
4363636d 712
2831a86c
ZA
713L<Announced on 2010-03-29 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg158060.html>
714
4363636d
DG
715So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the
716hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of
717making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and
718picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran
719close by her.
720
721There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice think it so
722VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, 'Oh dear! Oh
723dear! I shall be late!' (when she thought it over afterwards, it
724occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this, but at the time
725it all seemed quite natural); but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH
726OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on,
727Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had
728never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to
729take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the field
730after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large
731rabbit-hole under the hedge.
732
733In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how
734in the world she was to get out again.
735
0e6b8110 736=head2 v5.12.0-RC0 - no epigraph
4363636d 737
2831a86c 738L<Announced on 2020-03-21 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/03/msg157761.html>
4363636d 739
3e340399 740=head2 v5.11.5 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "Christabel"
4363636d 741
2831a86c
ZA
742L<Announced on 2010-02-21 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/02/msg156957.html>
743
4363636d
DG
744 A little child, a limber elf,
745 Singing, dancing to itself,
746 A fairy thing with red round cheeks,
747 That always finds, and never seeks,
748 Makes such a vision to the sight
749 As fills a father's eyes with light;
750 And pleasures flow in so thick and fast
751 Upon his heart, that he at last
752 Must needs express his love's excess
753 With words of unmeant bitterness.
754 Perhaps 'tis pretty to force together
755 Thoughts so all unlike each other;
756 To mutter and mock a broken charm,
757 To dally with wrong that does no harm.
758 Perhaps 'tis tender too and pretty
759 At each wild word to feel within
760 A sweet recoil of love and pity.
761 And what, if in a world of sin
762 (O sorrow and shame should this be true!)
763 Such giddiness of heart and brain
764 Comes seldom save from rage and pain,
765 So talks as it's most used to do.
766
4363636d
DG
767=head2 v5.11.4 - Fyodor Dostoevsky, "Crime and Punishment"
768
2831a86c
ZA
769L<Announced on 2010-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/01/msg155848.html>
770
4363636d
DG
771And you don't suppose that I went into it headlong like a fool? I went
772into it like a wise man, and that was just my destruction. And you
773mustn't suppose that I didn't know, for instance, that if I began to
774question myself whether I had the right to gain power -- I certainly
775hadn't the right -- or that if I asked myself whether a human being is a
776louse it proved that it wasn't so for me, though it might be for a man
777who would go straight to his goal without asking questions.... If I
778worried myself all those days, wondering whether Napoleon would have
779done it or not, I felt clearly of course that I wasn't Napoleon.
780
4363636d
DG
781=head2 v5.11.3 - Mark Twain, "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer"
782
2831a86c
ZA
783L<Announced on 2009-12-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/12/msg154838.html>
784
4363636d 785"Say -- I'm going in a swimming, I am. Don't you wish you could? But of
d517a16a 786course you'd druther work -- wouldn't you? Course you would!"
4363636d
DG
787
788Tom contemplated the boy a bit, and said: "What do you call work?"
789
790"Why ain't that work?"
791
792Tom resumed his whitewashing, and answered carelessly: "Well, maybe it
793is, and maybe it aint. All I know, is, it suits Tom Sawyer."
794
795"Oh come, now, you don't mean to let on that you like it?"
796
797The brush continued to move. "Like it? Well I don't see why I oughtn't
798to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?"
799
800That put the thing in a new light. Ben stopped nibbling his apple. Tom
801swept his brush daintily back and forth -- stepped back to note the effect
802-- added a touch here and there-criticised the effect again -- Ben
803watching every move and getting more and more interested, more and more
804absorbed. Presently he said: "Say, Tom, let me whitewash a little."
805
4363636d
DG
806=head2 v5.11.2 - Michael Marshall Smith, "Only Forward"
807
2831a86c
ZA
808L<Announced on 2009-11-20 by |http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/11/msg153646.html>
809
4363636d
DG
810The streets were pretty quiet, which was nice. They're always quiet here
811at that time: you have to be wearing a black jacket to be out on the
812streets between seven and nine in the evening, and not many people in
813the area have black jackets. It's just one of those things. I currently
814live in Colour Neighbourhood, which is for people who are heavily into
815colour. All the streets and buildings are set for instant colourmatch:
816as you walk down the road they change hue to offset whatever you're
817wearing. When the streets are busy it's kind of intense, and anyone
818prone to epileptic seizures isn't allowed to live in the Neighbourhood,
819however much they're into colour.
820
4363636d
DG
821=head2 v5.11.1 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
822
2831a86c
ZA
823L<Announced on 2009-10-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg152360.html>
824
4363636d
DG
825Milo had been caught red-handed in the act of plundering his countrymen,
826and, as a result, his stock had never been higher. He proved good as his
827word when a rawboned major from Minnesota curled his lip in rebellious
828disavowal and demanded his share of the syndicate Milo kept saying
829everybody owned. Milo met the challenge by writing the words "A Share"
830on the nearest scrap of paper and handing it away with a virtuous disdain
831that won the envy and admiration of almost everyone who knew him. His
832glory was at a peak, and Colonel Cathcart, who knew and admired his
833war record, was astonished by the deferential humility with which Mil
834presented himself at Group Headquarters and made his fantastic appeal
835for more hazardous assignment.
