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Tick the entry for the 5.31.4 release
[perl5.git] / Porting / epigraphs.pod
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3=head1 NAME
4
0e6b8110 5perlepigraphs - list of Perl release epigraphs
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6
7=head1 DESCRIPTION
8
0e6b8110 9Many Perl release announcements included an I<epigraph>, a short excerpt
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10from a literary or other creative work, chosen by the pumpking or release
11manager. This file assembles the known list of epigraph for posterity,
12and also links to the release announcements in mailing list archives.
4363636d 13
de6a5728 14I<Note>: these have also been referred to as I<epigrams>, but the
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15definition of I<epigraph> is closer to the way they have been used.
16Consult your favorite dictionary for details.
17
18=head1 EPIGRAPHS
0ea25355 19
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20=head2 v5.31.2 - Edward Lear, ed. Vivien Noakes, "The Complete Nonsense and Other Verse": The Duck and the Kangaroo
21
22L<Announced on 2019-07-20 by Steve Hay|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/07/msg255639.html>
23
24 Said the Duck to the Kangaroo,
25 'Good gracious! how you hop!
26 Over the fields and the water too,
27 As if you never would stop!
28 My life is a bore in this nasty pond,
29 And I long to go out in the world beyond!
30 I wish I could hop like you!'
31 Said the Duck to the Kangaroo.
32
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33=head2 v5.31.1 - Kurt Vonnegut, _A Man without a Country_
34
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35L<Announced on 2019-06-20 by Karen Etheridge|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/06/msg255243.html>
36
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37On Tuesday, January 20, 2004, I sent Joel Bleifuss, my editor at _In These
38Times_, this fax:
39
40 ON ORANGE ALERT HERE.
41 ECONOMIC TERRORIST ATTACK
42 EXPECTED AT 8 PM EST. KV
43
44Worried, he called, asking what was up. I said I would tell him when I had
45more complete information on the bombs George Bush was set to deliver in his
46State of the Union address.
47
48That night I got a call from my friend, the out-of-print-science-fiction
49writer Kilgore Trout. He asked me, "Did you watch the State of the Union
50address?"
51
52"Yes, and it certainly helped to remember what the great British socialist
53playwright George Bernard Shaw said about this planet."
54
55"Which was?"
56
57"He said, 'I don't know if there are men on the moon, but if there are, they
58must be using the earth as their lunatic asylum.' And he wasn't talking
59about the germs or the elephants. He meant we the people."
60
61"Okay."
62
63"You don't think this is the Lunatic Asylum of the Universe?"
64
65"Kurt, I don't think I expressed an opinion one way of the other."
66
67"We are killing this planet as a life-support system with the poisons from
68all the thermodynamic whoopee we're making with atomic energy and fossil
69fuels, and everybody knows it, and practically nobody cares. This is how
70crazy we are. I think the planet's immune system is trying to get rid of us
71with AIDS and new strains of flu and tuberculosis, and so on. I think the
72planet should get rid of us. We're really awful animals. I mean, that dumb
73Barbra Streisand song, 'People who need people are the luckiest people in
74the world' -- she's talking about cannibals. Lots to eat. Yes, the planet is
75trying to get rid of us, but I think it's too late."
76
77And I said good-bye to my friend, hung up the phone, sat down and wrote this
78epitaph: "The good Earth -- we could have saved it, but we were too damn
79cheap and lazy."
80
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81=head2 v5.31.0 - Fumiko Enchi, Masks
82
de8c1075 83L<Announced on 2019-05-24 by Sawyer X|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/05/msg254886.html>
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84
85 The secrets inside her mind are like flowers in a garden at
86 nighttime, filling the darkness with perfume.
87
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88=head2 v5.30.0 - Morihei Ueshiba
89
de8c1075 90L<Announced on 2019-05-22 by Sawyer X|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/05/msg254844.html>
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91
92 Life is growth. If we stop growing, technically and spiritually, we
93 are as good as dead.
94
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95=head2 v5.30.0-RC2 - Derek Walcott
96
de8c1075 97L<Announced on 2019-05-17 by Sawyer X|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/05/msg254824.html>
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98
99 The truest writers are those who see language not as linguistic process but
100 as a living element.
101
102 -- Derek Walcott
103
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104=head2 v5.30.0-RC1 - Marcel Proust
105
24af9531 106L<Announced on 2019-05-11 by Sawyer X|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/05/msg254748.html>
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107
108 If a little dreaming is dangerous, the cure for it is not to dream
109 less but to dream more, to dream all the time.
110
111 -- Marcel Proust
7316d0a0 112
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113=head2 v5.29.10 - Maya Angelou, Alone
114
8455a262 115L<Announced on 2019-04-20 by Sawyer X|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/04/msg254467.html>
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116
117 Lying, thinking
118 Last night
119 How to find my soul a home
120 Where water is not thirsty
121 And bread loaf is not stone
122 I came up with one thing
123 And I don't believe I'm wrong
124 That nobody,
125 But nobody
126 Can make it out here alone.
127
128 Alone, all alone
129 Nobody, but nobody
130 Can make it out here alone.
131
132 There are some millionaires
133 With money they can't use
134 Their wives run round like banshees
135 Their children sing the blues
136 They've got expensive doctors
137 To cure their hearts of stone.
138 But nobody
139 No, nobody
140 Can make it out here alone.
141
142 Alone, all alone
143 Nobody, but nobody
144 Can make it out here alone.
145
146 Now if you listen closely
147 I'll tell you what I know
148 Storm clouds are gathering
149 The wind is gonna blow
150 The race of man is suffering
151 And I can hear the moan,
152 'Cause nobody,
153 But nobody
154 Can make it out here alone.
155
156 Alone, all alone
157 Nobody, but nobody
158 Can make it out here alone.
159
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160=head2 v5.29.9 - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, The Adventure of the Dancing Men
161
162L<Announced on 2019-03-21 by Zak Elep|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/03/msg253978.html>
163
164 What one man can invent, another can discover.
165
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166=head2 v5.29.8 - Isaac Asimov, Foundation: “Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what's right.”
167
168L<Announced on 2019-02-20 by Atoomic|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/02/msg253750.html>
169
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170=head2 v5.29.7 - Edsger W. Dijkstra: "Programming Considered as a Human Activity", IFIP Congress, New York, 1965.
171
172L<Announced on 2019-01-20 by Abigail|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/01/msg253444.html>
173
174When I became acquainted with the notion of algorithmic languages I
175never challenged the then prevailing notion that the problems of
176language design and implementation were mostly a question of
177compromises: every new convenience for the user had to be paid for
178by the implementation, either in the form of increased trouble
179during translation, or during execution or during both. Well, we
180are most certainly not living in Heaven and I am not going to deny
181the possibility of a conflict between convenience and efficiency,
182but now I do protest when this conflict is presented as a complete
183summing up of the situation. I am of the opinion that is worth-while
184to investigate what extent the needs of Man and Machine go hand in
185hand and to see what techniques we can devise of the benefit of all
186of us. I trust that this investigation will bear fruits and if this
187talk made some of you share this fervent hope, it has achieved its aim.
4363636d 188
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189=head2 v5.29.6 - Rudyard Kipling: "How the Camel Got His Hump"
190
191L<Announced on 2018-12-18 by Abigail|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/12/msg253187.html>
192
193 The Camel's hump is an ugly lump
194 Which well you may see at the Zoo;
195 But uglier yet is the hump we get
196 From having little to do.
197
198 Kiddies and grown-ups too-oo-oo
199 If we haven't enough to do-oo-oo,
200 We get the hump -
201 Cameelious hump -
202 The hump that is black and blue!
203
204 We climb out of bed with a frouzly head
205 And a snarly-yarly voice.
206 We shiver and scowl and we grunt and we growl
207 At our bath and our boots and our toys;
208
209 And there ought to be a corner for me
210 (And I know there is one for you)
211 When we get the hump -
212 Cameelious hump -
213 The hump that is black and blue!
214
215 The cure for this ill is to not sit still,
216 Or frowst with a book by the fire;
217 But to take a large hoe and a shovel also,
218 And dig till you gentle perspire;
219
220 And then you will find that the sun and the wind,
221 And the Djinn of the Garden too,
222 Have lifted the hump -
223 The horrible hump -
224 The hump that is black and blue!
225
226 I get it as well as you-oo-oo -
227 If I haven't enough to do-oo-oo!
228 We all get hump -
229 Cameelious hump -
230 Kiddies and grown-ups too!
231
232
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233=head2 v5.29.5 - T. S. Eliot, "The Naming Of Cats"
234
235L<Announced on 2018-11-20 by Karen Etheridge|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/11/msg252839.html>
236
237 The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
238 It isn't just one of your holiday games;
239 You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
240 When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
241 First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,
242 Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
243 Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey--
244 All of them sensible everyday names.
245 There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
246 Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
247 Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter--
248 But all of them sensible everyday names.
249 But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,
250 A name that's peculiar, and more dignified,
251 Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,
252 Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
253 Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
254 Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
255 Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum-
256 Names that never belong to more than one cat.
257 But above and beyond there's still one name left over,
258 And that is the name that you never will guess;
259 The name that no human research can discover--
260 But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
261 When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
262 The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
263 His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
264 Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
265 His ineffable effable
266 Effanineffable
267 Deep and inscrutable singular Name.
268
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269=head2 v5.29.4 - The Mountain Goats, "Oceanographer's Choice"
270
271L<Announced on 2018-10-20 by Aaron Crane|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/10/msg252575.html>
272
273 Well
274 Guy in a skeleton costume
275 Comes up to the guy in the Superman suit
276 Runs through him with a broadsword
277 I flipped the television off
278 Bring all the bright lights up
279 Turn the radio up loud
280 I don't know why I'm so persuaded
281 That if I think things through
282 Long enough and hard enough
283 I'll somehow get to you
284 But then you came in and we locked eyes
285 You kicked the ashtray over as we came toward each other
286 Stubbed my cigarette out against the west wall
287 Quickly lit another
288 Look at that
289 Would you look at that?
290 We're throwing off sparks
291 What will I do when I don't have you
292 To hold onto in the dark?
293
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294=head2 v5.29.3 - Mac Miller, "Senior Skip Day"
295
296L<Announced on 2018-09-20 by John 'genehack' Anderson|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/09/msg252255.html>
297
298 Enjoy the best things in your life
299 ’Cause you ain’t gonna get to live it twice
300 They say you waste time asleep
301 But I’m just tryin’ to dream
302
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303=head2 v5.29.2 - Rick Riordan, "The Lightning Thief"
304
305L<Announced on 2018-08-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/08/msg251918.html>
306
307 Look, I didn't want to be a half-blood.
308
309 If you're reading this because you think you might be one,
310 my advice is: close this book right now. Believe whatever
311 lie your mom or dad told you about your birth, and try
312 to lead a normal life.
313
314 Being a half-blood is dangerous. It's scary. Most of the time,
315 it gets you killed in painful, nasty ways.
316
317 If you're a normal kid, reading this because you think it's
318 fiction, great. Read on. I envy you for being able to believe
319 that none of this ever happened.
320
321 But if you recognize yourself in these pages - if you feel
322 something stirring inside - stop reading immediately.
323 You might be one of us. And once you know that, it's only a
324 matter of time before they sense it too, and they'll come for you.
325
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326=head2 v5.29.1 - Richard Curtis & Ben Elton, "Blackadder, Series 3, Episode 2: Ink and Incapability"
327
328L<Announced on 2018-07-20 by Steve Hay|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/07/msg251605.html>
329
330 Dr. Samuel Johnson: Here it is, sir: the very cornerstone of English
331 scholarship. This book, sir, contains every word in our beloved
332 language.
333
334 Prince Regent George: Hmm.
335
336 Edmund Blackadder: Every single one, sir?
337
338 Johnson: (confidently) Every single word, sir!
339
340 Blackadder: (to Prince) Oh, well, in that case, sir, I hope you will
341 not object if I also offer the Doctor my most enthusiastic
342 contrafribularities.
343
344 Johnson: What?
345
346 Blackadder: 'Contrafribularities,' sir? It is a common word down our
347 way.
348
349 Johnson: Damn! (writes in the book)
350
351 Blackadder: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I'm anaspeptic, phrasmotic, even
352 compunctious to have caused you such pericombobulation.
353
354 Johnson: What? What? WHAT?
355
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356=head2 v5.29.0 - Erle Stanley Gardner, The Case of the Grinning Gorilla
357
7df03490 358L<Announced on 2018-06-26 by Sawyer X|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/251297>
cdef8bf0 359
7df03490 360 Courage is the only antidote for danger.
cdef8bf0 361
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362=head2 v5.28.2 - Edward Lear, ed. Vivien Noakes, "The Complete Nonsense and Other Verse": The Jumblies
363
364L<Announced on 2019-04-19 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/04/msg254456.html>
365
366 They went to sea in a Sieve, they did,
367 In a Sieve they went to sea:
368 In spite of all their friends could say,
369 On a winter's morn, on a stormy day,
370 In a Sieve they went to sea!
371 And when the Sieve turned round and round,
372 And every one cried, 'You'll all be drowned!'
373 They called aloud, 'Our Sieve ain't big,
374 But we don't care a button! we don't care a fig!
375 In a Sieve we'll go to sea!'
376 Far and few, far and few,
377 Are the lands where the Jumblies live;
378 Their heads are green, and their hands are blue,
379 And they went to sea in a Sieve.
380
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381=head2 v5.28.2-RC1 - Edward Lear, ed. Vivien Noakes, "The Complete Nonsense and Other Verse": The Quangle Wangle's Hat
382
383L<Announced on 2019-04-05 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2019/04/msg254218.html>
384
385 On the top of the Crumpetty Tree
386 The Quangle Wangle sat,
387 But his face you could not see,
388 On account of his Beaver Hat.
389 For his Hat was a hundred and two feet wide,
390 With ribbons and bibbons on every side,
391 And bells, and buttons, and loops, and lace,
392 So that nobody ever could see the face
393 Of the Quangle Wangle Quee.
394
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395=head2 v5.28.1 - Humphrey Burton, "Leonard Bernstein"
396
397L<Announced on 2018-11-29 by Steve Hay|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/11/msg252975.html>
398
399On August 25, 1983, Leonard Bernstein celebrated his sixty-fifth
400birthday in his birthplace, Lawrence, Massachusetts. He had actually
401lived in the town for only a few weeks as a newborn baby, and had last
402visited it forty-nine years previously, in 1934, to get the name on his
403birth certificate altered from Louis to Leonard. But the citizens of
404Lawrence proposed to dedicate an outdoor theater to him in their
405heritage park and to provide not one but two local orchestras--the
406Merrimack Valley Philharmonic to play excerpts from his own compositions
407and the Greater Boston Youth Symphony and Chorus to perform the "Ode to
408Joy" and accompany Bernstein himself reading (for the only time in his
409life) the text of A Lincoln Portrait. So Bernstein turned down birthday
410invitations from Tanglewood and Central Park, New York, and the
411Hollywood Bowl and drove through the cheering if slightly bewildered
412crowds lining the streets of Lawrence in an open-topped 1928 Ford
413roadster, looking as homespun as James Stewart in Frank Capra's classic,
414It's a Wonderful Life.
415
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416=head2 v5.28.0 - Martin Luther King, Jr., 1967
417
7df03490 418L<Announced on 2018-06-22 by Sawyer X|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/251240>
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419
420 When we look at modern man we have to face the fact that modern man
421 suffers from a kind of poverty of the spirit which stands in glaring
422 contrast with his scientific and technological abundance. We've learned
423 to fly the air as birds, we've learned to swim the seas as fish, yet we
424 haven't learned to walk the earth as brothers and sisters.
425
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426=head2 v5.28.0-RC4 - Neil Gaiman, The Graveyard Book
427
7df03490 428L<Announced on 2018-06-19 by Sawyer X|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/251212>
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429
430 You're alive, Bod. That means you have infinite potential. You can do
431 anything, make anything, dream anything. If you can change the world,
432 the world will change. Potential. Once you're dead, it's gone. Over.
433 You've made what you've made, dreamed your dream, written your name.
434 You may be buried here, you may even walk. But that potential is
7df03490 435 finished.
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437=head2 v5.28.0-RC3 - Anthony Horowitz, Magpie Murders
438
af287082 439L<Announced on 2018-06-18 by Sawyer X|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/251204>
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440
441 These had been his plans. But if there was one thing that life had
442 taught him, it was the futility of making plans. Life had its own
443 agenda.
444
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445=head2 v5.28.0-RC2 - Oliver Sacks, The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat: And Other Clinical Tales
446
447L<Announced on 2018-06-06 by Sawyer X|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/251122>
448
449 Had she not been of exceptional intelligence and literacy, with an
450 imagination filled and sustained, so to speak, by the images of
451 others, images conveyed by language, by the word, she might have
452 remained almost as helpless as a baby.
453
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454=head2 v5.28.0-RC1 - Anu Garg, A Word A Day
455
636adee6 456L<Announced on 2018-05-21 by Sawyer X|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/05/msg250999.html>
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457
458 One doesn't have to know the unit of pain (dol) to realize that the
459 unit of joy is not the dollar, or any other currency for that matter.
460
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461=head2 v5.27.11 - Tana French, In the Woods
462
dcde8ffd 463L<Announced on 2018-04-20 by Sawyer X|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/04/msg250571.html>
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464
465 And then, too, I had learned early to assume something dark and
466 lethal hidden at the heart of anything I loved. When I couldn't find
467 it, I responded, bewildered and wary, in the only way I knew how: by
525f6500 468 planting it there myself.
09ab1dc2 469
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470=head2 v5.27.10 - Robert A. Heinlein, Time Enough for Love, p. 248
471
472L<Announced on 2018-03-20 by Todd Rinaldo|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/03/msg250042.html>
473
474 A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher
475 a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts,
476 build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders,
477 cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure,
478 program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly.
479 Specialization is for insects.
480
e60142ac 481=head2 v5.27.9 - Agatha Christie, "The Mysterious Affair at Styles"
482
483L<Announced on 2018-02-20 by Renee Bäcker|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/02/msg249549.html>
484
485 Poirot was an extraordinary looking little man. He was hardly more
486 than five feet, four inches, but carried himself with great dignity.
487 His head was exactly the shape of an egg, and he always perched it
488 a little on one side. His moustache was very stiff and military.
489 The neatness of his attire was almost incredible. I believe a
490 speck of dust would have caused him more pain than a bullet wound.
491 Yet this quaint dandified little man who, I was sorry to see, now
492 limped badly, had been in his time one of the most celebrated members
493 of the Belgian police. As a detective, his flair had been extraordinary,
494 and he had achieved triumphs by unravelling some of the most baffling
495 cases of the day.
496 He pointed out to me the little house inhabited by him and his fellow
497 Belgians, and I promised to go and see him at an early date. Then he
498 raised his hat with a flourish to Cynthia, and we drove away.
499 "He's a dear little man," said Cynthia. "I'd no idea you knew him."
500 "You've been entertaining a celebrity unawares," I replied.
501 And, for the rest of the way home, I recited to them the various
502 exploits and triumphs of Hercule Poirot.
503
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504=head2 v5.27.8 - Jasper Fforde, "Shades of Grey"
505
506L<Announced on 2018-01-20 by Abigail|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/248914>
507
5082.4.16.55.021: Males are to wear dresscode #6 during inter-Collective
509travel. Hats are encouraged, but not required.
510
5119.3.88.32.025: The cucumber and tomato are both fruit; the avocado
512is a nut. To assist with the dietary requirements of vegetarians,
513on the first Tuesday of the month a chicken is officially a vegetable.
514
5155.3.21.01.002: Once allocated, postcodes are permanent, and for life.
516
5176.1.02.11.235: Artifacture from before the Something That Happened
518may be collected, so long it does not appear on the Leapback list
519or possess color above 23 percent saturation.
520
5212.3.06.02.087: Unnecessary sharpening of pencils constitutes a waste
522of public resources, and will be punished as appropriate.
523
5242.1.01.05.002: All children are to attent school until the age of
525sixteen or until they have learned everything, whichever be the sooner.
526
5271.3.02.06.023: There shall be no staring at the sun, however good
528the reason.
529
5301.1.19.02.006: Team sports are mandatory in order to build character.
531Character is there to give purpose to team sports.
532
5332.3.03.01.006: Juggling shall not be practiced after 4:00 pm.
534
535
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536=head2 v5.27.7 - Terry Pratchett, "Hogfather"
537
538L<Announced on 2017-12-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/12/msg248274.html>
539
540 Death looked at the sacks.
541
542 It was a strange but demonstrable fact that the sacks of
543 toys carried by the Hogfather, no matter what they
544 really contained, always appeared to have sticking out
545 of the top a teddy bear, a toy soldier in the kind of
546 colorful uniform that would stand out in a disco, a
547 drum and a red-and-white candy cane. The actual
548 contents always turned out to be something a bit
549 garish and costing $5.99.
550
551 Death had investigated one or two. There had been a
552 Real Agatean Ninja, for example, with Fearsome
553 Death Grip, and a Captain Carrot One-Man Night
554 Watch with a complete wardrobe of toy weapons, each
555 of which cost as much as the original wooden doll in
556 the first place.
557
558 Mind you, the stuff for the girls was just as
559 depressing. It seemed to be nearly all horses. Most of
560 them were grinning. Horses, Death felt, shouldn't grin.
561
562 Any horse that was grinning was planning something.
563
b508aa38
KE
564=head2 v5.27.6 - Ogden Nash, "Behold the Duck"
565
b32be96e
KE
566L<Announced on 2017-11-20 by Karen Etheridge|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/11/msg247489.html>
567
b508aa38
KE
568 Behold the duck,
569 it does not cluck;
570 a cluck it lacks,
571 it quacks!
572
573 It is 'specially fond
574 of puddles or ponds;
575 when it dines or sups
576 it bottoms ups.
577
578
5f64ee11
SH
579=head2 v5.27.5 - Frank Birch, Dilly Knox & G. P. Mackeson, "Alice in I.D.25"
580
581L<Announced on 2017-10-20 by Steve Hay|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/10/msg246785.html>
582
a474ee7c
KE
583 'Can I do anything?' Alice suggested timidly, thinking that something
584 dreadful must have happened.
585 The Waterflap jumped as if it had been shot. 'What are you doing
586 here?' it snapped. 'Take this at once into the Directional room,' and it
587 thrust the paper which had caused all the fuss into her hands.
588 'But where is the Directional room?' she inquired, bewildered.
589 'Why, there of course,' howled the Waterflap, pointing to a door.
590 'How could I possibly know that!' Alice exclaimed, angered by his
591 rudeness.
592 'Silly girl,' it hissed. 'Why, it's called the Directional room
593 because it's in that direction,' and it pushed her roughly through the
594 doorway.
5f64ee11 595
dcbda5b6
JSA
596=head2 v5.27.4 - Richard Brautigan, "All Watched Over By Machines Of Loving Grace"
597
598L<Announced on 2017-09-20 by John SJ Anderson|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/09/msg246371.html>
599
4f332031
SH
600 I like to think (and
601 the sooner the better!)
602 of a cybernetic meadow
603 where mammals and computers
604 live together in mutually
605 programming harmony
606 like pure water
607 touching clear sky.
608
609 I like to think
610 (right now, please!)
611 of a cybernetic forest
612 filled with pines and electronics
613 where deer stroll peacefully
614 past computers
615 as if they were flowers
616 with spinning blossoms.
617
618 I like to think
619 (it has to be!)
620 of a cybernetic ecology
621 where we are free of our labors
622 and joined back to nature,
623 returned to our mammal
624 brothers and sisters,
625 and all watched over
626 by machines of loving grace.
dcbda5b6 627
f2b406d8
MH
628=head2 v5.27.3 - Rodgers and Hammerstein, "You'll Never Walk Alone"
629
4f332031 630L<Announced on 2017-08-21 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/08/msg245988.html>
f2b406d8
MH
631
632 When you walk through a storm
633 Hold your head up high
634 And don't be afraid of the dark
635
636 At the end of a storm
637 There's a golden sky
638 And the sweet silver song of a lark
639
640 Walk on through the wind
641 Walk on through the rain
642 Though your dreams be tossed and blown
643
644 Walk on, walk on
645 With hope in your heart
646 And you'll never walk alone
647
648 You'll never walk alone
649
650 Walk on, walk on
651 With hope in your heart
652 And you'll never walk alone
653
654 You'll never walk alone
655
17335434
AC
656=head2 v5.27.2 - Lev Grossman, Codex
657
658L<Announced on 2017-07-20 by Aaron Crane|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/07/msg245585.html>
659
660 He went back for another stack of books: a three-volume English legal
661 treatise; a travel guide to Tuscany from the '20s crammed with faded
662 Italian wildflowers that fluttered out from between the pages like
663 moths; a French edition of Turgeniev so decayed that it came apart in
664 his hands; a register of London society from 1863. In a way it was
665 idiotic. He was treating these books like they were holy relics. It
666 wasn't like he would ever actually read them. But there was something
667 magnetic about them, something that compelled respect, even the silly
668 ones, like the Enlightenment treatise about how lightning was caused
669 by bees. They were information, data, but not in the form he was used
670 to dealing with it. They were non-digital, nonelectrical chunks of
671 memory, not stamped out of silicon but laboriously crafted out of wood
672 pulp and ink, leather and glue. Somebody had cared enough to write
673 these things; somebody else had cared enough to buy them, possibly
674 even read them, at the very least keep them safe for 150 years,
675 sometimes longer, when they could have vanished at the touch of a
676 spark. That made them worth something, didn't it, just by itself?
677 Though most of them would have bored him rigid the second he cracked
678 them open, which there wasn't much chance of. Maybe that was what he
679 found so appealing: the sight of so many books that he'd never have to
680 read, so much work he'd never have to do.
681
c31f5723
EH
682=head2 v5.27.1 - Rona Munro, Doctor Who: Survival
683
4de305e1 684L<Announced on 2017-06-20 by Eric Herman|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/06/msg245055.html>
c31f5723
EH
685
686 There are worlds out there where the sky is burning,
687 where the sea's asleep and the rivers dream,
688 people made of smoke and cities made of song.
689 Somewhere there's danger,
690 somewhere there's injustice
691 and somewhere else the tea is getting cold.
692 Come on, Ace, we've got work to do.
693
694=head2 v5.27.0 - Bertrand Russell, The Road to Happiness
695
1e189079 696L<Announced on 2017-05-31 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/05/msg244580.html>
aeb6dc77
S
697
698 People who have theories as to how one should live tend to forget the
699 limitations of nature. If your way of life involves constant
700 restraint of impulse for the sake of some one supreme aim that you
701 have set yourself, it is likely that the aim will become increasingly
702 distasteful because of the efforts that it demands; impulse, denied
703 its normal outlets, will find others, probably in spite; pleasure, if
704 you allow yourself any at all, will be dissociated from the main
705 current of your life, and will become Bacchic and frivolous. Such
706 pleasure brings no happiness, but only a deeper despair.
707
708 -- Bertrand Russell, The Road to Happiness
709
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SH
710=head2 v5.26.3 - Humphrey Burton, "Leonard Bernstein"
711
712L<Announced on 2018-11-29 by Steve Hay|http://nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/11/msg252974.html>
713
714The origins of the name "Bernstein" are sometimes linked with the German
715noun Bernstein, which means "amber"--a translucent yellowish fossilized
716resin, used for ornaments and thought to possess magical properties.
717Leonard Bernstein would later call himself "Lenny Amber" when he needed
718a pseudonym for the popular piano transcriptions he published in his
719mid-twenties, and his business affairs would be organized within a
720company called Amberson Enterprises. There are several towns and
721villages named Bernstein in Germany and Austria (where the pronunciation
722is BernSTINE), but Bernstein's parents came from Jewish ghettos in
723northwestern Ukraine, where the last syllable is usually pronounced
724BernSHTAYN or STEEN. Sam insisted, however, on the mid-European style
725employed by the earlier immigrants.
726
15e2c76d
SH
727=head2 v5.26.2 - Desmond Morris, "Catwatching: The Essential Guide to Cat Behaviour"
728
729L<Announced on 2018-04-14 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/04/msg250440.html>
730
731How does a cat use its whiskers? The usual answer is that the whiskers
732are feelers that enable a cat to tell whether a gap is wide enough for
733it to squeeze through, but the truth is more complicated and more
734remarkable. In addition to their obvious role as feelers sensitive to
735touch, the whiskers also operate as air-current detectors. As the cat
736moves along in the dark it needs to manoeuvre past solid objects without
737touching them. Each solid object it approaches causes slight eddies in
738the air, minute disturbances in the currents of air movements, and the
739cat's whiskers are so amazingly sensitive that they can read these air
740changes and respond to the presence of solid obstacles even without
741touching them.
742
811612a1
SH
743=head2 v5.26.2-RC1 - Desmond Morris, "Catwatching: The Essential Guide to Cat Behaviour"
744
745L<Announced on 2018-03-24 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/03/msg250103.html>
746
747Cats have a way of endearing themselves to their owners, not just by
748their 'kittenoid' behaviour, which stimulates strong parental feelings,
749but also by their sheer gracefulness. There is an elegance and a
750composure about them that captivates the human eye. To the sensitive
751human being it becomes a privilege to share a room with a cat, exchange
752its glance, feel its greeting rub, or watch it gently luxuriate itself
753into a snoozing ball on a soft cushion.
754
a27f6b04
SH
755=head2 v5.26.1 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner"
756
757L<Announced on 2017-09-22 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/09/msg246408.html>
758
759 And soon I heard a roaring wind:
760 It did not come anear;
761 But with its sound it shook the sails,
762 That were so thin and sere.
763
764 The upper air burst into life!
765 And a hundred fire-flags sheen,
766 To and fro they were hurried about!
767 And to and fro, and in and out,
768 The wan stars danced between.
769
3ff4feb5
SH
770=head2 v5.26.1-RC1 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner"
771
772L<Announced on 2017-09-10 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/09/msg246202.html>
773
774 At length did cross an Albatross,
775 Thorough the fog it came;
776 As if it had been a Christian soul,
777 We hailed it in God's name.
778
779 It ate the food it ne'er had eat,
780 And round and round it flew.
781 The ice did split with a thunder-fit;
782 The helmsman steered us through!
783
784 And a good south wind sprung up behind;
785 The Albatross did follow,
786 And every day, for food or play,
787 Came to the mariner's hollo!
788
789 In mist or cloud, on mast or shroud,
790 It perched for vespers nine;
791 Whiles all the night, through fog-smoke white,
792 Glimmered the white Moon-shine.'
793
794 'God save thee, ancient Mariner!
8d1c7d0a
DIM
795 From the fiends, that plague thee thus!—
796 Why look'st thou so?'—With my cross-bow
3ff4feb5
SH
797 I shot the ALBATROSS.
798
22e3e755
S
799=head2 v5.26.0 - Nine Simone, Ain't Got No / I Got Life
800
1043e0cd 801L<Announced on 2017-05-30 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/05/msg244573.html>
22e3e755
S
802
803 I've got the life
804 And I'm gonna keep it
805 I've got the life
806 And nobody's gonna take it away
807 I've got the life
808
98be9e26
S
809=head2 v5.26.0-RC2 - Richard Condon, The Manchurian Candidate
810
1144d5d0
S
811L<Announced on 2017-05-23 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/05/msg244511.html>
812
98be9e26
S
813 Amateur psychiatric prognosis can be fascinating when there is
814 absolutely nothing else to do.
815
893ca599
S
816=head2 v5.26.0-RC1 - Thomas Paine, Common Sense
817
818L<Announced on 2017-05-11 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/05/msg244337.html>
819
820 A long habit of not thinking a thing WRONG, gives it a superficial
821 appearance of being RIGHT, and raises at first a formidable outcry in
822 defense of custom. But the tumult soon subsides. Time makes more
823 converts than reason.
824
fa56f920
S
825=head2 v5.25.12 - Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five
826
78d5fac0 827L<Announced on 2017-04-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/04/msg244146.html>
fa56f920
S
828
829 I have told my sons that they are not under any circumstances to take
830 part in massacres, and that the news of massacres of enemies is not
831 to fill them with satisfaction or glee.
832
833 I have also told them not to work for companies which make massacre
834 machinery, and to express contempt for people who think we need
835 machinery like that.
836
439ae22f
S
837=head2 v5.25.11 - Daniel Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow
838
c490dda1
S
839L<Announced on 2017-03-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/03/msg243624.html>
840
439ae22f
S
841 Subjective confidence in a judgment is not a reasoned evaluation of
842 the probability that this judgment is correct. Confidence is a
843 feeling, which reflects the coherence of the information and the
844 cognitive ease of processing it. It is wise to take admissions of
845 uncertainty seriously, but declarations of high confidence mainly
846 tell you that an individual has constructed a coherent story in his
847 mind, not necessarily that the story is true.
848
fd4b847f 849=head2 v5.25.10 - Erich Fried, 1968
850
851L<Announced on 2017-02-20 by Renee Bäcker|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/02/msg243173.html>
852
853 He who wants the world to remain as it is
854 doesn't want it to remain.
855
564196c4
A
856=head2 v5.25.9 - A. A. Milne, "Winnie-the-Pooh", 1926
857
858L<Announced on 2017-01-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/01/msg242405.html>
859
860 Pooh always liked a little something at eleven o'clock in the
861 morning, and he was very glad to see Rabbit getting out the plates
862 and mugs; and when Rabbit said, "Honey or condensed milk with
863 your bread?" he was so excited that he said, "Both," and then,
864 so as not to seem greedy, he added, "But don't bother about the
865 bread, please."
866
252af0e3
S
867=head2 v5.25.8 - Langston Hughes, So long
868
7e3e9d6d 869L<Announced on 2016-12-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/12/msg241739.html>
252af0e3
S
870
871 So long
872 is in the song
873 and it's in the way you're gone
874 but it's like a foreign language
875 in my mind
876 and maybe was I blind
877 I could not see
878 and would not know
879 you're gone so long
880 so long.
881
a3279489
CG
882=head2 v5.25.7 - J.R.R. Tolkien, "The Silmarillion"
883
884L<Announced on 2016-11-20 by Chad 'Exodist' Granum|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/11/msg241120.html>
885
886 Of Beren and Lúthien
887
888 Among the tales of sorrow and of ruin that come down to us from the darkness of
889 those days there are yet some in which amid weeping there is joy and under the
890 shadow of death light that endures. And of these histories most fair still in
891 the ears of the Elves is the tale of Beren and Lúthien. Of their lives was made
892 the Lay of Leithian, Release from Bondage, which is the longest save one of the
893 songs concerning the world of old; but here is told in fewer words and without
894 song.
895
fd1f6f9a
AC
896=head2 v5.25.6 - Alan Warner, "The Sopranos"
897
898L<Announced on 2016-10-10 by Aaron Crane|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/10/msg240406.html>
899
900 I'm up on all the pop trivia, says the guy with the stud in his tongue.
901 Are you?
3f0ff2a3 902 Yes. Do you know who the lead singer of Echo and the Bunnymen is?
fd1f6f9a
AC
903 Let me guess, is he called Echo?
904 Good guess but no, anyway when they played Glastonbury it was so
905 muddy he had two roadies to hold up a binliner on each of his legs so
906 they wouldn't get covered in mud.
907 That's what being rich and famous is all about, having someone
908 else hold up your binliners on each leg when you're wandering across
909 a sea of shite.
910 Do you know what Sammy Davis Junior said being black and famous in
911 America meant?
912 No.
913 He said being black and famous in America meant he could be
914 refused entry to exclusive clubs and restaurants that other people
915 could only ever dream of going to. Do you know Michael Stipe likes to
916 send his remote control toy cars onto stage while his support band are
917 playing to freak them out?
918 Who's Michael Stipe?
919 You're not really a pop trivia person, are you, Kylah?
920 No, I'm not, Stephen.
921
bd1448f7
SL
922=head2 v5.25.5 - Philip K. Dick, VALIS
923
924L<Announced on 2016-09-20 by Stevan Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/09/msg239887.html>
925
926 We hypostatize information into objects. Rearrangement of objects is
927 change in the content of the information; the message has changed.
928 This is a language which we have lost the ability to read. We ourselves
929 are a part of this language; changes in us are changes in the content
930 of the information. We ourselves are information-rich; information
931 enters us, is processed and is then projected outward once more, now
932 in an altered form. We are not aware that we are doing this, that in
933 fact this is all we are doing
934
e93570ad
CBW
935=head2 v5.25.4 - Terry Pratchett, "Truckers"
936
937L<Announced on 2016-08-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/08/msg239191.html>
938
939 Concerning Nomes and Time
940
941 Nomes are small. On the whole, small creatures don't live for a long
942 time. But perhaps they do live fast.
943
944 Let me explain.
945
946 One of the shortest-lived creatures on the planet Earth is the adult
947 common mayfly. It lasts for one day. The longest-living things are
948 bristlecone pine trees, at 4,700 years and still counting.
949
950 This may seem tough on the mayflies. But the important thing is not
951 how long your life is, but how long it seems.
952
953 To a mayfly, a single hour may last as long as a century. Perhaps
954 old mayflies sit around complaining about how life this minute isn't a
955 patch on the good old minutes of long ago, when the world was
956 young and the sun seemed so much brighter and larvae showed you a
957 bit of respect. Whereas the trees, which are not famous to their
958 quick reactions, may just have time to notice the way the sky keeps
959 flickering before the dry rot and woodworm set in.
960
961 It's all a sort of relativity. The faster you live, the more time
962 stretches out. To a nome, a year lasts as long as ten years does to a
963 human. Remember it. Don't let it concern you. They don't. They don't
964 even know.
965
4d3fd699
SH
966=head2 v5.25.3 - Edward Lear, ed. Vivien Noakes, "The Complete Nonsense and Other Verse": The Dong with a Luminous Nose
967
968L<Announced on 2016-07-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/07/msg238158.html>
969
970 When awful darkness and silence reign
971 Over the great Gromboolian plain,
972 Through the long, long wintry nights; -
973 When the angry breakers roar
974 As they beat on the rocky shore; -
975 When Storm-clouds brood on the towering heights
976 Of the Hills of the Chankly Bore: -
977
978 Then, through the vast and gloomy dark,
979 There moves what seems a fiery spark,
980 A lonely spark with silvery rays
981 Piercing the coal-black night, -
982 A Meteor strange and bright: -
983 Hither and thither the vision strays,
984 A single lurid light.
985
986 Slowly it wanders, - pauses, - creeps, -
987 Anon it sparkles, - flashes and leaps;
988 And ever as onward it gleaming goes
989 A light on the Bong-tree stems it throws.
990 And those who watch at that midnight hour
991 From Hall or Terrace, or lofty Tower,
992 Cry, as the wild light passes along, -
993 'The Dong! - the Dong!
994 The wandering Dong through the forest goes!
995 The Dong! the Dong!
996 The Dong with a luminous Nose!'
997
e340d4b1
MH
998=head2 v5.25.2 - Dan le Sac Vs Scroobius Pip "Waiting For The Beat To Kick In"
999
1000L<Announced on 2016-06-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/06/msg237274.html>
1001
1002 Waiting for the beat to kick in
1003 But it never does
1004 Waiting for my feet to grow wings
1005 That lift me above
1006 All of these tiresome things
1007 That we know and love
1008 Waiting for the beat to kick in
1009 But it never does
1010
3d809c37
S
1011=head2 v5.25.1 - Eli Pariser, "The Filter Bubble"
1012
5f602b3b 1013L<Announced on 2016-05-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/05/msg236566.html>
3d809c37
S
1014
1015Imagine that you're a smart high school student on the low end of the social
1016totem pole. You're alienated from adult authority, but unlike many teenagers,
1017you're also alienated from the power structures of your peers -- an existence
1018that can feel lonely and peripheral. Systems and equations are intuitive, but
1019people aren't -- social signals are confusing and messy, difficult to interpret.
1020
1021Then you discover code. You may be powerless at the lunch table, but code
1022gives you power over an infinitely malleable world and opens the door to a
1023symbolic system that's perfectly clear and ordered. The jostling for position
1024and status fades away. The nagging parental voices disappear. There's just a
1025clean, white page for you to fill, an opportunity to build a better place, a
1026home, from the ground up.
1027
1028No wonder you're a geek.
1029
0f51bd1b
RS
1030=head2 v5.25.0 - Robert Frost, "The Trial by Existence"
1031
1032L<Announced on 2016-05-09 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/05/msg236244.html>
1033
1034 Even the bravest that are slain
1035 Shall not dissemble their surprise
1036 On waking to find valor reign,
1037 Even as on earth, in paradise;
1038 And where they sought without the sword
1039 Wide fields of asphodel fore’er,
1040 To find that the utmost reward
1041 Of daring should be still to dare.
1042
15e2c76d
SH
1043=head2 v5.24.4 - Desmond Morris, "Catwatching: The Essential Guide to Cat Behaviour"
1044
1045L<Announced on 2018-04-14 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/04/msg250439.html>
1046
1047Cats hate doors. Doors simply do not register in the evolutionary story
1048of the cat family. They constantly block patrolling activities and
1049prevent cats from exploring their home range and then returning to their
1050central, secure base at will. Humans often do not understand that a cat
1051needs to make only a brief survey of its territory before returning with
1052all the necessary information about the activities of other cats in the
1053vicinity. It likes to make these tours of inspection at frequent
1054intervals, but does not want to stay outside for very long, unless there
1055has been some special and unexpected change in the condition of the
1056local feline population.
1057
811612a1
SH
1058=head2 v5.24.4-RC1 - Desmond Morris, "Catwatching: The Essential Guide to Cat Behaviour"
1059
1060L<Announced on 2018-03-24 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2018/03/msg250102.html>
1061
1062The domestic cat is a contradiction. No animal has developed such an
1063intimate relationship with mankind, while at the same time demanding and
1064getting such independence of movement and action. The dog may be man's
1065best friend, but it is rarely allowed out on its own to wander from
1066garden to garden or street to street. The obedient dog has to be taken
1067for a walk. The headstrong cat walks alone.