836
4363636d
DG
837=head2 v5.11.0 - Mikhail Bulgakov, "The Master and Margarita"
838
2831a86c
ZA
839L<Announced on 2009-10-02 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/10/msg151376.html>
840
4363636d
DG
841Whispers of an "evil power" were heard in lines at dairy shops, in
842streetcars, stores, arguments, kitchens, suburban and long-distance
843trains, at stations large and small, in dachas and on beaches. Needless
844to say, truly mature and cultured people did not tell these stories
845about an evil power's visit to the capital. In fact, they even made fun
846of them and tried to talk sense into those who told them. Nevertheless,
847facts are facts, as they say, and cannot simply be dismissed without
848explanation: somebody had visited the capital. The charred cinders of
849Griboyedov alone, and many other things besides, confirmed it. Cultured
850people shared the point of view of the investigating team: it was the
851work of a gang of hypnotists and ventriloquists magnificently skilled in
852their art.
853
4363636d
DG
854=head2 v5.10.1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
855
2831a86c
ZA
856L<Announced on 2009-09-23 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150172.html>
857
4363636d
DG
858'Briefly, sir, I am the Permanent Under-Secretary of State, known as
859the Permanent Secretary. Woolley here is your Principal Private
860Secretary. I, too, have a Principal Private Secretary, and he is the
861Principal Private Secretary to the Permanent Secretary. Directly
862responsible to me are ten Deputy Secretaries, eighty-seven Under
863Secretaries and two hundred and nineteen Assistant Secretaries.
864Directly responsible to the Principal Private Secretaries are plain
865Private Secretaries. The Prime Minister will be appointing two
866Parliamentary Under-Secretaries and you will be appointing your own
867Parliamentary Private Secretary.'
868
869'Can they all type?' I joked.
870
871'None of us can type, Minister,' replied Sir Humphrey smoothly. 'Mrs
872McKay types - she is your Secretary.'
873
874I couldn't tell whether or not he was joking. 'What a pity,' I said.
875'We could have opened an agency.'
876
877Sir Humphrey and Bernard laughed. 'Very droll, sir,' said Sir
878Humphrey. 'Most amusing, sir,' said Bernard. Were they genuinely
879amused at my wit, or just being rather patronising? 'I suppose they
880all say that, do they?' I ventured.
881
882Sir Humphrey reassured me on that. 'Certainly not, Minister,' he
883replied. 'Not quite all.'
884
0e6b8110 885=head2 v5.10.1-RC2 - no epigraph
4363636d 886
2831a86c 887L<Announced on 2009-08-18 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg150015.html>
3e340399 888
0e6b8110 889=head2 v5.10.1-RC1 - no epigraph
4363636d 890
2831a86c 891L<Announced on 2009-08-06 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/08/msg149498.html>
3e340399 892
c7bed260 893=head2 v5.10.0 - Laurence Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
4363636d 894
c7bed260
Z
895L<Announced on 2007-12-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/12/msg131636.html>
896
897He would often declare, in speaking his thoughts upon the subject, that
898he did not conceive how the greatest family in England could stand it
899out against an uninterrupted succession of six or seven short
900noses.--And for the contrary reason, he would generally add, That it
901must be one of the greatest problems in civil life, where the same
902number of long and jolly noses, following one another in a direct line,
903did not raise and hoist it up into the best vacancies in the kingdom.
904
905=head2 v5.10.0-RC2 - no epigraph
906
907L<Announced on 2007-11-25 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130978.html>
908
909=head2 v5.10.0-RC1 - no epigraph
910
911L<Announced on 2007-11-17 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/11/msg130653.html>
912
913=head2 v5.9.5 - no announcement
914
915L<Pre-announced on 2007-07-07 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2007/07/msg126358.html>,
916available on CPAN with same date, but never actually announced.
917
918=head2 v5.9.4 - no epigraph
919
920L<Announced on 2006-08-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/08/msg115782.html>
921
922=head2 v5.9.3 - no epigraph
923
924L<Announced on 2006-01-28 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2006/01/msg109086.html>
925
926=head2 v5.9.2 - Thomas Pynchon, "V"
927
928L<Announced on 2005-04-01 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20050401150702.2b4a70d5@grubert.mandrakesoft.com>
929
930This word flip was weird. Every recording date of McClintic's he'd
931gotten into the habit of talking electricity with the audio men and
932technicians of the studio. McClintic once couldn't have cared less
933about electricity, but now it seemed if that was helping him reach a
934bigger audience, some digging, some who would never dig, but all
935paying and those royalties keeping the Triumph in gas and McClintic
936in J. Press suits, then McClintic ought to be grateful to
937electricity, ought maybe to learn a little more about it. So he'd
938picked up some here and there, and one day last summer he got around
939to talking stochastic music and digital computers with one
940technician. Out of the conversation had come Set/Reset, which was
941getting to be a signature for the group. He had found out from this
942sound man about a two-triode circuit called a flip-flop, which when
943it turned on could be one of two ways, depending on which tube was
944conducting and which was cut off: set or reset, flip or flop.
945
946"And that," the man said, "can be yes or no, or one or zero. And
947that is what you might call one of the basic units, or specialized
948`cells' in a big `electronic brain.' "
949
950"Crazy," said McClintic, having lost him back there someplace. But
951one thing that did occur to him was if a computer's brain could go
952flip or flop, why so could a musician's. As long as you were flop,
953everything was cool. But where did the trigger-pulse come from to
954make you flip?
955
956=head2 v5.9.1 - Tom Stoppard, "Arcadia"
957
958L<Announced on 2004-03-16 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/8587d77c565f2d43>
959
960Aren't you supposed to have a pony?