1068
a27f6b04
SH
1069=head2 v5.24.3 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner"
1070
1071L<Announced on 2017-09-22 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/09/msg246407.html>
1072
1073 Oh sleep! it is a gentle thing,
1074 Beloved from pole to pole!
1075 To Mary Queen the praise be given!
1076 She sent the gentle sleep from Heaven,
1077 That slid into my soul.
1078
1079 The silly buckets on the deck,
1080 That had so long remained,
1081 I dreamt that they were filled with dew;
1082 And when I awoke, it rained.
1083
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SH
1084=head2 v5.24.3-RC1 - Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner"
1085
1086L<Announced on 2017-09-10 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/09/msg246201.html>
1087
1088 'And now the STORM-BLAST came, and he
1089 Was tyrannous and strong:
1090 He struck with his o'ertaking wings,
1091 And chased us south along.
1092
1093 With sloping masts and dipping prow,
1094 As who pursued with yell and blow
1095 Still treads the shadow of his foe,
1096 And forward bends his head,
1097 The ship drove fast, loud roared the blast,
1098 And southward aye we fled.
1099
1100 And now there came both mist and snow,
1101 And it grew wondrous cold:
1102 And ice, mast-high, came floating by,
1103 As green as emerald.
1104
1105 And through the drifts the snowy clifts
1106 Did send a dismal sheen:
8d1c7d0a 1107 Nor shapes of men nor beasts we ken—
3ff4feb5
SH
1108 The ice was all between.
1109
1110 The ice was here, the ice was there,
1111 The ice was all around:
1112 It cracked and growled, and roared and howled,
1113 Like noises in a swound!
1114
44f2f7ec
SH
1115=head2 v5.24.2 - Roald Dahl, "The Three Little Pigs"
1116
1117L<Announced on 2017-07-15 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/07/msg245527.html>
1118
1119 A short while later, through the wood,
1120 Came striding brave Miss Riding Hood.
1121 The Wolf stood there, his eyes ablaze
1122 And yellowish, like mayonnaise.
1123 His teeth were sharp, his gums were raw,
1124 And spit was dripping from his jaw.
1125 Once more the maiden's eyelid flickers.
1126 She draws the pistol from her knickers.
1127 Once more, she hits the vital spot,
1128 And kills him with a single shot.
1129 Pig, peeping through the window, stood
1130 And yelled, 'Well done, Miss Riding Hood!'
1131
1132 Ah, Piglet, you must never trust
1133 Young ladies from the upper crust.
1134 For now, Miss Riding Hood, one notes,
1135 Not only has two wolfskin coats,
1136 But when she goes from place to place,
1137 She has a PIGSKIN TRAVELLING CASE.
1138
19eecef8
SH
1139=head2 v5.24.2-RC1 - Roald Dahl, "The Three Little Pigs"
1140
1141L<Announced on 2017-07-01 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/07/msg245292.html>
1142
1143 The animal I really dig
1144 Above all others is the pig.
1145 Pigs are noble. Pigs are clever,
1146 Pig are courteous. However,
1147 Now and then, to break this rule,
1148 One meets a pig who is a fool.
1149 What, for example, would you say
1150 If strolling through the woods one day,
1151 Right there in front of you you saw
1152 A pig who'd built his house of STRAW?
1153 The Wolf who saw it licked his lips,
1154 And said, 'That pig has had his chips.'
1155
a016fa10
SH
1156=head2 v5.24.1 - Charles Dodgson [as "Lewis Carroll"], "The Hunting of the Snark", Fit 4: The Hunting
1157
1158L<Announced on 2017-01-14 by Steve Hay|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/01/msg242259.html>
1159
1160 The Bellman looked uffish, and wrinkled his brow.
1161 'If only you'd spoken before!
1162 It's excessively awkward to mention it now,
1163 With the Snark, so to speak, at the door!
1164
1165 'We should all of us grieve, as you well may believe,
1166 If you never were met with again -
1167 But surely, my man, when the voyage began,
1168 You might have suggested it then?
1169
1170 'It's excessively awkward to mention it now -
1171 As I think I've already remarked.'
1172 And the man they called 'Hi!' replied, with a sigh,
1173 'I informed you the day we embarked.
1174
1175 'You may charge me with murder - or want of sense -
1176 (We are all of us weak at times):
1177 But the slightest approach to a false pretence
1178 Was never among my crimes!
1179
1180 'I said it in Hebrew - I said it in Dutch -
1181 I said it in German and Greek:
1182 But I wholly forgot (and it vexes me much)
1183 That English is what you speak!'
1184
1185 ''Tis a pitiful tale,' said the Bellman, whose face
1186 Had grown longer at every word:
1187 'But, now that you've stated the whole of your case,
1188 More debate would be simply absurd.
1189
1190 'The rest of my speech' (he exclaimed to his men)
1191 'You shall hear when I've leisure to speak it.
1192 But the Snark is at hand, let me tell you again!
1193 'Tis your glorious duty to seek it!
1194
87bac28f
SH
1195=head2 v5.24.1-RC5 - John Milton, ed. Gordon Campbell, "Paradise Regained", Book IV
1196
1197L<Announced on 2017-01-02 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/01/msg242016.html>
1198
1199 Thus passed the night so foul, till Morning fair
1200 Came forth with pilgrim steps, in amice grey;
1201 Who with her radiant finger stilled the roar
1202 Of thunder, chased the clouds, and laid the winds,
1203 And grisly spectres, which the fiend had raised
1204 To tempt the Son of God with terrors dire.
1205 And now the sun with more effectual beams
1206 Had cheered the face of earth, and dried the wet
1207 From drooping plant, or dropping tree; the birds,
1208 Who all things now behold more fresh and green,
1209 After a night of storm so ruinous,
1210 Cleared up their choicest notes in bush and spray,
1211 To gratulate the sweet return of morn.
1212
8c805412
SH
1213=head2 v5.24.1-RC4 - John Milton, ed. Gordon Campbell, "Paradise Lost", Book II
1214
1215L<Announced on 2016-10-12 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/10/msg240224.html>
1216
1217 Before the gates there sat
1218 On either side a formidable shape;
1219 The one seemed woman to the waste, and fair,
1220 But ended foul in many a scaly fold,
1221 Voluminous and vast -- a serpent armed
1222 With mortal sting; about her middle round
1223 A cry of hell hounds never ceasing barked
1224 With wide Cerberean mouths full loud, and rung
1225 A hideous peal; yet, when they list, would creep,
1226 If aught disturbed their noise, into her womb,
1227 And kennel there; yet there still barked and howled
1228 Within unseen. Far less abhorred than these
1229 Vexed Scylla, bathing in the sea that parts
1230 Calabria from the hoarse Trinacrian shore;
1231 Nor uglier follow the night-hag, when, called
1232 In secret, riding through the air she comes,
1233 Lured with the smell of infant blood, to dance
1234 With Lapland witches, while the labouring moon
1235 Eclipses at their charms. The other shape --
1236 If shape it might be called that shape had none
1237 Distinguishable in member, joint, or limb;
1238 Or substance might be called that shadow seemed,
1239 For each seemed either -- black it stood as night,
1240 Fierce as ten Furies, terrible as hell,
1241 And shook a dreadful dart: what seemed his head
1242 The likeness of a kingly crown had on.
1243 Satan was now at hand, and from his seat
1244 The monster moving onward came as fast
1245 With horrid strides; hell trembled as he strode.
1246
80a17ed4
SH
1247=head2 v5.24.1-RC3 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers and Barbara Reynolds, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica III: Paradise, Canto XXIII
1248
1249L<Announced on 2016-08-11 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/08/msg238909.html>
1250
1251 A bird within the bower of her delight,
1252 Quiet upon the nest with her sweet brood
1253 Throughout the dark concealment of the night,
1254
1255 Anxious to look on them and gather food -
1256 No weary task for her, for as at play
1257 Blithely she toils to seek her fledglings' good -
1258
1259 Before the time, upon the topmost spray
1260 Eager awaits the sun and on the East
1261 Fixes her wakeful eye till break of day.
1262
9648eab6
SH
1263=head2 v5.24.1-RC2 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica II: Purgatory, Canto X
1264
1265L<Announced on 2016-07-25 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/07/msg238269.html>
1266
1267 When we had crossed the threshold of that gate
1268 Which the soul's evil loves put out of use,
1269 Because they make the crooked path seem straight,
1270
1271 I heard its closing clang ring clamorous,
1272 And had I then turned back my eyes to it
1273 How could my fault have found the least excuse?
1274
1275 We had to climb now through a rocky slit
1276 Which ran from side to side in many a swerve,
1277 As runs the wave in onset and retreat.
1278
1279 "Now here," the master said, "we must observe
1280 Some little caution, hugging now this wall,
1281 Now that, upon the far side of the curve."
1282
3a6ace9d
SH
1283=head2 v5.24.1-RC1 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica I: Hell, Canto XX
1284
1285L<Announced on 2016-07-17 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/07/msg238072.html>
1286
1287 New punishments behoves me sing in this
1288 Twentieth canto of my first canticle,
1289 Which tells of spirits sunk in the Abyss.
1290
1291 I now stood ready to observe the full
1292 Extent of the new chasm thus laid bare,
1293 Drenched as it was in tears most miserable.
1294
1295 Through the round vale I saw folk drawing near,
1296 Weeping and silent, and at such slow pace
1297 As Litany processions keep, up here.
1298
1299 And presently, when I had dropped my gaze
1300 Lower than the head, I saw them strangely wried
1301 'Twixt collar-bone and chin, so that the face
1302
1303 Of each was turned towards his own backside,
1304 And backwards must they needs creep with their feet,
1305 All power of looking forward being denied.
1306
0f51bd1b
RS
1307=head2 v5.24.0 - Robert Frost, "The Black Cottage"
1308
1309L<Announced on 2016-05-09 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/05/msg236242.html>
1310
1311 As I sit here, and oftentimes, I wish
1312 I could be monarch of a desert land
1313 I could devote and dedicate forever
1314 To the truths we keep coming back and back to.
1315 So desert it would have to be, so walled
1316 By mountain ranges half in summer snow,
1317 No one would covet it or think it worth
1318 The pains of conquering to force change on.
1319 Scattered oases where men dwelt, but mostly
1320 Sand dunes held loosely in tamarisk
1321 Blown over and over themselves in idleness.
1322 Sand grains should sugar in the natal dew
1323 The babe born to the desert, the sand storm
1324 Retard mid-waste my cowering caravans—
1325
1326 “There are bees in this wall.” He struck the clapboards,
1327 Fierce heads looked out; small bodies pivoted.
1328 We rose to go. Sunset blazed on the windows.
1329
1330=head2 v5.24.0-RC5 - The Mountain Goats, "No Children"
1331
1332L<Announced on 2016-05-04 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/05/msg236198.html>
1333
1334 And I hope when you think of me years down the line
1335 You can't find one good thing to say
1336 And I'd hope that if I found the strength to walk out
1337 You'd stay the hell out of my way
1338
1339 I am drowning, there is no sign of land
1340 You are coming down with me, hand in unlovable hand
1341
1342=head2 v5.24.0-RC4 - The Joker in "The Killing Joke"
1343
1344L<Announced on 2016-05-02 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/05/msg236145.html>
1345
1346"See, there were these two guys in a lunatic asylum…"
1347
1348=head2 v5.24.0-RC3 - Jesse Vincent
1349
1350L<Announced on 2016-04-27 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/04/msg236066.html>
1351
1352The Great Pumpkin is a Santa-Claus like figure. He does bring toys like
1353Santa. But unlike Santa, who gives away toys because it's his job, he
1354gives away toys because it's the right thing to do.
1355
1356=head2 v5.24.0-RC2 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
1357
1358L<Announced on 2016-04-23 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/04/msg235999.html>
1359
1360“How do you feel, Yossarian?”
1361
1362“Fine. No, I’m very frightened.”
1363
1364“That’s good,” said Major Danby. “It proves you’re still alive. It won’t
1365be fun.”
1366
1367Yossarian started out. “Yes it will.”
1368
1369“I mean it, Yossarian. You’ll have to keep on your toes every minute of
1370every day. They’ll bend heaven and earth to catch you.”
1371
1372“I’ll keep on my toes every minute.”
1373
1374“You’ll have to jump.”
1375
1376“I’ll jump.”
1377
1378“Jump!” Major Danby cried.
1379
1380Yossarian jumped.
1381
1382Nately’s [girl] was hiding just outside the door. The knife came down,
1383missing him by inches, and he took off.
1384
1385=head2 v5.24.0-RC1 - Robert Frost, "The Census-Taker"
1386
1387L<Announced on 2016-04-14 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/04/msg235807.html>
1388
1389 Nothing was left to do that I could see
1390 Unless to find that there was no one there
1391 And declare to the cliffs too far for echo,
1392 "The place is desert, and let whoso lurks
1393 In silence, if in this he is aggrieved,
1394 Break silence now or be forever silent.
1395 Let him say why it should not be declared so."
1396 The melancholy of having to count souls
1397 Where they grow fewer and fewer every year
1398 Is extreme where they shrink to none at all.
1399 It must be I want life to go on living.
1400
e68a8dd2
A
1401=head2 v5.23.9 - Tom Kitchin, "from nature to plate"
1402
1403L<Announced on 2016-03-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/03/msg235251.html>
1404
1405Spring
1406
1407Spring is the proper beginning of my kitchen and a season that I
1408look forward to with great anticipation. By the time spring arrives
1409I am desperate to welcome all the spring produce into my kitchen
1410and I long to work with fresh green vegetables again. As much as I
1411love root vegetables, such as celeriac and parsnips, and the heaver
1412meat and game dishes, I'm ready to leave those behind with winter
1413and begin a new adventure.
1414
1415Somehow spring always gives me a little bit of bounce in my feet
1416-- I feel like I want to kick off my shoes and dance around in my
1417kitchen. Not that I do, of course, but I feel lighter somehow. My
1418adrenalin kicks in with spring and so does the level of excitement,
1419as I think about all the produce that is about to come in.
1420
1421The moment spring arrives I'm eager to cook peas, broad beans, green
1422asparagus and other fresh vegetables! I want to create lighter,
1423brighter dishes and I can't wait to get my hands on the first greens
1424and the first morels, not to mention the first wild Scottish salmon.
1425Thanks to my network of trusted suppliers, I always get to first
1426produce of the season delivered to my restaurant as soon as it is
1427possible. I want my customers to experience and understand the
1428beauty of locally grown produce and to try things the minute they
1429are available so they can taste how incredibly fresh the ingredients
1430are. I also want them to understand the relationship between
1431seasonality and flavours. One of the most important things to
1432remember is to allow the seasons to inspire your dishes and help
1433you make natural matches. Wild spring herbs, such as sorrel, sweet
1434cicely and wild garlic, as well as spring salad leaves and green
1435lettuce served with wild salmon, wild sea trout, lamb or rabbit are
1436marriages made in heaven.
1437
1438
9cefda87
S
1439=head2 v5.23.8 - Patrick Rothfuss, "The Wise Man's Fear (The Kingkiller's Chronicle: Day Two)"
1440
da44b70c
SH
1441L<Announced on 2016-02-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/02/msg234535.html>
1442
9cefda87
S
1443Denna, on the other hand, had never been trained. She knew nothing
1444of shortcuts. You'd think she'd be forced to wander the city, lost and
1445helpless, trapped in a twisting maze of mortared stone.
1446
1447But instead, she simply walked throught the walls. She didn't know
1448any better. Nobody had ever told her she couldn't. Because of this,
1449she moved through the city like some faerie creature. She walked roads
1450no one else could see, and it made her music wild and strange and
1451free.
1452
da44b70c 1453=head2 v5.23.7 - William Gibson, "Neuromancer"
9c92e371 1454
f43a4a46 1455L<Announced on 2016-01-20 by Stevan Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/01/msg233856.html>
9c92e371
SL
1456
1457A year here and he still dreamed of cyberspace, hope fading
1458nightly. All the speed he took, all the turns he'd taken and
1459the corners he cut in Night City, and he'd still see the matrix
1460in his dreams, bright lattices of logic unfolding across that
1461colourless void...The Sprawl was a long, strange way home now
1462over the Pacific, and he was no Console Man, no cyberspace
1463cowboy. Just another hustler, trying to make it through. But
1464the dreams came on in the Japanese night like livewire voodoo,
1465and he'd cry for it, cry in his sleep, and wake alone in the
1466dark, curled in his capsule in some coffin hotel, hands clawed
1467into the bedslab, temper foam bunched between his fingers,
1468trying to reach the console that wasn't there.
1469
411a38f0
DG
1470=head2 v5.23.6 - 5.23 Episode VII
1471
f43a4a46
SH
1472L<Announced on 2015-12-21 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/12/msg233475.html>
1473
411a38f0
DG
1474 A long time ago in microseconds, in a galaxy not very far away...
1475
1476 5.23 Episode VII
1477 THE FUZZ AWAKENS
1478
1479 It is a period of
1480 unrest as separatists
1481 announce their intentions
1482 to fork PERL and return the
1483 galaxy to speed and stability.
1484
1485 Chancellor Rik Hoolian struggles
1486 to hold together the remains of the
1487 once mighty Republic against a tide of
1488 incivility and the depredations of a new
1489 foe, the FUZZ RAIDERS.
1490
1491 Meanwhile, after 15 years of preparation and
1492 high expectations, Supreme Leader Toady prepares
1493 to unleash a devastating new weapon, PERL SIXDOTOH,
1494 that could splinter the Republic forever and usher in
1495 a new Empire of gradual typing....
1496
37204b57
A
1497=head2 v5.23.5 - utastro!nather (Ed Nather), "The Story of Mel", in net.jokes, May 21, 1983.
1498
1499L<Announced on 2015-11-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/11/msg232758.html>
1500
1501After Mel had left the company for greener pa$ture$, the Big Boss asked
1502me to look at the code and see if I could find the test and reverse it.
1503Somewhat reluctantly, I agreed to look. Tracking Mel's code was a real
1504adventure.
1505
1506I have often felt that programming is an art form, whose real value can
1507only be appreciated by another versed in the same arcane art; there are
1508lovely gems and brilliant coups hidden from human view and admiration,
1509sometimes forever, by the very nature of the process. You can learn a
1510lot about an individual just by reading through his code, even in
1511hexadecimal. Mel was, I think, an unsung genius.
1512
1513Perhaps my greatest shock came when I found an innocent loop that had
1514no test in it. No test. None. Common sense said it had to be a closed
1515loop, where the program would circle, forever, endlessly. Program
1516control passed right through it, however, and safely out the other side.
1517It took me two weeks to figure it out.
1518
1519The RPC-4000 computer had a really modern facility called an index
1520register. It allowed the programmer to write a program loop that used
1521an indexed instruction inside; each time through, the number in the
1522index register was added to the address of that instruction, so it
1523would refer to the next datum in a series. He had only to increment
1524the index register each time through. Mel never used it.
1525
1526Instead, he would pull the instruction into a machine register, add one
1527to its address, and store it back. He would then execute the modified
1528instruction right from the register. The loop was written so this
1529additional execution time was taken into account -- just as this
1530instruction finished, the next one was right under the drum's read head,
1531ready to go. But the loop had no test in it.
1532
1533The vital clue came when I noticed the index register bit, the bit that
1534lay between the address and the operation code in the instruction word,
1535was turned on -- yet Mel never used the index register, leaving it zero
1536all the time. When the light went on it nearly blinded me.
1537
1538He had located the data he was working on near the top of memory -- the
1539largest locations the instructions could address -- so, after the last
1540datum was handled, incrementing the instruction address would make it
1541overflow. The carry would add one to the operation code, changing it to
1542the next one in the instruction set: a jump instruction. Sure enough,
1543the next program instruction was in address location zero, and the
1544program went happily on its way.
1545
f8f2c42b
SH
1546=head2 v5.23.4 - Denis Diderot, trans. David Coward, "Jacques the Fatalist"
1547
1548L<Announced on 2015-10-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/10/msg232040.html>
1549
1550Well, everybody's got a dog. The prime minister is the king's dog. The
1551first secretary is the prime minister's dog. A wife is a husband's dog,
1552or a husband is a wife's dog. Favourite is Madame So-and-so's dog and
1553Thibaut is the man on the corner's dog. When my Master tells me to talk
1554when I'd prefer not to, which to be honest doesn't happen very often,
1555when he tells me to shut up when I feel like talking, which I find very
1556difficult, when he asks me to tell the story of my love-life and then
1557keeps interrupting, what am I if not his dog? Weak men are the dogs of
1558strong men.