961
962=head2 v5.9.0 - Doris Lessing, "Martha Quest"
963
964L<Announced on 2003-10-27 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/63a8c34385de82a1>
965
966What of October, that ambiguous month
4363636d 967
4363636d
DG
968=head2 v5.8.9 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
969
2831a86c
ZA
970L<Announced on 2008-12-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/12/msg142571.html>
971
4363636d
DG
972Frank and I, unlike the civil servants, were still puzzled that such a
973proposal as the Europass could even be seriously under consideration by
974the FCO. We can both see clearly that it is wonderful ammunition for the
975anti-Europeans. I asked Humphrey if the Foreign Office doesn't realise
976how damaging this would be to the European ideal?
977
978'I'm sure they do, Minister, he said. That's why they support it.'
979
980This was even more puzzling, since I'd always been under the impression
981that the FO is pro-Europe. 'Is it or isn't it?' I asked Humphrey.
982
983'Yes and no,' he replied of course, 'if you'll pardon the
984expression. The Foreign Office is pro-Europe because it is really
985anti-Europe. In fact the Civil Service was united in its desire to make
986sure the Common Market didn't work. That's why we went into it.'
987
988This sounded like a riddle to me. I asked him to explain further. And
989basically his argument was as follows: Britain has had the same foreign
990policy objective for at least the last five hundred years - to create a
991disunited Europe. In that cause we have fought with the Dutch against
992the Spanish, with the Germans against the French, with the French and
993Italians against the Germans, and with the French against the Italians
994and Germans. [The Dutch rebellion against Phillip II of Spain, the
995Napoleonic Wars, the First World War, and the Second World War - Ed.]
996
997In other words, divide and rule. And the Foreign Office can see no
998reason to change when it has worked so well until now.
999
1000I was aware of this, naturally, but I regarded it as ancient history.
1001Humphrey thinks that it is, in fact, current policy. It was necessary
1002for us to break up the EEC, he explained, so we had to get inside. We
1003had previously tried to break it up from the outside, but that didn't
1004work. [A reference to our futile and short-lived involvement in EFTA,
1005the European Free Trade Association, founded in 1960 and which the UK
1006left in 1972 - Ed.] Now that we're in, we are able to make a complete
1007pig's breakfast out of it. We've now set the Germans against the French,
1008the French against the Italians, the Italians against the Dutch... and
1009the Foreign office is terribly happy. It's just like old time.
1010
1011I was staggered by all of this. I thought that the all of us who are
1012publicly pro-European believed in the European ideal. I said this to Sir
1013Humphrey, and he simply chuckled.
1014
1015So I asked him: if we don't believe in the European Ideal, why are we
1016pushing to increase the membership?
1017
1018'Same reason,' came the reply. 'It's just like the United Nations. The
1019more members it has, the more arguments you can stir up, and the more
1020futile and impotent it becomes.'
1021
1022This all strikes me as the most appalling cynicism, and I said so.
1023
1024Sir Humphrey agreed completely. 'Yes Minister. We call it
1025diplomacy. It's what made Britain great, you know.'
1026
4363636d
DG
1027=head2 v5.8.9-RC2 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1028
2831a86c
ZA
1029L<Announced on 2008-12-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg142422.html>
1030
4363636d
DG
1031There was silence in the office. I didn't know what we were going to do
1032about the four hundred new people supervising our economy drive or the
1033four hundred new people for the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office, or
1034anything! I simply sat and waited and hoped that my head would stop
1035thumping and that some idea would be suggested by someone sometime soon.
1036
1037Sir Humphrey obliged. 'Minister... if we were to end the economy drive
1038and close the Bureaucratic Watchdog Office we could issue an immediate
1039press announcement that you had axed eight hundred jobs.' He had
1040obviously thought this out carefully in advance, for at this moment he
1041produced a slim folder from under his arm. 'If you'd like to approve
1042this draft...'
1043
1044I couldn't believe the impertinence of the suggestion. Axed eight
1045hundred jobs? 'But no one was ever doing these jobs,' I pointed out
1046incredulously. 'No one's been appointed yet.'
1047
1048'Even greater economy,' he replied instantly. 'We've saved eight hundred
1049redundancy payments as well.'
1050
1051'But...' I attempted to explain '... that's just phony. It's dishonest,
1052it's juggling with figures, it's pulling the wool over people's eyes.'
1053
1054'A government press release, in fact.' said Humphrey.
1055
4363636d
DG
1056=head2 v5.8.9-RC1 - Right Hon. James Hacker MP, "The Complete Yes Minister: The Diaries of a Cabinet Minister"
1057
2831a86c
ZA
1058L<Announced on 2008-11-10 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2008/11/msg141515.html>
1059
4363636d
DG
1060A jumbo jet touched down, with BURANDAN AIRWAYS written on the side. I
1061was hugely impressed. British Airways are having to pawn their Concordes,
1062and here is this little tiny African state with its own airline, jumbo
1063jets and all.
1064
1065I asked Bernard how many planes Burandan Airways had. 'None,' he said.
1066
1067I told him not to be silly and use his eyes. 'No Minister, it belongs to
1068Freddie Laker,' he said. 'They chartered it last week and repainted it
1069specially.' Apparently most of the Have-Nots (I mean, LDCs) do this - at
1070the opening of the UN General Assembly the runways of Kennedy Airport are
1071jam-packed with phoney flag-carriers. 'In fact,' said Bernard with a sly
1072grin, 'there was one 747 that belonged to nine different African airlines
1073in a month. They called it the mumbo-jumbo.'
1074
1075While we watched nothing much happening on the TV except the mumbo-jumbo
1076taxiing around Prestwick and the Queen looking a bit chilly, Bernard gave
1077me the next day's schedule and explained that I was booked on the night
1078sleeper from King's Cross to Edinburgh because I had to vote in a
1079three-line whip at the House tonight and would have to miss the last
1080plane. Then the commentator, in that special hushed BBC voice used for any
1081occasion with which Royalty is connected, announced reverentially that we
1082were about to catch our first glimpse of President Selim.