1559
0e9baca6
PM
1560=head2 v5.23.3 - Oliver Wendell Holmes, "The Deacon’s Masterpiece or The Wonderful 'One-Hoss Shay': A Logical Story"
1561
1562L<Announced on 2015-09-20 by Peter Martini|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/09/msg231173.html>
1563
1564 Little of of all we value here
1565 Wakes on the morn of its hundredth year
1566 Without both feeling and looking queer.
1567 In fact, there’s nothing that keeps its youth,
1568 So far as I know, but a tree and truth.
1569 (This is a moral that runs at large;
1570 Take it. — You’re welcome. — No extra charge.)
1571
6687d205
MH
1572=head2 v5.23.2 - Blind Guardian, "Skalds and Shadows"
1573
4442630f 1574L<Announced on 2015-08-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/08/msg230298.html>
6687d205
MH
1575
1576 Would you believe in a night like this
1577 A night like this, when visions come true
1578 Would you believe in a tale like this
1579 A lay of bliss, praise in the old lore
1580 Come to the blazing fire and
1581
1582 See me in the shadows
1583 See me in the shadows
1584 Songs I will sing
1585 Of runes and rings
1586 Just hand me my harp
1587 This night turns into myth
1588 Nothing seems real
1589 You soon will feel
1590 The world we live in is another skald's
1591 Dream in the shadows
1592 Dream in the shadows
1593
1594 Do you believe there is sense in it
1595 Is it truth or myth?
1596 They´re one in my rhymes
1597 Nobody knows the meaning behind
1598 The weaver's line
1599 Well nobody else but the Norns can
1600 See through the blazing fires of time and
1601 All things will proceed as the
1602 Child of the hallowed
1603 Will speak to you now
1604
1605 See me in the shadows
1606 See me in the shadows
1607 Songs I will sing of tribes and kings
1608 The carrion bird and the hall of the slain
1609 Nothing seems real
1610 You soon will feel
1611 The world we live in is another skald´s
1612 Dream in the shadows
1613 Dream in the shadows
1614
1615 Do not fear for my reason
1616 There's nothing to hide
1617 How bitter your treason
1618 How bitter the lie
1619 Remember the runes and remember the light
1620 All I ever want is to be at your side
1621 We'll gladden the raven now I will
1622 Run through the blazing fires
1623 That's my choice
1624 Cause things shall proceed as foreseen
1625
904c4cac
MH
1626=head2 v5.23.1 - Elizabeth Haydon, "The Assassin King"
1627
1628L<Announced on 2015-07-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/07/msg229413.html>
1629
1630 I was born beneath this willow,
1631 Where my sire the earth did farm
1632 Had the green grass as my pillow
1633 The east wind as a blanket warm.
1634
1635 But away! away! called the wind from the west
1636 And in answer I did run
1637 Seeking glory and adventure
1638 Promised by the rising sun.
1639
1640 I found love beneath this willow,
1641 As true a love as life could hold,
1642 Pledged my heart and swore my fealty
1643 Sealed with a kiss and a band of gold.
1644
1645 But to arms! to arms! called the wind from the west
1646 In faithful answer I did run
1647 Marching forth for king and country
1648 In battles 'neath the midday sun.
1649
1650 Oft I dreamt of that fair willow
1651 As the seven seas I plied
1652 And the girl who I left waiting
1653 Longing to be at her side.
1654
1655 But about! about! called the wind from the west
1656 As once again my ship did run
1657 Down the coast, about the wide world
1658 Flying sails in the setting sun.
1659
1660 Now I lie beneath the willow
1661 Now at last no more to roam,
1662 My bride and earth so tightly hold me
1663 In their arms I'm finally home.
1664
1665 While away! away! calls the wind from the west
1666 Beyond the grave my spirit, free
1667 Will chase the sun into the morning
1668 Beyond the sky, beyond the sea.
1669
da44b70c 1670=head2 v5.23.0 - Bob Dylan, "Maggie's Farm"
904c4cac
MH
1671
1672L<Announced on 2015-06-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/06/msg228807.html>
1673
1674 I ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more
1675 I ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more
1676 Well, I try my best
1677 To be just like I am
1678 But everybody wants you
1679 To be just like them
1680 They sing while you slave and I just get bored
1681 I ain't gonna work on Maggie's farm no more
1682
44f2f7ec
SH
1683=head2 v5.22.4 - Roald Dahl, "Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf"
1684
1685L<Announced on 2017-07-15 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/07/msg245526.html>
1686
1687 Then Little Red Riding Hood said, 'But Grandma,
1688 what a lovely great big furry coat you have on.'
1689 'That's wrong!' cried Wolf. 'Have you forgot
1690 'To tell me what BIG TEETH I've got?
1691 'Ah well, no matter what you say,
1692 'I'm going to eat you anyway.'
1693 The small girl smiles. One eyelid flickers.
1694 She whips a pistol from her knickers.
1695 She aims it at the creature's head
1696 And bang bang bang, she shoots him dead.
1697
1698 A few weeks later, in the wood,
1699 I came across Miss Riding Hood.
1700 But what a change! No cloak of red,
1701 No silly hood upon her head.
1702 She said, 'Hello, and do please note
1703 'My lovely furry WOLFSKIN COAT.'
1704
19eecef8
SH
1705=head2 v5.22.4-RC1 - Roald Dahl, "Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf"
1706
1707L<Announced on 2017-07-01 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/07/msg245293.html>
1708
1709 As soon as Wolf began to feel
1710 That he would like a decent meal,
1711 He went and knocked on Grandma's door.
1712 When Grandma opened it, she saw
1713 The sharp white teeth, the horrid grin,
1714 And Wolfie said, 'May I come in?'
1715 Poor Grandmamma was terrified,
1716 'He's going to eat me up!' she cried.
1717 And she was absolutely right.
1718 He ate her up in one big bite.
1719
a016fa10
SH
1720=head2 v5.22.3 - Charles Dodgson [as "Lewis Carroll"], "Phantasmagoria", Canto 6: Discomfyture
1721
1722L<Announced on 2017-01-14 by Steve Hay|https://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/01/msg242258.html>
1723
1724 As one who strives a hill to climb,
1725 Who never climbed before:
1726 Who finds it, in a little time,
1727 Grow every moment less sublime,
1728 And votes the thing a bore:
1729
1730 Yet, having once begun to try,
1731 Dares not desert his quest,
1732 But, climbing, ever keeps his eye
1733 On one small hut against the sky
1734 Wherein he hopes to rest:
1735
1736 Who climbs till nerve and force are spent,
1737 With many a puff and pant:
1738 Who still, as rises the ascent,
1739 In language grows more violent,
1740 Although in breath more scant:
1741
1742 Who, climbing, gains at length the place
1743 That crowns the upward track:
1744 And, entering with unsteady pace,
1745 Receives a buffet in the face
1746 That lands him on his back:
1747
1748 And feels himself, like one in sleep,
1749 Glide swiftly down again,
1750 A helpless weight, from steep to steep,
1751 Till, with a headlong giddy sweep,
1752 He drops upon the plain -
1753
1754 So I, that had resolved to bring
1755 Conviction to a ghost,
1756 And found it quite a different thing
1757 From any human arguing,
1758 Yet dared not quit my post.
1759
87bac28f
SH
1760=head2 v5.22.3-RC5 - John Milton, ed. Gordon Campbell, "Paradise Regained", Book II
1761
1762L<Announced on 2017-01-02 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2017/01/msg242017.html>
1763
1764 Thus wore out night; and now the herald lark
1765 Left his ground-nest, high towering to descry
1766 The Morn's approach, and greet her with his song;
1767 As lightly from his grassy couch up rose
1768 Our Saviour, and found all was but a dream;
1769 Fasting he went to sleep, and fasting waked.
1770 Up to a hill anon his steps he reared,
1771 From whose high top to ken the prospect round,
1772 If cottage were in view, sheep-cote, or herd;
1773 But cottage, herd, or sheep-cote, none he saw --
1774 Only in a bottom saw a pleasant grove,
1775 With chant of tuneful birds resounding loud;
1776 Thither he bent his way, determined there
1777 To rest at noon, and entered soon the shade,
1778 High-roofed and walks beneath, and alleys brown,
1779 That opened in the midst a woody scene;
1780 Nature's own work it seemed (Nature taught Art),
1781 And, to a superstitious eye, the haunt
1782 Of wood-gods and wood-nymphs.
1783
8c805412
SH
1784=head2 v5.22.3-RC4 - John Milton, ed. Gordon Campbell, "Paradise Lost", Book II
1785
1786L<Announced on 2016-10-12 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/10/msg240223.html>
1787
1788 Far off from these, a slow and silent stream,
1789 Lethe, the river of oblivion, rolls
1790 Her watery labyrinth, whereof who drinks
1791 Forthwith his former state and being forgets --
1792 Forgets both joy and grief, pleasure and pain.
1793 Beyond this flood a frozen continent
1794 Lies dark and wild, beat with perpetual storms
1795 Of Whirlwind and dire hail, which on firm land
1796 Thaws not, but gathers heap, and ruin seems
1797 Of ancient pile; all else deep snow and ice,
1798 A gulf profound as that Serbonian bog
1799 Betwixt Damiata and Mount Casius old,
1800 Where armies whole have sunk: the parching air
1801 Burns frore, and cold performs the effect of fire.
1802 Thither, by harpy-footed Furies haled,
1803 At certain revolutions all the damned
1804 Are brought; and feel by turns the bitter change
1805 Of fierce extremes, extremes by change more fierce,
1806 From beds of raging fire to starve in ice
1807 Their soft ethereal warmth, and there to pine
1808 Immovable, infixed, and frozen round
1809 Periods of time -- thence hurried back to fire.
1810 They ferry over this Lethean sound
1811 Both to and fro, their sorrow to augment,
1812 And wish and struggle, as they pass, to reach
1813 The tempting stream, with one small drop to lose
1814 In sweet forgetfulness all pain and woe,
1815 All in one moment, and so near the brink;
1816 But fate withstands, and, to oppose the attempt,
1817 Medusa with Gorgonian terror guards
1818 The ford, and of itself the water flies
1819 All taste of living wight, as once it fled
1820 The lip of Tantalus.
1821
80a17ed4
SH
1822=head2 v5.22.3-RC3 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers and Barbara Reynolds, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica III: Paradise, Canto IV
1823
1824L<Announced on 2016-08-11 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/08/msg238908.html>
1825
1826 Between two dishes, equally attractive
1827 And near to him, a free man, I suppose,
1828 Would starve to death before his teeth got active;
1829
1830 So would a lamb 'twixt two fierce wolfish foes,
1831 Fearing the fangs both ways, not stir a foot;
1832 So would a deerhound halt between two does;
1833
1834 So I can't blame myself for standing mute,
1835 Nor praise myself: for I must needs so do,
1836 Suspended 'twixt two doubts, alike acute.
1837
9648eab6
SH
1838=head2 v5.22.3-RC2 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica II: Purgatory, Canto I
1839
1840L<Announced on 2016-07-25 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/07/msg238270.html>
1841
1842 For better waters heading with the wind
1843 My ship of genius now shakes out her sail
1844 And leaves that ocean of despair behind;
1845
1846 For to the second realm I tune my tale,
1847 Where human spirits purge themselves, and train
1848 To leap up into joy celestial.
1849
1850 Now from the grave wake poetry again,
1851 O sacred Muses I have served so long!
1852 Now let Calliope uplift her strain
1853
1854 And lift my voice up on the mighty song
1855 That smote the miserable Magpies nine
1856 Out of all hope of pardon for their wrong!
1857
3a6ace9d
SH
1858=head2 v5.22.3-RC1 - Dante Alighieri, trans. Dorothy L. Sayers, "The Divine Comedy", Cantica I: Hell, Canto XII
1859
1860L<Announced on 2016-07-17 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/07/msg238071.html>
1861
1862 The place we came to, to descend the brink from,
1863 Was sheer crag; and there was a Thing there - making,
1864 All told, a prospect any eye would shrink from.
1865
1866 Like the great landslide that rushed downward, shaking
1867 The bank of Adige on this side Trent,
1868 (Whether through faulty shoring or the earth's quaking)
1869
1870 So that the rock, down from the summit rent
1871 Far as the plain, lies strewn, and one might crawl
1872 From top to bottom by that unsure descent,
1873
1874 Such was the precipice; and there we spied,
1875 Topping the cleft that split the rocky wall,
1876 That which was wombed in the false heifer's side,
1877
1878 The infamy of Crete, stretched out a-sprawl;
1879 And seeing us, he gnawed himself, like one
1880 Inly devoured with spite and burning gall.
1881
73cf5d5a
SH
1882=head2 v5.22.2 - Gaston Leroux, trans. Mireille Ribière, "The Phantom of the Opera"
1883
1884L<Announced on 2016-04-29 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/04/msg236120.html>
1885
1886A silence; and then: 'If, in just two minutes' time by my watch--and a
1887splendid watch it is--you have not turned the scorpion, mademoiselle, I
1888shall turn the grasshopper... and the grasshopper, remember, _leaps
1889straight up into the air!_'
1890The silence that ensued was terrifying, worse than any we had
1891experienced before. I knew that when Erik spoke with that quiet,
1892gentle, slightly weary voice, it meant that he had reached the end of
1893his tether: that he was capable of the most abominable crimes or the
1894most selfless devotion; that the slightest irritation might unleash a
1895storm.
1896Realizing that our fate was out of our hands, the Viscount fell to his
1897knees and prayed. As for me, I pressed both hands to my chest, for my
1898heart was pounding so fiercely that I thought it would burst. We were
1899intensely aware of the excruciating dilemma Christine Daaé faced in
1900those final seconds. We understood why she hesitated to turn the
1901scorpion. What if the scorpion, rather than the grasshopper, were to
1902set off the explosion? What if Erik was simply intent on destroying
1903everything, regardless?
1904At last he spoke: 'The two minutes are up,' he said in a soft, angelic
1905voice. 'Goodbye, mademoiselle. Off you go, little grasshopper!'
1906
bdd099cd
SH
1907=head2 v5.22.2-RC1 - Gaston Leroux, trans. Mireille Ribière, "The Phantom of the Opera"
1908
1909L<Announced on 2016-04-10 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2016/04/msg235732.html>
1910
1911This annual ball was quite a magnificent affair. It was given some time
1912before Shrovetide to celebrate the birthday of a famous illustrator
1913whose pencil had immortalized, in the style of Gavarni, the extravagant
1914carnival parade down La Courtille. As such, the ball was an altogether
1915merrier, noisier and more Bohemian occasion than was usual for a masked
1916ball. Many artists had arranged to meet there; they arrived with an
1917entourage of models and pupils, who, by midnight, had become quite
1918boisterous.
1919Raoul climbed the grand staircase at five minutes to midnight. He did
1920not linger to admire the many-coloured costumes on display all the way
1921up the marble steps of one of the most luxurious settings in the world;
1922nor did he allow himself to be drawn into the facetious conversation of
1923masked guests. He simply ignored all the jesting remarks, and shook off
1924the attentions of several all too merry couples.
1925Crossing the big crush-room and escaping from the dancers' farandole
1926that had encircled him awhile, he at last entered the salon mentioned by
1927Christine in her letter. The small room was crammed with people either
1928on their way to supper at the restaurant in the Rotunda or back from
1929raising a glass of champagne.
1930In the midst of the gay and lively hubbub, Raoul thought that, for their
1931mysterious assignation, Christine must have preferred this crowd to some
1932lonely corner.
1933He leaned against a door-jamb and waited. He did not have to wait long;
1934a black domino passed him and deftly touched his hand. He understood
1935that it was Christine and followed her.
1936'Is that you, Christine?' he murmured, barely moving his slips.
1937The black domino promptly looked back and raised her finger to her lips,
1938no doubt to caution him against uttering her name again. Raoul followed
1939on in silence.
1940
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SH
1941=head2 v5.22.1 - Wilhelm Müller, trans. Anon., "Courage" (No. 22 in Schubert's song-cycle, "Winterreise")
1942
1943L<Announced on 2015-12-13 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/12/msg233318.html>
1944
1945 If the snow flies in my face,
1946 Let me shake it off me!
1947 If my heart within me speaks,
1948 I'll sing bright and gaily!
1949
1950 Will not listen what it says,
1951 Have no ears for moaning.
1952 Do not feel what it complains,--
1953 Only fools like groaning!
1954
1955 Jolly brave into the world,
1956 'Gainst all wind and weather,--
1957 If there is no God on earth,
1958 Let 's be gods down nether!
1959
73e3ba06
SH
1960=head2 v5.22.1-RC4 - Wilhelm Müller, trans. Anon., "The Signpost" (No. 20 in Schubert's song-cycle, "Winterreise")
1961
1962L<Announced on 2015-12-08 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/12/msg233215.html>
1963
1964 Why do I shun all those highways
1965 Which the other wanderer seeks?
1966 Why do I find bridged by-ways
1967 Through snow-covered deep creeks?
1968
1969 For I have no crime committed,
1970 Why I should now run from men,--
1971 What demented heart's desire
1972 Drives me to a desert glen?
1973
1974 Signposts on all highways stationed
1975 Point their signs toward the towns,
1976 Whilst I wonder 'yond moderation,
1977 Without rest, yet seeking rest!
1978
1979 One such signpost I see planted
1980 Of my question unconcerned,
1981 One road must my choice be granted,
1982 Whence no man has yet returned!
1983
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SH
1984=head2 v5.22.1-RC3 - Wilhelm Müller, trans. Anon., "Stormy Morning" (No. 18 in Schubert's song-cycle, "Winterreise")
1985
1986L<Announced on 2015-12-02 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/12/msg233032.html>
1987
1988 How the storm tore rents
1989 In heavens gray attired!
1990 The rags of cloud are flying
1991 Around, of combat tired.
1992
1993 And flames of fire lambent,
1994 Fly between them and part,
1995 That 's what I call a morning,
1996 A morning after my heart!
1997
1998 My heart sees in the heavens
1999 Its own picture unspoilt--
2000 It's nothing but the Winter,
2001 The Winter, cold and wild.
2002
02c981b8
SH
2003=head2 v5.22.1-RC2 - Wilhelm Müller, trans. Anon., "The Old Head" (No. 14 in Schubert's song-cycle, "Winterreise")
2004
2005L<Announced on 2015-11-15 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/11/msg232632.html>
2006
2007 The hoary frost has a white sheen
2008 Strewn all over my hair,
2009 So I thought I was an old man
2010 And thought life dealt me fair.
2011
2012 Yet soon was thawed my old white mane,
2013 And I have my black hair again.
2014 How I abhor my young fair years,
2015 How long to wait for death and biers?
2016
2017 From setting sun to morning's hue
2018 Many a head turns white.
2019 Who'll credit it? My hair did not
2020 In all this lifelong plight!
2021
ad307f47
SH
2022=head2 v5.22.1-RC1 - Wilhelm Müller, trans. Anon., "Will-o'-the Wisp" (No. 9 in Schubert's song-cycle, "Winterreise")
2023
2024L<Announced on 2015-10-31 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/10/msg232321.html>
2025
2026 In the deepest rocky crevice
2027 A will-o'-the wisp lured me;
2028 How I could find my way from here,
2029 For me it's easy memory!
2030
2031 For I am used to straying ways,
2032 Every path to th'end a way,
2033 All our joys and all our suffering,--
2034 To a will-o'-the wisp it 's all play!
2035
2036 Through the dried-up bed of torrents
2037 I quite calmly downward stroll;
2038 Every stream its sea will enter,
2039 Every suffering finds its goal!
2040
4e3e12f8
RS
2041=head2 v5.22.0 - Gene Wolfe, The Citadel of the Autarch
2042
2043L<Announced on 2015-06-01 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/06/msg228300.html>
2044
2045“You are the advocate of the dead.”
2046
2047The old man nodded. “I am. People talk about being fair to this one and
2048that one, but nobody I ever heard talks about doing right by them. We
2049take everything they had, which is all right. And spit, most often, on
2050their opinions, which I suppose is all right too. But we ought to
2051remember now and then how much of what we have we got from them. I
2052figure while I’m still here I ought to put a word in for them.”
2053
82b39489
RS
2054=head2 v5.22.0-RC2 - T.S. Eliot, unpublished work
2055
2056L<Announced on 2015-05-21 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/05/msg228142.html>
2057
2058 And when thyself with silver foot shall pass
2059 Among the theories scattered on the grass
2060 Take up my good intentions with the rest
2061
2062=head2 v5.22.0-RC1 - Gene Wolfe, Citadel of the Autarch
2063
2064L<Announced on 2015-05-19 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/05/msg228059.html>
2065
2066There is no limit to stupidity. Space itself is said to be bounded by
2067its own curvature, but stupidity continues beyond infinity.
2068
9ba8eca3
SH
2069=head2 v5.21.11 - Algernon Charles Swinburne, "Dolores (Notre-Dame des Sept Douleurs)"
2070
2071L<Announced on 2015-04-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/04/msg227472.html>
2072
2073 They shall pass and their places be taken,
2074 The gods and the priests that are pure.
2075 They shall pass, and shalt thou not be shaken?
2076 They shall perish, and shalt thou endure?
2077 Death laughs, breathing close and relentless
2078 In the nostrils and eyelids of lust,
2079 With a pinch in his fingers of scentless
2080 And delicate dust.
2081
2082 But the worm shall revive thee with kisses;
2083 Thou shalt change and transmute as a god,
2084 As the rod to a serpent that hisses,
2085 As the serpent again to a rod.
2086 Thy life shall not cease though thou doff it;
2087 Thou shalt live until evil be slain,
2088 And good shall die first, said thy prophet,
2089 Our Lady of Pain.
2090
c8d2be4d
SH
2091=head2 v5.21.10 - Aldous Huxley, "The Devils of Loudun"
2092
2093L<Announced on 2015-03-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/03/msg226847.html>
2094
2095The fire burned on, the good fathers continued to sprinkle and intone.
2096Suddenly a flock of pigeons came swooping down from the church and
2097started to wheel around the roaring column of flame and smoke. The
2098crowd shouted, the archers waved their halberds at the birds, Lactance
2099and Tranquille splashed them on the wing with holy water. In vain. The
2100pigeons were not to be driven away. Round and round they flew, diving
2101through the smoke, singeing their feathers in the flames. Both parties
2102claimed a miracle. For the parson's enemies the birds, quite obviously,
2103were a troop of devils, come to fetch away his soul. For his friends,
2104they were emblems of the Holy Ghost and living proof of his innocence.
2105It never seems to have occurred to anyone that they were just pigeons,
2106obeying the laws of their own, their blessedly other-than-human nature.