1083
1084And out of the plane stepped Charlie. My old friend Charlie Umtali. We
1085were at LSE together. Not Selim Mohammed at all, but Charlie.
1086
1087Bernard asked me if I were sure. Silly question. How could you forget a
1088name like Charlie Umtali?
1089
1090I sent Bernard for Sir Humphrey, who was delighted to hear that we now
1091know something about our official visitor.
1092
1093Bernard's official brief said nothing. Amazing! Amazing how little the FCO
1094has been able to find out. Perhaps they were hoping it would all be on the
1095car radio. All the brief says is that Colonel Selim Mohammed had converted
1096to Islam some years ago, they didn't know his original name, and therefore
1097knew little of his background.
1098
1099I was able to tell Humphrey and Bernard /all/ about his background.
1100Charlie was a red-hot political economist, I informed them. Got the top
1101first. Wiped the floor with everyone.
1102
1103Bernard seemed relieved. 'Well that's all right then.'
1104
1105'Why?' I enquired.
1106
1107'I think Bernard means,' said Sir Humphrey helpfully, 'that he'll know how
1108to behave if he was at an English University. Even if it was the LSE.' I
1109never know whether or not Humphrey is insulting me intentionally.
1110
1111Humphrey was concerned about Charlie's political colour. 'When you said
1112that he was red-hot, were you speaking politically?'
1113
1114In a way I was. 'The thing about Charlie is that you never quite know
1115where you are with him. He's the sort of chap who follows you into a
1116revolving door and comes out in front.'
1117
1118'No deeply held convictions?' asked Sir Humphrey.
1119
1120'No. The only thing Charlie was committed too was Charlie.'
1121
1122'Ah, I see. A politician, Minister.'
1123
4363636d
DG
1124=head2 v5.8.8 - Joe Raposo, "Bein' Green"
1125
2831a86c
ZA
1126L<Announced on 2006-02-01 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/28caf52e41ebe723>
1127
51caa79e
DG
1128 It's not that easy bein' green
1129 Having to spend each day the color of the leaves
4363636d 1130 When I think it could be nicer being red or yellow or gold
51caa79e
DG
1131 Or something much more colorful like that
1132
1133 It's not easy bein' green
4363636d 1134 It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things
51caa79e
DG
1135 And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're
1136 Not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water
1137 Or stars in the sky
1138
1139 But green's the color of Spring
1140 And green can be cool and friendly-like
1141 And green can be big like an ocean
1142 Or important like a mountain
4363636d
DG
1143 Or tall like a tree
1144
1145 When green is all there is to be
1146 It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why?
1147 Wonder I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful
1148 And I think it's what I want to be
1149
4363636d
DG
1150=head2 v5.8.8-RC1 - Cosgrove Hall Productions, "Dangermouse"
1151
2831a86c
ZA
1152L<Announced on 2006-01-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/d231fc554af8cc51>
1153
1154Greenback: And the world is mine, all mine. Muhahahahaha. See to it!
51caa79e 1155
2831a86c 1156Stiletto: Si, Barone. Subito, Barone.
4363636d 1157
4363636d
DG
1158=head2 v5.8.7 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
1159
2831a86c
ZA
1160L<Announced on 2005-05-31 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9a545704a0062f16>
1161
4363636d
DG
1162And now, imagine the triumphant procession: Peter at the head; after him the
1163hunters leading the wolf; and winding up the procession, grandfather and the
1164cat.
1165
1166Grandfather shook his head discontentedly: "Well, and if Peter hadn't caught
51caa79e 1167the wolf? What then?"
4363636d 1168
4363636d
DG
1169=head2 v5.8.7-RC1 - Sergei Prokofiev, "Peter and the Wolf"
1170
2831a86c
ZA
1171L<Announced on 2005-05-20 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2005/05/msg100711.html>
1172
4363636d
DG
1173And now this is how things stood: The cat was sitting on one branch. The
1174bird on another, not too close to the cat. And the wolf walked round and
1175round the tree, looking at them with greedy eyes.
1176
1177In the meantime, Peter, without the slightest fear, stood behind the
1178gate, watching all that was going on. He ran home,got a strong rope and
1179climbed up the high stone wall.
1180
1181One of the branches of the tree, around which the wolf was walking,
1182stretched out over the wall.
1183
1184Grabbing hold of the branch, Peter lightly climbed over on to the tree.
1185Peter said to the bird: "Fly down and circle round the wolf's head, only
1186take care that he doesn't catch you!".
1187
1188The bird almost touched the wolf's head with its wings, while the wolf
1189snapped angrily at him from this side and that.
1190
1191How that bird teased the wolf, how that wolf wanted to catch him! But
51caa79e 1192the bird was clever and the wolf simply couldn't do anything about it.
4363636d 1193
4363636d
DG
1194=head2 v5.8.6 - A. A. Milne, "The House at Pooh Corner"
1195
2831a86c
ZA
1196L<Announced on 2004-11-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=20041128000836.GA304@Bagpuss.unfortu.net>
1197
4363636d 1198"Hallo, Pooh," said Piglet, giving a jump of surprise. "I knew it was
51caa79e 1199you."
4363636d 1200
51caa79e 1201"So did I,", said Pooh. "What are you doing?"
4363636d
DG
1202
1203"I'm planting a haycorn, Pooh, so that it can grow up into an oak-tree,
1204and have lots of haycorns just outside the front door instead of having
51caa79e 1205to walk miles and miles, do you see, Pooh?"
4363636d 1206
51caa79e 1207"Supposing it doesn't?" said Pooh.
4363636d
DG
1208
1209"It will, because Christopher Robin says it will, so that's why I'm
1210planting it."
1211
1212"Well," aid Pooh, "if I plant a honeycomb outside my house, then it will
51caa79e 1213grow up into a beehive."
4363636d 1214
51caa79e 1215Piglet wasn't quite sure about this.
4363636d
DG
1216
1217"Or a /piece/ of a honeycomb," said Pooh, "so as not to waste too much.
1218Only then I might only get a piece of a beehive, and it might be the
51caa79e 1219wrong piece, where the bees were buzzing and not hunnying. Bother"
4363636d 1220
51caa79e 1221Piglet agreed that that would be rather bothering.
4363636d
DG
1222
1223"Besides, Pooh, it's a very difficult thing, planting unless you know
1224how to do it," he said; and he put the acorn in the hole he had made,
51caa79e 1225and covered it up with earth, and jumped on it.
4363636d 1226
4363636d
DG
1227=head2 v5.8.6-RC1 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie the Pooh"
1228
2831a86c
ZA
1229L<Announced on 2004-11-11 by Nicholas Clark|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2004/11/msg95786.html>
1230
4363636d
DG
1231"Hallo!" said Piglet, "whare are /you/ doing?"
1232
1233"Hunting," said Pooh.
1234
1235"Hunting what?"
1236
1237"Tracking something," said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously.
1238
1239"Tracking what?" said Piglet, coming closer.
1240
1241"That's just what I ask myself, I ask myself, What?"
1242
1243"What do you think you'll answer?"
1244
1245"I shall have to wait until I catch up with it," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
1246"Now, look there." He pointed to the ground in front of him. "What do
1247you see there?"
1248
1249"Track," said Piglet. "Paw-marks." He gave a little squeak of
1250excitement. "Oh, Pooh!" Do you think it's a--a--a Woozle?"
1251
4363636d
DG
1252=head2 v5.8.5 - wikipedia, "Yew"
1253
2831a86c
ZA
1254L<Announced on 2004-07-19 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/68340e2e4c39222c>
1255
4363636d
DG
1256Yews are relatively slow growing trees, widely used in landscaping and
1257ornamental horticulture. They have flat, dark-green needles, reddish
1258bark, and bear seeds with red arils, which are eaten by thrushes,
1259waxwings and other birds, dispersing the hard seeds undamaged in their
1260droppings. Yew wood is reddish brown (with white sapwood), and very
1261hard. It was traditionally used to make bows, especially the English
1262longbow.
1263
1264In England, the Common Yew (Taxus baccata, also known as English Yew) is
1265often found in churchyards. It is sometimes suggested that these are
1266placed there as a symbol of long life or trees of death, and some are
1267likely to be over 3,000 years old. It is also suggested that yew trees
1268may have a pre-Christian association with old pagan holy sites, and the
1269Christian church found it expedient to use and take over existing sites.
1270Another explanation is that the poisonous berries and foliage discourage
1271farmers and drovers from letting their animals wander into the burial
1272grounds. The yew tree is a frequent symbol in the Christian poetry of
51caa79e 1273T.S. Eliot, especially his Four Quartets.
4363636d 1274
4363636d
DG
1275=head2 v5.8.5-RC2 - wikipedia, "Beech"
1276
2831a86c
ZA
1277L<Announced on 2004-07-09 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/f92175725af7a5ad>
1278
4363636d
DG
1279Beeches are trees of the Genus Fagus, family Fagaceae, including about
1280ten species in Europe, Asia, and North America. The leaves are entire or
1281sparsely toothed. The fruit is a small, sharply-angled nut, borne in
1282pairs in spiny husks. The beech most commonly grown as an ornamental or
1283shade tree is the European beech (Fagus sylvatica).
1284
1285The southern beeches belong to a different but related genus,
1286Nothofagus. They are found in Australia, New Zealand, New Guinea, New
51caa79e 1287Caledonia and South America.
4363636d 1288
4363636d
DG
1289=head2 v5.8.5-RC1 - wikipedia, "Pedunculate Oak" (abridged)
1290
38183302 1291L<Announced on 2004-07-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/ca6ce4a7ed9f219c?pli=1>
2831a86c 1292
4363636d
DG
1293The Pedunculate Oak is called the Common Oak in Britain, and is also
1294often called the English Oak in other English speaking countries It is a
1295large deciduous tree to 25-35m tall (exceptionally to 40m), with lobed
1296and sessile (stalk-less) leaves. Flowering takes place in early to mid
1297spring, and their fruit, called "acorns", ripen by autumn of the same
1298year. The acorns are pedunculate (having a peduncle or acorn-stalk) and
1299may occur singly, or several acorns may occur on a stalk.
1300
1301It forms a long-lived tree, with a large widespreading head of rugged
1302branches. While it may naturally live to an age of a few centuries, many
1303of the oldest trees are pollarded or coppiced, both pruning techniques
1304that extend the tree's potential lifespan, if not its health.
1305
1306Within its native range it is valued for its importance to insects and
1307other wildlife. Numerous insects live on the leaves, buds, and in the
1308acorns. The acorns form a valuable food resource for several small
1309mammals and some birds, notably Jays Garrulus glandarius.
1310
1311It is planted for forestry, and produces a long-lasting and durable
51caa79e 1312heartwood, much in demand for interior and furniture work.