2107
94fa4f56
S
2108=head2 v5.21.9 - Emily Dickinson, "There is Another Sky"
2109
c8d2be4d 2110L<Announced on 2015-02-20 by Sawyer X|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/02/msg226002.html>
94fa4f56 2111
e5f16b09
SH
2112 There is another sky,
2113 Ever serene and fair,
2114 And there is another sunshine,
2115 Though it be darkness there;
2116 Never mind faded forests, Austin,
2117 Never mind silent fields -
2118 Here is a little forest,
2119 Whose leaf is ever green;
2120 Here is a brighter garden,
2121 Where not a frost has been;
2122 In its unfading flowers
2123 I hear the bright bee hum:
2124 Prithee, my brother,
2125 Into my garden come!
94fa4f56 2126
8917c25b
MH
2127=head2 v5.21.8 - Bill Watterson, "Scientific Progress Goes 'Boink': A Calvin and Hobbes Collection"
2128
06dcbead 2129L<Announced on 2015-01-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/01/msg224869.html>
8917c25b
MH
2130
2131Calvin: OK Hobbes, press the button and duplicate me.
2132Hobbes: Are you sure this is such a good idea?
2133Calvin: Brother! You doubting Thomases get in the way of more scientific advances with your stupid ethical questions! This is a *BRILLIANT* idea! Hit the button, will ya?
2134Hobbes: I'd hate to be accused of inhibiting scientific progress... Here you go.
2135[Box]: *BOINK*
2136Hobbes: Scientific progress goes "BOINK"?
2137Calvin?: It worked! It worked! I'm a genius!
2138Cavlin??: No you're not, you liar! *I* invented this!
2139
2ee7da68 2140=head2 v5.21.7 - Robert Heinlein, "The Number of the Beast"
d171d861
MM
2141
2142L<Announced on 2014-12-20 by Max Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/12/msg223774.html>
2143
4ed12d4a
SH
2144"Zebadiah, Hilda and I salvaged and put everything into the basket.
2145Hilda started to put it into our wardrobe-and it was heavy. So
2146we looked. Packed as tight as when we left Oz. Six bananas-and
2147everything else. Cross my heart. No, go look."
2148"Hmmm- Jake, can you write equations for a picnic basket that
2149refills itself? Will it go on doing so?"
2150"Zeb, equations can be written to describe anything. The description
2151would be simpler for a basket that replenishes itself indefinitely
2152than for one that does it once and stops-I would have to describe
2153the discontinuity."
d171d861 2154
2ee7da68 2155=head2 v5.21.6 - Jeff Noon, "Vurt"
11741df4
CBW
2156
2157L<Announced on 2014-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/11/msg222448.html>
2158
4ed12d4a
SH
2159GAME CAT
2160
2161EXCHANGE MECHANISMS. Sometimes we lose precious
2162things. Friends and colleagues, fellow travellers in the
2163Vurt, sometimes we lose them; even lovers we sometimes
2164lose. And get bad things in exchange: aliens, objects,
2165snakes, and sometimes even death. Things we don't want.
2166This is part of the deal, part of the game deal;
2167all things, in all worlds, must be kept in balance.
2168Kittlings often ask, who decides on the swappings? Now then,
2169some say it's all accidental; that some poor Vurt thing
2170finds himself too close to a door, at too critical a time,
2171just when something real is being lost. Whoosh! Swap time!
2172Others say that some kind of overseer is working the
2173MECHANISMS OF EXCHANGE, deciding the fate of innocents.
2174The Cat can only tease at this, because of the big secrets
2175involved, and because of the levels between you, the reader,
2176and me, the Game Cat. Hey, listen; I've struggled to get
2177where I am today; why should I give you the easy route?
2178Get working, kittlings! Reach up higher. Work the Vurt.
11741df4 2179
2ee7da68 2180=head2 v5.21.5 - Friso Wiegersma (text), Jean Ferrat (music), Wim Sonneveld (performer), "Het Dorp"
b22c1b06
A
2181
2182L<Announced on 2014-10-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/10/msg221399.html>
2183
2184 Het Dorp
2185
2186 Thuis heb ik nog een ansichtkaart
2187 waarop een kerk, een kar met paard,
2188 een slagerij J. van der Ven.
2189 Een kroeg, een juffrouw op de fiets
2190 het zegt u hoogstwaarschijnlijk niets,
2191 maar 't is waar ik geboren ben.
2192 Dit dorp, ik weet nog hoe het was,
2193 de boerenkind'ren in de klas,
2194 een kar die ratelt op de keien,
2195 het raadhuis met een pomp ervoor,
2196 een zandweg tussen koren door,
11741df4 2197 het vee, de boerderijen.
b22c1b06
A
2198
2199 En langs het tuinpad van m'n vader
2200 zag ik de hoge bomen staan.
2201 Ik was een kind en wist niet beter,
11741df4 2202 dan dat dat nooit voorbij zou gaan.
b22c1b06
A
2203
2204 Wat leefden ze eenvoudig toen
2205 in simp'le huizen tussen groen
2206 met boerenbloemen en een heg.
2207 Maar blijkbaar leefden ze verkeerd,
2208 het dorp is gemoderniseerd
2209 en nu zijn ze op de goeie weg.
2210 Want ziet, hoe rijk het leven is,
2211 ze zien de televisiequiz
2212 en wonen in betonnen dozen,
2213 met flink veel glas, dan kun je zien
2214 hoe of het bankstel staat bij Mien
2215 en d'r dressoir met plastic rozen.
2216
2217 En langs het tuinpad van m'n vader
2218 zag ik de hoge bomen staan.
2219 Ik was een kind en wist niet beter,
11741df4 2220 dan dat dat nooit voorbij zou gaan.
b22c1b06
A
2221
2222 De dorpsjeugd klit wat bij elkaar
2223 in minirok en beatle-haar
2224 en joelt wat mee met beat-muziek.
2225 Ik weet wel, het is hun goeie recht,
2226 de nieuwe tijd, net wat u zegt,
2227 maar het maakt me wat melancholiek.
2228 Ik heb hun vaders nog gekend
2229 ze kochten zoethout voor een cent
2230 ik zag hun moeders touwtjespringen.
2231 Dat dorp van toen, het is voorbij,
2232 dit is al wat er bleef voor mij:
2233 een ansicht en herinneringen.
2234
2235 Toen ik langs het tuinpad van m'n vader
2236 de hoge bomen nog zag staan.
2237 Ik was een kind, hoe kon ik weten
2238 dat dat voorgoed voorbij zou gaan.
2239
2ee7da68 2240=head2 v5.21.4 - Edgar Allan Poe, "The Narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym of Nantucket"
28c2c58f
SH
2241
2242L<Announced on 2014-09-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg220267.html>
2243
4ed12d4a
SH
2244To-day, being in latitude 83° 20', longitude 43° 5' W. (the sea being
2245of an extraordinarily dark colour), we again saw land from the
2246masthead, and, upon a closer scrutiny, found it to be one of a group
2247of very large islands. The shore was precipitous, and the interior
2248seemed to be well wooded, a circumstance which occasioned us great
2249joy. In about four hours from our first discovering the land we came
2250to anchor in ten fathoms, sandy bottom, a league from the coast, as a
2251high surf, with strong ripples here and there, rendered a nearer
2252approach of doubtful expediency. The two largest boats were now
2253ordered out, and a party, well armed (among whome were Peters and
2254myself), proceeded to look for an opening in the reef which appeared
2255to encircle the island. After searching about for some time, we
2256discovered an inlet, which we were entering, when we saw four large
2257canoes put off from the shore, filled with men who seemed to be well
2258armed. We waited for them to come up, and, as they moved with great
2259rapidity, they were soon within hail. Captain Guy now held up a white
2260handkerchief on the blade of an oar, when the strangers made a full
2261stop, and commenced a loud jabbering all at once, intermingled with
2262occasional shouts, in which we could distinguish the words Anamoo-moo!
2263and Lama-Lama! They continued this for at least half an hour, during
2264which we had a good opportunity of observing their appearance.
28c2c58f 2265
c682aa67
SH
2266=head2 v5.21.3 - Robert Service, "The Men that Don't Fit In"
2267
2268L<Announced on 2014-08-20 by Peter Martini|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/08/msg218826.html>
2269
2270 If they just went straight they might go far,
2271 They are strong and brave and true;
2272 But they're always tired of the things that are,
2273 And they want the strange and new.
2274 They say: "Could I find my proper groove,
2275 What a deep mark I would make!"
2276 So they chop and change, and each fresh move
2277 Is only a fresh mistake.
2278
2279=head2 v5.21.2 - Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin, Charlie Duke, Final minutes of communication of the first manned moon landing, July 20, 1969
2280
2281L<Announced on 2014-07-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/07/msg217937.html>
2282
2283 Armstrong: Okay. Here's a...Looks like a good area here.
2284 Aldrin: I got the shadow out there.
2285 Aldrin: 250, down at 2 1/2, 19 forward.
2286 Aldrin: Altitude, velocity lights.
2287 Aldrin: 3 1/2 down, 220 feet, 13 forward.
2288 Aldrin: 11 forward. Coming down nicely.
2289 Armstrong: Gonna be right over that crater.
2290 Aldrin: 200 feet, 4 1/2 down.
2291 Aldrin: 5 1/2 down.
2292 Armstrong: I got a good spot [garbled].
2293 Aldrin: 160 feet, 6 1/2 down.
2294 Aldrin: 5 1/2 down, 9 forward. You're looking good.
2295 Aldrin: 120 feet.
2296 Aldrin: 100 feet, 3 1/2 down, 9 forward. Five percent. Quantity light.
2297 Aldrin: Okay. 75 feet. And it's looking good. Down a half, 6 forward.
2298 Duke: 60 seconds.
2299 Aldrin: Light's on.
2300 Aldrin: 60 feet, down 2 1/2. 2 forward. 2 forward. That's good.
2301 Aldrin: 40 feet, down 2 1/2. Picking up some dust.
2302 Aldrin: 30 feet, 2 1/2 down. [Garbled] shadow.
2303 Aldrin: 4 forward. 4 forward. Drifting to the right a little. 20 feet,
2304 down a half.
2305 Duke: 30 seconds.
2306 Aldrin: Drifting forward just a little bit; that's good.
2307 Aldrin: Contact Light.
2308 Armstrong: Shutdown.
2309 Aldrin: Okay. Engine Stop.
2310 Aldrin: ACA out of Detent.
2311 Armstrong: Out of Detent. Auto.
2312 Aldrin: Mode Control, both Auto. Descent Engine Command Override, Off.
2313 Engine Arm, Off. 413 is in.
2314 Duke: We copy you down, Eagle.
2315 Armstrong: Engine arm is off.
2316 Armstrong: Houston, Tranquility Base here. The Eagle has landed.
2317 Duke: Roger, Twan...[correcting himself] Tranquility. We copy you on
2318 the ground. You got a bunch of guys about to turn blue.
2319 We're breathing again. Thanks a lot.
2320 Aldrin: Thank you.
2321
2322=head2 v5.21.1 - Robert Jordan, "The Crossroads of Twilights", Book 10 of "The Wheel of Time"
2323
2324L<Announced on 2014-06-20 by Matthew Horsfall|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/06/msg217030.html>
2325
2326 We rode on the winds of the rising storm,
2327 We ran to the sounds of the thunder.
2328 We danced among the lightning bolts,
2329 and tore the world asunder.
2330
2331 -- Anonymous fragment of a poem believed
2332 written near the end of the previous Age,
2333 known by some as the Third Age.
2334 Sometimes attributed to the Dragon
2335 Reborn.
2336
2337=head2 v5.21.0 - Friedrich von Schiller, "The Song of the Bell"
2338
2339L<Announced on 2014-05-27 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/05/msg215826.html>
2340
2341 Walled in fast within the earth
2342 Stands the form burnt out of clay.
2343 This must be the bell’s great birth!
2344 Fellows, lend a hand to-day.
2345 Sweat must trickle now
2346 From the burning brow,
2347 Till the work its master honour.
2348 Blessing comes from Heaven’s Donor.
2349
f483a002
SH
2350=head2 v5.20.3 - Elias Lönnrot, trans. Keith Bosley, "The Kalevala", Canto 42: Stealing the Sampo
2351
2352L<Announced on 2015-09-12 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/09/msg230945.html>
2353
2354 Steady old Väinämöinen
2355 uttered a word and spoke thus:
2356 'No lilting on the waters
2357 and no singing on the waves!
2358 Song keeps you lazy
2359 tales delay rowing.
2360 Precious day would pass and night
2361 would overtake us midway
2362 on these wide waters
2363 upon these vast waves.'
2364
2365 The wanton Lemminkäinen
2366 uttered a word and spoke thus:
2367 'The time will pass anyway
2368 the fair day will flee
2369 and the night will come panting
2370 and the twilight will steal in
2371 if you don't sing while you live
2372 nor hum in this world.'
2373
9d05662d
SH
2374=head2 v5.20.3-RC2 - Anon., trans. Malcolm C. Lyons, "The Story of Abu Muhammad the Idle and the Marvels He Encountered with the Ape As Well As the Marvels of the Seas and Islands", from "Tales of the Marvellous and News of the Strange"
2375
2376L<Announced on 2015-08-29 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/08/msg230544.html>
2377
2378'I fled from Basra, sad and tearful, with no idea where I was going,
2379and I was reciting these lines:
2380
2381 The pain of parting makes me melt away,
2382 As lovers do when those they love are harsh.
2383 I wonder at the patience that I showed
2384 When I had lost my love, for that was wonderful.
2385 Beloved, do you know that since you left,
2386 I have remained confused in misery.
2387
2388I then heard a voice that said: "Damn you, have you no fear of
2389Almighty God that you hand over a girl to an unbelieving 'ifrit?" I
2390walked for a time amongst the palm-trees until I caught sight of a
2391person, whom I approached. When I asked him who he was he said: "I
2392am one of the jinn who were converted to Islam at the hands of 'Ali
2393ibn Abi Talib, may God ennoble him." "How can I get to my wife?" I
2394asked him, and he said: "Wretched fellow, you had a bird which you
2395allowed to fly away and now you want to fly after it." But he
2396added: "Follow this road with God's blessing all night until dawn
2397and then by the shore you will see a huge cave in which there is an
2398idol made of white stone. You must drink of the water that there is
2399coming out of the cave and smear your face with its mud. Stay there
2400and a barge will pass you as you stand opposite the statue. Various
2401different creatures will emerge, heads without bodies and bodies
2402without heads, and they will prostrate themselves in adoration to
2403the idol rather than to Almighty God. When you see that, embark on
2404the barge and cross to the other bank and walk along it until
2405sunset. On a high point you will see a castle built of bricks of
2406gold and silver. That is where your 'ifrit will be. I have now
2407told you about this, so goodbye."
2408
1c94dd53
SH
2409=head2 v5.20.3-RC1 - Anon., trans. Malcolm C. Lyons, "The Story of Abu Muhammad the Idle and the Marvels He Encountered with the Ape As Well As the Marvels of the Seas and Islands", from "Tales of the Marvellous and News of the Strange"
2410
2411L<Announced on 2015-08-22 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/08/msg230359.html>
2412
2413'On the night of the wedding the ape came to sit in front of me and
2414asked me what I intended to do. "Whatever you tell me," I replied,
2415and he said: "Take care not to covet the girl, or I shall come back
2416and burn you up and leave you as a lesson for those who can learn."
2417I agreed to this and when evening came I found the world full of
2418candles and torches burning in holders of gold and silver. There
2419were servants and serving girls, and everyone who saw me
2420congratulated me on my good fortune, as there was no girl on the
2421face of the earth more beautiful than my bride.
2422[...]
2423'Next morning I went out to the market, and people went in and asked
2424her how the night had been. "He never looked up at me," she told
2425them. Then, when it was afternoon, I went to my house, where the
2426ape was sitting by the door. "Tell me what you did," it said, and I
2427told it: "By God, I did not learn and do not know whether this was a
2428man or a girl." "That's what I want," it said.
2429[...]
2430'On the second night my bride was brought to me, after which the
2431servants left her and went away. She fell asleep, and, while she
2432was sleeping, I killed the cock, wrapped it in the cloth and put the
2433four poles from the couch over it. Suddenly there was a huge crash
2434like a peal of thunder and a fiery 'ifrit swooped on the girl. I
2435fainted at the sight and when I recovered I heard a voice saying:
2436"By the Lord of the Ka'ba, the girl has been carried off!" and there
2437was a sound like the rustling of wind and bitter weeping. At this I
2438shed tears, struck my head and was filled with regret when it was no
2439longer of any use, for to me the whole world was worth no more than
2440a bean.
2441
61c85015
SH
2442=head2 v5.20.2 - Jonathan "Jonti" Picking, L<"Magical Trevor"|http://www.weebls-stuff.com/other-toons/video/magical-trevor.html>
2443
2444L<Announced on 2015-02-14 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/02/msg225777.html>
2445
2446 Everyone loves Magical Trevor,
2447 'Cos the tricks that he does are ever so clever;
2448 Look at him now, disappearin' the cow,
2449 Where is the cow hidden right now?
2450
2451 Taking a bow, it's Magical Trevor,
2452 Everybody's seen that the trick is clever;
2453 Look at him there with his leathery, leathery whip!
2454 It's made of magic, and with a little flip--
2455
2456 Yeah, yeah, yeah, the cow is back,
2457 Yeah, yeah, yeah, the cow is back;
2458 Back, back, back from his magical journey,
2459 Yeah!
2460
2461 What did he see in the parallel dimension?
2462 He saw beans, lots of beans, lots of beans, lots of beans;
2463 Oh, beans, lots of beans, lots of beans, lots of beans,
2464 Yeah, yeah!
2465
8e0a1bb9
SH
2466=head2 v5.20.2-RC1 - Jonathan "Jonti" Picking, L<"Scampi"|http://www.weebls-stuff.com/other-toons/video/scampi.html>
2467
2468L<Announced on 2015-02-01 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2015/02/msg225273.html>
2469
2470 I've seen things,
2471 I've seen them with my eyes;
2472 I've seen things,
2473 They're often in disguise.
2474
2475 Like carrots, handbags, cheese, toilets,
2476 Russians, planets, hamsters, weddings,
2477 Poets, Stalin, Kuala Lumpur!
2478 Pygmies, budgies, Kuala Lumpur!
2479
2480 I've seen things,
2481 I've seen them with my eyes;
2482 I've seen things,
2483 They're often in disguise.
2484
2485 Like carrots, handbags, cheese...
2486
2ee7da68 2487=head2 v5.20.1 - Lorenzo da Ponte, trans. Diana Reed, "Così fan tutte"
c43e8743
SH
2488
2489L<Announced on 2014-09-14 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg219789.html>
2490
2491 DORABELLA (as if waking from a daze): Where are they?
2492 DON ALFONSO: They've gone.
2493 FIORDILIGI: Oh, the cruel bitterness of parting!
2494
2495 DON ALFONSO:
2496 Take heart, my dearest children.
2497 Look, in the distance, your lovers are waving to you.
2498
2499 FIORDILIGI: Bon voyage, my darling!
2500 DORABELLA: Bon voyage!
2501
2502 FIORDILIGI:
2503 O heavens! How swiftly the ship is sailing away!
2504 It is disappearing already!
2505 It is no longer in sight!
2506 Oh, may heaven grant it a prosperous voyage!
2507
2508 DORABELLA: May good luck attend it to the battlefield!
2509 DON ALFONSO: And may your sweethearts and my friends be safe!
2510
2511 FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA, DON ALFONSO:
2512 May the wind be gentle,
2513 may the sea be calm,
2514 and may the elements
2515 respond kindly
2516 to our wishes.
2517
2ee7da68 2518=head2 v5.20.1-RC2 - Lorenzo da Ponte, trans. William Weaver, "Così fan tutte"
d1da2d57
SH
2519
2520L<Announced on 2014-09-07 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg219446.html>
2521
2522 GUGLIELMO:
2523 Oh God, I feel that this foot of mine
2524 is reluctant to come before her.
2525
2526 FERRANDO:
2527 My trembling lip
2528 can utter no word.
2529
2530 DON ALFONSO:
2531 The hero displays his manliness
2532 in the most terrible moments.
2533
2534 FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA:
2535 Now that we have heard the news,
2536 you have the lesser duty:
2537 Take heart, and plunge your swords
2538 into both our hearts.
2539
2540 FERRANDO, GUGLIELMO:
2541 My idol, blame fate
2542 that I must abandon you.
2543
2544 DORABELLA: Ah no, you shall not leave...
2545 FIORDILIGI: No, cruel one, you shall not go...
2546 DORABELLA: First I want to tear out my heart.
2547 FIORDILIGI: First I want to die at your feet.
2548 FERRANDO (softly to Don Alfonso): What do you say to that?
2549 GUGLIELMO (softly to Don Alfonso): You realise?
2550 DON ALFONSO (softly): Steady, friend, finem lauda.
2551
2552 ALL:
2553 Thus destiny defrauds
2554 the hopes of mortals.
2555 Ah, among so many misfortunes,
2556 who can ever love life?
2557
2ee7da68 2558=head2 v5.20.1-RC1 - Lorenzo da Ponte, trans. William Weaver, "Così fan tutte"
e1ded6ad
SH
2559
2560L<Announced on 2014-08-25 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/08/msg218975.html>
2561
2562 DON ALFONSO:
2563 I'd like to speak, but I haven't the heart:
2564 my lip stammers.
2565 My voice cannot emerge,
2566 but remains in my throat.
2567 What will you do? What shall I do?
2568 Oh what a great catastrophe!
2569 There can be nothing worse.
2570 I feel pity for you and for them.
2571
2572 FIORDILIGI: Heavens! For mercy's sake, Signor Alfonso, don't make us
2573 die.
2574 DON ALFONSO: My children, you must arm yourselves with constancy.
2575 DORABELLA: Ye Gods! What evil has occurred? What horrible event? Is my
2576 love dead, perhaps?