4363636d 1313
4363636d
DG
1314=head2 v5.8.4 - T. S. Eliot, "The Old Gumbie Cat"
1315
2831a86c
ZA
1316L<Announced on 2004-04-22 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/c7333acf03ef4015>
1317
4363636d
DG
1318 I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots;
1319 The curtain-cord she likes to wind, and tie it into sailor-knots.
1320 She sits upon the window-sill, or anything that's smooth and flat:
1321 She sits and sits and sits and sits -- and that's what makes a Gumbie Cat!
1322
1323 But when the day's hustle and bustle is done,
1324 Then the Gumbie Cat's work is but hardly begun.
1325 She thinks that the cockroaches just need employment
1326 To prevent them from idle and wanton destroyment.
1327 So she's formed, from that a lot of disorderly louts,
1328 A troop of well-disciplined helpful boy-scouts,
1329 With a purpose in life and a good deed to do--
1330 And she's even created a Beetles' Tattoo.
1331
4363636d
DG
1332 So for Old Gumbie Cats let us now give three cheers --
1333 On whom well-ordered households depend, it appears.
1334
4363636d
DG
1335
1336=head2 v5.8.4-RC2 - T. S. Eliot, "Macavity: The Mystery Cat"
1337
2831a86c
ZA
1338L<Announced on 2004-04-16 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/84f6fdd73cc56a1b>
1339
4363636d
DG
1340 Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw --
1341 For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
1342 He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
1343 For when they reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
1344
1345 Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
1346 He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
1347 His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
1348 And when you reach the scene of crime -- /Macavity's not there/!
1349 You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air --
1350 But I tell you once and once again, /Macavity's not there/!
1351
4363636d
DG
1352=head2 v5.8.4-RC1 - T. S. Eliot, "Skimbleshanks: The Railway Cat"
1353
2831a86c
ZA
1354L<Announced on 2004-04-05 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e500353440769ebf>
1355
4363636d
DG
1356 There's a whisper down the line at 11.39
1357 When the Night Mail's ready to depart,
1358 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble has he gone to hunt the thimble?
1359 We must find him of the train can't start.'
1360 All the guards and all the porters and the stationmaster's daughters
1361 They are searching high and low,
1362 Saying 'Skimble where is Skimble for unless he's very nimble
1363 Then the Night Mail just can't go'
1364 At 11.42 then the signal's overdue
1365 And the passengers are frantic to a man--
1366 Then Skimble will appear and he'll saunter to the rear:
1367 He's been busy in the luggage van!
1368 He gives one flash of his glass-green eyes
1369 And the the signal goes 'All Clear!'
1370 And we're off at last of the northern part
1371 Of the Northern Hemisphere!
1372
4363636d
DG
1373=head2 v5.8.3 - Arthur William Edgar O'Shaugnessy, "Ode"
1374
2831a86c
ZA
1375L<Announced on 2004-01-14 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/968fb8d71e23af69>
1376
51caa79e
DG
1377 We are the music makers,
1378 And we are the dreamers of dreams,
1379 Wandering by lonely sea-breakers,
1380 And sitting by desolate streams; --
1381 World-losers and world-forsakers,
1382 On whom the pale moon gleams:
1383 Yet we are the movers and shakers
1384 Of the world for ever, it seems.
4363636d 1385
4363636d
DG
1386=head2 v5.8.3-RC1 - Irving Berlin, "Let's Face the Music and Dance"
1387
2831a86c
ZA
1388L<Announced on 2004-01-07 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/5ced50bebcd11c96>
1389
4363636d
DG
1390 There may be trouble ahead,
1391 But while there's music and moonlight,
1392 And love and romance,
1393 Let's face the music and dance.
1394
1395 Before the fiddlers have fled,
1396 Before they ask us to pay the bill,
1397 And while we still have that chance,
1398 Let's face the music and dance.
1399
1400 Soon, we'll be without the moon,
1401 Humming a different tune, and then,
1402
1403 There may be teardrops to shed,
1404 So while there's music and moonlight,
1405 And love and romance,
1406 Let's face the music and dance.
1407
4363636d
DG
1408=head2 v5.8.2 - Walt Whitman, "Passage to India"
1409
2831a86c
ZA
1410L<Announced on 2003-11-06 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/4714574f93967673>
1411
4363636d
DG
1412 Passage, immediate passage! the blood burns in my veins!
1413 Away O soul! hoist instantly the anchor!
1414 Cut the hawsers - hall out - shake out every sail!
1415 Have we not stood here like trees in the ground long enough?
1416 Have we not grovel'd here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes?
1417 Have we not darken'd and dazed ourselves with books long enough?
1418
4363636d
DG
1419 Sail forth - steer for the deep waters only,
1420 Reckless O soul, exploring, I with the and thou with me,
1421 For we are bound where mariner has not yet dared to go,
1422 And we will risk the ship, ourselves and all.
1423
1424 O my brave soul!
1425 O farther farther sail!
1426 O daring job, but safe! are they not all the seas of God?
1427 O farther, farther, farther sail!
1428
4363636d
DG
1429=head2 v5.8.2-RC2 - Eric Idle/John Du Prez, "Accountancy Shanty"
1430
2831a86c
ZA
1431L<Announced on 2003-11-03 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/7669de5804b792f6>
1432
4363636d
DG
1433 It's fun to charter an accountant
1434 And sail the wide accountan-cy,
1435 To find, explore the funds offshore
1436 And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy.
1437
4363636d
DG
1438=head2 v5.8.2-RC1 - Edward Lear, "The Jumblies"
1439
2831a86c
ZA
1440L<Announced on 2003-10-28 by Nicholas Clark|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83680ef3bbf7378d>