2577 FIORDILIGI: Is mine dead?
2578 DON ALFONSO: They are not dead, but they are not far from it.
2579 DORABELLA: Wounded?
2580 DON ALFONSO: No.
2581 FIORDILIGI: Ill?
2582 DON ALFONSO: Nor that.
2583 FIORDILIGI: What, then?
2584 DON ALFONSO: A royal command summons them to the field of battle.
2585 FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA: Alas, what do I hear? And they will leave?
2586 DON ALFONSO: Immediately.
2587 DORABELLA: And there is no way of preventing it?
2588 DON ALFONSO: There is none.
2589 FIORDILIGI: And not even a single farewell...
2590 DON ALFONSO: The unhappy men haven't the courage to see you; but if
2591 you wish it, they are ready...
2592 DORABELLA: Where are they?
2593 DON ALFONSO: Come in, friends.
2594
7684c8f0
RS
2595=head2 v5.20.0 - William Shakespeare, Sonnet 18
2596
2597L<Announced on 2014-05-27 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/05/msg215815.html>
2598
2599 But thy eternal summer shall not fade,
2600 Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st;
2601 Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
2602 When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st:
2603 So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
2604 So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.
2605
f17f1150
RS
2606=head2 v5.20.0-RC1 - Lindsey Buckingham, "Second Hand News"
2607
2608L<Announced on 2014-05-17 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/05/msg215479.html>
2609
2610 When times go bad
2611 when times go rough
2612 Won't you lay me down in tall grass
2613 And let me do my stuff
2614
2ee7da68 2615=head2 v5.19.11 - Isidore-Lucien Ducasse [as "Comte de Lautréamont"], trans. Paul Knight, "Les Chants de Maldoror"
50bb8485
SH
2616
2617L<Announced on 2014-04-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/04/msg214580.html>
2618
2619O rigorous mathematics, I have not forgotten you since your wise lessons,
2620sweeter than honey, filtered into my heart like a refreshing wave.
2621Instinctively, from the cradle, I had longed to drink from your source, older
2622than the sun, and I continue to tread the sacred sanctuary of your solemn
2623temple, I, the most faithful of your devotees. There was a vagueness in my
2624mind, something thick as smoke; but I managed to mount the steps which lead to
2625your altar, and you drove away this dark veil, as the wind blows the
2626draught-board. You replaced it with excessive coldness, consummate prudence and
2627implacable logic. With the aid of your fortifying milk, my intellect developed
2628rapidly and took on immense proportions amid the ravishing lucidity which you
2629bestow as a gift on all those who sincerely love you. Arithmetic! Algebra!
2630Geometry! Awe-inspiring trinity! Luminous triangle! He who has not known you
2631is a fool!
2632
2ee7da68 2633=head2 v5.19.10 - John Chadwick, "The Decipherment of Linear B"
9e616318
AC
2634
2635L<Announced on 2014-03-20 by Aaron Crane|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/03/msg213851.html>
071a75f5
AC
2636
2637The urge to discover secrets is deeply ingrained in human nature; even
2638the least curious mind is roused by the promise of sharing knowledge
2639withheld from others. Some are fortunate enough to find a job which
2640consists in the solution of mysteries, whether it be the physicist who
2641tracks down a hitherto unknown nuclear particle or the policeman who
2642detects a criminal. But most of us are driven to sublimate this urge
2643by the solving of artificial puzzles devised for our entertainment.
2644
2ee7da68 2645=head2 v5.19.9 - R. A. MacAvoy, "Tea with the Black Dragon"
132664ae
TC
2646
2647L<Announced on 2014-02-20 by Tony Cook|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/02/msg213047.html>
2648
2649Old hands. The smell of rain--the smell of Ch'an. Quiet words in
2650rough Cantonese. "I am not to be your master. Your master has to be
2651stronger than you are--has to tell you you are a fool and make you
2652know it. And make you feel content in being a fool. How could I do
2653that for you? I'm old. You are too strong for me; you are full of
2654chi." The old man has paused then, huddled against the wind while
2655clouds thickened above them.
2656
2657"I will tell you this, Long," he continued, "Before you find yourself
2658you will lose your chi. Also you will leave behind you all pride of
2659body, pride of mind. You will be reduced. Like me." The old man
2660closed his eyes, and rain began to beat against his gray, crew-cut
2661hair. He pulled his coat closer. Suddenly his eyes snapped open and
2662he looked Long in the face.
2663
2664"You must leave China. Go across the ocean. There you will meet your
2665master." He set down his teacup with a palsied hand. His voice rose,
2666grew fierce.
2667
2668"I tell you this, most honored and impressive visitor. You are a
2669fool, yes, but you will find the very thing you seek. You will find
2670truth!"
2671
2ee7da68 2672=head2 v5.19.8 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
d897adff
RS
2673
2674L<Announced on 2014-01-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/01/msg211729.html>
2675
2676“I used to get a big kick out of saving people’s lives. Now I wonder what the
2677hell’s the point, since they all have to die anyway.”
2678
2679“Oh, there’s a point, all right,” Dunbar assured him.
2680
2681“Is there? What is the point?”
2682
2683“The point is to keep them from dying for as long as you can.”
2684
2685“Yeah, but what’s the point, since they all have to die anyway?”
2686
2687“The trick is not to think about that.”
2688
2689“Never mind the trick. What the hell’s the point?”
2690
2691Dunbar pondered in silence for a few moments. “Who the hell knows?”
2692
2cff31c9
A
2693=head2 v5.19.7 - Kurt Vonnegut, "Slaughterhouse-Five"
2694
2695L<Announced on 2013-12-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/12/msg210882.html>
2696
e91f1fc1
SH
2697And somewhere in there was springtime. The corpse mines were closed
2698down. The soldiers all left to fight the Russians. In the suburbs,
2699the women and children dug rifle pits. Billy and the rest of his group
2700were locked up in the stable in the suburbs. And then, one morning,
2701they got up to discover that the door was unlocked. World War Two in
2702Europe was over.
2cff31c9 2703
e91f1fc1
SH
2704Billy and the rest wandered out onto the shady street. The trees were
2705leafing out. There was nothing going on out there, no traffic of any
2706kind. There was only one vehicle, an abandoned wagon drawn by two
2707horses. The wagon was green and coffin-shaped.
2cff31c9 2708
e91f1fc1 2709Birds were talking.
2cff31c9 2710
e91f1fc1 2711One bird said to Billy Pilgrim, "Pee-tee-weet?"
2cff31c9 2712
5a3c3c58
CBW
2713=head2 v5.19.6 - Monty Python's Flying Circus, "Spam"
2714
2715L<Announced on 2013-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/11/msg210043.html>
2716
4ed12d4a
SH
2717 Interior: cheap cafe. All the customers are Vikings. Mr and Mrs Bun enter downwards (on wires).
2718
2719 Mr. Bun: Morning.
2720 Waitress: Morning.
2721 Mr. Bun: What have you got, then?
2722 Waitress: Well there's egg and bacon; egg, sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg, bacon and spam;
2723 egg, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam;
2724 spam, spam, spam, egg and spam; spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam;
2725 or lobster thermidor aux crevettes, with a mornay sauce garnished with truffle pate, brandy and a fried
2726 egg on top and spam
2727 Mrs. Bun: Have you got anything without spam in it?
2728 Waitress: Well, there's spam, egg, sausage and spam. That's not got MUCH spam in it.
2729 Mrs. Bun: I don't want ANY spam.
2730 Mr. Bun: Why can't she have egg, bacon, spam and sausage?
2731 Mrs. Bun: That's got spam in it!
2732 Mr. Bun: Not as much as spam, egg, sausage and spam.
2733 Mrs. Bun: Look, could I have egg, bacon, spam and sausage, without the spam.
2734 Waitress: Uuuuuuggggh!
2735 Mrs. Bun: What d'you mean, uugggh! I don't like spam.
2736 Vikings: (singing) Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam ... spam, spam, spam, spam ... lovely spam, wonderful spam ...
2737
2738 (Brief shot of a Viking ship)
2739
2740 Waitress: Shut up. Shut up! Shut up! You can't have egg, bacon, spam and sausage without the spam.
2741 Mrs. Bun: Why not?
2742 Waitress: No, it wouldn't be egg, bacon, spam and sausage, would it?
2743 Mrs. Bun: I don't like spam!
5a3c3c58 2744
40e1c3e8 2745=head2 v5.19.5 - Charles Baudelaire, trans. James McGowan, "The Flowers of Evil", 51. The Cat
4d764166
SH
2746
2747L<Announced on 2013-10-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/10/msg208752.html>
2748
4d764166
SH
2749 I
2750
2751 A cat is strolling through my mind
2752 Acting as though he owned the place,
2753 A lovely cat -- strong, charming, sweet.
2754 When he meows, one scarcely hears,
2755
2756 So tender and discreet his tone;
2757 But whether he should growl or purr
2758 His voice is always rich and deep.
2759 That is the secret of his charm.
2760
2761 This purling voice that filters down
2762 Into my darkest depths of soul
2763 Fulfils me like a balanced verse,
2764 Delights me as a potion would.
2765
2766 It puts to sleep the cruellest ills
2767 And keeps a rein on ecstasies --
2768 Without the need for any words
2769 It can pronounce the longest phrase.
2770
2771 Oh no, there is no bow that draws
2772 Across my heart, fine instrument,
2773 And makes to sing so royally
2774 The strongest and the purest chord,
2775
2776 More than your voice, mysterious cat,
2777 Exotic cat, seraphic cat,
2778 In whom all is, angelically,
2779 As subtle as harmonious.
2780
2781 II
2782
2783 From his soft fur, golden and brown,
2784 Goes out so sweet a scent, one night
2785 I might have been embalmed in it
2786 By giving him one little pet.
2787
2788 He is my household's guardian soul;
2789 He judges, he presides, inspires
2790 All matters in hos royal realm;
2791 Might he be fairy? or a god?
2792
2793 When my eyes, to this cat I love
2794 Drawn as by a magnet's force,
2795 Turn tamely back from that appeal,
2796 And when I look within myself,
2797
2798 I notice with astonishment
2799 The fire of his opal eyes,
2800 Clear beacons glowing, living jewels,
2801 Taking my measure, steadily.
2802
ce520fa6
SH
2803=head2 v5.19.4 - Washington Irving, "The Widow and Her Son"
2804
2805L<Announced on 2013-09-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/09/msg207969.html>
2806
ce520fa6
SH
2807There is something in sickness that breaks down the pride of manhood;
2808that softens the heart and brings it back to the feelings of infancy.
2809Who that has languished, even in advanced life, in sickness and
2810despondency — who that has pined on a weary bed in the neglect and
2811loneliness of a foreign land — but has thought on the mother "that
2812looked on his childhood," that smoothed his pillow and administered to
2813his helplessness. — Oh! there is an enduring tenderness in the love
2814of a mother to her son that transcends all other affections of the
2815heart. It is neither to be chilled by selfishness — nor daunted by
2816danger — nor weakened by worthlessness — nor stifled by ingratitude.
2817She will sacrifice every comfort to his convenience — she will
2818surrender every pleasure to his enjoyment — she will glory in his fame
2819and exult in his prosperity. And if misfortune overtake him he will
2820be the dearer to her from misfortune — and if disgrace settle upon his
2821name, she will still love and cherish him in spite of his disgrace —
2822and if all the world beside cast him off, she will be all the world to
2823him.
2824
9a701c04
SH
2825=head2 v5.19.3 - Andrew Hodges, "Alan Turing: The Enigma"
2826
2827L<Announced on 2013-08-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/08/msg206318.html>
2828
9a701c04
SH
2829E.M. Forster, outdoing the King's heresy with grand bravura, had
2830written in 1938 that if he were faced with the choice between
2831betraying his country and betraying his friends, he hoped he would
2832have the courage to betray his country. He would always put the
2833personal above the political. But for Alan Turing, unlike Forster, or
2834Wittgenstein, or G.H. Hardy, it was more than a theoretical question.
2835For him not only had the personal become the political, but the
2836political was the personal. He had chosen and promised for himself in
2837working for the government. The choice for him therefore was that
2838between betraying one part of himself and betraying another part. And
2839however much he wavered between these alternatives, there was a solid
2840logic to the mind of security, one that could not be expected to take
2841an interest in notions of freedom and development. He had no rights
2842to such things, as he would have had to admit. He might have
2843outwitted the Home Guard, but when it came to questions that mattered,
2844there was no doubt that he had placed himself under military law.
2845There was a war on; there was always a war on now.
2846
0b0ed28b
AP
2847=head2 v5.19.2 - Fred Brooks, "The Mythical Man-Month"
2848
2849L<Announced on 2013-07-22 by Aristotle Pagaltzis|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/07/msg204905.html>
2850
c2a00619
KW
2851The magic of myth and legend has come true in our time. One types the
2852correct incantation on a keyboard, and a display screen comes to life,
2853showing things that never were nor could be. [...] Not all is delight,
2854however [...] One must perform perfectly. The computer resembles the
2855magic of legend in this respect, too. If one character, one pause, of
2856the incantation is not strictly in proper form, the magic doesn't work.
2857
549a11ea
DG
2858=head2 v5.19.1 - William Shakespeare, "A Midsummer Night's Dream"
2859
703078b2 2860L<Announced on 2013-06-21 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/06/msg203449.html>
549a11ea
DG
2861
2862 Over hill, over dale,
2863 Thorough bush, thorough briar,
2864 Over park, over pale,
2865 Thorough flood, thorough fire,
2866 I do wander everywhere,
2867 Swifter than the moon's sphere;
2868 And I serve the fairy queen,
2869 To dew her orbs upon the green.
2870 The cowslips tall her pensioners be;
2871 In their gold coats, spots you see;
2872 Those be rubies, fairy favours,
2873 In their freckles live our savours.
2874 I must go seek some dew-drops here,
2875 And hang a perl in every cowslip's ear.
2876 Farewell, thou lob of spirits, I'll be gone;
2877 My queen and all her elves come here anon!
2878
5f42d1f2 2879=head2 v5.19.0 - Batman, of the Joker, in "The Dark Knight Returns"
549a11ea
DG
2880
2881L<Announced on 2013-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201980.html>
2882
2883 From the beginning, I knew…
2884 …that there was nothing wrong with you…
2885 …that I can't fix…
2886 …with my hands…
2887
40e1c3e8 2888=head2 v5.18.4 - Robert W. Chambers, Cassilda's Song in "The King in Yellow," Act I, Scene 2
8bbce0b1
RS
2889
2890L<Announced on 2014-10-01 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/10/msg220770.html>
2891
2892 Along the shore the cloud waves break,
2893 The twin suns sink beneath the lake,
2894 The shadows lengthen
2895 In Carcosa.
2896
2897 Strange is the night where black stars rise,
2898 And strange moons circle through the skies
2899 But stranger still is
2900 Lost Carcosa.
2901
2902 Songs that the Hyades shall sing,
2903 Where flap the tatters of the King,
2904 Must die unheard in
2905 Dim Carcosa.
2906
2907 Song of my soul, my voice is dead;
2908 Die thou, unsung, as tears unshed
2909 Shall dry and die in
2910 Lost Carcosa.
2911
8bbce0b1
RS
2912=head2 v5.18.3 - (no epigraph)
2913
2914(no epigraph)
2915
40e1c3e8 2916=head2 v5.18.3-RC2 - Robert W. Chambers, "The King in Yellow", Act I, Scene 2
8bbce0b1 2917
dd047fac 2918L<Announced on 2014-09-27 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg220613.html>
8bbce0b1
RS
2919
2920"Ah! I see it now!" I shrieked. "You have seized the throne and the
2921empire. Woe! woe to you who are crowned with the crown of the King in
2922Yellow!"
2923
40e1c3e8 2924=head2 v5.18.3-RC1 - Robert W. Chambers, "The King in Yellow", Act I, Scene 2
8bbce0b1 2925
dd047fac 2926L<Announced on 2014-09-17 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/09/msg220072.html>
8bbce0b1
RS
2927
2928 CAMILLA: You, sir, should unmask.
2929
2930 STRANGER: Indeed?
2931
2932 CASSILDA: Indeed it's time. We all have laid aside disguise but you.
2933
2934 STRANGER: I wear no mask.
2935
2936 CAMILLA: (Terrified, aside to Cassilda.) No mask? No mask!
2937
6d0eb662
RS
2938=head2 v5.18.2 - Miss Manners
2939
2940L<Announced on 2014-01-06 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2014/01/msg211224.html>
2941
2942One of the major mistakes people make is that they think manners are
2943only the expression of happy ideas. There's a whole range of behavior
2944that can be expressed in a mannerly way. That's what civilization is all
2945about – doing it in a mannerly and not an antagonistic way. One of the
2946places we went wrong was the naturalistic Rousseauean movement of the
2947Sixties in which people said, "Why can't you just say what's on your
2948mind?" In civilization there have to be some restraints. If we followed
2949every impulse, we'd be killing one another.
2950
80963870
RS
2951=head2 v5.18.1 - Chuck Moore
2952
2953L<Announced on 2013-08-12 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/08/msg205897.html>
2954
2955The operating system is another concept that is curious. Operating
2956systems are dauntingly complex and totally unnecessary. It’s a brilliant
2957thing that Bill Gates has done in selling the world on the notion of
2958operating systems. It’s probably the greatest con game the world has
2959ever seen.
2960
2961An operating system does absolutely nothing for you. As long as you had
2962something — a subroutine called disk driver, a subroutine called some
2963kind of communication support, in the modern world, it doesn’t do
2964anything else. In fact, Windows spends a lot of time with overlays and
2965disk management all stuff like that which are irrelevant. You’ve got
2966gigabyte disks; you’ve got megabyte RAMs. The world has changed in a way
2967that renders the operating system unnecessary.
2968
2969=head2 v5.18.1-RC1 - Chuck Moore
2970
2971L<Announced on 2013-08-02 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/08/msg205445.html>
2972
2973Compilers are probably the worst code ever written. They are written by
2974someone who has never written a compiler before and will never do so
2975again. The more elaborate the language, the more complex, bug-ridden,
2976and unusable is the compiler. But a simple compiler for a simple
2977language is an essential tool—if only for documentation.
2978
4e720792
RS
2979=head2 v5.18.0 - Yevgeny Zamyatin
2980
2981L<Announced on 2013-05-18 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201940.html>
2982
2983It is an error to divide people into the living and the dead: there are people
2984who are dead-alive, and people who are alive-alive. The dead-alive also write,
2985walk, speak, act. But they make no mistakes; only machines make no mistakes,
2986and they produce only dead things. The alive-alive are constantly in error, in
2987search, in questions, in torment.
2988
2ee7da68 2989=head2 v5.18.0-RC4 - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
4e720792 2990
dd047fac 2991L<Announced on 2013-05-16 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201889.html>
4e720792
RS
2992
2993Clevinger was dead. That was the basic flaw in his philosophy.
2994
2995=head2 v5.18.0-RC3 - Tom Waits, "The Ocean Doesn't Want Me"
2996
dd047fac 2997L<Announced on 2013-05-14 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201823.html>
4e720792
RS
2998
2999 I'd love to go drowning
3000 And to stay and to stay
3001 But the ocean doesn't want me today
3002 I'll go in up to here
3003 It can't possibly hurt
3004 All they will find is my beer
3005 And my shirt
3006
3007=head2 v5.18.0-RC2 - Tom Waits, "Earth Died Screaming"
3008
3009L<Announced on 2013-05-12 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201723.html>
3010
3011 And the great day of wrath has come
3012 And here's mud in your big red eye
3013 The poker's in the fire
3014 And the locusts take the sky
3015 And the earth died screaming
3016 While I lay dreaming of you
3017
3018=head2 v5.18.0-RC1 - Tom Waits, "What's He Building in There?"
3019
3020L<Announced on 2013-05-11 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/05/msg201651.html>
3021
3022 What's he building in there?
3023
3024 We have a right to know…
3025
2ee7da68 3026=head2 v5.17.11 - Nigel Tufnel in "This is Spın̈al Tap"
4e720792
RS
3027
3028L<Announced on 2013-04-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/04/msg201056.html>
3029
3030It's very special because, if you can see, the numbers all go to…
3031eleven! Look, right across the board: eleven, eleven, eleven, eleven!
3032
2ee7da68 3033=head2 v5.17.10 - Vernor Vinge, "A Fire Upon The Deep"
7707f065 3034
f3d08688 3035L<Announced on 2013-03-23 by Max Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/03/msg200504.html>
7707f065
MM
3036
3037The archive informed the automation. Data structures were built, recipes
3038followed. A local network was built, faster than anything on Straum, but surely
3039safe. Nodes were added, modified by other recipes. The archive was a friendly
3040place, with hierarchies of translation keys that led them along. Straum itself
3041would be famous for this.
3042
3043Six months passed. A year.
3044
72f869fd 3045The omniscient view. Not self-aware really. Self-awareness is much over-rated.
7707f065 3046Most automation works far better as a part of a whole, and even if human-
72f869fd 3047powerful, it does not need to self-know.
7707f065 3048
2ee7da68 3049=head2 v5.17.9 - Douglas Adams, "The Hitch-Hikers Guide to the Galaxy"
fed67cf1 3050
f3d08688 3051L<Announced on 2013-02-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/02/msg199115.html>
fed67cf1
CBW
3052
3053Vogon poetry is of course, the third worst in the universe.
3054The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a
3055recitation by their poet master Grunthos the Flatulent of
3056his poem 'Ode To A Small Lump of Green Putty I Found In My
3057Armpit One Midsummer Morning' four of his audience died
3058of internal haemorrhaging and the president of the
3059Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one
3060of his own legs off. Grunthos is reported to have been
3061'disappointed' by the poem's reception, and was about to
3062embark on a reading of his twelve-book epic entitled
3063'My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles' when his own major intestine,
3064in a desperate attempt to save life and civilisation,
3065leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain.
3066
3067The very worst poetry of all perished along with its creator
3068Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Greenbridge, Essex, England,
3069in the destruction of the planet Earth.
3070
2ee7da68 3071=head2 v5.17.8 - Iain Pears, "An Instance of the Fingerpost"
2eea07f2 3072
f3d08688 3073L<Announced on 2013-01-20 by Aaron Crane|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/01/msg197571.html>
2eea07f2
AC
3074
3075I must here declare myself as someone who does not for a moment subscribe to
3076the general view that a willingness to perform oneself is detrimental to the
3077dignity of experimental philosophy. There is, after all, a clear distinction
3078between labour carried out for financial reward, and that done for the
3079improvement of mankind: to put it another way, Lower as a philosopher was
3080fully my equal even if he fell away when he became the practising physician.
3081I think ridiculous of certain professors of anatomy, who find it beneath
3082them to pick up the knife themselves, but merely comment while hired hands
3083do the cutting. Sylvius would never have dreamt of sitting on a dais reading
b86ac955 3084from an authority while others cut — when he taught, the knife was
2eea07f2
AC
3085in his hand and the blood spattered his coat. Boyle also did not scruple to
3086perform his own experiments and, on one occasion in my presence, even showed
3087himself willing to anatomise a rat with his very own hands. Nor was he less
3088a gentleman when he had finished. Indeed, in my opinion, his stature was all
3089the greater, for in Boyle wealth, humility and curiosity mingled, and the
3090world is richer for it.
3091
2ee7da68 3092=head2 v5.17.7 - R. Scott Bakker, "The Darkness That Comes Before"
c2a10b9c 3093
f3d08688 3094L<Announced on 2012-12-18 by Dave Rolsky|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/12/msg196707.html>
c2a10b9c
DR
3095
3096No thought.
4ed12d4a
SH
3097
3098The boy extinguished. Only a place.
3099
3100This place.
3101
3102Motionless, the Pragma sat facing him, the bare soles of his feet flat against each other, his dark frock scored by the shadows of deep folds, his eyes as empty as the child they watched.
3103
3104A place without breath or sound. A place of sight alone. A place without before or after . . . almost.
3105
3106For the first lances of sunlight careered over the glacier, as ponderous as great tree limbs in the wind. Shadows hardened and light gleamed across the Pragma’s ancient skull.
3107
3108The old man’s left hand forsook his right sleeve, bearing a watery knife. And like a rope in water, his arm pitched outward, fingertips trailing across the blade as the knife swung languidly into the air, the sun skating and the dark shrine plunging across its mirror back . . .
3109
3110And the place where Kellhus had once existed extended an open hand—the blond hairs like luminous filaments against tanned skin—and grasped the knife from stunned space.
3111
3112The slap of pommel against palm triggered the collapse of place into little boy. The pale stench of his body. Breath, sound, and lurching thoughts.
3113
3114I have been legion . . .
3115
3116In his periphery, he could see the spike of the sun ease from the mountain. He felt drunk with exhaustion. In the recoil of his trance, it seemed all he could hear were the twigs arching and bobbing in the wind, pulled by leaves like a million sails no bigger than his hand. Cause everywhere, but amid countless minute happenings—diffuse, useless.
3117
3118Now I understand.
c2a10b9c 3119
2ee7da68 3120=head2 v5.17.6 - Kurt Vonnegut, "The Sirens of Titan"
1443de07 3121
f3d08688 3122L<Announced on 2012-11-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/11/msg195659.html>
1443de07
RS
3123
3124Beatrice, looking like a gypsy queen, smoldered at the foot of a statue
3125of a young physical student. At first glance, the laboratory-gowned
3126scientist seemed to be a perfect servant of nothing but truth. At first
3127glance, one was convinced that nothing but truth could please him as he
3128beamed at his test tube. At first glance, one thought that he was as
3129much above the beastly concerns of mankind as the harmoniums in the
3130caves of Mercury. There, at first glance, was a young man without
3131vanity, without lust — and one accepted at its face value the title Salo
3132had engraved on the statue, "Discovery of Atomic Power."
3133
6720b7ff
FR
3134=head2 v5.17.5 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky"
3135
f3d08688 3136L<Announced on 2012-10-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/10/msg194349.html>
6720b7ff
FR
3137
3138Neither of them noticed the pair of polka-dotted knickers hiding
3139behind the ventilation duct overhead, listening patiently and
3140recording everything.
3141
e6a2c28f
FR
3142=head2 v5.17.4 - Roald Dahl, "Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf"
3143
f3d08688 3144L<Announced on 2012-09-19 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/09/msg192635.html>
e6a2c28f 3145
5814c912
RS
3146 The small girl smiles. One eyelid flickers.
3147 She whips a pistol from her knickers.
3148 She aims it at the creature's head,
3149 And bang bang bang, she shoots him dead.
e6a2c28f 3150
5814c912
RS
3151 A few weeks later, in the wood,
3152 I came across Miss Riding Hood.
3153 But what a change! No cloak of red,
3154 No silly hood upon her head.
3155 She said, "Hello, and do please note
3156 My lovely furry wolfskin coat."
e6a2c28f 3157
4079ea87
SH
3158=head2 v5.17.3 - Kris Ta-belle, "Smoked Perl Onion Soup"
3159
3160L<Announced on 2012-08-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/08/msg190775.html>
3161
3162Preparation:
3163
3164Cut 16 Perl Onions into quarters and put them in a grill smoker rack
3165or a perforated pan over a BBQ using hickory wood chips or Special
3166Blend Smoker Bisquettes. Smoke them for an hour and remove once they
3167look golden brown.
3168Let them cool and put them in the fridge (or freezer) until you are
3169ready to create the soup.
3170
3171Ingredients:
3172
5814c912
RS
3173 16 diced, pre-smoked, Perl Onions
3174 3 tbsp butter
3175 1/4 cup olive oil
3176 2 small garlic cloves, finely minced
3177 1 tsp salt
3178 1 tsp sugar
3179 black pepper to taste
3180 1 cup red wine
3181 1/4 cup all purpose flour
3182 6 cups of beef or vegetable stock
3183 1 cup of thick cream (milk can be used as a substitute)
4079ea87
SH
3184
3185Method:
3186
5814c912
RS
3187 Melt the butter in a pan and then add olive oil.
3188 Heat and add the onions to caramelize over a medium-high heat for up
3189 to half an hour.
3190 Add the garlic, turn down the heat and cook for a further 5 minutes.
3191 Add the salt, pepper and sugar.
3192 Now add the red wine and reduce to a jam like consistency.
3193 Add the flour, stir well and add the stock a cup at a time.
3194 Simmer for 30 minutes, add the cream and heat to almost boiling.
4079ea87
SH
3195
3196Enjoy.
3197
d7846122
TC
3198=head2 v5.17.2 - Terry Pratchet, "The Colour of Magic"
3199
3d76f962 3200L<Announced on 2012-07-21 by TonyC|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/07/msg189828.html>
d7846122
TC
3201
3202‘I knew it,’ said Rincewind. ‘We're in a strong magical field.’
3203
3204Twoflower and Hrun looked around the little hollow where they had made
3205their noonday halt. Then they looked at each other.
3206
3207The horses were quietly cropping the rich grass by the stream. Yellow
3208butterflies skittered among the bushes. There was a smell of thyme
3209and a buzzing of bees. The wild pigs on the spit sizzled gently.
3210
3211Hrun shrugged and went back to oiling his biceps. They gleamed.
3212
3213‘Looks alright to me,’ he said.
3214
3215‘Try tossing a coin,’ said Rincewind.
3216
3217‘What?’
3218
3219‘Go on. Toss a coin.’
3220
3221‘Hokay,’ said Hrun. 'If that gives you any pleasure.’ He reached into
3222his pouch and withdrew a handful of loose change plundered from a
3223dozen realms. With some care he selected a Zchloty leaden
3224quarter-iotum and balanced it on a purple thumbnail.
3225
3226‘You call,’ he said. ‘Heads or—’ he inspected the obverse with
3227an air of intense concentration, ‘some sort of a fish with legs.’
3228
3229‘When it's in the air,’ said Rincewind. Hrun grinned and flicked his thumb.
3230
3231The iotum rose, spinning.
3232
3233‘Edge,’ said Rincewind, without looking at it.
3234
322e634c
JL
3235=head2 v5.17.1 - Rand Miller, "Myst: The Book of Ti'ana"
3236
3237L<Announced on 2012-06-20 by doy|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/06/msg188354.html>
3238
3239On their return from Ko'ah, Aitrus had shown her the Book, patiently
3240taking her through page after page, and showing her how such an Age was
3241"made." She had seen at once the differences between this archaic form
3242and the ordinary written speech of the D'ni, noting how it was not
3243merely more elaborate but more specific: a language of precise yet
3244subtle descriptive power. Yet seeing was one thing, believing another.
3245Given all the evidence, her rational mind still fought against accepting
3246it.
3247
dd15390c
Z
3248=head2 v5.17.0 - Charles Stross, "Singularity Sky"
3249
f51b9d59 3250L<Announced on 2012-05-26 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/05/msg187214.html>
dd15390c
Z
3251
3252`Welcome, comrades!' Burya opened his arms toward the soldier.
3253`Yes it is true! With help from our allies of the Festival, the iron
3254hand of the reactionary junta is about to be overthrown for all time!
3255The new economy is being born; the marginal cost of production has
3256been abolished, and from now on, if any item is produced once, it can
3257be replicated infinitely. From each according to his imagination,
3258to each according to his needs! Join us or better still, bring your
3259fellow soldiers and workers to join us!'
3260
3261There was a sharp bang from the roof of the Corn Exchange, right at the
3262climax of his impromptu speech; heads turned in alarm. Something had
3263broken inside the spork factory and a stream of rainbow-hued plastic
3264implements fountained toward the sky and clattered to the cobblestones
3265on every side, like a harbinger of the postindustrial society to come.
3266Workers and peasants alike stared in open-mouthed bewilderment at this
3267astounding display of productivity, then bent to scrabble in the muck
3268for the brightly colored sporks of revolution. A volley of shots rang
3269out and Burya Rubenstein raised his hands, grinning wildly, to accept
3270the salute of the soldiers from the Skull Hill garrison.
3271
c682aa67
SH
3272=head2 v5.16.3 - Devo, "Freedom of Choice"
3273
3274L<Announced on 2013-03-11 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/03/msg200009.html>
3275
3276 A victim of collision on the open sea
3277 Nobody ever said that life was free
3278 Sink, swim, go down with the ship
3279 But use your freedom of choice
3280
3281=head2 v5.16.2 - Stanislaw Lem, "The Cyberiad", Trurl's Machine
3282
3283L<Announced on 2012-11-01 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/11/msg194915.html>
3284
3285Once upon a time Trurl the constructor built an eight-story thinking
3286machine. When it was finished, he gave it a coat of white paint,
3287trimmed the edges in lavender, stepped back, squinted, then added a
3288little curlicue on the front and, where one might imagine the forehead
3289to be, a few pale orange polkadots. Extremely pleased with himself,
3290he whistled an air and, as is always done on such occasions, asked it
3291the ritual question of how much is two plus two.
3292
3293The machine stirred. Its tubes began to glow, its coils warmed up,
3294current coursed through all its circuits like a waterfall,
3295transformers hummed and throbbed, there was a clanging, and a
3296chugging, and such an ungodly racket that Trurl began to think of
3297adding a special mentation muffler. Meanwhile the machine labored on,
3298as if it had been given the most difficult problem in the Universe to
3299solve; the ground shook, the sand slid underfoot from the vibration,
3300valves popped like champagne corks, the relays nearly gave way under
3301the strain. At last, when Trurl had grown extremely impatient, the
3302machine ground to a halt and said in a voice like thunder: SEVEN!
3303
2ee7da68 3304=head2 v5.16.1 - Emerald Rose, "Never Split The Party"
a210cc89 3305
6dab83b1 3306L<Announced on 2012-08-08 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/08/msg190413.html>
a210cc89
RS
3307
3308 Don't you know? You never split the party
3309 Clerics in the back to keep those fighters hale and hearty
3310 The wizard in the middle, where he can shed some light
3311 And you never let that damn thief out of sight…
3312
c33412d7 3313=head2 v5.16.1-RC1 - Tom Moldvay, Foreward to the "Dungeons & Dragons Basic Rulebook"
a210cc89 3314
6dab83b1 3315L<Announced on 2012-08-03 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/08/msg190264.html>
a210cc89
RS
3316
3317I was busy rescuing the captured maiden when the dragon showed up.
3318Fifty feed of scaled terror glared down at us with smoldering red eyes.
3319Tendrils of smoke drifted out from between fangs larger than daggers.
3320The dragon blocked the only exit from the cave.
3321
3322
3323
3324I unwrapped the sword which the mysterious cleric had given me. The
3325sword was golden-tinted steel. Its hilt was set with a rainbow
3326collection of precious gems. I shouted my battle cry and charged
3327
3328My charge caught the dragon by surprise. Its titanic jaws snapped shut
3329inches from my face. I swung the golden sword with both arms. The
3330swordblade bit into the dragon's neck and continued through to the other
3331side. With an earth-shaking crash, the dragon dropped dead at my feet.
3332The magic sword had saved my life and ended the reign of the
3333dragon-tyrant. The countryside was freed and I could return as a hero.
3334
2ee7da68 3335=head2 v5.16.0 - W.H. Auden, "September 1, 1939"
4c4c16b2 3336
6dab83b1 3337L<Announced on 2012-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/05/msg186903.html>
4c4c16b2 3338
a210cc89
RS
3339 All I have is a voice
3340 To undo the folded lie,
3341 The romantic lie in the brain
3342 Of the sensual man-in-the-street
3343 And the lie of Authority
3344 Whose buildings grope the sky:
3345 There is no such thing as the State
3346 And no one exists alone;
3347 Hunger allows no choice
3348 To the citizen or the police;
3349 We must love one another or die.
3350
2ee7da68 3351=head2 v5.15.9 - Bob Dylan, "Blowin' In The Wind"
54fdd2d6 3352
6dab83b1 3353L<Announced on 2012-03-20 by Abigail|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/03/msg184824.html>
a97faa3d 3354
4ed12d4a
SH
3355 How many roads must a man walk down
3356 Before you call him a man?
3357 Yes, 'n' how many seas must a white dove sail
3358 Before she sleeps in the sand?
3359 Yes, 'n' how many times must the cannonballs fly
3360 Before they're forever banned?
3361 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
3362 The answer is blowin' in the wind
3363
3364 How many years can a mountain exist
3365 Before it's washed to the sea?
3366 Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
3367 Before they're allowed to be free?
3368 Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head
3369 Pretending he just doesn't see?
3370 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
3371 The answer is blowin' in the wind
3372
3373 How many times must a man look up
3374 Before he can see the sky?
3375 Yes, 'n' how many ears must one man have
3376 Before he can hear people cry?
3377 Yes, 'n' how many deaths will it take till he knows
3378 That too many people have died?
3379 The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
3380 The answer is blowin' in the wind
54fdd2d6 3381
2ee7da68 3382=head2 v5.15.8 - The KLF, "The Manual-How To Have A Number One The Easy Way"
1f9d7ff5 3383
6dab83b1 3384L<Announced on 2012-02-20 by Max Maischein|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/02/msg183919.html>
1f9d7ff5
MM
3385
3386 "Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
3387 Doctor Who, in the Tardis
3388 Doctor Who, hey Doctor Who
3389 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who
3390 Doctor Who, Doc, Doctor Who"
3391
3392Gibberish of course, but every lad in the country under a certain
3393age related instinctively to what it was about. The ones slightly
3394older needed a couple of pints inside them to clear away the mind
3395debris left by the passing years before it made sense. As for
3396girls and our chorus, we think they must have seen it as pure crap.
3397A fact that must have limited to zero our chances of staying at The
3398Top for more than one week.
3399
3400Stock, Aitkin and Waterman, however, are kings of writing chorus
3401lyrics that go straight to the emotional heart of the 7" single
3402buying girls in this country. Their most successful records will kick
3403into the chorus with a line which encapsulates the entire emotional
3404meaning of the song. This will obviously be used as the title. As
3405soon as Rick Astley hit the first line of the chorus on his debut
3406single it was all over - the Number One position was guaranteed:
3407
3408 "I'm never going to give you up"
3409
2ee7da68 3410=head2 v5.15.7 - Penelope Lively, "The Voyage of QV66"
cf6bc744 3411
6dab83b1 3412L<Announced on 2012-01-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/01/msg182230.html>
cf6bc744
CBW
3413
3414"Laboratories," announced Henry. "Kindly don't touch anything."
3415
3416He led us into a long low brick shed. Outside there was a
3417notice on a piece of board, crudely printed in red paint,
3418which said GRATE SIENCE DISCOVERYS DONE HERE SSSH! BRING YOUR
3419OWN BUKKIT NO PINCHING ANYWUN ELSE'S EXPERRYMENTS CANTEEN OPEN
3420ALL DAY CHIMPS ONLY.
3421
3422There were a lot of large black monkeys inside, all intently
3423busy on what they were doing. Some of them were pouring stuff
3424out of bottles into buckets and carefully stirring the ensuing
3425mixture; others were at work with glass tubes and jars, blowing
3426and measuring and mixing; others were crouched over long benches
3427with tools and heaps of bits and pieces of metal, cutting and
3428bending and constructing. There was a great deal of noise and
3429chatter. Every now and then one of them would give a whoop of
3430excitement and all the others would gather round and jump up and
3431down cheering and applauding.
3432
3433"Chimps," said Henry. "They're awfully clever."
3434
2ee7da68 3435=head2 v5.15.6 - Ursula K. Leguin, "A Wizard of Earthsea"
b0d358f0 3436
6dab83b1 3437L<Announced on 2011-12-20 by Dave Rolsky|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/12/msg180962.html>
b0d358f0
DR
3438
3439Ged had thought that as the prentice of a great mage he would enter at once
3440into the mystery and mastery of power. He would understand the language of the
3441beasts and the speech of the leaves of the forest, he thought, and sway the
3442winds with his word, and learn to change himself into any shape he
3443wished. Maybe he and his master would run together as stags, or fly to Re Albi
3444over the mountain on the wings of eagles.
3445
3446But it was not so at all. They wandered, first down into the Vale and then
3447gradually south and westward around the mountain, given lodging in little
3448villages or spending the night out in the wilderness, like poor
3449journeyman-sorcerers, or tinkers, or beggars. They entered no mysterious
3450domain. Nothing happened. The mage's oaken staff that Ged had watched at first
3451with eager dread was nothing but a stout staff to walk with. Three days went
3452by and four days went by and still Ogion had not spoken a single charm in
3453Ged's hearing, and had not taught him a single name or rune or spell.
3454
2ee7da68 3455=head2 v5.15.5 - Nikolai Gogol, trans. Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky, "The Diary of a Madman"
d0fc7727 3456
6dab83b1 3457L<Announced on 2011-11-20 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/11/msg179588.html>
d0fc7727
SH
3458
3459This day - is a day of the greatest solemnity! Spain has a king. He has
3460been found. I am that king. Only this very day did I learn of it. I
3461confess, it came to me suddenly in a flash of lightning. I don't understand
3462how I could have thought and imagined that I was a titular councillor. How
3463could such a wild notion enter my head? It's a good thing no one thought of
3464putting me in an insane asylum. Now everything is laid open before me. Now
3465I see everything as on the palm of my hand. And before, I don't understand,
3466before everything around me was in some sort of fog. And all this happens, I
3467think, because people imagine that the human brain is in the head. Not at
3468all: it is brought by a wind from the direction of the Caspian Sea. First
3469off, I announced to Mavra who I am. When she heard that the king of Spain
3470was standing before her, she clasped her hands and nearly died of fright.
3471The stupid woman had never seen a king of Spain before. However, I
3472endeavoured to calm her down and assured her in gracious words of my
3473benevolence and that I was not at all angry that she sometimes polished my
3474boots poorly. They're benighted folk. It's impossible to tell them about
3475lofty matters. She got frightened because she's convinced that all kings of
3476Spain are like Philip II. But I explained to her that there was no
3477resemblance between me and Philip II, and that I didn't have a single
3478Capuchin . . . I didn't go to the office . . . To hell with it! No friends,
3479you won't lure me there now; I'm not going to copy your vile papers!
3480
1542e678
FR
3481=head2 v5.15.4 - Steve Jobs
3482
6dab83b1 3483L<Announced on 2011-10-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/10/msg178412.html>
1542e678
FR
3484
3485A lot of people in our industry haven't had very diverse experiences. So they
3486don't have enough dots to connect, and they end up with very linear solutions
3487without a broad perspective on the problem. The broader one's understanding of
3488the human experience, the better design we will have.
3489
2ee7da68 3490=head2 v5.15.3 - Oscar Wilde, From the preface to "The Picture of Dorian Gray"
607b15aa 3491
6dab83b1 3492L<Announced on 2011-09-20 by Stevan Little|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177427.html>
ca420de3 3493
4ed12d4a
SH
3494All art is at once surface and symbol. Those who go beneath
3495the surface do so at their peril. Those who read the symbol
3496do so at their peril.
607b15aa 3497
4ed12d4a
SH
3498It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors.