1441
4363636d
DG
1442 They went to sea in a Sieve, they did,
1443 In a Sieve they went to sea:
1444 In spite of all their friends could say,
1445 On a winter's morn, on a stormy day,
1446 In a Sieve they went to sea!
1447 And when the Sieve turned round and round,
1448 And everyone cried, "You'll all be drowned!"
1449 They cried aloud, "Our Sieve ain't big,
1450 But we don't care a button, we don't care a fig!
1451 In a Sieve we'll go to sea!"
1452
1453 Far and few, far and few,
1454 Are the lands where the Jumblies live;
1455 Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
1456 And they went to sea in a Sieve.
1457
2831a86c
ZA
1458=head2 v5.8.1 - epigraph same as v5.7.1
1459
1460L<Announced on 2003-09-25 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82678.html>
1461
1462=head2 v5.8.1-RC5 - Terry Pratchett, "Lords and Ladies"
1463
1464L<Announced on 2003-09-22 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/09/msg82476.html>
1465
1466No matter what she did with her hair it took about
1467three minutes for it to tangle itself up again,
1468like a garden hosepipe in a shed [Footnote: Which,
1469no matter how carefully coiled, will always uncoil
1470overnight and tie the lawnmower to the bicycles].
1471
1472=head2 v5.8.1-RC4 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1473
1474L<Announced on 2003-08-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/08/msg79184.html>
1475
1476Grand Viziers were /always/ scheming megalomaniacs.
1477It was probably in the job description: "Are you a
1478devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good,
1479then you can be my most trusted minister."
1480
1481=head2 v5.8.1-RC3 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1482
1483L<Announced on 2003-07-30 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg79048.html>
1484
1485Lord Hong had a mind like a knife, although possibly
1486a knife with a curved blade.
1487
1488=head2 v5.8.1-RC2 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1489
1490L<Announced on 2003-07-11 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78102.html>
1491
1492Many an ancient lord's last words had been, "You can't kill
1493me because I've got magic aaargh."
1494
1495=head2 v5.8.1-RC1 - Terry Pratchett, "Interesting Times"
1496
1497L<Announced on 2003-07-10 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2003/07/msg78009.html>
1498
1499Cohen was familiar with city gates. He'd broken down a number
1500in his time, by battering ram, siege gun, and on one occasion
1501with his head.
1502
1503But the gates of Hunghung were pretty damn good gates. They
1504weren't like the gates of Ankh-Morpork, which were usually wide
1505open to attract the spending customer and whose concession to
1506defense was the sign "Thank You For Not Attacking Our City.
1507Bonum Diem." These things were big and made of metal and there
1508was a guardhouse and a squad of unhelpful men in black armor.
1509
2831a86c
ZA
1510=head2 v5.8.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
1511
1512L<Announced on 2002-07-18 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63720.html>
1513
1514There was the faint sound of footsteps.
1515"Chap with a whip got as far as the big sharp spikes last week,"
1516said the low priest.
1517There was a sound like the flushing of a very old dry lavatory.
1518The footsteps stopped. The High Priest smiled to himself.
1519"Right," he said. "See your two pebbles and raise you two pebbles."
1520The low priest threw down his cards. "Double Onion," he said.
1521The High Priest looked down suspiciously.
1522The low priest consulted a scrap of paper. "That's three hundred
1523thousand, nine hundred and sixty-four pebbles you owe me," he said.
1524There was the sound of footsteps. The priests exchanged glances.
1525"Haven't had one for poisoned-dart alley for quite some time,"
1526said the High Priest.
1527"Five says he makes it", said the low priest. "You're on."
1528There was a faint clatter of metal points on stone.
1529"It's a shame to take your pebbles."
1530There were footsteps again.
1531
1532=head2 v5.8.0-RC3 - no epigraph
1533
1534L<Announced on 2002-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/07/msg63234.html>
1535
1536=head2 v5.8.0-RC2 - no epigraph
1537
1538L<Announced on 2002-06-21 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg62013.html>
1539
1540=head2 v5.8.0-RC1 - no epigraph
1541
1542L<Announced on 2002-06-01 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/06/msg60317.html>
1543
1544=head2 v5.7.3 - Terry Pratchett, "Reaper Man"
1545
1546L<Announced on 2002-03-04 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2002/03/msg53652.html>
1547
1548Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong.
1549No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always
1550got there first, and is waiting for it.
1551
1552=head2 v5.7.2 - Terry Pratchett, "Small Gods"
1553
1554L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/07/msg40370.html>
1555
1556His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools --
1557the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans -- and summed up
1558all three of them in his famous phrase, "You can't trust any
1559bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing
1560you can do about it, so let's have a drink."
1561
1562=head2 v5.7.1 - Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic"
1563
1564L<Announced on 2001-07-13 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33851.html>
4363636d 1565
4363636d
DG
1566"What happens next?" asked Twoflower.
1567
1568Hrun screwed a finger in his ear and inspected it absently.
1569
1570"Oh,", he said, "I expect in a minute the door will be
1571flung back and I'll be dragged off to some sort of temple
1572arena where I'll fight maybe a couple of giant spiders
1573and an eight-foot slave from the jungles of Klatch and then
1574I'll rescue some kind of a princess from the altar and then
1575I'll kill off a few guards or whatever and then this girl
1576will show me the secret passage out of the place and we'll
1577liberate a couple of horses and escape with the treasure."
1578Hrun leaned his head back on his hands and looked at the
1579ceiling, whistling tunelessly.
1580
1581"All that?" said Twoflower.
1582
1583"Usually."
1584
c7bed260
Z
1585=head2 v5.7.0 - Terry Pratchett, "Moving Pictures"
1586
1587L<Announced on 2000-09-02 by Jarkko Hietaniemi|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/09/msg17730.html>
1588
1589The Librarian had seen many weird things in his time,
1590but that had to be the 57th strangest.