3499Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the
3500work is new, complex, and vital. When critics disagree, the
3501artist is in accord with himself.
607b15aa 3502
4ed12d4a
SH
3503We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as
3504he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless
3505thing is that one admires it intensely.
607b15aa 3506
4ed12d4a 3507All art is quite useless.
607b15aa 3508
2ee7da68 3509=head2 v5.15.2 - Rainer Maria Rilke, trans., C. F. MacIntyre, "Duino", The First Elegy
bfb65171 3510
6dab83b1 3511L<Announced on 2011-08-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/08/msg176067.html>
bfb65171 3512
5814c912
RS
3513 True, it is strange to live no more on earth,
3514 no longer follow the folkways scarecely learned;
3515 not to give roses and other especially auspicious
3516 things the significance of a human future;
3517 to be no more what one was in infinitely anxious hands,
3518 and to put aside even one's name, like a broken plaything.
3519 Strange, to wish wishes no longer. Strange, to see
3520 all that was related fluttering so loosely in space.
3521 And being dead is hard, full of catching-up,
3522 so that finally one feels a little eternity.–
3523 But the living all make the mistake of too sharp discrimination.
3524 Often angels (it's said) don't know if they move
3525 among the quick or the dead. The eternal current
3526 hurtles all ages along with it forever
3527 through both realms and drowns their voices in both.
bfb65171 3528
1889cb12
Z
3529=head2 v5.15.1 - Greg Egan, "Permutation City"
3530
2ccefb8a 3531L<Announced on 2011-07-20 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/07/msg175014.html>
1889cb12
Z
3532
3533Carter held out a hand towards the middle of the room. `See that
3534fountain?' A ten-metre-wide marble wedding cake, topped with a
3535winged cherub wrestling a serpent, duly appeared. Water cascaded
3536down from a gushing wound in the cherub's neck. Carter said, `It's
3537being computed by redundancies in the sketch of the city. I can
3538extract the results, because I know exactly where to look for them --
3539but nobody else would have a hope in hell of picking them out.'
3540
3541Peer walked up to the fountain. Even as he approached, he noticed
3542that the spray was intangible; when he dipped his hand in the water
3543around the base he felt nothing, and the motion he made with his
3544fingers left the foaming surface unchanged. They were spying on
3545the calculations, not interacting with them; the fountain was a
3546closed system.
3547
3548Carter said, `In your case, of course, nobody will need to know
3549the results. Except you -- and you'll know them because you'll
3550/be/ them.'
3551
452ead5e
DG
3552=head2 v5.15.0 - Neil Gaiman, "The Graveyard Book"
3553
3554L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173748.html>
3555
4ed12d4a 3556If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all you will have gained.
452ead5e 3557
c682aa67 3558=head2 v5.14.4 - Arthur C. Clarke, "The Nine Billion Names of God"
b3c5102d 3559
c682aa67 3560L<Announced on 2013-03-11 by Dave Mitchell|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2013/03/msg199988.html>
b3c5102d 3561
c682aa67
SH
3562He began to sing, but gave it up after a while. This vast arena of
3563mountains, gleaming like whitely hooded ghosts on every side, did not
3564encourage such ebullience. Presently George glanced at his watch.
3565
3566'Should be there in an hour,' he called back over his shoulder to
3567Chuck. Then he added, in an afterthought: 'Wonder if the computer's
3568finished its run. It was due about now.'
3569
3570Chuck didn't reply, so George swung round in his saddle. He could just
3571see Chuck's face, a white oval turned towards the sky.
3572
3573'Look,' whispered Chuck, and George lifted his eyes to heaven. (There
3574is always a last time for everything.)
3575
3576Overhead, without any fuss, the stars were going out.
3577
3578=head2 v5.14.3 - William Shakespeare, "As You Like It"
3579
3580L<Announced on 2012-10-12 by Dominic Hargreaves|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/10/msg194057.html>
3581
3582 The poor world is almost six thousand years old, and in all
3583 this time there was not any man died in his own person,
3584 videlicit, in a love-cause. Troilus had his brains dashed
3585 out with a Grecian club; yet he did what he could to die
3586 before, and he is one of the patterns of love. Leander, he
3587 would have lived many a fair year, though Hero had turned
3588 nun, if it had not been for a hot midsummer night; for, good
3589 youth, he went but forth to wash him in the Hellespont and
3590 being taken with the cramp was drowned and the foolish
3591 coroners of that age found it was 'Hero of Sestos.' But these
3592 are all lies: men have died from time to time and worms have
3593 eaten them, but not for love.
3594
3595=head2 v5.14.2 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
3596
3597L<Announced on 2011-09-26 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/09/msg177618.html>
3598
3599It's not so much that people don't value the programs after they have them--they
3600do value them. But they're not the sort of thing that would ever catch on if
3601they had to overcome the marketing barrier. (I don't yet know if perl will
3602catch on at all--I'm worried enough about it that I specifically included an
3603awk-to-perl translator just to help it catch on.) Maybe it's all just an
3604inferiority complex. Or maybe I don't like to be mercenary.
3605
3606So I guess I'd say that the reason some software comes free is that the
3607mechanism for selling it is missing, either from the work environment, or from
3608the heart of the programmer.
b3c5102d 3609
c684cf36 3610=head2 v5.14.1 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
901b3fdb
LB
3611
3612L<Announced on 2011-06-16 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173650.html>
3613
3614At this point I'm no longer working for a company that makes me sign
3615my life away, but by now I'm in the habit. Besides, I still harbor
3616the deep-down suspicion that nobody would pay money for what I write,
3617since most of it just helps you do something better that you could
3618already do some other way. How much money would you personally pay
3619to upgrade from readnews to rn? How much money would you pay for
3620the patch program? As for warp, it's a mere game. And anything you
3621can do with perl you can eventually do with an amazing and totally
3622unreadable conglomeration of awk, sed, sh and C.
3623
c684cf36 3624=head2 v5.14.0 - L<< Larry Wall, January 12, 1988 <992@devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV> |http://groups.google.com/group/comp.sources.d/msg/5d17fa68c250b9b2 >>
8b55b028
ZA
3625
3626L<Announced on 2011-05-14 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172326.html>
3627
3628At the start of any project, I'm programming primarily to please
3629myself. (The two chief virtues in a programmer are laziness and
3630impatience.) After a while somebody looks over my shoulder and says,
3631"That's neat. It'd be neater if it did such-and-so." So the thing
3632gets neater. Pretty soon (a year or two) I have an rn, a warp, a patch,
3633or a perl. One of these years I'll have a metaconfig.
3634
3635I then say to myself, "I don't want my life's work to die when this
3636computer is scrapped, so I should let some other people use this. If I
3637ask my company to sell this, it'll never see the light of day, and nobody
3638would pay much for it anyway. If I sell it myself, I'll be in trouble with
3639my company, to whom I signed my life away when I was hired. If I give it
3640away, I can pretend it was worthless in the first place, so my company
3641won't care. In any event, it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission."
3642
3643So a freely distributable program is born.
3644
3645=head2 v5.14.0-RC3 - American Airlines Gate Agent, last call
3646
3647L<Announced on 2011-05-11 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg172282.html>
3648
3649This is the last call for flight 1697 with service to Chicago and
3650continuing service to San Francisco. All passengers should already be
3651aboard. If you aren't aboard at this time, you will be denied boarding
3652and your bags will be offloaded.
3653
2ee7da68 3654=head2 v5.14.0-RC2 - Greg Grandin, "Fordlandia: The Rise and Fall of Henry Ford's Forgotten Jungle City"
8b55b028
ZA
3655
3656L<Announced on 2011-05-04 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/05/msg171879.html>
3657
3658Over the course of nearly two decades, Ford would spend tens of millions
3659of dollars founding not one but, after the plantation was defastated
3660by leaf blight, two American towns, complete with central squares,
3661sidewalks, indoor plumbing, hospitals, manicured lawns, movie theaters,
3662swimming pools, golf courses, and, of course, Model Ts and As rolling
3663down their paved streets.
3664
3665Back in America, newspapers kept up their drumbeat celebration, only
3666obliquely referencing reports that things were not progressing as the
3667company had hoped. But there was one note of skepticism. In late 1928,
3668the Washington Post ran an editorial that read in its entirety: "Ford will
3669govern a rubber plantation in Brazil larger than North Carolina. This is
3670the first time he has applied quantity production methods to trouble"
3671
3672=head2 v5.14.0-RC1 - Bill Bryson, "In a Sunburned Country"
3673
3674L<Announced on 2011-04-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/04/msg171253.html>
3675
3676But then Australia is such a difficult country to keep track of. On
3677my first visit, some years ago, I passed the time on the long flight
3678reading a history of Australian politics in the twentieth century,
3679wherein I encountered the startling fact that in 1967 the prime minister,
3680Harold Holt, was strolling along a beach in Victoria when he plunged into
3681the surf and vanished. No trace of the poor man was ever seen again.
b86ac955 3682This seemed doubly astounding to me—first that Australia could
8b55b028
ZA
3683just I<lose> a prime minister (I mean, come on) and second that news of
3684this had never reached me.
3685
2ee7da68 3686=head2 v5.13.11 - Walt Whitman, L<"Leaves of Grass"|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leaves_of_Grass>
04496198 3687
f3d08688 3688L<Announced on 2011-03-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/03/msg170206.html>
04496198
FR
3689
3690 When the full-grown poet came,
3691 Out spake pleased Nature (the round impassive globe, with all its
3692 shows of day and night,) saying, He is mine;
3693 But out spake too the Soul of man, proud, jealous and unreconciled,
3694 Nay he is mine alone;
3695 --Then the full-grown poet stood between the two, and took each
3696 by the hand;
c2a00619
KW
3697 And to-day and ever so stands, as blender, uniter, tightly
3698 holding hands,
04496198
FR
3699 Which he will never release until he reconciles the two,
3700 And wholly and joyously blends them.
3701
2ee7da68 3702=head2 v5.13.10 - Egill Skalla-Grímsson, L<"Egils saga Skalla-Grímssonar"|http://www.heimskringla.no/wiki/Egils_saga_Skalla-Gr%C3%ADmssonar>
f1e17f6f 3703
fbc70a9e 3704L<Announced on 2011-02-20 by Ævar Arnfjörð Bjarmason|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/02/msg169340.html>
30688243 3705
4ed12d4a
SH
3706 Skalat maðr rúnar rísta,
3707 nema ráða vel kunni.
3708 Þat verðr mörgum manni,
3709 es of myrkvan staf villisk.
3710 Sák á telgðu talkni
3711 tíu launstafi ristna.
3712 Þat hefr lauka lindi
3713 langs ofrtrega fengit.
30688243 3714
79af17bd
AB
3715=head2 v5.13.9 - John F Kennedy, L<Inaugural Address January 20, 1961|http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/John_F._Kennedy%27s_Inaugural_Address>
3716
3717L<Announced on 2011-01-20 by Jesse Vincent|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/01/msg168335.html>
3718
3719In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been
3720granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I
3721do not shrink from this responsibility -- I welcome it. I do not believe
3722that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other
3723generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this
3724endeavor will light our country and all who serve it. And the glow from
3725that fire can truly light the world.
3726
3727And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you;
3728ask what you can do for your country.
3729
3730My fellow citizens of the world, ask not what America will do for you,
3731but what together we can do for the freedom of man.
3732
3733Finally, whether you are citizens of America or citizens of the world,
3734ask of us here the same high standards of strength and sacrifice which
3735we ask of you. With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history
3736the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth to lead the land we love,
3737asking His blessing and His help, but knowing that here on earth God's
3738work must truly be our own.
3739
94521723
Z
3740=head2 v5.13.8 - Roger Williams, L<"The Fifth Gift"|http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/8/19/21304/8493>
3741
2831a86c
ZA
3742L<Announced on 2010-12-19 by Zefram|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/12/msg167271.html>
3743
94521723
Z
3744The aliens called the box a "matter generator," but we'd be more inclined
3745to call it a matter duplicator. By connecting switches and potentiometers
3746between the copper posts it was possible to make the box mark off two
3747cubic rectangular areas of volume. Make a certain contact, and these
3748areas would be isolated within perfectly reflective fields. They could
3749be expanded or contracted by altering resistances between other posts.
3750As I worked out the user interface I built a little control panel for
3751the device. It was actually a clever way for the aliens to do things;
3752instead of trying to build controls we could use, they built us an
3753interface we could attach to controls that made sense to us. It could
3754also be automated.
3755
3756Once you had made the contact that established the shielded volumes,
3757if you made another certain contact the contents of the first volume
3758were copied to the second. The machine copied metal, plastic, steel,
3759and diamond with equal ease. Copies of copies of copies of copies were
3760indistinguishable from the originals at any magnification, even using
3761techniques like X-ray crystallography.
3762
2ee7da68 3763=head2 v5.13.7 - Andy Wachowski and Lana Wachowski, "The Matrix"
6b1649d0 3764
2831a86c
ZA
3765L<Announced on 2010-11-20 by Chris 'BinGOs' Williams|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/11/msg166162.html>
3766
6b1649d0
CBW
3767[Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one]
3768
5814c912 3769 Neo: Whoa. Deja vu.
6b1649d0
CBW
3770
3771[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
3772
5814c912
RS
3773 Trinity: What did you just say?
3774 Neo: Nothing. Just had a little deja vu.
3775 Trinity: What did you see?
3776 Cypher: What happened?
89550e55
RS
3777 Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just
3778 like it.
5814c912
RS
3779 Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat?
3780 Neo: It might have been. I'm not sure.
3781 Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
3782 Neo: What is it?
89550e55
RS
3783 Trinity: A deja vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when
3784 they change something.
6b1649d0 3785
54cc2c9a
TM
3786=head2 v5.13.6 - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore"
3787
2831a86c
ZA
3788L<Announced on 2010-10-20 by Tatsuhiko Miyagawa|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/10/msg165183.html>
3789
54cc2c9a
TM
3790The boy called Crow softly rests a hand on my shoulder, and with that
3791he storm vanishes.
3792
3793"From now on -- no matter what -- you've got to be the world's toughest
3794fifteen-year-old. That's the only way you're going to survive. And in order
3795to do that, you've got to figure out what it means to be tough. You following
3796me?"
3797
3798I keep my eyes closed and don't reply. I just want to sink off into sleep
3799like this, his hand on my shoulder. I hear the faint flutter of wings.
3800
3801"You're going to be the world's toughest fifteen-year-old," Crow whispers
3802as I try to fall asleep. Like he was carving the words in a deep blue tattoo
3803on my heart.
3804
3805(Translated from Japanese by Philip Gabriel)
3806
f6c56125
SH
3807=head2 v5.13.5 - Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, "The Room in the Dragon Volant"
3808
2831a86c
ZA
3809L<Announced on 2010-09-19 by Steve Hay|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/09/msg164238.html>
3810
f6c56125
SH
3811Candle in hand I stepped in. I do not know whether the quality of
3812air, long undisturbed, is peculiar; to me it has always seemed so, and
3813the damp smell of the old masonry hung in this atmosphere. My candle
3814faintly lighted the bare stone wall that enclosed the stair, the foot
3815of which I could not see. Down I went, and a few turns brought me to
3816the stone floor. Here was another door, of the simple, old, oak kind,
3817deep sunk in the thickness of the wall. The large end of the key
3818fitted this. The lock was stiff; I set the candle down upon the
3819stair, and applied both hands; it turned with difficulty, and as it
3820revolved, uttered a shriek that alarmed me for my secret.
3821
3822For some minutes I did not move. In a little time, however, I took
3823courage, and opened the door. The night-air floating in puffed out
3824the candle. There was a thicket of holly and underwood, as dense as a
3825jungle, close about the door. I should have been in pitch-darkness,
3826were it not that through the topmost leaves there twinkled, here and
3827there, a glimmer of moonshine.
3828
3829Softly, lest any one should have opened his window at the sound of the
3830rusty bolt, I struggled through this till I gained a view of the open
3831grounds. Here I found that the brushwood spread a good way up the
3832park, uniting with the wood that approached the little temple I have
806849f8 3833described.
f6c56125 3834
fdea69f9
FR
3835=head2 v5.13.4 - Lewis Carroll, "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"
3836
2831a86c
ZA
3837L<Announced on 2010-08-20 by Florian Ragwitz|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/08/msg163150.html>
3838
fdea69f9
FR
3839`How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought Alice;
3840`I might as well be at school at once.' However, she got up, and began to repeat
3841it, but her head was so full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what
3842she was saying, and the words came very queer indeed:--
3843
4ed12d4a
SH
3844 "'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare,
3845 "You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair."
3846 As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose
3847 Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.'
fdea69f9
FR
3848
3849
3850`That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' said the Gryphon.
3851
3852`Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it sounds uncommon
3853nonsense.'
3854
3855Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if
3856anything would ever happen in a natural way again.
3857
3858`I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle.
3859
3860`She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with the next verse.'
3861
3862`But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How could he turn them out
3863with his nose, you know?'
3864
3865`It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was dreadfully puzzled by
3866the whole thing, and longed to change the subject.
3867
0feeb912
DG
3868=head2 v5.13.3 - Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, "Good Omens"
3869
2831a86c
ZA
3870L<Announced on 2010-07-20 by David Golden|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/07/msg162230.html>
3871
0feeb912
DG
3872Look at Crowley, doing 110 mph on the M40 heading towards
3873Oxfordshire. Even the most resolutely casual observer would
3874notice a number of strange things about him. The clenched teeth,
3875for example, or the dull red glow coming from behind his
3876sunglasses. And the car. The car was a definite hint.
3877
3878Crowley had started the journey in his Bentley, and he was
3879dammned if he wasn't going to finish it in the Bentley as well.
3880Not that even the kind of car buff who owns his own pair of
3881motoring goggles would have been able to tell it was a vintage
3882Bentley. Not any more. They wouldn't have been able to tell
3883that it was a Bentley. They would only offer fifty-fifty that it
3884had ever even been a car.
3885
3886There was no paint left on it, for a start. It might still have
3887been black, where it wasn't a rusty, smudged reddish-brown, but
3888this was a dull charcoal black. It traveled in its own ball of
3889flame, like a space capsule making a particularly difficult
3890re-entry.
3891
3892There was a thin skin of crusted, melted rubber left around the
3893metal wheel rims, but seeing that the wheel rims were still
3894somhow riding an inch above the road surface this didn't seem to
3895make an awful lot of difference to the suspension.
3896
3897It should have fallen apart miles back.
3898
3c55f444
MT
3899=head2 v5.13.2 - Iain M Banks, "Use of Weapons"
3900
2831a86c
ZA
3901L<Announced on 2010-06-22 by Matt S Trout|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/06/msg161112.html>
3902
51caa79e
DG
3903We deal in the moral equivalent of black holes, where the normal laws -
3904the rules of right and wrong that people imagine apply everywhere else
3905in the universe - break down; beyond those metaphysical event-horizons,
3c55f444
MT
3906there exist ... special circumstances.
3907
3908=head2 v5.13.1 - Miguel de Unamuno, "The Sepulchre of Don Quixote"
d069c093 3909
2831a86c
ZA
3910L<Announced on 2010-05-20 by Ricardo Signes|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/05/msg160275.html>
3911
d069c093
RS
3912And if anyone shall come to you and say that he knows how to construct
3913bridges and that perhaps a time will come when you will wish to avail
3914yourself of his science in order to cross over a river, out with him! Out
3915with the engineer! Rivers will be crossed by wading or swimming them, even
3916if half the crusaders drown themselves. Let the engineer go off and build
3917bridges somewhere else, where they are badly wanted. For those who go in
3918quest of the sepulchre, faith is bridge enough.
3919
c7bed260
Z
3920=head2 v5.13.0 - Jules Verne, "A Journey to the Centre of the Earth"
3921
3922L<Announced on 2010-04-20 by LE<0xe9>on Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2010/04/msg159275.html>
3923
3924The heat still remained at quite a supportable degree. With an
3925involuntary shudder, I reflected on what the heat must have been
3926when the volcano of Sneffels was pouring its smoke, flames, and
3927streams of boiling lava -- all of which must have come up by the
3928road we were now following. I could imagine the torrents of hot
3929seething stone darting on, bubbling up with accompaniments of
3930smoke, steam, and sulphurous stench!
3931
3932"Only to think of the consequences," I mused, "if the old
3933volcano were once more to set to work."
3934
c682aa67
SH
3935=head2 v5.12.5 - William Shakespeare, "Measure for Measure"
3936
3937L<Announced on 2012-11-10 by Dominic Hargreaves|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2012/11/msg195171.html>
3938
3939 Music oft hath such a charm
3940 To make bad good, and good provoke to harm.
3941
3942=head2 v5.12.4 - William Schwenck Gilbert, "Trial By Jury"
3943
3944L<Announced on 2011-06-20 by Leon Brocard|http://www.nntp.perl.org/group/perl.perl5.porters/2011/06/msg173725.html>
3945
3946 You cannot eat breakfast all day,
3947 Nor is it the act of a sinner,
3948 When breakfast is taken away,
3949 To turn his attention to dinner;
3950 And it's not in the range of belief,
3951 To look upon him as a glutton,
3952 Who, when he is tired of beef,
3953 Determines to tackle the mutton.
3954 Ah! But this I am willing to say,
3955 If it will appease her sorrow,
3956 I'll marry this lady today,
3957 And I'll marry the other tomorrow!
3958
3959=head2 v5.12.4-RC2 - James Russell Lowell, "Eleanor makes macaroons"
3960