1591[footnote: he had a tidy mind]
1592
1593=head2 v5.6.2 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
1594
1595L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/deb8cb9ad918716f>
1596
1597When great or unexpected events fall out upon the stage of this
1598sublunary word--the mind of man, which is an inquisitive kind of
1599a substance, naturally takes a flight, behind the scenes, to see
1600what is the cause and first spring of them--The search was not
1601long in this instance.
1602
1603=head2 v5.6.2-RC1 - Sterne, "Tristram Shandy"
1604
1605L<Announced on 2003-11-15 by Rafael Garcia-Suarez|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/e3d4acc7a8dd3ce5>
1606
1607"Pray, my dear", quoth my mother, "have you not forgot to wind up the clock?"
1608
2831a86c 1609=head2 v5.6.1 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", Riddles in the Dark
4363636d 1610
2831a86c 1611L<Announced on 2001-04-08 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33823.html>
4363636d 1612
2831a86c
ZA
1613`What have I got in my pocket?' he said aloud. He was talking to
1614himself, but Gollum thought it was a riddle, and he was frightfully
1615upset.
4363636d 1616
2831a86c
ZA
1617`Not fair! not fair!' he hissed. `It isn't fair, my precious, is it,
1618to ask us what it's got in its nassty little pocketses?'
4363636d 1619
2831a86c
ZA
1620Bilbo seeing what had happened and having nothing better to ask
1621stuck to his question, `What have I got in my pocket?' he said
1622louder.
4363636d 1623
2831a86c
ZA
1624`S-s-s-s-s,' hissed Gollum. `It must give us three guesseses,
1625my precious, three guesseses.'
4363636d 1626
2831a86c 1627=head2 v5.6.1-foolish - no epigraph
4363636d 1628
2831a86c 1629L<Announced on 2001-08-04 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/04/msg33421.html>
3e340399 1630
2831a86c 1631=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL3 - I can't find the announcement
4363636d 1632
a4b0381d
MS
1633No announcement available.
1634
2831a86c 1635=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL2 - no epigraph
4363636d 1636
2831a86c 1637L<Announced on 2001-01-31 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2001/01/msg29934.html>
4363636d 1638
2831a86c 1639=head2 v5.6.1-TRIAL1 - no epigraph
4363636d 1640
2831a86c 1641L<Announced on 2000-12-18 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/12/msg27738.html>
4363636d 1642
2831a86c 1643=head2 v5.6.0 - J R R Tolkien, "The Hobbit", The Last Stage
a4b0381d 1644
2831a86c
ZA
1645L<Announced on 2000-03-23 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10341.html>
1646
1647 The dragon is withered,
1648 His bones are now crumbled;
1649 His armour is shivered,
1650 His splendour is humbled!
1651 Though sword shall be rusted,
1652 And throne and crown perish
1653 With strength that men trusted
1654 And wealth that they cherish,
1655 Here grass is still growing,
1656 And leaves are a yet swinging,
1657 The white water flowing,
1658 And elves are yet singing
1659 Come! Tra-la-la-lally!
1660 Come back to the valley.
1661
2831a86c
ZA
1662=head2 v5.6.0-RC3 - no epigraph
1663
1664L<Announced on 2000-03-22 by Gurusamy Sarathy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2000/03/msg10140.html>
4363636d 1665
c7bed260
Z
1666=head2 v5.005_05-RC1 - no epigraph
1667
1668L<Announced on 2009-02-16 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2009/02/msg144227.html>
1669
1670=head2 v5.005_04 - no epigraph
1671
1672L<Announced on 2004-03-01 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6c240ad0b189cb47>
1673
1674=head2 v5.005_04-RC2 - Rudyard Kipling, "The Jungle Book"
1675
1676L<Announced on 2004-02-19 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/83e5421124a7b49d>
1677
1678The monkeys called the place their city, and pretended to despise
1679the Jungle-People because they lived in the forest. And yet they
1680never knew what the buildings were made for nor how to use
1681them. They would sit in circles on the hall of the king's council
1682chamber, and scratch for fleas and pretend to be men; or they would
1683run in and out of the roofless houses and collect pieces of plaster
1684and old bricks in a corner, and forget where they had hidden them,
1685and fight and cry in scuffling crowds, and then break off to play up
1686and down the terraces of the king's garden, where they would shake
1687the rose trees and the oranges in sport to see the fruit and flowers
1688fall.
1689
1690=head2 v5.005_04-RC1 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
1691
1692L<Announced on 2004-02-05 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/6aaeb6ec699bd116>
1693
1694Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had
1695plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to wonder what was
1696going to happen next. First, she tried to look down and make out what
1697she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything; then she looked
1698at the sides of the well, and noticed that they were filled with
1699cupboards and book-shelves; here and there she saw maps and pictures
1700hung upon pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves as she
1701passed; it was labelled 'ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great
1702disappointment it was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear
1703of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as
1704she fell past it.
1705
1706=head2 v1.0_16 - Johan Vromans, extemporarily
1707
1708L<Announced on 2003-12-18 by Richard Clamp|http://groups.google.com/group/perl.perl5.porters/msg/9281dc6194d15940>
1709
4363636d
DG
1710=head1 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
1711
0e6b8110 1712This document was originally compiled based on a list of epigraphs
4363636d
DG
1713on L<Perl Monks|http://perlmonks.org> titled
1714L<Recent Perl Release Announcement|http://perlmonks.org/?node_id=372406>
1715by ysth.
1716
1717=cut
3e340399 1718
4363636d 1719# vim:tw=72: